Latest / The Wholehearted Enneagram Podcast / Five Steps to Wholehearted Goals for 2024

Transcript

Five Steps to Wholehearted Goals for 2024 · The Wholehearted Enneagram Podcast

0:04
SPEAKER_00: Hey there, I'm Amy Wicks, your guide by the side for your whole-hearted journey.
0:09
SPEAKER_00: And friend, I get it.
0:11
SPEAKER_00: Life can be a whirlwind, juggling family, work, and all the in-betweens.
0:16
SPEAKER_00: As a wife, mom to three teenagers, and building a growing business, I felt the overwhelm, the doubts, and the struggles too.
0:24
SPEAKER_00: But here's the thing: the Lord took my broken-hearted pieces and turned them into a beautiful story of clarity, peace, and joy.
0:32
SPEAKER_00: And now I'm here to help you do the same.
0:35
SPEAKER_00: With years of experience as a certified Enneagram coach, spiritual director, and working genius facilitator, I am here to provide you with practical wisdom and inspiration.
0:46
SPEAKER_00: Through expert interviews and real life examples, you can uncover your strengths, motivations, and God's unwavering love.
0:54
SPEAKER_00: And together, we're gonna explore biblical truths, different personality profiles, and life rhythms that will empower you to break free from anxiety, shame, and frustration.
1:05
SPEAKER_00: I have walked the path, my friend, and I know the challenges you face.
1:10
SPEAKER_00: But that's why I'm here, by your side, cheering you on as you embrace wholehearted living.
1:16
SPEAKER_00: So grab your headphones, invite a friend, and let's embark on this transformative journey together.
1:22
SPEAKER_00: Welcome to Simply Wholehearted, where we laugh, learn, and flourish as a community.
1:32
SPEAKER_00: Hey friend, how did your last year go, as in 2023?
1:38
SPEAKER_00: Was it full of goodness, frivolity, and fun?
1:41
SPEAKER_00: Or maybe there was a lot of heartache, trial, and frustration.
1:45
SPEAKER_00: Of course, most of us would probably raise our hand to it's a little bit of both.
1:50
SPEAKER_00: A little bit of all of the above.
1:53
SPEAKER_00: I know that I experienced a lot of blessing in our home and in my life, but there was also a lot of tough moments that we are still finding our way through.
2:04
SPEAKER_00: Now, when you look back over 2023, can you remember specific details?
2:10
SPEAKER_00: Hmm.
2:10
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, okay.
2:12
SPEAKER_00: Maybe this big thing or that significant moment stands out to you, but maybe the details are a little bit fuzzy.
2:20
SPEAKER_00: Perhaps you just have some vague feelings about the last 12 months, and likely, especially after we're just coming out of the holidays and it's officially the new year, January 2023 can feel like a decade ago, and you might even be pinching yourself going, it's 2024.
2:38
SPEAKER_00: So I want to invite you to my learn process.
2:43
SPEAKER_00: Now, if you've been here a while before, you have heard about my learn reflection guide, something I have done with the community, I've done it in workshops, some live events, I've also talked about it here on the podcast.
2:57
SPEAKER_00: When I looked back over some of my archives, if you will, because there's almost seven years of podcast episodes, which I'm truly laughing at the absurdity.
3:08
SPEAKER_00: I never thought I would have seven years of podcasts so far.
3:11
SPEAKER_00: But all of that to say, when I was looking over my podcast and trying to figure out when is the last time I talked about the learn process?
3:18
SPEAKER_00: It was 2020, as in I recorded it in December 2019 and shared it with you that last week of that year, 2019, before 2020 made its debut.
3:32
SPEAKER_00: And of course, as you and I can remember, those first couple months we were blissfully unaware about all that we would face.
3:40
SPEAKER_00: So as I thought about it, I I decided it was time to reshare some of these lessons because wow, the last few years have been a lot, and this year alone has helped so much.
3:53
SPEAKER_00: And I want to invite you into this process to set the wholehearted goals that are meant for you, that are going to breathe life and life-giving rhythms to your heart, your spirit, your mind, your body, and your home.
4:09
SPEAKER_00: So I know it's not always easy to retrace your year, especially in one sitting, but I think if you go through this process with me, maybe again, if you're new to this, listen to how I'm doing it, and then you can print off the learn guide, and I'll tell you more how you can get that.
4:25
SPEAKER_00: But if you get that guide, you'll be able to go through this process on your own easy peasy.
4:30
SPEAKER_00: Well, I should back up just a little bit.
4:34
SPEAKER_00: This process is an important process and a valuable process.
4:37
SPEAKER_00: And while you can think about the things as we go through and have this conversation about this last year, and I share some of what I learned, you can be thinking about what you learned, things that were similar or something that feels very opposite of what I'm sharing.
4:50
SPEAKER_00: But I want to invite you into the intentionality of the reflection process.
4:54
SPEAKER_00: I think it's important to take time, maybe in the early morning or in the evening after the kids are down with a beverage that makes you feel warm and cozy and good and just helps settle your spirit as you think about the last year.
