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6. Downsizing Without the Overwhelm: Where to Start · Simple Enough: Organizing, Productivity, and Mindset for Entrepreneurs

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_00: Downsizing isn't decluttering with a deadline.
• 0:02
  SPEAKER_00: It's deciding what comes with you into the next chapter of your life.
• 0:06
  SPEAKER_00: And once you realize this, you can start taking the stress out of downsizing.
• 0:11
  SPEAKER_00: If you're smart and capable,
• 0:13
  SPEAKER_00: but overwhelmed by too many decisions,
• 0:15
  SPEAKER_00: half-built systems,
• 0:17
  SPEAKER_00: and things you keep meaning to get to, you're in the right place.
• 0:21
  SPEAKER_00: Welcome to Simple Enough.
• 0:26
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe you're suddenly realizing your house is too big to care for and aging would be
• 0:31
  SPEAKER_00: a lot easier with less stuff and somewhere smaller.
• 0:35
  SPEAKER_00: Wouldn't that be nice?
• 0:37
  SPEAKER_00: And oh my gosh, there's just so much.
• 0:39
  SPEAKER_00: What am I going to do with my things?
• 0:42
  SPEAKER_00: I don't have the energy.
• 0:43
  SPEAKER_00: I hear it all the time.
• 0:44
  SPEAKER_00: Or maybe you just pulled up to your parents' house and you are worried
• 0:48
  SPEAKER_00: about their safety and what will happen when they can't take care of
• 0:53
  SPEAKER_00: the house anymore.
• 0:54
  SPEAKER_00: You want to help.
• 0:55
  SPEAKER_00: You're quietly overwhelmed and not sure where to even start the conversation.
• 1:01
  SPEAKER_00: Good news is, what makes downsizing feel so daunting is an easy identifier.
• 1:08
  SPEAKER_00: It's the lifetime of memories, uncertainty, and letting go of all the identities.
• 1:14
  SPEAKER_00: This isn't decluttering with a deadline.
• 1:16
  SPEAKER_00: It's deciding what comes with you into the next chapter of your life,
• 1:20
  SPEAKER_00: and that's a much bigger question than, do I need this?
• 1:24
  SPEAKER_00: We always start with the dream.
• 1:27
  SPEAKER_00: So before anything gets touched, remember that we are doing a recreation here.
• 1:31
  SPEAKER_00: What do you want your new life to be like?
• 1:34
  SPEAKER_00: What do you want to free up the energy to do?
• 1:37
  SPEAKER_00: When you skip this step, every single item becomes an argument.
• 1:41
  SPEAKER_00: You just can't win.
• 1:43
  SPEAKER_00: But answering these questions creates the criteria for deciding about each
• 1:47
  SPEAKER_00: and every item without the self-doubt.
• 1:50
  SPEAKER_00: Now decisions that used to take 20 minutes take 20 seconds.
• 1:53
  SPEAKER_00: Because it starts with, does this item actually support me?
• 1:57
  SPEAKER_00: The thing that stops people in their tracks is the fear of forgetting.
• 2:01
  SPEAKER_00: We hold on to things to remember, but we don't remember.
• 2:05
  SPEAKER_00: Every time we remember something,
• 2:07
  SPEAKER_00: it's different than when it actually happened because it's through the lens
• 2:11
  SPEAKER_00: of today's knowledge and experience.
• 2:14
  SPEAKER_00: The stuff just happened to be there when the original experience took place.
• 2:19
  SPEAKER_00: So what if you didn't have to worry about all the things anymore?
• 2:22
  SPEAKER_00: You want to plan ahead for the excuses that will stop your momentum.
• 2:26
  SPEAKER_00: When you think, I paid good money for it, it can become, the money's already spent.
• 2:32
  SPEAKER_00: Someone else will love this thing.
• 2:34
  SPEAKER_00: This belonged to the person I used to be becomes now I am me.
• 2:38
  SPEAKER_00: It was my mother's becomes she meant me to be free.
• 2:42
  SPEAKER_00: And remember that someone who might need it someday won't find it if you keep it.
• 2:47
  SPEAKER_00: The fact that you still have things because you took care
• 2:50
  SPEAKER_00: of them Doesn't mean you are the one that has to be always responsible for them.
• 2:55
  SPEAKER_00: It's natural to feel like holding on tighter when we are unsure of what's about to happen.
• 3:01
  SPEAKER_00: Another way of looking at it is you never know what might happen,
• 3:05
  SPEAKER_00: so you might as well travel light.
