Latest / Networking Unleashed: Building Profitable Connections / Networking Unleashed: S1E93 An Interview with Andy Semotiuk and Michael A Forman, Public Speaker
Transcript
- 0:16Welcome to Networking Unleashed, Building Profitable
- 0:20Connections, the podcast where we explore the
- 0:23art and science of building powerful relationships
- 0:27that drive real business results. I'm your host,
- 0:31Michael, and today we're diving deep into the
- 0:35intersection of networking, motivation, and communication,
- 0:39especially as we relate to immigrant experience.
- 0:44Our guest is a dynamic expert whose journey spans
- 0:48overcoming barriers, motivating others and mastering
- 0:52the nuances of cross -cultural communication.
- 0:56Whether you're new to networking or a seasoned
- 0:59pro, you'll discover actionable insights to foster
- 1:03authentic connections and unlock new opportunities.
- 1:07So get ready to be inspired. as we uncover practical
- 1:12strategies for building networks that are not
- 1:15just expansive, but truly profitable and meaningful.
- 1:20So let's get started. I'd like to introduce Andy
- 1:24Semichuk. Semichuk, okay. I'm almost there, almost
- 1:31there. No problem. He does have this vast background,
- 1:33but Andy, I would like to introduce you and tell
- 1:37us a little bit about your background. Sure.
- 1:39Well, I was born in Edmonton, Alberta, Canada,
- 1:42and raised half in Canada and half in the United
- 1:46States. For example, school -wise, I was going
- 1:50initially in Canada, but later in high school,
- 1:54I went to school in Los Angeles. And that's because
- 1:58My mother had a sister who lived in Los Angeles,
- 2:01and they bicycled me back and forth. So, for
- 2:03example, summers I spent in Los Angeles, but
- 2:06during the school year, I spent up in Edmonton
- 2:09in the cold. And then as time went on, as it
- 2:13turned out, my whole life was like that. Half
- 2:15of my time was in Canada and half of my time
- 2:18in the United States. So, for example, although
- 2:22I studied in Canada at UBC in Vancouver, got
- 2:26my law degree and so on, I actually practiced
- 2:29for 10 years in Los Angeles. I practiced for
- 2:33five years in New York. And I am now practicing
- 2:36in Toronto in Ontario, Canada. Wow, that's great.
- 2:41That's quite an expansive background you have
- 2:43there. So that's good. All right. So I'm going
- 2:46to jump right into the questions that I've developed
- 2:49for you. And hopefully we've made the mark. We've
- 2:53hit the mark. What role has networking played?
- 2:57in your own journey as an immigrant, and how
- 3:00did it shape your success? That's a great question,
- 3:05and you don't even realize how good a question
- 3:08that is, I think, and I'll tell you why. For
- 3:11three years, when I was in Los Angeles, I was
- 3:15chairperson of the Beverly Hills Bar Association
- 3:18Networking Committee. And during those three
- 3:22years, we had monthly meetings where I had to
- 3:27get things going and get people networking. And
- 3:31I had a philosophy that I espoused during those
- 3:34meetings. And the meetings went like this. After
- 3:37everybody got settled, they picked up some drinks
- 3:40or whatever and spoke to some people. I would
- 3:43call the meeting to order. And we're all standing
- 3:46around. And I would say I'm Andy Semichuk, and
- 3:50I'm chairman of the Beverly Hills Bar Association
- 3:52Networking Committee, and I want to welcome you.
- 3:56And I'd like to express a philosophy of networking
- 3:59that I'm hoping you will like and perhaps adapt
- 4:03in your networking efforts. And that philosophy
- 4:07comes from one of the great speakers in the United
- 4:10States, a guy named Zig Ziglar. Absolutely. You
- 4:16probably know him, yeah? Yes, I do. I follow
- 4:18him extensively. Okay. So he used to say, you
- 4:22can get anything in life that you want so long
- 4:25as you help enough other people get what they
- 4:27want. And I believe that's a great philosophical
- 4:31approach to networking. And I would say to the
- 4:35people there, focus on the people you're dealing
- 4:38with. See if there's anything you can do to help
- 4:41them and see how that in turn comes around to
- 4:44help you. And I'd often share a story or a joke
- 4:48just to liven things up and then set them loose
- 4:53to doing the networking. But there were a few
- 4:57things about networking that I sort of picked
- 5:00up. And I was an immigrant there because I was
- 5:04born in Canada. That's why it's special that
- 5:07you asked that question. So as an quote unquote
- 5:10immigrant to the United States, I myself had
- 5:14to employ my networking skills to make a go of
- 5:18me as a U .S. immigration attorney in Los Angeles.
