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Wendigos / The Experiment · The Danger Zoo

0:02
Password accepted. Welcome to the Danger Zoo.
0:07
Welcome back everyone to the Department of anomalous and non
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human Genetic entities, Reconnaissance and Zoological Co
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operations. I am Coyote, your game warden.
0:16
We are in episode 3 of Wendigo's.
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Please God make it end this episode.
0:21
Please. What has happened the last
0:27
episode? I thought he showed up.
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Hey, thought a, how's it going, girl?
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He came flat in this batch and then he kicked in the door, left
0:35
it open and took a severed arm. Found some cool stuff on the
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dead ginger doctor and Hazy found some cool dead stuff on
0:43
the Asian doctor and then they wrestled an unconscious woman.
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Found some cool stuff, I got injected with some cool stuff.
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Well, that was the episode before, yes.
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That's what she said. Nope, she didn't.
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And then you guys heard something crazy on the radio and
1:02
you thought I was in trouble and so you came out to check on me.
1:05
And then Hazy set off AC4, but it hurt the Wendigo.
1:08
And then you guys got entangled with the Wendigo, and the
1:10
Wendigo died. Yeah, fuck that Wendigo.
1:14
And I ran up and I lit up a flare and I said everybody get
1:17
inside, get inside, go. And everyone ran back inside.
1:20
And that is where we are, gentlemen, was handed.
1:23
What's up? So what now?
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Do I have a bazooka? No, sure, don't.
1:30
Do I have a bazooka? No, then you close range freaks
1:33
get a bazooka. Wait, what kind of goggles did I
1:37
have again? You have thermal goggles.
1:39
Thermal imaging goggles, OK. That's right, you have thermal
1:42
imaging goggles. OK, I'm going to go out of this
1:45
room to where that hallway is and go towards the back door and
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just kind of like cover the back door while everybody's figuring
1:52
out what they're doing. He's taking the back door
1:55
always. Step on the ginger.
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Step on the ginger on the way by.
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So you, so you're going back in the hall, all right, going
2:01
through the hallway to the back door.
2:02
Just make sure you step on, all right?
2:05
Yeah, I'm sure. I post up right there and make
2:06
sure, can I do like a check, make sure everything's like
2:11
secure, I guess. Sure, go ahead.
2:14
You see 12. You see that the door is shut
2:17
and there's a bunch of shit barricaded up against it.
2:20
Sweet, I'm just gonna yell back. We good.
2:23
Is the front door no longer in his distance?
2:27
Is there a front door still? No, that remember the baby bird
2:30
here destroyed it with AC4. This is a gaping hole.
2:33
Like you know what your mom has? Yeah.
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OK, that was kind of unnecessary and mean.
2:41
My bad. I'm going to go ahead and this
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big dining room table here, I'm going to set it up right here as
2:50
a sort of barricade. OK, you grab that table, you
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barricade it up and I'm just standing there going, what are
2:57
we doing? What are you guys doing?
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We're getting. Ready to fend off the alphabet
3:02
boys? There's a bunch of gay people
3:05
out there. I'm not going to answer, I'm
3:07
going to play C4 on the inside of the table.
3:10
What the fuck? Wait, well, who are we fighting
3:14
again? The feds, right?
3:15
The feds. The feds.
3:18
The Federales. Are these not federal agents?
3:22
Are what Federal agents? The Wendigos.
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We already got the Wendigos. We killed him.
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Am I the only one that sees this?
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I see it. See what?
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The other three. I see the one that we laid down.
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Yeah, I only see the one we laid down.
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I see the other 3. As Baby Bird and Thoddy discuss
3:47
how they see those 3 wendigos on the outside, they slowly
3:54
dissipate into nothingness. And I'm just looking at both of
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you like you guys are all right. I'm scared.
4:01
No. Wait, whoa, whoa, whoa.
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There was other ones than the one we just killed.
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I didn't see any, Hazy didn't see any, just you 2.
4:11
Let's just move past that. Are we still barricading?
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I'm going to put the gun in my mouth and start screaming at you
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guys saying I'm not crazy. All right, give me a hold on.
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Give me an intimidation check. 18.
4:30
You have thoroughly freaked out. Thought he and I were like whoa,
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whoa, whoa, whoa, big guy, big guy, put it down.
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Everything is cool. I pull out a pack of Starbursts
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out of my pocket, like come on, candy.
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And I shake it at you a little bit.
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Do you want some sugar? My eyes are wide, I'm screaming,
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jewels flying out of my mouth, down the barrel.
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Why is this the beginning of the episode?
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Holy shit dude. All I heard was you guys
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screaming over the radio that you were in danger and you
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needed help so I came running. What the fuck is going on?
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Can I do a grapple attack? On me or baby bird?
5:09
To subdue him and get the OK. Yeah, yeah.
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Give, give me a. Grapple check, Grapple master.
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Put a put a little bit of spice on that because this is a
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dangerous situation. Come on, you guys.
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He just sit back and say what's going on.
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He's just in the hallway just listening.
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He's like, man, this sound like the wrestling in there.
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I got AI, got a 19 with all my modifiers.
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OK baby bird, give me an athletics check.
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I'm squarely I wrote a 17 and my athletics is 3, so that's 20.
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What the fuck? You have a three strength.
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Yeah, OK. I pulled the gun out of my mouth
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and I show you that there is nothing in the chamber.
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There's no such thing as an unloaded gun.
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What the? Fuck, First off, I slap you.
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Let me get a. Let me check for that real
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quick. I use all my bullets.
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I got a Nat 20. I slapped the dog shit out of
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you. Causing the gun to go off.
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Goes off and we just, we hear. The female doctor the other room
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just scream again and hit the ground one more time.
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Oh shit, I forgot about that girl.
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I I thought it wasn't loaded you're.
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Clearly wrong. Anyways, what the fuck is going
6:35
on here? I'm going to run into the
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through the hallway now and I'm going to just jump up in the air
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and elbow drop both of them. Baby Bird and I.