5:09
SPEAKER_00: Yep, I would love you to have a pen and paper in hand, or at least maybe the keyboard in front of you, so you can type out your thoughts as you go through this process.
5:19
SPEAKER_00: You can, of course, listen to this episode again and again, or like I said, I have a real simple printable that helps you walk through these steps.
5:28
SPEAKER_00: Okay.
5:28
SPEAKER_00: The good news is not only have I broken down this idea of setting wholehearted goals and steps, but it's incredibly simple.
5:36
SPEAKER_00: And you can easily remember it because it's an acrostic that spells out the word learn.
5:41
SPEAKER_00: Yep, L E A R N.
5:44
SPEAKER_00: It's really just a formula for asking intentional questions, not only of yourself, but also it's a really great way to have intentional conversation with others, your kids, your spouse, maybe even your good friends.
5:58
SPEAKER_00: I have shared before a little bit about the story of when I came up with this learn process.
6:03
SPEAKER_00: And honestly, I was surprised when I went back through the archives and realized how long I had been talking about it.
6:10
SPEAKER_00: You know, sometimes these things you just do and you forget, how long have I been doing it?
6:14
SPEAKER_00: It feels forever, but maybe I've only been doing it for a short while.
6:17
SPEAKER_00: But ultimately, the very shortened version of the story of how this learned process came to be is that it was an intentional tool to reflect with the kids about their day of school.
6:28
SPEAKER_00: It gave different ways to ask the same question.
6:31
SPEAKER_00: How was your day?
6:33
SPEAKER_00: It helped get more specific and detailed, and it has fostered so much rich and meaningful conversation.
6:40
SPEAKER_00: I really think that framework even helped me be a better question asker as a mom, as a wife, as a coach, as a friend, all of these different things.
6:48
SPEAKER_00: So ultimately, these questions help answer the question: how was your last year?
6:54
SPEAKER_00: And how do you want to go into this next year?
6:56
SPEAKER_00: There are many ways to do this, and I've learned from different coaches and business owners out there in the world, really amazing processes and reflection.
7:06
SPEAKER_00: And all of them are fantastic.
7:08
SPEAKER_00: What I'm giving you today is just a simplified version of that process.
7:12
SPEAKER_00: So that way you don't feel so overwhelmed.
7:15
SPEAKER_00: And you actually take the time, maybe in stillness, silence, and solitude, to reflect on the year that the Lord has carried you through and take what it is that you want with you into 2024.
7:29
SPEAKER_00: Okay, I am going to go through the learn process here and be listening for the L, the E, the A, the R, the N.
7:38
SPEAKER_00: Remember that spells learn.
7:39
SPEAKER_00: And I'll go through you step by step on my reflection, and then I'll tell you the two steps that I do afterwards to really get clear on what my wholehearted goals are going to be for the next year.
7:52
SPEAKER_00: Oh, and one more thing before I forget to explain it.
7:55
SPEAKER_00: When I go through this process for reflection and for goal setting, I think through three categories as I look at these five different steps.
8:04
SPEAKER_00: I always think through what did I experience in these different categories in my spirit, my mind, and my body.
8:12
SPEAKER_00: Because, you know, we live as a whole person.
8:16
SPEAKER_00: We're supposed to bring all of ourselves, and one is not necessarily more important than another.
8:22
SPEAKER_00: It all goes hand in hand.
8:24
SPEAKER_00: Okay, our first prompt is L for like.
8:29
SPEAKER_00: What did you like about 2023?
8:32
SPEAKER_00: What is the first thing that comes to your mind that you enjoyed?
8:35
SPEAKER_00: What did you do for your body that you liked?
8:38
SPEAKER_00: How about your spirit and your mind?
8:41
SPEAKER_00: As I said, I'm going to share a few of what I took away from 2023, and it might help you remember the things that you've learned along the way.
8:49
SPEAKER_00: So for my spirit, I really liked growing and trust that I do and can hear the Lord's leading.
8:57
SPEAKER_00: That may seem very simplistic, but to be honest, as I continue to unpack my holistic story and think over the 40 plus years of life, I've realized how much I doubt that I do hear the Lord's voice.
9:13
SPEAKER_00: And by Lord's voice, well, it often means just a solid impression of what I'm supposed to do or this idea in my spirit, in my mind, that I know that the Lord is leading me into.
9:24
SPEAKER_00: But because of some of the, hmm, how do I put it, some of the family of origin pain and some of my history, I doubt myself way too easily.
9:35
SPEAKER_00: I should give a little bit more credit to myself that I can be led by the Lord.
9:41
SPEAKER_00: And when I'm making decisions that are in line with the word of God and build up the body of Christ and are for my benefit and ultimately God's glory, well, that is probably what the Lord is leading me to do.
9:56
SPEAKER_00: And so I really like that I have grown in this.
9:58
SPEAKER_00: And part of that is working with a counselor and a coach and being consistent in my time with the Lord every single morning and at several points through the day.