- 5:23And here are some of the tactics that I employed
- 5:27to advance my cause. I learned that All of this
- 5:33stuff, it's hard to come up with a unique idea
- 5:35or original idea. A lot of our ideas are borrowed
- 5:38from other people or developed from other people's
- 5:41ideas. Certainly that's the case with me. I can't
- 5:44claim originality to everything I'm talking about.
- 5:47That's mission impossible for me. But one of
- 5:51the thoughts that did me well. in my networking
- 5:54efforts. And I'm so glad that your program is
- 5:58about networking. It's a real treat for me to
- 6:01be on your program and talk about networking
- 6:03and also about motivation that we'll talk about,
- 6:07I'm sure. A few little tips. Number one, I learned
- 6:12long ago that in terms of networking, it's very
- 6:17handy if you're a newcomer to come early to meetings.
- 6:23Vince Lombardi, the great coach of the Green
- 6:26Bay Packers, used to say, if you're 10 minutes
- 6:30early, that means you're 15 minutes late to his
- 6:33players. What he was saying was, of course, come
- 6:36early. Don't come just on time. Come early. It's
- 6:39always helpful to come early. And in networking,
- 6:42that's especially true because if you're early
- 6:46as people come into the room, They have nobody
- 6:50to really deal with except you. If you're standing
- 6:53there smiling and looking to say something. That's
- 6:57true. I'm a military guy, Air Force. And we had
- 7:01one saying that if you're on time, you're late.
- 7:05If you're early, you're on time. Yeah, that's
- 7:08great. Love it. I live my life that way. My poor
- 7:12children who had to grow up with that, now they're
- 7:15doing it. So I know exactly what you're talking
- 7:18about. Zig Ziglar was the best. And that's what's
- 7:23called a servant's heart. Now, I follow more
- 7:26of Zig Ziglar's son because Zig isn't around
- 7:30anymore. But it's a giver's game. It's what BNI
- 7:35has structured their whole thing about. But it's
- 7:39true because when you go to a networking event,
- 7:43it's... what you can do for somebody else, not
- 7:47what they can do for you. I didn't mean to interrupt.
- 7:49No, I'm happy you threw that in. That's exactly
- 7:52right. That's gold level thinking in my world.
- 7:56But that was one key because they'd show up and
- 8:00they don't have anybody to talk to. So they wander
- 8:02over to talk to you and you then start on a journey
- 8:05with them. And my approach was like this, and
- 8:09I teach my young people here in my law practice
- 8:13this approach. If you're talking to someone in
- 8:18networking or just talking to someone in a cocktail
- 8:21type situation, your job is to focus on that
- 8:27person and never mind what else is going on in
- 8:31the room. Never mind if President Trump just
- 8:35is walking by behind the person you're talking
- 8:37to or any football star or baseball star or whatever.
- 8:42It's important to train yourself on the person
- 8:45you're talking to. Everything else is irrelevant.
- 8:49That's the whole idea here. It's inconsiderate
- 8:53to use another person you're dealing with. You
- 8:59see these guys, they're talking to you, but they
- 9:01watch as someone goes by. You know how you feel
- 9:04when that happens. Absolutely. It's called active
- 9:07listening. So you listen to the person who you're
- 9:11with. You give them 100 % of your attention.
- 9:15And here's the funny part about active listening.
- 9:19It's after they finish speaking, you pause. And
- 9:23that's such an important pause because it gives
- 9:26you time to digest what they said. It gives them
- 9:30time to say he was listening to me. And then
- 9:34you respond to him with something that he spoke
- 9:37about. So you don't want to talk about something
- 9:40that you have on your agenda because that really
- 9:43doesn't matter. You want to respond to something
- 9:46that. he was talking about because it shows that
- 9:49you were paying 100 % attention. So active listening.
- 9:56Yes. Very insightful. I have a lot of these.
- 9:58Okay. Let me go with the second question. Sure.
- 10:02What unique challenges do immigrants face when
- 10:06building professional connections and how can
- 10:09they overcome it? A big challenge is cultural.
- 10:15You're coming into a new society, obviously a
- 10:18society different than the one you're used to.
