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Matthew 5:31-32 · Providence Baptist Church - Sermons

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Our text for today is Matthew chapter 5 verses 31 and 32.
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As has been said a number of times now, it's a difficult text.
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! And it's a difficult text because, as we look at the larger teaching on marriage, divorce and remarriage in the Bible, the waters can get a little bit muddy.
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And it's a difficult text because almost all of us have been affected by divorce in one way or another.
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And so it's a very real, present issue for us.
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At the end of July 2014, in our verse-by-verse study of Mark's Gospel,
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we came to some of Jesus' teaching on divorce and remarriage in Mark chapter 10 verses 1 through 12.
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At that time, I presented two widely accepted conservative views.
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And I framed them as, number one, the more permissive view.
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And number two, the more restrictive view, often called the permanence view.
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But I did not settle for you or for myself, quite frankly, which view we ought to hold as a church.
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And I suggested that we needed to settle the matter as a church.
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That it was a weighty enough issue that we should, in fact, work through it.
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It is astounding to me that it has been four years, almost to date.
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In fact, last Sunday would have been four years to the date since we first stated the need for a formal position on the matter.
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Many churches, we've discovered, have no formal position on this at all.
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But as we saw the need for it, four years have passed by already.
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Initially, my fervency for the issue was derailed by simple schedule conflicts that made it absolutely impossible.
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I wrote seemingly impossible.
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It was impossible for our elders to gather that fall of 2014.
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And then life happened.
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Everything else in our world just kept on moving on.
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And we didn't get to time out everything else going on in our personal lives and in the life of the church to study the matter.
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Since then, we've preached through the rest of Mark, Colossians, Ecclesiastes.
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I'm pretty sure the book of Jonah, the parable of the prodigal son, and the book of Acts.
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We've begun new ministry efforts like training for the Center for Biblical Counseling and the ABBA initiative,
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our foster care and adoption initiative.
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We have sent out new ministry partners.
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For example, the Zwimpkes to Germany and Oseama Obele to Brazil.
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We've said goodbye to many people.
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Our dearest of brothers, Sid, went home to be with the Lord, and we grieved that loss together.
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We said goodbye to Wes and Liz.
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As I mentioned earlier, Wes was an elder of our church and music leader,
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and we've worked through the labor, the effort of replacing all of the work that both of them did for our church.
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We have done lots of premarital counseling and officiated numerous weddings.
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I think 15 in the past four years.
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And praise the Lord, we've had a lot of babies.
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My family included, which definitely made for a tough year for our family personally.
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Silas is now two years old.
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So, life moved on, and the situation got shelved.
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Not forgotten, but shelved.
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And so, I am once again grateful for our general habit as a church of verse-by-verse exposition of God's Word.
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As in God's good design, we've been brought to the topic of marriage, divorce, and remarriage once again.
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And I will tell you, to just be entirely honest, I would have loved just to have skipped these two verses for now.
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If you're paying attention, you know I've delayed them a little bit.
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We've done a few things topically over the past couple of weeks.
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I want to, right now at the outset, just burst the bubble of anticipation for you this morning.
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I do not intend to settle the matter today.
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I appreciate the prayers that you guys have had on my behalf, both prior to and this morning as well.
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Even this week, I had every intention of sorting out every detail.
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To be honest, I'm not sure I could even preach a reasonably-length sermon to cover all of the massive amount of information that ought to be covered.
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I had really hoped, but I have yet, despite an incredible number of hours of prayerful study,
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to sort out all of the complexities of the matter.
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If you find that you have a confident position on divorce and remarriage,
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you have either, A, made assumptions based on how you have heard the matter taught,
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you just grew up believing a certain thing about marriage, divorce, and remarriage,
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and so you're just assuming, and it may be the right teaching, but you're assuming that it's right.
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Or you've not spent nearly enough time in reading broadly, reading opposing arguments,
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hearing all of the many interpretations of the many texts that speak to the matter.
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Or you are much more brilliant than I am, which is a distinct possibility.
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I want to be clear.
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I don't dare think myself the most brilliant amongst us.
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Or you have spent considerable time on the matter,
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carefully weighing out the teaching and varied interpretations,
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and have arrived at a position.
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And if this is the case for you, I would ask that you would come speak with me.
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I find myself in this process, and your input would be most welcome.
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So we're not going to sort it all out this morning.
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I do hope that you can appreciate my desire not to be brash on this topic.
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It has real application for today.
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And I think we should be careful about the lines that we draw concerning it.
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I believe that the consequences are too dire to take an issue like this lightly.
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I also hope that you can sense this morning my earnest longing
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to lead our truth, our church in truth and love,
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and not to divorce the two.
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Pun intended.
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What I promise is that from this date forth,
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we will not settle this issue in a matter of years,
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but rather in a matter of months.
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I intend, and you can be praying for me,
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to present a position paper to you,
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I hope, in the coming few weeks,
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for your prayerful consideration and conversation,
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and for us to discuss at our next quarterly members meeting,
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which is at the beginning of October, I believe.
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So, we are going to look at today's text,
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and we are going to talk about today's text,
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but we are not going to work out every bit of its possible meaning for us today.
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All the same, let me remind you before I read Matthew 5,
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verses 31 and 32,
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beloved, that this is God's word to us.
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It was written for His glory and our good.
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We would all do well to listen to it in order to believe its promises
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and obey its commands.
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So, I read in verse 31,
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It was also said,
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Whoever divorces his wife,
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let him give her a certificate of divorce.
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But I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife,
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except on the ground of sexual immorality,
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makes her commit adultery,
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and whoever marries a divorced woman,
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commits adultery.
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Now, we are in Jesus' most famous of sermons,
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we commonly call the Sermon on the Mount.