10:07
SPEAKER_00: This is something that I am so grateful that is growing in me.
10:12
SPEAKER_00: Okay, this year I've also realized how much I like solving problems.
10:17
SPEAKER_00: Yes, this is something I'm attributing to what I liked about my mind or what has happened for my mind.
10:24
SPEAKER_00: And this year has really been about learning more about my gifting and the joy of hearing people's problems and then coming up with creative solutions.
10:32
SPEAKER_00: Now, that doesn't always mean that people like my kids, friends, or even clients end up following my advice, but I liked knowing that I gave my best to care for their situation.
10:42
SPEAKER_00: I really enjoyed how much joy it brought me and how much I do like that aspect of being a coach.
10:49
SPEAKER_00: It's been kind of a fun thing to learn about myself or realize in the end.
10:54
SPEAKER_00: Now, one of the things I liked for my body is that I came to a realization that I am actually comfortable in my own skin.
11:02
SPEAKER_00: And it's not because I finally hit a size or weight goal, but because I am confident that I care for my body well, and I'm really doing the best I can considering my stage of life and my age.
11:13
SPEAKER_00: I mean, perhaps someday I'll have goals to push myself to another level of endurance or strength, but for now, my life is beautifully full, and I balance out the time that I can give to exercise with meaningful time with my family, plus the energy to take care of all of their needs.
11:33
SPEAKER_00: So, friend, what did you like about 2023?
11:36
SPEAKER_00: I bet if you give yourself some time to write down one thing that you liked about 2023, you will probably remember a few more.
11:44
SPEAKER_00: And also if you use the categories of spirit, mind, and body, it'll also help prompt that and give you the flow that you're looking for.
11:51
SPEAKER_00: All right.
11:52
SPEAKER_00: The next prompt is E for explore, right?
11:57
SPEAKER_00: So we have L, E, and E is for explore.
12:01
SPEAKER_00: What did you explore in 2023?
12:03
SPEAKER_00: Was there something you investigated or researched or tried out?
12:09
SPEAKER_00: Maybe you stepped outside of your comfort zone.
12:13
SPEAKER_00: Now, how many of you all enjoy doing that?
12:16
SPEAKER_00: Maybe that is so difficult.
12:19
SPEAKER_00: But maybe when you did, you discovered something different than what you had feared or imagined.
12:26
SPEAKER_00: The whole point is not that it came out a certain way or that you achieved something here.
12:34
SPEAKER_00: It is about remembering what you tried out, that you explored something new.
12:40
SPEAKER_00: And you guys, no matter what the outcome was, it is worth celebrating that you did something different and stepped out of your comfort zone.
12:48
SPEAKER_00: One of the things that I tried for my spirit this year was to give myself a little bit more diversity and a rotation in my morning reading.
12:56
SPEAKER_00: So that just looked like trying different types of Bible studies, different rhythms with those.
13:02
SPEAKER_00: And even you'll laugh, but having two go at the same time or rotating back and forth every other day.
13:10
SPEAKER_00: Now, I didn't formulate this.
13:12
SPEAKER_00: This is just my probably Enneagram 7 self-showing here, but I just decided I wanted to mix it up, that I needed to shake things up a little bit.
13:21
SPEAKER_00: I realized I was just getting in a not routine, like routine is good, right?
13:26
SPEAKER_00: And rhythms are good and habits are good, but it was kind of getting in a rut.
13:29
SPEAKER_00: And I needed to shake up that rhythm.
13:32
SPEAKER_00: So I tried a lot of different kinds of Bible studies and readings and practices.
13:37
SPEAKER_00: What I really um enjoyed exploring was even though I love the Lectio 365 app and to start that with that in the morning, for six months, I decided I wasn't going to even look at my phone in the morning.
13:51
SPEAKER_00: And that meant if I didn't want to look at it before a certain time of my day, that meant I had to leave it in another room, which I typically don't have it in my bedroom, but I had to even not look at it as I got my morning cup of coffee and I got my Bible and journal and study.
14:07
SPEAKER_00: So I didn't have my phone at all to use the Lactio 365.
14:11
SPEAKER_00: And I really enjoyed that.
14:13
SPEAKER_00: That was really great.
14:14
SPEAKER_00: Now I've enjoyed having the Lactio 365 over the advent season in addition to a couple of my other readings.
14:20
SPEAKER_00: And so it's back in my life again, and I can see that it was really good for me to not even touch it before.
14:27
SPEAKER_00: Oh, usually, I know this sounds so silly, but I'm up early.
14:30
SPEAKER_00: But it meant I wasn't touching it till about 6.30, 6.45.
14:34
SPEAKER_00: And that was a long time to not be on my phone at all.
14:38
SPEAKER_00: And it was good.
14:39
SPEAKER_00: So I explored that, and I'll I think I'll be trying that again in 2024.
14:44
SPEAKER_00: Another thing I explored for my mind was the six working genius.
14:49
SPEAKER_00: You guys, I cannot wait to tell you more about this.
