Latest / Blind But Now I See / BBNIC S3 Episode 30 - Parenting! How Hard Can It Be??

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BBNIC S3 Episode 30 - Parenting! How Hard Can It Be?? · Blind But Now I See

0:00
Back at it for another week of the Black Podcast. I am your host,
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FOBC know the Hood, Ray Charles, Blonde Poppy if you nasty,
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the voice of the Disabls, Blind Lightning, the official Blonde Stepper, and
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we locked in with Frenchie. You know, I'm hoting me back for another
0:26
episode. Whoa we got woof in the studio. We locked in each and
0:31
every blad official producer. More works merch coming soon, like subscribe comment,
0:38
let's run up these numbers. I'm back, y'all, say y'all miss me.
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Now, I'm back. We're here. But this episode we're gonna talk
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about being a parent and being disabled, like the challenges we face. We
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make the ship look easy, but we go through a lot of ship.
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So you want to start it off? I mean yeah, I mean I
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guess, oh of course whatever. Ladies, First, you don't put me
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on a spot. Okay. So I was injured in twenty eleven due to
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a gun shot. I became paraplegic. You know, obviously there's different levels
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to it. I could feel my vagina, I was fucking I made a
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baby, and yeah I had a sign. I pushed him out naturally,
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like my pregnancy was amazing, you know what I mean, Like my stomach,
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I stayed small, Like my stomach just grew a little bit. He
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was in my back. I had a healthy like everything was just good.
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I didn't barely have morning segments. It was so easy. And he was
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just like my little best friend in my belly, you know. And I
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knew I was having a boy, but that's good that you experienced it.
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Like I was so happy because I was the first question I asked when I
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got shot. When I woke up, I thought I had to get pregnant
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the next day, I promise you, I swear of got told my mother.
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I remember the conversation in the hospital because I asked the doctor. I
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was like, it was when I got to rehibe. I asked, because
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when I was for the first two weeks, it's just hailing. And if
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you got shot and you're back, then you know, like I had a
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bunch of broken bones, My ribcage was broken. I barey could breathe and
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stuff. So I wasn't asking questions a boy, no fucking baby. So
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I wasn't thinking so now that like you know, the drugs, I'm off
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the drugs and stuff because I thugged my shit out, been off them pills
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and stuff like that. After I got out the er and stuff. But
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so I started asking questions. I was like, hey, can I have
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a kid? You know? And she was like, of course, she
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said, nothing down there was damaged. They cut me open and checked for
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internal bleeding, but everything was fine, everything was in place, everything was
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good, and my puom poom still works. So it's like she's like,
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yeah, of course you're good. So I'm like, okay, good.
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So I was fifteen at the time, so I told my mother I have
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to look my mother will have a baby. And my mother just was so
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happy I was alive, you know what I mean she did. She was
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just like no, she was like okay, whatever, you know what I
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mean. She's just listening to me cause she's just so happy. I didn't
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have that conversation with my dad. He probably wud have knocked me out the
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chair, but I said, Mommy, I just got to do it.
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She's like, okay, you know, you know, I'll hope you and
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stuff. But she's not really paying me no mine. She just want to
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feed my dreams and stuff. And then I had ended up getting pregnant my
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first time at seventeen, and I chose to, you know, abort it.
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But because I was like, hey, god, you serious, niggas,
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are you serious? And I got righted on birth controls. I know
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you could do it. I was like, yeah, know, I could
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do it. Let me get rid of it. And then one more because
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after you know, I was on birth control each time. But when I
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had my son, I knew I wanted him because a lot of people would
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think, like, oh, you're in wheel chair, so you just cap
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your first baby. It wasn't hard. It's very easy to get pregnant sitting
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down to stand up. I think the sperm hit you quicker. It's like
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true. But my father, he was just busting every day. He was
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just going at it, like going to pound town like we literally me way,
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father fucked in every place, every in every position. If we was
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ever at your house, we did it then like we was violent. So
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we knew he was going to have a baby. We planned him. I
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took out my birth and stroll in June. I found that I was pregnant
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in September. I was six weeks And it's crazy because from the moment that
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I found out, it was just like he was happy. I was happy.
