Latest / The Inspired Stories Podcast / The Heart of Childcare: Mariana's Journey from Mom to Entrepreneur | Childcare Series

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The Heart of Childcare: Mariana's Journey from Mom to Entrepreneur | Childcare Series · The Inspired Stories Podcast

0:04
Welcome to another edition of Inspired Stories, where leaders
0:07
share their experiences so we can learn from their successes,
0:10
how they've overcome adversity, and explore current challenges
0:13
they're facing. Welcome to another edition of
0:17
the Inspired Stories podcast, where leaders share their
0:20
experiences so we can learn from their successes and be inspired
0:23
by how they've overcome adversity.
0:26
My name is Anthony Codispotti and today's guest is Mariana
0:29
Perez Pena Flores. She is the oldest child of a
0:32
garbage truck driver and a nurse.
0:34
She raised her four kids with a philosophy of respect,
0:38
accountability, and honor. She started her first child care
0:42
business in 2003 with six children and today she is the
0:46
proud owner of A-Z Learning Center which has two child care
0:51
centers in San Antonio, TX and possibly a third location by the
0:55
end of the year. Their website is a the #2Z
0:59
learningcenters.com, A-Z learningcenters.com.
1:03
They believe that every child deserves a quality education,
1:06
regardless of means. Their approach is to provide a
1:09
safe, nurturing, and stimulating environment that promotes
1:13
learning, growth, and development.
1:16
They offer a diverse and inclusive program that caters to
1:19
the unique needs of each child, and they are dedicated to
1:22
fostering a love of learning in every child that walks through
1:25
their doors. They are family owned and
1:27
operated, and their roots run deep in the community.
1:30
They go beyond traditional childcare by offering a
1:33
nurturing environment that extends into the evening hours
1:35
and even offers nutritious dinner.
1:38
Now before we get into all that good stuff, today's episode is
1:41
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To find out if your company qualifies, contact us today at
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Add Back benefitsagency.com. Now back to our guest today, the
2:10
founder of A-Z Learning Center, Mariana, I appreciate you making
2:13
the time to Share your story today.
2:16
Thank you. I'm excited to be here.
2:18
OK, so let's go back to the beginning.
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What was the inspiration behind first starting your childcare
2:23
center? I had my eldest daughter put her
2:29
in daycare and had more separation anxiety than she did,
2:34
so I would go into work late every morning, take a long lunch
2:40
to visit her at daycare, and then leave as early as I
2:44
possibly could. When I was pregnant with my
2:47
second daughter, I decided that I didn't want to go through that
2:53
again so I took a severance package from the company that I
2:57
was working with and decided to stay home.
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Unfortunately, our family was used to the double income so it
3:07
was a struggle and by the grace of God we lived literally across
3:12
the street from an elementary school, a middle school, and
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high school. My sister had been working in
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childcare and had been doing it since she was 18.
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So her, my husband and I had a conversation about wouldn't it
3:26
be cool to open a daycare center in our home and we had the
3:31
perfect clientele. I really didn't expect to like
3:38
it as much as I did. I intentionally opened in the
3:41
summer thinking I wouldn't get that many kids in.
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I would say I tried really hard at it but it was just not for
3:48
me. I didn't think that people
3:51
needed care during the summer for their children.
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So within the first three months we were full and I ended up
4:02
falling in love with it. So that first summer, it sounds
4:07
like you were hoping this wouldn't work, almost somewhat
4:11
trying to sabotage the idea so you could say you gave it a try
4:14
and it and it and it didn't go right.
4:17
That's why you're. I really did.
4:19
I really did. I was like, I'm not going to
4:21
want to raise other people's children.
4:23
I'm not going to be good at it. What if I offend somebody?
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What if they don't like the way we do things?
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I didn't want to be accountable for making a mistake or, you
4:36
know, offending somebody. So I was like, but I'm excited
4:40
to stay home with my own hits. So it's a win win situation.
4:45
But the more children that came in and getting to know their
4:50
families, I, I fell in love with it.
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What did you love the most? The experiences that we had with
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the kids, being at home with my two girls, I was like, I'm going
5:04
to be able to go to the park, I'm going to go to the zoo,
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we're going to go on family outings.
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And now I had a couple of other children with me.
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And thank God I had my sister too.
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I'm Lupita. Because I was able to still do
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those things that I wanted to do with her by my side.
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So we were able to still go on the outings, go, you know, on
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the nature walks, visit, you know, the zoo.
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We are lucky to have Fiesta Texas theme park here in San
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Antonio and SeaWorld. So we did all those things.
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But the idea that the parents were like, sure, go ahead, take
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them. I trust you.
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You know, Oh my gosh, that's something I wouldn't be able to
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do. And the thing that touched my
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heart most was some of the parents were like, I really
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can't afford it. And your children were under the
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age that we could go in for free.
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So I was like, don't worry about it.
6:00
You know, we're, we're going to be real careful.
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This is the time we're going to leave.
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This is the time we're going to get back.
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And it worked. It it was great.
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It worked. And so how did you fill up so
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quickly? How were your how were you
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finding these students, these children?
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Word of mouth. It was all word of mouth.
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I started off with my husband's niece and one teacher across the
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streets who was doing summer school, and from there it just
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grew. And so how long were you running
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it out of your home before you decided to open up a standalone
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center? I actually did it from 2003
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until 2008 and 2008. I had an amazing licensing Rep
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who said you're always full. We have this space.
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Why don't you apply for rezoning with the city of San Antonio and
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open up a full daycare center? So our home literally became a
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daycare center the first year that we did.
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It was really hard sharing our living space with four other
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children. And my husband was wonderful
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enough, and I tugged hard enough too to convince him to add some
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square footage to our house. So when we rezoned, half of the
7:27
our house was the daycare center and the other half was our home.
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And so how long did you continue to operate it out of your home
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before you you took the next step?
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We operated it out of our home till 2012, 2013.
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We ended up getting so big that we needed the rooms, the square
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footage, so we bought another house and the whole house became
8:02
a daycare center. And at that time, I was able to
8:06
get a second and a third facility.
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So you were up to three facilities at one point and then
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did you have to close one or more facilities maybe during
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COVID? No, actually it happened in
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2014, 2016. I'm sorry.
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I had to close one facility. We were leasing some space out
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of a church and I didn't know my guidelines for the state.