14:52
SPEAKER_00: It is something that I discovered in 2022.
14:55
SPEAKER_00: I've been listening to the podcast.
14:56
SPEAKER_00: You may have heard of Patrick Lincioni before.
14:59
SPEAKER_00: He is this leadership expert, really a kind-hearted mentor and teacher in the leadership space.
15:06
SPEAKER_00: And often what I would categorize as an unsung hero, he's actually really big in a lot of sense, but it's because he's been doing it for so long.
15:15
SPEAKER_00: He's not after like the big flashy fame.
15:18
SPEAKER_00: He just has consistently put out amazing content from a biblical perspective, but without it being religious up front.
15:27
SPEAKER_00: That is just incredible for every single person out there.
15:31
SPEAKER_00: Truly, he talks about the leader, but he also talks about the worker and just what it looks like to show up better in the workplace.
15:37
SPEAKER_00: Anyway, in 2020, I think it was they came up with a new uh typology assessment or personality assessment called the Six Working Genius.
15:47
SPEAKER_00: I'm not going to unpack it here, but I ended up getting certified as a certified facilitator in this process to be able to take into businesses and organizations.
15:55
SPEAKER_00: And it's a two-hour or four-hour workshop that is just phenomenal.
16:00
SPEAKER_00: And the insights itself has unlocked some profound aha moments, not only for me as a person and personally and in my family, but for my work and how I go about finding joy in doing my work and working with others.
16:16
SPEAKER_00: Okay, as you can tell, I have a lot of words around it, but that is something I explored, ended up choosing to go ahead and get the certification.
16:25
SPEAKER_00: At first I was exploring and then I decided to do it, and I have no regrets there.
16:28
SPEAKER_00: You'll be hearing more about it in 2024.
16:30
SPEAKER_00: In the meantime, you can just check out their website.
16:33
SPEAKER_00: And along with other things I might mention here today, you can find the links in the show notes.
16:38
SPEAKER_00: Okay, something I explored for my body that is really funny and silly and I never saw coming, and that was ice bath or cold plunge.
16:48
SPEAKER_00: You may have heard it talked about.
16:50
SPEAKER_00: It's a little bit of a new fad, if you will.
16:53
SPEAKER_00: I think it's been around forever for athletes and Olympians and people who are into sports.
16:59
SPEAKER_00: So it's not a new thing there, but the general public has kind of gone into this.
17:03
SPEAKER_00: It's not something that I really was aware about until my husband told me about it.
17:08
SPEAKER_00: And he was like, we need to do this ice bath thing or this cold plunge.
17:12
SPEAKER_00: And I admittedly rolled my eyes.
17:14
SPEAKER_00: I'm like, what are you talking about?
17:15
SPEAKER_00: This is crazy.
17:16
SPEAKER_00: I'm like, no way, Jose.
17:17
SPEAKER_00: That's fine.
17:18
SPEAKER_00: You can do it.
17:18
SPEAKER_00: So I think it was August.
17:20
SPEAKER_00: We invested in a hundred dollar Tupperware tub.
17:24
SPEAKER_00: I think it's a hundred gallons or something to that effect, just from the utility store or the hardware store.
17:30
SPEAKER_00: And we've, because it was warmer back then in August, we would fill it up with a cooler full of ice and water.
17:37
SPEAKER_00: And as a whole family, all five of us, we would do our plunge.
17:42
SPEAKER_00: And oh my goodness, I was like, this is terrible.
17:45
SPEAKER_00: This you should have seen the first time I did it.
17:47
SPEAKER_00: I was hyperventilating.
17:48
SPEAKER_00: I was being very loud and expressive about how I felt about this experience.
17:53
SPEAKER_00: As you can tell, I'm doing it now, right?
17:55
SPEAKER_00: Um, but anyway, I explored it and I thought, you know, I'll do it once because the kids are doing it.
18:00
SPEAKER_00: And then I was like, well, I'll do it twice because they all still want to do it, and it's kind of a silly fun family bonding moment.
18:06
SPEAKER_00: And then it was like three times, four times, and then now you guys, I can't even believe I'm saying this.
18:12
SPEAKER_00: But I purposely go do the cold plunge three times a week by myself after my workout.
18:20
SPEAKER_00: Now, okay, if you're into this thing and you know that like when you're supposed to do it, when you're not supposed to do it, and the benefits and all of that sort of stuff, I don't know.
18:28
SPEAKER_00: I haven't researched all that stuff.
18:29
SPEAKER_00: I've just done it.
18:30
SPEAKER_00: And I can't tell you exactly that it's like brought about these XYZ results.
18:37
SPEAKER_00: I just kind of have come to like it and I feel good.
18:40
SPEAKER_00: Now, these cold months, it's been a little bit harder to get warm.
18:43
SPEAKER_00: My feet in particular take forever to warm up.
18:47
SPEAKER_00: But I don't know.
18:48
SPEAKER_00: It's something I explored, I tried it out, and it's kind of fun.
18:52
SPEAKER_00: So here we are.
