Latest / ok storytime / I refused to let my brother in my car with his GROSS clothes... so I made him strip! -r/AmITheAsshole | Reddit Stories | EP3145

Transcript

I refused to let my brother in my car with his GROSS clothes... so I made him strip! -r/AmITheAsshole | Reddit Stories | EP3145 · ok storytime

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Hey, this is Angie.
• 0:01
  Speaker 2: And this is Carly, your favorite OK Storytime hosts.
• 0:04
  Speaker 3: And we've got some great stories coming up. But before that,
• 0:07
  Speaker 3: we have a quick two minute break from our sponsors
• 0:09
  Speaker 3: that keep the show alive.
• 0:12
  Speaker 4: I refuse to let my brother in my car with
• 0:14
  Speaker 4: his gross clothes. So I made him strip. How far down? I,
• 0:19
  Speaker 4: 28 female, have a very sensitive nose. I can't do perfume.
• 0:23
  Speaker 4: I tell guys not to wear cologne on a date.
• 0:26
  Speaker 4: I can't be around anyone smoking or I start gagging.
• 0:30
  Speaker 4: My whole family knows this and for the most part
• 0:32
  Speaker 4: are very supportive. This weekend, my brother, 24 male, called
• 0:35
  Speaker 4: me up at 2 a.m. because he and his girlfriend,
• 0:37
  Speaker 4: 22 female, had missed the last train out of the
• 0:39
  Speaker 4: city because they met up with some people at a
• 0:42
  Speaker 4: bar and wound up going back to their place for
• 0:44
  Speaker 4: a bit. Okay. He asked me to come get him.
• 0:47
  Speaker 4: My apartment is 40 minutes outside the city, and our parents,
• 0:50
  Speaker 4: who he lives with, are about an hour away. I
• 0:54
  Speaker 4: told him to get an Uber because if they reeked
• 0:56
  Speaker 4: of drink and smoke, I didn't want them in my car.
• 1:00
  Speaker 4: He said it would be too expensive, which is true.
• 1:04
  Speaker 4: Oh my gosh.
• 1:05
  Speaker 5: Oh man.
• 1:05
  Speaker 4: Go find a shower. Got a sensitive schnoz over here.
• 1:19
  Speaker 4: By the way, this comes from UnusualReception738. If you want
• 1:22
  Speaker 4: to submit your own stories, go to our subreddit. I'm Dakota.
• 1:25
  Speaker 6: I'm Riley.
• 1:26
  Speaker 4: And we're going to read this story and have our thoughts,
• 1:28
  Speaker 4: but just know we don't know everything. Except that this
• 1:32
  Speaker 4: girl has smell problems.
• 1:34
  Speaker 6: Let us know if you do.
• 1:35
  Speaker 4: Yeah, let us know what you know and what your
• 1:37
  Speaker 4: problems are down in the comments. OP says, I got
• 1:40
  Speaker 4: to the address about an hour later. They came out
• 1:43
  Speaker 4: and it was clear that they were both inebriated. My
• 1:46
  Speaker 4: brother went to hug me, and I could immediately smell
• 1:50
  Speaker 4: the scent of the devil's lettuce on him. I started retching,
• 1:54
  Speaker 4: told him it wasn't going to work, and to call
• 1:56
  Speaker 4: an Uber.
• 1:57
  Speaker 5: Wow. Okay.
• 1:58
  Speaker 4: That's so extreme.
• 2:00
  Speaker 6: That's tough. Can he wear a sanitation suit? Can you, like,
• 2:05
  Speaker 6: can you crack the windows?
• 2:06
  Speaker 5: Anything?
• 2:07
  Speaker 6: Well, then she'd smell outside.
• 2:08
  Speaker 4: She can't do that. Outside smell.
• 2:11
  Speaker 6: Did you bring rope? We can put them on top
• 2:12
  Speaker 6: of the car.
• 2:13
  Speaker 4: Yeah, just tie them to the top. We showered. There's
• 2:16
  Speaker 4: no way you're smelling anything. It's all in your head.
• 2:19
  Speaker 4: That's what he said to me. Apparently their solution was
• 2:22
  Speaker 4: to shower in these people's apartment thinking that would get
• 2:24
  Speaker 4: rid of the smell on their clothes. I told them
• 2:28
  Speaker 4: to call an Uber and got back into my car.
• 2:30
  Speaker 4: He banged on the window. I told him that he
• 2:33
  Speaker 4: wasn't getting in my car like that. I told him
• 2:35
  Speaker 4: I'd give him half the money for an Uber and
• 2:37
  Speaker 4: I was leaving. He told me to just roll the
• 2:40
  Speaker 4: windows down. I told him that I didn't want it
• 2:42
  Speaker 4: in my car.
• 2:43
  Speaker 6: He said, I showered.
• 2:45
  Speaker 4: These are the only clothes I have. I can't ride
• 2:47
  Speaker 4: home with no clothes. And that gave me an idea.
• 2:50
  Speaker 6: Oh, Lord. Shouldn't have said anything.
• 2:55
  Speaker 4: Well, it's better than the Uber. I opened my trunk,
• 2:59
  Speaker 4: grabbed two blankets and trash bags. I told them to
• 3:02
  Speaker 4: put their clothes in the bags and cover up with
• 3:04
  Speaker 4: the blankets. His girlfriend handed it back and said, F
• 3:07
  Speaker 4: that I'm walking and walked away. My brother told me
• 3:11
  Speaker 4: I was out of my mind and it was all
• 3:12
  Speaker 4: in my head. I reached in my wallet, pulled out
• 3:14
  Speaker 4: 50 bucks and said to call an Uber. He handed
• 3:17
  Speaker 4: it back and told me to hold on and ran
• 3:18
  Speaker 4: after his girlfriend. They came back and he asked if
• 3:21
  Speaker 4: they could sit in the back with the windows open.
• 3:23
  Speaker 4: I told him I wouldn't be able to stand it
• 3:25
  Speaker 4: for an hour. So they begrudgingly stripped, put their clothes
• 3:28
  Speaker 4: in the bags and I tied them off and threw
• 3:30
  Speaker 4: them in the trunk. I drove them to our parents'
• 3:32
  Speaker 4: house in silence and dropped them off without a thank you.
• 3:35
  Speaker 4: My brother's girlfriend unfriended me on Facebook. He and she
• 3:38
  Speaker 4: are not speaking, and my mom is furious with me,
• 3:41
  Speaker 4: saying that I embarrassed them and I was being overly sensitive.
• 3:44
  Speaker 4: She says I should have called her so she could
• 3:47
  Speaker 4: have gotten them. My mom goes to bed at nine,
• 3:49
  Speaker 4: so I don't think she would have been thrilled. I
• 3:51
  Speaker 4: feel bad that I put that condition on it, but
• 3:53
  Speaker 4: I would not have been able to tolerate being in
• 3:55
  Speaker 4: the car otherwise. Am I the a-hole here? I hate
• 3:59
  Speaker 4: to break it to you.
• 4:02
  Speaker 5: Yeah, a little.
• 4:03
  Speaker 4: I mean, a little maybe.
• 4:06
  Speaker 6: Little maybe.
• 4:06
  Speaker 4: I think it's crazy to me that they didn't have any.
• 4:10
  Speaker 4: They weren't good sports about it or couldn't make it
• 4:12
  Speaker 4: funny at all. Because that's honestly hilarious. Having to take
• 4:16
  Speaker 4: off all of your clothes and wrap up in a
• 4:19
  Speaker 4: blanket in your sister's car.
• 4:21
  Speaker 6: I'm having a good time. I think from an outside
• 4:24
  Speaker 6: perspective or three years down the line. Yeah, but in
• 4:26
  Speaker 6: the moment. Have you ever had to go outside because
• 4:29
  Speaker 6: you got super muddy and your mom had to hose
• 4:30
  Speaker 6: you down?
• 4:31
  Speaker 4: Uh, I'm sure I've been hosed.
• 4:33
  Speaker 6: It's, I feel like it's similar to that experience.
• 4:36
  Speaker 4: It just, I would be, I don't have any siblings,
• 4:39
  Speaker 4: but I'd be so annoying. I feel like in the back,
• 4:41
  Speaker 4: if I'm wrapped in a blanket, my sister's driving, I'd be.
• 4:44
  Speaker 6: Like, Oh, flashing, flashing.
• 4:48
  Speaker 4: I'd be, I'd be, I don't know. I'd be annoying.
• 4:50
  Speaker 5: I don't know.
• 4:51
  Speaker 6: She has so much power for you to remove your
• 4:53
  Speaker 6: clothes and get into her car that if you pulled
• 4:56
  Speaker 6: anything like that, who knows what she'd say? She guilt-tripped you.
• 4:59
  Speaker 6: I'm driving you around. I'm the one that got out
• 5:01
  Speaker 6: of bed and made you... She's power-tripping, dog.
• 5:05
  Speaker 4: Oh, I just realized that. The power-trip in front of
• 5:09
  Speaker 4: the girlfriend.
• 5:11
  Speaker 5: Oh. Yeah.
• 5:12
  Speaker 4: Now she's like, your sister literally forced us to take
• 5:16
  Speaker 4: our clothes off. Like, what is wrong with you?
• 5:17
  Speaker 6: Yeah, yeah. And you made me do it. You made
• 5:19
  Speaker 6: me get in the back of her car with her.
• 5:21
  Speaker 6: And she was willing to walk an hour. An hour.
• 5:26
  Speaker 4: She wasn't walking. That was another power play. She got
• 5:29
  Speaker 4: out power played.
• 5:30
  Speaker 6: She did, dude. Ridiculous.
• 5:32
  Speaker 4: Got an edit. I have been asked to add some
• 5:34
  Speaker 4: info into my post that I answered in the comments.
• 5:37
  Speaker 4: My reaction to smell is very extreme.
• 5:39
  Speaker 5: I retch. I gag.
• 5:40
  Speaker 4: I throw up. My eyes water. My stomach churns. Is
• 5:43
  Speaker 4: it bad that I hear that and I'm like, you're
• 5:45
  Speaker 4: not built to exist?
• 5:47
  Speaker 5: No.
• 5:47
  Speaker 4: Do you know what I mean?
• 5:48
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 5:48
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 5:49
  Speaker 4: Like, I understand, like, I'm not trying to denigrate like
• 5:53
  Speaker 4: this person, but it's like, if it's so extreme, like,
• 5:57
  Speaker 4: like if I had that, it'd be like every, I
• 5:59
  Speaker 4: would try everything on earth to undo that. I get migraines.
• 6:04
  Speaker 4: My heart races. I get chills that make everything else worse.
• 6:08
  Speaker 4: I could not have driven home with that stench in
• 6:10
  Speaker 4: my car. We would not have been safe. Everyone who's voting.
• 6:14
  Speaker 4: I'm the a-hole seems to think I forced this girl
• 6:16
  Speaker 4: to take off her clothes to punish or humiliate her.
• 6:19
  Speaker 4: There was no part of me that enjoyed asking my
• 6:21
  Speaker 4: brother to give up his clothes to get in my car.
• 6:24
  Speaker 4: I had no smile on my face, and I apologized
• 6:26
  Speaker 4: to them for being so sensitive to smell. I pushed
• 6:29
  Speaker 4: for the Uber. I even offered to cover most of it.
• 6:32
  Speaker 4: It would have been $ 65 for them to get home.
• 6:34
  Speaker 6: Are you giving them $ 50?
• 6:36
  Speaker 4: Oh, at that point, I'm taking the Uber. I thought
• 6:38
  Speaker 4: it would have been like $ 100. At that point, I
• 6:40
  Speaker 4: just take it.
• 6:41
  Speaker 5: What?
• 6:41
  Speaker 4: I go, thanks.
• 6:42
  Speaker 6: For $ 15? Yeah, no wonder I'd be mad.
• 6:44
  Speaker 4: All right, now you're not the a-hole anymore. Maybe you
• 6:48
  Speaker 4: were never the a-hole. Actually, they didn't want to get
• 6:52
  Speaker 4: in an Uber when they were in that condition, which
• 6:54
  Speaker 4: is dumb because that's what Ubers are for. I was
• 6:57
  Speaker 4: embarrassed to ask them to strip, but there was not
• 7:00
  Speaker 4: a way for me to make it for an hour
• 7:01
  Speaker 4: with them in the car in those clothes. I did
• 7:04
  Speaker 4: not tell them to do it. I told them to
• 7:06
  Speaker 4: put their clothes in the bag. OK, now what are
• 7:08
  Speaker 4: we talking about?
• 7:09
  Speaker 6: They still unclothed.
• 7:11
  Speaker 4: Clothes only get in the bag when you take them
• 7:13
  Speaker 4: all off.
• 7:14
  Speaker 6: Put them in the bag. It sounds like you robbed
• 7:16
  Speaker 6: them at this point.
• 7:17
  Speaker 4: Maybe you should have, like, taken the bags and they
• 7:19
  Speaker 4: could have just tied the bags around themselves. To, like, see, like,
• 7:22
  Speaker 4: kind of, like, make, like, a.
• 7:23
  Speaker 6: Knowing OP, don't think that'd be enough.
• 7:25
  Speaker 4: They went behind the car. I had my back to
• 7:28
  Speaker 4: them and was keeping my distance. What, did people think
• 7:30
  Speaker 4: you were, like, examining them? My brother handed me the
• 7:33
  Speaker 4: bags and I tied them up and threw them in
• 7:35
  Speaker 4: the trunk without inspecting them. The blankets were a good size,
• 7:39
  Speaker 4: so all you could really see is that both were
• 7:41
  Speaker 4: barefoot and had removed their shirts and pants. I do
• 7:44
  Speaker 4: not know if they left their underwear on or were
• 7:46
  Speaker 4: unclothed under there. Any intimate bits were covered. And there
• 7:50
  Speaker 4: is an update.
• 7:51
  Speaker 6: Okay. Dakota, I'm going to ask you a real sensitive
• 7:53
  Speaker 6: question here.
• 7:54
  Speaker 5: Uh-oh.
• 7:54
  Speaker 6: After a hard day's work and partying and going out, well,
• 7:59
  Speaker 6: they showered.
• 7:59
  Speaker 5: Take that back.
• 8:00
  Speaker 4: They did shower.
• 8:01
  Speaker 6: But after a hard day's work and partying, don't your
• 8:04
  Speaker 6: undies kind of smell? It's true.
• 8:06
  Speaker 4: You've got to change the undies every day.
• 8:09
  Speaker 6: And if you're that sensitive to smell, they probably were nakey-nakey.
• 8:14
  Speaker 4: Are you sensitive to.
• 8:16
  Speaker 6: They took a shower, cooch. Snail trail.
• 8:20
  Speaker 4: I guess, you know, the stench of loin. Loin stench
• 8:25
  Speaker 4: isn't as bad for OP.
• 8:27
  Speaker 6: I also know you have no friends, OP. I'm sorry
• 8:29
  Speaker 6: about that. There's got to be some neurological thing they
• 8:32
  Speaker 6: can do and fix her brain.
• 8:33
  Speaker 4: That's what I'm saying. There's some way you can fix this, right?
• 8:37
  Speaker 4: There's got to be. Because that's debilitating.
• 8:39
  Speaker 6: You can make people blind. Can't you make them nose blind?
• 8:41
  Speaker 4: Because you can't control that, too. It's like, what if
• 8:43
  Speaker 4: you're just out at a music festival or something?
• 8:47
  Speaker 6: Someone opens up some beef jerky.
• 8:49
  Speaker 4: Yeah, you smell a smell you can't smell, and now
• 8:53
  Speaker 4: you're in the crowd. It'd be terrible.
• 8:55
  Speaker 5: Fix it.
• 8:57
  Speaker 4: So my brother's girlfriend texted me that she wanted to
• 9:00
  Speaker 4: meet up to drop off the blanket to me. Uh-oh.
• 9:03
  Speaker 4: When I dropped them off, I grabbed the bags out
• 9:05
  Speaker 4: of my trunk and handed them to them. I did
• 9:07
  Speaker 4: not ask for the blankets back as I didn't know
• 9:10
  Speaker 4: if they had anything on underneath and I really just
• 9:12
  Speaker 4: wanted to go to bed. By this point, it was
• 9:15
  Speaker 4: like 4.30 in the morning. She came over to my apartment,
• 9:18
  Speaker 4: joked about if she had to undress to come inside
• 9:20
  Speaker 4: and handed me my blanket back. She said it was
• 9:22
  Speaker 4: very soft and comfortable and she apologized for not giving
• 9:25
  Speaker 4: it back that night. But she was kind of, you know,
• 9:27
  Speaker 4: completely naked underneath it. And she actually washed it in
• 9:31
  Speaker 4: unscented detergent.
• 9:33
  Speaker 5: Oh, that was thoughtful.
• 9:34
  Speaker 6: Okay, this person's awesome.
• 9:35
  Speaker 4: Okay, so she's nice. She thanked me for coming to
• 9:37
  Speaker 4: get them the other night and apologized for freaking out
• 9:40
  Speaker 4: and explained a few things. My brother had told her
• 9:42
  Speaker 4: the trains ran all night. He wanted to stay with
• 9:45
  Speaker 4: these friends of his and she couldn't stand the smell
• 9:47
  Speaker 4: in there. Oh, a smell sympathizer. She had called several friends,
• 9:54
  Speaker 4: none of whom were willing to come get her at
• 9:55
  Speaker 4: two in the morning. He claimed our mother didn't keep
• 9:58
  Speaker 4: her phone on that late, which is why he called her.
• 10:00
  Speaker 2: Me.
• 10:01
  Speaker 4: He kept insisting that I'd never let them in the
• 10:02
  Speaker 4: car and they should just stay there. I think he
• 10:05
  Speaker 4: called me there just so I would refuse and they
• 10:07
  Speaker 4: could stay. She's the one who suggested they shower so
• 10:10
  Speaker 4: it wouldn't be so bad for me. I guess she
• 10:12
  Speaker 4: didn't realize how bad my issues were. Since my brother
• 10:16
  Speaker 4: lives with our parents... She thinks he wanted some alone
• 10:18
  Speaker 4: time with her since they almost never get to spend
• 10:21
  Speaker 4: overnights together. She didn't even realize that I suggested they strip.
• 10:25
  Speaker 4: When I handed her the blanket in the bag, I
• 10:27
  Speaker 4: didn't hear my brother say to her, let's just stay here.
• 10:30
  Speaker 4: She thought I was giving her a blanket to sleep,
• 10:33
  Speaker 4: and that's when she stormed off.
• 10:35
  Speaker 6: Oh, interesting.
• 10:36
  Speaker 4: I don't know. Just, she's going to sleep on the
• 10:39
  Speaker 4: pavement with a blanket?
• 10:41
  Speaker 6: What? That's weird. I guess he was trying to get
• 10:42
  Speaker 6: some hanky-panky.
• 10:43
  Speaker 5: Mm-hmm.
• 10:44
  Speaker 4: Panky Panky. When she was walking away, she took us
• 10:47
  Speaker 4: all off Facebook because she was done with my brother.
• 10:50
  Speaker 4: She added me back. I think there were problems between
• 10:55
  Speaker 4: brother and girlfriend beyond the ride home from the sister.
• 11:00
  Speaker 4: She was more mad. It's like, why are we even here?
• 11:03
  Speaker 6: And the problems were so bad that stripping down and
• 11:08
  Speaker 6: getting in the back of your sister's car was not
• 11:10
  Speaker 6: even that big of a deal.
• 11:12
  Speaker 4: No, that was the solution to the problem. She's like,
• 11:14
  Speaker 4: I don't want to be here.
• 11:15
  Speaker 6: Why are we here?
• 11:16
  Speaker 4: I didn't want to be here. Why are we here?
• 11:19
  Speaker 4: It was the solution all along.
• 11:20
  Speaker 6: She was trying to get home. She was trying to
• 11:22
  Speaker 6: Matt Damon during six movies. Get home.
• 11:26
  Speaker 4: When he caught up, he suggested again that they just
• 11:30
  Speaker 4: stay there. He told her that I had told her
• 11:32
  Speaker 4: the only way they could ride was if they stripped
• 11:34
  Speaker 4: off their clothes and went home in blankets. She told him,
• 11:37
  Speaker 4: I feel gross. I want my bed. I don't care
• 11:40
  Speaker 4: at this point.
• 11:41
  Speaker 5: Let's just go.
• 11:43
  Speaker 4: When they came back, he suggested the windows roll down.