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So whenever you renovate a space or you're bringing it up to
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code, you only get 90 days to do so.
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I didn't do my research, so that was totally on me.
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And I didn't communicate it with the church either.
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So there they were working on the plumbing and the HVAC
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system. It was the whole church that was
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being done. The 90 days expired on us, so I
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was forced to go out and turn in the license and I was down to
9:09
two centers. That's frustrating.
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It was, but at the time it we made it work at that time, we
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added more square footage to our our home.
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So we were able to actually move the children over.
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The advantage that I have is my facilities are literally 7 to 10
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minutes away from each other. So we were able to accommodate
9:36
the parents that we had and it wasn't too much of A disruption
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or an inconvenience. OK.
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And So what does it look like now?
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You've got 2 centers now? Is one of them still in your
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home? Yes.
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OK. One of them's in your home and
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the other one is the other location that's seven to 10
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minutes away, yes, OK. And there are plans thoughts
9:58
about 1/3 facility? Yes, I'm actually working with
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another church that I've had a relationship with for going on
10:06
10 years. They had a school and a daycare
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center. During COVID it closed so I'm
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going to be going into their facility.
10:16
What's the timeline for that? Hopefully by January.
10:20
OK, so December 2nd and So what is happening right now, you need
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to get a new license, you need to do some refurbishing of the
10:30
place. We need to get the properties
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rezoned by the city from San Antonio.
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The church is actually working on that.
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Once that is taken care of, then we'll go into our licensing
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application. The application takes on average
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about 45 days. Within that time, I need to make
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sure we have our CFO, our health permit and our fire inspection.
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What was the first thing you mentioned?
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Your C. Our CFO, our certificate of
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occupancy. OK.
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And so how far is this location from the other two?
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It's about 7 minutes away from the second location and 15
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minutes away from the first location.
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That makes it easier for you to kind of get around and be able
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to visit all of them when you need to.
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It does. The other thing is I
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intentionally focus on title one areas.
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So title 1 is what are school districts label as low income at
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risk families. So I look to go into those
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communities that I can service, that I can have an impact on.
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Why is that so important to you? Because they're the ones that
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need us. I use my children as an example
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of what they can one day accomplish or one day be.
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Everybody assumed that being that I was a business owner for
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daycares, my kids were automatically That was their
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destiny. That was their fate.
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It was said and done. My oldest daughter lives in New
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York City right now. She's working with a school, but
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her ambition actually is to go into finance.
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She's a math whiz. My second oldest is going to be
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graduating from school this year, and she is actually a
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construction project manager. She's in the construction field.
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My third oldest, my son, is going to school.
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He's in his junior year. He would like to be a mariachi
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director. He actually is studying to be a
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teacher for music, but he specifies and focuses on
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mariachi music. And my youngest is in her senior
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year of school. She is part of the leadership
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for their Junior ROTC program. She would like to go into
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linguistics and her goal is to work for the FBI and travel the
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world. Wow, that was a whole lot of
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proud Mama moments there. And you give a lot of credit to
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where they are and the positive trajectory that they're headed
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on because of what you were able to provide them at such an early
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age, right? And that's what you want to be
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able to provide to other kids. Exactly.
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We figured out what they were interested in.
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I had an aha moment about 3 weeks ago.
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I was talking to all four of them.
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We were talking about how competitive they are with each
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other and I was like, guys, I taught you to be competitive.
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I really taught them to be competitive.
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We are a sports family. I would tease them and tell them
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second place was first place loser, which is not a good thing
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I admit, but it was fun. It was kind of like you do your
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best 110% all the time. So I told them I've talked to
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you guys to strive and give 100% for anything and everything that
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you do. We don't halfway anything, but
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why are you guys so competitive with each other?
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And they were like, mom, you set the foundation for that.
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It's not only about what we do in everyday world, but it's a
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part of our lives. It's who we are.
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And I thought, wow, I think I kind of messed up on that one.
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But at the same time, they said you never, even though you
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exposed us all to the same thing, you never said you all
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have to do this. It was kind of like, what are
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you interested? What do you want to do?
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And I think a lot of times parents forget, look at what
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they're playing with, look at what they're pretending to do,
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Look at what draws their interest, look at what they take
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their time with. Yes, there's outlets for them to
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do other things like they might not be, you know, set off for
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the Olympics in volleyball or in baseball professionals, but
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that's a good outlet of what do they really want to do.
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And I think we forget that. So when I ask the kids in our
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program, especially the 8 to 13 year olds, what you want to do,
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What are your goals? What are you looking forward to
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when you get older? I want them to list that.
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I want them to focus on it. I want them to think about it
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because at the end of the day, they're the ones that are going
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to determine when and how they get that.
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It's not going to be their parents, it's going to be them.
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And that's where the accountability comes in.
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The decisions that you make, the choices that you have, that's
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going to get you there, but what are you going to do to get
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there? So how can you as a a childcare
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provider start to instill some of that thinking, some of those
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values in really young children in these very formative young
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years? We're not allowed to say I can't
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at the daycare center. It's considered a bad word.
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We can say I'm trying to figure it out.
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I'm going to try to do it. It's difficult right now or I'm
16:45
practicing it, but we cannot say I cannot because there's nothing
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we physically, mentally, emotionally cannot do.
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We're the drivers of our destiny, of our fate, of our
17:01
future. But it's get sad, get
17:07
overwhelmed, get frustrated, dust yourself off, take a
17:11
breath. It was a bad moment.
17:14
And then keep moving forward. So I want to better understand
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Title one areas. These sound like lower income
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areas, probably folks that would have trouble financially
17:26
affording or accessing childcare.
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How are you able to make this extremely valuable and needed
17:36
service available to them? A lot of our families qualify
17:41
for subsidized childcare. The ones that don't child care
17:48
is expensive and I'm not gonna lie, it's very expensive.
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But what I do is I have my own tuition assistance program that
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we use for our families because I am a Texas rising *4 star
18:05
center. It allows me to get the maximum
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rate back from our city and other programs for child care,
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the subsidized program. But when I became a four-star
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program, I didn't anticipate it putting me out of reach for the
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families that I was targeting. I was always that middle class
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family where we didn't qualify because we my husband made too
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much money when we were just had his income alone.