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And recall the two prominent themes of the Sermon on the Mount
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are number one, human flourishing.
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What does it look like to live well as a citizen of God's kingdom?
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And we have seen that the human flourishing that Jesus teaches
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is not the same as the flourishing of the world.
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Jesus says,
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Blessed are those who are poor in spirit,
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and mourn,
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and are meek,
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and hungry,
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and thirsty for righteousness,
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and merciful,
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pure peacemakers.
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Those who are persecuted for righteousness,
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Jesus tells us are flourishing.
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And the second theme that we have seen,
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and really is beginning to pick up some steam now,
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is the theme of whole person righteousness.
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Not merely outward appearance of righteousness,
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but a holiness that indwells us,
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that affects our thoughts,
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and our attitudes,
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and our intentions,
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as well as our actions.
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Jesus has taught us that citizens of his kingdom
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are keepers of the law.
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Not that they gain their citizenship by being keepers of it,
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but that they have been granted citizenship,
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and their keeping of the law evidences their citizenship.
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Right?
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And this law keeping,
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this righteousness,
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is not just this outward thing.
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Right?
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It is a whole person thing.
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This is what Jesus means when he says in Matthew 5,
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in verse 20,
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For I tell you,
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unless your righteousness exceeds that of the scribes and Pharisees,
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you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.
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We spent quite a bit of time looking at the law,
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and going back to Exodus 20,
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and considering all of the implications of the moral law for us.
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So, with this idea in mind,
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Jesus begins to press this point
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by using a series of phrases,
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beginning in Matthew 5,
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verses 21 and 22.
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You see, at the beginning of verse 21,
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he says,
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You have heard that it was said to those of old.
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And then in verse 22,
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But I say to you.
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So, there's this pattern that follows through chapter 5.
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He does this six times through the end of the chapter.
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And what he is doing is correcting the common misinterpretations of the law in his day.
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He is correcting the mere pharisaical outward appearance understanding of these laws.
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And he is showing his listeners then and us now
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how it is that we are to embody the law as citizens of his kingdom.
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And he does this in this pattern.
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You have heard it was said,
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but I say to you.
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He does this six times over.
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So, in Jesus' teaching on marriage, divorce, and remarriage,
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which this is just a snapshot of.
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So, if you have heard me read the text and you've gone,
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that seems incredibly clear.
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Just hang on.
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This is just one of the teachings on it.
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And it gains some complexity, I believe.
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What he's doing is he's correcting something.
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He's bringing a clear understanding to something.
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He begins in verse 31.
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It was also said,
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whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.
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And Jesus here is referring to an interpretation of Deuteronomy 24, verses 1-4.
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The interpretation of Deuteronomy 24, verses 1-4.
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And I want you to hear me.
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I'm going to read it.
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And you can get there quickly if you want to.
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But listen quickly.
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It's a case law issue, Deuteronomy 24,
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which says,
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when a man takes a wife and marries her,
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if she then finds no favor in his eyes because he has found some indecency in her,
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and he writes her a certificate of divorce and puts it in her hand and sends her out of his house,
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and she departs out of his house,
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and if she goes and becomes another man's wife,
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and the latter man hates her and writes her a certificate of divorce
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and puts it in her hand and sends her out of his house,
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or if the latter man dies who took her to be his wife,
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then her former husband, who sent her away,
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may not take her again to be his wife after she has been defiled.
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For that is an abomination before the Lord,
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and you shall not bring sin upon the land that your Lord your God is giving you for an inheritance.
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Okay?
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And so, the Pharisees of the day had interpreted this commandment, right?
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Which is a very specific commandment.
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It's a very specific issue that has taken place,
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and you'll see in some coming months how it applies to the total argument.
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But what we have to recognize at first is what they thought.
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What was it that they had done with these four verses?
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The reigning opinion in the matter was given by a rabbi named Hillel.
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He was the liberal rabbi of the day.
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He had in fact died 20 years before this,
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but all the same, it was his view that prevailed.
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Rabbi Hillel promoted divorce for any reason at all.
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He had said, if your wife burns your dinner, you can divorce her.
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He's also quoted saying, for any reason, unload that woman.
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So, his interpretation was, merely as long as a certificate is given,
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you can divorce for any reason whatsoever,
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which is a pretty fast and loose interpretation of Deuteronomy 24, verses 1 through 4.
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I think that you will agree.
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Later in Matthew, chapter 19, verses 3 through 8,
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we see a similar response by Jesus, but this time he's being tested.
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Verse 3 says,
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And Pharisees came up to him and tested him by asking,
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Who are you going to side with, Jesus, is what they were asking.
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They said, is it lawful to divorce one's wife for any cause, as Hillel had said.
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Jesus answered, this is verse 4,
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Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female,
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and said,
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Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother,
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and hold fast to his wife,
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and the two shall become one flesh.
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So they are no longer two, but one flesh.
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What therefore God has joined together,
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let not man separate.
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They said to him,
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Why then did Moses command one to give a certificate of divorce and to send her away?
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And he said to them,
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Because of your hardness of heart,
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Moses allowed you to divorce your wives.
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But from the beginning,
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it was not so.
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So something that we can be sure of in this text
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is that the reigning opinion of the day
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was that you could divorce your wife or your husband
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for any reason whatsoever,
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just as long as you did it through the legal channels.
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It was no big deal.
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And Jesus' response,
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we can see in Matthew 19,
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very clearly is,
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This is not what God intended for our marriages.
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God designed our marriages to be more permanent than that.
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They are in fact weighty promises that we make to one another when we are married.
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He is correcting this huge misconception.
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And we live in a day much like that.
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Misconceptions needing to be corrected.
