Latest / Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families / #159 Planning a Christmas Stay-Cation

Transcript

#159 Planning a Christmas Stay-Cation · Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families

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  Speaker 1: We're about creating memories, and you don't do that in
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  Speaker 1: the lound room.
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  Speaker 2: Usually it's the Happy Families podcast.
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  Speaker 1: It's the podcast for the time poor parent who just
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  Speaker 1: wants answers.
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  Speaker 3: Now.
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  Speaker 4: Hello, this is doctor Justin Colson, the author of six
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  Speaker 4: books about raising happy families, and I'm here with my
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  Speaker 4: wife Kylie, missus Happy Families, the mum to our six daughters,
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  Speaker 4: one of whom I don't know if I've told you
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  Speaker 4: this or not yet. I caught last night in her
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  Speaker 4: bedroom on her phone well after lights out, facetiming a boy.
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  Speaker 1: Is that, like, I don't know the seven deadly sins
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  Speaker 1: in our.
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  Speaker 2: Broken every rule? She is not allowed to do that.
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  Speaker 2: Do you want to join me for the conversation this afternoon?
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  Speaker 2: I really could do its moral support.
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  Speaker 1: Yeah, I think I'm going to leave that one to
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  Speaker 1: the expert.
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  Speaker 4: So anyone who sends his an emails, it's all your
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  Speaker 4: family's so perfect. There it is the evidence that no,
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  Speaker 4: they're not not looking forward to this conversation one little bit.
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  Speaker 4: But we'll go somewhere nice. We'll make sure that we're
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  Speaker 4: in a public place. Treat her or to an ice
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  Speaker 4: cream or a milkshake or something like that, and I'll say, oh,
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  Speaker 4: by the way, we need to we need to do
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  Speaker 4: some exploring, explaining and some empowering around making the right
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  Speaker 4: choices in the evening with boys on telephones.
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  Speaker 1: If there's some ice cream, maybe I can join.
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  Speaker 2: You right easily, swayed.
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  Speaker 4: Hey, I want to talk about some feedback that we
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  Speaker 4: got via podcasts at happy families dot com dot U.
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  Speaker 4: That's podcasts with an s podcasts at happy families dot
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  Speaker 4: com dot AU. Somebody wrote to us and said, I
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  Speaker 4: really loved listening to you talking about holidays with the
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  Speaker 4: kids and how horrible they are. But we talked about
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  Speaker 4: how we plan our holidays and they wanted to know
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  Speaker 4: more about that. We talked about a trip that we
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  Speaker 4: had from Woollongong where we lived, to Brisbane to stay
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  Speaker 4: at your parents, because, let's face it, we've spent the
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  Speaker 4: last twenty years, except in the last couple of years,
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  Speaker 4: staying with relatives when we've holiday because we haven't had
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  Speaker 4: the money. We've holidayed on a shoe string budget, sleeping
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  Speaker 4: on couches and sofa beds.
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  Speaker 1: Yeah, and I don't know about you, but holiday in
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  Speaker 1: somebody else's house, sharing their space doesn't always feel like
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  Speaker 1: a holiday, it's a little bit stifling at times.
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  Speaker 2: Yeah, not that we're not that we're ungrateful.
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  Speaker 4: I mean we've been able to get away from home
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  Speaker 4: and do something, but it's it's not exactly the most
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  Speaker 4: relaxing way to holiday, right, No.
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  Speaker 1: But one of the things that we've done is in
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  Speaker 1: order to kind of, I guess, smooth things over and
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  Speaker 1: make it more comfortable for everyone, because nobody likes being,
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  Speaker 1: you know, kind of in each other's space. Twenty four
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  Speaker 1: seven is creating a plan of activities that we can
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  Speaker 1: do with our children that kind of get everybody out
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  Speaker 1: and about and we include, you know, the extent of
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  Speaker 1: family if they want to join us or is it
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  Speaker 1: just our family goes off and does some things.
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  Speaker 4: Yeah, so that there's not two or three families combined
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  Speaker 4: in the living room to have this catch up on holidays.
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  Speaker 1: Yeah, we're about creating memories and you don't do that
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  Speaker 1: in the laundroom usually. So we've really really enjoyed finding
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  Speaker 1: ways to kind of explore the surroundings and our trip
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  Speaker 1: to Brisbane was definitely one that we've remembered.
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  Speaker 4: Yeah, So the feedback was basically, how do you plan
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  Speaker 4: one of those holidays. So in a nutshell, what happened
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  Speaker 4: was we stayed with your parents, but every single day
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  Speaker 4: we were out and about doing things that were low
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  Speaker 4: cost or no cost.