- 10:21And a big deal about that is language, learning
- 10:26the language of the new society. Now, in my life,
- 10:30like I speak a few languages, I'm Ukrainian in
- 10:34background, so I learned Ukrainian growing up
- 10:36and stuff like that. And I've been able to pick
- 10:39up a little bit on the Slavic element. I've also
- 10:44studied Spanish and French, and it's been hard,
- 10:49a hard goal. And so I'm thinking from the point
- 10:52of view of someone new who's trying to learn
- 10:55English, what can I do to offer them some help
- 11:00in picking up the language? And one of the big
- 11:04things that I learned in studying other languages
- 11:07was about cognates. I don't know if you know
- 11:11the word cognated. I didn't know the word when
- 11:14I first heard it. And it's words that are the
- 11:19same in other languages. So, for example, transportation,
- 11:24the word transportation or communication in French
- 11:29or in Spanish, transportation in Ukrainian, they're
- 11:34all the same. It's a cognate. Because languages
- 11:38are a mixture of various languages. Over time,
- 11:41they're influenced by each other. Communication,
- 11:45transportation, pretty much all words ending
- 11:49in T -I -O -N are such cognates. And other words,
- 11:54and I can't give you examples because I wasn't
- 11:55expecting to talk on this exact topic right now,
- 11:59but I looked it up. And as much as perhaps 30
- 12:04or 40 % of a new language for you may consist
- 12:09of words you already know because they're cognates.
- 12:13And if you go through a dictionary, you can pick
- 12:16up those cognates. And it's astounding that you
- 12:20may know 30 or 40 % of a language even before
- 12:23you started. What a gift, what a boost that is.
- 12:27A great thing. For you, just because I know two
- 12:32languages, English and English. My two languages.
- 12:37I took Spanish in school and I can understand
- 12:40somewhat. But that's very interesting that those...
- 12:45Cognates, you're talking? Cognates. That's the
- 12:48word for it. Very interesting. Yeah. Now, in
- 12:52picking up languages, other things, and why am
- 12:56I focused on language? Because I would say language.
- 12:59is the critical element to integrate into a new
- 13:03community. And if you don't focus on it and get
- 13:07it down hard, you're going to be behind in terms
- 13:12of getting ahead in that community. A lot of
- 13:16my clients, English is a second language. And
- 13:21the first thing that I go over with them is that
- 13:25they have to enunciate. their words because they're
- 13:30either saying them too fast or they're putting
- 13:33the words together. So when I help them with
- 13:36their diction, when they're enunciating, it slows
- 13:39them down and people can actually understand
- 13:43them that much better. So it all has to do with
- 13:47the language. Good tip. Now, there's a lot we
- 13:50could talk about language. For example, I just
- 13:52share a little insight from my uncle who's passed
- 13:56away. But during World War II, he was a translator.
- 13:58He knew 13 languages. But he didn't know English.
- 14:03And when the war ended, he was in Vienna. And
- 14:08he thought, gee, the American zone, I got to
- 14:11learn English. And what he did is he bought a
- 14:14German -English dictionary. He knew German. And
- 14:20he... He had a photographic memory, so he read
- 14:24the whole dictionary. And then what he did is
- 14:27he listened to Allied Radio Army broadcasts on
- 14:33the hour of the news. And they repeated the news
- 14:37every hour on the hour. And he read newspapers
- 14:42and underlined words he didn't understand, looked
- 14:45them up in the dictionary, and kept just word
- 14:47by word, sentence by sentence, Sound by sound,
- 14:51he picked up English within, he said something
- 14:53like six months. And he reported to the general,
- 14:57to the chief general, American general. He comes
- 15:00up to him, somehow he got in there, and he says,
- 15:03I'm reporting for duty. And the general says,
- 15:05duty? What kind of duty? He says, translator.
- 15:09I don't need a translator. What languages do
- 15:11you speak? He said, what language do you want?
- 15:14He spoke 13 of them. The American general goes,
- 15:17Russian. French or whatever it was through 13.
- 15:20Because, okay, report over to so -and -so. You're
- 15:24hired. That's great. That's great. Yeah. Okay.
- 15:27So let's go on to another question. Sure. Can
- 15:30you share a story where networking directly impacted
- 15:33an opportunity or breakthrough in your career?
- 15:37That's a tough one for me, but I've already mentioned
- 15:40it. I became chairman of the Beverly Hills Bar
- 15:44Association. networking committee because I used
- 15:48the skills we talked about earlier to rise to
- 15:52that level. And that opened the door to me to
- 15:57a whole community of lawyers, at least, who wanted
- 16:03to get to know me because of my position. And
- 16:08so it made it easy for me to, as an immigrant,
- 16:11as we were talking earlier, integrate into that
- 16:14community. And through that community, I was
- 16:18able to reach out to other communities and become
- 16:22involved, entrenched in other. I was in the Century
- 16:25City area of Hollywood, which is where they used
- 16:30to meet. And I got to know a lot of people in
- 16:33that area. I used to go, there's nothing like
- 16:36attending meetings to get to know people. And
- 16:39if you have networking skills, you're automatically
- 16:42like, they had a thing called speed dating, networking,
- 16:46networking stuff. Sure. I know. Sure. Absolutely.