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But at the same time, we didn't, we couldn't afford to send them
18:46
to a private child care center. So we were kind of stuck in the
18:50
middle. And that was what was happening.
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Now, once I became a four-star center, those families that
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didn't qualify for subsidized care couldn't afford to be in
19:02
our program. So I needed to figure some way
19:05
out to still be able to get them what they wanted as long as I
19:12
was within their their comfort level for for affordable
19:19
childcare in all honesty. And so how were you able to do
19:23
that? How are you able to offer some
19:25
of your own, I forget the term that you use, but basically your
19:28
own subsidy or your own payment support?
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I call it a tuition assistance. So I use some of the funds to
19:36
reinvest in our program. I use the funds to make sure
19:41
that our teachers are covered and then rather than taking that
19:46
profit, I used 30% of those funds and I use it for tuition
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assistance. Wow, that's incredibly generous.
19:58
Yes, but if I didn't do that, I I wouldn't be able to have the
20:06
experiences that I have with these children.
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I that was my goal. That was.
20:11
My drive in, that's the only way I'm going to be able to still do
20:14
what I what I intended to do. So your goals for growth are
20:21
perhaps maybe not as much about increased profit, but more about
20:28
how can you provide the kind of support to more kids that's
20:33
needed, especially in these lower income areas.
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Like how can you how can you reach the the the greatest
20:39
number of children and make the biggest impact?
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That's what I like to do. You hear so much about the
20:47
generation today, the kids in school, we lack manners where
20:54
egocentric. It's all about them.
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You know, we've got our faces in our tablets, in our cell phones,
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on the computer, and for eight to 10 hours a day I have them in
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my care. And for eight to 10 hours, we're
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a technology limited facility. There are no televisions,
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there's no computers, there's no laptops, there's no iPads,
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there's no cell phones. We're there for the experience.
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I want them to play, I want them to discover, I want them to
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imagine, I want them to use their minds.
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But most importantly, I want them to engage and interact not
21:39
only with each other, but with adults.
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I'm probably crossing the line, but I I want to be able to say
21:48
this is how you talk to somebody respectfully.
21:51
This is how you engage with them.
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This is how you ask for something.
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This is how you're humble. This is how you're gracious.
21:57
These are manners, and I don't think there's a foundation for
22:02
it in the schools. They're already overwhelmed
22:06
with, you know, not having enough staff and then having
22:10
children from all different ages.
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So at least for the time that I have them in our care, that's
22:19
one of the foundations that we focus on.
22:22
Talk to me more about what goes on there day-to-day, like what
22:25
the curriculum's like. I, I, I get this sense of, or I
22:29
understand what you're doing with teaching sort of the
22:32
foundation of manners and you know, how to, to treat other
22:35
people. Let's hear more about that and
22:38
sort of like what What else is involved in the curriculum?
22:42
The biggest focus that we have is ironically not reading and
22:47
writing. It's more of the social
22:50
interaction and the emotional impact for the kids.
22:58
So we focus more on how they interact with each other and how
23:04
they self regulate because there's a lot of frustration, a
23:08
lot of getting overwhelmed and not knowing how to communicate
23:13
it. For a lot of kids, it's, you
23:16
know, throwing toys on the floor, dropping and crying and
23:19
frustration, yelling. But when you start to teach them
23:23
problem solving skills of OK, this, you're having a moment,
23:27
it's not that big a deal. Express it the way you need to
23:31
express it. When you're done, we'll talk
23:33
about different options that you have.
23:36
So yes, I know you're going to knock the toys off the table and
23:41
that's OK, you're going to do that.
23:43
But once you're done and you calm down, you're going to put
23:46
those items back on the table. And then you're going to think
23:50
instead of throwing the toys off the table, what could I have
23:54
done differently? But I have said, I'm angry.
23:57
Give me a minute. I need to be alone or I'm
24:01
frustrated. I really want that toy now.
24:04
Is there something else I can play with or just, you know, I'm
24:08
having a bad morning. I need a minute.
24:11
So we start off at a very young age.
24:15
Once they can start talking, just talking about, you know,
24:19
the understanding of it's a moment, it's not your whole day,
24:24
it's a minute in time. The ugly comes out of us and
24:29
it's OK because we're human and it's gonna happen.
24:32
But once it's over, what do we do to keep going forward?
24:37
Our discipline philosophy is a little different.
24:40
We have common corners and calming areas.
24:44
Everybody's using that now. That's what we're using for self
24:47
regulation. But we also have the children go
24:51
and touch a wall and even at the age of 2, counting with them and
24:56
breathing, counting to 10123 and so on.
25:02
And once they get to 10, we tell them, OK, it's in the past,
25:08
we're going to start new and we're going to keep going
25:10
forward because there's nothing we can do to change how they
25:15
acted or how they reacted. The only thing we can do is give
25:19
them the options of what they can possibly choose to do next
25:23
time going forward. What's the touching the wall
25:26
part of it? What does that?
25:27
Do because it offers more senses.
25:29
So I found that not only are they breathing, not only are
25:34
they focusing by counting, but they're actually involving touch
25:38
now. So they're touching the wall
25:41
just to kind of press on it and it kind of, and it helps them
25:46
soothe. They're focusing on that sense
25:49
of touch, focusing on counting and breathing, and then we kind
25:52
of move on. You know one thing I'm curious
25:56
about as you've got 2 centers very close to each other and a
25:59
third one coming all in the same geography.
26:01
Do you have any concerns about being sort of over saturated or
26:06
do you think the demand is there for what you're offering?
26:10
I think the demand is there for what we're offering.
26:13
I think my biggest fear is being stretched too thin.
26:18
It's a philosophy that I have. It's one that I really push on
26:22
practicing with the teachers. It's really easy to come in and
26:31
teach somebody how to be that way, but it takes practice
26:36
before somebody's really good at the technique or identifying a
26:40
child before they trigger or that they're going to trigger.
26:44
So I think right now my biggest fear is being stretched a little
26:48
thin between the three locations.
26:51
When you say stretched thin, you mean from like a management
26:54
perspective, being able to staff and train the folks the the
26:58
workers there appropriately? Yes, I I'm a little bit of a
27:04
control freak, I'm not going to lie.
27:06
So I always want to be there and I try my best to be at both
27:12
facilities right now. But having a third one, I think
27:16
that's my biggest fear is not being able to keep give each
27:20
facility the attention that I need to.
