Latest / Good Morning From The Chicken Coop! / Season 3 - Episode 177 - Considering Cause & Effect

Transcript

Season 3 - Episode 177 - Considering Cause & Effect · Good Morning From The Chicken Coop!

• 0:01
  Welcome to the Good Morning from the Chicken Coop podcast with
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  Kim Johnson, your creative strategist and mastermind set
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  coach. Filled with inspiration,
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  distinctions, perspectives, and possibilities, we help you to
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  cultivate a mindset that leads you to create the best version
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  of yourself you could ever imagine.
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  Join Kim every morning from one of her favorite happy places,
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  her chicken coop, along with all her chickens.
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  Hey everybody, good morning from the chicken coop.
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  Today we're talking about cause and effect.
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  We all understand that things happen.
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  That's the 'cause, right? And then there's an effect
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  afterwards what we choose to believe or react to.
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  And cause and effect is so important to understand because,
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  you know, as Wayne Dyer said, it's not their fault for pushing
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  your buttons. It's your fault for having the
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  buttons they push. God, that was one of the most
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  impactful statements I ever read in a book many, many years ago.
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  And I read it and reread it and read it and reread it.
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  And I was like, wait, no, you know, it's him.
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  It's this, it's that. And it was such a realization to
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  me to recognize. And it still is over and over
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  about how quickly we can get hooked into having this
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  reaction, this effect of allowing something to get into
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  our head and having a reaction to it that is completely in our
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  control. You know, people will say, no,
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  it's not in my control. I mean, he did something.
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  He knew it was wrong. It pissed me off.
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  But you ultimately have all the control of how you respond.
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  No one can ever take that away from you.
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  I really want you to hear me say that.
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  No one can ever take that away from you.
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  You have the ability to control your response.
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  You have the ability to decide what that cause is going to do
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  to you and the effect it's going to have on you.
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  And when we hang on and we keep talking about things over and
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  over and over, it's a sign that we want closure.
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  It's a sign that we want to understand the reason why, you
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  know, it always comes back to that, well, why did this happen?
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  Why did this happen? And it's because we want to
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  regain some stability. We're looking for the certainty.
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  We want to try to fix the situation.
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  We want to say, well, wait, no see, you did that to me, but I
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  did this to you because of this happened.
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  And we always try to find a way to get around the fact that we
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  can't change the past. We just cannot.
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  We cannot change the past no matter what we do.
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  We cannot change the past, but we can change this moment and
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  moving forward, nothing else. So if you choose to dwell in the
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  past, that's fine. People will often say, well, you
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  learn a lot from the past. And I say potentially, I mean,
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  it's pretty up in the air. It depends on what you decide to
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  believe about it. You know, there are people out
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  there that will look at wars, like past wars that our country
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  has gone through, and they will argue the fact that, you know,
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  these wars were from one point of view.
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  And then you have other people that will look at it and say,
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  well, no, this was absolutely from this point of view.
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  And then you have other people who will look and say, well, we
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  didn't need to be there at all. And you're never going to get a
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  clear answer because it's all from the perspective you start
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  from. And you just have to accept the
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  fact that even with major things like going to war with other
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  countries, doing certain things, it's all from the perspective
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  you start from infinitely. If I get aggravated with the
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  fact that the dishwasher is not loaded the way I like to see it
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  loaded, is it their fault for loading the dishwasher wrong
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  after I've said it 100 * 1000 times?
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  Could be possibly. But the reality is other people
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  live in my house. Other people think they're doing
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  the right things according to themselves and their rules.
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  Other people are are entitled to have their opinions.
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  My way is not only the right way, there may be other right
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  ways to do things. And I have to accept that that
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  is a button that can be pushed for me.
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  And I'm using such a simple example because I want you to
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  understand that the cause is so something insignificant, but the
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  effect can just get me like, why, why, why, why?
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  And I let it throw me and it continues to show up in my world
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  to remind me. And now I laugh about it and
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  say, OK, am I going to let that button get pushed?
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  Why do I still possess that button?
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  Why is that button even here? So it's incredibly important for
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  you to recognize that the buttons are your buttons.
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  The reaction is absolutely your challenge, your responsibility,
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  your impact on yourself, because the effect that it has on you is
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  not just momentary, it's all day.
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  It's long lasting. So you have to make decisions
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  about how you want that to show up and if you're willing to take
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  that on and if you're willing to be aggravated long term.
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  There are times when I'll say to myself, Oh yeah, this really
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  pisses me off. And I'm going to have to allow
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  myself this frame of time to say, OK, yeah, I got to think
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  about this or I got to obsess on this or dwell on this.
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  I'm, I'm being completely real with you.
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  I do that. I give myself time, but I also
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  set a timer and I'll say, okay, I'm not going to be annoyed with
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  this for more than, you know, 24 hours, 48 hours.
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  Sometimes it goes up to 72 if it's a deli, but for the most
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  part, it's a, it's a set the time, let it go, set the time,
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  let it go because it's not going to help you and it's not going
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  to serve you and it's going to take you out.
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  So pay attention to cause and effect my friends.
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  Pay attention to cause and effect because it's necessary to
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  pay attention to cause and effect.
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  I hope you all have a very blessed day and I will see you
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  tomorrow. Bye.