18:53
SPEAKER_00: And I am actually going to be really looking forward to it this summer.
18:57
SPEAKER_00: That is gonna feel awesome.
18:58
SPEAKER_00: I'll be in there for maybe I'll be in there for 10 minutes, who knows?
19:02
SPEAKER_00: All right, now for the third prompt and learn.
19:06
SPEAKER_00: A.
19:06
SPEAKER_00: A is for accomplish.
19:09
SPEAKER_00: Sometimes this prompt is the hardest because of all the things that you still want to accomplish.
19:14
SPEAKER_00: And it's easy to forget or acknowledge that you have actually accomplished some things and probably more than you remember, even if what you set out for didn't exactly turn out the way you wanted to, right?
19:27
SPEAKER_00: The outcome didn't match the expectations.
19:29
SPEAKER_00: But the thing is, you still did a lot, and maybe there is more to do, or you could have done more.
19:36
SPEAKER_00: But the point is you did do some things.
19:39
SPEAKER_00: So again, we're gonna take the idea of spirit, mind, and body.
19:42
SPEAKER_00: What did you accomplish?
19:44
SPEAKER_00: For spirit, I finished a couple of very deep Bible studies, challenging ones, and I'm already excited for the ones that I have on my bookshelf for 2024.
19:53
SPEAKER_00: Now, in my mind, whoa, guys, I had no idea that I was gonna accomplish this.
19:58
SPEAKER_00: But what I ended up doing is creating nine months of a very in-depth mentorship and training and certification for coaches, specifically those who wanted to be a wholehearted coach and learn my wholehearted coaching process, not only for one-on-one clients, but even for businesses and leadership teams.
20:19
SPEAKER_00: I had no idea that I was going to put this together.
20:22
SPEAKER_00: Oh, and I should add, the first part of this training is how to actually build a sustainable business you love and makes money.
20:30
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
20:30
SPEAKER_00: Anyway, I did not put this on my goal list for 2023.
20:34
SPEAKER_00: I probably would have doubted that I could ever do anything like that.
20:38
SPEAKER_00: But I see now how the Lord set up several different ideas and conversations in 2022 that led early in 2023 for me to decide now is the time.
20:49
SPEAKER_00: Now is the time to offer this.
20:51
SPEAKER_00: It was something that a lot of you in this community had been asking for, been starting to coach a lot of coaches, and they wanted more than just the emotional support and processing that I could offer as a coach.
21:02
SPEAKER_00: They wanted the business side too.
21:03
SPEAKER_00: They wanted to know how I was doing it, and they wanted to know how to use the content that I created for them with others.
21:10
SPEAKER_00: So I am proud to say that I birthed a quote unquote baby.
21:15
SPEAKER_00: Yep, it was nine months of weekly work, so many videos, so many worksheets, so many different things I learned about myself and the process.
21:25
SPEAKER_00: So I am so grateful for the 15 coaches that have either completed it or in the process of completing it.
21:32
SPEAKER_00: And I'm excited to be offering it to more in this next year.
21:36
SPEAKER_00: So, you know, if you're a coach, if you're interested, or you're an aspiring or emerging coach and you want to learn more, well, stay tuned.
21:42
SPEAKER_00: I'll definitely be sharing more about this soon.
21:45
SPEAKER_00: All right, one last thing that I accomplished in my body is that I did more cooking and baking this year.
21:51
SPEAKER_00: It was something that I had often relegated to my middle daughter because she loves baking and cooking, but she didn't have as much time this year, so I kind of took Back the bowl and the spatula and made a weekly cookie a lot of times during the school year, or just went back to some of the other rhythms that I used to have, like making an egg casserole for the week, or you know, doing things that were in a bigger batch to help with the meal prep the rest of the week.
22:18
SPEAKER_00: And I really enjoyed doing that.
22:20
SPEAKER_00: All right, now for the R prompt in Learn.
22:23
SPEAKER_00: Now, this one you can do one of two ways.
22:25
SPEAKER_00: I've talked about both of them before.
22:27
SPEAKER_00: When I've used it with my kids, especially when I started it when they were younger, we used R for read.
22:33
SPEAKER_00: It was a very easy question to ask the kids what did you read today, or what kind of things did you want to read.
22:40
SPEAKER_00: It's a fun way to hear book recommendations or just kind of know what's happening in the classroom or what the teacher is talking about.
22:47
SPEAKER_00: But what I also like to do, and what you would see on my guide sheet, is I use R for redo.
22:54
SPEAKER_00: Yes, R-E-D-O, redo.
22:57
SPEAKER_00: Now, there are things that we would all like to redo.
23:00
SPEAKER_00: And the reason why I want to take time reflecting on this is to discern what you learned along the way, not necessarily what you would do differently.
23:09
SPEAKER_00: I'm not inviting us to sit and regret because I think, yes, we may have done things differently next time, but we just don't know what we don't know.
23:17
SPEAKER_00: So there might be some things about how we want to redo things going into next year.