27:23
I am working with both of my sisters right now on teaching
27:27
them, you know what we're doing, how we do it.
27:31
My husband helps out as much as I can pull him away from his
27:37
work to do it too. But that's that's the goal is
27:43
making sure that philosophy is spread out there.
27:46
So I do want multiple locations. I know I can't do this all
27:50
myself. I'm going to need a community.
27:53
Let's talk about this control freak part of your personality
27:57
right now, because you know, it's interesting is I've
28:00
interviewed lots of business owners.
28:03
You kind of have one role when you're in start up mode, right?
28:06
When you had the just in your home without expanding your
28:09
home, just you had six kids, you've got your hands on
28:11
everything, right? You're you're doing all parts of
28:14
the operation and now it expands, you know, first in your
28:18
home and then to a second center and now with the third center,
28:21
the role that you have to play shifts a bit, right?
28:26
Have you noticed that? Yes.
28:28
What what have you noticed are the big changes?
28:31
The biggest changes, I don't have the classroom to myself and
28:36
I miss that. I like being in the classroom
28:40
with the kids. If I'm having a hard day, if I'm
28:43
just overwhelmed, if I need to just kind of calm down, I like
28:49
to take over a classroom. It just for some reason, the
28:51
kids just really calm and comfort.
28:55
Me, you and I are wired very differently, Mariana, and I love
28:58
that because we need more people like you.
29:00
I'm sorry. Go ahead.
29:01
Is so my favorite costume is actually the toddlers.
29:05
Some people refer to them as the terrible tears.
29:08
I love them I like that look at what I did aha moment look I
29:13
figured this out or that's amazing so I love 2 year olds.
29:20
They're a little more trying, they're a little more
29:24
egocentric, but at the same time you can't get away from that aha
29:29
moment. So I love them.
29:33
Now that I'm in the role where I'm out of expanding, I don't
29:37
get to be in the classroom as much as I want.
29:39
And I think that's the hardest part of letting go is not having
29:43
a classroom to myself. And I'm very hands on.
29:48
So I like talking to the parents.
29:51
I like knowing all the kids names, trying to know what all
29:55
their interest is, trying to figure out what upsets them and
29:59
what excites them. So that's I think the hardest
30:05
part is not being able to have that bond the way I want it.
30:10
I feel like I'm limited in that the paperwork, it's not my cup
30:16
of tea. It never really has been.
30:18
So I've always found somebody who will handle the paperwork
30:21
art for me. I will go back and review it.
30:24
So it's my my job to audit it and make sure it's where it
30:31
needs to be. But to organize it and put it
30:34
together some, I'll let somebody else who's good at that.
30:38
Doing that, that's the beauty of delegation, right?
30:41
Figuring out the parts that you love, the parts that you're not
30:44
as naturally inclined to. And yeah, being able to find
30:48
your energies in the right place.
30:50
I think finding A-Team and identifying what they're good at
30:54
and then drawing on their strengths as well.
30:56
I get distracted very quickly and I recognize that.
31:02
That's probably why I bond with two year olds as much as I do.
31:05
I get distracted very quickly, but I know people who are like
31:11
really focused on certain things.
31:13
I have Miss Naomi at center number three who is amazing.
31:17
And I can tell her, you know, I have a vision of a theme and I
31:22
just explained a couple of details and she runs with it.
31:26
And then I have my sister Lisa, who is amazing at organizing and
31:31
paperwork, and she does an amazing job of making sure the
31:35
paperwork at both facilities is down pat.
31:38
And then I have teachers like Miss Monticella, Miss Renita,
31:43
Miss Yvonne, who are just really good at bonding with the kids
31:48
and teaching them and, you know, figuring out what tools they
31:53
need to use, not toys, tools that they need to use to get the
31:58
kids interested in reading or doing math.
32:02
It's not always a worksheet or a handout in front of you.
32:05
Sometimes it's kind of like I, I don't want to count.
32:09
And she's like, OK, but you know what?
32:11
I got this awesome box of trucks and I know you love trucks.
32:15
Can you help me make sure we know how many we have?
32:18
And boom, they're counting. So you have to look for the
32:22
right support team to help you and draw from their strengths in
32:27
order to make the system work. Let's talk about your support
32:31
team because you know, so many business owners that I talked
32:34
to, it's hard to find and then to retain, you know, really good
32:39
folks. I'm curious what you've tried in
32:42
the past and what you found is working.
32:46
What I found is working is letting them know from the
32:51
beginning what I am upfront. I let them know from the
32:56
beginning I am a control freak. I do have a little OCD of
33:02
certain things and I ask for their forgiveness in advance.
33:05
I like puzzles. And I mean I like puzzles.
33:11
We're talking like jigsaw puzzles or.
33:13
I'm yes, jigsaw puzzles. So I like them because they're a
33:17
good foundation for math skills and problem solving skills.
33:20
So from the time they're babies on up to 13, we have puzzles
33:25
everywhere. If there's a piece missing, the
33:28
day does not end until we find that missing means.
33:32
And both facilities, the teachers understand that I am a
33:36
math person, so they're going to care about math in every single
33:40
aspect that I can throw it in for their day, for their
33:44
environment, for the way they teach.
33:48
I also let them know that I'm very protective of the kids that
33:52
we have. So for that moment of time that
33:56
the parents trust their children to be with us, I'm going to look
34:00
at how they're treated, how we talk to them, how we interact
34:05
with them. If we're bonding with them.
34:07
I I'm going to pay attention to that.
34:09
So I let them know up front. There are certain things that I
34:13
am a little specific about and that they're going to hear
34:20
about. And then the goals that I have,
34:22
and I let them know up front, you're either with us or this is
34:26
just a job for you. If this is just a job where
34:29
you're looking for a paycheck, this is not the place for you to
34:32
be. If you're here because you want
34:35
to change a life, have an impact of a life, touch your child then
34:41
and be, you know, part of who they are for the rest of their
34:44
lives, then this is the place you need to be.
34:48
But if you're looking to, you know, make a a paycheck, this is
34:54
not the ones. And that really helps to filter
34:57
out the folks that probably aren't a good fit for you.