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Whoever's grappling and making a ruckus.
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Oh thoddy and baby bird. I heard a ruckus so I just go
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towards it and elbow drop it. Give me an athletics check.
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Oh, that should be fine with the 0 modifier.
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Let's see. Everybody give me an athletics
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check. Oh, a 4A14. 6.
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I'm about to be Rey Mysterio for a second 11.
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OK, he comes in and he just 316 just fuck takes both of you out
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up against the table. All of a sudden I pull out my 9
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mil at silence and I fire two shots in the air and it doesn't
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have the effect I thought it would because I have a silencer
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on it and I'm fucking dumb. But it does get your attention
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'cause you just hear a little. I'm just going to say ELE
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everybody, love everybody. Everybody chill the fuck out.
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What is happening? Where's the doctor?
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Did the Wendigo just knocked twice?
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No, no, no it certainly did not. I go into the back hallway and
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then I go into the back room where the doctor is and I slap
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her awake. Fuck.
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I slap her away because she wakes up and starts freaking out
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and then I hit her to calm her down and that fails even more.
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She bites my hand and I take fuck.
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I take 4 points of damage due to a hand wipe from this idiot.
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That's what she get. She bit really hard.
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All right, well, just me and her fight now.
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So all right, 14 bam, I knock her unconscious.
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Again. So you accomplish nothing.
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Oh. God, apparently, holy shit.
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All right, I'm coming. I'm, I go through the whole way
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back to the main room and I'm like, fuck that.
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What is wrong with her? Why does she have two bullet
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wounds? Oh yeah, she's crazy.
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We didn't tell you. Yeah, we killed her.
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Her friends, I guess they started it.
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You must have hit her when you shot those two desk pops
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earlier. The ones that popped directly
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into the air. Yeah, they curved.
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God damn, I knew I fucking like James McAvoy too much.
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Shut the fuck up, I don't need your pity laps.
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Anyways, I move the fucking table out here.
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I'm like what the fuck is going on with you guys?
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And I pull out a flashlight as I head towards the front entrance.
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I'm going to go check some shit out.
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Oh. Miss a big man.
9:09
No, don't do it. Don't do it, I scream.
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No, no. All right, I'm outside.
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There's fucking nothing out here.
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I'm just looking my, I've got that super high-powered LED
9:21
flashlight. I'm just looking around.
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I don't see anything. I'm going to run behind you and
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grab on your back and peek around your shoulder because I'm
9:28
scared. All right, you're, I'm
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backpacking baby bird and I'm like, what are you doing well?
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I'm going to go outside too because everybody else is going
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and I need a cigarette probably. All right, yeah, no smoking
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indoors. So Hazy comes out here to the
9:43
side, takes a cigarette break. Audie, what are you doing?
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I'm jumping on baby Bird's back. Oh my God.
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You're going to break my spine. I think it's fair for a coyote
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to do a strength check at this. Point I am doing a strength
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check and that one everybody falls God.
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Damn. It not me and my little smoker's
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circle over here. Everyone falls.
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My back hurts now, and now I am moving at half speed.
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Thank you. Fuck heads.
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Get off of me. All right?
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This I show. I show you guys around the
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flashlights. Nobody's fucking here.
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I hand out flashlights to everyone.
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Here you go. Here you go.
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Here you go. OK sweet, I'm going to go
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towards The Cave. I turn on my thermal imaging
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goggles and I look around. I want to investigate.
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OK, thoughty what are you doing again?
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I want to navigate to this rock pile over here.
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So you you head West to the rock pile.
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I'm right behind you because I just look past at the I look at
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the campfire and I see a bunch of papers just on fire.
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And I was like, I hope that wasn't important.
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No, for sure. No, I look good.
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I saw them do that on purpose. They were like, you know, fuck
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that trash. I guess I'm just going to like
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circle around the house like this way.
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Yeah, clockwise around the house.
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OK, You're just checking that out.
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Yeah. No, no, not that far.
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No, no, no, not halfway. I'm trying to stay with y'all so
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you should go by right there. You're by the back door.
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OK, Big Bird, what are you doing?
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I am investigating where I saw the wendigos OK with my thermal
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imaging goggles. Give me survival perception
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check. 14 Survival is 1. 15 total with modifiers.
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Yeah, 15. All right, as you were looking
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around, do you see the tracks from where the one went to go
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snuck up from the West side? What's Sir?
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Sorry, it's. Already went W, not E I'm dumb.
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Yeah, he came from the West side here.
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You see his tracks and you see your guys tracks and you see my
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tracks where I ran out. But that's it.
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You don't see any other tracks out here.
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I start hyperventilating. You're obviously lying.
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OK, well I'm going to tell Thadi I'm going to go check out the
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fucking cave. Did you guys find anything yet?
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I'm going with you. OK, we make it to the entrance
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of The Cave. I'm going to say I haven't seen
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shit and kind of follow you the long way.
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Baby bear, what are you doing? Fucking stay here if you want.
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I'm going to stand at the edge of The Cave while you guys go
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in. All right, you're going to stand
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over here at the edge of The Cave, so maybe birds outside
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here in the entrance, because if you look at the compass N is
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that way. So we come in here, boop boop,
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and I'm in front here. Nice walk in and I go holy fuck
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that's a lot of skeletons. Is this this dog right here just
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below the pentagram? Oh, I don't know.
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Go investigate. Giant mole, OK.
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I go investigate. I'm going to say not today
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demons, and get the fuck out of this cave.
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Hazy leaves The Cave because stands out there, no.
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I'm just like, just like. All right, Daddy, what are you
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doing? Fucking investigating that damn
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body. What that body doing without
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blood Enough. Yeah, Just give me a survival
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check. 7. Looks like a big dog.
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OK, can I grab that knife off of it?
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You want to touch the knife? This knife here.
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You know, I don't want to touch the knife anymore.
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Up too late, you touch the knife.
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You pick up this knife and you look at it and it starts to glow
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and as soon as that happens the walls start to glow red and a
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weird red glowing force field and it permeates on the outside
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and grabs baby bird and throws him towards the centre of the
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room. Oh no.