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So Jesus goes on to say,
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and we get into some of the more challenging and more troubling words,
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I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife
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except on the grounds of sexual immorality
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makes her commit adultery.
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And whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery.
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And it does not matter which view you hold.
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All of these views make a case
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that you have to understand
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the culture of the day
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and the nature of divorce laws.
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And they make opposing arguments
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using the very same premises,
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which seems like a real moving target.
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It is hard to plant your flag on this one,
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I would contend.
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Again,
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you might be more brilliant than I am
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and be able to pull it off.
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But I've heard the same arguments made
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to support a different view,
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which I think that if you have a premise,
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it should lead to a conclusion.
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So it can be quite frustrating altogether.
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So there are a broad spectrum of views
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concerning divorce and remarriage.
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And clearly some of them are outside of orthodoxy, right?
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Would be like the teaching of Hillel in our day,
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a no-fault divorce teaching
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that you can divorce for any reason,
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you can remarry for any reason,
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it does not matter.
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Certainly as a church,
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we are not on that end of the spectrum
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concerning the issue.
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And I would suggest that there are
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two widely accepted conservative views,
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which I mentioned to you previously,
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and I'll give you some more details about here
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in a moment.
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Previously, I called them
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the more permissive view
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and the more restrictive view.
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And I have found it extremely problematic
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to give these views names.
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No matter what I seem to do,
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one of them gets framed in the positive
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and one in the negative.
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It's a very difficult thing to do.
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Permissive and restrictive, for example.
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You can bring whatever thoughts you have
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to those words.
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Permissive in your mind could be a negative.
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Restrictive in your mind could be a negative.
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As of late, as our church,
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in various formats,
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have been having lots of conversation about this,
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I've been using the titles
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broader view and narrower view.
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I recognize, once again,
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this is problematic.
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Some of you, when you hear the word broad,
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may think of the way that leads to destruction.
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That's not what I mean by it.
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Some of you, when you hear narrow,
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may think of narrow-mindedness.
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And this is not what I mean either by this.
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So, I'm going to use those terms,
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but I recognize that they're problematic terms
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all the same.
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So, a few details about each of these views
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to prime your minds,
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to get you thinking about these issues.
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Number one, the broader view.
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The broader view would say
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that divorce is permitted
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under certain circumstances,
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although there's some fracturing here
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about the particulars of those circumstances.
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Most agree that when a spouse commits adultery,
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is sexually unfaithful in a physical sense,
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that divorce is permissible.
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Or, when a spouse,
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an unbelieving spouse,
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deserts the relationship,
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abandons the relationship,
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this is 1 Corinthians chapter 7,
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that it is permissible,
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and maybe even, some would say,
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commanded that you grant a divorce
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to that person.
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Some contend that when a spouse
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is dangerously abusive,
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has given up on the covenant promises
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that accompany a marriage,
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that that falls in that abandonment clause
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and layers and layers and layers.
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Most who hold this view
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would say that remarriage is permitted
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to the non-offending spouse
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when the divorce has occurred
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for those aforementioned reasons.
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Some would say it's permitted
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with some parameters to any party,
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and it's complex.
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And it's complex.
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That's where I'm at right now.
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Second, the narrower view,
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it's a bit simpler.
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It's an attractive thing about it.
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I would say that divorce is only permitted
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when a believer is married
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to an unbelieving spouse
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who demands a divorce.
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Some who hold this view
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don't agree with that,
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but most do.
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Most would say that 1 Corinthians 7 text
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applies here.
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If you have an unbelieving spouse
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who will not live peaceably with you,
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abandons you,
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demands divorce for the sake of peace,
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it should be granted.
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That's 1 Corinthians 7, 10 through 12,
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I believe.
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They also say in this narrower view
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that remarriage is not permitted
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under any circumstance
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unless it's a reconciliation
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to that spouse
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provided that the spouse
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is still alive.
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So, as I've said,
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it's not a clear-cut, simple issue.
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It's been widely debated.
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It would seem throughout
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the history of the church,
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at least since the Reformation,
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that broader view is held
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by modern pastors
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and scholars like
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John MacArthur
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and Andreas Kostenberger
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as a professor at Southeastern,
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now at Midwestern,
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I just found out.
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This is the most widely held
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evangelical view,
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again,
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with some variances
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within it.
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It's historically held
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by Protestants
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like John Murray
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who wrote a rather fine work on it.
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The Westminster Confession
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of 1647 reads,
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In case of adultery
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after marriage,
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it is lawful
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for the innocent party
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to sue out a divorce
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and after the divorce
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to marry another
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as if the offending party
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were dead.
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So there's some
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veracity of this view held
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both historically
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and presently.
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The narrow view
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is held by modern pastors
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and scholars
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who we love
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like Votie Bauckham
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and John Piper.
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Historically,
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the Baptists of England,
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when they adopted
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the Westminster Confession,
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which then became known
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as the Second London
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Baptist Confession,
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which we are very fond of,
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they omitted
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the previously read paragraph
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from the Westminster Confession.
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They didn't say anything.
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They just took it out.
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So I don't know exactly
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what they thought
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on the matter.
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My guess would be
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that they weren't sure,
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but that there were some,
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at least amongst them,
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that would have debated
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for that narrower view
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and wanted that statement removed,
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and so it was done.
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Either way,
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from our text today,
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we should see that
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Jesus is adding
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great weight
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to marriage.
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In fact,
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in our conversations
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about this,
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I've wanted to express,
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and I think that
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at least most
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who have joined me
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in this
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have done so,
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that we pick up
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a very, very
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heavy weight.