- 16:51I know it all too well. Okay. We had those sessions
- 16:55where you had whatever, three or five minutes
- 16:57with someone and then each. telling each other
- 17:00what you do, and then go on to the next chair
- 17:03and talk to another person and so on. And over
- 17:06time, you develop a nice string of people that
- 17:09are friendly and start socializing and so on.
- 17:12So it helped me break into American society.
- 17:16And what society? The Beverly Hills Bar Association
- 17:20and Hollywood and Century City, which was really
- 17:24valuable to me. Which was, I'm sure, which was...
- 17:29And the fact that you were trying to integrate
- 17:32yourself with everybody else, it was just an
- 17:37easier way. And by you knowing all of what you
- 17:40know, networking wise and communication wise,
- 17:44made it that much easier. Okay. So how do you
- 17:47stay motivated to keep building and nurturing
- 17:50your network, especially through tough transactions
- 17:53or setbacks? Okay. Here we're touching on a key
- 17:58area of focus, and it's what I call your unique
- 18:03ability. And I'll share it with you in this way.
- 18:07There's a good story that kind of focuses on
- 18:10the area. It's the story of Carl Wallenda, who
- 18:14was one of the world's leading tightrope walkers.
- 18:19I know him well. Ah, okay. So you may probably
- 18:22know that he tried to walk a tightrope between
- 18:27two high -rises in San Juan, Puerto Rico, I think
- 18:31in the 1980s, and fell to his death. Fell to
- 18:36his death. But before he died, he was interviewed
- 18:40by reporters, and they asked him, why do you
- 18:46walk the tightrope? Why do you take such risks
- 18:50with your life? And he answered this in this
- 18:53way. He said, I live my life on the tightrope.
- 18:59That's when I really live. And everything before
- 19:04is a mere prelude to, and everything after is
- 19:09a postscript following my life on the tightrope.
- 19:14And that's now. What he was saying is, it's so
- 19:20important to me. I'm willing to even risk death
- 19:23to do this. And from reading about other people,
- 19:29for example, Elvis Presley, he felt really alive
- 19:34only on the stage when he performed in front
- 19:37of audiences. There's a tennis player, I think
- 19:42his name was Roger Ash. who used to talk about
- 19:45flow, that there was a state that he would get
- 19:49into, and all these sports personalities, they
- 19:51all talk about flow, where they're just in a
- 19:57moment when everything else doesn't matter. They're
- 20:00just in their unique abilities, what I call unique
- 20:05ability. So the key is, what is your unique ability?
- 20:11And if you can find it, can you find activity
- 20:14and work in that area and the reason why that's
- 20:19so significant is because if you're working in
- 20:24your area of unique ability you're at your best
- 20:29it's where your passion is you're giving the
- 20:34world the best you have and the world senses
- 20:39that And it responds to you. Now, a good story
- 20:43about that is, if you look over my shoulder,
- 20:45you'll see a tab up there. It's from Toastmasters,
- 20:48some organization you probably know a lot about.
- 20:51Sure do. So I was in Toastmasters for 35 years.
- 20:56And I attended club meetings for 35 years, weekly
- 21:00club meetings, where we practiced public speaking
- 21:04and leadership skills for 35 years. And I thought,
- 21:10this is my unique ability. This is where I am
- 21:12the best. But the world didn't want me there.
- 21:16No, they said, Andy, you don't belong there.
- 21:19The world said, we want you to write articles,
- 21:23journal, books. And so the world guided me to
- 21:29where I needed to be. It helped me find my unique
- 21:33ability. Now, my unique ability, I believe, is
- 21:36in the area of communication, so verbal and written.
- 21:39But it's just an indication of how you get to
- 21:42your unique ability. Absolutely. Very good. Very
- 21:46well said, by the way. Thank you. Okay. What
- 21:49communication strategies have proven most effective
- 21:52for you when connecting with people from diverse
- 21:55backgrounds? Okay. I'm a big believer in stories,
- 22:01sharing stories, especially, for example, with
- 22:07people who are disadvantaged or young people,
- 22:10especially childhood memories, for example. We
- 22:14are all vulnerable to strong stories. I'm just
- 22:20reminded of an event that just took place last
- 22:23night where I was at a funeral celebration. And
- 22:27I talked about... I shared this story. There's
- 22:31this group of people called Lemkos who live in
- 22:36the mountains in western Ukraine, in the Carpathian
- 22:40Mountains. And they had a belief. And the belief
- 22:45was that when a person is born, a star appears
- 22:50in the sky. And when they pass on, when they
- 22:54cross, the footstep into eternity, the star disappears
- 23:01from the sky. And that's just a little example
- 23:06of a story that's captivating. It goes deep.