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  Speaker 1: So one of the things that I tried to do
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  Speaker 1: was kind of create, you know, a mind map of
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  Speaker 1: the energy that was required for each activity. Because we
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  Speaker 1: had young children, so I wanted to make sure that
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  Speaker 1: if we did a high impact, high energy required activity,
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  Speaker 1: that we had a rest day where we did something
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  Speaker 1: that was low key or didn't cost as much because
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  Speaker 1: the day before did. So all of those kinds of
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  Speaker 1: things came into my thought process. So there's a couple
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  Speaker 1: of things that I could probably share with everybody that
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  Speaker 1: might help them if they're struggling to work out what
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  Speaker 1: to do with their station.
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  Speaker 4: Yeah, well because COVID, right, I mean, a lot of
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  Speaker 4: people are not going to be going on holidays. Even
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  Speaker 4: though there's talk that you know, there's a bit more
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  Speaker 4: interstate movement and that kind of thing, most people are
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  Speaker 4: pretty much saying, yeah, we're going to stay put. And
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  Speaker 4: then this is the other thing, right, I mean, where
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  Speaker 4: you live is a tourist destination. People come to where
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  Speaker 4: you are because there's stuff to do. But when you
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  Speaker 4: live there, you kind of forget that you feel like
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  Speaker 4: you've got to go somewhere else to do all the
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  Speaker 4: touristy stuff because you live there. And how many untapped
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  Speaker 4: gems are literally in your neighborhood or in your nearest
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  Speaker 4: suburb or city. So let's say I mean we're based
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  Speaker 4: in Brisbane. Let's say we're going to plan a staycation
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  Speaker 4: and somebody's listening to this who says, I just want
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  Speaker 4: to really get my Christmas staycation sorted out. I like
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  Speaker 4: what you said already. I don't want to just really
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  Speaker 4: put a line under this. Make sure that the activities
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  Speaker 4: that you're planning are going to have the right kind
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  Speaker 4: of EBB and flow for the energy output that your
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  Speaker 4: family has got the capacity for. So we discovered with
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  Speaker 4: young children especially, but even with the big kids, one
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  Speaker 4: activity a day is usually enough.
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  Speaker 1: And that activity might only last for two hours. But
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  Speaker 1: it's just you've got to check in with your kids.
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  Speaker 1: If you've got a three year old and you're dragging
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  Speaker 1: them all over the countryside, remembering that even driving long
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  Speaker 1: distances is tiring.
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  Speaker 2: Yeah.
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  Speaker 4: Oh, and that's another thing, you know, like it's okay
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  Speaker 4: to travel two hours in the car to go on
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  Speaker 4: do an activity because if you went away, I don't know.
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  Speaker 4: Let's say you go to Cans, you're going to jump
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  Speaker 4: in the car and drive for two hours to get wherever.
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  Speaker 4: You're going to do all the fancy stuff there. So
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  Speaker 4: if you're living in Brisbane or Sydney or Melbourne or
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  Speaker 4: wherever it is that you're living, so long as the
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  Speaker 4: restrictions around coronavirus are allowing you to do that trip,
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  Speaker 4: don't be afraid to do a little bit of a drive.
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  Speaker 4: But again, one activity a day is usually enough, even
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  Speaker 4: if it's only a short one.
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  Speaker 1: So one of the things that I found really really
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  Speaker 1: helpful is recognizing that in order to have a great holiday,
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  Speaker 1: you have to have a plan. It just doesn't happen overnight,
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  Speaker 1: it doesn't happen in a blink of an eye. Without
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  Speaker 1: a plan, it's not going to be as good as
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  Speaker 1: it could be.
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  Speaker 4: So I want to talk about how you put this
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  Speaker 4: plan together, because this is where the real genius came in,
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  Speaker 4: and this is why the trip was so good. Your
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  Speaker 4: planning was amazing. Let's do that next, it's.
• 5:48
  Speaker 2: The Happy Families podcast.
• 5:50
  Speaker 3: Imagine a home where discipline got results without anyone having
• 5:53
  Speaker 3: to feel bad or in trouble. The Do's and don'ts
• 5:55
  Speaker 3: of discipline as a webinar to help parents set limits
• 5:58
  Speaker 3: with love, compassion and humanity. Find it now at happy
• 6:02
  Speaker 3: families dot com dot au slash shop.