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We was smiling like a motherfucker. We planned him down to the tea
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because me and my son's father we're both geminis, so we both wanted a
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Gemini child. So my son was supposed to be doing May thirtieth, but
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I begged them to induce me because that motherfucker was getting too big. I
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thought he was about to break my life. And that's the only thing about
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being pregnant wheelchair for women that don't know, because I feel like, you
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know, just to be informative. Your bladder like it's like you're sitting down
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already and then something's pushing on you, you know what I'm saying. So
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it's like I had to literally I kept a bed paying by the side of
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my bed, and I just peeing all the time. And then I started
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wearing diapers because I'm like, fuck this, Like once you get too big,
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you're like, yeah, I'm not doing this. But other than that,
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I had no complications. Everything went good. I pushed him out,
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easy delivery, everything went smooth, no problems. And that's my dog,
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what my baby, that's my dog. He don't see no wheelchair. He
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because he because he's been born into this like it's just regular to him.
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But you know he's getting older now, he's started and just he's so smart
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and he'll say like, Mommy, don't roll so fast because then you're gonna
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fall out you wheelchair. Everybody gonna laugh at you. Like he'll say shit
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like that and you'll be like, what the fuck did you just say?
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And he is his father's shoud so he'd be saying funny shit like if he
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mad. If I tell him to do something, he'll come and he'll take
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my chair and like no, like that, I'm gonna beat your ass.
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I'm like no. I was like, give him my chair and he's like
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he's like no, so he'll take this ship or something. But it's funny
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because it's like you little ass. Yeah, it's a comfortability, like he's
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he's literally like everything. He since he was two, he's been pushing my
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chair and when he was a baby, he used to get in the chair
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and be like it's cool to him. You know, when I bought this
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book is a book for children, I forgot what it's cool. But it's
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on Amazon and we'll put it in the bio. But it's like it's it's
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like it was a kid, his mother was in a wheelchair, but he
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imagined his mother's wheelchairs being everything but a wheelchair. So he imagined it is
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like a ship, like a ship, like a you know, on a
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boat, a rocket ship, sac all different types of shit, but a
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wheelchair. Yeah. So I feel like that's how my son sees me and
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my son every time you see me, he be like, you're so beautiful
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mommy, Like he never says anything crazy about my chair. So me your
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son before years? Yeah, So what was that like? Because I feel
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like there's a difference because I have my son in it, Like I had
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my son. When I had my son, I was twenty one years old,
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two and eleven. But then didn't you get shot? Got shot twenty
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twelve? You got his first birth Well, I got shot in twenty eleven,
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back to bad after his first birthday, after his birthday, so like
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is directly after two months later. So you were he was born in what
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month? He's born in three months, he's born in Janeavery tenth, and
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you got shot in what April? April April twenty first, So what was
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that like though? So it was like it was a big difference because it's
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like I I didn't have my father growing up in my life. Okay,
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so in my mind, I got a boy first shot. No, girl,
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got a boy. Oh, we're gonna do this. We're gonna do
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that. We're gonna play basketball. You already got that all mapped out and
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set like a high life, gonna be for y'all. Right, then when
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I got shot, it was like, damn, the shit slowed me down.
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Now I can't see him. It's like trying to It's like playing guess
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who, cause you can't see what's from on with him? Right like you
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got to go and feelings an emotion. You felt his face, No,
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I definitely felt his Gotta make sure my maybe not getting ugly now, I
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definitely felt his face. It's just like just like, damn, stop growing.
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It's just and it's like the height and it stopped growing because I've seen
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him. It's a grown ass mag getting out the car. I ain't know
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what the hell is it half his days because it's days like playing basketball.
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The ways slow down so down. So when you first, because you've seen
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your son before, So that's the beauty of it. No, it's not,
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you don't. It's good because you got to see him before I got
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to see him. But then it's like, I'm sure because it's like you
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feel like it because it feel like it took it. It took like you
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feel like it would have been easy if you never got to So I was
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cut short with us, not short because I'm physically him, but just to
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see him grow up in front of me. You wanted to jenuine, that's
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the one person you want to see, like if you could see anybody be
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He got dreads now, he's very handsome, dreads like the way he like.
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I just be in the house and I just listen to him talk.