23:24
SPEAKER_00: This one's a little bit nuanced, so I feel like the fact I'm giving examples is really gonna help you because I think ultimately when you evaluate and get clear on what you would redo, it helps you to look ahead for next year to know what you're gonna say yes to and what you're gonna say no to.
23:40
SPEAKER_00: So for my spirit, I do have a confession to make.
23:44
SPEAKER_00: I honestly spent way too much time worrying about what others were thinking of me and then trying to fix it.
23:50
SPEAKER_00: So here's the thing when it comes to strangers and just random people that I don't know well, I I honestly don't spend too much time worried or thinking about what they think.
24:00
SPEAKER_00: But I care deeply about my people, about my circle, whether it's my coaches, my clients, my dear friends, I really care what they think because I want to be seen as a helpful, supportive, nice, and generous person who genuinely cares.
24:15
SPEAKER_00: And sometimes it either didn't come across the right way, it got misinterpreted or misunderstood, or we were both just having a bad day.
24:25
SPEAKER_00: And it was hard for me to walk that out.
24:28
SPEAKER_00: Now, I do think it's really important, especially if I have an issue on my end, I need to repent and repair and restore.
24:36
SPEAKER_00: But what I did too oftentimes for situations that I had already done those steps and it still wasn't making it right, I spent a lot of time worrying about it.
24:46
SPEAKER_00: And I would give it to the Lord, but then I would take it back.
24:49
SPEAKER_00: And then I would give it to the Lord the next day and take it back because I thought for sure if I could just do something a better way or had this conversation or did this thing or said this thing that I could fix it.
25:01
SPEAKER_00: When in reality, I have learned there was just nothing to fix.
25:05
SPEAKER_00: And that kind of leads me to my next thought of what I would redo when it comes to my mind is the overthinking and second guessing.
25:12
SPEAKER_00: I could probably take longer to unpack this, and this could be maybe not fully understood.
25:18
SPEAKER_00: But ultimately, I spent a lot of time making a decision on things.
25:22
SPEAKER_00: And even though I spent all that time deciding, I made a decision that wasn't exactly right.
25:29
SPEAKER_00: Or ultimately, it didn't have the outcome that matched my expectations.
25:34
SPEAKER_00: So all the overthinking and second guessing, it didn't change the outcome whatsoever.
25:39
SPEAKER_00: And I also walked away going, I wouldn't have made any other different decision.
25:43
SPEAKER_00: I would have still done this.
25:44
SPEAKER_00: What I needed to spend more time is getting really clear on my why and being confident of a good, better, best outcome and going for that good and being really content that most of the time it was just about doing the thing, not about how it turned out.
25:59
SPEAKER_00: So anyway, you might know what I mean if you've experienced the same thing.
26:04
SPEAKER_00: The last thing that I would redo, I shared this in my summer episode about 10 things I learned about the summer.
26:11
SPEAKER_00: And that was, I wish I had spent more time at the pool.
26:15
SPEAKER_00: I've come to find out my kids don't enjoy the pool at this stage of life.
26:19
SPEAKER_00: They are three teenagers that's always full of all sorts of, you know, struggles and thoughts and opinions.
26:26
SPEAKER_00: But I wish I had just gone ahead and grabbed my book and the tell and done the drive to the pool and enjoyed it for even if it was for 45 minutes.
26:35
SPEAKER_00: If I enjoyed it for myself, it would have been something that would have been soul care for me.
26:39
SPEAKER_00: So I would definitely redo that.
26:41
SPEAKER_00: And I'm looking to make that habit change next year.
26:45
SPEAKER_00: Now it's time for N, the prompt N in learn.
26:49
SPEAKER_00: And that N stands for navigate.
26:52
SPEAKER_00: What are you navigating right now?
26:54
SPEAKER_00: Or what did you navigate in 2023?
26:58
SPEAKER_00: What were the unique challenges, emotion, energy output, or even things that you were navigating about your faith?
27:05
SPEAKER_00: There's probably all sorts of things, and some might be really good, but some might be really, really challenging and hard.
27:12
SPEAKER_00: Now, in my spirit, I navigated a deeper perspective on boundaries.
27:16
SPEAKER_00: It was a live what I believe moment, something that I teach and tell my clients and help them process through.
27:22
SPEAKER_00: Well, it was time to learn how to navigate it myself and to have healthier relationships with friends, especially in my business life.
27:32
SPEAKER_00: And man, I'll tell you what, has not been easy.
27:34
SPEAKER_00: I've certainly learned a lot, and it'll probably be something I have to navigate into next year as well.
27:40
SPEAKER_00: But I hope that I'm getting clearer and kinder and more confident when it comes to boundaries.
27:47
SPEAKER_00: In my mind, I had to navigate tight deadlines.
27:51
SPEAKER_00: I mentioned the wholehearted mentorship that I talked about.
27:55
SPEAKER_00: And because this was a new program that I was offering and meant all new curriculum every single week.
28:03
SPEAKER_00: And I'm telling you, every single week for nine months, I came out with new teaching content specific for these coaches.