• 6:05
  Speaker 4: It's the Happy Families podcast, the podcast for the time
• 6:07
  Speaker 4: poor parent who just wants answers now. And we're talking
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  Speaker 4: about how to plan literally how to plan and get
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  Speaker 4: the EBB and the flow and the energy and the
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  Speaker 4: costs all right for your Christmas staycation because with COVID,
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  Speaker 4: who wants to go anywhere.
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  Speaker 1: So I think one of the most important things to
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  Speaker 1: remember is that planning actually takes time, and if we
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  Speaker 1: try and do it the day before kids finish up
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  Speaker 1: for the school term or whatever, we're actually going to
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  Speaker 1: really struggle. So one of the things that I found
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  Speaker 1: really really helpful for me is that knowing that a
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  Speaker 1: holiday is coming up, I kind of my feelers are
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  Speaker 1: going out, you know, at the beginning of the term,
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  Speaker 1: knowing that the holiday is going to be ten weeks
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  Speaker 1: down the track.
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  Speaker 2: So what are you looking for?
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  Speaker 1: So I will, you know, look at what my friends
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  Speaker 1: are posting from their previous holidays and the things that
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  Speaker 1: they're posting. If they're local, i'll kind of, you know,
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  Speaker 1: just make a mental note or I will often have,
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  Speaker 1: you know, a little notebook where I keep some ideas. Oh,
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  Speaker 1: my friends, they went to Fraser Island. That looks like
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  Speaker 1: a really cool holiday. Make sure I talk to them
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  Speaker 1: about what they did and how they did it.
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  Speaker 4: Yeah, or Tanglooma or Morton or whatever it is. Because
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  Speaker 4: obviously with that Brisbane connection, that's what we're talking about.
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  Speaker 4: But if you're in Tasmani and it might be Bruney Island,
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  Speaker 4: or if you're in Sydney, it might be jumping into
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  Speaker 4: the middle of Sydney Harbor to Fort Dennison or something
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  Speaker 4: like that. All that sort of stuff is right there,
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  Speaker 4: and when you see someone do it, it sets off
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  Speaker 4: this little signal thing. Okay, make sure I locked that
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  Speaker 4: one away for our next trip.
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  Speaker 1: Yeah, So save the post or make a note of
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  Speaker 1: it so that you've got it there. And then as
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  Speaker 1: you actually sit down to create your plan, you've got
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  Speaker 1: all of these ideas and you can start to explore
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  Speaker 1: them more by utilizing their web pages to kind of
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  Speaker 1: see whether or not this is something that's actually going
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  Speaker 1: to work for your family. But if they're you know,
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  Speaker 1: close friends having a conversation with them about what worked
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  Speaker 1: for them and what did.
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  Speaker 4: And I was going to say, I've seen you do
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  Speaker 4: this many times. You would just jump online and reach
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  Speaker 4: out to a friend and say, hey, I saw that
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  Speaker 4: you did that activity. What can you tell me about it?
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  Speaker 4: Or I know that you went on a trip over there.
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  Speaker 4: What did you discover If you were to do that
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  Speaker 4: trip again, what would you do differently? And so you'll
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  Speaker 4: you just ask those questions, even if it's a local thing.
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  Speaker 1: You know.
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  Speaker 2: So again we're based in Brisbane.
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  Speaker 4: If we saw somebody go to Morton Island or go
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  Speaker 4: to Straty, we'd say what was the best, what was
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  Speaker 4: the worst?
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  Speaker 2: What would you do? What would you not do? What
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  Speaker 2: would you know? You get that informat?
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  Speaker 1: Did you get your best money's you know, value? Yeah, experience?
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  Speaker 2: Would you would you want.
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  Speaker 1: To take a six year old on that activity? You know,
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  Speaker 1: it's really great having that inside scope because you can
• 8:29
  Speaker 1: talk to the person on the other end of the
• 8:30
  Speaker 1: phone and they'll tell you whatever you want to hear,
• 8:33
  Speaker 1: basically because they're looking for some another sale, another sale.
• 8:37
  Speaker 1: But your friends are going to be honest with you.
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  Speaker 1: They're going to go. You know what, we took our
• 8:40
  Speaker 1: four year old and we probably shouldn't, or my four
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  Speaker 1: year old loved it. Your kids are going to just
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  Speaker 1: have a ball.
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  Speaker 2: Where else do you go to get more information to
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  Speaker 2: put this plan together?
