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What It Actually Takes to Feel Like Yourself Again · This Daring Adventure

• 0:03
  Welcome to This Daring Adventure Podcast, where we work on bridging the gap between where we are and where we want to be in order to live a bigger and bolder life.
• 0:14
  In this podcast, we will provide inspiration, tips, and skills you need to make your life the adventure you want it to be.
• 0:22
  Here's your host, mindset mentor and life coach, Trista Guertin.
• 0:34
  Trista: Hey, everybody.
• 0:35
  Trista: Welcome to This Daring Adventure.
• 0:37
  Trista: So my own adventure this week included food poisoning.
• 0:42
  Trista: I got sick a week ago, last Thursday, and landed up sick Thursday night, Friday, Saturday.
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  Trista: I've never quite experienced anything quite like that before, and I'm still in shock about how sick I became.
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  Trista: I'm not quite sure what it was that set me off, and I'm kinda glad that I don't know.
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  Trista: But here I am.
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  Trista: I had my first full meal yesterday, finally, after all those days, and feeling pretty good today.
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  Trista: Much better.
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  Trista: All right, so new episode, what it actually takes to feel like yourself again.
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  Trista: And most women think feeling like themselves again requires a big change, maybe a new job, a new body, a new relationship, a new schedule, thinking that something has to shift on the outside before they can feel better on
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  Trista: the inside.
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  Trista: But that's not actually how it works.
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  Trista: The real reason you feel lost is not your circumstances.
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  Trista: It is never your circumstances.
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  Trista: It is the thoughts you are believing.
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  Trista: Think about it.
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  Trista: You can have everything you said you wanted and still feel checked out.
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  Trista: You can have a good marriage, good kids, good health, good money, good job, and wake up thinking, "Who is this person living my life?"
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  Trista: That is because your feelings come from your thoughts, not from what is happening around you We see this all the time with famous people, right?
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  Trista: They have all the money, all the fame, all the perks, all the glory.
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  Trista: They're still unhappy, right?
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  Trista: There are all these stories all the time about people having everything they've ever wanted, but still being miserable, landing up numbing themselves, buffering, So what does it actually take to feel like yourself again?
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  Trista: It takes three things.
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  Trista: First is you have to be willing to see what you're thinking.
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  Trista: Not what you wish you were thinking, not what you think you should be thinking, but what you're actually thinking.
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  Trista: Most of us are walking around with a low-grade noise in our heads, "I'm too much.
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  Trista: I'm not enough.
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  Trista: I should be further along.
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  Trista: I shouldn't feel this way.
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  Trista: Something is wrong with me."
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  Trista: And you have to get those thoughts out of your head and onto paper.
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  Trista: Now, call this what you will, a thought dump, thought download.
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  Trista: Whatever it is, it is a very simple and powerful tool.
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  Trista: If you take a couple of minutes, three minutes, 10 minutes, just write down everything your brain is saying.
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  Trista: Don't edit it, don't censor it, don't judge it, just get it all out.
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  Trista: Just let it go.
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  Trista: Because you cannot change a thought you cannot see Once you're done with that, just put it all on paper.
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  Trista: You can tear it up, you can throw it out.
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  Trista: You don't have to show it to anybody It's yours?
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  Trista: But it's the act of writing it out and the release that is the main exercise here.
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  Trista: Second, you have to stop believing every thought you have.
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  Trista: Listen, our brain offers us up to 60,000 thoughts per day.
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  Trista: But just because you think something doesn't make it true, and it certainly doesn't make it helpful A thought is just a sentence in your mind.
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  Trista: That is it, and most sentences running through our minds are optional, and they're not helpful, and we have repeated them over and over and over again.
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  Trista: When you think, "I have lost myself," you will feel hopeless.
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  Trista: When you feel hopeless, you stop trying.
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  Trista: You wanna lie on the couch and watch Netflix.
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  Trista: And when you stop trying, you do less of the things that make you feel like you, and then you have more evidence that you have lost yourself, and you feel worse, and the pattern begins again.
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  Trista: The thought creates the feeling.