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Marriage,
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when it was designed
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to picture something,
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it's important
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and it matters
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and it accomplishes
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things in our lives,
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and we set that heavy weight
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on the one side
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of the scale
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in this conversation,
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and then we begin
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to talk about
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the possibilities
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for divorce
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and remarriage,
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and we drop
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very little light,
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light weights
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onto the other side
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of that scale,
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right?
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The weight of this one
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crashes,
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right?
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This thing matters
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on this side,
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and then we go
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dink,
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dink,
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dink over here.
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Like,
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we can be clear
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about this,
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right?
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There are some
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non-negotiable things,
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right?
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Some things that we
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cannot and should not,
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and I don't believe
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any of us would want
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to waver on
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as we consider
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this issue,
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and so I want to talk
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about those
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non-negotiables.
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I have five of them
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for you.
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If you were here
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four years ago,
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these are a repetition
27:06
of what we did
27:08
last time
27:09
we talked about
27:10
this matter.
27:12
So five non-negotiables.
27:13
Number one,
27:14
God presided
27:17
over the first marriage
27:19
and every subsequent
27:22
marriage,
27:24
right?
27:24
God created
27:26
the institution
27:27
of marriage
27:28
before He created
27:30
any other
27:30
institution.
27:32
It's the only
27:33
pre-fall institution
27:35
that God
27:36
created,
27:37
and He made it
27:39
very
27:40
good.
27:41
We see this
27:42
in Genesis
27:44
chapter 2,
27:46
and we saw
27:48
from our text
27:48
in Matthew
27:49
chapter 19,
27:50
Jesus quotes
27:51
from Genesis
27:51
2, 24,
27:54
and He goes on
27:54
to say,
27:55
what therefore
27:55
God has joined
27:57
together,
27:58
let not
27:59
man
28:00
separate.
28:03
Marriage
28:03
is a good
28:04
thing,
28:04
and it was
28:05
created for
28:06
our good
28:07
and for
28:07
the glory
28:09
of God.
28:09
So the
28:10
second,
28:11
non-negotiable,
28:13
is that God
28:14
created marriage
28:15
to give us
28:17
a shadow
28:17
of the
28:18
blessed
28:18
relationship
28:20
between Christ
28:21
and the
28:22
church.
28:23
We read about
28:24
this in Ephesians
28:24
chapter 5,
28:26
verses 22
28:27
through 33,
28:29
that Paul
28:30
works out
28:30
for us
28:31
this wonderful,
28:33
profound
28:33
mystery
28:34
that although
28:36
imperfectly,
28:37
our marriages
28:37
are meant
28:38
to display
28:39
this relationship.
28:40
The loving,
28:41
sacrificial
28:42
headship of
28:43
Jesus Christ
28:44
and the
28:45
humble submission
28:46
of the church
28:47
is meant
28:47
to be working
28:48
out in
28:49
our marriages.
28:51
Our marriages
28:52
are meant
28:53
to be holy
28:55
and set apart
28:55
in this way
28:56
for the glory
28:57
of God.
29:00
They're meant
29:00
to show
29:01
something
29:02
that is
29:03
permanent.
29:05
Jesus Christ
29:06
will never
29:07
fail
29:07
the church
29:09
and husbands.
29:10
We fail
29:10
our wives
29:12
so imperfectly
29:13
we display
29:13
this but
29:14
all the same
29:15
it's meant
29:16
to display
29:17
this.
29:19
And for
29:20
these reasons,
29:21
the third
29:22
non-negotiable
29:23
is that
29:26
divorce
29:27
is never
29:28
ideal.
29:32
Even those
29:32
who hold
29:33
that narrower
29:33
view must
29:34
admit that
29:34
it happens
29:35
at times.
29:37
But it
29:37
is never
29:38
ideal.
29:40
Malachi
29:41
chapter 2
29:41
and verse
29:42
16.
29:45
The ESV
29:45
says this,
29:47
for the man
29:47
who does not
29:48
love his wife
29:48
but divorces her
29:49
says the Lord,
29:51
the God of Israel,
29:52
covers his garment
29:53
with violence
29:54
says the Lord
29:55
of hosts.
29:56
So guard
29:57
yourselves
29:57
in your spirit
29:58
and do not
29:59
be faithless.
30:02
Now there's
30:02
some interpretive
30:03
challenges
30:04
in Malachi
30:05
chapter 2
30:06
and verse 16
30:07
and if you
30:07
have an ESV
30:08
you'll see a
30:08
footnote
30:09
concerning this
30:10
particular
30:11
interpretive
30:11
challenge.
30:13
The NASB
30:14
and many
30:15
other,
30:15
I think it's
30:16
actually most
30:16
other translations
30:17
render Malachi
30:19
2.16
30:19
this way.
30:21
Well I'll just
30:21
read you the
30:21
beginning.
30:22
At the beginning
30:23
of Malachi
30:23
2.16
30:24
they translate
30:26
for I hate
30:28
divorce
30:29
says the
30:29
Lord,
30:30
the God
30:31
of Israel.
30:33
God does
30:34
not desire
30:35
or intend
30:36
for any
30:37
of our
30:37
marriages
30:38
to end
30:38
in divorce.
30:40
This is why
30:41
we say
30:41
permanence
30:42
vows
30:42
whatever
30:43
view
30:43
we may
30:44
hold.
30:45
If you've
30:45
ever heard
30:46
me officiate
30:47
a wedding
30:47
we work
30:50
together
30:50
in that
30:51
time
30:52
in front
30:52
of people
30:53
who love
30:53
us
30:54
to make
30:54
huge
30:55
promises
30:56
to one
30:57
another
30:57
and all
30:58
of those
30:58
promises
30:59
are
31:00
until
31:00
death
31:01
do we
31:01
part
31:02
promises.