• 11:46
  Speaker 4: When I refused, she started undressing, so he went along
• 11:49
  Speaker 4: with it. As for why they didn't call an Uber,
• 11:51
  Speaker 4: he didn't want to, and she didn't want to ride
• 11:53
  Speaker 4: in one alone while she was wasted for an hour. Miraculously,
• 11:57
  Speaker 4: she's not done with my brother. She's pissed at him
• 12:00
  Speaker 4: for lying to her and stranding her without a ride back,
• 12:03
  Speaker 4: but she's going over there tomorrow to talk. She loves
• 12:06
  Speaker 4: the butthead, as she put it. She's made him a
• 12:08
  Speaker 4: lot more focused, and she's been good for him, so
• 12:10
  Speaker 4: I'm happy she's sticking with him for now. I feel
• 12:13
  Speaker 4: a lot better after talking to her. And that is
• 12:16
  Speaker 4: the end of that story. At the end of the day,
• 12:21
  Speaker 4: just get your schnoz checked out.
• 12:23
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 12:24
  Speaker 4: Take care of your schnoz problem.
• 12:26
  Speaker 6: It went really from her problem to their problem pretty quick.
• 12:29
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 12:29
  Speaker 6: Can we not get you a doctor or something? I
• 12:32
  Speaker 6: don't know. She probably has this written down in another subreddit.
• 12:35
  Speaker 4: Hypnosis. I'm trying to empathize.
• 12:38
  Speaker 6: It'd be really hard.
• 12:39
  Speaker 4: I'm sure that they probably have tried, right? They're just not,
• 12:43
  Speaker 4: why would they, there's no reason to bring it up
• 12:45
  Speaker 4: in the story.
• 12:46
  Speaker 6: Imagine a world where you could see really well and
• 12:48
  Speaker 6: you could see through things and the curse that would
• 12:51
  Speaker 6: give you.
• 12:52
  Speaker 4: X-ray vision.
• 12:53
  Speaker 6: Can't even go to old people's home.
• 12:56
  Speaker 4: You can't, you can't turn it off.
• 12:58
  Speaker 5: That's her life.
• 12:58
  Speaker 4: That would be really rough.
• 12:59
  Speaker 6: That's her life, dude.
• 13:00
  Speaker 4: It's her life, but with nose. Anyway, that's the end
• 13:04
  Speaker 4: of that story. You got another one coming up.
• 13:07
  Speaker 6: My stepdaughter left the party I threw for her And
• 13:10
  Speaker 6: it made me furious.
• 13:12
  Speaker 4: It's her party.
• 13:14
  Speaker 6: She can leave if she wants to. I, 35 female,
• 13:18
  Speaker 6: have been married for seven years to my husband, 45 male,
• 13:22
  Speaker 6: who is a single father to my stepdaughter, Lucy, 15 female.
• 13:26
  Speaker 6: I also have a son from a previous relationship, Toby,
• 13:29
  Speaker 6: 10 male. In these seven years, Lucy never recognized us
• 13:34
  Speaker 6: as a family. And when she introduces us, we are
• 13:38
  Speaker 6: dad's wife and dad's wife's son. Birthdays are very important
• 13:42
  Speaker 6: to me. Ever since Toby was born, I've thrown a
• 13:45
  Speaker 6: giant birthday party for him. That didn't change after I
• 13:48
  Speaker 6: married my husband, and I thought about doing it for
• 13:51
  Speaker 6: Lucy as well, but she refused. She refuses every year,
• 13:56
  Speaker 6: and everything related to her birthday is banned from the house.
• 14:00
  Speaker 6: Since this year she's turning 15, I decided to throw
• 14:03
  Speaker 6: her a surprise party. We organized it with Toby, invitations
• 14:07
  Speaker 6: to her classmates, family, and close friends, games, karaoke, catering,
• 14:11
  Speaker 6: and decorations. Not even my husband knew. I took the
• 14:15
  Speaker 6: day off from work, and Toby skipped school to fix everything.
• 14:18
  Speaker 6: At night, my husband and Lucy arrived. They have dinner
• 14:21
  Speaker 6: alone for her birthday, and we yell, Surprise! They didn't
• 14:26
  Speaker 6: look happy, but I assumed it was because of the surprise.
• 14:30
  Speaker 6: My husband didn't say anything to me, and Lucy disappeared
• 14:33
  Speaker 6: almost immediately. I assumed to go talk to her friends.
• 14:37
  Speaker 6: By the way, this comes from Square Indication, And if
• 14:40
  Speaker 6: you want to see your own stories, go to the
• 14:41
  Speaker 6: r slash OKStoryTime subreddit. I'm Riley.
• 14:44
  Speaker 4: I'm Dakota.
• 14:45
  Speaker 6: And we're going to read this goofily about this 15-year-old
• 14:47
  Speaker 6: girl who hates surprises and parties.
• 14:49
  Speaker 4: And her stepfamily.
• 14:51
  Speaker 6: And if you guys have anything you'd like to add, if,
• 14:53
  Speaker 6: I don't know, you're step something, please let us know
• 14:55
  Speaker 6: down below. OP says, The party was amazing. Everyone had fun.
• 14:59
  Speaker 6: The games were a hit. And overall, I had a
• 15:02
  Speaker 6: great time. When bringing the cake to sing happy birthday,
• 15:05
  Speaker 6: I called for Lucy, but she wasn't in the party.
• 15:08
  Speaker 6: We looked for her around the house, but she wasn't
• 15:11
  Speaker 6: there and neither was my husband. After half an hour
• 15:15
  Speaker 6: of trying to call them both on their phones, the
• 15:17
  Speaker 6: mood got ruined and everyone left.
• 15:20
  Speaker 4: Okay.
• 15:21
  Speaker 6: Are we thinking OP is the a-hole right now?
• 15:26
  Speaker 5: No.
• 15:27
  Speaker 6: I know she's trying to do something nice, but the
• 15:30
  Speaker 6: one thing that's ringing bells in my head right now,
• 15:34
  Speaker 6: didn't run about the husband.
• 15:35
  Speaker 4: I think you just didn't anticipate the sass of a
• 15:40
  Speaker 4: 15-year-old girl who doesn't like you.
• 15:42
  Speaker 6: This is the equivalent of cooking a meal for someone
• 15:45
  Speaker 6: without asking what dietary restrictions they have.
• 15:49
  Speaker 2: Is it really?
• 15:50
  Speaker 6: I would say so. I mean, it's trying to throw
• 15:53
  Speaker 6: that party for your stepdaughter. Remember that one time we
• 15:55
  Speaker 6: threw a party for one of our friends? And how
• 15:57
  Speaker 6: that went?
• 15:59
  Speaker 5: Oh.
• 15:59
  Speaker 6: Remember that?
• 16:00
  Speaker 4: I do.
• 16:00
  Speaker 6: And we're never going to throw one for him again?
• 16:02
  Speaker 4: Well, that was more of a guest list problem. But
• 16:06
  Speaker 4: I guess that's also the problem here because the guest
• 16:08
  Speaker 4: list is what she came with her friends. So now
• 16:11
  Speaker 4: she's like the embarrassed 15 year old.
• 16:14
  Speaker 6: The two returned after the midnight and didn't felt guilty
• 16:17
  Speaker 6: about leaving. I immediately asked them why they left. Lucy
• 16:21
  Speaker 6: didn't say anything and went to her bedroom. And my
• 16:23
  Speaker 6: husband told me to calm down. He explained that Lucy
• 16:26
  Speaker 6: wasn't feeling well. So they went to the beach. I
• 16:29
  Speaker 6: scolded him for not telling me, but he just shrugged
• 16:32
  Speaker 6: and said, you were too busy and joined the party
• 16:34
  Speaker 6: to notice. and went to sleep. It was a little crazy.
• 16:37
  Speaker 6: It took you a little bit to notice they weren't there.
• 16:39
  Speaker 4: Well, I mean, when you throw a big party, there's
• 16:42
  Speaker 4: a lot going on as the host, but.
• 16:44
  Speaker 6: You're keeping an eye for the people that it's thrown for.
• 16:47
  Speaker 4: That is true. That is also very true.
• 16:51
  Speaker 6: I don't understand why they both disrespected me like that.
• 16:53
  Speaker 6: I invested a lot of time and money into the party,
• 16:57
  Speaker 6: and they haven't even apologized for leaving. It's been three days,
• 17:01
  Speaker 6: and the two act as if nothing happened. When I
• 17:03
  Speaker 6: try to talk about it, Lucy looks at me like
• 17:06
  Speaker 6: I'm crazy, and my husband doesn't call her out on it.
• 17:09
  Speaker 6: I'm tired of her indifference. I threatened my husband to
• 17:12
  Speaker 6: take Toby and leave if they didn't open up about it,
• 17:14
  Speaker 6: but he, surprise, shrugged and told me to calm down.
• 17:18
  Speaker 6: I love them both, but this party disaster has made
• 17:22
  Speaker 6: me believe it's not reciprocated, and I'm seriously considering getting
• 17:26
  Speaker 6: a divorce.
• 17:27
  Speaker 5: Advice.
• 17:27
  Speaker 6: We have an update. Okay, okay, okay.
• 17:31
  Speaker 4: I think I've got it.
• 17:32
  Speaker 5: Yeah, me too. What do you got, Riley?
• 17:34
  Speaker 6: Me too. I can see this as clear as day.
• 17:36
  Speaker 6: Opie wants to show affection to Lucy and wants Lucy
• 17:40
  Speaker 6: to also show it back to her. So Opie, what
• 17:43
  Speaker 6: she does, this feels like a TV show. Opie makes
• 17:46
  Speaker 6: this grand, awesome thing with a lot of time and effort,
• 17:49
  Speaker 6: hoping Lucy will like it. But it's like having a
• 17:54
  Speaker 6: vanilla ice cream cake when someone likes chocolate strawberry cake.
• 17:59
  Speaker 6: they're not going to, it's not going to match. It's
• 18:01
  Speaker 6: not a match because Lucy don't know what her deal is,
• 18:04
  Speaker 6: but I'm pretty sure she has a strained relationship with
• 18:05
  Speaker 6: you because of her mother and growing up. Well, yeah.
• 18:08
  Speaker 4: The fact that she only refers to you as my
• 18:11
  Speaker 4: dad's wife and her son.
• 18:14
  Speaker 6: Yeah. So that's happening and there's not a meshing happening.
• 18:17
  Speaker 6: And then the husband doesn't seem to really, it's more
• 18:21
  Speaker 6: like husband and Lucy versus the world rather than you
• 18:25
  Speaker 6: OP and husband versus the world. Those are the things
• 18:28
  Speaker 6: I am seeing into play here.
• 18:29
  Speaker 4: Yeah, which I get, and I kind of get that. Again,
• 18:34
  Speaker 4: I don't have kids, but if I put myself in
• 18:36
  Speaker 4: the situation, I'd have to back up my daughter. But
• 18:40
  Speaker 4: I think the main problem here is there's not enough
• 18:45
  Speaker 4: communication going on between OP and her husband in terms
• 18:48
  Speaker 4: of just the situation. He just keeps being like, just relax, stop,
• 18:54
  Speaker 4: calm down. And it's like, You just need to get clear, like,
• 18:57
  Speaker 4: I really don't like the way Lucy thinks about us
• 19:00
  Speaker 4: and treats us, me and Toby. You can't change that, though.
• 19:04
  Speaker 4: There's nothing you can really do to force her to
• 19:07
  Speaker 4: play nice with you guys.
• 19:09
  Speaker 6: From what I've seen, it's more of an over time
• 19:12
  Speaker 6: kind of thing.
• 19:12
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 19:13
  Speaker 4: She's 15. She's going to be out of the house
• 19:15
  Speaker 4: in three years. Like, she could come around, but you
• 19:19
  Speaker 4: just got to get clear with your husband that's how
• 19:21
  Speaker 4: you feel. And you did this whole big thing for
• 19:23
  Speaker 4: her and she didn't want it or care about it.
• 19:25
  Speaker 4: So now you know, hey- You don't need to do
• 19:27
  Speaker 4: that next time. But, you know, it needs to be.
• 19:31
  Speaker 5: I don't.
• 19:32
  Speaker 4: Don't divorce over it.
• 19:34
  Speaker 5: Right.
• 19:34
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 19:34
  Speaker 4: You're a kid.
• 19:36
  Speaker 5: Calm down.
• 19:37
  Speaker 6: It's been a very difficult week and I thought I'd
• 19:39
  Speaker 6: update you all on it. I appreciate all the comments
• 19:42
  Speaker 6: and they were helpful in me realizing several things. This
• 19:46
  Speaker 6: first is that the party was never really for Lucy.
• 19:49
  Speaker 5: I could.
• 19:49
  Speaker 6: See that.
• 19:50
  Speaker 4: Ooh, he clocked you on that one.
• 19:53
  Speaker 6: You see, this year I asked my husband to throw
• 19:55
  Speaker 6: me a birthday party. I had high expectations, and it
• 19:59
  Speaker 6: turned out to be a small gathering with less than
• 20:01
  Speaker 6: 10 people, no decorations, and a supermarket cake since my
• 20:05
  Speaker 6: husband started planning three days before. This party was a
• 20:08
  Speaker 6: redemption for me, and I'll admit it. The second thing
• 20:12
  Speaker 6: is how intrusive I've been with Lucy, but I've been
• 20:15
  Speaker 6: that girl's life for seven years. I watched her grow up,
• 20:18
  Speaker 6: and I love her. It's not easy for me to
• 20:20
  Speaker 6: see how she ignores me, how she rejects my son,
• 20:23
  Speaker 6: and the lack of love that she has for us.
• 20:26
  Speaker 6: I apologized to her, and she didn't say anything. Is
• 20:29
  Speaker 6: Lucy just Wednesday from the Addams Family?
• 20:32
  Speaker 4: She's definitely given off that aura. My life's in pieces.
• 20:36
  Speaker 4: I just think she really just doesn't want a new family.
• 20:40
  Speaker 4: I don't know, man. It's hard in meshing families. I
• 20:44
  Speaker 4: think you guys could definitely do with therapy.
• 20:47
  Speaker 6: The best adaptation is Blended with Adam Sandler and Drew
• 20:51
  Speaker 6: Barrymore starring Shaquille O'Neal.
• 20:54
  Speaker 4: Blended? What do you mean?
• 20:56
  Speaker 6: They go to a trip to Africa and it's just
• 20:58
  Speaker 6: two families and they blend together. And guess who's in it?
• 21:02
  Speaker 5: What?
• 21:02
  Speaker 6: Zendaya's co-host from... No, not Just Dance. What's that one?
• 21:06
  Speaker 6: Bella Thorne. She's in it. And guess what she is?
• 21:09
  Speaker 5: A baller.
• 21:09
  Speaker 6: A basketball player. And Adam Sandler is her father.
• 21:13
  Speaker 4: Makes sense. Adam Sandler will always take any role about basketball.
• 21:17
  Speaker 6: So, two days after my first post, a woman called
• 21:21
  Speaker 6: saying that Lucy didn't attend her therapy session that week.
• 21:25
  Speaker 6: I asked my husband about it. He admitted that she
• 21:28
  Speaker 6: has social anxiety.
• 21:29
  Speaker 4: All right, she's already in therapy. New therapist alert. It's
• 21:33
  Speaker 4: time for a new therapist. She's been in therapy for
• 21:37
  Speaker 4: how long? She's known you for seven years. She still
• 21:39
  Speaker 4: doesn't like you. What's her therapist doing? Therapist needs to
• 21:42
  Speaker 4: push back.
• 21:43
  Speaker 6: Yeah, there's a goal. Does she have a reason to
• 21:47
  Speaker 6: not like you? Which made her uncomfortable being at a
• 21:50
  Speaker 6: crowded party, so they left. That broke my heart. I
• 21:53
  Speaker 6: asked my husband why he didn't tell me, and he
• 21:56
  Speaker 6: said she didn't want me to tell you, so I didn't.
• 21:59
  Speaker 6: I couldn't believe it. I don't think she wants you
• 22:01
  Speaker 6: to know anything.
• 22:02
  Speaker 4: That was just, you can't believe what? That her dad, like,
• 22:06
  Speaker 4: respected her wishes? Come on now.
• 22:08
  Speaker 6: And in a marriage, I would say, hey, Lucy doesn't
• 22:12
  Speaker 6: like being in party. No, no, doesn't like being in crowns.
• 22:15
  Speaker 6: That'd be good to know.
• 22:16
  Speaker 4: No, you can say that. No, I think she's just
• 22:19
  Speaker 4: talking about when they left.
• 22:21
  Speaker 5: Oh.
• 22:21
  Speaker 4: Yeah, it's like, that's good on the dad, because clearly
• 22:25
  Speaker 4: she's a bit of a moody individual. And she's 15.
• 22:29
  Speaker 4: And it's like, that's not the point where you want
• 22:31
  Speaker 4: to like break your daughter's trust.
• 22:33
  Speaker 6: Last Friday, I got the bill for the party. It
• 22:35
  Speaker 6: was more expensive than I thought. Around five figures.
• 22:39
  Speaker 5: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. What? What? Whoa.
• 22:43
  Speaker 4: Hold on now. You spent 10 racks on a party?
• 22:47
  Speaker 6: I think we see more of the problem now.
• 22:50
  Speaker 4: Yeah. Oh my God. You spent 10 racks with no money.
• 22:55
  Speaker 4: confirmation that she would like the party?
• 22:58
  Speaker 6: There's so much wrong with this family. I also see
• 23:00
  Speaker 6: why you didn't notice Lucy and dad left.
• 23:03
  Speaker 4: Oh no, yeah, because, oh, because this was also, you're
• 23:07
  Speaker 4: a party monster. You said this was a party, this
• 23:09
  Speaker 4: was to make up for your party. No.
• 23:12
  Speaker 6: And I discussed it with my husband. He couldn't believe
• 23:16
  Speaker 6: that I spent so much money and he immediately stipulated
• 23:19
  Speaker 6: that he won't give me a penny since it was
• 23:22
  Speaker 6: my idea and and I did it without anyone's permission.
• 23:25
  Speaker 6: We fought about it since, I don't have that much,
• 23:28
  Speaker 6: and he was adamant. He told me with that money
• 23:31
  Speaker 6: we could have renovated the house, or had a family trip,
• 23:34
  Speaker 6: and it's my problem. Upon insisting, he said something along
• 23:37
  Speaker 6: the lines of, we weren't even at your stupid party,
• 23:40
  Speaker 6: so stop bothering me. We fought about it, I yelled
• 23:44
  Speaker 6: at him that Lucy will never see us as a family,
• 23:46
  Speaker 6: or see me as a parent if he acts that way.
• 23:49
  Speaker 6: He said that he didn't marry me, looking for a
• 23:51
  Speaker 6: new mom for Lucy, And that if I keep trying
• 23:54
  Speaker 6: to meddle in her business and doing stupid things, quoting
• 23:57
  Speaker 6: the party, then we're done because he's sick of my
• 24:00
  Speaker 6: stupidity and that I embarrassed them.
• 24:03
  Speaker 4: Okay, so not going to lie, he kind of cooked
• 24:07
  Speaker 4: a little bit. Like what you guys are talking about
• 24:09
  Speaker 4: is exactly what needs to be said, but y'all are
• 24:11
  Speaker 4: now saying it in like anger and frustration. Like he did.
• 24:14
  Speaker 4: He's like, you don't have to be Lucy's mom. She
• 24:16
  Speaker 4: doesn't have to love you guys. Like she, you know,
• 24:18
  Speaker 4: she's part of your family, but it shouldn't be said
• 24:20
  Speaker 4: like this.
• 24:22
  Speaker 6: Everyone in this family, including Toby, so this doesn't happen
• 24:25
  Speaker 6: to him, needs to go to people school and understand
• 24:27
  Speaker 6: how to talk to people in a people-y manner. You know?
• 24:31
  Speaker 6: The people school.
• 24:32
  Speaker 2: No one's talking.
• 24:33
  Speaker 6: This is all building up resentment.
• 24:35
  Speaker 4: And also, girl, you are out of line after spending
• 24:40
  Speaker 4: almost $ 10, 000 and having any level of resistance to just
• 24:46
  Speaker 4: being like, yeah, that was my mistake. I was wrong
• 24:49
  Speaker 4: for that.
• 24:50
  Speaker 6: I don't even know how to throw a party spending $ 10, 000.
• 24:53
  Speaker 4: Yeah, where did the money go? Did you hire the
• 24:56
  Speaker 4: Blue Man Group? Who did you hire for this party?