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You buy sneakers on Saturday. He went to school one day. He already
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got it. No uniform, no nothing, Bro, Damn you to a
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uniform school, bro. But he put on that tech. It's like my
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baby, not a baby no more so do you feel like did you ever
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have a conversation with your sign about how he feels about like you being man?
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I'm the best him, I asked her. I said, yeah,
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you don't feel No, Nah, he don't care. It's nothing because he's
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been like this his whole life. That's my dog, me and him together
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and he got my ways, got my ways the way he talked his mother.
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He say sarcastic shit. I say, yeah, that's my boy.
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You just hear it. That's my boy. Like he he's not letting nobody
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play a protector like I talked to somebody staying in front of me. So
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like, was there ever a moment that like a part of his life?
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Like let's because I feel like everybody, especially when you have a child with
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a disability, it's always a moment and a child's like where you break down
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because it's like you wish you could have you didn't have your disability so that
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you could have been enjoying. What moment was that for you? That basketball
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court? Him he plays basketball and you can't see, but I feel like
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if I could see, it had been a different ball game. When it
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comes to pushing basketball, he'd take it serious more. I said, it
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just it's just a playing thing. Did you used to play basketball? So
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you're trying to push that? You know a lot of fathers do that.
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They try to push you know, they're No, it wasn't even that.
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It's like he came he wanted to join the basketball team. I'm like,
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all right, first time I ever put myself on the streets, was him,
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So hit me with that. I got practice today. I got tryouts,
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So you got tryouts. I'm saying, how the fun are you gonna
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get there? Okay, so how did you? I said, you trust
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me to go outside with me? He said? Yeah? How old was
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he was in public school at this time? Fourth grade? So it's just
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that fourth grade. Yeah. So I said, all right, bro,
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don't get us hit by no cars? Oh ship? So yeah, okay,
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Oh we walk in. He's stopping. He looking alright, We good.
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We walking, We're stopping, look both ways, Alrea, we good.
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Now we get on the bus. I said. I know he's not
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familiar with the streets. I said, Yo, just look out the windown
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till you see your school, see the school. Hit that thing alright?
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All for you? You know, you kill me because you know there's so
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much technology that help you do this. Ship. You just don't want to
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do it. He's like, I'm not participating none of this. Blind A
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bunch of blond people outside by themselves. I don't know them, but I
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see them, you know what I'm saying, and they I'm gonna start you
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just like I'm gonna act my I'm at my disability this year, it's nothing
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wrong with it, like when we need the help, accept it, you
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know what I'm saying. And that's the problem with a lot of people with
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disabilities. And we have children and they're able to help us now, thank
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God. But it's like before, and it's like it's like before then,
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It's like you could have pushed out. You could have pushed out twenty blocks
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away from the dam basketball game. I gotta tell people, like the stick
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is not like I'm not scared of the stick. I'm scared stuff and ship
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I'll be. I'll be scared of rolling ship be so much shit on this
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New York City blocks. Please put your dogs twelves half ship on yo.
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God, and everybody got the little bulldogs now so they think it's expensive ship
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or something. Pick it up, Jesus Christ, how much you pay?
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Like, come on, he can't see and I can't walk. I don't
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want to roll on it in a staircase in the elevator. Stop it,
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please, Jesus making it and people tracking that ship in their cribs, that
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step of ship. I'm even my sneakers wee is at I'm walking home with
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my socks. So how did it go when you got to the game,
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like they're here and there he playing, he's shooting, but it's like you
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can't see it. So that sh was fucking me out for a minute.
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But it's like I gotta stay strong for him. You can't show any side.
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I'm in the car, I'm in the corner. They called me,
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like you good. I'm like, I'm good, bro. It was just
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ya to me. It's just me and him, nobody just me. So
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they shooting around. Then he shot it. He can't. Oh I made
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it you the night? Did you hear that? I'm like, yeah,
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I heard it. He went back to doing it and it ain't and that
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like that's when I realized, like, yo, he's he's smart for his
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age because it ain't. Did you see me make it stopped another way?
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Did you have so? Oh my? That was swiss? You heard the
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next We play each other like we we play fight with each other. We
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do mad mad different ship Like that's Malcolm X right there. Because it's like
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my son knows when it comes to me, it's like I'm one of them
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cool parents. I ain't on your back. I asked good grades because you
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were young. He was a young dad. Good grades. Been on the
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honor road since he was in second grade period And just like you don't want
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him to be in the streets. How you don't want him to be in
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the street. I can tell be on his back about a little word ship
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because I tell him, like they don't love me like I love you.