31:04
Never
31:05
ever
31:05
want
31:06
we
31:06
never
31:07
ever
31:07
desire
31:08
that a
31:10
marriage
31:10
would end
31:10
in divorce.
31:13
Fourth
31:14
non-negotiable
31:15
the marriage
31:18
covenant
31:18
is temporal
31:20
that is
31:22
death
31:23
breaks the
31:24
covenant
31:24
and gives
31:26
a remaining
31:26
spouse
31:27
the ability
31:28
to remarry.
31:29
this is a
31:30
non-negotiable
31:31
Romans chapter
31:31
7 verse 2
31:32
and 3
31:32
Paul writes
31:33
for a married
31:33
woman is bound
31:34
by law to her
31:35
husband while
31:36
he lives
31:36
but if her
31:37
husband dies
31:37
she is released
31:38
from the law
31:39
of marriage
31:39
accordingly
31:40
she will be
31:41
called an
31:41
adulteress
31:42
if she lives
31:42
with another
31:42
man while
31:43
her husband
31:43
is alive
31:44
but if her
31:45
husband dies
31:46
she is free
31:47
from that
31:47
law
31:48
and if she
31:48
marries another
31:49
man
31:49
she is not
31:50
an adulteress.
31:52
we can
31:53
recall
31:54
again
31:54
the Pharisees
31:55
coming to
31:55
test Jesus
31:57
and asking
31:58
about
31:58
multiple
32:00
marriages
32:00
and
32:01
whose
32:02
wife
32:03
who will
32:04
have a
32:04
husband
32:04
and he
32:05
says
32:05
do you
32:05
not
32:06
understand
32:06
this is
32:07
a temporal
32:08
thing
32:08
marriage
32:08
is a
32:09
momentary
32:10
thing
32:10
it's not
32:10
an
32:11
eternal
32:11
thing
32:12
it's
32:13
meant
32:13
for
32:13
the
32:15
life
32:15
of
32:16
covenant
32:17
together
32:17
if a
32:18
spouse
32:18
were to
32:19
pass
32:19
remarriage
32:21
as possible
32:21
and then
32:24
fifth
32:25
the fifth
32:25
non-negotiable
32:27
is that
32:30
divorce
32:30
and or
32:31
remarriage
32:32
after divorce
32:33
is not
32:35
an unpardonable
32:36
sin
32:37
it's not
32:39
an unpardonable
32:40
sin
32:41
and I
32:42
am
32:43
extremely
32:44
grieved
32:45
by how
32:46
many churches
32:47
seem to
32:48
make
32:49
members of
32:50
their
32:51
church
32:51
second
32:52
class
32:53
Christians
32:53
because of
32:55
some
32:55
past
32:56
sin
32:56
in
32:57
their
32:57
life
32:57
the
33:00
only
33:01
unpardonable
33:01
sin
33:01
is the
33:02
sin
33:02
of
33:03
unbelief
33:04
it's
33:04
denying
33:05
the
33:06
conviction
33:06
of
33:07
the
33:07
spirit
33:07
in
33:08
your
33:09
life
33:09
all
33:10
others
33:10
are
33:12
covered
33:12
plentifully
33:13
by the
33:14
blood
33:14
of
33:15
Jesus
33:15
Christ
33:16
both
33:18
views
33:18
either
33:18
way
33:19
hold
33:19
that
33:20
if
33:20
someone
33:20
is
33:20
wrongly
33:21
divorced
33:22
and or
33:22
wrongly
33:23
remarried
33:24
remarried
33:24
that these
33:26
are acts
33:26
of sin
33:27
but not
33:27
perpetually
33:28
not
33:29
perpetual
33:30
sin
33:31
that they
33:32
should be
33:32
confessed
33:33
from the
33:33
past
33:34
and certainly
33:35
avoided
33:35
in the
33:37
future
33:37
but they
33:38
are not
33:39
unforgivable
33:41
!
33:41
and these
33:43
things are
33:43
non-negotiable
33:45
for me
33:47
I believe
33:47
they would
33:48
be for
33:48
you
33:49
I believe
33:49
the cases
33:50
are clearly
33:50
made
33:51
for these
33:52
things
33:52
and so
33:53
hear
33:53
the
33:54
weightiness
33:55
of what
33:56
we believe
33:56
is of
33:57
good
33:57
value
33:58
about
33:58
marriage
33:59
I want
34:03
us to
34:04
settle this
34:04
again
34:05
many churches
34:05
don't
34:06
and my
34:06
assumption
34:07
is that
34:07
the
34:07
churches
34:08
that don't
34:08
have a
34:08
formal
34:08
view
34:09
on this
34:09
merely
34:10
bow to
34:11
the
34:11
pastor's
34:12
personal
34:12
view
34:12
on the
34:13
matter
34:13
he takes
34:15
care of
34:15
all of
34:15
the
34:16
counseling
34:16
he's the
34:17
one that
34:17
has to
34:18
be
34:18
making
34:19
decisions
34:20
on whether
34:20
or not
34:21
he'll
34:21
officiate
34:22
a wedding
34:22
etc
34:23
and so
34:23
they just
34:24
simply
34:24
appeal
34:24
to him
34:26
but
34:27
I believe
34:28
that we
34:29
need to
34:29
as a
34:30
church
34:30
form a
34:31
view on
34:32
this
34:32
in the
34:32
coming
34:32
months
34:33
because
34:33
we
34:34
believe
34:35
in a
34:35
congregational
34:37
church
34:38
polity
34:39
that is
34:40
to say
34:41