• 25:00
  Speaker 6: Also, I got a quote for you.
• 25:01
  Speaker 5: You ready? Onyx.
• 25:03
  Speaker 4: A quote for the cost of the blue man group?
• 25:05
  Speaker 5: No, no, no, no.
• 25:07
  Speaker 4: Are you in tight with the blue?
• 25:09
  Speaker 5: The blumens? What? A quote?
• 25:11
  Speaker 4: Give me the quote.
• 25:12
  Speaker 6: Oh, it's along the lines of unsaid expectations creates resentment.
• 25:18
  Speaker 4: Ah, yeah.
• 25:18
  Speaker 6: Oh, here we go. Unspoken expectations.
• 25:20
  Speaker 4: Yeah, that's, hey. And this is what it breeds. Yeah.
• 25:24
  Speaker 6: This is what it makes.
• 25:25
  Speaker 4: It's true. It's true.
• 25:27
  Speaker 6: That was it for me. So I took my son
• 25:30
  Speaker 6: and we left. I hadn't received a single call from him.
• 25:34
  Speaker 6: I saw on social media that they went out to dinner,
• 25:37
  Speaker 6: Lucy quoted, a good family time, and they both looked happy.
• 25:40
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I think, I think, the wrong person was in
• 25:44
  Speaker 4: therapy this whole time. Yeah, Lucy, you and your husband
• 25:48
  Speaker 4: needed to be in therapy, or counseling, just because it's crazy.
• 25:52
  Speaker 4: Can you go back to exactly what he said? Because
• 25:55
  Speaker 4: this man said exactly, like, just on the money what
• 25:59
  Speaker 4: should have been discussed. And it just came out so mean.
• 26:02
  Speaker 6: He said that he didn't marry me looking for a
• 26:04
  Speaker 6: new mom for Lucy, that if I keep trying to
• 26:06
  Speaker 6: meddle in her business and doing stupid things, then we're
• 26:09
  Speaker 6: done because he's sick of my stupidity and that I
• 26:12
  Speaker 6: embarrass them.
• 26:13
  Speaker 4: And so like translation, I love you no matter what,
• 26:17
  Speaker 4: even if you can't be Lucy's mom. And even though she,
• 26:23
  Speaker 4: you want her to feel this way about you, we can't,
• 26:27
  Speaker 4: control the way Lucy feels about anything. All we can
• 26:31
  Speaker 4: do is show up for her in the ways that
• 26:33
  Speaker 4: we can, and I want to do it together with you,
• 26:36
  Speaker 4: and it doesn't matter.
• 26:38
  Speaker 6: And you know how you translated that? People school.
• 26:41
  Speaker 4: People school!
• 26:43
  Speaker 6: It's clear that they don't care about us. Toby's unconsolable
• 26:46
  Speaker 6: over all of this, and so am I. My mom
• 26:49
  Speaker 6: insists that I find a divorce lawyer.
• 26:51
  Speaker 4: Oh boy, I really... I hope they stay together.
• 26:56
  Speaker 6: Dude, this dad doesn't even care. He did not console
• 26:59
  Speaker 6: his wife whatsoever doing any of this.
• 27:00
  Speaker 4: He does, though.
• 27:02
  Speaker 2: Not really.
• 27:02
  Speaker 4: He just cares more about his daughter, which is so fair.
• 27:06
  Speaker 4: That's so fair. And I would never be like, that's wrong.
• 27:09
  Speaker 6: I get that, but I don't think you should have
• 27:11
  Speaker 6: married someone if you're not at some level of being
• 27:15
  Speaker 6: considerate to their actions or speaking to them. They've gone
• 27:18
  Speaker 6: past that. Wait, what do you mean? Okay, I have
• 27:22
  Speaker 6: a child with my wife. My wife and I divorce.
• 27:26
  Speaker 6: I'm now left with the sole custody of my child.
• 27:28
  Speaker 6: I go out and I seek a new partner. I
• 27:31
  Speaker 6: find a new partner. I want to find a partner
• 27:33
  Speaker 6: that I love, adore, and cherish and want to be
• 27:36
  Speaker 6: with for the rest of my life. To be at
• 27:38
  Speaker 6: the same level, not more, not less, but at the
• 27:41
  Speaker 6: same level as my biological child. Meaning that I am one.
• 27:47
  Speaker 6: it's going to be hard for me and my biological
• 27:48
  Speaker 6: child going to this new family dynamic with this new woman,
• 27:51
  Speaker 6: but I want to be on the same level. I
• 27:53
  Speaker 6: see things with this new woman that I'm with so
• 27:56
  Speaker 6: that it doesn't create some weird dynamic of it's me
• 28:00
  Speaker 6: and my kid versus you. No, no, it's me and
• 28:01
  Speaker 6: the wife versus the world.
• 28:04
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I guess. I mean, I think it should be,
• 28:08
  Speaker 4: if he did feel like it's always going to be
• 28:11
  Speaker 4: Lucy above everyone else, you should let that be known.
• 28:16
  Speaker 4: And I'm sure it kind of is in a way. But, like,
• 28:20
  Speaker 4: they had all the pieces they needed to communicate this out.
• 28:23
  Speaker 4: They just needed to talk. Relationships are just mostly, like,
• 28:27
  Speaker 4: hard conversations.
• 28:29
  Speaker 6: So, update two. Hello, it's been a while. And it's
• 28:32
  Speaker 6: been pretty stressful. But I don't want to leave this unfinished.
• 28:36
  Speaker 6: To begin with, he told me that he's willing to
• 28:38
  Speaker 6: work things out between us. But I can't keep meddling
• 28:41
  Speaker 6: on Lucy's personal affairs anymore. or spending big money on
• 28:45
  Speaker 6: stupid crap behind his back. That pissed me off a bit.
• 28:48
  Speaker 4: Okay, no. No, no, no. He is correct.
• 28:52
  Speaker 6: Even though it was a very big event, and it
• 28:55
  Speaker 6: didn't turn out the way I wanted it to, it
• 28:58
  Speaker 6: was done with good intentions, and maybe if he had
• 29:00
  Speaker 6: thrown me a proper birthday, I wouldn't have done it.
• 29:03
  Speaker 4: Okay, I really am not liking your complete refusal to
• 29:09
  Speaker 4: just own that that was a mistake.
• 29:12
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 29:12
  Speaker 4: That was a selfish mistake.
• 29:14
  Speaker 6: Baffled by how we could get to that many figures
• 29:17
  Speaker 6: for a party.
• 29:18
  Speaker 4: Who, what, who?
• 29:20
  Speaker 6: Five figures.
• 29:21
  Speaker 4: How many ice sculptures? They had the Harlem Globetrotters.
• 29:25
  Speaker 6: I make five figures a year.
• 29:27
  Speaker 4: Yeah, it's just like spending like a.
• 29:29
  Speaker 6: This party was five figures. I can only imagine how
• 29:32
  Speaker 6: much this dad makes.
• 29:34
  Speaker 4: For it to not be an immediate, like, what did
• 29:37
  Speaker 4: you do? Get out of my house. He must make
• 29:41
  Speaker 4: a lot.
• 29:42
  Speaker 6: He laughed and said he couldn't believe this was all
• 29:45
  Speaker 6: about a stupid party and suggested that I should grow
• 29:48
  Speaker 6: up since people our age have better things to think about.
• 29:51
  Speaker 6: And it's silly that I got so many hopes up
• 29:53
  Speaker 6: just for a party. At that moment, I realized it
• 29:56
  Speaker 6: would work.
• 29:57
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I was about to say the same thing.
• 29:59
  Speaker 6: Because At the beginning, she always throws a big birthday
• 30:02
  Speaker 6: party and that's really big to her. A celebration of life.
• 30:05
  Speaker 6: I'm translating this. I can see you, girl.
• 30:07
  Speaker 4: He refuses to see you and you also kind of
• 30:10
  Speaker 4: refuse to see him. And that just means... And if
• 30:15
  Speaker 4: you know that that's never going to change, then it's
• 30:17
  Speaker 4: not going to work. You should have just thrown her
• 30:19
  Speaker 4: a birthday party, man.
• 30:20
  Speaker 5: You would have had a wife.
• 30:21
  Speaker 6: Even if birthdays are silly to some people, they're important
• 30:24
  Speaker 6: to me. And he can't respect that. Maybe he never
• 30:28
  Speaker 6: really knew me. and only married me, so he wouldn't
• 30:30
  Speaker 6: be alone. He never stepped out of his comfort zone
• 30:33
  Speaker 6: to do anything for me, and Lucy pretends that me
• 30:36
  Speaker 6: and my son don't exist. All the love I had
• 30:39
  Speaker 6: for the two of them have vanished. We officially divorced
• 30:42
  Speaker 6: last week. He didn't fight me about anything, because we
• 30:45
  Speaker 6: signed a prenup. He just demanded not to pay for
• 30:48
  Speaker 6: my party expenses. My few savings and some loans went
• 30:52
  Speaker 6: to pay the expenses of the party, and it was
• 30:55
  Speaker 6: all for nothing.
• 30:56
  Speaker 4: Well, no, you remember you had a fun party, right?
• 30:59
  Speaker 6: And you realize you can't be with this man for
• 31:02
  Speaker 6: the rest of your life. Yeah.
• 31:03
  Speaker 4: And I got to say, yeah, you know, like we say,
• 31:06
  Speaker 4: we're not experts, but it's like you've got like this
• 31:09
  Speaker 4: context of like your stepdaughter, like any kid, any teenager
• 31:13
  Speaker 4: who's like, I don't like you. It's like the harder
• 31:16
  Speaker 4: you try to make them like you, the less they're
• 31:19
  Speaker 4: going to like you. Like you just have to let
• 31:21
  Speaker 4: that go and be like, you know, I can't. I
• 31:25
  Speaker 4: can't control this.
• 31:27
  Speaker 6: My son is devastated that he no longer is living
• 31:29
  Speaker 6: with his stepdad. My ex offered joint custody, but I
• 31:33
  Speaker 6: want us to stay away from that family. I hope
• 31:35
  Speaker 6: one day my son understands why I did it. Although
• 31:38
  Speaker 6: my ex loved him, I don't think he's a good person.
• 31:41
  Speaker 4: Bro, honestly, I'm sorry. I just had to say this.
• 31:46
  Speaker 4: You're wrong for that. 100% wrong for that. That's crazy.
• 31:50
  Speaker 4: You're like, my son has a father figure that he's like,
• 31:55
  Speaker 4: is distraught about losing, and you had the ability to
• 31:59
  Speaker 4: keep him in his life, and you said, no, because
• 32:02
  Speaker 4: his daughter doesn't like us. It's like, come on. It's
• 32:05
  Speaker 4: all selfish. Everything you've done in this story is selfish.
• 32:08
  Speaker 6: A lot of people got a lot of loose screws,
• 32:10
  Speaker 6: and I hope Toby makes it out okay. Lucy didn't
• 32:13
  Speaker 6: say anything when we went to pack our things. Lucy
• 32:17
  Speaker 6: will never speak a word.
• 32:18
  Speaker 5: Ever.
• 32:19
  Speaker 4: Yeah, Lucy is silent.
• 32:21
  Speaker 6: Lucy had no dialogue in any of this.
• 32:23
  Speaker 4: She's a Tibetan monk.
• 32:24
  Speaker 6: Later on social media, she posted a photo with my
• 32:27
  Speaker 6: ex captioning, my family is happy again. She's just trying
• 32:31
  Speaker 6: to get at you. Leave her alone.
• 32:32
  Speaker 4: You're literally getting outplayed by a 15-year-old's subliminal social media messages. Like,
• 32:40
  Speaker 4: stop it.
• 32:41
  Speaker 6: That really hurt, so I blocked her. I didn't expect
• 32:43
  Speaker 6: a tearful farewell, but at least she felt something. But nothing.
• 32:48
  Speaker 6: Before we got married, it was just the two of them.
• 32:51
  Speaker 6: We were just nuisance to her. And now that she
• 32:53
  Speaker 6: got rid of us, she's happy.
• 32:55
  Speaker 5: That's all.
• 32:56
  Speaker 6: This all has been very painful, but I hope that
• 32:59
  Speaker 6: in the long run, it will be best for me
• 33:01
  Speaker 6: and my son. I'll focus on being a good mother
• 33:03
  Speaker 6: to him for now. Thanks for all the comments. I
• 33:06
  Speaker 6: don't know if we learned anything. I don't think anyone
• 33:08
  Speaker 6: here learned anything.
• 33:09
  Speaker 4: Good luck, Toby. That's what I'm learning.
• 33:11
  Speaker 6: Yeah, that's the only person I can hope life turns
• 33:15
  Speaker 6: okay for them.
• 33:16
  Speaker 4: I just think OP is a person who doesn't take
• 33:21
  Speaker 4: any accountability seriously. for their own stuff while also being
• 33:25
  Speaker 4: like very justice oriented because OP feels they're being slighted
• 33:31
  Speaker 4: and it's not right that Lucy doesn't like them. And
• 33:35
  Speaker 4: it's created all of this turmoil. And the fact that
• 33:38
  Speaker 4: you just couldn't get on the stage, your husband couldn't
• 33:40
  Speaker 4: talk to you with empathy. That's that sucks. Your husband
• 33:42
  Speaker 4: also sucked, but like you're firmly in the selfishly existing camp,
• 33:49
  Speaker 4: which you're not alone, but. Selfish 101, the story. How
• 33:53
  Speaker 4: to be selfish.
• 33:54
  Speaker 5: That was wild.
• 33:54
  Speaker 6: That was crazy. We're doing okay, OP. And we've got
• 33:59
  Speaker 6: another story. You're doing what? You heard me. Hey, this
• 34:04
  Speaker 6: is Riley, your favorite Southern belle. We're going to get
• 34:07
  Speaker 6: back to these stories, but here's three minutes worth of
• 34:09
  Speaker 6: ads from our sponsors.
• 34:12
  Speaker 4: My father-in-law stormed out of my birthday dinner and accused
• 34:16
  Speaker 4: me of something awful.
• 34:17
  Speaker 6: Wasn't really your birthday, huh?
• 34:19
  Speaker 4: This evening, my fiancé, 24, sister-in-law, 21, mother-in-law, 60-ish, and father-in-law, 60-ish,
• 34:27
  Speaker 4: and I, 24, were meeting up for a belated birthday dinner.
• 34:31
  Speaker 5: Yay!
• 34:32
  Speaker 4: I was on edge going into it because father-in-law has
• 34:35
  Speaker 4: been arguing with sister-in-law's boyfriend, so I figured they would
• 34:39
  Speaker 4: try to bring it up.
• 34:40
  Speaker 2: Oh, boy.
• 34:41
  Speaker 4: You gross. Why would you bring up the... Don't bring
• 34:45
  Speaker 4: up problems at dinner. I had told them this past
• 34:47
  Speaker 4: weekend that I was not going to discuss it with
• 34:49
  Speaker 4: them because it wasn't my place. I wish it had
• 34:52
  Speaker 4: been something that small, truly. I would like to preface
• 34:56
  Speaker 4: this by saying they chose the restaurant. I had originally
• 34:59
  Speaker 4: chosen a Mexican restaurant, but his mom is trying a
• 35:02
  Speaker 4: gluten-free diet, so she asked if we could specifically go
• 35:04
  Speaker 4: to this brewery because they have gluten-free options. At the brewery?
• 35:08
  Speaker 6: Let me tell you something. Did you know that instead
• 35:11
  Speaker 6: of getting a flour tortilla, you can get a corn one?
• 35:13
  Speaker 4: Yeah, then there's no gluten in there. I was about
• 35:15
  Speaker 4: to say, you can just not get gluten. She's a
• 35:17
  Speaker 4: gluten newbie, dude. I've learned that some battles with them
• 35:21
  Speaker 4: are not worth the fight even when it's my own
• 35:23
  Speaker 4: birthday dinner and I don't really like the restaurant. One
• 35:27
  Speaker 4: important piece of context here, the restaurant was a brewery
• 35:30
  Speaker 4: and mother-in-law and father-in-law don't drink at all. Mother-in-law will
• 35:33
  Speaker 4: occasionally try a sip of what sister-in-law orders, but that's
• 35:36
  Speaker 4: the full extent of her drinking. We get to the
• 35:38
  Speaker 4: brewery and all of us order water except sister-in-law who
• 35:41
  Speaker 4: gets a martini. When mother-in-law and father-in-law pay for dinner
• 35:46
  Speaker 4: and she gets a drink, she has to pay them
• 35:48
  Speaker 4: back for it. The same would apply to us, though
• 35:51
  Speaker 4: fiancé and I don't drink much anyway. This isn't how
• 35:54
  Speaker 4: my family does it. My parents will flat out refuse
• 35:57
  Speaker 4: to let anyone even try to pay them. And I
• 35:59
  Speaker 4: know I'm spoiled in that, but it still surprised me.
• 36:02
  Speaker 4: The first time they did this in front of me
• 36:04
  Speaker 4: was at sister-in-law's 21st birthday dinner? And then they got
• 36:08
  Speaker 4: mad that I Venmo'd her the cost of her drink
• 36:11
  Speaker 4: as a gift. You didn't pay for her drink on
• 36:14
  Speaker 4: her 21st birthday?
• 36:16
  Speaker 6: I'm gonna tell you why, Dakota. It's because they're Christian.
• 36:20
  Speaker 5: Mmm.
• 36:21
  Speaker 4: They don't believe in loans? Or no, that's they don't
• 36:23
  Speaker 4: believe in interest on loans.
• 36:25
  Speaker 5: Uh.
• 36:26
  Speaker 6: Yeah, dude. One time my brother got an interest from
• 36:28
  Speaker 6: my grandpa. Did not have to pay any loan.
• 36:31
  Speaker 5: I mean.
• 36:31
  Speaker 6: I had to get a loan from my grandpa to
• 36:32
  Speaker 6: pay any interest.
• 36:34
  Speaker 4: That's the best kind of loan. The family loan discount
• 36:38
  Speaker 4: of zero dollar interest. By the way, this comes from
• 36:41
  Speaker 4: Mothman's Dealer. And if you want to submit your own stories,
• 36:43
  Speaker 4: go to our subreddit. I'm Dakota.
• 36:45
  Speaker 6: I'm Riley.
• 36:46
  Speaker 4: And this is OK Storytime. We're going to read this
• 36:48
  Speaker 4: story and we're going to have our thoughts and we're
• 36:50
  Speaker 4: going to say them out loud. And you get to
• 36:52
  Speaker 4: have yours in the comments and tell us if you
• 36:54
  Speaker 4: agree or disagree.
• 36:56
  Speaker 6: OP says.
• 36:58
  Speaker 4: Anyway, the martini arrives and sister-in-law doesn't really like it.
• 37:01
  Speaker 4: She said it was too strong, but still tries to
• 37:04
  Speaker 4: drink it. She said the martini was too strong. Does
• 37:06
  Speaker 4: she know what a martini is?
• 37:08
  Speaker 6: Yeah, a fun drink.
• 37:10
  Speaker 4: They don't really taste great. Give me a long time
• 37:13
  Speaker 4: to learn how to drink a martini. The conversation moves
• 37:16
  Speaker 4: to us discussing different kinds of drinks since my fiance
• 37:20
  Speaker 4: is literally a bartender and this is important for later.
• 37:23
  Speaker 4: A few sips in, she decides the drink really isn't
• 37:25
  Speaker 4: for her and my fiance nudges her to send it back.
• 37:28
  Speaker 4: She was nervous about doing it and suddenly father-in-law gets
• 37:30
  Speaker 4: close to her and begins scolding her about how if
• 37:34
  Speaker 4: she's mature enough to drink, she needs to be mature
• 37:36
  Speaker 4: enough to send the drink back. He's not entirely wrong,
• 37:39
  Speaker 4: but his approach and how intensely he went about it
• 37:42
  Speaker 4: Was wrong. Sister-in-law gets upset, stands, says she needs a minute,
• 37:46
  Speaker 4: and exits the restaurant to calm down. Father-in-law then stands up,
• 37:49
  Speaker 4: grabs his jacket, and says he's going to the car.
• 37:52
  Speaker 4: He looks at fiance and me and yells that we
• 37:54
  Speaker 4: need to grow up, that sister-in-law's bio mom had a
• 37:59
  Speaker 4: problem with drinking, and that we're encouraging her into that lifestyle.
• 38:04
  Speaker 4: Both fiance and sister-in-law are adopted.
• 38:06
  Speaker 5: Um.