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I'm telling you when I tell you something, I ain't doing it to hurt
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you. Like his school called, oh, he threw milk on the store.
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What the store? He threw milk on the store? Yeah? Window.
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I'm like, I'm gonna suck him up when he comes home. He
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comes home, I'm bad, I says, I, man with you,
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Dad, I threw milk on the store. Wow, they're racist? And
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that was my favorite line. I'm laughing. I'm like, I'm trying to
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keep it together, he said, And I don't like racist people. I'm
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like, Bro, you don't have to. But I bought the milk before
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I throw it. Bro, So you're wasting my money. Yeah, like
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you outside spending my money and you're gonna throw something. But then I had
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to like I laughed. But then I told him, like you, bro,
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this is the world we live in. You got to learn how to
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navigate and move through that ship, bro without taking So it's like, but
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so that's the thing too when a lot of people, because a lot of
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people when you have a disability, a sleep on your parents, I feel
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like that's the most offensive part. The definitely do when someone doesn't think I'm
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capable. As I said in the previous podcast that we just did, I
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said, at you know, somebody will grab my child, like if I'm
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crossing the street, they automatically assume like it's no way in hell. My
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son know, Like he's so smart. I feel like he had some mature
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faster because of this situation. Do you understand I'm saying like he's always been
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ahead of his time, Like he literally like if it's something on top of
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the fridge, because I could reach my arms along thankfully, and I sit
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up. I'm told naturally, so I set up pretty high and he'll climb
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up. I didn't know my baby because of this. But we've been in
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my owner. We've been living on our own, just me and him.
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Yes, people that are disabled with their children alone. I got my own.
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Shit. We've been on our own since he's too he's about to be
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five now. And he pulled the chair from the table to the counter,
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clamped on a chair, clamped on the counter, to get on top of
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the fridge, to get his own stuff from two years from two years old,
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to do that. You know what I'm saying, Like certain things,
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anything that I can reach or do, he knows how to do it.
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Like he knows how to He helps me take out trash and stuff. Like
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he calls himself the little man in the house. He was like, Mommy
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the other day he said, yeah, mommy, I make oord of rules.
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You follow myself. While you said that, he said, because I'm
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the only he said, I'm the only man in the house. I said,
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who the hell he talks about? He's so smart, and it's like
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he doesn't see the disability. So when people are outside, like I remember
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a lot. I remember one time because I used to I used to get
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sad and offended when people would just you know, come up to me and
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just like, oh I got you no, like I used to get offendive.
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But my son he was like, I got it. Don't touch me
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like and he knows like strange and danger like he knows. We don't have
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accidents in the street. We don't have none of that. So it's just
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like I know I'm doing what I'm supposed to. As long as you have
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a mind, you could raise a child. Because I know people without any
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limbs, I know people without any legs. I know people that can't see.
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I know people that are death that do a better job of parents than
15:33
people without disabilities, because there's a lot of people. There's people with no
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disabilities that are terrible parents their children exactly. Their children have a lot you
15:43
know, that need them and they don't do anything for them. So I
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don't I don't feel bad about being appaired to the chair. There are times
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where I do. Like I said, I've had situations just like how you
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talking about like for one example, Yeah, I was just about that,
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what's your hardest broken the hardest moments, because it's I just want to do
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certain things with my son, like certain activities like that you have to walk
16:07
for because we go everywhere, Me and my baby go everywhere by ourselves.
16:08
We don't been on the plane by ourselves, we don't travel, you know
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what I mean. And it was lit because I was always scared, you
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know, like for every first time we do something, you get nervous because
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it's like, all right, how is this gonna work? So our first
16:18
time taking a plane, but then it was so natural and he's so used
16:22
to mean and ch he be like you good mommy, you need something you
16:25
do you know what I mean? And then it's other people that accommodate you.
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And that's what I said earlier. We got to use the help,
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you know what I mean. Like when you get to that airport and you
16:32
want to do thoughts by yourself, you got to be able to say,
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all right, you know he I got him and stuff like that, but
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I'm gonna need a little assistance. I need somebody to carry out a luggage.