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Hell yeah. And now it seems like there's
13:59
something blocking or exit. But now you got a cool knife.
14:02
That's cute. Cool.
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I do got a cool knife now. I want to jump in the middle of
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the circle like Doctor Satan. You run up there to jump in the
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middle of the circle. Oh, I guess I didn't describe
14:15
this room to the listeners. We walked in.
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There's this big cave with bones scattered everywhere, a big
14:19
pantogram in the middle, and along the walls are a bunch of
14:23
symbols written on the wall. Baby, give me a perception check
14:27
real quick at disadvantage because you're being thrown into
14:30
the room. Oh.
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That's a one. OK, you look at the stuff on the
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walls, but it's going by so fast.
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You go, those look weird. Boom and you hit the ground.
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I'm looking around at the wall and I no whammy, no whammy 2.
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I look at it and I go, man, I wish I'd fucking studied Chinese
14:53
in high school. I don't understand none of this
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stuff. That's racist.
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You said there's a perception check.
15:00
Yeah, I mean, it was a perception check for him.
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It was a lore check for me. It'll be a lore check for you as
15:05
well. OK so I'm actually from this
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cave so I can can I get a + 2? Oh shit.
15:12
You are fucking not from this cave.
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You just look like a troglodyte. What's a statue in the middle?
15:25
Was a 15 get me? Oh, you look at it and you go
15:29
baby bird. Isn't this like the weird
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symbols that were on that paper you saw earlier that was on the
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soon to be dead female doctor's paperwork?
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Hold on. Oh yeah.
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Totally. He's thinking, he's thinking.
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The the. Answer is yes, baby bird.
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Hold on, hold on. Take that, bell.
15:50
You don't have the PayPal, you get the paper out then.
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See. Hold on, hold on.
15:57
No Puerto le Resto Jesus. Oh, you're doing Spanish?
16:02
English translate? Fuck, shut the fuck up.
16:05
I am. It takes me a while.
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Yeah. All right.
16:08
So yes, this is the stuff. And as it's going, we look at
16:11
the walls and we start to get kind of a headache.
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So I'm I stopped looking at the wall.
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There's AB and C. OK, well, I mean, I, I, I guess
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I'm going to go towards the entrance and see what's trapping
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us in here. All right, you head South Doo
16:29
Doo Doo Doo to the entrance or east if you're looking at the
16:31
map weird and you're here. What do you want to do to this
16:36
red see through veil shield looking thingy?
16:42
Very supernatural. Star Trekky looking force field
16:45
around the entrance. Can I lick it?
16:50
Absolutely can give me a luck roll.
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Okie dokie, a Christmas. Story style.
16:55
I can dig it. Just stick your tongue to it.
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Oh, brother a 19. That's it, 19, OK.
17:04
What do you mean? That's it, yeah.
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You still did. You lick it and it just kind of
17:09
pushes you back like 5 feet and you just sit up and you're like,
17:12
the walls taste like strawberries.
17:15
These Schnauz berries taste like Schnauz berries.
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Well, if it tastes like Schnauz berries, I don't want to taste
17:22
it. When you licked it, you did
17:24
notice like there was no give to it.
17:26
That is a sturdy wall. Guys, I think we got a puzzle on
17:30
our hands and we're cooked because we're all retarded.
17:34
Big facts. Can I go feel up on the statue
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over here? Sure.
17:40
You go over here, you feel, oh, this statue is not that big.
17:42
That's just so you can see. It's actually like it's a little
17:45
totem. It's like that big.
17:47
Oh yeah, I want to go play with a little totem.
17:49
What's up, guy? You got to touch that.
17:51
Give me a look check. Oh shit.
17:55
For the listeners, this cave is just a big round cave with the
17:58
pentagram in the middle. Like looks like a sacrificial
18:00
altar that's got a little totem on it.
18:03
So like a Dome? Your mom's a Dome.
18:06
Hey. It's 17 + 320 all right.
18:11
Sweet, that's really lucky actually.
18:13
You go to touch that thing and it radiates a little bit of
18:18
power, but then you see on this wall to the West drawings of
18:25
what looks like 5 people, one over the middle.
18:28
Looks real fucked up. Yeah, that kind of looks like
18:32
you. Yeah, that's not cool, asshole.
18:35
The. One with the big airs, Yeah.
18:38
Hey suck my anyways. How big is this little statue
18:44
thing? Do I take it with me?
18:46
It fits in your hand. It is an guanquian totem that
18:50
looks like a Wendigo that it's been carved out of human bone.
18:54
Hell yeah, I want to show that off to the kids, so put that in
18:57
my pocket. Hell yeah.
19:00
All right, you put that in your pocket and it starts to heat up.
19:05
I mean, to the point of, you know, hotter than like a pizza
19:09
sitting on your lap on the way home.
19:10
Or is this something I can't deal with?
19:12
It's about like that you can deal with the pizza.
19:14
OK. In your hand it feels, you know,
19:17
it feels moderately light, but when you put it in your pocket,
19:21
a heaviness comes over you and it really feels like the weight
19:25
of the world is on your shoulders now.
19:28
Well, you know me, I'm a, I'm a fidgeter, so I'm going to
19:30
instantly grab it again. So let's just go ahead and keep
19:32
it in my hand, in my pocket. You go to grab it in your pocket
19:36
and you can no longer feel it in your pocket.
19:38
You, you feel it like on your leg, like you feel it in your
19:41
pocket, but when your hand goes in there, there's nothing.
19:45
Hell yeah. Oh, you lost the totem you
19:48
retard. I'm I'm going to keep that to
19:50
myself and just keep on trucking.
19:53
All right, I walk up here and I go.
19:56
What happened to that little statue thing?
19:58
What's that? What are you talking about bro?
20:03
That's no one's precious in general, but I feel like we
20:08
should just move on. OK.