• 38:07
  Speaker 6: Okay, well, this dude's definitely from the, he feels like
• 38:11
  Speaker 6: my neighbor. This guy's definitely my neighbor.
• 38:13
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 38:13
  Speaker 6: Because people in the South act like that. You know
• 38:15
  Speaker 6: what I told my grandpa? I called him the other day, said, hey,
• 38:18
  Speaker 6: I like to go out and I kind of get
• 38:19
  Speaker 6: bored because I don't drink. I only go out to
• 38:21
  Speaker 6: talk to girls, but I have a girlfriend. So I
• 38:23
  Speaker 6: just don't really go out as much. He said, grandson,
• 38:26
  Speaker 6: you don't know how happy that makes me to hear that.
• 38:31
  Speaker 4: That's the best thing I heard all year.
• 38:34
  Speaker 6: Kind of along those lines.
• 38:36
  Speaker 4: You're a good boy.
• 38:36
  Speaker 6: That's just how I would grow up.
• 38:38
  Speaker 4: You're a good boy.
• 38:39
  Speaker 6: If there's not a basketball court there, I probably won't
• 38:41
  Speaker 6: want to show up.
• 38:41
  Speaker 4: Yeah, you're really not missing anything when it comes to drinking, man.
• 38:44
  Speaker 5: Thanks, man.
• 38:45
  Speaker 4: He then says we shouldn't be laughing at him, which
• 38:48
  Speaker 4: we weren't. Fiance and I sit there stunned as he
• 38:51
  Speaker 4: walks out. After he left, mother-in-law first makes a few
• 38:55
  Speaker 4: comments about how their ride home will be uncomfortable, how
• 38:58
  Speaker 4: this is why her cortisol is high, and so on.
• 39:01
  Speaker 4: She tries to defend him, saying that sister-in-law's mom did
• 39:04
  Speaker 4: have a drinking problem, and I assured her that if
• 39:07
  Speaker 4: I thought sister-in-law was even remotely close to going down
• 39:10
  Speaker 4: that path, we would encourage her not to drink. To
• 39:13
  Speaker 4: my knowledge, sister-in-law drinks rarely, as fiancé and I do. Yeah,
• 39:17
  Speaker 4: because let's use a little context clues here. I don't
• 39:20
  Speaker 4: think she has a drinking problem. She took a sip
• 39:22
  Speaker 4: of the martini and went, ugh, it's too strong.
• 39:24
  Speaker 6: She did have a drinking problem. She'd be on her
• 39:26
  Speaker 6: third martini.
• 39:27
  Speaker 4: Yeah, if she had a drinking problem, she would have
• 39:28
  Speaker 4: had no problem drinking.
• 39:30
  Speaker 6: That.
• 39:30
  Speaker 4: Sister-in-law eventually comes back and apologizes for leaving, saying she
• 39:34
  Speaker 4: needed a moment. Mother-in-law tries to defend him again, but
• 39:38
  Speaker 4: sister-in-law and fiance both shut her down and say that
• 39:40
  Speaker 4: what father-in-law did was wrong. Mother-in-law then says he won't
• 39:45
  Speaker 4: leave the car until someone goes to get him. I
• 39:47
  Speaker 4: immediately know I'm not going to do that and neither
• 39:50
  Speaker 4: will fiance. She says he'll be upset if no one does.
• 39:53
  Speaker 4: And I tell her that if he stormed out to
• 39:54
  Speaker 4: the car, he needs to deal with the consequences of that.
• 39:57
  Speaker 6: Oh, and you said that?
• 39:58
  Speaker 5: Oh no. But it's true.
• 39:59
  Speaker 4: Let him sit there. He's throwing a tantrum like a
• 40:01
  Speaker 4: little baby.
• 40:02
  Speaker 6: So I don't know how you feel about this, but
• 40:05
  Speaker 6: I have been in the middle of family issues before
• 40:08
  Speaker 6: and I don't say a word. I just let them
• 40:10
  Speaker 6: deal with it. I'm just there. Unless one of them
• 40:13
  Speaker 6: asked me for my opinion, then I'll give it. Other
• 40:16
  Speaker 6: than that, I'm not saying a word.
• 40:17
  Speaker 4: I don't think I could hold my tongue. I think
• 40:19
  Speaker 4: I would have been in the same seat. It'd be
• 40:22
  Speaker 4: different if I wasn't married, but it's like in-law.
• 40:25
  Speaker 6: No, they are not married. They're fiancés.
• 40:28
  Speaker 4: Yeah, but it's like, you know, that's the plan.
• 40:31
  Speaker 6: They're not there yet, though.
• 40:32
  Speaker 4: But I'd be like, oh, unless this is my wife,
• 40:35
  Speaker 4: I'm not going out to the car. It's like, go
• 40:37
  Speaker 4: out to the car. It's your husband. You go out
• 40:39
  Speaker 4: to the car. It's your husband throwing the temper tantrum.
• 40:42
  Speaker 4: You go take care of it.
• 40:42
  Speaker 6: Yeah, that should be on you, girlfriend.
• 40:44
  Speaker 4: After around 15 to 20 minutes, sister-in-law gives in and
• 40:48
  Speaker 4: goes to get him. It's a poor thing. At this point,
• 40:50
  Speaker 4: I'm already done with the evening and can tell fiance
• 40:53
  Speaker 4: is too. Mother-in-law then tells fiance and me that we
• 40:56
  Speaker 4: should apologize and say we didn't know father-in-law's uncle had
• 41:01
  Speaker 4: liver problems from drinking.
• 41:05
  Speaker 6: Oh, I see what's happening. I see what's happening. Oh
• 41:07
  Speaker 6: my gosh. Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh. I've been
• 41:08
  Speaker 6: through the same thing as his father-in-law.
• 41:10
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 41:11
  Speaker 6: Holy cow. Okay, okay, okay, okay. So, growing up, my
• 41:15
  Speaker 6: dad was a drinker, and I had a really hard
• 41:17
  Speaker 6: time with that. So, when I was around 19 to
• 41:19
  Speaker 6: 20 in college, a lot of people around me started drinking,
• 41:22
  Speaker 6: and I cut a lot of people off just because
• 41:24
  Speaker 6: of that. Because I didn't know how to deal with it.
• 41:26
  Speaker 6: And then at one time in my life, there was
• 41:28
  Speaker 6: a big climax. It was kind of the reason why
• 41:30
  Speaker 6: my ex and I broke up. But it was around drinking. Like,
• 41:33
  Speaker 6: very weirdly around drinking. And it caused a rift between
• 41:36
  Speaker 6: me and her brother. And it was not good. Took
• 41:39
  Speaker 6: me being around... The fact that people's lives do not
• 41:44
  Speaker 6: get ruined by this and that it is not an
• 41:47
  Speaker 6: evil substance. It's basically how people interact with it.
• 41:51
  Speaker 4: There's a spectrum.
• 41:52
  Speaker 6: Yeah. Like for a long time, I thought it was
• 41:54
  Speaker 6: the evil liquor. It takes everyone with them and it
• 41:59
  Speaker 6: leaves a path of destruction.
• 42:02
  Speaker 4: Which it can. It can. And that's all I've been around.
• 42:05
  Speaker 6: But now I've been around people who have a healthy
• 42:06
  Speaker 6: relationship with alcohol.
• 42:07
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 42:08
  Speaker 6: And I see like, oh, it actually... It's just like
• 42:11
  Speaker 6: an energy drink to me. Yeah. If you do too much,
• 42:14
  Speaker 6: it's harmful.
• 42:14
  Speaker 4: It's real bad for your liver either way.
• 42:17
  Speaker 6: But it's, you know, it took a while. But this
• 42:20
  Speaker 6: guy has not had that thought process with him and
• 42:23
  Speaker 6: still sees it as the evil.
• 42:25
  Speaker 4: And you never know. He's clearly a very emotional guy.
• 42:28
  Speaker 4: People who aren't emotional don't go sit in the car
• 42:30
  Speaker 4: and wait for someone to come get them. That's an
• 42:32
  Speaker 4: emotional dude.
• 42:33
  Speaker 6: Look how I see him.
• 42:34
  Speaker 4: And it could be, you know, who knows? I know
• 42:36
  Speaker 4: that around, you know, if the uncle is no longer
• 42:40
  Speaker 4: with us, could be close to the anniversary of a
• 42:43
  Speaker 4: passing or who knows? But he could be extra sensitive
• 42:46
  Speaker 4: to it right now.
• 42:47
  Speaker 6: It's true.
• 42:48
  Speaker 4: But either way, very out of pocket to do that
• 42:51
  Speaker 4: at like a birthday dinner. Like, come on, man, get
• 42:53
  Speaker 4: it together. I decide I'm not doing this. Father-in-law comes
• 42:57
  Speaker 4: back inside and makes a comment about how he didn't
• 42:59
  Speaker 4: want anyone laughing at him. to which mother-in-law tells him
• 43:02
  Speaker 4: no one was. Again, a little sensitive guy. At this point,
• 43:06
  Speaker 4: I almost stood up and left. During his absence, the
• 43:08
  Speaker 4: food came and we began eating. And the waiter stops
• 43:12
  Speaker 4: by and jokes that we were starting to think you
• 43:14
  Speaker 4: fell in. Oh, come on, dude.
• 43:16
  Speaker 6: Read the room. Yeah, dude. Not the time.
• 43:20
  Speaker 4: Not the time at all.
• 43:21
  Speaker 6: He's just trying to work on his bits.
• 43:24
  Speaker 4: He fell into his emotions. All of us except father-in-law
• 43:27
  Speaker 4: awkwardly laugh and father-in-law is clearly mad about it. He
• 43:31
  Speaker 4: doesn't say anything the rest of the meal except to
• 43:33
  Speaker 4: try to bring it up again. And fiance tells him
• 43:36
  Speaker 4: to drop it. So he doesn't say anything else.
• 43:39
  Speaker 6: It's also a narcissist that doesn't help with this.
• 43:41
  Speaker 4: It's true. Yeah, it's an emotional narcissist. The bill comes
• 43:46
  Speaker 4: and mother-in-law pays. And when it comes back, father-in-law quickly
• 43:48
  Speaker 4: grabs it and begins writing in the tip. I heard
• 43:51
  Speaker 4: mother-in-law say something along the lines of that's only 10%.
• 43:54
  Speaker 4: It should be more. And fiance says, we're going to
• 43:57
  Speaker 4: head out. To which mother-in-law gives us a cheery, we're
• 43:59
  Speaker 4: about to leave too, hang on. Which added to the lovely,
• 44:03
  Speaker 4: awkward air. We leave and father-in-law trails behind and stays
• 44:08
  Speaker 4: in the restaurant longer. Sister-in-law asks if he's telling a
• 44:11
  Speaker 4: joke or something, since father-in-law enjoys telling bad dad jokes
• 44:15
  Speaker 4: to staff, somewhat against their will. So he's usually the
• 44:18
  Speaker 4: guy saying someone fell in. That's why he actually got upset,
• 44:22
  Speaker 4: because he felt like he got Alphad.
• 44:24
  Speaker 6: Yeah, yeah, no, I.
• 44:25
  Speaker 4: He got out dad joked and shut down. That's actually
• 44:29
  Speaker 4: kind of absurd.
• 44:32
  Speaker 6: With families like this, it's like, eh.
• 44:34
  Speaker 4: You had a family member get mad at the waitstaff
• 44:37
  Speaker 4: for cracking jokes?
• 44:39
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 44:39
  Speaker 5: I love that.
• 44:40
  Speaker 6: I've seen it. You know also what happened to me
• 44:42
  Speaker 6: at a brewery? I invited this girl who I wanted
• 44:46
  Speaker 6: to take to prom with her parents. I asked her
• 44:49
  Speaker 6: in front of everyone if I could, and then she
• 44:51
  Speaker 6: came back with a no.
• 44:54
  Speaker 4: Oh, no. Let's find her. Let's find her and compare
• 44:58
  Speaker 4: our lives and see if she's better off.
• 45:00
  Speaker 6: Oh, dude, I do that all the time.
• 45:02
  Speaker 4: I don't actually know what he was actually doing. I
• 45:06
  Speaker 4: have a guess, but I'm letting that part go. I'm
• 45:09
  Speaker 4: sure he was berating them and be like, your waitstaff
• 45:12
  Speaker 4: is very unprofessional. Then we all went home and father-in-law
• 45:14
  Speaker 4: sent a half apology saying he wants to apologize for
• 45:17
  Speaker 4: leaving dinner in the middle. Fiance and I have agreed
• 45:20
  Speaker 4: to not respond or talk to them for a day
• 45:23
  Speaker 4: To let things cool off. Advice, please.
• 45:25
  Speaker 6: So, this being my family. Okay, this is what my
• 45:29
  Speaker 6: parents have done.
• 45:30
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 45:31
  Speaker 6: We've been a part of a family that kind of
• 45:33
  Speaker 6: pulls this crap. They just kind of go, not like
• 45:35
  Speaker 6: low contact, but they just kind of, every Sunday, we
• 45:38
  Speaker 6: will go to my grandparents' house and have lunch. My
• 45:42
  Speaker 6: parents now only go two Sundays out of the month.
• 45:45
  Speaker 6: And sometimes when it's bad, they'll only go one Sunday
• 45:47
  Speaker 6: out of the month. Oh, that's kind of what you
• 45:49
  Speaker 6: got to do with this family.
• 45:50
  Speaker 4: Kind of got to vibe it out.
• 45:51
  Speaker 6: Yep.
• 45:52
  Speaker 4: Vibe the schedule out.
• 45:53
  Speaker 6: And they're not like terrible. They're not just sometimes they
• 45:56
  Speaker 6: get so to be around.
• 45:59
  Speaker 4: Sometimes people are just. Yeah.
• 46:02
  Speaker 6: And I've realized you can't choose your family. You can
• 46:04
  Speaker 6: choose your friends. So I choose to be with friends
• 46:06
  Speaker 6: that I like to enjoy and that rejuvenate me. But
• 46:08
  Speaker 6: I do spend time with family because they're my family.
• 46:10
  Speaker 6: And it's not always bad, but sometimes they get in
• 46:12
  Speaker 6: their moods and it's like, what do you want me
• 46:15
  Speaker 6: to do?
• 46:15
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 46:16
  Speaker 6: One time my uncle punched me in the arm and
• 46:18
  Speaker 6: my mom went off on him and it was just
• 46:21
  Speaker 6: awkward for the rest of the night. He's like, you
• 46:22
  Speaker 6: don't like peanut butter?
• 46:23
  Speaker 5: Ugh.
• 46:23
  Speaker 6: And then I cried because it was a hard punch.
• 46:25
  Speaker 4: Oh, you should have just hit him back. I was 10. See,
• 46:27
  Speaker 4: I do love peanut butter. Uppercut to the nuts.
• 46:30
  Speaker 6: I couldn't do that. But when I turned 16, he
• 46:32
  Speaker 6: did something to me. He like annoyed me and I
• 46:35
  Speaker 6: got him back. And my mom got mad at me.
• 46:37
  Speaker 4: She was like, why did you do that to him?
• 46:39
  Speaker 6: I was like, you told me my whole life to
• 46:41
  Speaker 6: stick up for myself.
• 46:41
  Speaker 4: Do you not remember six years ago?
• 46:43
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 46:44
  Speaker 5: When I was struck.
• 46:46
  Speaker 6: Anyways, just slow contact.
• 46:49
  Speaker 4: Honestly, like advice would just be like, don't care. You
• 46:54
  Speaker 4: know what I mean? It's like, there's just, there's just nothing.
• 46:57
  Speaker 4: He's not going to stop being a moody little guy.
• 46:59
  Speaker 4: So you're just going to have to move with that understanding.
• 47:03
  Speaker 4: Update three weeks later. Yesterday was my wedding. Congratulations.
• 47:08
  Speaker 6: That was so fast.
• 47:10
  Speaker 4: And my fiance is officially my husband.
• 47:12
  Speaker 5: All right.
• 47:13
  Speaker 4: The day itself was amazing, and we are now on
• 47:15
  Speaker 4: our honeymoon.
• 47:16
  Speaker 6: Oh, let's go. I love that she told us who
• 47:19
  Speaker 6: we're going to be calling him now instead of fiance.
• 47:21
  Speaker 6: Thank you for clarifying that. Not a lot of people do.
• 47:23
  Speaker 4: He is husband now. Following the apology, everything was pretty
• 47:26
  Speaker 4: smooth leading up to the rehearsal dinner. Any conversation after
• 47:29
  Speaker 4: that pertained to questions and specifics about the dinner, and
• 47:33
  Speaker 4: then came the rehearsal dinner.
• 47:35
  Speaker 5: Oh, boy. Her response.
• 47:56
  Speaker 4: Was that she was wearing heels. During the dinner, father-in-law
• 47:59
  Speaker 4: made a speech, and it was admittedly tame. The only
• 48:02
  Speaker 4: part I disliked is when he made sure to say
• 48:04
  Speaker 4: at the end that he's proud of us, even though
• 48:07
  Speaker 4: husband doesn't always listen to his father.
• 48:10
  Speaker 5: But whatever.
• 48:11
  Speaker 4: Just gotta... That's all you gotta understand is when you
• 48:14
  Speaker 4: operate with your father-in-law, he's thinking about him. It's always
• 48:18
  Speaker 4: about him.
• 48:18
  Speaker 6: Yeah, and you can go long contact.
• 48:20
  Speaker 4: I'm not sure if I mentioned it before, but we
• 48:22
  Speaker 4: had decided on no dessert because all of the options,
• 48:25
  Speaker 4: or so I thought, included ice cream, and my husband
• 48:28
  Speaker 4: doesn't like ice cream due to teeth sensitivity. Super unfortunate.
• 48:32
  Speaker 6: Yeah, I have teeth sensitivity, but I lick it. I
• 48:35
  Speaker 6: use my tongue. I don't use my teeth.
• 48:37
  Speaker 5: The workaround.
• 48:38
  Speaker 4: At the time, they were tame about the decision and
• 48:41
  Speaker 4: didn't argue. So I figured it was fine. There's no
• 48:44
  Speaker 4: way your in-laws are about to throw a toddler tantrum
• 48:47
  Speaker 4: about no ice cream.
• 48:49
  Speaker 6: Dude, they threw a toddler tantrum over a martini.
• 48:51
  Speaker 4: No ice cream at the.
• 48:54
  Speaker 4: I was promised ice cream.
• 48:56
  Speaker 6: That martini's going to make you an alcoholic. Kill my brother.
• 48:59
  Speaker 4: Yeah, you can just be like, well, I just didn't
• 49:01
  Speaker 4: want anybody to get diabetes. I'm very sensitive about diabetes.
• 49:05
  Speaker 4: My aunt has diabetes. Dessert was not part of the
• 49:08
  Speaker 4: catering package, so we'd be ordering it individually anyway. During
• 49:12
  Speaker 4: the dinner, it was brought up by mother-in-law and father-in-law
• 49:14
  Speaker 4: no less than five times that I was the reason
• 49:18
  Speaker 4: we didn't have dessert. highlights include quote the powers that
• 49:22
  Speaker 4: be decided on no dessert smile even though you're not
• 49:26
  Speaker 4: getting dessert which was said during a picture and make
• 49:31
  Speaker 4: sure to go up to the buffet plenty since we
• 49:33
  Speaker 4: aren't getting dessert.
• 49:34
  Speaker 6: They're definitely from the south people from the south like
• 49:36
  Speaker 6: the desserts they like eating And they had a buffet? Dude, yeah, Georgia. Georgia,
• 49:41
  Speaker 6: South Carolina, Kentucky, something like that. Dude, these are my people.
• 49:44
  Speaker 6: People that know drinking. We're not doing that. There's alcohol.
• 49:51
  Speaker 6: Sick father-in-law and... Complain about no dessert? Dude, yeah, these
• 49:55
  Speaker 6: are my people.
• 49:56
  Speaker 4: No drinking, only ice cream.
• 49:57
  Speaker 6: That's from Wilkes County. Where y'all from?
• 50:00
  Speaker 4: So I said, cool. I ignored them. And I just
• 50:02
  Speaker 4: talked to my friends and family at the wedding. My
• 50:05
  Speaker 4: husband and I genuinely had a good time. We partied
• 50:08
  Speaker 4: with friends and had our donut truck. Woohoo! Yeah, donuts.
• 50:13
  Speaker 4: I was only aware of a few incidents, mainly minor.