we believe
34:41
the bible
34:41
teaches
34:42
that in
34:42
matters
34:42
of
34:43
doctrine
34:44
and
34:45
discipline
34:45
it is
34:46
the
34:46
congregation
34:46
that holds
34:47
the power
34:48
to decide
34:49
these things
34:50
certainly
34:50
given some
34:51
leadership
34:51
from the
34:52
elders
34:53
of the
34:53
church
34:54
but that
34:55
you
34:55
ultimately
34:56
need to
34:57
be part
34:57
of the
34:58
process
34:58
of deciding
34:59
what the
35:00
bible
35:00
teaches
35:00
what view
35:01
we ought
35:02
to hold
35:02
as a
35:03
church
35:03
on this
35:04
matter
35:04
and of
35:04
course
35:04
many
35:05
others
35:06
that
35:08
means
35:08
that
35:08
this
35:08
is a
35:08
responsibility
35:09
that you
35:10
have to
35:10
take
35:11
up
35:11
you
35:13
have
35:13
to
35:13
get
35:13
involved
35:14
in
35:15
looking
35:16
at
35:17
the
35:17
texts
35:17
and
35:18
then
35:18
further
35:19
looking
35:19
at
35:20
the
35:20
cases
35:20
made
35:21
for
35:21
the
35:22
text
35:23
you
35:23
have
35:24
to
35:24
engage
35:24
your
35:25
mind
35:25
in
35:26
prayerfully
35:27
considering
35:28
where
35:28
we
35:29
ought
35:29
to
35:29
land
35:29
on
35:30
this
35:31
I'm
35:32
going
35:32
to
35:32
produce
35:32
I
35:33
promise
35:33
I'm
35:34
not
35:35
looking
35:35
forward
35:35
to
35:35
it
35:35
I
35:35
don't
35:36
esteem
35:36
myself
35:36
a
35:36
very
35:36
good
35:37
writer
35:37
but
35:37
I'm
35:37
going
35:38
to
35:38
produce
35:38
a
35:38
paper
35:38
that
35:40
you'll
35:40
need
35:40
to
35:40
carefully
35:41
consider
35:42
I'm
35:43
going to
35:43
say
35:43
I'm
35:43
proposing
35:44
Doug's
35:45
going to
35:45
join me
35:45
in that
35:46
this is
35:47
what we
35:47
propose
35:48
our
35:48
church
35:48
adopts
35:49
together
35:50
and then
35:50
we're
35:50
going to
35:51
have
35:51
a
35:51
conversation
35:51
about
35:52
it
35:52
and
35:53
I
35:53
don't
35:53
really
35:54
want
35:54
to
35:54
have
35:54
a
35:54
conversation
35:55
with
35:55
a
35:55
bunch
35:55
of
35:55
people
35:55
with
35:56
opinions
35:56
carefully
35:59
!
36:05
dialogue
36:06
about
36:07
the
36:07
matter
36:07
but
36:09
you have
36:09
to
36:09
get
36:09
engaged
36:10
you have
36:10
to
36:10
get
36:10
involved
36:11
and
36:12
we
36:12
have
36:12
to
36:12
decide
36:13
together
36:13
I
36:14
don't
36:14
have
36:14
the
36:14
power
36:15
to
36:15
plant
36:16
my
36:16
flag
36:17
and
36:17
say
36:17
this
36:17
will
36:17
be
36:18
our
36:18
flag
36:19
we need
36:19
to
36:19
do
36:20
this
36:20
together
36:22
secondly
36:23
we need
36:24
to do
36:24
this
36:24
together
36:25
because
36:25
these
36:26
matters
36:26
have
36:26
bearing
36:27
on
36:27
how
36:27
we
36:27
function
36:28
together
36:28
as
36:29
a
36:29
faith
36:29
family
36:30
what
36:31
we
36:31
will
36:31
permit
36:32
or
36:32
not
36:32
permit
36:33
so
36:34
what
36:34
we
36:34
will
36:34
call
36:34
sin
36:35
and
36:35
what
36:35
we
36:35
will
36:35
not
36:35
call
36:36
sin
36:36
there's
36:37
a
36:37
lot
36:38
of
36:38
implication
36:39
to
36:40
deciding
36:41
this
36:42
who
36:42
would
36:42
be
36:43
expected
36:43
to
36:43
repent
36:44
of
36:44
something
36:44
or
36:44
not
36:45
repent
36:45
of
36:45
something
36:45
or
36:46
if
36:46
they're
36:46
unwilling
36:46
to
36:47
repent
36:47
who
36:48
we
36:48
would
36:48
allow
36:49
in
36:49
church
36:50
membership
36:50
or
36:51
put
36:51
out
36:52
of
36:53
church
36:53
membership
36:53
if
36:55
they
36:55
don't
36:55
see
36:55
eye
36:56
to
36:56
eye
36:56
with
36:56
us
36:56
on
36:58
the
36:58
matter
36:58
right
37:00
and
37:00
that
37:01
process
37:01
of
37:02
permitting
37:03
members
37:04
and
37:05
seeing
37:05
members
37:06
out
37:06
communication
37:07
and the
37:08
process
37:08
of
37:08
discipline
37:08
is a
37:09
church
37:10
responsibility
37:11
it's not
37:12
just
37:12
mine
37:13
all of
37:13
the
37:13
difficult
37:13
things
37:14
don't
37:14
just
37:14
land
37:15
in
37:15
my
37:15
lap
37:15
we
37:16
bear
37:16
much
37:17
of
37:18
what
37:18
the
37:18
church
37:18
does
37:18
as
37:19
a
37:19
church
37:19
together
37:20
so
37:22
we
37:22
need
37:22
to
37:22
decide
37:22
it
37:22
together
37:23
third
37:25
we
37:27
must
37:27
contend
37:28
for the