- 23:11There's a symbolic part to it, and there's something
- 23:16about the human experience in that story that
- 23:20makes it compelling. You know, where I'm concerned,
- 23:26at least for public speaking, corporate speaking,
- 23:29workshops, stories, people tend to remember stories.
- 23:35If I told them what to do out of a textbook,
- 23:38one through 10, and I told them a story with
- 23:41the same information, they'll remember 80 % of
- 23:45it more through the story than if I just gave
- 23:48them the text. So stories sell. Not only that,
- 23:52there's one other. aspect of this. I'm a big
- 23:55believer in humor. I think comedy goes a long
- 24:00way. That's me. Okay. Especially when you're
- 24:03trying to connect with an audience, the connection,
- 24:07an emotional connection through humor. If you
- 24:11can pass on some humor, maybe I can give you
- 24:14an example. Say, for example, this lady buys
- 24:19a parrot. And she brings him home. And she thinks,
- 24:24I'm going to teach this parrot how to talk. I
- 24:26wonder, what could I teach him? And she's got
- 24:29people coming in and out of her house. So she
- 24:31figures, when they knock on the door, I'll have
- 24:34the parrot say, who is it? So she taught the
- 24:36parrot to say, who is it? So now the parrot knows
- 24:40how to say, who is it? And she goes shopping
- 24:43one day and leaves the parrot back home. And
- 24:46someone comes to the door. A guy knocks on the
- 24:48door. Parrot says, who is it? The guy answers,
- 24:51it's the plumber. And the parrot says, who is
- 24:54it? The guy says, it's the plumber. Parrot says,
- 24:57who is it? And the guy says, it's the plumber.
- 25:00And the guy gets so exasperated, he faints and
- 25:04falls down on the steps. Meanwhile, the woman
- 25:07comes home and she opens the door and she sees
- 25:09this plumber, this guy lying on the ground. And
- 25:13she says, oh my goodness, I wonder who is it?
- 25:16And the parrot says. It's the blommer. Blommer.
- 25:20There's a joke like that can break the ice when
- 25:24you're trying to. Yeah, I always inject humor
- 25:31into every presentation that I give. And it usually
- 25:35just I use it more to have them pay attention
- 25:39to what I'm saying, as opposed to breaking up,
- 25:44because usually I have a good connection with
- 25:46the audience. But. When I throw humor in there,
- 25:49it's always just that much more. They connect
- 25:52with you that much more. Okay, so how can professionals
- 25:58ensure their networking is mutually beneficial
- 26:01rather than transactional? I guess the key answer
- 26:07there from my point of view is what's in your
- 26:11head? Why are you connecting with someone? And
- 26:16I'll tell a little story about that that will
- 26:18make the point. I had a close friend. His name
- 26:22was John Kolaski in Canada. And he was a unique
- 26:26individual because for 30 years, he was a member
- 26:32of the Communist Party of Canada. And it was
- 26:36a devout communist. And then one day in the 1970s,
- 26:40he was invited to the Soviet Union, to the upper
- 26:43higher. party school, and he went there for two
- 26:47years. And when he was there, he realized, oh,
- 26:51this is all garbage. I've been living a life
- 26:56of garbage for 30 years. And he came back. It
- 27:00was a traumatic experience for him. But he came
- 27:03back, and he reconciled himself with democracy
- 27:06and a more liberal kind of a point of view. One
- 27:11day, I'm in the library studying at UBC in Vancouver,
- 27:16and he was in Vancouver also. He was an author.
- 27:18He wrote books, and I saw him coming. And I look
- 27:22up, and I see him coming, and I think, I'm in
- 27:24for a workout here, because he'd always lecture
- 27:27me. And he says to me, Andy, and I think, how
- 27:31am I going to answer this question? He says,
- 27:34does the end justify the means? And I'm thinking,
- 27:38I don't know the answer. Yes? He says, no. No,
- 27:43Andy. Because every means, especially with people,
- 27:48is an end to itself. Never use people for another
- 27:55end. You can work with people, and if they consent
- 28:01to work with you, work with them to achieve another
- 28:04end. But never consider people a means to an
- 28:10end you have. And I think that's the key to when
- 28:14you're talking, communicating with people, the
- 28:16way to deal with it. Absolutely. Absolutely.