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  Trista: The feeling drives the action.
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  Trista: The action creates the result.
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  Trista: That is what we're working with.
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  Trista: So the question is not, "How do I fix my life?"
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  Trista: The question is, "What am I thinking that is making me feel this way?"
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  Trista: Identify the thought.
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  Trista: Just having that awareness starts to help you shift.
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  Trista: Third, you have to practice a new thought on purpose.
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  Trista: You do not have to change your whole life to feel better.
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  Trista: You do not have to change your circumstances.
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  Trista: The circumstances are not gonna make you feel better.
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  Trista: You need to change one thought at a time.
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  Trista: Pick one thought that is making you feel lost.
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  Trista: Maybe it is, "I don't know who I am anymore."
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  Trista: Maybe it is, "I have nothing left for myself."
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  Trista: Maybe it is, "It's too late for me."
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  Trista: Then ask yourself, "What else could I think here?"
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  Trista: Not a thought you have to force yourself to believe, but just a thought that is available, that feels a little bit better, that moves you towards feeling better.
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  Trista: "I'm still figuring it out."
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  Trista: "I'm allowed to want more."
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  Trista: "I'm learning who I am now."
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  Trista: What a great thought that is.
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  Trista: "I am learning who I am now."
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  Trista: These are latter thoughts.
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  Trista: They're not fake positivity.
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  Trista: We're not going all the way to rainbows and daisies.
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  Trista: They are thoughts you can actually believe that move you in the direction you wanna go.
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  Trista: Listen, feeling like yourself again is a skill, but it is not a personality trait.
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  Trista: It is not something you either have or you don't.
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  Trista: It is something you have to practice.
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  Trista: You have to do the work.
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  Trista: So here's what I want you to do this week.
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  Trista: Write down your thoughts.
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  Trista: Dump them all out on a piece of paper.
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  Trista: Get everything out of your head.
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  Trista: Then pick one thought that is making you feel checked out.
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  Trista: Go through them.
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  Trista: Take a look Now, you want to separate it from the facts of your life.
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  Trista: The facts are something you can prove in a court of law, not the drama that your brain is adding.
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  Trista: The facts.
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  Trista: Maybe you've lost your job.
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  Trista: Maybe you haven't found a job.
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  Trista: Maybe you are divorced The fact is you are divorced.
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  Trista: The drama is that you're gonna be unhappy for the rest of your life.
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  Trista: That's just drama.
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  Trista: That's not a fact.
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  Trista: So take a look at your thought, separate it from dr- the drama.
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  Trista: Then take a look at that thought and ask yourself what feeling it creates and what action that feeling drives, you'll see what result that action is giving you Then pick a new thought, something that feels a little bit
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  Trista: better.
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  Trista: "I am learning who I am now.
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  Trista: I am still figuring it out.
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  Trista: It might not be too late for me.
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  Trista: I might be right on time."
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  Trista: Practice it in the morning, practice it during the day, practice it before going to bed.
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  Trista: Put it on your phone, put it on a sticky note.
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  Trista: Lately I've been writing notes to myself on the mirror with soap.
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  Trista: I like it.
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  Trista: It works.
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  Trista: I like to see it there in the morning when I wake up.
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  Trista: But that is the work, and that is what it actually takes.
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  Trista: Little by little, every day you start shifting yourself.
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  Trista: You make those shifts, you start to have a different energy, you start to show up differently, you start taking different action And you move yourself forward.
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  Trista: And that, my friend, is how you start to feel like yourself again Not by believing every thought that your brain is offering you If you want help with this, book a consultation with me.
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  Trista: We will go through this step by step together, and we'll go deep.
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  Trista: The link is in the show notes.
• 9:44
  Trista: You are not broken.
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  Trista: You are not lost.
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  Trista: There's nothing wrong with you.
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  Trista: You are just thinking thoughts that do not feel like you anymore, and that is something you can change, and you don't have to do this by yourself.
• 9:59
  Trista: Thanks for listening, everybody.
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  Trista: I'll talk to you next time.
• 10:02
  Trista: Bye.