20:11
I'm going to walk into the middle of the pentagram and put
20:13
my hands on my hips but spread my feet to like a little wider
20:18
than my shoulder and take a power stance while facing Fadi.
20:22
Oh. And now I'm going to be like,
20:26
hey, hey, you should take that knife and like touch the force
20:30
field with it, you know? Oh no.
20:33
I look at them and I go. I don't speak Mexican.
20:37
But you won't do it. He says you should stab the
20:39
force field with that knife. Bet you all do it.
20:42
OK, only because only because a normal person told me to.
20:45
I'm going to do it. I'm.
20:47
The Mexican? What the fuck?
20:51
Yeah, bro, yeah. Touched it.
20:53
You get up, you walk back over there you go to stab it with a
20:55
knife and roll. ADC will saving.
20:59
I didn't say nothing about no stabbing, I just said touch it.
21:03
Oh, are you touch? Are you touching it?
21:04
Are you stabbing it? Thoughty Why would you?
21:06
Stab, I'm stabbing that bitch. All right, so stab it, give me a
21:14
strength check with that and then give me ADC will saving
21:19
throw. OK, I got an 18 for the stab.
21:23
All right. I'm scared.
21:27
Yeah, I bet you are. You listen to Baby Bird of all
21:31
people. Is there like any sort of like
21:35
GM favour I can call in or? Nope, you've never.
21:40
You haven't been able to give me smooches.
21:42
You got no favours in the bank, buddy boy.
21:44
Whoa. Well, I I got I got a one.
21:47
Need to get some more likes? Earn Earn them kisses.
21:51
You got a one? Holy shit you take oh you lucky
21:57
duck out of AD 12 you take 3 points of damage.
22:02
Hell yeah. You're also thrown back to the
22:05
centre of the room. When you stabbed at that thing,
22:11
you dropped a knife but it blew you back.
22:14
As you're trying to get up, you look over here at the wall where
22:17
those weird people drawings are and you see the outlines of all
22:21
of them glow slightly. They like, flicker and then they
22:24
dim back out. It's totally normal, right?
22:28
OK, sure. Hey, stab me in the leg.
22:33
OK, can I go investigate? Said Wall.
22:36
Sure. Hey, if we get blood, if we get
22:38
my blood on the pentagram, who knows what might happen?
22:45
That's sweet. Oh well.
22:47
Hey I just got a Nat 20. You got a Nat 20?
22:51
Are you shitting my Dick right now?
22:55
EW. So you actually touch the one
23:00
guy with glasses, You touch him with your hand?
23:04
Where? Where do I touch him?
23:06
That's weird. You just put your hand on there.
23:10
You're like feeling for like a hidden switch maybe.
23:13
But when you put your hand on there, you got a little bit of
23:15
dirt on your hand and his drawing sizzles and fades away,
23:21
and so does the dirt that you placed on it.
23:23
So now you don't see the guy with the glasses.
23:25
You just see the other four people.
23:27
Is that a good thing or a bad thing?
23:29
I'm glad you asked that. What's your passive perception?
23:33
It's your wisdom. Wait everyone, what's your
23:35
passive perception? 0. 0.
23:40
Zero. It's 0 + 10, so it's 10 for
23:42
everybody except for me. Wait, wait, perception.
23:47
No, I have a one. MMM, so Baby Bear and I both see
23:53
that when he does that that we notice the force field flickers
23:57
as well. It still goes right back up to
24:00
like full strength looking, but it it did flicker.
24:02
So all right, so getting rid of these pictures has something to
24:05
do with the puzzle I assume? Hell yeah.
24:08
So do we just have to throw? I'm gonna grab a handful of dirt
24:11
and throw it at the wall. Yeah, do we need to throw dirt
24:15
at the wall or? OK, give me a athletics check.
24:19
19 Of course they only roll good for shit like this.
24:23
All right, you throw dirt and it hits the guy on the left with
24:26
the beard. Make ADC saving throw a will
24:31
saving throw. Oh my God, 6.
24:37
All right, so you take two points of damage, but not only
24:40
that, hazy, you start to feel kind of fucking sick and you
24:44
take two points of damage. Motherfucker.
24:47
What? I'm going to walk up to the
24:50
picture of the woman. Oh no.
24:55
And then I'm going to touch her forehead.
24:59
Aw. Give me a luck check. 18 Wait,
25:06
do I have a modifier? Is there a modifier for luck?
25:08
Yeah, it's your charisma. Oh yeah, OK.
25:10
Charisma, Charisma, Charisma, charisma.
25:14
I rolled a 18, so that's a 17. So you're actually miss touching
25:22
her and you just touch the wall and nothing happens.
25:25
You ain't special. Now that's lucky.
25:29
You missed touching a drawing on a wall.
25:34
So we got two of them down right.
25:36
You got one of them down. Only one?
25:38
I thought the dirt got one of them.
25:40
The dirt got the first one, yeah.
25:42
No, I got the first one because I walked up and touched it.
25:45
Yeah, that was the first one. That's the dirt 1.
25:47
You got dirt on your hands. I see what you're saying.
25:50
OK, I got you. My bad.
25:51
And. Then he he threw dirt at a
25:52
different 1 and it hurt him and you got hurt and then baby bird
25:57
went and tried to touch one but failed.
26:01
Because he ain't got no dirt on his hands, right?
26:05
Maybe we should just, like, start chucking dirt at these
26:08
fools. He did that already and it
26:10
didn't work. That's how you got hurt.
26:12
Yeah, that's how I got hurt. You said he got, oh, he got
26:15
hurt. I got you.
26:16
I got you. You got hurt from it too.
26:18
Misunderstood what you were saying.
26:20
Bye, bye, go ahead. There's a puzzle here.
26:23
Really. I'm like holy shit.
26:25
Does anybody have any notes or any audio recorders or fucking
26:29
anything from any of the doctors?
26:31
Somebody has the audio recorder? Oh wait, don't I have an audio
26:35
recorder? You have an audio recorder, yes.
26:38
I'd like to listen to that audio recorder please.