28:10
SPEAKER_00: I also met with them sometimes twice a week, at least once a week.
28:14
SPEAKER_00: And because of that, I had a lot of tight deadlines.
28:16
SPEAKER_00: Because not only was I creating all of that content, there was social media, there's this amazing, wonderful podcast, there's my weekly emails, and all sorts of other things that went on behind the scenes that maybe never even will know about.
28:29
SPEAKER_00: It was a lot.
28:30
SPEAKER_00: And for this Enneagram 7, TIE deadlines make me squirmy.
28:35
SPEAKER_00: Holy cow.
28:36
SPEAKER_00: I want to meet them and the part of me that really wants to please the people that I'm serving and delight them and wow them and everything.
28:45
SPEAKER_00: All of that felt very, very squeezed this year.
28:48
SPEAKER_00: So that was a little intense, but I lived to tell about it.
28:51
SPEAKER_00: I learned that I could do it.
28:53
SPEAKER_00: Whether I thought I could or not, the Lord would give me the grace that I needed, and He really did meet me in that.
28:59
SPEAKER_00: And last in my body, I did have to navigate some health issues this year.
29:03
SPEAKER_00: Um, thankfully, most of it was about resolving some issues.
29:06
SPEAKER_00: Unfortunately, I take some of these issues with me into the next year because some of them are chronic and might be with me until I see Jesus face to face.
29:15
SPEAKER_00: So that's always something to consider and a reason why to have a sustainable business I love, so that way I can take care of myself and have the kind of lifestyle that I need to stay healthy.
29:26
SPEAKER_00: Okay, another bonus thought I felt worth sharing about navigating is that I continue to find myself being surprised about how much motherhood throws curveballs at every single stage.
29:38
SPEAKER_00: Things that I constantly have to navigate.
29:40
SPEAKER_00: Or if you are a fellow mom, you know we have to navigate all the time.
29:44
SPEAKER_00: I think I naively assumed that once my kids got to elementary or junior high or maybe even high school, there wasn't going to be such a steep learning curve or so much to navigate as a mom.
29:55
SPEAKER_00: But I was wrong, clearly.
29:57
SPEAKER_00: I'll tell you what, every year.
29:59
SPEAKER_00: Um the list is long of the things that we had to navigate in parenthood for our kids, and and I wouldn't have it any other way.
30:06
SPEAKER_00: But it does add a very interesting dynamic.
30:09
SPEAKER_00: All right, friend, you did it.
30:11
SPEAKER_00: You went through the reflection learn process.
30:15
SPEAKER_00: That's what it looks like.
30:16
SPEAKER_00: Hopefully, my thoughts were helpful to you.
30:20
SPEAKER_00: And hopefully it feels less challenging to give yourself a little bit of time to learn from the past.
30:27
SPEAKER_00: Now, some of you learning from the past is very easy.
30:31
SPEAKER_00: You're naturally reflective, and you invite the rest of us to remember and learn.
30:37
SPEAKER_00: Now, why is this?
30:38
SPEAKER_00: And why do some of us struggle and others excel?
30:42
SPEAKER_00: Well, I'm going to remind you of a little Enneagram fact that you have heard me talk about before if you've been around here for a while, but I think it's worth reminding you again.
30:52
SPEAKER_00: So the Enneagram helps us understand, especially our communication pattern of how we relate to time and how some of us love to look back and reflect.
31:04
SPEAKER_00: Others are really about the present and are focused, sometimes hyper focused, on what's happening right now.
31:10
SPEAKER_00: And then others of us, well, we are constantly thinking about what the future holds or what it is that we want to do in the future, and we are planning, planning, planning for what is next.
31:22
SPEAKER_00: So all of those different categories, and again, I have taught a ton on this because, well, I just love nerding out on it.
31:29
SPEAKER_00: So I'll link to the resources and the podcast and things like that if you want to hear more about that.
31:35
SPEAKER_00: But remind yourself that your strength may not be in reflection.
31:40
SPEAKER_00: So give yourself the grace to make it a spacious time to step into this and give yourself a little break and pat on the back when you've actually done it and accomplished it.
31:53
SPEAKER_00: But I want to invite every single one of you to go through this process, whether it's your strength or whether it's a weakness.
32:00
SPEAKER_00: And then what I want you to do is to take the learn prompts, L-E-A-R-N, right?
32:06
SPEAKER_00: Like, explore, accomplish, redo, navigate, and think about your present moment.
32:12
SPEAKER_00: Whether you're already well into 2024 or you're just coming off the holiday hangover, think about what has really worked for you right now or what is working for you right now.
32:25
SPEAKER_00: That's gonna help inform how you plan for the future and what you're thinking of.
32:31
SPEAKER_00: So, those of you who are fully present and can take a little bit of time to reflect on what you like, what you are exploring, what you are accomplishing, what you would redo, and what you have to navigate right now.
32:42
SPEAKER_00: It's gonna be a good prompt.