• 50:16
  Speaker 4: The first was mother-in-law coming into the bridal suite when
• 50:18
  Speaker 4: I asked her not to, and my maid of honor
• 50:20
  Speaker 4: took care of that for me. The second was when
• 50:23
  Speaker 4: my officiant went into the grandparents' and parents' waiting room
• 50:26
  Speaker 4: to grab her bag, and mother-in-law looked at her and said,
• 50:29
  Speaker 4: you look comfortable. Just, again, being like, you're not looking
• 50:34
  Speaker 4: nice enough. I told the officiant to just let it be,
• 50:37
  Speaker 4: and the officiant told her she looks beautiful. Other than that,
• 50:40
  Speaker 4: the night went well. Father-in-law texted the night before, maybe
• 50:44
  Speaker 4: two nights before, and said he wanted to move on
• 50:46
  Speaker 4: and start fresh.
• 50:48
  Speaker 5: From what?
• 50:49
  Speaker 4: From his behavior, I guess. I love how he's saying
• 50:53
  Speaker 4: that like you have anything to do with it.
• 50:56
  Speaker 6: Start fresh.
• 50:57
  Speaker 1: What?
• 50:57
  Speaker 6: I'm confused.
• 50:58
  Speaker 4: I guess that's just, it's about him.
• 51:01
  Speaker 6: Also, there was a donut truck near my dad's barbershop.
• 51:05
  Speaker 6: It's called Amish Donuts.
• 51:07
  Speaker 4: Big old size of your head. That's a lot of donut.
• 51:11
  Speaker 5: Also, what do you mean?
• 51:12
  Speaker 4: These guys are being like, no dessert, no dessert. There
• 51:14
  Speaker 4: was a donut truck.
• 51:15
  Speaker 6: The next day, not at the rehearsal dinner.
• 51:17
  Speaker 2: Oh.
• 51:17
  Speaker 6: At the reception. Rehearsal dinner and reception are different.
• 51:20
  Speaker 4: I'm going to tell these people one thing. You got donuts.
• 51:23
  Speaker 4: You better be happy.
• 51:24
  Speaker 6: Yeah, you just had to wait one day.
• 51:26
  Speaker 4: Edit to add here at the very end. I guess
• 51:28
  Speaker 4: there was some confusion. There was dessert at the wedding.
• 51:31
  Speaker 4: Cake and cupcakes and donuts. There was just no dessert
• 51:35
  Speaker 4: at the rehearsal dinner. Come on.
• 51:38
  Speaker 6: Weird.
• 51:39
  Speaker 4: I also just noticed mother-in-law unfriended me on Facebook. which
• 51:42
  Speaker 4: I'm not really upset because I'm not going to ask
• 51:44
  Speaker 4: why and invite drama in. But father-in-law did this once
• 51:48
  Speaker 4: before as well. I can elaborate if anyone's interested. It's okay.
• 51:52
  Speaker 4: That's the end of that story.
• 51:53
  Speaker 6: We get it, we get it, we get it.
• 51:54
  Speaker 4: So it looks like father-in-law and mother-in-law are two little
• 51:57
  Speaker 4: perfect peas in a pod for each other.
• 51:58
  Speaker 6: Oh, God. I just hope you and your husband can
• 52:02
  Speaker 6: agree upon a right amount of times you see his
• 52:07
  Speaker 6: parents per year.
• 52:08
  Speaker 4: Yeah, a good low number.
• 52:11
  Speaker 6: You know what's going to be even better? Whenever OP
• 52:14
  Speaker 6: and her husband start to multiply.
• 52:17
  Speaker 4: Oh, yeah. That'll be a joy, navigating that with these guys.
• 52:23
  Speaker 4: That mother-in-law is like the... It's my baby. I'm parenting
• 52:27
  Speaker 4: this one, actually. It's not my granddaughter.
• 52:30
  Speaker 5: It's my daughter. Yikes! Good luck, OP.
• 52:32
  Speaker 4: Yes.
• 52:33
  Speaker 1: And that's the end of this story. Let's head to
• 52:35
  Speaker 1: the next one.
• 52:36
  Speaker 3: He wanted his deceased ex in our wedding video. I refused.
• 52:41
  Speaker 5: Oh, wonder what the vows are looking like. Oh, no.
• 52:44
  Speaker 3: My fiance was engaged for about a month to his
• 52:46
  Speaker 3: high school sweetheart when she passed away in a tragic
• 52:50
  Speaker 3: freak accident. I am so sorry. For personal reasons, I
• 52:53
  Speaker 3: don't want to get into how it happened, but it
• 52:55
  Speaker 3: was no one's fault. This was maybe six years ago.
• 52:57
  Speaker 3: Just for the purpose of the post, I'll call her Mandy.
• 53:00
  Speaker 3: My fiance has been very open about this loss and
• 53:03
  Speaker 3: how it's affected him throughout our relationship. I know he
• 53:06
  Speaker 3: misses her and the memories he has with her and
• 53:09
  Speaker 3: are important and special. I don't want to take anything
• 53:12
  Speaker 3: away or demean the relationship. And I've always been there
• 53:15
  Speaker 3: for him on hard days and supported him when he
• 53:17
  Speaker 3: needed it. We got engaged last year. The date is
• 53:20
  Speaker 3: to be decided still for obvious reasons. It was very
• 53:24
  Speaker 3: emotional for both of us and we've been really happy.
• 53:27
  Speaker 3: But since planning the wedding, I've been feeling like I'm
• 53:29
  Speaker 3: not only planning it for myself, but for Mandy as well.
• 53:33
  Speaker 3: It started as comments from his family. A lot of, oh,
• 53:36
  Speaker 3: Mandy would have loved this.
• 53:37
  Speaker 4: Type things.
• 53:38
  Speaker 3: I brushed it off at first and just thought it
• 53:40
  Speaker 3: was a way of them processing grief. I have a
• 53:42
  Speaker 3: great relationship with this family, but I know they loved
• 53:45
  Speaker 3: Mandy too. By the way, this comes from throwaway385647. And
• 53:48
  Speaker 3: if you want to submit your own stories, go to
• 53:51
  Speaker 3: the r slash okstorytime subreddit. I'm Sophia.
• 53:54
  Speaker 5: And I'm Mike.
• 53:55
  Speaker 2: And I'm Keon.
• 53:56
  Speaker 3: And we're here to give good advice goofily, but we
• 53:58
  Speaker 3: don't have all the answers. So if you've got answers,
• 54:00
  Speaker 3: give them here right now.
• 54:01
  Speaker 5: Please.
• 54:02
  Speaker 3: And Opie says, when I went dress shopping, his mom
• 54:04
  Speaker 3: and sister came. They kept talking about what dress Mandy
• 54:07
  Speaker 3: would have worn, what they could have seen her in.
• 54:10
  Speaker 2: Oh no.
• 54:11
  Speaker 3: It might seem like nothing, but it really overtook the conversation.
• 54:14
  Speaker 3: So much so that another bridesmaid told me later that
• 54:17
  Speaker 3: she felt uncomfortable for me too.
• 54:20
  Speaker 4: That's the worst.
• 54:20
  Speaker 3: You're getting secondhand uncomfortableness.
• 54:23
  Speaker 5: Oh, man. Talk about my life right there. I always
• 54:27
  Speaker 5: get second and third hand, first hand, too.
• 54:29
  Speaker 3: People are uncomfortable for you.
• 54:32
  Speaker 5: Every time they see me. It's like, oh, no.
• 54:35
  Speaker 3: Oh, no, we got to walk away.
• 54:37
  Speaker 5: We got to get out of here, dude.
• 54:39
  Speaker 3: It turned from harmless comments into focusing what should be
• 54:42
  Speaker 3: a special event for me into reminiscing over Mandy. My
• 54:45
  Speaker 3: latest project has been compiling old photos of me and
• 54:48
  Speaker 3: my fiance for a slideshow at the reception. Our rehearsal dinner,
• 54:51
  Speaker 3: we haven't decided. He told me there's something he's been
• 54:54
  Speaker 3: wanting to ask me. He really wants to include some
• 54:57
  Speaker 3: kind of in memory of Mandy into our wedding.
• 55:00
  Speaker 4: I think that's nice.
• 55:01
  Speaker 3: I think it's nice.
• 55:02
  Speaker 5: That's cute. That's a good gesture. Yeah. But what's up?
• 55:05
  Speaker 2: You're allowed to be, you can, you can also just
• 55:07
  Speaker 2: say no.
• 55:08
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 55:08
  Speaker 3: I think there is a way that you could still
• 55:11
  Speaker 3: honor her without having her be, you know, your guys's relationship.
• 55:15
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 55:16
  Speaker 3: Be overshadowed by Mandy.
• 55:18
  Speaker 5: Yeah. Yeah.
• 55:19
  Speaker 3: But it is a very delicate line.
• 55:22
  Speaker 5: Yeah. We're walking a fine line right here. I like it.
• 55:25
  Speaker 3: And thinks the slideshow would be a perfect place. At
• 55:28
  Speaker 3: this point, I was, and still kind of am, fed
• 55:30
  Speaker 3: up with the Mandy comments taking over our wedding. I
• 55:33
  Speaker 3: sternly told him that, no, I don't think that would
• 55:37
  Speaker 3: be appropriate, as this is our wedding and should focus
• 55:39
  Speaker 3: on us. We're having a table with pictures of loved
• 55:42
  Speaker 3: ones who've passed and she will be featured there. He
• 55:45
  Speaker 3: told me that he doesn't think that's enough to honor
• 55:47
  Speaker 3: her memory. He wants to incorporate her in a bigger way,
• 55:50
  Speaker 3: as she never got her dream wedding.
• 55:52
  Speaker 2: I don't, I don't know. I don't know how I
• 55:54
  Speaker 2: feel about that.
• 55:55
  Speaker 5: This is, yeah, this is like, it's like, first, I mean,
• 56:00
  Speaker 5: sorry for your loss, you know, but like, how do
• 56:03
  Speaker 5: other people, this, I think this is like out of
• 56:06
  Speaker 5: their business that they should be doing.
• 56:07
  Speaker 3: Yeah. I, I just think the, having her at the table,
• 56:13
  Speaker 3: you know, in memory of all those that we lost.
• 56:16
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 56:16
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 56:16
  Speaker 3: The second that it turns into like, oh, well, she
• 56:19
  Speaker 3: would have been here.
• 56:20
  Speaker 5: She was supposed to be getting a constant reminder.
• 56:22
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 56:22
  Speaker 5: This is my wife.
• 56:23
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 56:24
  Speaker 4: Like if she was here, you wouldn't be.
• 56:25
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 56:26
  Speaker 4: And that's what that feels like.
• 56:27
  Speaker 2: If you were here, you wouldn't be here. Kind of thing.
• 56:29
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 56:29
  Speaker 2: Just said it's like the ghost of her.
• 56:32
  Speaker 5: Yeah. There's a really hot in this conversation. Yeah. Everywhere. Folks.
• 56:39
  Speaker 3: He also thinks it would be a sweet surprise for
• 56:41
  Speaker 3: Mandy's parents, who are invited since he is still really
• 56:44
  Speaker 3: close to them. I did lose by cool, I will admit.
• 56:47
  Speaker 3: I told him honestly how I felt about the Mandy situation,
• 56:50
  Speaker 3: taking over our wedding, and how I'm uncomfortable with it.
• 56:53
  Speaker 3: I also asked him if he could ask his family
• 56:55
  Speaker 3: to limit the Mandy comments at our wedding, since now
• 56:58
  Speaker 3: I'm afraid the whole wedding will be focused on her. Yeah,
• 57:02
  Speaker 3: I think those are fair. What do you think, though?
• 57:04
  Speaker 5: I mean, I was just going to say, I feel
• 57:06
  Speaker 5: like we need a, we need a, Put some incense.
• 57:10
  Speaker 3: Lights of incense.
• 57:12
  Speaker 5: Sage it.
• 57:13
  Speaker 2: Sage the wedding. Sage the wedding.
• 57:16
  Speaker 5: Sage the wedding.
• 57:17
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 57:18
  Speaker 5: Dude, are you guys superstitious at all? No. Yes.
• 57:22
  Speaker 3: Kiana is very superstitious, and I'm not at all.
• 57:24
  Speaker 5: Yeah, of course. Of course. We get it. We get it.
• 57:27
  Speaker 5: That's some people of color thing. You know what I mean?
• 57:32
  Speaker 5: That's some bruja stuff going on right now. Yes. Yes. No,
• 57:35
  Speaker 5: I just, you can't, you can't, I don't know, man,
• 57:38
  Speaker 5: you can't, just let him grieve how he wants to grieve.
• 57:41
  Speaker 3: So you think that he should be able to have
• 57:43
  Speaker 3: this thing at the wedding?
• 57:44
  Speaker 5: No. I thought other people were trying to get him.
• 57:49
  Speaker 3: So basically, right now, what we know is that his
• 57:52
  Speaker 3: family and also him are asking OP, hey, can we
• 57:57
  Speaker 3: do this thing? Can we have this at our wedding?
• 57:58
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 57:59
  Speaker 3: You know, can we have a slideshow with Mandy there?
• 58:01
  Speaker 5: Oh. Yeah.
• 58:02
  Speaker 4: So he's also asking.
• 58:04
  Speaker 3: Which is why OP's like.
• 58:06
  Speaker 5: okay nah you can't be doing that yeah that's a
• 58:08
  Speaker 5: little weird oh man oh I thought this was the
• 58:11
  Speaker 5: guy that I thought Opie was the Opie's the girl
• 58:13
  Speaker 5: okay yeah I thought Opie was the.
• 58:14
  Speaker 2: Husband he's gonna get married to yeah oh.
• 58:17
  Speaker 3: My god yeah I think it's I think it's I
• 58:20
  Speaker 3: think a lot of people are saying in the comments
• 58:22
  Speaker 3: he doesn't seem ready.
• 58:23
  Speaker 2: He's not ready no he's still holding on to that
• 58:26
  Speaker 2: notion it was like If Mandy were here, I'd marry her. Or, like,
• 58:29
  Speaker 2: you're just a placeholder for her.
• 58:30
  Speaker 3: Like, this would have been her dream wedding.
• 58:32
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 58:32
  Speaker 5: Oh, my gosh. Yeah.
• 58:34
  Speaker 2: Roxy says it's turning into a memorial celebration for the ex.
• 58:37
  Speaker 4: Which they could have.
• 58:39
  Speaker 2: They totally could have. Just don't do it at our wedding.
• 58:42
  Speaker 3: I told them that I need time away to think,
• 58:44
  Speaker 3: and I've been staying at my parents' house, but we've
• 58:46
  Speaker 3: still been talking. Am I the a-hole? Am I overreacting?
• 58:49
  Speaker 3: We do have an update, but I feel.
• 58:51
  Speaker 5: Like we've... Yeah, we went through it.
• 58:54
  Speaker 2: We've said.
• 58:54
  Speaker 4: We've said.
• 58:55
  Speaker 3: Not the a-hole.
• 58:55
  Speaker 2: You're not the a-hole.
• 58:56
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 58:57
  Speaker 3: Thank you to everyone for the kind words. I'll try
• 59:00
  Speaker 3: to put a condensed version here. The wedding is postponed indefinitely.
• 59:05
  Speaker 6: Dang.
• 59:05
  Speaker 3: But we're still together and working through things. He was
• 59:08
  Speaker 3: defensive about the situation at first. first, but eventually came around.
• 59:12
  Speaker 3: We both agree that couples therapy is needed and are
• 59:14
  Speaker 3: in the process of starting that. Any any final thoughts?
• 59:18
  Speaker 3: Now we know that they're no longer getting married. I
• 59:21
  Speaker 3: think that's the right decision.
• 59:23
  Speaker 5: I mean, yeah, I think so.
• 59:25
  Speaker 3: I think he wasn't ready.
• 59:26
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 59:27
  Speaker 5: He's definitely not ready to move on, you know? And like,
• 59:30
  Speaker 5: if it comes to a point where you're just like,
• 59:32
  Speaker 5: all right, I'll, I'm bringing like this, like, it's like statue.
• 59:36
  Speaker 4: Yes.
• 59:37
  Speaker 3: I'm carrying this statue around of your wife.
• 59:39
  Speaker 5: Yeah. You know, I'm just like, that wouldn't make me
• 59:41
  Speaker 5: feel pretty comfortable.
• 59:42
  Speaker 2: No.
• 59:43
  Speaker 3: Did you ever have to read Rebecca in school?
• 59:46
  Speaker 5: No, I don't think so.
• 59:47
  Speaker 3: Basically, I think it's Rebecca. There's also another story about this,
• 59:50
  Speaker 3: but like the wife is in the attic, like the
• 59:53
  Speaker 3: ex-wife is in the attic. It's just like she's haunting
• 59:55
  Speaker 3: the narrative, you know?
• 59:56
  Speaker 5: Yeah, that's pretty crazy. I got to check that out.
• 59:57
  Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 59:58
  Speaker 3: I actually didn't like Rebecca when I read it, but
• 1:00:00
  Speaker 3: maybe I would today. I was like 14.
• 1:00:03
  Speaker 5: Hmm.
• 1:00:05
  Speaker 3: As for his family, they are deeply sorry, especially, mostly,
• 1:00:08
  Speaker 3: his mom. When I went to talk to her about it,
• 1:00:10
  Speaker 3: she was really in tears. Mandy was like a daughter
• 1:00:12
  Speaker 3: to her, so she said, and she just hasn't gotten
• 1:00:15
  Speaker 3: over losing her yet. I talked to her about therapy.
• 1:00:18
  Speaker 3: She told me she didn't go after Mandy passed, and
• 1:00:20
  Speaker 3: she agrees it's something to look into, though not sure
• 1:00:23
  Speaker 3: if anything concrete has.
• 1:00:24
  Speaker 2: Come of it.
• 1:00:25
  Speaker 3: I can't say that I feel 100% better about the situation.
• 1:00:28
  Speaker 3: And I think that my relationship with his mom now
• 1:00:30
  Speaker 3: has a bit of a strain on it, even if
• 1:00:33
  Speaker 3: she did apologize. But I'm hoping to work through these
• 1:00:35
  Speaker 3: things in therapy. And if I can't, or my fiance can't,
• 1:00:40
  Speaker 3: then I'll have to do what's best for me and
• 1:00:42
  Speaker 3: end the relationship. And that's the end of the story.
• 1:00:46
  Speaker 2: That's tough.
• 1:00:47
  Speaker 5: Yeah, that's tough. It's always hard to lose somebody you love. Anyone, yeah,
• 1:00:51
  Speaker 5: of course.
• 1:00:52
  Speaker 3: And, you know, I think we've read stories where we
• 1:00:55
  Speaker 3: have the crazy new wife or new girlfriend who's like,
• 1:00:59
  Speaker 3: I don't even want you to mention your deceased partner
• 1:01:03
  Speaker 3: or whatever. But that's not what OP is doing at all.
• 1:01:06
  Speaker 3: She's just like, I don't want her to be, I
• 1:01:08
  Speaker 3: don't want you to be marrying her up there, you know?
• 1:01:10
  Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah. But also, too, like, I think, like, Cause I,
• 1:01:14
  Speaker 5: like how we said before, like everybody grieves differently, you
• 1:01:17
  Speaker 5: know what I mean? So like, I feel like hopefully
• 1:01:21
  Speaker 5: like this, like this dude can get the help that
• 1:01:23
  Speaker 5: he can get, you know, to like help move on
• 1:01:25
  Speaker 5: from this stuff, you know?
• 1:01:27
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:01:27
  Speaker 5: Um, I'm a big, I'm a big believer in time
• 1:01:30
  Speaker 5: heals all wounds, you know?
• 1:01:32
  Speaker 3: And so I also think it probably he thought that
• 1:01:36
  Speaker 3: he was over it or as over it as you
• 1:01:38
  Speaker 3: can be like moved on from it.
• 1:01:40
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 1:01:40
  Speaker 3: And then the wedding just kind of triggered everything.
• 1:01:44
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 1:01:45
  Speaker 2: They were engaged for a month. Yeah.
• 1:01:48
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 1:01:48
  Speaker 1: And that's the end of this story. Let's head to
• 1:01:51
  Speaker 1: the next one.
• 1:01:52
  Speaker 5: My boyfriend's mother expected to move with us. She wasn't
• 1:01:56
  Speaker 5: even asking.
• 1:01:57
  Speaker 3: Well, I'm going to tell you no anyway.