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Oh now I get the wheelchair, you know, the baby out.
16:42
Oh you'll be lucky with oll girls don't got them them bbl holes, always
16:45
sitting with the ass put there. I'm like, can I get one?
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Were running out of god dea wheelchairs, but just want to stick shit in
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your ass? Push me, push me through. Baby, I'm sitting there,
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Call me, I don't, I don't mind, and they give me
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the other little chair. But you know they up chairs do better with the
17:00
chairs. But get the line. Thank God for that. My hardest moment
17:04
with my son, like I said, I've said it before. It was
17:07
just we went to an amusement park and well, no, I have to
17:11
take that away now because I went to Corneyolo with him this summer and I
17:14
got on the rods with him and it was like, because I was always
17:17
I was like, how then do it? But it's like most of the
17:18
rocks that Corney Island are accessible, and he was just so happy. He
17:22
was like, look, mommy, you rode feel like he was more hype
17:25
for me. So I want that little kid that ass roller coaster happy as
17:27
fuck like we because I was just able to do it. Oh yeah,
17:32
my son, he's everything. And I just was like, you know,
17:33
and people were looking like people were clapping, is you know what I mean?
17:37
Like it's it's like, wow, she's still doing it. And a
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lot of people come up to me like, yo, you're doing your thing.
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You're a good mom. Like that's my favorite compliment because even in a
17:44
wheelchair, Like like I said, I know some deadbeat mothers. You know
17:48
what I'm saying, I do my I do my thing. I take my
17:52
son to school every morning, you know, I take him and pick him
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up bomb myself, you know what I mean? His haircuts, everything,
17:57
bond myself, doctor's appoint miss by myself, anything he needed by myself.
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Like I said, we travel, we go to amusement parts, we go
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to play places, we go to everything. I just got to make sure
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it successful. But being that, everything that I can do, he knows.
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But you know what I mean, he knows how to maneuver. He
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knows never go too far. He knows always stay in my vision. He
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knows to stay in my reach. Like I don't worry when I'm outside with
18:17
him because I know he's good. People always think, oh, you outside
18:19
with him by yourself, to the dubbage. I had him. I had
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him and his father. Don't ever worry when he always like I know he
18:27
good when you know what I mean, Like his father, don't worry when
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he with me, Like you get my mother. Everybody know like you got
18:33
my daughter good? You know what they mean having to say it. But
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I'm gonna do a little bit of reals to show y'all how it goes.
18:37
I don't push my son's stroller carrying my lap. All the fears that people
18:42
would expect from me, I feel like my fears came from people trying to
18:45
instill them on me, you know what I'm saying, like trying to project
18:48
what they thought and how hard it was gonna be for me. And it
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wasn't because my dad he was like, but he was like a little scared
18:53
for me. And at first he and he told me the other day he
18:56
was like, Yo, you an amazing mom. You know what I mean?
18:59
And that shit almost mainly come to tea because it's like he was like,
19:03
you know, at first sat it. I was a little scared,
19:04
you know, I didn't know how he was going to do it. But
19:06
he was like, you're an amazing mother. But when people say you're amazing
19:08
mother, do that makes you fit? Like, because like my mom always
19:11
telling me, are you amazing? Dad? You are here and look what
19:15
you're doing. But I still feel like it's not enough though. I feel
19:18
like it's not enough because I'm not rich. I don't feel like it's anything
19:19
with the chair. I feel like I want to just be able to get
19:22
the richest, like certain moments I want with myself, like oh, like
19:25
as far as being able to, I mean, it's always gonna it's always
19:29
like gonna be certain things. It's gonna be certain things that I want to
19:32
do with my child, like I like certain like so now if we,
19:36
for example, for his birthday, I wanted to just go to Florida and
19:38
go to these amusement pers and stuff. But like what a person is certain
19:41
right, he's little, so he can't get on stuff himself. So it's
19:42
like she like that I would have to break somebody else, so that she
19:45
like that pisses me off because I don't like depending on other people's And then
19:49
when you want other people to come and it's like they want you to pay
19:52
for them and stuff like that and do shit like that, and it's like
19:55
damn. But I wanted to just go with my kid, but I know
19:56
he's gonna need assistance because they're not going let him just get on and then
20:00
this stuff, I could just do him because I didn't got on the water.
