Latest / Mic Drop Comedy / Trump Tries to Catch Reflecting Pool _Vandals_ _ Miami Gets a Scottish Takeover _ The Daily Show

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Trump Tries to Catch Reflecting Pool _Vandals_ _ Miami Gets a Scottish Takeover _ The Daily Show · Mic Drop Comedy

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Welcome to The Daily Show. I'm Josh Johnson. We've got
• 0:03
  Speaker 1: so much to talk about tonight. The Scottish teach Miami
• 0:06
  Speaker 1: that not all music needs rhythm. Louis Black gets bent
• 0:09
  Speaker 1: out of shape about getting in shape. And Donald Trump's
• 0:12
  Speaker 1: reflecting pool is having issues. Or was it murder? So,
• 0:18
  Speaker 1: let's get into the headlines. Let's start with the biggest
• 0:25
  Speaker 1: story in sports right now. The World Cup fans have
• 0:27
  Speaker 1: come from all over the world to see which country
• 0:30
  Speaker 1: has the most athletic black people. But one country has
• 0:35
  Speaker 1: been making their presence known a little more than the rest.
• 0:38
  Speaker 2: South Florida's getting taken over by the Scottish this week
• 0:41
  Speaker 2: for the World Cup, turning Little Havana into an international
• 0:45
  Speaker 2: street party.
• 0:46
  Speaker 1: We don't have any rules, so.
• 0:54
  Speaker 3: Watch out again.
• 0:57
  Speaker 1: This is so fun. Also, I'm just happy to see
• 1:01
  Speaker 1: an all-white parade where they're not chanting about the Jews.
• 1:07
  Speaker 1: I'm not sure about the bagpipes, though. You know the
• 1:09
  Speaker 1: Loch Ness Monster is back in Scotland right now. Like, finally,
• 1:12
  Speaker 1: I can get some sleep. The only reason I'm so
• 1:16
  Speaker 1: elusive is because I don't want to hear those damn bagpipes.
• 1:20
  Speaker 1: But let's get to the big story. It has now
• 1:23
  Speaker 1: been 10 weeks since the start of the war that
• 1:26
  Speaker 1: has come to define Donald Trump's second term. So let's
• 1:28
  Speaker 1: get right into our continuing coverage of the Washington DC
• 1:32
  Speaker 1: reflecting pool. Looks like shit. Ever since the Lincoln Memorial
• 1:47
  Speaker 1: Reflecting Pool turned bright green, which is a thing I
• 1:49
  Speaker 1: just said like it's totally normal, it's become the first
• 1:53
  Speaker 1: breakout hit of the summer. Tourists are actually flocking to
• 1:56
  Speaker 1: the Lincoln Memorial Reflecting Pool to catch a glimpse of
• 1:59
  Speaker 1: the controversial renovation. It's kind of disgusting. It looks like
• 2:03
  Speaker 1: it's green. It looks like... It looks like vomit. And
• 2:05
  Speaker 1: it smells really bad. I had to see for myself.
• 2:08
  Speaker 1: I couldn't believe it. Hey, kids, remember you wanted to
• 2:12
  Speaker 1: go to Disneyland? Instead, we're going to go see the
• 2:15
  Speaker 1: world's largest kombucha. You know, everybody's complaining about the pool,
• 2:21
  Speaker 1: but they're coming out to see it. I'm not saying
• 2:23
  Speaker 1: it's better this way. I'm just saying it seems to
• 2:26
  Speaker 1: be pretty popular. This is how far America has fallen.
• 2:29
  Speaker 1: The last time we collected this many people around the
• 2:32
  Speaker 1: reflecting pool was for civil rights. People were like, we
• 2:36
  Speaker 1: must come out to support Dr. King. 60 years later,
• 2:39
  Speaker 1: we're like, a slimy pool? This I gotta see.