26:41
Sure, you also have a notebook and you have the beacon that you
26:44
take off his wrist for some fucking reason.
26:46
Hey, can I, can I walk away from said recorder?
26:50
Because I kind of felt weird last time that everybody was
26:53
doing that. You didn't feel weird, thought
26:56
he felt weird. Oh well, I, I remember, I
26:58
remember that. OK, Yeah, you can.
27:01
I mean, you can. I mean, you're away from here
27:02
against the wall, OK? He's over here.
27:04
OK. Yeah, you got to listen to the
27:06
recorder. And what you hear is and then
27:24
the recording stops and everyone takes everyone.
27:29
Give me ADC will save. Everyone except for Hazy that
27:32
purposely walked away from said thing, right?
27:35
Nope, Everybody fuck. Oh, 19, let's go.
27:38
Nice. I got a three.
27:41
Oh no. Oh, I got a 18.
27:44
OK, baby bird and I take one point of damage.
27:47
Ow, like all right, cool, recorders out.
27:50
Fuck that thing. Does anybody have anything else?
27:53
OK, I look you in the eye and I say I feel like you have a big
27:58
peen. It's possible.
28:02
Only the supernaturals know. I'm sorry.
28:07
Are you jerking off the ghosts? Are you fucking dead people?
28:11
Like what? Judge my life, I.
28:13
Have a notebook also I would like to investigate I guess.
28:18
Cool. What does your notebook say?
28:21
I don't know, I have weird shit popping up on my screen.
28:23
That was about to say, what the hell?
28:24
What the fuck, Kevin? It's probably what's written in
28:28
your notebook. Oh, Markiplier, are you kidding
28:34
me? What does it say about
28:35
Markiplier? Korean male glasses strong frame
28:44
are you gay Showed advanced resistance to the
28:49
transformation. Extreme headaches.
28:51
He is an extreme headache. I love Markiplier.
28:54
You watch your mouth. Crushed by falling stone during
28:57
cave collapse Quake 3. OK, that's kind of funny.
29:00
Quake 3 is a fun game. No, no earthquake.
29:04
It's referencing an earthquake Markiplier.
29:06
Quake 3 is a pretty fun game. Markiplier is the character that
29:10
disappeared when Hazy accidentally put dirt on him.
29:14
That looks nothing like Markiplier.
29:18
He's Korean. If anything, the one in the
29:21
middle looks like Markiplier. That's Chad.
29:25
Wait a minute. The only reason we know that's
29:27
Markiplier is because he has glasses.
29:29
He doesn't wear glasses anymore though.
29:31
Shut. It's not the Markiplier, It's a
29:34
Markiplier. There's tons of them all over
29:36
the place there. There isn't.
29:37
There's only one. There are a bunch of half
29:40
Korean, half white Markipliers from Ohio.
29:43
You don't know. You don't know.
29:45
Any who. You get so defensive about
29:47
Markiplier. Because I love Mark Emu.
29:50
I feel like each one of these peeps is the wendigos.
29:57
Like I think they're turning into wendigos here.
29:59
And I think since Markiplier disappeared, he's the one we
30:03
killed. But when you say Wendy goat, we
30:05
got the one Wendigo that we saw. Like what the fuck are y'all
30:08
talking about? We there was like three other
30:11
wendigos. Three other wendigos?
30:13
When did that happen? And and don't worry about it.
30:17
You were at the back door in the.
30:19
Last episode. No, I don't quite remember that
30:24
that way, but all right. I only saw the one dead 1 to go.
30:28
How much is he paying you? How much is he paying you?
30:32
Anyways, not sure. All right, let's.
30:38
Let's pull this over here so we can see these just a bit better
30:41
here. Wait, there's a warning?
30:45
What's the warning say? Defacing weakens the tether.
30:49
We learned that from Kevin. I still hear the screaming.
30:53
Oh, Kevin. Kevin White male, full beard,
30:58
short hair. I think when you guys should
31:01
like scratch one of the images. Oh, hold on.
31:07
Which one do you want to scratch well?
31:09
I'm not there so well you. Want one of us?
31:12
Yeah, I will not mean you, but no, you know baby bird and and
31:17
hazy because they're there. Yeah, team big backs over here
31:20
baby. Fuck that, scrawny boys, get to
31:23
work. So what do you want us to do?
31:26
This like take like a knife or something, I don't know anything
31:29
your nails and just scratch one of the things.
31:31
No, I ain't got shit. Definitely not in my pocket, in
31:34
my hand. You guys want to use the knife
31:36
that thought he dropped? Yeah, use that because I don't
31:39
have anything in my pocket. Yeah, Hazy.
31:41
Use that. All right, Hazy runs back, grabs
31:44
the knife, comes back here. Which one do you want Hazy to
31:46
scratch with the knife? Oh, Chad.
31:49
Hazy can decide. Obviously it would be.
31:55
Which one? Oh yeah.
31:57
Come come on dude. Ched.
32:01
Dude, I'm gonna be like, hey, let me read over this, you know,
32:05
'cause I, you know, second check my work, all right?
32:09
Subject Lauren, female, strong willed spiritual, volunteered
32:16
for first sigil cut activation. Transformation triggered by the
32:21
ritual dagger Interesting became volatile, speechless, and then
32:29
expired. All right, the other one was
32:33
subject Kevin, white, male, full beard, short hair, struggled
32:36
with the hunger, vocalized regret, asked to see his family.
32:42
Baba help, attempted to flee during blackout breach, Drowned
32:46
in the Creek. Lego bitch.
32:49
And then the other one was subject Chad.
32:52
Long hair, large ears, surpassed all marrow resistance.
32:56
High adaptability escaped during the blackout.
32:59
Suspected full transformation. Let me go with Lauren, the chick
33:06
with the hair. God I hate Lauren.
33:10
I hate Lauren too. Oh, you're going to Lauren.
33:13
Why are you going to Lauren? This is the notes transformation
33:18
triggered by the ritual dagger. Oh, she volunteered first.
33:26
She became volatile, speechless, and then exploded.