• 1:02:01
  Speaker 5: Long story short, my boyfriend's mom is poor and had
• 1:02:04
  Speaker 5: to move into my boyfriend and I's apartment last month
• 1:02:07
  Speaker 5: because my boyfriend's brother, who lived with her, got them
• 1:02:10
  Speaker 5: both evicted.
• 1:02:11
  Speaker 3: Well, yeah, that one's not good.
• 1:02:14
  Speaker 5: That'll do it. That'll be a reason. He stole her
• 1:02:17
  Speaker 5: car and wrecked it into their apartment and almost unalive someone.
• 1:02:21
  Speaker 3: Oh, yikes.
• 1:02:22
  Speaker 5: He's currently in rehab and before she moved in, I
• 1:02:26
  Speaker 5: sat down with my boyfriend and laid out the requirements
• 1:02:29
  Speaker 5: of her living here. She must cut off contact with
• 1:02:31
  Speaker 5: his brother for his own good and never invite him over.
• 1:02:35
  Speaker 5: as I'm afraid of him retaliating at our apartment and
• 1:02:38
  Speaker 5: getting us evicted too. And she should stop enabling him
• 1:02:41
  Speaker 5: with a constant safety net to continue his substance use.
• 1:02:45
  Speaker 5: I know it sounds harsh, but it was the only
• 1:02:47
  Speaker 5: way to actually force him to get help. This has
• 1:02:49
  Speaker 5: been an almost decade-long battle of her enabling him, and
• 1:02:53
  Speaker 5: he's not getting any better. My boyfriend agreed to this,
• 1:02:55
  Speaker 5: and she agreed. Cut to two weeks in, I come
• 1:02:58
  Speaker 5: home from work, and my boyfriend and her are laughing
• 1:03:00
  Speaker 5: about how they took his brother to Golden Corral. Sick.
• 1:03:04
  Speaker 5: when i was gone and he was so high he
• 1:03:06
  Speaker 5: was nodding off in the food been there done that
• 1:03:09
  Speaker 5: i was so upset that not only did she break
• 1:03:12
  Speaker 5: the cardinal rule the cardinal rule at golden corral.
• 1:03:15
  Speaker 3: You didn't you broke the cardinal rule you got salad
• 1:03:17
  Speaker 3: there's one.
• 1:03:18
  Speaker 5: Rule we saved the chocolate fountain for after uh she
• 1:03:23
  Speaker 5: broke the cardinal rule that i set for her but
• 1:03:24
  Speaker 5: that my boyfriend went along with it and did it
• 1:03:27
  Speaker 5: too wow I told him I felt betrayed and he
• 1:03:29
  Speaker 5: just set a precedent to her that she can do
• 1:03:31
  Speaker 5: whatever she wants now because any rule set isn't actually
• 1:03:34
  Speaker 5: going to be enforced clearly by his example. By the way,
• 1:03:38
  Speaker 5: this comes from u slash plentyu3938. And if you want
• 1:03:41
  Speaker 5: to submit your own stories, go to r slash okstorytime subreddit.
• 1:03:46
  Speaker 5: My name's Mike.
• 1:03:47
  Speaker 3: I'm Sophia.
• 1:03:48
  Speaker 2: I'm Keon.
• 1:03:49
  Speaker 5: And today we're going to give good advice goofily, but
• 1:03:50
  Speaker 5: we don't know all the answers. If you guys have
• 1:03:53
  Speaker 5: anything that you guys have advice, sound off in the
• 1:03:55
  Speaker 5: comments below. But as OP says, he told me he
• 1:04:00
  Speaker 5: did it because he thought it was too harsh after
• 1:04:02
  Speaker 5: the fact without telling me that he had changed his mind.
• 1:04:04
  Speaker 5: and thereby going against our agreement. I otherwise wouldn't have
• 1:04:08
  Speaker 5: let her live here rent-free. My boyfriend said putting her
• 1:04:12
  Speaker 5: on the street was too harsh of a punishment for
• 1:04:14
  Speaker 5: breaking the rules. But isn't that the point?
• 1:04:16
  Speaker 3: Yeah, that's what the rules are there for. If you
• 1:04:18
  Speaker 3: break them, there's a consequence.
• 1:04:20
  Speaker 5: Yeah. Not to this guy.
• 1:04:22
  Speaker 3: So no, but I don't want to give consequences.
• 1:04:25
  Speaker 5: I just want to do magic.
• 1:04:27
  Speaker 3: I just thought if she broke the rules, then we
• 1:04:29
  Speaker 3: would just say, hey, stop breaking the rules.
• 1:04:33
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 1:04:33
  Speaker 5: Also, too, like... Does injecting, injecting a needle should slap
• 1:04:39
  Speaker 5: on the wrist? You need help, brother. It's time to
• 1:04:42
  Speaker 5: be real.
• 1:04:43
  Speaker 2: If this is being harsh, let's be really harsh then. Like,
• 1:04:45
  Speaker 2: this is crazy.
• 1:04:47
  Speaker 5: Yeah, man. So now she's telling us we need to
• 1:04:51
  Speaker 5: do her chores when we pay the rent because she
• 1:04:53
  Speaker 5: doesn't want to do them, knowing he won't enforce or
• 1:04:57
  Speaker 5: punt her out because he ultimately can't face the guilt
• 1:05:00
  Speaker 5: of doing so. He has attachment issues with her and
• 1:05:03
  Speaker 5: a heavy guilt complex. Our apartment lease is up in
• 1:05:06
  Speaker 5: a couple of months. And now that we're moving, she
• 1:05:08
  Speaker 5: asked us, so where are we going to?
• 1:05:11
  Speaker 3: Well, we are going somewhere and you are going another place.
• 1:05:16
  Speaker 5: Yeah. So she's fully expecting a free ride and free
• 1:05:20
  Speaker 5: rent at our next place. I was so dumbfounded because
• 1:05:23
  Speaker 5: she was only supposed to be here until she got housing.
• 1:05:26
  Speaker 5: But low income housing waiting lists can be months to
• 1:05:28
  Speaker 5: years long. I don't want to live with her anymore
• 1:05:31
  Speaker 5: because she walks all over us and causes tension between
• 1:05:34
  Speaker 5: my boyfriend and I. He will never put her on
• 1:05:36
  Speaker 5: the street because he's controlled by his guilt. When I
• 1:05:39
  Speaker 5: asked what he plans to do, he said he isn't
• 1:05:41
  Speaker 5: taking her to our next place, but that would ultimately
• 1:05:45
  Speaker 5: leave her on the street. And I know deep down,
• 1:05:47
  Speaker 5: even if we initially move without her, she will be
• 1:05:50
  Speaker 5: back in a week or two because he'll feel guilty.
• 1:05:53
  Speaker 5: I want to move into a studio apartment now, knowing
• 1:05:56
  Speaker 5: that I don't believe he's going to let her go. Yeah.
• 1:05:59
  Speaker 5: And I voice this as a real possibility to him,
• 1:06:01
  Speaker 5: but I'm being framed as trying to dismantle our relationship.
• 1:06:06
  Speaker 5: Am I the a-hole?
• 1:06:07
  Speaker 3: That was going to be my advice. Like, OP should
• 1:06:10
  Speaker 3: just move out. You don't necessarily have to break up
• 1:06:12
  Speaker 3: with him, but you should move out.
• 1:06:14
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 1:06:15
  Speaker 2: Have him deal with it.
• 1:06:15
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 1:06:16
  Speaker 3: It's his mom.
• 1:06:17
  Speaker 5: Yeah. You can't just give that into the relationship, too.
• 1:06:21
  Speaker 5: You're like, hey, by the way, here's our third roommate. Oh, yeah.
• 1:06:24
  Speaker 5: But he gets high every single day.
• 1:06:26
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 1:06:27
  Speaker 5: Well, yeah. Just watch out for your copper, I guess.
• 1:06:31
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:06:31
  Speaker 3: And I think the mom is also just also kind
• 1:06:34
  Speaker 3: of annoying.
• 1:06:35
  Speaker 5: Yeah. Oh, the one with the drug habit?
• 1:06:37
  Speaker 4: No, the mom.
• 1:06:38
  Speaker 5: Oh, yeah, the mom.
• 1:06:39
  Speaker 3: Yeah, the mom is annoying. She keeps expecting them to, like,
• 1:06:43
  Speaker 3: wait on her hand and foot.
• 1:06:44
  Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 1:06:45
  Speaker 3: And she's like, okay, I'm coming.
• 1:06:46
  Speaker 4: With you guys.
• 1:06:48
  Speaker 5: Yeah. So where are we moving at?
• 1:06:50
  Speaker 2: Tower Adventure.
• 1:06:51
  Speaker 5: Who is we?
• 1:06:52
  Speaker 4: OP.
• 1:06:53
  Speaker 3: OP says, you just have to look at your boyfriend
• 1:06:55
  Speaker 3: and be like, your mom's going with you, and I'm
• 1:06:56
  Speaker 3: going my own way, and that's okay.
• 1:06:58
  Speaker 5: Yeah. King Kong, yeah.
• 1:07:00
  Speaker 2: I literally just say, start playing Fleetwood. Yeah.
• 1:07:03
  Speaker 5: Fleetwood.
• 1:07:04
  Speaker 3: Everything's fine.
• 1:07:05
  Speaker 5: Shout out. So we got an update here, folks. So
• 1:07:09
  Speaker 5: it's been a few months and I still can't believe
• 1:07:12
  Speaker 5: what an overwhelming response this post got. Needless to say,
• 1:07:15
  Speaker 5: you guys completely changed my life. So thank you. I
• 1:07:19
  Speaker 5: went ahead and got my own place when our lease ended.
• 1:07:22
  Speaker 5: He got his own place about half an hour away
• 1:07:24
  Speaker 5: and his mom managed to get accepted at an apartment
• 1:07:27
  Speaker 5: of her own.
• 1:07:28
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I think it's a little concerning that you expressed, hey, like,
• 1:07:33
  Speaker 3: I have a solution. I move out. You move in
• 1:07:35
  Speaker 3: with your mom.
• 1:07:36
  Speaker 4: And he was like, what?
• 1:07:37
  Speaker 2: You're destroying our relationship.
• 1:07:39
  Speaker 5: You're tearing us apart.
• 1:07:41
  Speaker 3: She's like, no, I was trying not to tear us
• 1:07:43
  Speaker 3: apart because this would tear us apart for sure.
• 1:07:46
  Speaker 5: Yeah. But also, too, you clocked it early, too, where
• 1:07:49
  Speaker 5: you're just like, yeah, they just got to move out.
• 1:07:51
  Speaker 3: They just have to move out.
• 1:07:53
  Speaker 5: That's not bad. It's not a bad thing to live apart. Honestly,
• 1:07:56
  Speaker 5: it's probably better for them.
• 1:07:57
  Speaker 3: Yeah, especially for them right now. Until you can figure
• 1:08:01
  Speaker 3: out your mom's housing situation. We just can't live together.
• 1:08:04
  Speaker 5: That's fine. Totally fine, dude. Yeah, so we got an
• 1:08:09
  Speaker 5: update here.
• 1:08:10
  Speaker 6: Sure do.
• 1:08:12
  Speaker 5: I do genuinely hope her the best regardless of what
• 1:08:15
  Speaker 5: had happened, but I don't keep in touch with her
• 1:08:17
  Speaker 5: at all anymore. My boyfriend and I decided that we
• 1:08:19
  Speaker 5: should take some time apart and see other people.
• 1:08:22
  Speaker 2: Wow.
• 1:08:23
  Speaker 5: But we still keep in touch and he's always going
• 1:08:25
  Speaker 5: to be someone that's important to me. I just think
• 1:08:27
  Speaker 5: the limit of our relationship all along was friendship and
• 1:08:30
  Speaker 5: not romantic and that's okay. His brother has since been
• 1:08:34
  Speaker 5: charged with some stuff and is in prison so that
• 1:08:36
  Speaker 5: whole dynamic has changed as well.
• 1:08:38
  Speaker 2: There's the harsh reality. Yikes.
• 1:08:41
  Speaker 5: Yep, yep. There it is. Having him out of the
• 1:08:44
  Speaker 5: picture has been very emotional for everyone. And again, I
• 1:08:47
  Speaker 5: hope being in prison gets him the help he needs
• 1:08:50
  Speaker 5: and he stays sober. He's not a bad person, just
• 1:08:52
  Speaker 5: very misguided. Lastly, I've been exploring this new city on
• 1:08:56
  Speaker 5: my own and trying my best to make new connections
• 1:08:59
  Speaker 5: slash decisions. things about myself. And this is my first
• 1:09:02
  Speaker 5: time really socializing on my own since the pandemic, so
• 1:09:05
  Speaker 5: it's very liberating. I might have met someone special too. Wait, what?
• 1:09:08
  Speaker 2: Wow.
• 1:09:10
  Speaker 5: But we're taking our time because I don't want to
• 1:09:12
  Speaker 5: rush things. But none of this would have been possible
• 1:09:14
  Speaker 5: without such unanimous support. So thank you guys so much.
• 1:09:17
  Speaker 5: I truly mean it. Yeah. So listen, dude, I mean,
• 1:09:22
  Speaker 5: you sure moved on fast. So maybe you guys weren't
• 1:09:28
  Speaker 5: really romantic, you know. Also, too, just like. You know,
• 1:09:34
  Speaker 5: if you're I mean, I would agree with your position, too.
• 1:09:38
  Speaker 5: You're this is somebody you're dating. You're already like having
• 1:09:40
  Speaker 5: like two family problems. Like you're not marrying the guy.
• 1:09:43
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 1:09:44
  Speaker 3: It's too early to be dealing with all this.
• 1:09:47
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 1:09:47
  Speaker 3: But good luck.
• 1:09:49
  Speaker 5: Good luck with your life. Do you.
• 1:09:52
  Speaker 1: And that's the end of this story. Let's head to
• 1:09:54
  Speaker 1: the next one.
• 1:09:55
  Speaker 5: My family is disrespected. My girlfriend for years. And I
• 1:10:00
  Speaker 5: never once defended her.
• 1:10:01
  Speaker 4: What the heck, dude?
• 1:10:03
  Speaker 5: So my girlfriend, 28 female and I, 27 male, have
• 1:10:06
  Speaker 5: been together for a while and love each other very much.
• 1:10:09
  Speaker 5: We live together and we've been talking about marriage recently.
• 1:10:13
  Speaker 5: Good for you. My birthday is next week.
• 1:10:16
  Speaker 3: Happy birthday.
• 1:10:17
  Speaker 5: Happy birthday. And crap is about to hit the fan.
• 1:10:20
  Speaker 5: I really need advice. One thing you need to know
• 1:10:23
  Speaker 5: about my girlfriend is that she loves throwing parties and
• 1:10:26
  Speaker 5: giving gifts every year. She plans me the most amazing
• 1:10:29
  Speaker 5: party and goes all out to fulfill my every wish. Okay,
• 1:10:33
  Speaker 5: got to keep her.
• 1:10:34
  Speaker 3: That's very nice.
• 1:10:35
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 1:10:35
  Speaker 4: That sounds great.
• 1:10:36
  Speaker 5: Yeah, sounds great. She always pays for everything and tries
• 1:10:39
  Speaker 5: her hardest to make sure everyone has fun. This year,
• 1:10:42
  Speaker 5: she planned me a huge birthday bash and consulted my
• 1:10:45
  Speaker 5: family about it two months in advance to let them
• 1:10:48
  Speaker 5: know what was going on. They all were happy with
• 1:10:50
  Speaker 5: the idea and said yes. She asked me to confirm
• 1:10:53
  Speaker 5: with my brother this week how many people were coming
• 1:10:55
  Speaker 5: and And what time? And that's when everything went to crap. Oh, no.
• 1:11:00
  Speaker 5: He tells me that him and my whole family don't
• 1:11:02
  Speaker 5: want to go to this party because it will be inconvenient.
• 1:11:06
  Speaker 5: And maybe we should throw a similar party in April.
• 1:11:08
  Speaker 3: I'm sorry. I'm going to pause you right there.
• 1:11:12
  Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, go for it.
• 1:11:12
  Speaker 3: We're going to change my birthday party to another week?
• 1:11:18
  Speaker 4: It's my birthday.
• 1:11:19
  Speaker 2: Maybe even another month.
• 1:11:21
  Speaker 3: Yeah, another month, seemingly. I just have to say, usually
• 1:11:26
  Speaker 3: birthdays are kind of dependent on the date.
• 1:11:28
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:11:29
  Speaker 3: Of your birth.
• 1:11:29
  Speaker 5: Well, I think that's how, that's how birthdays work, right?
• 1:11:31
  Speaker 3: Typically, typically. But maybe they just aren't, you know, they
• 1:11:34
  Speaker 3: don't like to do things normally.
• 1:11:36
  Speaker 5: Oh yeah. It might be, it might be an untraditional thing. Yeah.
• 1:11:38
  Speaker 3: They're like, no, no, no. We like to do your
• 1:11:40
  Speaker 3: birthday three months away from your actual birth.
• 1:11:42
  Speaker 5: Yeah. Yeah.
• 1:11:44
  Speaker 3: It's just more interesting.
• 1:11:45
  Speaker 5: Oh, well. So, well, to keep it going, they want
• 1:11:48
  Speaker 5: to do something else.
• 1:11:49
  Speaker 4: Okay, okay.
• 1:11:50
  Speaker 5: And they want my girlfriend to plan it because she
• 1:11:53
  Speaker 5: planned last year's birthday party. Well, I told my girlfriend
• 1:11:56
  Speaker 5: and she flipped out.
• 1:11:58
  Speaker 2: She did a flip? That's so cool.
• 1:12:00
  Speaker 3: She freaking flipped out the door.
• 1:12:02
  Speaker 5: It's pretty sick. He did this. He was like, dude,
• 1:12:04
  Speaker 5: nice steez, bro. Yeah.
• 1:12:05
  Speaker 2: He's like, my girlfriend's so cool.
• 1:12:08
  Speaker 5: She got so angry, told me that she was going
• 1:12:12
  Speaker 5: to lose her deposit. told me that she hated my family,
• 1:12:15
  Speaker 5: that she was not going to change the party. By
• 1:12:18
  Speaker 5: the way, this comes from you slash girlfriend is pissed.
• 1:12:21
  Speaker 5: And if you want to submit your own stories, go
• 1:12:23
  Speaker 5: to r slash OK Storytime subreddit. My name's Mike.
• 1:12:26
  Speaker 3: I'm Sophia.
• 1:12:27
  Speaker 2: I'm Keon.
• 1:12:28
  Speaker 5: And today we're here to give good advice, goofily, but
• 1:12:31
  Speaker 5: we don't always have the answers. If you guys know
• 1:12:33
  Speaker 5: anything that you want to chip in, write it down
• 1:12:36
  Speaker 5: in the comments below.
• 1:12:37
  Speaker 3: Please.
• 1:12:38
  Speaker 5: But as OP says, to be fair, my family has
• 1:12:42
  Speaker 5: been real crappy to her. They have never gone to
• 1:12:45
  Speaker 5: anything she has invited them to, her graduation, her birthday party,
• 1:12:49
  Speaker 5: or housewarming party. Man, a lot of parties.
• 1:12:52
  Speaker 3: She's a party girl.
• 1:12:53
  Speaker 5: Party girl.
• 1:12:53
  Speaker 3: She loves throwing parties.
• 1:12:54
  Speaker 5: Me too. Yeah, right?
• 1:12:55
  Speaker 4: Been there.
• 1:12:56
  Speaker 5: Not too bad. Been there. Done that. They are extremely
• 1:12:59
  Speaker 5: passive aggressive towards her. They ignore her sometimes. They also
• 1:13:04
  Speaker 5: treat me like garbage too. Like I am the black
• 1:13:06
  Speaker 5: sheep of the family.
• 1:13:08
  Speaker 3: For real, your family sounds like they suck.
• 1:13:11
  Speaker 5: Get a new family, dude.
• 1:13:13
  Speaker 3: I understand why your girlfriend hates them.
• 1:13:16
  Speaker 5: I would hate them too.
• 1:13:17
  Speaker 3: Yeah, me too.
• 1:13:18
  Speaker 5: So my mother abandoned me for years with my father
• 1:13:21
  Speaker 5: and then tried to reconcile with me in my early
• 1:13:24
  Speaker 5: 20s to make up for the 17 plus years of neglect.
• 1:13:27
  Speaker 4: Oh.
• 1:13:28
  Speaker 5: My brother has six kids and is on welfare. I
• 1:13:31
  Speaker 5: can see why she wouldn't like them very much.
• 1:13:34
  Speaker 6: All right.