- 28:19I also feel that when you're beginning that communication,
- 28:26you're looking to bring value to the conversation.
- 28:32You're looking to bring value because if I, instead
- 28:35of it being transactional, before the pandemic,
- 28:39everything was transactional. After the pandemic,
- 28:42we've become more relationship oriented. And
- 28:46if I'm reaching out to you, I'm not going to
- 28:49reach out to you and say, oh, by the way, I have
- 28:51three widgets for a dollar. Would you like to
- 28:53buy them? I'm reaching out to you and I may cut
- 28:56an article out and say. I saw this article, would
- 29:00you be interested? So on and so forth. So I try
- 29:03to bring value to the conversation three, four,
- 29:06five times, and then I'll slowly hit you with
- 29:09my services. So that's a different way. How can
- 29:13professionals ensure their networking is mute?
- 29:17Wait a second. I just asked you that. Okay. Are
- 29:21there specific tools or platforms that immigrants
- 29:24or newcomers should leverage to accelerate their
- 29:28integration into new professional communities?
- 29:32Wow. I mentioned Toastmasters. I think that's
- 29:37an excellent organization to join to practice
- 29:40your speaking skills and learn leadership skills.
- 29:44I wasn't a member for a while. Yeah, there you
- 29:47go. And if you get good enough, you could join
- 29:50the National Speakers Association. So, for example,
- 29:53I see your speaker. Oh, you are. Okay, so that's
- 29:57definitely a place to hang out from your point
- 29:59of view if you're working in your area. Professional
- 30:02associations are also very handy. In my area,
- 30:06the American Immigration Lawyers Association,
- 30:09for example, is an organization I belong to.
- 30:12I think you've got to do things like that. All
- 30:15the service clubs, like Rotary. Kiwanis, optimists,
- 30:20and so on. I think they're great places to belong
- 30:24and to find meaningful activities, share experiences
- 30:28with the members. I've attended many Rotary meetings
- 30:33and so on, and I got a lot of value from Rotary.
- 30:37So those would be some of the areas that I would
- 30:39recommend. Of course, going to school and college
- 30:42and so on never hurts. And the more skills you
- 30:45can learn, the better. Yeah, I've... spoken to
- 30:49a great many rotaries, Lions Clubs, things like
- 30:53that, business associations, because I feel that
- 30:56they get the most out of what I have to say about
- 31:00networking, communication, everything else. Everything
- 31:03for me, networking is the baseline for every
- 31:08business. And you work up from there. Okay, so
- 31:13what advice would you give to someone who feels
- 31:16intimidated or unsure about reaching out to established
- 31:20professionals? I know in my case, I welcome if
- 31:26someone reaches out and asks, say, listen, I'm
- 31:29having a hardship. Would you be willing to spend
- 31:31a little time with me to see how I can get over
- 31:34this hardship or how can I become a lawyer or
- 31:38what am I missing or whatever as an immigrant?
- 31:42I think most people, especially accomplished
- 31:45people who are not egocentric, and I think most
- 31:51people, a lot of people, see the world as something
- 31:55bigger than just themselves. And such people
- 31:58are more than willing if you just reach out and
- 32:01ask for guidance or to consult with them. So
- 32:06I would recommend that, no matter how high up.
- 32:09you think they are in the world and how low you
- 32:12feel. But here's a little tip that I got from
- 32:16a friend of mine, Wally Patrician, who was a
- 32:18lawyer. He's passed on now, but he shared this
- 32:21tip with me, which is when he was practicing
- 32:24law and he didn't know what to do and got into
- 32:27an area, had no idea what to do about. He looked
- 32:31up in the directory, who are some of the top
- 32:34lawyers, attorneys in the field? He would call
- 32:38up the office and he'd book an appointment for
- 32:40a consultation and pay $400 or $500 more, $1
- 32:46,000 for an hour. And he'd go and see them and
- 32:51say, look, I'm a young lawyer. I'm just starting.
- 32:54I need to learn how to do mergers and acquisitions.
- 32:57You're the star in the area. Can you share with
- 33:01me what I need to know so that I can learn this
- 33:03field? And they would open up to him and help
- 33:07him. enormously, way over the whatever amount
- 33:10he paid. But it was a very clever way to do networking.
- 33:15Money's hard. People don't want to give money
- 33:18up. That's always the most difficult thing. I
- 33:21know about when I first started speaking, I reached
- 33:25out to a very well -known, highly respected speaker
- 33:30within the country. Everybody's always trying
- 33:34to get him and everything else. I reached out
- 33:36to him through LinkedIn, through an email. And
- 33:39I just, look, I'm going to give it a shot. If
- 33:41he answers me, that's wonderful. If not, I understand.