35:00
I learned that I needed to because before I was trying to
35:03
sell myself a I'm very flexible, we're all A-Team, family comes
35:09
first philosophy. That was great, but it was
35:14
bringing in people that I felt I was taking care of more than
35:20
they were taking care of the daycare camps.
35:23
So I actually went to a training and I learned 22 years later I
35:31
learned that. It's never too late, right?
35:34
Mariana, you. Know what it really isn't I, It
35:37
really had a change on my philosophy, but I thought I was
35:43
bad or wrong for focusing so much on what they brought to the
35:51
facility. And then then I realized it's
35:53
about how valuable somebody is to your program.
35:57
Not the value your program has on that staff person, but how
36:01
much value they bring into your program.
36:03
So if I'm constantly fixing things for them, if I am
36:07
constantly finding I have to go in and take over the class or
36:14
you know, they're calling out a lot or I'm having to apologize
36:17
to a parent or a situation. They're not only taking value
36:21
away from my program, but they're taking value away from
36:24
me because instead of doing something else, I'm fixing
36:28
something else. And that's not going to work.
36:30
I need things to run as smooth as possible.
36:33
Are we going to have hiccups? Yes.
36:36
Are we going to have perfect days?
36:38
We're going to try our best to not every day is going to be
36:40
perfect, but at the same time, that's always the ultimate.
36:46
I want to talk about the parents a little bit.
36:48
I'm curious, what are some of the common concerns that parents
36:52
have when starting their kids in a new childcare center like
36:57
yours and and what can you tell them to help put their minds at
36:59
ease? The biggest concern they have is
37:03
men in childcare because I am family based.
37:08
My husband is there, my son is there, my daughter's boyfriend
37:14
is there. I do have, I have had my
37:23
coworkers, nephews work there and that's the biggest and the
37:28
saddest cuisine that there is because they don't realize how
37:35
much men have a good positive influence on their children,
37:42
especially when someone leaves. Families don't have a positive
37:46
male figure in their life. That's a good point.
37:50
So I think that's the the biggest concern that they had.
37:55
The other one is do we have cameras in the facility?
38:00
I do not have cameras in my facility.
38:03
The reason being is not everybody is comfortable with
38:07
having their child on video or other parents to observe.
38:12
Some parents still have privacy concerns.
38:16
Some children cannot be videotaped or photographed.
38:20
And for that reason I don't want to keep my facility from being
38:26
able to service these children as well.
38:29
We do work with children that are in foster care.
38:32
We do work with the battered women's shelter here.
38:35
We do have families, for whatever reason, do not want
38:39
their children videotaped or photographed.
38:41
So for their privacy and out of respect for them and every other
38:45
child who doesn't get to make the decision for themselves of
38:49
whether they want to be videotaped or photographed, I
38:52
just don't have it out. There, you know, interesting
38:55
point you make about the concern of men in the child care center.
39:00
My boys are 8 and 10 now, so it's been a few years, but they
39:03
were in a local child care center here.
39:05
That was amazing. We got to know the owners pretty
39:09
well and we really enjoyed the, the experience.
39:12
But I do remember, you know, walking into a couple of
39:15
classrooms for the first time and seeing men providing the
39:19
service. And it was, it was a moment of
39:21
pause for me. It's like, well, that's a little
39:24
unusual. Let me get to know this person
39:27
and, you know, have a little chat.
39:28
And, and they were some of the greatest care providers in the
39:31
facility. My kids still talk about Mr.
39:35
Jared, the nature guy because he, he brought in animals and he
39:40
did like little skits with his guitar and, and, and sung about
39:43
nature and the he, he was a big hit with all the kids.
39:46
But so even as a guy, like I, I kind of get that it's like,
39:51
that's a little bit unusual. But to your point, like what a
39:55
great thing to be able to put like a good.
40:01
Male figure role model into these young kids lives who might
40:05
not have that in their home environment.
40:08
And the other thing about it is these men don't leave them.
40:13
My son goes to college every year and comes back and they
40:18
look forward to it. How is Mr. Vicente going to be
40:21
here for Christmas break? Is Mr. Vicente coming for the
40:25
summer this year? He was gone for a little bit for
40:28
a band program, and they were so excited for him and excited with
40:34
him. And he was like, wow, you know,
40:36
if you're in abandoned middle school and high school one day,
40:39
you could do this. And it's really exciting and
40:42
fun. And, you know, my husband is a
40:47
project manager for the state and he works with environment,
40:51
the environment. And so they're like, oh, Mr.
40:55
Rick. And this is what Mr. Rick is
40:57
known for. Mr. Rick is known for Star Wars.
41:00
My husband is a huge Star Wars friend.
41:02
Have you seen the new episode on the Disney Channel?
41:05
And Oh my God, it's so great. Do you have any new Legos?
41:09
We buy him every single Star Wars item there is.
41:15
So when he comes in with new shirts, they're all excited to
41:17
see them. But again, it's something that
41:20
he can bond with them about. So if there's a new Star Wars
41:24
program or I mean a new Star Wars show, or if there's a, a
41:29
new Star Wars Lego, the first thing, when is Mr. when is he
41:34
gonna be here? Look, I, I need to tell him what
41:36
I got or I need to tell him what I saw.
41:38
So there's something that they can bond with them about.
41:42
It's yeah, it. And like I said, they look
41:45
forward to it. Plus, the most important thing
41:47
is for some of these children, these men don't leave their
41:50
lives. They don't enter and then
41:52
disappear. They're gonna be there.
41:55
And I think that's really important as well.
41:58
And it's great how your husband's personality really
42:01
comes out right? Yes, it really does.
42:05
I'm I'm curious, what advice do you have for parents who maybe
42:09
are trying to decide between multiple options, different
42:14
childcare centers? Look for a program that puts
42:19
your child first. Look for a program that is very
42:25
transparent when parents ask, you know, what facility that
42:32
uses an app, just like most facilities do, you know?
42:36
So we tell our parents we're going to take a picture of your
42:40
child in an activity, whether they're crying or elated about
42:46
it. We're not going to hide
42:48
anything. You need to know, was this a
42:51
good experience? Was it something they like doing
42:53
or you know what? They really were uncomfortable
42:56
doing it. They they were like, no, get it
42:59
away from me. But you need to be transparent.
43:03
When parents first start their children, I always tell them
43:06
it's going to take two to three weeks for them to adjust.