20:03
I got on lazy rivers and stuff like that. But all these water
20:06
slides got steers and ship you know what I mean. They gotta comme.
20:08
So he needs somebody there, and I'm happy I do have a whole support
20:11
So something like I said, my mother golded Like my mother, I could
20:15
call my mother for anything, but she got our own kids. You know.
20:18
My mother had me young and my mother had me younger. She got
20:19
other younger. My siblings are younger than me thirteen, you know, twelve,
20:22
ten years younger than me, so she got to be with them too.
20:26
So it's like I have to also take that into accountability. And then
20:30
he got his father. But his father, you know, he work and
20:33
he got his own shit going on, like so it's like you gotta really
20:34
try to maneuver. Yeah, my heart, my hardest moment was my son
20:38
graduation. Kid, you couldn't see it. I can't see it. Broke
20:41
me down, broke me down. I was dragging my feeling there. Why
20:45
are you dragging? Like am I dragging? Ain't like? Yes, you
20:49
why you're not dressed yet? I wasn't preparing and you didn't want to make
20:53
it about you. Yes, it's like you know, if you didn't show
20:56
up, it would have hurt him. But it's just like you felt like
20:59
what the point because I can't even see this sitting sitting down. It was
21:03
like I cried all the day graduation, but this public school went going to
21:07
junior high school? It was different. Is he there? He getting the
21:11
wall at the wall and I'm sitting up there it's like call his name to
21:14
walk across that stage, dropped my head. His godfather was like, come
21:18
on, man, put you pick your head up. Man, look what
21:19
you did? You deserve this. I'm like, yo, bro, I
21:22
just wish I could see it. Then he reading a poem his his speech
21:27
and he like, I couldn't do it out on my phone. And I'm
21:29
just sitting up there like, look, bro, you wouldn't have been headed
21:32
the witness this. Bro, I'm like, but it's nothing like to see
21:36
that across that stage, to see and that's and that's honestly, that's a
21:38
that's a good part about it. And being vulnerable. I feel like a
21:41
lot of people aren't vulnerable with their truth. Anybody this that the thirdy that
21:45
takes my son bring me to ta that takes a lot to us. It's
21:49
like he called me I can come home. I'm like, fuck because it's
21:56
like we're living in the where we living got grown up as people robbing kids,
22:00
hurting kids, and you feel like you might And it's like if my
22:04
son to call me and say somewhere, I can't just get up and run
22:07
outside and come to him like I would if I could see you're still gonna
22:11
go. But it's not I'm gonna go're not gonna be. I get what
22:15
you're saying, I'm gonna die for mine. Be I be feeling like I
22:18
be feeling like that, like because it's like, but I got a boy,
22:19
you know, so I'm like, I know he gonna get into you
22:22
know, it's just inevitable in certain situations, like I'm raising him and I
22:26
want to get him out the hood so that he don't have to deal with
22:29
situation. But whether in the hood or not, you know, there's bad
22:32
kids. It's always something. So it's just like I was always thinking,
22:34
like, damn, what happened today with somebody trying to jump my baby?
22:37
Where to my mother that tullly is coming out y'all jumped my son. I'm
22:45
out there swinging my stick. I'm fucking somebody. But one thing about you
22:49
know, but one thing about it, and I'm pretty sure is Mama not
22:52
gonna play about him. You get him saying, and my my baby daddy
22:56
not gonna playboy. He coming outside. You know, my baby mama,
22:59
she didn't nice one Like I'm the crazy I'm the crazy parent. I'm the
23:03
crazy parents. I go up to the school. They be like, I
23:04
mean, I'll be in three k while and I said, so you said
23:07
what? He said, what? Who did what to you? I don't
23:11
play about mom. I don't and I be a little kid, get your
23:15
mom. I don't play that. I don't play that eighth the eighty.
23:18
I will fuck you up. No, I tell him. I tell him,
23:21
if you could Carol, you could brow you understand what I'm saying.
23:22
And we both gonna act say I'm a retarded I'm gonna get to user this
23:26
disability a little differently. I ain't gonna it's like that's my product enjoy.