32:43
SPEAKER_00: Now, this one might not take as long because you've perhaps covered most of it in the reflection, but I want you to take your present moment and welcome it into the process of thinking about the future.
32:55
SPEAKER_00: Okay, those of you who love to think about the future, this is your jam.
32:59
SPEAKER_00: This is what you were listening for.
33:01
SPEAKER_00: So I want you to take those same prompts.
33:03
SPEAKER_00: Like, explore, accomplish, redo, and navigate that learn process to learn about the wholehearted goals that you want for 2024, or what I often like to call whole-hearted rhythms.
33:16
SPEAKER_00: What would you like to do?
33:18
SPEAKER_00: What would you like to explore?
33:19
SPEAKER_00: What would you like to accomplish?
33:21
SPEAKER_00: What do you not want to redo?
33:24
SPEAKER_00: And maybe even your reading list, right?
33:28
SPEAKER_00: And what is it that you're probably going to have to navigate in the year ahead?
33:34
SPEAKER_00: This prompt can help you at every single step in this reflection process and in this setting of wholehearted rhythms and goals.
33:44
SPEAKER_00: Well, I have loved doing this in real time with you.
33:47
SPEAKER_00: And I hope that you have taken the time to write down some of the thoughts as they've come up and think through what it is that 2023 held for you and what it you are excited about 2024.
34:00
SPEAKER_00: I know that these years are never going to pan out how we plan them or how we think.
34:06
SPEAKER_00: There's going to be the unexpected.
34:08
SPEAKER_00: Unexpectedly hard things, but also oftentimes unexpectedly wonderful things.
34:15
SPEAKER_00: The point is remembering how God is with us through it all.
34:23
SPEAKER_00: He knows exactly what this year is going to be all about for you.
34:26
SPEAKER_00: So I invite you once again go through this process in stillness, silence, and solitude.
34:32
SPEAKER_00: Give it prayer, give it careful consideration, and ask the Lord to speak as you put pen to paper or fingers to keyboard, right?
34:42
SPEAKER_00: I loved doing this with you.
34:43
SPEAKER_00: So thanks for inviting me into this rhythm and into this year ahead.
34:49
SPEAKER_00: I really do pray that you feel the Lord's nearness most of all, and that you get to realize some of these dreams, hopes, and wishes that you have pinned down, or maybe you have at least allowed come to your heart and mind in this process.
35:04
SPEAKER_00: Of course, I would really love it if you invited others into this learn process.
35:10
SPEAKER_00: Use it with your kids, your spouse, maybe family, maybe even friends.
35:15
SPEAKER_00: Ultimately, it can really cultivate meaningful conversations.
35:18
SPEAKER_00: It doesn't have to be the whole year at a glance, right?
35:20
SPEAKER_00: It could just be about the day.
35:22
SPEAKER_00: If you enjoyed this, I would love to hear from you.
35:25
SPEAKER_00: You can always email me.
35:27
SPEAKER_00: You can tag wholehearted Enneagram on Instagram, even Facebook, or send me a direct message.
35:32
SPEAKER_00: I always reply there.
35:33
SPEAKER_00: And if there's something that you accomplish early on or want to share about what you're liking or exploring or even navigating in this year ahead, tag me as well.
35:43
SPEAKER_00: I want to have a conversation about it.
35:44
SPEAKER_00: I want to know what's happening in your world.
35:47
SPEAKER_00: Okay, and a little peek of what's going to be happening in the podcast world in 2024 here.
35:53
SPEAKER_00: So in January, you know we love to go through our word worship right rhythms, wholehearted rhythms that we love to make sure we focus on and really start our year solid.
36:05
SPEAKER_00: We take time, we take these several weeks to have our new year kind of come together.
36:11
SPEAKER_00: And I love to invite everyone into immersing ourselves into these rhythms because I think they are not only something that we get to do every day for the year ahead, but it also helps set the tone, especially when we're going through some of the goal setting or planning for the year ahead.
36:26
SPEAKER_00: So because I have years of content and conversations that I'm guessing you may have missed, and I really want to make sure everyone hears, I have decided to do a replay of a few of those conversations.
36:40
SPEAKER_00: Now it was really hard to pick.
36:42
SPEAKER_00: I can't even tell you.
36:43
SPEAKER_00: It was so tough.
36:44
SPEAKER_00: I was going through the archives going, holy cow, how on earth do I even decide which ones I re-release?
36:48
SPEAKER_00: So I very thoughtfully and prayerfully decided which of those messages I'm going to share.
36:54
SPEAKER_00: So stay tuned.
36:56
SPEAKER_00: So the rest of the month, we're going to be going through the wholehearted rhythms and you're going to hear some amazing messages.
37:01
SPEAKER_00: And even if you've heard them before, I bet that with this learn process in mind, you're going to hear them with fresh ears and maybe get some new takes on what it is that the Lord is inviting you into in 2024.
37:16
SPEAKER_00: All right, until next time, friend, continue to pursue God's perspective, purpose, and plans for your simply wholehearted life.