• 1:13:35
  Speaker 5: That feels like a personal attack on me. I told
• 1:13:38
  Speaker 5: her that I just want to make everyone happy and
• 1:13:40
  Speaker 5: wasn't sure what the plan was for the party.
• 1:13:43
  Speaker 4: What do you mean you're not sure?
• 1:13:44
  Speaker 3: She planned it.
• 1:13:46
  Speaker 5: Well, apparently this was the wrong thing to say. So
• 1:13:50
  Speaker 5: girlfriend blew up and started telling me that she was
• 1:13:53
  Speaker 5: tired of my family. She couldn't take it anymore. She
• 1:13:56
  Speaker 5: did not want to deal with this for the rest
• 1:13:58
  Speaker 5: of her life. That I have too many issues in
• 1:14:00
  Speaker 5: my life and they were bringing her down. She told
• 1:14:03
  Speaker 5: me not to come home and stay somewhere else so
• 1:14:05
  Speaker 5: that she could think. She inherited this house from her
• 1:14:08
  Speaker 5: deceased grandma, so it's hers. I'm devastated, but I honestly
• 1:14:11
  Speaker 5: don't think that's a big deal to break up over.
• 1:14:14
  Speaker 5: What caused this huge fight? It became something that could
• 1:14:17
  Speaker 5: make or break us. Why?
• 1:14:19
  Speaker 3: OP has not been like, clocked in to his relationship
• 1:14:25
  Speaker 3: this whole time.
• 1:14:26
  Speaker 5: This is just like something new that he's realizing about her.
• 1:14:29
  Speaker 3: He's like, well, yeah, they've been ignoring her and passive
• 1:14:32
  Speaker 3: aggressive and they've never gone to anything she's ever posted.
• 1:14:36
  Speaker 5: So she likes parties and my family is just... They
• 1:14:41
  Speaker 5: can't stand her parties. What's going on?
• 1:14:44
  Speaker 3: Even they actively make it harder for her to throw things.
• 1:14:47
  Speaker 2: I don't think they can stand her in general.
• 1:14:49
  Speaker 3: But where did this come from?
• 1:14:51
  Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah. What happened?
• 1:14:52
  Speaker 2: I think they like her still.
• 1:14:56
  Speaker 5: So, okay. So these are some relevant comments. So Love
• 1:14:59
  Speaker 5: Prada says, you're allowing your family to disrespect her. Why
• 1:15:04
  Speaker 5: should she be forced to move the party for them?
• 1:15:06
  Speaker 5: Put your foot down, tell them no, and tell them
• 1:15:09
  Speaker 5: to come to this party as there will not be another. Well,
• 1:15:12
  Speaker 5: OP says, OP replies, that's the thing. They don't want
• 1:15:15
  Speaker 5: to go to my party anymore. So that means my
• 1:15:18
  Speaker 5: entire family won't be there, which breaks my heart. I'm
• 1:15:22
  Speaker 5: stuck in a hard place because I love my family
• 1:15:24
  Speaker 5: and want them at my birthday party. But I love
• 1:15:26
  Speaker 5: my girlfriend and don't want her breaking up with me.
• 1:15:29
  Speaker 3: Well, she will break up with you if you don't.
• 1:15:34
  Speaker 3: And also you could totally just have another party.
• 1:15:37
  Speaker 5: Yeah. It's not that complicated.
• 1:15:39
  Speaker 3: Like you could have your birthday party on the weekend
• 1:15:41
  Speaker 3: of your birthday.
• 1:15:42
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 1:15:43
  Speaker 3: At your girlfriend's house. And then you can throw another party.
• 1:15:46
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 1:15:47
  Speaker 3: For your family.
• 1:15:48
  Speaker 5: Well, Love Prada says it's their fault, not hers. So
• 1:15:51
  Speaker 5: why should she be made to suffer? It's not fair
• 1:15:54
  Speaker 5: on her is my point. You've said they continuously treat
• 1:15:57
  Speaker 5: her badly. And I genuinely think they've done this on purpose.
• 1:16:00
  Speaker 5: They had two months notice and that two months to
• 1:16:02
  Speaker 5: tell her they'd not be coming. Tell them to treat
• 1:16:05
  Speaker 5: her with respect for Christ's sakes. She needs your support
• 1:16:08
  Speaker 5: in dealing with them. Not you trying to make everybody happy.
• 1:16:12
  Speaker 5: OP says, yeah, she said the same thing. Yeah, wow.
• 1:16:16
  Speaker 2: Shocking.
• 1:16:17
  Speaker 3: I love that OP's like, what's going on? Oh, yeah,
• 1:16:20
  Speaker 3: she said that.
• 1:16:20
  Speaker 5: This is the most clueless guy in America right now.
• 1:16:23
  Speaker 3: What's going on? She said that, too.
• 1:16:25
  Speaker 4: What does that mean?
• 1:16:26
  Speaker 5: It's like dropping hints, I guess. I don't know.
• 1:16:29
  Speaker 3: She's just speaking in riddles.
• 1:16:31
  Speaker 5: She's speaking in limericks. Yeah, what?
• 1:16:34
  Speaker 2: My family tells me only lies and my girlfriend only
• 1:16:36
  Speaker 2: tells me truths.
• 1:16:39
  Speaker 3: Who do I believe?
• 1:16:39
  Speaker 5: God, but I love my family so much. It's insane. Well,
• 1:16:45
  Speaker 5: Opie says, yeah, she said the same thing, that they
• 1:16:48
  Speaker 5: are doing this on purpose. I can understand how it
• 1:16:50
  Speaker 5: would look that way. Oh, brother, you're in too deep.
• 1:16:52
  Speaker 3: It doesn't just look that way.
• 1:16:53
  Speaker 5: You're in too deep, my guy.
• 1:16:55
  Speaker 4: It is that way.
• 1:16:56
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:16:57
  Speaker 5: But I can see my brother's point, too, because his
• 1:17:00
  Speaker 5: wife is pregnant and doesn't want to be sitting outside.
• 1:17:02
  Speaker 2: That's the only reason?
• 1:17:03
  Speaker 3: She just doesn't want to be sitting outside?
• 1:17:05
  Speaker 2: Then have her sit inside.
• 1:17:09
  Speaker 5: Simple as that. This is just a bad situation to
• 1:17:12
  Speaker 5: be in all around. No, it's not, dude.
• 1:17:14
  Speaker 3: It's bad on one side.
• 1:17:16
  Speaker 5: Yeah. It's bad on the side that you're choosing.
• 1:17:19
  Speaker 4: Yes.
• 1:17:19
  Speaker 5: That's why it feels like it's bad.
• 1:17:20
  Speaker 3: You chose the wrong side.
• 1:17:23
  Speaker 5: I feel like if I take my girlfriend's side, then
• 1:17:25
  Speaker 5: I'm going to look like a huge insensitive a-hole to
• 1:17:28
  Speaker 5: my family. But if I choose their side, then I'm
• 1:17:31
  Speaker 5: betraying my girlfriend. I will. Yeah. Yes. It doesn't seem
• 1:17:35
  Speaker 5: like that, dog. You are, bro.
• 1:17:37
  Speaker 2: If I don't choose my family's side when they make me.
• 1:17:40
  Speaker 5: Want to change my own birthday. Bro, it's like, what
• 1:17:44
  Speaker 5: are we talking about, dude?
• 1:17:45
  Speaker 3: What are we talking about?
• 1:17:47
  Speaker 5: Um, I will admit I got kind of dramatic and
• 1:17:50
  Speaker 5: told her F this, just cancel the effing party, which
• 1:17:54
  Speaker 5: probably put the nail in the coffin.
• 1:17:55
  Speaker 2: You're so stupid.
• 1:17:57
  Speaker 5: That's insane.
• 1:17:59
  Speaker 3: The party that she said that she couldn't get her
• 1:18:01
  Speaker 3: deposits back on.
• 1:18:04
  Speaker 5: And also just like, yeah, three months from now too.
• 1:18:06
  Speaker 5: It's just like, what? Huh? So Red Panda Girl says, wow,
• 1:18:12
  Speaker 5: you're really going the idiot route.
• 1:18:14
  Speaker 2: He's going on like hard mode, like extremely hard mode.
• 1:18:18
  Speaker 3: Speed mode. Speed run that.
• 1:18:20
  Speaker 2: He's like, you want to see someone skate uphill?
• 1:18:22
  Speaker 5: Yeah. And also, if you're going to marry this girl,
• 1:18:26
  Speaker 5: which I doubt will happen, she has to be the
• 1:18:29
  Speaker 5: most important person in your life, even above your family.
• 1:18:32
  Speaker 5: I'm not saying this is like, what? What are you
• 1:18:34
  Speaker 5: talking about?
• 1:18:35
  Speaker 3: What do you mean? My mom who abandoned me for
• 1:18:39
  Speaker 3: 17 years is not better than my girlfriend?
• 1:18:42
  Speaker 5: I'm not saying that this is the case. F this,
• 1:18:44
  Speaker 5: just cancel the effing party. Yeah, I would have canceled
• 1:18:47
  Speaker 5: it too if I were her. You sounded ungrateful and ungrateful.
• 1:18:50
  Speaker 5: your family's side. I'd also served you your walking papers
• 1:18:53
  Speaker 5: at the moment. OP says, ouch, did I really mess
• 1:18:57
  Speaker 5: up that badly?
• 1:18:58
  Speaker 3: You're right around the corner from the point.
• 1:19:02
  Speaker 2: It's not clocking, is it?
• 1:19:03
  Speaker 3: It's not clocking.
• 1:19:05
  Speaker 2: You're a father.
• 1:19:06
  Speaker 5: There's two people in this guy's brain right now. It's
• 1:19:09
  Speaker 5: dumb and dumber, bro. What is happening, dude?
• 1:19:13
  Speaker 3: I need Justin Bieber to talk some sense into this man.
• 1:19:16
  Speaker 5: Yeah, this guy is Albert and Einstein, bro. You know
• 1:19:19
  Speaker 5: what I'm saying? It's crazy. Red Panda Girl responds to him, absolutely,
• 1:19:25
  Speaker 5: if I were her, you'd be moving out right now
• 1:19:27
  Speaker 5: instead of posting about it on Reddit.
• 1:19:29
  Speaker 3: Yeah, you wouldn't even have a computer to post on it.
• 1:19:30
  Speaker 4: So true, by the way.
• 1:19:31
  Speaker 5: So true, by the way. Thanks to you slash neatad4331
• 1:19:37
  Speaker 5: for this comment, Chain. OP continues, well, the party is
• 1:19:41
  Speaker 5: an outside event, and all of a sudden they don't
• 1:19:43
  Speaker 5: want to be outside, and I wonder why. They want
• 1:19:46
  Speaker 5: to party at a place that charges $ 80 per person
• 1:19:49
  Speaker 5: to be able to participate in the event. which is
• 1:19:51
  Speaker 5: another reason my girlfriend is furious. Seth Noir says, so
• 1:19:57
  Speaker 5: she tends to pay for every part she plans. They
• 1:19:59
  Speaker 5: suddenly want to go to a place. Dude, they are
• 1:20:01
  Speaker 5: ripping on this guy right now. I like it. They
• 1:20:04
  Speaker 5: suddenly want to go to a place that costs $ 80
• 1:20:07
  Speaker 5: per person and want her to plan it. Are you
• 1:20:09
  Speaker 5: seeing the link here? OP says, gonna sound really stupid here,
• 1:20:13
  Speaker 5: but no.
• 1:20:14
  Speaker 3: I don't see the link.
• 1:20:16
  Speaker 5: Oh my gosh.
• 1:20:18
  Speaker 3: OP's like that meme of the person doing all the
• 1:20:20
  Speaker 3: math equations, but he's.
• 1:20:22
  Speaker 4: Like, but he doesn't understand.
• 1:20:24
  Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah. Dude.
• 1:20:26
  Speaker 3: It's just a bunch of question marks in his mind.
• 1:20:28
  Speaker 5: I mean, this guy, if reading, he's blind if he
• 1:20:33
  Speaker 5: has to read a room, bro.
• 1:20:34
  Speaker 2: He's blind, deaf.
• 1:20:36
  Speaker 5: This room needs to be in Braille for him to read, bro.
• 1:20:38
  Speaker 5: This is insane.
• 1:20:40
  Speaker 3: Just not seeing it.
• 1:20:41
  Speaker 4: Just not seeing it.
• 1:20:42
  Speaker 5: Okay. Well, gang, we got an update. So two days later.
• 1:20:46
  Speaker 5: So I, 27 male, did what all you basically screamed
• 1:20:50
  Speaker 5: at me. I hate this guy already. Screamed at me
• 1:20:53
  Speaker 5: to do, and I put my foot down with my family.
• 1:20:55
  Speaker 6: Oh, okay, cool.
• 1:20:56
  Speaker 3: Yeah, he went.
• 1:20:58
  Speaker 5: Hey. I called my brother, and I told him that
• 1:21:04
  Speaker 5: I wanted the birthday party my girlfriend, 28, a female,
• 1:21:07
  Speaker 5: planned me. I told him she put a lot of
• 1:21:09
  Speaker 5: effort into it and that they could go to that
• 1:21:11
  Speaker 5: one or not go at all. All he said was, K,
• 1:21:15
  Speaker 5: I begged for my girlfriend to talk to me. Then
• 1:21:18
  Speaker 5: I told her everything that I've been holding back about
• 1:21:21
  Speaker 5: my family. I told her about my insecurities and my
• 1:21:23
  Speaker 5: issues with neediness and approval seeking. I spilled my heart
• 1:21:27
  Speaker 5: out to her, something that I've never done with anyone.
• 1:21:30
  Speaker 5: I've never spoken with anyone about my family. And by
• 1:21:33
  Speaker 5: the time I was finished, I was a crying mess
• 1:21:35
  Speaker 5: on my knees. It was pathetic, but she comforted me
• 1:21:38
  Speaker 5: and cried with me. Okay. All right, Gaslighter.
• 1:21:41
  Speaker 4: Okay.
• 1:21:42
  Speaker 5: She said basically everything you guys told me, that I
• 1:21:45
  Speaker 5: didn't have her back, that she felt like I picked
• 1:21:47
  Speaker 5: them over her. It broke my heart to hear her cry.
• 1:21:50
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it took you this long for you to be like, oh,
• 1:21:53
  Speaker 2: I need to see her cry and hear her cry
• 1:21:54
  Speaker 2: to be like.
• 1:21:55
  Speaker 5: I'm just going to the face right now.
• 1:21:56
  Speaker 2: I see it. I see it now.
• 1:21:58
  Speaker 4: I see it.
• 1:21:59
  Speaker 5: Jeez.
• 1:22:00
  Speaker 3: She's upset.
• 1:22:03
  Speaker 5: So I set up a counseling appointment with my school
• 1:22:06
  Speaker 5: for next week and invited my girlfriend to come with
• 1:22:09
  Speaker 5: me so she could sit in and speak up if
• 1:22:11
  Speaker 5: she wants to. If you let her, dog. Yeah, we
• 1:22:15
  Speaker 5: kind of got this.
• 1:22:16
  Speaker 4: We got this.
• 1:22:18
  Speaker 3: I don't think they should get back together.
• 1:22:19
  Speaker 4: I think they are going to.
• 1:22:21
  Speaker 5: Oh, you think so?
• 1:22:22
  Speaker 2: I think after that.
• 1:22:23
  Speaker 3: That would piss me off so bad. But I think
• 1:22:25
  Speaker 3: he needs therapy.
• 1:22:26
  Speaker 5: Honestly, I could see. Yeah, of course.
• 1:22:27
  Speaker 3: I think he needs so much therapy. But I feel
• 1:22:29
  Speaker 3: like he's, I think she's going to be like, oh, well,
• 1:22:31
  Speaker 3: he feels so bad.
• 1:22:33
  Speaker 5: Oh, bro. Yeah.
• 1:22:34
  Speaker 3: So I have to get back together with him.
• 1:22:36
  Speaker 5: Well, you're going to, yeah, you're going to get trapped
• 1:22:38
  Speaker 5: right here. You can't get trapped like that.
• 1:22:39
  Speaker 4: He's tricking you.
• 1:22:40
  Speaker 5: I know. Listen, listen. I didn't do a big romantic
• 1:22:44
  Speaker 5: gesture like some of you suggested. Brother, go left. You're
• 1:22:49
  Speaker 5: thinking left. Just go right. Just do whatever you're thinking
• 1:22:52
  Speaker 5: that you're supposed to be doing. Do the opposite of that.
• 1:22:55
  Speaker 3: Don't trust any of your instincts.
• 1:22:57
  Speaker 5: Yeah. You have a gut feeling. You throw up. Okay.
• 1:23:02
  Speaker 5: So I bought her flowers and we met up in
• 1:23:04
  Speaker 5: a parking lot of a Starbucks. Classy. Or I spilled
• 1:23:07
  Speaker 5: my guts to her and cried into her lap while
• 1:23:09
  Speaker 5: we sat in her car.
• 1:23:11
  Speaker 2: I'm pissed. They say chivalry is gone.
• 1:23:13
  Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 1:23:15
  Speaker 3: I didn't do a romantic gesture. Instead, we met up
• 1:23:18
  Speaker 3: in a parking lot and I made her comfort me again.
• 1:23:20
  Speaker 2: And I cried in the parking lot.
• 1:23:23
  Speaker 5: I have problems. I know that. Wow. Captain Obvious. The
• 1:23:26
  Speaker 5: first thing you've known. Big telescope, man. Yeah.
• 1:23:29
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 1:23:30
  Speaker 5: My family is effed up. I just want slash wanted
• 1:23:33
  Speaker 5: them to love me and finally accept me. But I
• 1:23:36
  Speaker 5: see now that their love is toxic and meaningless. I
• 1:23:40
  Speaker 5: feel like he's gaslighting me now. Yeah. Thank you all
• 1:23:45
  Speaker 5: for your advice. My girlfriend and I are still together.
• 1:23:47
  Speaker 2: No.
• 1:23:48
  Speaker 5: And while she's still hurt at the things I said,
• 1:23:51
  Speaker 5: she has forgiven me. She did say that she will
• 1:23:54
  Speaker 5: not stay if I ever bend down to the will
• 1:23:56
  Speaker 5: of my family again, which I understand. Honestly, hot for
• 1:24:00
  Speaker 5: your girlfriend to say that.
• 1:24:01
  Speaker 3: Yeah, she said, the second I see you going back
• 1:24:05
  Speaker 3: to them, I'm out.
• 1:24:06
  Speaker 5: But that should have been said in the first place.
• 1:24:08
  Speaker 4: Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 1:24:09
  Speaker 5: You know what I mean?
• 1:24:10
  Speaker 3: The second that, I mean, again, she clearly has been
• 1:24:13
  Speaker 3: putting up with this for so long to have reached
• 1:24:16
  Speaker 3: a point where she just snapped.
• 1:24:18
  Speaker 5: Also, the fact that it's such a, you guys, it's
• 1:24:22
  Speaker 5: so funny. He was like, she's not mad anymore. She's
• 1:24:25
  Speaker 5: good now.
• 1:24:27
  Speaker 3: She said that she's good now, so she's good.
• 1:24:30
  Speaker 5: That's crazy, bro. Yeah, buddy. Yikes. Yeah, buddy. Don't know
• 1:24:34
  Speaker 5: what to tell you. You're dumb. You're a dumb guy.
• 1:24:36
  Speaker 3: This guy. This guy. This guy. He's a real keeper.
• 1:24:42
  Speaker 1: And that's the end of this story. Let's head to
• 1:24:44
  Speaker 1: the next one.
• 1:24:46
  Speaker 3: Hey, it's Carly, your favorite axolotl host here.
• 1:24:50
  Speaker 4: We're going to get back to the stories, but here's
• 1:24:52
  Speaker 4: three minutes of ads from our sponsors.
• 1:24:54
  Speaker 3: My boyfriend is always late to everything, and I refuse
• 1:24:58
  Speaker 3: to let it happen again.
• 1:24:59
  Speaker 5: Girl, don't let it be late to that breakup.
• 1:25:01
  Speaker 3: My 23 female boyfriend, 25 male, has a history of
• 1:25:05
  Speaker 3: being late. and unprepared to pre-planned events and gatherings. Sometimes
• 1:25:10
  Speaker 3: it can be annoying, but more often or not, it's
• 1:25:12
  Speaker 3: really no big deal. Usually when he comes over, he'll say,
• 1:25:15
  Speaker 3: I'll be over in an hour, and magically that hour
• 1:25:17
  Speaker 3: will turn to three hours. It happened on my birthday
• 1:25:21
  Speaker 3: when he said he'd be over at 10 a.m. and
• 1:25:23
  Speaker 3: he wasn't over till noon.