43:09
If you call and ask, hey, is is how's my child doing?
43:13
And I'm going to tell you whether they're crying or
43:17
they're bonding really quickly. I'm not going to lie to you.
43:19
Why? Because you need to know not
43:23
only how we're messing with them and how they're meshing with us.
43:27
Not every program is going to be the right program for your
43:29
child. And you need to look at those
43:32
cues. The other thing is making sure
43:37
that you have a bond with not only the owner or the director,
43:43
but with the teacher as well. Because the teacher is the one
43:46
who's going to bond with your child.
43:49
The teacher's the one who's going to communicate with you.
43:52
The teacher's the one who, in a sense, is helping you raise your
43:56
child. That's good advice.
44:00
I'm curious to hear. Maybe like a particular success
44:04
story of a child in your center. Maybe it was a kid who was
44:09
struggling to bet when he or she first came in and you guys were
44:13
really able to make a big impact.
44:17
I don't think we made a big impact on him as much as he made
44:22
an impact on us. He required a little more
44:32
attention. He was non verbal when he came
44:36
to us, had been kicked out a couple of centers because he was
44:42
just a little more rambunctious and he stole my heart.
44:48
He just had a different way of communicating with people and a
44:53
different way of interacting. But once we found what he was
44:58
interested in it it it was amazing.
45:02
And I always tell people I don't take children out of our
45:10
program. I never fire a child.
45:15
I look to see how we can change their lives, but at the end of
45:21
the day, it's how they change ours.
45:24
And he made me look at children in a very different way because
45:30
the first day he got there, we were strangers.
45:35
And that's the one thing I think that we forget sometimes is
45:38
we're strangers. So his mom dropped him off.
45:42
We put him in a classroom. The classroom was a little
45:46
overwhelming for him with all the stuff that we had posted and
45:49
all the toys that he wanted to touch and experience everything.
45:54
And in a matter of 10 minutes, he ran snack to that room and I
45:58
mean, emptied out every container, spread the toys all
46:03
over the place, was taking toys from children.
46:06
It was just, it was a hot mess. A real tornado.
46:11
It was bad to the point where my teacher cried because her room
46:16
was literally destroyed. Once we both kind of got past
46:21
it, we thought what happened, what was different?
46:27
And then that aha moment came. She said at one point I was
46:31
really scared because I didn't know what to do.
46:33
And I was like, you know what? So was I because I didn't know
46:37
how to comfort him or how to even respond to him.
46:41
And then we both looked at each other and thought he probably
46:45
was scared too. And we didn't even think about
46:49
that. So now we ask parents, bring
46:53
them in. Please understand we're
46:57
strangers, just like they're strangers to us.
47:01
Give us time to get to know each other.
47:03
But any information you can give us would be really, really
47:07
helpful. Because he's the one who turned
47:10
me on to remembering every time we take our child to school that
47:16
they passed another grade. There are strangers in their
47:21
lives. The teacher is a stranger, some
47:23
of their classmates are strangers, administration's
47:26
strangers. And we forget that as exciting
47:30
as a time that is, it's got to be a very scary and overwhelming
47:34
time. And we forget that they're just.
47:37
Kids, that's a really powerful lesson.
47:41
I'm glad you brought that up because like there was just this
47:46
chaotic moment, right? This real like typhoon of a, of
47:51
a, of a child just sort of tearing the room apart.
47:53
Don't know what to do. You were actually frightened of
47:56
this little person. And, and then it dawns on you
48:00
like, well, of course the, you know, everybody shows their
48:02
emotions in, in slightly different ways.
48:04
And this child was just scared. And that that was how it was
48:07
coming out of his body. That's how his central nervous
48:10
system was communicating it. And so when you recognize that,
48:14
like what? You go and give the guy a hug,
48:17
like like what's what's the, what's the approach?
48:20
We ask, do you need a hug? Do you need a moment?
48:25
Do you want to be by yourself? Because even a baby will let you
48:30
know. It's like, oh, can I hold you?
48:32
And if they're wiggly, no, they don't want to be home.
48:35
How to just give them a minute. I think we forget that we need
48:41
to ask permission as much as we expect children to ask now, what
48:46
do you want? What do you need?
48:48
Sometimes it's a toy, sometimes it's a blanket.
48:51
Sometimes, you know, it's just letting them go through their
48:55
emotions and then when they're done, it'll be OK.
48:59
I tease everybody that sometimes we forget kids need to go
49:05
through their emotions and go through all of them because if
49:09
we keep interrupting them, we're hitting the start button and
49:13
they're starting all over us again from the beginning.
49:15
Sometimes you need to let them process through all the phases
49:19
and then once they're done, they're done.
49:21
But we don't give them room to do that because we're always
49:25
like settle down, eye it down, calm down, and we forget.
49:29
We can't. You know, two really powerful
49:34
lessons there that are great reminders for me as a father of
49:37
two young boys. And something that I've been
49:40
talking with my wife quite a bit about the, you know, the first
49:42
one is when these big feelings come up, my natural instinct is
49:47
to try to interrupt or redirect that because I think that'll put
49:54
them in a better place. And selfishly, like it would put
49:58
me in a better place to not have sort of this noise and this
50:00
chaos. But I've begun to realize more
50:03
and more the importance of letting them feel these really
50:06
big feelings, Not not only feel like encourage them to come out
50:11
like, you know, rather than trying to hold it back and tamp
50:14
it down and, you know, redirect right away.
50:16
It's like, no, like, get as big as you need to right here and
50:20
get it out. And then, you know, as they're
50:24
sort of naturally starting to come down, I like the other
50:27
thing that you said, which is kind of give them choices,
50:30
right? Do you need a blanket?
50:31
Do you need a hug? Do you need some space?
50:33
My wife and I, you know, did this with my son last night.
50:36
He was having a rough moment and because he didn't want to get
50:39
back to his homework. And so we let him feel the big
50:42
feelings. And then, you know, when he was
50:44
sort of settling down a little bit, she's like, would you like
50:46
mom to help you with your homework or dad, right.
50:50
It wasn't a choice of do your homework or not do your
50:52
homework, but it's giving him some sense of a choice and
50:55
control, which it didn't flip a huge giant switch, but it was a
51:00
small one because he said, I want mom and, and then, and then
51:03
they did it and then they did the homework.