37:28
truth
37:29
in this
37:29
generation
37:29
concerning
37:30
marriage
37:31
we
37:32
need
37:32
to
37:33
carefully
37:33
work
37:35
through
37:35
this
37:35
together
37:36
because
37:36
we
37:37
cannot
37:37
let
37:37
the
37:37
culture
37:37
at
37:38
large
37:38
define
37:38
truth
37:39
for
37:40
us
37:40
and
37:41
we
37:41
must
37:41
serve
37:42
as a
37:42
God
37:43
fearing
37:43
example
37:43
to
37:44
our
37:44
community
37:44
so
37:45
you
37:46
need
37:46
to
37:46
understand
37:46
the
37:46
case
37:47
you
37:48
need
37:48
to
37:48
be
37:49
able
37:49
to
37:49
articulate
37:50
in
37:51
some
37:51
measure
37:52
the
37:52
case
37:53
for
37:54
where
37:54
we
37:54
land
37:55
as
37:55
a
37:55
church
37:55
concerning
37:56
marriage
37:56
divorce
37:57
and
37:58
remarriage
37:58
fourth
38:00
I
38:03
believe
38:03
it's
38:03
going
38:03
to
38:03
be
38:03
good
38:04
for
38:05
us
38:05
to
38:05
go
38:05
through
38:05
this
38:06
process
38:06
together
38:06
because
38:07
it's
38:07
going
38:07
to
38:07
be
38:07
a
38:07
test
38:08
of
38:08
our
38:09
love
38:09
for
38:10
the
38:10
truth
38:10
it's
38:12
going
38:12
to
38:12
press
38:13
us
38:13
as
38:14
it
38:14
has
38:14
me
38:14
I
38:15
cannot
38:15
I
38:16
can't
38:16
express
38:16
to
38:17
you
38:17
in
38:20
unthought
38:20
out
38:21
words
38:21
how
38:22
tied
38:23
up
38:23
in
38:24
knots
38:24
I've
38:24
been
38:24
over
38:25
this
38:25
issue
38:25
I
38:27
believe
38:27
in
38:27
the
38:27
doctrine
38:27
of
38:27
the
38:28
clarity
38:28
of
38:28
scripture
38:28
and
38:29
that's
38:30
shaky
38:30
I
38:30
want
38:31
it
38:31
to
38:31
be
38:31
more
38:31
clear
38:32
on
38:32
this
38:32
matter
38:33
oh
38:34
the
38:34
scribbles
38:35
I
38:35
have
38:35
done
38:36
on
38:36
a
38:36
white
38:36
board
38:37
downstairs
38:37
I
38:38
have
38:38
approached
38:39
this
38:39
thing
38:40
from
38:40
all
38:41
kinds
38:41
of
38:42
angles
38:42
trying
38:42
to
38:43
blank
38:44
slate
38:44
and
38:44
start
38:44
over
38:45
and
38:45
blank
38:45
slate
38:46
and
38:46
start
38:47
over
38:47
it
38:51
will
38:51
I
38:52
think
38:52
if
38:52
taken
38:52
up
38:52
rightly
38:53
help
38:54
us
38:55
to
38:55
better
38:56
love
38:57
the
38:57
scripture
38:57
we
38:58
have
38:59
to
38:59
decide
38:59
things
39:00
and
39:00
these
39:00
things
39:00
have
39:01
implications
39:02
right
39:02
we
39:03
have
39:03
to
39:03
work
39:04
out
39:04
in
39:04
the
39:04
life
39:05
of
39:06
our
39:06
church
39:06
and
39:06
I
39:07
think
39:07
it
39:07
will
39:07
press
39:07
us
39:07
together
39:08
to
39:10
greater
39:10
love
39:11
for
39:12
the
39:12
truth
39:12
of
39:12
the
39:12
Bible
39:12
and
39:14
fifth
39:15
this
39:16
is
39:16
going
39:16
be
39:16
a
39:16
test
39:17
of
39:17
our
39:17
love
39:17
for
39:18
one
39:18
another
39:18
you
39:21
did
39:21
not
39:21
commit
39:22
right
39:22
speaking
39:22
to
39:23
members
39:23
to
39:24
this
39:24
church
39:25
as
39:26
a
39:26
set
39:26
of
39:26
programs
39:28
presentations
39:31
certainly
39:32
not a
39:33
not a
39:33
property
39:34
a
39:36
particular
39:37
position
39:38
on
39:38
something
39:39
but
39:40
as a
39:40
commitment
39:40
to
39:41
a
39:41
people
39:41
people
39:43
who
39:44
love
39:44
the
39:44
truth
39:44
of
39:44
God
39:44
who
39:45
are
39:45
trying
39:46
to
39:46
walk
39:46
together
39:46
in
39:47
the
39:48
truth
39:48
of
39:49
God
39:49
we
39:51
ought
39:51
not
39:51
hurl
39:53
doctrine
39:53
at
39:54
one
39:54
another
39:54
carelessly
39:56
and
39:57
Paul
39:57
writes
39:58
in
39:58
1
39:58
Corinthians
39:58
chapter
39:59
13
40:00
and
40:00
verse
40:00
2
40:00
and
40:01
if
40:01
I
40:01
have
40:02
prophetic
40:03
powers
40:04
and
40:05
understand
40:05
all
40:06
mysteries
40:07
and
40:07
all
40:07
knowledge
40:08
that's
40:08
how
40:08
I
40:08
feel
40:08
right
40:08
now
40:09
about
40:09
this
40:09
particular
40:09
I
40:10
feel
40:10
like
40:11
I
40:11
have
40:11
to
40:11
at
40:12
the
40:12
moment
40:13
and
40:14
if
40:14
I
40:14
have
40:15
all
40:15
faith
40:16
so
40:16
as
40:17
to
40:17
remove
40:17
mountains
40:18
but
40:18
have
40:19
not
40:19
love
40:20
I
40:21
am
40:21
nothing
40:22
and
40:23
Paul
40:23
is not
40:24
here
40:24
minimizing
40:24
!