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  Speaker 1: So the other places that I go, I've actually only
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  Speaker 1: just started using trip advisor. I find that sometimes it
• 8:54
  Speaker 1: can be overwhelming because there's so many reviews. But trip
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  Speaker 1: advisor has been a brilliant source of information because it
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  Speaker 1: actually brings up other stuff that I haven't even thought
• 9:05
  Speaker 1: of in my search as a result of you know,
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  Speaker 1: kind of I'm putting in I want to go to
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  Speaker 1: you know, I want to do some four wheel driving,
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  Speaker 1: for instance, and it will bring up whatever's available in
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  Speaker 1: my space. And then the reviews, and the reviews are
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  Speaker 1: really helpful because there's lots of different families who've done it.
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  Speaker 4: Yeah, and something else entrip advisor or any of your
• 9:25
  Speaker 4: review site. As long as you've got a good number
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  Speaker 4: of reviews, the research seems to suggest that, on average,
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  Speaker 4: you can trust.
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  Speaker 2: What people are saying.
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  Speaker 4: You know, on average, if you've got a score of
• 9:35
  Speaker 4: four point three out of five or four point six
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  Speaker 4: out of five, it's going to be pretty good. If
• 9:39
  Speaker 4: you've got three point seven out of five, yeah, you
• 9:41
  Speaker 4: might want to give that one to miss. And don't
• 9:43
  Speaker 4: worry about reading every single review because the content can
• 9:46
  Speaker 4: be overwhelming. And from a psychological science point of view,
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  Speaker 4: if you've got one and fifty reviews, you can pretty
• 9:53
  Speaker 4: much trust that the average of those reviews is going
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  Speaker 4: to be a really good reflection of the quality. Yes,
• 9:58
  Speaker 4: some people have a lousy experience, Yes some people have
• 10:01
  Speaker 4: exceptional experiences, but on average, if you're scoring four point
• 10:05
  Speaker 4: three or above, you know that this is going to
• 10:07
  Speaker 4: be a pretty good experience unless you get a bad day.
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  Speaker 1: One of the things that I've learned from you in
• 10:12
  Speaker 1: utilizing the feedback that comes up on trip Advisor is
• 10:15
  Speaker 1: you know, you look at the great reviews, but you've
• 10:17
  Speaker 1: also looked at the negatives, and those negatives kind of
• 10:22
  Speaker 1: give you an idea of is this just somebody having
• 10:24
  Speaker 1: a bad day. But if you have a handful of
• 10:26
  Speaker 1: people who are all saying the same thing, then you
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  Speaker 1: kind of go, Okay, is this something that I'm willing
• 10:31
  Speaker 1: to kind of, you know, work with, or is this
• 10:34
  Speaker 1: really not going to work for our family? And so
• 10:36
  Speaker 1: I feel like sometimes reading some of the more negative
• 10:40
  Speaker 1: things can be helpful and you kind of, you know,
• 10:42
  Speaker 1: making sense of what's going on.
• 10:43
  Speaker 2: Okay space.
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  Speaker 4: So we've got Facebook, we've got what our friends are
• 10:46
  Speaker 4: up to, we've got conversations with friends, and we've got
• 10:49
  Speaker 4: trip Advisor.
• 10:50
  Speaker 2: Where else do you go to get more information?
• 10:51
  Speaker 1: So when we did the Brisbane trip, the one place
• 10:53
  Speaker 1: that actually I found most helpful because we were looking
• 10:57
  Speaker 1: for activities that were free or low cost, was utilizing
• 11:01
  Speaker 1: the local city council's websites. They gave me a plithor
• 11:06
  Speaker 1: of opportunities to tap into for the kids in the
• 11:11
  Speaker 1: school holidays. They tell you things like what free activities
• 11:15
  Speaker 1: are available in the shopping centers and where, what time
• 11:17
  Speaker 1: they'll be, And they'll tell you about local theaters. You
• 11:21
  Speaker 1: mentioned we went to a local theater. They kind of
• 11:23
  Speaker 1: were able to tap into that and kind of those
• 11:26
  Speaker 1: those amateur theater plays I really good for the young kids.
• 11:31
  Speaker 1: We went and.
• 11:31
  Speaker 2: Saw shots Web.
• 11:34
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and the kids have got a picture with the
• 11:36
  Speaker 1: little pig and he had you know, his like egg
• 11:40
  Speaker 1: egg cup nose, you know, in his little pink face.
• 11:44
  Speaker 4: I mean the reality is that theater production was was terrible.
• 11:48
  Speaker 2: You know, I was a totally amateur theater production.