• 3:07
  SPEAKER_00: The easiest way to approach downsizing is to gather the memories while eliminating
• 3:12
  SPEAKER_00: the obvious things and then pick your favorites.
• 3:15
  SPEAKER_00: That's the whole process.
• 3:17
  SPEAKER_00: So what this looks like is that by choosing what's essential for your new space
• 3:22
  SPEAKER_00: and your new life,
• 3:23
  SPEAKER_00: you are covered and your space becomes the limiter of how much more you can bring
• 3:28
  SPEAKER_00: with you.
• 3:29
  SPEAKER_00: Then you fill in with your favorite things.
• 3:31
  SPEAKER_00: That's the delightful part.
• 3:33
  SPEAKER_00: What will delight you?
• 3:35
  SPEAKER_00: The memories are gathered together to deal with later because these are the items
• 3:39
  SPEAKER_00: that can cause the most spin without making a decision.
• 3:42
  SPEAKER_00: Once you've practiced the decision making, the memory pile gets so much easier to deal with.
• 3:48
  SPEAKER_00: And if you never do, that's fine too.
• 3:50
  SPEAKER_00: At least it will be consolidated and gathered all in one place instead of being all
• 3:55
  SPEAKER_00: over the place.
• 3:56
  SPEAKER_00: So if you're helping a parent, we want to approach this with curiosity.
• 4:01
  SPEAKER_00: Let them tell their stories.
• 4:04
  SPEAKER_00: Let them make as many decisions as possible.
• 4:06
  SPEAKER_00: Honor the identity they're telling you about.
• 4:10
  SPEAKER_00: Instead of stepping in to do it for them,
• 4:13
  SPEAKER_00: keep the momentum going by putting those difficult things off to the side.
• 4:17
  SPEAKER_00: And you begin with the easy and obvious things.
• 4:20
  SPEAKER_00: Those are the things you can let go of right now.
• 4:23
  SPEAKER_00: Clearing the space and energy.
• 4:26
  SPEAKER_00: To make the harder decisions.
• 4:27
  SPEAKER_00: And those become easier when more information is revealed.
• 4:31
  SPEAKER_00: It's not about the stuff.
• 4:33
  SPEAKER_00: It's about the life and the fear.
• 4:36
  SPEAKER_00: So reassurance and patience are essential here.
• 4:40
  SPEAKER_00: You want to honor those things that reflect their identity.
• 4:44
  SPEAKER_00: And you might just figure out who your parents really are.
• 4:47
  SPEAKER_00: That's the fun part.
• 4:49
  SPEAKER_00: There are a lot of things that feel counterintuitive about downsizing,
• 4:53
  SPEAKER_00: but this way you actually make overall progress faster.
• 4:57
  SPEAKER_00: It just feels really slow in the beginning.
• 5:00
  SPEAKER_00: I recently worked with a client who had inherited an awful lot of things.
• 5:06
  SPEAKER_00: She had unknowingly to herself become the keeper of the dead.
• 5:09
  SPEAKER_00: She had things from her parents,
• 5:11
  SPEAKER_00: her grandparents,
• 5:12
  SPEAKER_00: her aunts,
• 5:13
  SPEAKER_00: her uncles,
• 5:13
  SPEAKER_00: her siblings,
• 5:14
  SPEAKER_00: her friends,
• 5:15
  SPEAKER_00: and there were items everywhere to help her remember the people in her life.
• 5:22
  SPEAKER_00: And once we started gathering the memories in one place, things got way faster.
• 5:28
  SPEAKER_00: She had been working for almost three years on just looking at the memories,
• 5:33
  SPEAKER_00: reviewing the things, trying to figure out what the best.
• 5:36
  SPEAKER_00: So when I came in,
• 5:37
  SPEAKER_00: it was about three months before her ultimate move to an assisted living facility,
• 5:41
  SPEAKER_00: and we started with the essentials.
• 5:43
  SPEAKER_00: And then we...
• 5:51
  SPEAKER_00: Picked some favorite things.
• 5:53
  SPEAKER_00: She had so many beautiful things.
• 5:54
  SPEAKER_00: It was a little bit difficult, but we knew how much she could take.
• 5:58
  SPEAKER_00: And then we dealt with the memories.
• 6:00
  SPEAKER_00: And she was left with a new fabulous apartment with a well-curated bucket
• 6:06
  SPEAKER_00: of memories of her friends and really allowed her to see all the contradictions
• 6:12
  SPEAKER_00: and wonder of what she had been doing.