40:24
the
40:25
truth
40:25
but
40:26
he's
40:26
merely
40:26
saying
40:27
if we
40:27
could
40:27
understand
40:28
everything
40:28
that there
40:29
ever was
40:29
to
40:30
ever
40:30
understand
40:31
and
40:31
none
40:31
of us
40:31
do
40:31
right
40:32
so
40:32
we
40:33
have
40:33
less
40:34
than
40:34
this
40:34
to be
40:35
clear
40:35
but
40:36
we
40:36
have
40:36
not
40:37
love
40:37
if we
40:37
can't
40:37
walk
40:38
together
40:38
in
40:39
love
40:39
and
40:40
the
40:41
truth
40:41
then
40:42
we're
40:42
nothing
40:43
and
40:44
I
40:45
would
40:45
suggest
40:45
that
40:45
since
40:45
we
40:46
know
40:46
so
40:47
much
40:47
less
40:47
than
40:48
all
40:50
the
40:50
prophetic
40:50
powers
40:51
and
40:51
all
40:51
the
40:52
mysteries
40:52
and
40:52
all
40:53
the
40:53
knowledge
40:53
and
40:53
all
40:54
the
40:54
faith
40:54
that
40:54
we
40:54
would
40:54
be
40:55
less
40:55
than
40:56
nothing
40:56
if
40:57
we
40:57
can't
40:58
do
40:58
this
40:59
in
41:00
love
41:00
so
41:03
be
41:03
expecting
41:04
a
41:05
further
41:05
work
41:05
from me
41:06
on
41:06
this
41:07
matter
41:07
up
41:07
until
41:07
late
41:07
last
41:08
night
41:08
I
41:09
had
41:09
intended
41:09
to
41:09
do
41:09
more
41:10
just
41:12
unsettled
41:13
about
41:14
some
41:14
of
41:14
it
41:15
be
41:16
in
41:16
prayer
41:16
for
41:16
me
41:17
and
41:17
for
41:17
our
41:17
church
41:18
begin
41:19
having
41:20
scripturally
41:21
informed
41:21
conversations
41:22
with your
41:22
closest
41:23
relationships
41:24
in our
41:24
church
41:24
and
41:25
then
41:25
have
41:25
conversations
41:26
with
41:26
people
41:27
you
41:27
may
41:27
not
41:27
regularly
41:28
speak
41:28
with
41:29
don't
41:30
get
41:30
into
41:30
an
41:30
echo
41:30
chamber
41:31
talk
41:32
broadly
41:33
where
41:35
are you
41:35
coming
41:35
from
41:35
on
41:35
this
41:36
ask
41:36
that
41:36
question
41:37
of
41:37
people
41:37
you
41:39
will
41:39
be
41:39
asked
41:40
if
41:40
you're
41:40
a
41:40
member
41:40
to
41:41
vote
41:41
on
41:42
a
41:42
document
41:43
in
41:43
some
41:43
coming
41:43
months
41:44
be an
41:45
informed
41:46
voter
41:47
do not
41:49
take your
41:49
responsibility
41:50
as a
41:51
church
41:51
member
41:52
lightly
41:53
in
41:54
!
41:54
in
41:54
the
41:54
meantime
41:55
and
41:55
beyond
41:56
let's
41:57
fight
41:57
for
41:58
marriages
41:58
let's
41:59
fight
42:00
for
42:00
marriages
42:00
many of
42:01
you may
42:02
not
42:02
know
42:02
this
42:02
but
42:02
it's
42:02
it's
42:03
one
42:03
of my
42:03
high
42:03
goals
42:04
as a
42:04
pastor
42:04
to
42:06
never
42:06
officiate
42:06
a
42:07
wedding
42:07
that
42:07
ends
42:07
in
42:07
divorce
42:08
what a
42:09
wonderful
42:09
goal
42:09
that
42:10
would
42:10
be
42:11
if you
42:11
have
42:12
had me
42:13
officiate
42:13
your
42:14
wedding
42:15
you know
42:15
that's
42:15
why we
42:16
do
42:16
six
42:17
long
42:17
sessions
42:17
of
42:18
premarital
42:18
counseling
42:18
I want
42:20
to see
42:21
successful
42:22
marriages
42:22
in our
42:23
church
42:23
I don't
42:25
want to
42:25
have to
42:25
apply
42:26
I don't
42:26
want to
42:26
have to
42:27
apply
42:27
the
42:27
teaching
42:27
on
42:27
divorce
42:28
and
42:28
remarriage
42:28
wouldn't
42:28
it be
42:29
wonderful
42:29
if we
42:29
could
42:29
just
42:30
skate
42:30
through
42:31
and
42:31
never
42:32
have
42:32
these
42:32
issues
42:32
arise
42:33
although
42:34
they
42:34
have
42:34
and
42:34
I'm
42:35
confident
42:35
they
42:35
will
42:36
in
42:37
the
42:37
future
42:38
because
42:39
marriage
42:39
is the
42:40
first
42:40
and
42:41
most
42:42
fundamental
42:42
of
42:44
human
42:44
institutions
42:44
may we
42:46
be a
42:46
church
42:47
full of
42:47
marriages
42:48
that exist
42:49
for the
42:49
glory
42:49
of our
42:51
great
42:51
God
42:51
let's
42:52
pray
42:52
together