51:05
And so I, I think those were two great lessons that you pointed
51:07
out there. Yeah, it's, it's nice to reflect
51:14
and think, OK, you know, I've learned and this is what we need
51:18
to start doing going forward. It's upsetting because again, I
51:24
have a 24 year old, a 21 year old, a 20 year old and a 17 year
51:30
old. And I'm like, man, I wish I had
51:33
known that then and I'm just figuring it out now.
51:38
Better late than never and you get to teach it to a whole new
51:41
generation of kids. Exactly, but I think this is
51:45
what my parents were talking about when I used to go, I don't
51:49
understand how you were so hard on us and with the grandkids.
51:53
It's like you're telling me I need to be different.
51:55
I'm using your philosophy, I'm using your your techniques and
52:00
they're going. They were not with right and and
52:05
not now realizing now I know what they were talking about.
52:10
Yeah, Mariana, I'm curious to hear about a particular
52:15
challenge that you experienced either personally or
52:19
professionally, and maybe some of the lessons that you learned
52:22
coming out the other side. I learned that I can overcome or
52:30
handle anything because I've already had, at this point, the
52:37
big, big bad experience. So in 2015, my husband had been
52:51
suffering headaches, was taking Tylenol, thought it was just,
52:55
you know, getting older. It things happen, it's probably
52:59
allergies. And it turned out that he had a
53:03
massive brain. He had a cyst and it wasn't, you
53:08
know, something that you hear about or you know about.
53:12
This was like one in a million things that he had.
53:16
And I remember, I remember taking him to the hospital and
53:24
them telling me there there's nothing wrong with him.
53:27
It's just a headache. And me going, I've spent enough
53:32
time with kids, I've spent enough time with therapists to
53:37
know something's wrong. And the doctor telling me you're
53:42
really wasting our time for a headache.
53:44
And me going, you're going to do an MRI and a CAT scan now, or
53:49
I'm going to raise a fuss. So you can do it professionally
53:53
and respect my wishes, or I can raise a fuss and you're going to
53:57
do it that way. And I, I've always had a big
54:00
personality when it comes to that because my parents weren't
54:05
in the best health towards the end of their lives.
54:07
So I grew up in the hospital knowing, you know, when you had
54:12
to push away, they did the MRI and then they put us in a room,
54:20
had him sitting in a chair and said, OK, well, we're just
54:23
waiting for the results. And then we're going to send you
54:24
home. And I'm like, OK, you know, you
54:29
respected my wishes. OK.
54:30
And then having seven doctors come out and say we're so sorry
54:41
as a mess, we're calling an emergency surgeon in right now
54:46
in my world, just turning upside down because to have seven
54:49
people approach you like that, you know it's bad.
54:54
And here I am at the height of my career and I have 3 daycare
55:01
centers and the best team possible.
55:06
And I'm getting ready to open another one, a bigger 1.
55:10
So I, I wait for them to get us upstairs and the, the surgeon on
55:20
call comes in and says we're calling in our best surgeon.
55:26
This is something that's very unique.
55:28
And I'm like, OK, explain it to me.
55:30
And he's like, I'm not sure you're not, you're going to
55:32
understand. I'm like, my mom was in LVN.
55:36
Just tell me I'll, I'll understand it.
55:39
I also went to school and I, I liked math and science.
55:43
So I had an associate's degree in biology and anatomy.
55:47
So I understood, you know, I knew what they were going to be
55:49
talking about. And when they explained it and
55:52
they were like, we're getting in someone who has experience in
55:55
this, he can do it. The next morning, the surgeon on
56:02
the floor comes in and says we're gonna have to schedule
56:06
surgery for him. He's got swelling of the brain.
56:09
It's bad. But we've got a couple of days
56:11
to help drain fluid from his brain and then we can do the
56:14
surgery. And I'm like, OK, I'm gonna tell
56:17
the family, you know it, it's gonna be OK.
56:20
And then two hours later, the main surgeon, the the one that
56:24
they called in, Doctor Victor, says you have to make a decision
56:29
right now. If I don't do surgery within the
56:34
next few hours, he's going to die.
56:37
And I'm like, OK, then do the surgery.
56:39
He's like, no, ma'am, you need to understand when I do the
56:43
surgery, he still might die. So I need a decision right now.
56:48
What do you want to do? And all I thought was I just
56:54
told my kids everything was going to be OK.
56:58
So I made a decision not to tell anybody how severe it was
57:04
because I didn't want to focus on comforting them.
57:09
I wanted to make sure I maintained my strength to focus
57:13
on him. So I said, do the surgery, do
57:17
whatever you need to do. I I'm going to let the family
57:20
know he's going to have surgery. And my husband was in and out of
57:24
consciousness that day. And it's just by chance, an hour
57:29
before he goes into surgery, he's awake and the most alert
57:33
he's been in the last two days. And he says, am I going to be
57:38
OK? And I went a question mark.
57:41
It's routine surgery. You don't have anything to worry
57:45
about. You're in good hands.
57:48
Promise me. And I said, I promise you,
57:50
you're going to be fine. And in the back of my head, I'm
57:54
going, please, God, don't make a liar out of me.
57:58
And he looks at me and he says, no matter what happens, don't
58:02
change the routine of the kids. Make sure you still focus on
58:08
them. Make sure everything that
58:10
they're doing stays the same. I need them to maintain their
58:14
routine so that they know everything's going to be OK.
58:18
Is it OK? And thank God the surgery was a
58:22
success. But at that point, my mom was an
58:33
ovarian cancer survivor. And the week before this she had
58:39
found out her cancer had come back.
58:43
And it was really hard when she went to chemo for my sisters to
58:47
be in the room with her and stay positive.
58:51
And it was hard for my dad to see her to go through it, but it
58:55
was back. And being that we were in the
58:59
hospital with my husband, her immune system was going to be
59:02
weak going through chemo again. So I wasn't going to be able to
59:07
see her this time around. I was going to have to limit my
59:11
visit because they didn't want me to expose her or my kids,
59:16
expose her to anything. So in a sense, when I needed my
59:21
family the most, I had to figure it out because my mom needed
59:26
them more. And it wasn't until about 6
59:32
months later that I told my kids, oh, it was really bad, I
59:35
just didn't tell you. And my oldest daughters were
59:38
like, how could you not tell us? And I told them because if I had
59:43
told you, I would have had to tell everybody else.