• 1:25:24
  Speaker 2: There was traffic.
• 1:25:26
  Speaker 3: There was traffic in my bedroom.
• 1:25:28
  Speaker 2: The elevator was broken, yeah.
• 1:25:30
  Speaker 5: I spent 30 minutes in the shower.
• 1:25:31
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm sorry. And again, when we were going out
• 1:25:34
  Speaker 3: with friends and 10 minutes before we were supposed to meet,
• 1:25:37
  Speaker 3: he asked my opinion on a surfboard. He's at a
• 1:25:41
  Speaker 3: sports store.
• 1:25:42
  Speaker 4: Sick.
• 1:25:44
  Speaker 5: We're talking about LA, dog. Whoa.
• 1:25:46
  Speaker 3: Though it can be a bit annoying. It's not like
• 1:25:48
  Speaker 3: I have a time crunch, and it usually doesn't bother
• 1:25:51
  Speaker 3: me except for the following time. We took a trip
• 1:25:53
  Speaker 3: to a place about a six-hour drive from where we are.
• 1:25:56
  Speaker 3: We're going to leave right after work around 6 p.m.,
• 1:25:59
  Speaker 3: but we don't leave until around 10.
• 1:26:02
  Speaker 5: Whoa.
• 1:26:02
  Speaker 4: Six hours?
• 1:26:03
  Speaker 3: We're going on a six-hour drive at 10.
• 1:26:05
  Speaker 5: P.m.? Yeah, where do you got to be, bro?
• 1:26:07
  Speaker 3: Because he was simply late to come pick me up.
• 1:26:10
  Speaker 3: It was one of the worst drives because we were
• 1:26:11
  Speaker 3: both extremely tired. We had to stop at a rest
• 1:26:15
  Speaker 3: stop to sleep for a couple hours, woke up at
• 1:26:17
  Speaker 3: 4 a.m. after awful uncomfy sleep in the back of
• 1:26:19
  Speaker 3: his car, and my dog peed in the car while
• 1:26:22
  Speaker 3: we were asleep.
• 1:26:23
  Speaker 5: Oh, great.
• 1:26:24
  Speaker 3: We got to our hotel that morning at 8.30 slash
• 1:26:26
  Speaker 3: 9 a.m. and slept basically through the day, taking a
• 1:26:30
  Speaker 3: whole day out of our vacation after a super stressful
• 1:26:33
  Speaker 3: commute that was much longer than it needed to be,
• 1:26:36
  Speaker 3: as well as wasted an entire day to just recover.
• 1:26:39
  Speaker 3: By the way, this comes from Unlucky Amoeba2473, and if
• 1:26:43
  Speaker 3: you want to submit your own stories, go to the
• 1:26:44
  Speaker 3: r slash okstorytime subreddit. I'm Sophia.
• 1:26:47
  Speaker 5: And I'm Mike.
• 1:26:48
  Speaker 2: And I'm Keon.
• 1:26:49
  Speaker 3: And we're here to give good advice goofily, but we
• 1:26:50
  Speaker 3: don't have all the answers. We only know what we know.
• 1:26:54
  Speaker 3: So if you know something else, put it down below.
• 1:26:56
  Speaker 3: OP continues, knowing this, we are going on a trip
• 1:26:59
  Speaker 3: tomorrow where next week I have to work on site,
• 1:27:02
  Speaker 3: but we are taking this weekend to vacation. However, this
• 1:27:04
  Speaker 3: specific trip is known to have awful traffic, sometimes getting
• 1:27:08
  Speaker 3: through 26 miles of Part of the stretch can take
• 1:27:12
  Speaker 3: between 40 minutes and four hours if you go at
• 1:27:15
  Speaker 3: the wrong time.
• 1:27:16
  Speaker 2: Sounds like a stereotypical day in L.A.
• 1:27:18
  Speaker 3: I think they are in L.A. or in California.
• 1:27:21
  Speaker 5: Yeah, this is from Burbank, California right here. This story
• 1:27:24
  Speaker 5: comes from Burbank, California.
• 1:27:25
  Speaker 3: This is from Santa Monica to Burbank. He's aware of this.
• 1:27:29
  Speaker 3: I told my boyfriend that we are leaving my place
• 1:27:31
  Speaker 3: at 1 p.m. to beat traffic. I would want to
• 1:27:34
  Speaker 3: go earlier, but I know he's not an early riser.
• 1:27:36
  Speaker 2: And you lie.
• 1:27:38
  Speaker 4: Yeah, you lie.
• 1:27:38
  Speaker 2: He said we have to leave.
• 1:27:40
  Speaker 3: At 6 a.m., so he gets up at 9. Yeah.
• 1:27:43
  Speaker 3: At one, we're not coming into my place to get
• 1:27:45
  Speaker 3: some food or to bring things down to the car
• 1:27:47
  Speaker 3: or to go to the bathroom. We're leaving my driveway
• 1:27:50
  Speaker 3: at one exactly and no later. Earlier, if possible. When
• 1:27:53
  Speaker 3: I said this, he kind of got annoyed and was
• 1:27:55
  Speaker 3: passive aggressive towards me for the rest of the conversation.
• 1:27:58
  Speaker 3: I sensed this and told them about how much our
• 1:28:00
  Speaker 3: last trip sucked because instead of traveling for six hours,
• 1:28:04
  Speaker 3: we traveled almost 11 and then wasted a whole day
• 1:28:07
  Speaker 3: sleeping it off.
• 1:28:08
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 1:28:09
  Speaker 5: Yeah, so not only does this happen before, it's happening again.
• 1:28:12
  Speaker 3: It's happening right now.
• 1:28:13
  Speaker 5: Yeah, it's literally happening again when you miss a day
• 1:28:15
  Speaker 5: out of your vacation.
• 1:28:17
  Speaker 3: Yeah, and that's the worst when you're trying to like
• 1:28:19
  Speaker 3: talk to someone and then they're just annoyed because they're like, oh, well,
• 1:28:22
  Speaker 3: you're telling me what to do.
• 1:28:23
  Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 1:28:25
  Speaker 3: I will tell you what to do.
• 1:28:26
  Speaker 2: Shut up.
• 1:28:26
  Speaker 3: You need me to tell you what to do. He said, yeah,
• 1:28:29
  Speaker 3: he gets it, but that I'm making the trip stressful
• 1:28:31
  Speaker 3: and it makes him not want to go at all.
• 1:28:33
  Speaker 2: Well, we might not be going. Then don't go. You
• 1:28:35
  Speaker 2: know what? You stay.
• 1:28:37
  Speaker 5: Just get left behind, dude.
• 1:28:38
  Speaker 3: Four hours of bumper-to-bumper traffic is so much worse than
• 1:28:41
  Speaker 3: leaving on time, in my opinion.
• 1:28:43
  Speaker 4: It is.
• 1:28:44
  Speaker 3: But he says I'm stressing him out by setting such
• 1:28:47
  Speaker 3: a strict time with high expectations, which in his words,
• 1:28:50
  Speaker 3: give me a-hole-like qualities.
• 1:28:54
  Speaker 1: He is on thin ice.
• 1:28:58
  Speaker 4: Oh, oh, he is.
• 1:28:59
  Speaker 3: He's dancing on the line.
• 1:29:01
  Speaker 5: Oh, brother's skating right now. He's doing tricks on it, bro.
• 1:29:06
  Speaker 4: Holy moly. Flip.
• 1:29:08
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 1:29:08
  Speaker 3: Over what he could say to his girlfriend. He's like,
• 1:29:11
  Speaker 3: you're not an a-hole.
• 1:29:12
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 1:29:12
  Speaker 3: You have a-hole-like qualities.
• 1:29:15
  Speaker 5: Yeah, he's got a-hole tendencies. Yeah, yeah.
• 1:29:17
  Speaker 3: And she's like, did you just call me an a-hole?
• 1:29:18
  Speaker 4: He's like, no.
• 1:29:20
  Speaker 5: No. It's not what I said.
• 1:29:22
  Speaker 3: It's not what I said. Am I the a-hole for
• 1:29:25
  Speaker 3: insisting we leave right at one? I could be the
• 1:29:28
  Speaker 3: a-hole because I didn't let him choose the time, but
• 1:29:30
  Speaker 3: he originally wanted us to leave at midnight tonight.
• 1:29:33
  Speaker 5: Yeah, bro. Whose trip is this now?
• 1:29:36
  Speaker 3: You know, he wanted you to leave at midnight.
• 1:29:39
  Speaker 5: Dog, that would make zeros. And yeah, let's just waste
• 1:29:43
  Speaker 5: even more time on this. Getting to this place.
• 1:29:47
  Speaker 3: You know, if he said, oh, we're leaving at midnight.
• 1:29:49
  Speaker 3: I'd be like, okay, you're driving.
• 1:29:50
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 1:29:51
  Speaker 4: You're driving. I'm sleeping.
• 1:29:52
  Speaker 5: You're driving. No, catch me in the backseat.
• 1:29:54
  Speaker 3: This isn't feasible because our Airbnb only checks people in
• 1:29:58
  Speaker 3: from 3 p.m. to 7 p.m. And I do not
• 1:30:00
  Speaker 3: want to repeat the events of the last trip. Edit,
• 1:30:03
  Speaker 3: my car is currently at the shop, so I would
• 1:30:04
  Speaker 3: not be able to drive on my own this time.
• 1:30:07
  Speaker 3: Usually we do drive separately to things because we live
• 1:30:09
  Speaker 3: 30 minutes away from each other and it takes too
• 1:30:11
  Speaker 3: much time to pick each other up. And at two,
• 1:30:14
  Speaker 3: he does not have a set time he has to
• 1:30:15
  Speaker 3: be at work. He works his salary job, so as
• 1:30:18
  Speaker 3: long as he puts in 40 hours and gets his
• 1:30:20
  Speaker 3: stuff done, he can roll in at any time.
• 1:30:23
  Speaker 2: Ah, makes sense.
• 1:30:24
  Speaker 3: Yeah, perfect job for this guy. He's like, I don't know,
• 1:30:26
  Speaker 3: I go in at midnight.
• 1:30:27
  Speaker 5: Bro, this guy would be late to his own funeral.
• 1:30:30
  Speaker 6: He would be.
• 1:30:30
  Speaker 5: If he had the chance, bro.
• 1:30:32
  Speaker 3: He'd be like, where's the body?
• 1:30:33
  Speaker 1: It's coming.
• 1:30:34
  Speaker 4: It's coming midnight.
• 1:30:35
  Speaker 3: There is an update. I would be so done. I
• 1:30:38
  Speaker 3: would be so done.
• 1:30:40
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 1:30:41
  Speaker 3: I can't stand this.
• 1:30:42
  Speaker 2: He's the type of guy who says, time's money, but
• 1:30:43
  Speaker 2: only on my time, you know?
• 1:30:45
  Speaker 5: Yeah. Yeah.
• 1:30:46
  Speaker 3: It's like, oh, well, whenever I want to go.
• 1:30:47
  Speaker 5: This guy is getting paid 75 cents for... an hour
• 1:30:52
  Speaker 5: yeah what are we talking about no this.
• 1:30:54
  Speaker 3: Is this is so frustrating i i would cancel the
• 1:30:57
  Speaker 3: trip honestly no cancel it baby the day of our
• 1:31:00
  Speaker 3: trip my boyfriend showed up to my place at 12
• 1:31:03
  Speaker 3: 30 okay they're supposed to leave at one okay unless
• 1:31:07
  Speaker 3: you showed up at midnight okay all right time crunch
• 1:31:11
  Speaker 3: king with only the prompting I told y'all about in
• 1:31:13
  Speaker 3: the previous post. So I'm glad that even if he
• 1:31:16
  Speaker 3: was a bit upset about being strict on the time,
• 1:31:18
  Speaker 3: he definitely showed up and we ended up leaving early
• 1:31:21
  Speaker 3: at 1255. As for his chronic lateness, we did talk
• 1:31:24
  Speaker 3: about it on the road. After thinking about it, it
• 1:31:27
  Speaker 3: kind of annoyed me that he was late on my birthday.
• 1:31:31
  Speaker 4: There it is.
• 1:31:31
  Speaker 3: Why didn't someone mention that?
• 1:31:33
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:31:33
  Speaker 3: I actually didn't like that he was three hours late
• 1:31:35
  Speaker 3: on my birthday.
• 1:31:37
  Speaker 5: Yeah. That was such like a shoehorn in too. I
• 1:31:39
  Speaker 5: was like, oh yeah, by the way, he's like late
• 1:31:41
  Speaker 5: to like all my stuff. He was late to the
• 1:31:43
  Speaker 5: birth of my kid, but who cares? It was fun though. Yeah.
• 1:31:46
  Speaker 5: It's okay. No, it's totally fine. Yeah. No, we love
• 1:31:48
  Speaker 5: each other.
• 1:31:49
  Speaker 3: We love each other so much. And that he was
• 1:31:51
  Speaker 3: always a couple of hours late when coming over. I
• 1:31:54
  Speaker 3: told him that those instances made me feel like he
• 1:31:56
  Speaker 3: didn't respect my time. He said he was extremely sorry
• 1:31:59
  Speaker 3: and that he's been having a rough time adjusting to traffic.
• 1:32:03
  Speaker 3: in the fact that it takes a lot of time
• 1:32:05
  Speaker 3: to get anywhere. We live in a large metropolitan area,
• 1:32:08
  Speaker 3: but we used to live in the Midwest in the
• 1:32:10
  Speaker 3: middle of nowhere. So from calculating commute time, traffic, and
• 1:32:13
  Speaker 3: him having alone time, he was just having some trouble.
• 1:32:16
  Speaker 3: We agreed that his lateness was frustrating and came up
• 1:32:19
  Speaker 3: with the following solution to hopefully fix the problem. On
• 1:32:22
  Speaker 3: big road trips like this, we will want to leave
• 1:32:24
  Speaker 3: exactly on time or earlier. We will plan to meet
• 1:32:27
  Speaker 3: at each other's place at least 30 minutes to an
• 1:32:29
  Speaker 3: hour before we plan to leave to make sure that
• 1:32:31
  Speaker 3: we're on time. On events like birthdays or outings with friends,
• 1:32:35
  Speaker 3: he'll schedule the event into his phone 30 minutes before
• 1:32:38
  Speaker 3: he has to be.
• 1:32:39
  Speaker 5: This is the one. I'm going to get it right
• 1:32:41
  Speaker 5: this time.
• 1:32:42
  Speaker 3: He's like, oh, finally.
• 1:32:43
  Speaker 5: If I put it in my phone, I know I'm
• 1:32:46
  Speaker 5: going to get into it now. What's that? I got
• 1:32:48
  Speaker 5: five minutes to leave?
• 1:32:49
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 1:32:50
  Speaker 3: If I have a timer, then it's fine.
• 1:32:52
  Speaker 5: Then I'm going to be okay.
• 1:32:53
  Speaker 3: Before he has to be at the event so that
• 1:32:55
  Speaker 3: if he forgot or lost track of time until that moment...
• 1:32:58
  Speaker 3: he has some time to drive and be at the
• 1:33:00
  Speaker 3: event somewhat on time. When he comes staying out, instead
• 1:33:03
  Speaker 3: of just saying, I'll be over in an hour because
• 1:33:06
  Speaker 3: he's bad ETA estimator, he will say what he plans
• 1:33:09
  Speaker 3: on doing before coming over so we can both create
• 1:33:12
  Speaker 3: a better ETA.
• 1:33:13
  Speaker 4: Example, him.
• 1:33:14
  Speaker 3: I want to drive home, shower, and pick up groceries
• 1:33:17
  Speaker 3: before driving to your place.
• 1:33:18
  Speaker 5: Fair. Me?
• 1:33:19
  Speaker 3: Okay, that sounds like that might take about two hours,
• 1:33:22
  Speaker 3: including travel time.
• 1:33:25
  Speaker 6: Yep.
• 1:33:25
  Speaker 3: As for people suggesting ADHD, he says he's unsure of
• 1:33:28
  Speaker 3: where to go to for now. But he may look
• 1:33:30
  Speaker 3: into it, as he and I have never thought that
• 1:33:32
  Speaker 3: ADHD could be the cause of this. But the time
• 1:33:35
  Speaker 3: when he was looking at surfboards when he was supposed
• 1:33:37
  Speaker 3: to be at our meeting place definitely points to this.
• 1:33:40
  Speaker 3: Thank you for sharing this point of view. We never
• 1:33:42
  Speaker 3: would have known.
• 1:33:42
  Speaker 2: I mean, listen, Mike. Are you late? Are you late?
• 1:33:46
  Speaker 5: Dude, I was late today.
• 1:33:47
  Speaker 3: You were late today. But you weren't three hours late.
• 1:33:51
  Speaker 5: I was not three hours late.
• 1:33:52
  Speaker 2: Am I late?
• 1:33:53
  Speaker 5: Yeah. Yeah, right?
• 1:33:54
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Sometimes it's... It's in our blood.
• 1:33:57
  Speaker 3: In LA, if you're like within 30 minutes, you're on time.
• 1:34:01
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 1:34:01
  Speaker 3: If you're within an hour, you're like, oh, okay. There
• 1:34:03
  Speaker 3: shouldn't be a place that's.
• 1:34:04
  Speaker 5: Like, Three o'clock sharp. You know what I mean? Never.
• 1:34:11
  Speaker 5: We're going out to lunch. I'll meet you at 2.
• 1:34:14
  Speaker 3: I'll meet you somewhere in the range of 2 to 2.30.
• 1:34:17
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 1:34:17
  Speaker 5: They're dead ass, dude.
• 1:34:19
  Speaker 3: We don't know. There could be an accident on the way.
• 1:34:22
  Speaker 3: We don't know.
• 1:34:23
  Speaker 2: But becoming multiple hours late to just everything is terrible.
• 1:34:31
  Speaker 5: No, yeah, that's something entirely different going on with that guy.
• 1:34:36
  Speaker 2: And I always, like, even if I'm, like, 10 minutes
• 1:34:38
  Speaker 2: late to something important because of traffic or I couldn't
• 1:34:40
  Speaker 2: find parking or something, I'm like, sorry, guys, I feel bad. Like,
• 1:34:43
  Speaker 2: at least I apologize.
• 1:34:44
  Speaker 3: I'm like, hey, I'm sorry I'm on my way.
• 1:34:46
  Speaker 2: But this guy's just like, yeah, okay, we're chilling.
• 1:34:49
  Speaker 3: We got a little bit more, though.
• 1:34:50
  Speaker 5: Oh, we do.
• 1:34:52
  Speaker 3: I understand for a lot of people this might have
• 1:34:54
  Speaker 3: been a breaking point. It's one of his only problems.
• 1:34:57
  Speaker 3: In almost every other aspect of our relationship, he's been
• 1:35:00
  Speaker 3: nothing but a great boyfriend who loves and supports me
• 1:35:03
  Speaker 3: and my goals and as a human being.
• 1:35:05
  Speaker 5: Wow.
• 1:35:05
  Speaker 3: So although I think some of those opinions are kind
• 1:35:08
  Speaker 3: of extreme, thank you for your point of view because
• 1:35:10
  Speaker 3: it did help me put my foot down and have
• 1:35:12
  Speaker 3: this conversation. Edit, I would really like to thank everyone
• 1:35:16
  Speaker 3: who gave me advice on the ADHD aspect of this.
• 1:35:18
  Speaker 3: Someone in the comments listed symptoms of their own ADHD,
• 1:35:22
  Speaker 3: and it sounded exactly like him. I'm also really grateful
• 1:35:25
  Speaker 3: for all of you who have provided a way to
• 1:35:27
  Speaker 3: step in a direction to find a diagnosis. We didn't
• 1:35:30
  Speaker 3: really know where to start, but this whole thread was
• 1:35:32
  Speaker 3: super helpful. Thank you so much. Well, there we go.
• 1:35:35
  Speaker 3: I guess they're on the path to a solution.
• 1:35:38
  Speaker 5: Wow. Good for them. Happy ending.
• 1:35:40
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I know.
• 1:35:41
  Speaker 5: It'll probably take probably a couple years.
• 1:35:43
  Speaker 4: Yeah, in three years, they'll figure it out.
• 1:35:46
  Speaker 1: And that's the end of this story.