- 33:45And I reached out to him. I asked him two questions.
- 33:49And I think within an hour, he responded through
- 33:53his cell phone. But he responded. And I was like,
- 33:57little old me? He reached out to me? But yeah,
- 34:02because every time they're at it. It's not a
- 34:06big ask. They're willing to help you and extend
- 34:10their, I'll say their greatness, but it's amazing.
- 34:14All you have to do is ask. Never be afraid to
- 34:17ask. Yeah. Okay. So how do you measure the profitability
- 34:21of a connection? What makes a networking relationship
- 34:25truly valuable? I'll tell you from my practice,
- 34:32and I've been practicing for many decades. I
- 34:35learned that when I focus on the money, nothing
- 34:41seems to go right. When I focus on the person
- 34:45and the problem, the money takes care of itself.
- 34:50In fact, it's even better if I do that than if
- 34:54I focus on the money. I'll make more money focusing
- 34:57on the person and the problem. now i know there's
- 35:03a school of thought how much should i earn this
- 35:05year set a target and work towards it i don't
- 35:10know i'm not saying you shouldn't do that it's
- 35:13probably helpful but in my own experience the
- 35:18way i got ahead in life and the friendships and
- 35:22the colleagues that I made in my life, I made
- 35:26most of my advances and what I am thankful for
- 35:30because of the focus on the idea, the ideals,
- 35:35the person, the connection to the person, and
- 35:40like you said earlier, providing value in relationships.
- 35:44That's where I found the most reward came from.
- 35:49And not every reward is economic. Look, I had
- 35:53clients who'd come in and they couldn't afford
- 35:55to pay me. They're immigrants. So they'd bring
- 35:58me a jar of pickles or a dead chicken for dinner.
- 36:04I'd bring it home to my wife. She'd say, what
- 36:06are we going to do with this? Eat it. Go get
- 36:10it and eat it. There's all kinds of stuff like
- 36:12that. But it's memorable. It is. Yeah. I'm known
- 36:17in... this area as being a connector. I see two
- 36:22people that are in need of each other's services
- 36:24and they did not know of one another. I'm going
- 36:27to introduce them and then back away. I'm going
- 36:31to say, Andy, this is Michael. Michael, this
- 36:33is Andy. This is what Michael does. This is what
- 36:36Andy does. I think you can use one another. Have
- 36:39at it. I step away and I let them. Now, they
- 36:43usually include me on their email chains, so
- 36:45I know what's going on, but it's not necessary.
- 36:48And I try to do that once a week. So I've been
- 36:52doing it for two years now. So every week I put
- 36:56two people together and whatever comes out of
- 36:59it, it comes out. And that way that I feel I've
- 37:03done something. Yeah, yeah. Good work. Okay,
- 37:08now let's bring this podcast full circle. For
- 37:11women and minorities navigating new environments,
- 37:14what empowering mindset or habit has helped you
- 37:19overcome barriers to build an authentic relationship?
- 37:24Okay, I'm going to talk about motivation here.
- 37:28And this is a topic dear to me. and it's dear
- 37:33to me because i learned about it from one of
- 37:35the great speakers in toastmasters many years
- 37:39ago when i was in toastmasters i came up with
- 37:42an idea i learned that toastmasters each year
- 37:46had what they called a golden gavel speaker that
- 37:49would come to their convention and give them
- 37:52a talk about their life and they would award
- 37:55him the gold or her the golden gavel for the
- 37:58year So I wrote to Toastmasters magazine and
- 38:02I said to them, hey, listen, I'm a Toastmaster.
- 38:05I would be interested in hearing these Golden
- 38:08Gavel recordings and writing about them for Toastmasters
- 38:12magazines. And they sent me a whole bunch, a
- 38:15collection of these speeches. And among the speeches,
- 38:20there was a guy who won the Golden Gavel way
- 38:25back, probably about 40 years ago, maybe 30 years
- 38:28ago, whatever. And he talked about motivation.
- 38:35And I was really impressed. I really took it
- 38:39to heart. And he talked this way. His name was
- 38:42Bob Richards, a Golden Gobble winner. And he
- 38:48said, in the course of this talk, he said, when
- 38:51I was a small kid, I lived in a town and we had
- 38:55a baseball team. And the best baseball player
- 38:58on the team was a guy named Lou Boudreau. And
- 39:02everybody, all the kids like me when I was a
- 39:05kid, this is Bill, Bob Richards talking, admired
- 39:09Lou Boudreau. The sun set, rose and set on Lou
- 39:14Boudreau. And one day, Richards went to the baseball
- 39:19field and was in the stadium. in the far end
- 39:24of the stadium when Lou Boudreau hit a home run.