23:30
So it's like my mother. I'll go to his school. He yo,
23:37
he called, says I will be there tomorrow. I walked in the security
23:41
guard looking. He can't now they're trying to change the story. I said,
23:45
miss death flying kids live. I said, death fly too. Since
23:48
I can tell me what happened. He sat there. I set up bro
23:52
I'm here. He started telling it all. She said, but if you
23:55
felt like that, then I apologize. I said, you can't call nobody
23:57
stupid. You called him STUPI ah, you acting she so oh? I
24:00
said, you acting stupid. He said, no, you're did not.
24:03
So they looking like how he talking like this to a doubt. I said
24:07
that you gotta respect him to get respect, I said. His mother sent
24:11
up there, I said, because his father don't give a fuck. I
24:15
got everything to lose when they come to him, I don't give a fuck.
24:18
H I apologize, Dad, You accept my apology. It ain't me.
24:22
Do he accept your apology? You accept it? He still want to
24:26
go at it, I says, I mean it's over, bro, it's
24:29
over. He would not don't lie? He like, don't lie with my
24:32
father right here now, don't lie. I'm like, as I man,
24:36
his mother looking at me like, you ain't gonna say nothing. No,
24:37
I'm not gonna say nothing because one thing, if you know you right,
24:41
they could definish it to the end. You'll never let nobody shut your truthful.
24:45
Yeah, like I said, my son, he don't I remember because
24:48
he's at the school. You know, kids they see you will chairs.
24:51
But you know kids are innocent, you know what I mean. They ask
24:52
questions, they're curious and in my son. He don't play about me though,
24:56
same way I don't play. He don't same way I don't play about
24:59
him. He don't play by me. He'd be like, stop looking at
25:03
my mom like, he don't play that shit. It's my mommy like,
25:06
and then they'd be like, oh, we do you know what I mean?
25:07
Because he's only he's like and he's a little three four year old boy
25:11
defending his mother. And I see it and I'm just like wow, Like
25:14
my son is really gonna protect He's not gonna play about me. And it's
25:17
like, you know, I don't get in a way because I know God
25:21
and I know no weapon formed against me shall prosperous. So my son is
25:23
a part of me, you know what I mean. He's a direct vessel
25:26
in me. So I don't fear anything for him because when I trust him
25:29
outside in this world, I know that he's good and I know that if
25:30
I had to suffer again, go through this whole situation again so that my
25:34
son could be okay. I always tell God, like you know what,
25:37
I'm okay, And like I said, our situations is different because you had
25:41
your son before your disability. I had my son in it, and I
25:44
would have never had him if it wasn't for it, because I would have
25:45
never met his dad if I wasn't in this share. You do know what
25:48
I'm saying, So I don't take it back like it's hard. This is
25:52
always gonna be those moments where it's like, damn, I just want to
25:55
do this with my baby by myself. But I'd rather him still have me
25:57
here because we both could have been going built like this, We both could
26:00
have been going you the same. I'm saying. It's not on you,
26:03
it's in you. You feel me. So at the end of the day,
26:06
it don't take it. Don't take you being able body. It don't
26:08
take you having your sight to be a good parent. It takes you having
26:11
a good heart and a good mind and a good hed on your shoulders.
26:15
And we're raising kings out here, big fact. That's it. So you
26:18
know how we gonna end this. There's no excuse for dead bee parents.
26:22
That's it. We walking with steaks, we riding wheelchairs, and we still
26:26
making it happen for our kings and queens out here. So cut the bullshit,
26:30
cut the excuses, and be a better parent. Your disability shouldn't take
26:33
away from your ability to be a parent. Dead beat's got disabilities, That's
26:37
how I look at that. Yeah, you retarded because kids are beautiful and
26:41
in the future, and stop raising them to think that they not. Y'all
26:44
motherfuckers wanted to sit there and be the baby so bad. Tell your kings
26:48
they kings and queens. Every chance you get, shot with them with love
26:51
so when they hit the streets they're not looking for that bullshit love. And
26:56
stop feeling bad for us. We got kids to be happy and we wanted
26:59
them. Feel bad for yourself, but we out though. It was definitely
27:06
well. The French yall appreciated thanks well, I appreciate you, and you're
27:11
seeing you next and next week. That's that. Don Holiore still talking.
27:17
He was at the club of one night and I'm about to go to my
27:18
one myself. Uh huh. Easy,