• 2:41
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 2:45
  Speaker 1: Now, anyone who's ever owned a swimming pool or a
• 2:47
  Speaker 1: fish tank or a bong that they never wash will
• 2:51
  Speaker 1: not be surprised that there's algae in the pool, and
• 2:53
  Speaker 1: a shallow pool like this with a dark bottom in
• 2:56
  Speaker 1: hot weather is particularly hard to keep clean. I know
• 2:59
  Speaker 1: that because half the people I follow on social media
• 3:01
  Speaker 1: are pool experts all of a sudden. This is a
• 3:04
  Speaker 1: completely natural and expected development, but Donald Trump thinks there's
• 3:09
  Speaker 1: something else to blame.
• 3:10
  Speaker 3: We have a, I think, 290, 300-foot slit right through it,
• 3:15
  Speaker 3: probably a box cutter or a knife of some kind.
• 3:18
  Speaker 3: They cut it very violently. The same thing with the floor,
• 3:21
  Speaker 3: they cut it. And then they lifted it, they pulled it.
• 3:24
  Speaker 3: I can't help it if somebody goes in with a
• 3:26
  Speaker 3: knife and starts.
• 3:28
  Speaker 1: Hacking it up.
• 3:28
  Speaker 3: Who would think that somebody would go into a pool
• 3:31
  Speaker 3: and take a knife and start cutting it?
• 3:33
  Speaker 1: Yeah, who would think of something like that? Two months ago.
• 3:39
  Speaker 3: This will last for at least 50 years and.
• 3:41
  Speaker 1: You'll never have a leak.
• 3:42
  Speaker 3: It's very strong. You couldn't, if you had a knife,
• 3:45
  Speaker 3: I don't want to give anybody ideas.
• 3:47
  Speaker 1: If you had a knife, you can't even cut it.
• 3:51
  Speaker 1: I've never seen someone have a line of logic so
• 3:54
  Speaker 1: stupid they reverse inception themselves. Me from before had the
• 4:00
  Speaker 1: idea to never. I told myself it couldn't be done
• 4:03
  Speaker 1: and then I forgot. That's why it happened. Look, I'll
• 4:10
  Speaker 1: admit right now, I'm one of Trump's biggest haters, but Donnie,
• 4:13
  Speaker 1: let me help you out. You have got to chill.
• 4:16
  Speaker 1: People are not shanking the pool at night. Also, algae
• 4:21
  Speaker 1: can't be that hard to get rid of. I mean, damn,
• 4:23
  Speaker 1: you got one of the biggest algae eaters in your cabinet.
• 4:37
  Speaker 1: send him down to the pool, he'll be like, mm,
• 4:39
  Speaker 1: looks like soup. Broccoli cheddar. The point is, don't go
• 4:46
  Speaker 1: around escalating the situation. This morning, the National Guard and
• 4:50
  Speaker 1: Park Police patrolling the reflecting pool on the National Mall.
• 4:53
  Speaker 2: There are cameras stationed every 50 yards or so.
• 4:56
  Speaker 3: The president had Marine One do a flyover around the
• 5:00
  Speaker 3: reflecting pool.
• 5:02
  Speaker 1: According to the White House, 17 police reports have been
• 5:04
  Speaker 1: filed for vandalism, leading to six arrests. Dang, you treating
• 5:09
  Speaker 1: the reflecting pool like Epstein drowned in it. Just imagine
• 5:16
  Speaker 1: what Iran must be thinking right now. They turn on
• 5:18
  Speaker 1: the TV like, where are the Americans plotting to send
• 5:20
  Speaker 1: their force? Damn. Are they even thinking about us? And
• 5:27
  Speaker 1: I get Trump's disappointed because according to him, this was
• 5:29
  Speaker 1: going to be the best pool in the history of water.
• 5:32
  Speaker 3: President Obama, President Biden spent much more than $ 100 million
• 5:36
  Speaker 3: on the reflecting lake.
• 5:38
  Speaker 1: You know what they got out of it? A closed lake.