- 39:28And Richards caught the home run. And he was
- 39:32just ecstatic. He ran to the players' change
- 39:37area, waiting for the players to come out, so
- 39:40he could get the autograph of Lou Boudreau on
- 39:43the baseball. And he was standing there. Lou
- 39:46Boudreau came out. And he was going down the
- 39:49line. And he came to Richards. He says to Richards,
- 39:52and what's your name? And Richards said, Bobby.
- 39:56Bobby Richards. And Lou says to Bobby, oh, and
- 40:00what are you going to be when you grow up? And
- 40:03Richards, I think he said, I'm going to be a
- 40:05great baseball player. And Boudreau said, oh,
- 40:09that's great, Bobby. I can see it. One day you're
- 40:13going to be great. really great. And he took
- 40:16the ball and he signed Luke Woodrow. And Richards
- 40:21in this speech said, you can't imagine how motivating
- 40:27it was to hear some encouragement from a person
- 40:31like him who was so big in my life, such an idol
- 40:35for me in my life. And then he went on to talk
- 40:39a little bit more about motivation. And this
- 40:41is what he said. Back then, when he was speaking,
- 40:45America was in the skids, you know, economically
- 40:49in trouble. And a newspaper decided to canvas
- 40:54some of the leading economists in America, asking,
- 40:58what does America need right at this moment to
- 41:01get out of the economic malaise? And three economists
- 41:06all answered the same thing. They said, what's
- 41:09needed is motivation. And then Richards said,
- 41:15this is how I define motivation. He says, motivation
- 41:21is painting a picture of the life of the person
- 41:29you're dealing with that's bigger than the image
- 41:34that he or she has for themselves at that moment.
- 41:39And the moment of motivation, is when that person
- 41:44clutches onto that bigger image for themselves
- 41:47and adopts it in their life. And I thought, wow,
- 41:53that to me explains everything. Yes, it does.
- 42:00Yes, it does. Andy, I got to tell you, I'm out
- 42:03of questions, but I can probably talk to you
- 42:05for another two hours. Time is limiting. If anybody
- 42:11wanted to get hold of you for a discussion, for
- 42:14some consulting, to hire you, whatever the case
- 42:17may be, what's the best way for them to get hold
- 42:19of you? Okay. I work with a group called Pace
- 42:23Law Firm, P -A -C -E Law Firm. And our website
- 42:27is pacelawfirm .com. So you can just go to the
- 42:31website and you'll find my name and you can get
- 42:34all my contact information. anything about my
- 42:36books or what I'm doing there. That would be
- 42:40the best way. Great. Andy, thank you so much.
- 42:44You were so insightful. And with the stories
- 42:47and everything else, I can't thank you enough
- 42:50for coming on my podcast. I enjoyed it immensely.
- 42:53Thank you, Michael. Well. Hold on, folks. Don't
- 43:05go anywhere. Let's hear from our sponsors. David
- 43:08Neal, co -founder Revved Up Kids. Revved Up Kids
- 43:12is on a mission to protect children and teens
- 43:15from sexual abuse, exploitation, and trafficking.
- 43:19They provide prevention training programs for
- 43:22children, teens, and adults. To learn more, go
- 43:26to revvedupkids .org. Henry Kaplan, Century 21.
- 43:31When it comes to making the biggest financial
- 43:33decision of your life, leave it in the hands
- 43:36of a proven professional, Henry Kaplan. Henry
- 43:39is a global real estate agent with Century 21,
- 43:42celebrating his 41st year in business. No matter
- 43:46where you're moving, Henry has the right connections
- 43:49for you. You can contact Henry at 561 -427 -4888.
- 44:02A huge thank you to our guests for sharing such
- 44:05incredible insights today. And of course, a big
- 44:08shout out to you, our amazing listeners, for
- 44:11tuning in and spending your time with us. If
- 44:14you're interested in my digital courses, being
- 44:17coached, or having me come and talk to your company,
- 44:20just go to Michael and fill out the request form.
- 44:24Remember, networking isn't about being perfect.
- 44:27It's about being present. So take what you've
- 44:30learned today. get out there, and make some meaningful
- 44:33connections. If you've enjoyed this episode,
- 44:36please don't forget to subscribe, leave us a
- 44:39review, and share it with someone who could use
- 44:42a little networking inspiration. Let's keep the
- 44:45conversation going. You can find me on Apple,
- 44:48Spotify, Pandora, YouTube, or my website, foreman
- 44:53.com slash podcasts.