33:31
Oh, expired. I heard volatile, speechless and
33:35
exploded and I was like, ah, it's my wife.
33:39
All. Right.
33:40
What are you doing, Hazy? I mean, I guess scratching that
33:44
girl up, I don't know, you guys told me to scratch her up.
33:47
All right, do a melee check. Oh, a fucking melee check.
33:51
That's always going to be fun. That's strength, yeah, which I
33:55
don't think you have any of. Nope, and that was an 11.
33:58
Oh, you go to scratch her and we hear a rumble, or sorry, we feel
34:06
a rumble just. I do have a luck check on the
34:10
evil right I. Mean.
34:12
Yeah, sure. Begin.
34:14
But as you scratch her with the knife, her drawing lights up and
34:19
then fades, and we also watch the shield flicker again.
34:24
Man I'm 2 and O baby what what the fuck are y'all doing?
34:27
Amazing. Good job, brother.
34:29
We figured out the puzzle. Just keep going, keep going.
34:33
We. We.
34:35
Just yeah, just keep going. See how?
34:38
This turn into teamwork real quick.
34:40
We. I'm going to go sit down at the.
34:43
No, no. No, keep going.
34:45
Keep going. I've already got my pay so I'm
34:47
going to go sit down like over at the interest.
34:49
No, no, no. You're the intern.
34:50
You're the intern. So you so you go hangover by the
34:53
all right. Yeah, y'all figure dudes, figure
34:55
dudes. OK Lucas white male, long hair,
34:58
quiet, obedient, first undergo marrow bonding trial, withstood
35:04
it for three days, eaten alive by Chad during phase two breach.
35:09
Oh. You got to eat his Dick.
35:12
The fuck? But you all do it.
35:15
All right, it's your turn, baby bird.
35:17
You you scratch one of them. Yeah, I guess I'll scratch
35:20
Lucas. Oh, did Hazy leave the knife?
35:23
I'll. I'll just Chuck it over there.
35:27
Oh, don't Chuck it. Don't.
35:29
Oh no, give me an acrobatics check.
35:32
That's going to be terrible, too.
35:33
That's strengthening. For both of you.
35:35
Sons of bitches. OK.
35:37
Acrobat Acrobatics is Dex. My dexterity is a 2. 2.
35:42
Two, I rolled a 13. I got AI, got a six, so
35:46
hopefully it doesn't hit anybody.
35:48
Or do I got a 13? You throw the knife and it gets
35:52
to here, nowhere near Baby Bird. He just stares at you, shaking
35:56
his head. Bye bye bro.
35:59
I walk over the knife and I pick it up.
36:02
All right, there you go. Much better plan.
36:04
I did my best. And then I walk back towards
36:07
Lucas. Which one's Lucas?
36:10
Hold on, hold on. White male, long hair.
36:14
This freak in the middle here. Quiet.
36:17
Obedient. OK.
36:19
Oh, the one that towers over everybody else in the picture,
36:22
that's. I didn't think that was Lucas.
36:26
Oh, Chad is the one with large ears.
36:30
You're going after Chad? So Mark Markiplier was the one
36:36
on the left here, and then Lauren was over here.
36:39
So now we got the middle one and the two on the ends.
36:42
OK, we'll go. We'll go with the middle one.
36:45
All right, give me strength check.
36:48
Strength OK 16. OK cool, cool, cool.
36:54
Now give me ADC. Will check.
36:56
Oh. It's always good.
36:58
Back 18. 18 OK, you're fine. Hazy.
37:03
You take one point of damage. Such a bitches.
37:07
I love this. This is awesome, I'm having so
37:11
much fun. Good, I'm glad this took me a
37:13
while to put together. I'm perplexed.
37:16
I put on my thermal imaging goggles and look at the picture.
37:19
OK, cool thermal imaging goggles.
37:24
You look around and you look at Kevin the weird with the full
37:28
beard one and you notice where his rock is.
37:30
It's just, you know what? Give me a perception check play.
37:33
You got those thermal gobbles on, baby girl?
37:36
11. His rock drawing looks drier
37:42
than everyone else's. I get rock hard and I scratch
37:46
him. You scratch it All right, Give
37:50
me a strength check. 11 What the fuck?
37:54
Give me ADC wheel save. Oh my God.
37:58
Three. Oh.
38:00
You and Hazy both take two points of damage.
38:02
Sons of bitches, I. Should try helping help.
38:07
No, apparently I need to get away from y'all because y'all
38:10
are the instigators of my pain. Help me.
38:15
And I do not appreciate this. What's your HP?
38:19
I said what, 1/2 right? 124 now for HP from just this.
38:27
I don't remember what it was for the rest of the time.
38:30
Let's say we took a small rest before we came over here and
38:32
everyone's back to full HP. You took a smoke break.
38:36
That's what it is. It's not small rest breaks.
38:38
We take smoke breaks in this group.
38:40
Well, I got plenty of HPI, don't even worry about that.
38:42
All right, so I guess I'm going to get pissed because.
38:49
Anymore. Can I make a guess of why I'm
38:51
taking damage? Because you only got 6 HP left,
38:54
or 7 HP. Yeah, you can take.
38:56
Yeah. Take a guess, man.
38:57
Fucking no, no, I don't care. I like to solve the puzzle.
39:02
Out of my pocket. I'm going to take that thing out
39:03
of my pocket and smash that shit on the ground because obviously
39:06
that's. Oh, you can't.
39:08
You can't remember. You put your hand in there and
39:10
it's not there. Oh, you slide bashing.
39:14
But but to answer your question, you're wrong.
39:17
Bullshit. OK.
39:19
But it's a good guess though. One second man.
39:24
One second, let me come to terms of this.
39:26
No I have I I just exited out of my Internet so I don't have
39:31
anything help I. Mean you're still on the
39:34
Internet. Oh, you mean the whole?
39:35
Thing yeah, I can't I can't see anything so I'm just like
39:38
talking on my eyes right now all.