59:47
And I just didn't have the strength to comfort everybody
59:51
else when I needed to be comforted.
59:54
So now when hiccups happen or really bad days or I just feel
1:00:01
like I'm overwhelmed and the world's too much, I think back
1:00:05
and think we got over the hardest time of our lives.
1:00:11
This is nothing compared to what we've been.
1:00:17
Wow, Mariana, I really appreciate you opening up and
1:00:22
excuse me, sharing all that very powerful story and what a great
1:00:27
lesson that you were able to hold onto coming out the other
1:00:30
side of that, right? You know, we all have hard days,
1:00:35
times we feel overwhelmed, like you said.
1:00:37
And for you to have sort of this most incredible reference point
1:00:43
to say, whatever happened today, an upset parent, a child who had
1:00:48
this, an employee who called off it, this, this is nothing I I've
1:00:53
been through. I have climbed far bigger
1:00:55
mountains than this. It it helps to put things into
1:00:58
perspective. So.
1:01:00
It really does. And then the sad thing is I
1:01:03
would pray not everybody has to experience something like that.
1:01:07
But sometimes when you experience things like that, it
1:01:11
really makes you not necessarily stronger, but it puts everything
1:01:16
in perspective and and you know, I tell my kids I've been Ruhao.
1:01:22
I I didn't think I would be able to.
1:01:28
I never thought I was strong, but I I'm a lot stronger than
1:01:34
what I think I. And I think that's another
1:01:37
important lesson for everybody to hear is that I don't think
1:01:42
any of us give ourselves enough credit for how much inner
1:01:46
strength we have. It's only those moments where
1:01:50
you are pushed beyond what you thought were your limits that
1:01:55
you discover that true inner strength.
1:01:58
You discover a whole new set of limits.
1:02:02
Now, Mariana, I just have one more question for you.
1:02:07
But before I ask it, I want to do a couple of things.
1:02:11
First of all, if you're listening today and you enjoyed
1:02:13
today's content, please hit the like, subscribe or share button.
1:02:18
I also want to let people know the best way to get in touch
1:02:20
with you. Mariana, what would that be?
1:02:23
Somebody's listening and looking for a child care center.
1:02:25
They just, they love your story. They want to connect with you.
1:02:30
E-mail A-Z learning@livelive.com.
1:02:34
And everybody the two is the the the numeral 2.
1:02:37
Don't spell it out. Yeah, eight.
1:02:40
Say it again then. A.
1:02:42
The number 2, the letter Z learning@live.com.
1:02:47
Great. So last question I have for you,
1:02:49
Mariana is I'm curious how you see the child care industry near
1:02:54
you evolving in the next 5 years.
1:02:57
What do you think the big changes are that are coming?
1:03:00
I'm actually scared for it, I really am.
1:03:04
I see a lot more school districts taking in younger and
1:03:09
younger children and some of these kids do not need a large
1:03:16
environments like that. I think they need a smaller one
1:03:21
just because we need more one-on-one with children,
1:03:28
one-on-one that I know some of these families are not able to
1:03:31
provide for their kids. I know here in the state of
1:03:36
Texas, if we want to be part of this subsidized care program
1:03:42
here, you have to be a Texas Rising Star facility, which
1:03:48
means they hold us to, of course, a higher caliber.
1:03:52
Unfortunately, a lot of facilities that are what we call
1:03:58
mom and pop shops like myself don't want to do it or don't
1:04:04
have the means to do it. So there are already programs in
1:04:07
my community directly around me that are closing their doors.
1:04:14
And it makes it scary because now we're being pushed back to
1:04:20
having a friend, a neighbor, a grandparent, an aunt or uncle
1:04:25
watch the children. And I'm not saying that that's a
1:04:28
bad thing because I was that friend in my home watching
1:04:34
children. The thing is, I've learned in
1:04:38
the last 22 years that the minute a baby is born, you now
1:04:44
have this little human being who you can start teaching at.
1:04:51
You know, a couple of hours old babies will mimic you if you
1:04:55
open your mouth, open and close, open and close.
1:04:58
Eventually they do start mimicking your your actions.
1:05:02
If you blink your eyes tight and you open them up, they're babies
1:05:08
that will mimic you. So we can start teaching them
1:05:11
from the very beginning, but knowing how to do that, how to
1:05:16
draw, you know, and hit every teachable moment out there and
1:05:22
making it fun and making it positive and setting the
1:05:28
foundation for them to be ready to be in elementary school.
1:05:34
You need to know how to do that. And in 22 years, I'm still
1:05:38
learning right now I, I will tell you, I always kid with my
1:05:44
kids and tell them I'm Mary Poppins.
1:05:47
I'm practically perfect in everything I do.
1:05:51
But the practically part means that I'm still learning and I
1:05:55
still have to be open to learning.
1:05:58
And I think that's the most important thing is yes, you can,
1:06:03
you know, be caring for a child in your home.
1:06:07
But do you know what to target, if you know what to focus?
1:06:12
Because let's face it, we're in a very scary time right now.
1:06:18
My daughter's a senior in high school, and I'm grateful that
1:06:22
she's a senior in high school because every day that I send
1:06:26
her to school, I pray she comes back to me.
1:06:30
I pray something traumatic doesn't happen at her school.
1:06:33
I pray that something bad doesn't happen in our city, in
1:06:38
our country, in the world every day because of all the school,
1:06:43
you know, incidents that happen. And these kids not only have to
1:06:49
be ready to learn, but they have to be ready for me in case of a
1:06:57
traumatic situation happens. Yeah.
1:07:00
It's one thing to practice a fire drill.
1:07:03
It's another thing to practice an active shooter.
1:07:07
And that's what we're sending our kids to now.
1:07:10
We need to help these children not only have a foundation and
1:07:15
be prepared to learn, but be strong enough to know what to do
1:07:23
and who to trust and where to go and how to react in case
1:07:27
something traumatic does happen. Marianna, I want to be the first
1:07:33
to thank you for sharing both your time and your very powerful
1:07:36
story with us today. I really appreciate it.
1:07:39
Thank you. Folks, that's a wrap on another
1:07:42
episode of the Inspired Stories podcast.
1:07:44
Thanks for learning with us today.