• 5:41
  Speaker 3: I'm doing the super job, and it's going to be
• 5:43
  Speaker 3: much better. It's going to be something very special. It'll be,
• 5:46
  Speaker 3: I think, very reflective.
• 5:47
  Speaker 1: Very, very good. It's like a piece of glass. Beautiful color,
• 5:51
  Speaker 1: beautiful everything. You could never get... Anything like that.
• 5:54
  Speaker 3: It's going to look better than it did in 1922
• 5:56
  Speaker 3: when it was built.
• 5:57
  Speaker 1: The Lincoln Memorial, look at that. Beautiful.
• 6:00
  Speaker 3: Look at how that reflects.
• 6:01
  Speaker 1: It's like a mirror. See, that's your problem right there.
• 6:05
  Speaker 1: You talked it up so much, you jinxed it. Now
• 6:07
  Speaker 1: I want to let them build the ballroom. Just see
• 6:09
  Speaker 1: how bad it turns out. I bet it disintegrates at
• 6:14
  Speaker 1: the first cha-cha slide. The lesson here is, Trump, you
• 6:20
  Speaker 1: gotta wait until after you do something to flex. If
• 6:23
  Speaker 1: you had never made a big deal out of the pool,
• 6:25
  Speaker 1: no one would have noticed. I mean, RFK would still
• 6:28
  Speaker 1: be down there, because to him, that's yummy. But Trump
• 6:33
  Speaker 1: basically shot a buzzer-beating, game-winning shot, turned around and threw
• 6:36
  Speaker 1: his hands up in the air to celebrate, and then
• 6:39
  Speaker 1: instead of going in, it missed and killed a baby duckling.
• 6:44
  Speaker 1: Now you got people across the country coming over to
• 6:46
  Speaker 1: gawk at the fact that you turned the reflecting pool
• 6:49
  Speaker 1: into a Kool-Aid bucket. And all your supporters in the
• 6:52
  Speaker 1: media who should be defending your Iran disaster or your
• 6:55
  Speaker 1: economic disaster have to defend this disaster. I think this
• 6:59
  Speaker 1: is Trump derangement syndrome at its finest.
• 7:01
  Speaker 2: The far left will never get behind or celebrate anything
• 7:04
  Speaker 2: that Donald Trump does.
• 7:06
  Speaker 1: News flash, algae grows in stagnant water. President Trump is
• 7:10
  Speaker 1: trying to make D.C. nicer.
• 7:11
  Speaker 2: Because guess what?
• 7:12
  Speaker 1: Presidents should care about beauty. Only the Democrats could hate
• 7:16
  Speaker 1: beautifying our nation's capital. They are rooting for his failure,
• 7:20
  Speaker 1: and in this case, they're even rooting for algae. I'm sorry,
• 7:29
  Speaker 1: this is not the point, but what is going on
• 7:31
  Speaker 1: with Sean Hannity's face? I mean, I have never seen
• 7:37
  Speaker 1: white cheeks that big that haven't been rapped about. Like,
• 7:42
  Speaker 1: I'm not trying to make fun of his looks or anything,
• 7:43
  Speaker 1: but I mean, is he auditioning for a new Chipmunks movie?
• 7:48
  Speaker 1: Where Alvin eats Simon and Theodore? I bet you squirrels
• 7:53
  Speaker 1: look at Hannity like, how my nuts taste. It looks
• 7:58
  Speaker 1: like the dentist added wisdom teeth. Sean, you got to
• 8:03
  Speaker 1: address this. You can't just walk in a room and
• 8:05
  Speaker 1: sit down in front of a camera with a BBL
• 8:08
  Speaker 1: on your face and act like we're not going to notice.
• 8:11
  Speaker 1: You got to address what's happened to anything. Like, sorry
• 8:14
  Speaker 1: about my face, y'all. I'm currently going through a nutty
• 8:16
  Speaker 1: professor type situation. It should be cleared up once I
• 8:19
  Speaker 1: learn to love and accept myself for who I truly am.