39:40
Right, I get super upset about this and I walk over here and I
39:43
go you heard my friends fuck you and I spit on Kevin.
39:50
But Dooley. Well, what happens?
39:53
And I miss I, I hit the wall next to him and I'm like fuck,
39:56
fuck you Kevin, I got it too. OK, I take the knife and scratch
40:04
Chad. OK, you go over which one's
40:08
Chad? Far right.
40:11
Long hair, large ears. OK, you go to scratch, Chad.
40:17
Leave Chad alone. Do a strength check and ADC will
40:20
check. 20 for the strength check.
40:25
Nice. And that 20.
40:27
No dirty 20. Oh, OK.
40:31
And 16 for the wheelchair. OK, nothing happens to you,
40:35
Hazy. You take 4 points of damage.
40:38
Oh fuck me. Sweet, So that's seven points of
40:41
damage I'm taking. This makes me even more mad that
40:44
this is hurting my friends and I spit again on Kevin.
40:50
Oh, thank God. Fuck you, Kevin.
40:52
The water hits Kevin's drawing and he sparks up and he fades
40:59
and the veil also just glitches a couple times.
41:04
I put on my thermal imaging goggles and crank it to the Max.
41:09
OK, so Kevin and Markiplier and Lauren are gone.
41:11
We just got Chad and Lucas. So this is this is Kevin.
41:17
Yeah. OK.
41:19
Hey Coyote, what's your charisma?
41:23
It's not good, I tell you that. Who has the highest charisma out
41:27
of all of this? Probably.
41:28
Probably me by far. Hazy, can you please ask Lucas
41:32
very nicely to cease to exist? Seriously, trust me.
41:37
Just trust. So OK, I'm going to trust since
41:41
I've already done everything else, I'm going to walk to Lucas
41:46
and ask him politely. Hey bro, what the fuck is your
41:48
problem? Why don't you just like, go
41:50
somewhere? Give me a luck check.
41:53
All right, well, I'm going to be totally honest with you too, so
41:58
let's see. It's not going to be good, boys.
42:02
Where was that? My luck, which would be
42:07
charisma. So A5.
42:11
OK, you say. You tell Lucas what you want to
42:15
say, and a piece of rock falls from Lucas and it smacks you in
42:18
the eye, giving you one point of damage.
42:19
Nice. You're going to die in this
42:23
cave. And I'm just getting hit by
42:26
everybody else's bullshit. This was crazy.
42:29
OK do you have above a 0 for charisma?
42:33
No, I know me and baby bird have -1.
42:39
I got a 0. I got a three.
42:41
Why are you trying to look this up?
42:43
I'm going to go over here and sit my ass back down to where I
42:46
was over here just taking damage for no reason.
42:48
No, no, no, no. You have the highest charisma.
42:50
You have the highest charisma. You're the best chance of Lucas
42:53
going away. Are you going to try again?
42:56
No, honestly, hey, can I actually do do what I wanted to
42:59
do? Which which did you want?
43:02
To do B, take that little voodoo doll thing and throw it in the
43:05
middle of this. Sure, you got to reach in your
43:07
pocket and it's not there. Oh fuck, I forgot.
43:10
Let me just walk in there, there with the doll.
43:13
Why don't you do your reroll for luck with Lucas?
43:16
You get that one reroll per session.
43:19
Oh, that's true. It's true too.
43:21
I'm leading so fucking hard in this game.
43:23
There's no fucking, there's no fucking no, there's no fucking
43:25
way. I just roll the two again.
43:27
So edit I'm going to roll again. Sure.
43:29
Oh fucking 5 and 8. Has that helped me any?
43:33
And eight, a bigger rock falls and.
43:37
You take 4 points of damage. Instead of that one, you're at
43:43
what, 3 now I'm. Using the raw dice, but.
43:48
Do again, Yeah. No, this time I was.
43:51
This time I was using the raw dice and I've noticed, but how
43:55
much damage does that take? Wait, you were you?
43:57
You weren't using AD 20. No, I was not.
44:00
Didn't give me AD 20 roll. There we go.
44:03
With your charisma all. Right, Oh my God, this game
44:06
hates me. So it's still, it's still, it's
44:08
still a fucking eight. I rolled A5 and it's still an 8
44:12
so. Fuck me, I'm going to re roll
44:13
I'm going to re roll the damage. So you're going to take OK, you
44:16
only take three points of damage.
44:18
So you're down till 4 now. Holy fuck me I'm.
44:21
Going to go sit my ass back at the fucking issue.
44:25
All right, fuck it. I'm going to come up to Lucas
44:28
and I'm going to be like, hey, you or actually fuck this.
44:31
You're dealing with Lucas. A lot of parts falling from him.
44:33
I go over here and I go. What you doing, thuddy?
44:37
What to me? Well, I'm thinking since Lucas
44:41
is obedient, if we just ask nicely enough, we'll just leave.
44:45
Maybe. Hey, I really want somebody else
44:48
to reach in my pocket and get this fucking doll.
44:51
Is that a thing? I don't know what doll you're
44:53
talking about. I don't.
44:54
Know what he's talking about? I didn't see any doll.
44:57
How does it feel? How does it feel?
45:02
No, anyways, I go that guy right there, that was a friend of mine
45:06
actually when I was in the Vale. Chad, pretty good dude.
45:10
He worked for them for like a long time so I hope he's doing
45:14
all right. Well, I guess not because it
45:16
says he looks like he got transformed.
45:18
That what it says. Surpassed Albemaro resistance,
45:21
High adaptability, escaped during blackout.
45:23
Suspected full transformation. Was that the Wendigo you guys
45:25
fucking killed? I thought we killed Markiplier.
45:29
I'm pretty sure that was the one to go.
45:30
We killed because we only killed 1 and you guys keep saying that
45:33
there aren't any other ones. He goes.
45:35
I definitely saw him. I definitely saw him.
45:36
I don't know what you guys are thinking.
45:37
I'm a liar. I saw him too.
45:40
Well, I get super upset that my friend's dead and I take my gun
45:43
and I I shoot this Chad, this drawing of my dead friend.