• 6:15
  SPEAKER_00: And how she might move on.
• 6:17
  SPEAKER_00: So now she gets to just connect with the newer people in her life and she is having
• 6:22
  SPEAKER_00: a fabulous time.
• 6:24
  SPEAKER_00: And she has that assortment of stories from her dear ones.
• 6:27
  SPEAKER_00: And that is what adventure really is.
• 6:32
  SPEAKER_00: So the best part is you don't have to wait until you move to start downsizing.
• 6:38
  SPEAKER_00: In fact, it's actually more fun when you have more energy.
• 6:41
  SPEAKER_00: So you might as well get started any time you feel a transition coming on.
• 6:45
  SPEAKER_00: Just let go.
• 6:46
  SPEAKER_00: What I've come to realize in working with people that are downsizing is
• 6:49
  SPEAKER_00: that everyone has a fabulous story and it's never about the stuff.
• 6:54
  SPEAKER_00: In fact, downsizing one decision at a time allows you to tell the story you want remembered.
• 7:02
  SPEAKER_00: Let's talk about how you can get started.
• 7:04
  SPEAKER_00: I recommend,
• 7:06
  SPEAKER_00: even if you're not going to do a full downsizing,
• 7:08
  SPEAKER_00: to at least designate,
• 7:10
  SPEAKER_00: set up a place that will be to gather all of your memorabilia and photos.
• 7:17
  SPEAKER_00: Now, all you have to do is designate the space to get started.
• 7:20
  SPEAKER_00: If you want to, you can gather some very obvious things and put them there.
• 7:24
  SPEAKER_00: But whether you pick a bin,
• 7:25
  SPEAKER_00: a corner of an office,
• 7:27
  SPEAKER_00: a coat closet,
• 7:28
  SPEAKER_00: the guest room,
• 7:29
  SPEAKER_00: the garage,
• 7:30
  SPEAKER_00: however much you think you might have,
• 7:32
  SPEAKER_00: just start finding those pieces you are holding on just for the memory and put them
• 7:38
  SPEAKER_00: in that pile.
• 7:39
  SPEAKER_00: Then deal with the functionality and the beauty of your home and then revisit the other things.
• 7:46
  SPEAKER_00: Of course, you don't have to put every single thing in there.
• 7:48
  SPEAKER_00: If you already know something can go, by all means, let it go.
• 7:52
  SPEAKER_00: Right now.
• 7:53
  SPEAKER_00: Good.
• 7:53
  SPEAKER_00: Put in the trash, the recycle, whatever you need to do with it.
• 7:56
  SPEAKER_00: But it gives you a place to hold your memories.
• 7:59
  SPEAKER_00: And it's a contained space.
• 8:01
  SPEAKER_00: So now it won't feel like clutter anymore.
• 8:03
  SPEAKER_00: Some of it may get pulled out to be really well honored and displayed and part of
• 8:10
  SPEAKER_00: the delight in your home.
• 8:11
  SPEAKER_00: But when you deal with the mundane things first and then make the decisions about
• 8:16
  SPEAKER_00: the memory, they will be different the next time through.
• 8:20
  SPEAKER_00: You will have more information,
• 8:21
  SPEAKER_00: you will be surer of yourself, and you will be able to curate the stories.
• 8:27
  SPEAKER_00: So by the time you get back to that memory pile, you'll have had that practice.
• 8:32
  SPEAKER_00: Better decisions, or you won't even remember why you kept it in the first place.
• 8:37
  SPEAKER_00: Either way, it's easier to let go.
• 8:40
  SPEAKER_00: Visit morethanorganized.net slash podcast launch for step-by-step instructions
• 8:43
  SPEAKER_00: on how to follow, rate, and review.
• 9:12
  SPEAKER_00: Thanks for spending this time with me today.
• 9:14
  SPEAKER_00: Before you go,
• 9:15
  SPEAKER_00: choose one thing from this episode that could make life just
• 9:18
  SPEAKER_00: a little simpler this week.
• 9:20
  SPEAKER_00: Not perfect, just simple enough.
• 9:22
  SPEAKER_00: Come join me on Substack at morethanorganized.substack.com and remember,
• 9:27
  SPEAKER_00: organizing doesn't have to be so hard.
• 9:29
  SPEAKER_00: I'll see you soon.
• 9:30
  SPEAKER_00: In the meantime, have a delightful day.