• 8:22
  Speaker 1: For more on the status of Reflecting Pool, we go
• 8:24
  Speaker 1: live to Washington, D.C. with Michael Kosta. Michael, hit us
• 8:39
  Speaker 1: with the updates.
• 8:40
  Speaker 2: Josh, I'm down here at the reflecting pool, and it
• 8:43
  Speaker 2: is still a disaster. The once clear water, now a
• 8:47
  Speaker 2: cloudy mixture of green sludge that reflects not the Washington Monument,
• 8:51
  Speaker 2: but the corruption that runs deep in this administration. It
• 8:54
  Speaker 2: is disgusting, and I want to drink it. Back to you, Josh.
• 8:59
  Speaker 1: Wait, Michael, did you say you wanted to drink the
• 9:01
  Speaker 1: pool water? What? Of course not.
• 9:04
  Speaker 2: It's a green swamp. An intoxicating green. Unnatural and yet
• 9:10
  Speaker 2: dancing in a hypnotizing swirl of foam. Sorry, Josh, you
• 9:15
  Speaker 2: were saying that I should drink the water.
• 9:17
  Speaker 1: No, Costa, you cannot drink the water. I'm pretty sure
• 9:19
  Speaker 1: you'll die. Of course I will.
• 9:22
  Speaker 2: I probably will. I mean, one thing's for certain. Whether
• 9:25
  Speaker 2: it's the Iran war or his January 6th pardons... President
• 9:31
  Speaker 2: Trump has shown that he's unable to lead this nation
• 9:34
  Speaker 2: with dignity and ethics. So cheers to you, Josh.
• 9:37
  Speaker 1: Michael, did you just scoop up the water from the pool?
• 9:41
  Speaker 1: Did I?
• 9:42
  Speaker 2: I just blacked out. The next thing I know, it
• 9:44
  Speaker 2: was in my hands. Oh, it smells. It smells of
• 9:47
  Speaker 2: a dark and powerful bargain. A bargain that I am
• 9:52
  Speaker 2: willing to make. Michael, do not drink that water.
• 9:56
  Speaker 1: Of course not. That would be crazy. I mean, what's
• 10:01
  Speaker 1: even crazier.
• 10:04
  Speaker 2: Is that Trump's administration has bid to no contract, which
• 10:08
  Speaker 2: allowed one.
• 10:09
  Speaker 1: Of his corrupt... Wait, why are you dressing up the glass, Costa?
• 10:13
  Speaker 1: Don't drink it. Josh, okay, I'm gonna level with you.
• 10:18
  Speaker 2: I am dying to drink this water.
• 10:20
  Speaker 1: I mean... Yeah, I know. It appears the combination of
• 10:23
  Speaker 1: chemicals and negligence has made the algae some kind of
• 10:26
  Speaker 1: sentient being looking for a host to spread itself all
• 10:29
  Speaker 1: across the country. It's really a metaphor for Trump's America,
• 10:32
  Speaker 1: if you think about it.
• 10:34
  Speaker 2: Maybe. And maybe giving it... And maybe drinking it will
• 10:38
  Speaker 2: give me superpowers. You ever think about that? What if
• 10:41
  Speaker 2: it turns me into the Hulk? You know, his penis
• 10:43
  Speaker 2: becomes incredible, too.
• 10:47
  Speaker 1: It won't. At best, it will make you shit your pants.
• 10:49
  Speaker 1: Pour it out, Michael. Fine, I'll pour it out.
• 10:54
  Speaker 4: Into my mouth. Costa, no. Something's happening to me, Josh.
• 11:09
  Speaker 2: I'm shitting my pants.
• 11:12
  Speaker 1: Why did you make me do that? I didn't. Maybe
• 11:16
  Speaker 1: if I drink more water, it'll help. No, Michael Kosta, everybody.