45:47
Hold on. Oh sweet.
45:51
And as soon as I shoot it, bang, he fires up.
45:56
And then he sizzles out too. So that only leaves one more,
46:00
right? That just leaves.
46:02
Only drawing here is Lucas. You know, well, I'm just saying
46:08
I got something in my front pocket for anybody that wants to
46:12
like be curious. Just try to reach in there a
46:14
little. Bit I'm a little bi curious.
46:17
I'm not falling for that trick again.
46:19
I'm not playing pocket pool with you, dude.
46:21
No, I went to high school. I'm not playing this game.
46:26
So now we're all in front of Lucas, the main big creepy ghost
46:29
fucking thing. Oh fuck it, here comes y'all's
46:32
hero. Let me, let me try.
46:34
Hold on, hold on, hold on. Before you roll, before you
46:36
roll. I want to try something.
46:39
I want to get into a battle stance and if a rock falls off
46:45
of Lucas towards Hazy, I'm going to punch it out of the air and
46:48
save his life. OK, defensive stance is what you
46:53
could have said. Everybody's standing right here.
46:56
Everybody give me a luck check right now.
46:58
A luck check. 14. 1715. Wait my my modifier is 13?
47:09
As Hazy's looking at it, a piece of rock falls and thought he
47:13
punches it, Bang knocks it out. However, another piece falls
47:18
right in the baby bird's mouth and he accidentally he swallows
47:21
it. And when he swallows it, Lucas
47:25
fires up and disappears, and then the aura slowly lifts away.
47:30
That doesn't make any. Fucking sense.
47:33
Why does my stomach hurt so much?
47:36
You swallowed Lucas essence. That's a bit weird.
47:41
The the one guy that drowned got water on him, he disappeared.
47:43
The one guy that got eaten, you guys accidentally ate him, he
47:46
disappeared. The girl that got stabbed, you
47:47
scratched her, she disappeared. Chad, who got shot in real life,
47:51
we shot him and he disappeared. And the other guy?
47:54
Who had? A quake fall on him.
47:56
God damn dude, I licked so hard and everyone of you horses
48:00
didn't want to drink that goddamn water.
48:04
Would have asking Lucas to leave worked if he rolled high enough?
48:08
I would have given it to him if he rolled a Nat 20.
48:11
Oh, so what's the whole purpose having obedient there then?
48:16
I said I would have let him do it if he rolled a Nat 28.
48:19
That's just a description of him.
48:20
Not everything is going to be a part of the puzzle.
48:22
You got to safe route the bullshit brother.
48:25
No. All right, let's get the I'm.
48:34
I'm fucking gone. This place is done.
48:35
I'm I'm leaving. I'm going to go back to that
48:38
stupid scientist. I'm going to grab her and I'm
48:40
going to load her up in the van. We're going to take her back to
48:42
the hideout. I said we say fuck her like we
48:45
have to take her. She's not doing easy with
48:47
screaming and getting knocked out.
48:49
Oh, you mean like that? I put her in the back of the
48:52
van. Yes, I took her and I put her in
48:55
the van and I bandaged her up. Hold on.
48:57
How did the bandaging go? Let's see, All right.
49:00
I tried to banish her. She freaked out on me again.
49:02
She punched me out and I'm leaving this I I left her ass
49:05
there. She went nowhere.
49:08
Dude, that's someone called for. Try to tell y'all.
49:11
Dude, were they like this the whole time?
49:13
They just like constantly combatted to you guys.
49:15
What the fuck, man? They just attacked us for no
49:18
reason. They were really cool in the
49:20
encryption emails. What the fuck?
49:22
Yeah, we, like knocked on the door and they were like, get out
49:24
of here. And I was like, OK, I tried to
49:26
leave and then the fight started.
49:29
That's weird, they were super cool when I worked at the veil.
49:31
I don't understand why they were acting like that.
49:32
It was because of the three other Wendigo's, yeah.
49:35
I don't either. We we should.
49:36
Yeah, we should leave. OK, calm down my guy.
49:40
I'm gonna be honest, I scanned multiple times.
49:42
I only saw the one Wendigo. That was it.
49:44
Hey did I not did I not burn anything at the campsite or did
49:47
I burn a? Whole lot of shit.
49:48
Did I burn everything? You burned so much.
49:51
Can we do one last little investigation?
49:54
Sure, give me a luck check. 9. OK.
50:01
I'm going to put on my thermal imaging goggles for the last
50:04
time and look into the forest. OK, you give me a left check
50:08
too. 19 -, 118. OK, all right.
50:14
You're looking around. You don't see anything, but you
50:15
hear the snow cats start up. So you run and jump in.
50:18
Hazy's two preoccupied, looking through the soot to hear the
50:20
snow cats start to roll out down the road.
50:24
You just hear Coyote ask, is everybody in the back?
50:27
Are we good? Yep, Yep.
50:29
Everyone's here. Hey.
50:31
Fuck no. And we just keep rolling.
50:34
I thought he comes running down the trail after us.
50:38
That's it. That's episode today.
50:39
Everyone join us next time where we show you our cool hideout and
50:43
we talk about powers. Because as we left here,
50:45
everyone felt kind of weird. Hazy felt really weird, thought
50:50
he felt a little weird. I think I got food poisoning
50:53
from the The Cave rock. I'm having to chase y'all down
50:55
in the vehicle and shoot at y'all for y'all's attention.
51:00
Fuck we. We left Pretty Kitty in the bed
51:02
for God Pretty Kitty. We turn around, we come back and
51:05
get pretty Kitty. Throw him in there.
51:08
Hazy you can get into I. Guess you can get into but
51:11
still, fuck that one chick. Yeah, fuck her crazy.
51:15
Anyways, we're out. We'll see y'all next time.
51:17
Bye, we should have. Got the Wendigo body for the,
51:21
you know, the fur or whatever the hell they have on it.
51:23
Obviously no fur whatsoever. Mission complete.
51:29
Target neutralized.