• 11:50
  Speaker 4: But we went with the kids and with the cousins,
• 11:52
  Speaker 4: and I don't know, maybe it cost ten bucks ahead
• 11:55
  Speaker 4: or something like that.
• 11:56
  Speaker 2: But even though it was terrible, it was so awesome.
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  Speaker 1: They loved it. And having a photo with all of
• 12:01
  Speaker 1: all the cast cast at the other end.
• 12:03
  Speaker 4: None of them have ever made it to Hollywood, but
• 12:06
  Speaker 4: it doesn't matter because it was such a great experience.
• 12:08
  Speaker 4: So I think that what you're really highlighting is make
• 12:12
  Speaker 4: sure that you work out how many days of activities
• 12:14
  Speaker 4: you need. Find an activity for every day or every
• 12:17
  Speaker 4: other day, make sure that it fits your budget, make
• 12:20
  Speaker 4: sure that the energy levels are high, and utilize those
• 12:22
  Speaker 4: easy online resources. And the friends and the people that
• 12:25
  Speaker 4: you know. I mean just having a conversation with someone
• 12:27
  Speaker 4: and saying we're having a staycation. If you were to
• 12:29
  Speaker 4: stay in you know, in this town, the town in
• 12:33
  Speaker 4: which you live, or this city the city in which
• 12:35
  Speaker 4: we live, and go and do the most fun thing
• 12:38
  Speaker 4: you could do on that day, what would you do?
• 12:41
  Speaker 4: And your friends are going to have loads of ideas.
• 12:43
  Speaker 1: Yes, so there's one other place I love to go
• 12:45
  Speaker 1: for ideas, Pinterest.
• 12:49
  Speaker 2: I wouldn't have guessed that one.
• 12:50
  Speaker 1: It really is so I just kind of google top
• 12:52
  Speaker 1: places or must see places in Brisbane and you will
• 12:56
  Speaker 1: have a blog post after blog post after blog posts
• 13:00
  Speaker 1: of people who have done it and their top tips
• 13:04
  Speaker 1: for the space that you're looking to holiday in.
• 13:07
  Speaker 4: Well, I'm really looking forward to whatever it is that
• 13:09
  Speaker 4: we end up planning. And when I say we, I
• 13:11
  Speaker 4: mean you end up planning for our upcoming Christmas staycation
• 13:14
  Speaker 4: in Brizzy. All I know is that we're having a
• 13:16
  Speaker 4: couple of weeks and the plan is a day either
• 13:19
  Speaker 4: at the beach or at the pool, followed by a
• 13:20
  Speaker 4: day doing something awesome, followed by another day at the
• 13:23
  Speaker 4: beach or pool, followed by another day doing something awesome
• 13:25
  Speaker 4: for a couple of weeks. So we're looking for six
• 13:27
  Speaker 4: or seven awesome activities around Brisbane. Wherever you are, I
• 13:30
  Speaker 4: hope that you have been able to get some inspiration
• 13:33
  Speaker 4: for how you're going to plan your upcoming Christmas staycation.
• 13:37
  Speaker 4: Thanks so much to covid. If you are getting away,
• 13:40
  Speaker 4: good luck to you. I hope you enjoyed that as well,
• 13:42
  Speaker 4: and hopefully this has been helpful. We sure do hope
• 13:44
  Speaker 4: that you enjoyed the podcast. If you do enjoy the podcast,
• 13:47
  Speaker 4: we invite you to visit Apple Podcasts and leave a
• 13:49
  Speaker 4: rating and a five star review.
• 13:51
  Speaker 2: Please.
• 13:52
  Speaker 4: It's the reviews that help people to find the podcast
• 13:54
  Speaker 4: and have happier families. Hate just found out we're in
• 13:57
  Speaker 4: the top eight percent of podcasts in terms the number
• 14:00
  Speaker 4: of people who listen to what we're saying. So well done, missus.
• 14:03
  Speaker 4: Happy Family is doing a great job. How awesome is
• 14:05
  Speaker 4: that worldwide? The top eight percent?
• 14:08
  Speaker 1: That's crazy? I know.
• 14:09
  Speaker 4: I mean there's about a bajillion podcast so that means
• 14:12
  Speaker 4: that there's probably about four hundred and fifty.
• 14:13
  Speaker 2: Million in front of us. But in the top eight percent,
• 14:15
  Speaker 2: I'll take that. You know what.
• 14:18
  Speaker 4: We have an executive producer, Craig Bruce, who was helping
• 14:21
  Speaker 4: us to hopefully get into the top seven percent, maybe
• 14:23
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