Latest / Willow Healing Matters Podcast / Create Your Purpose (Don't Find It) | Rand Selig on Thriving, Joy & Authentic Living

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Create Your Purpose (Don't Find It) | Rand Selig on Thriving, Joy & Authentic Living · Willow Healing Matters Podcast

0:01
SPEAKER_02: welcome to willow healing matters the podcast we are so excited
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SPEAKER_02: to have you joining us on this journey where we explore different ways
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SPEAKER_02: to empower your soul whether it's healing in your kitchen or all the way up in
0:13
SPEAKER_02: the corporate world come with us as we look into different ways
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SPEAKER_02: to heal your mind body and soul
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SPEAKER_01: and today i am joined by rand salig he is an accomplished entrepreneur coach
0:27
SPEAKER_01: a scout master a board member and roll up your sleeves conservationist with an nba
0:32
SPEAKER_01: from stanford and undergraduate degrees in mathematics
0:35
SPEAKER_01: and psychology he excels at managing complex projects globally he founded
0:40
SPEAKER_01: and has run the sali capital group for over three decades his firm was named
0:44
SPEAKER_01: the best sustainable investment banking firm in the san francisco bay area in 2024
0:49
SPEAKER_01: by wealth and finance international he shares his extensive expertise
0:53
SPEAKER_01: in his book thriving how to create a healthier happier
0:57
SPEAKER_01: and more prosperous life wren is relentlessly positive
0:59
SPEAKER_01: and believes he can design his own life and others can too
1:03
SPEAKER_01: based in Mill Valley California he enjoys his life's adventures with his wife of 44 years so
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SPEAKER_00: a big welcome to the show Rand well thanks Catherine it's just so great to be here I'm
1:13
SPEAKER_01: really looking forward to our conversation and I love that you have accomplished
1:17
SPEAKER_01: so much but then
1:18
SPEAKER_01: you've written this book where it really talks about her balance because it's funny I was just
1:23
SPEAKER_01: writing an article on this about the hustle culture and so often we feel we need to push
1:32
Thank you.
1:33
SPEAKER_01: do you want to share a little bit about how the book was birthed
1:35
SPEAKER_03: into this world well i really do believe it's possible for people to get on the path
1:41
SPEAKER_03: to thriving and you know having met thousands of people worked with thousands
1:46
SPEAKER_03: of people you know i've seen that there are a lot of things
1:49
SPEAKER_03: that are holding them back from thriving and so
1:52
SPEAKER_03: you know i talk about four different elements
1:57
SPEAKER_03: to thriving thriving personally thriving with others thriving out in the world
2:01
SPEAKER_03: and thriving as you move forward in life and from there i talk a lot
2:07
SPEAKER_03: about what's holding you back what are the kinds of things that if you could look
2:11
SPEAKER_03: at them and grab them and sort of maybe give yourself a little massage
2:16
SPEAKER_03: a little love tap
2:18
SPEAKER_03: maybe you could you know move forward a little bit more briskly there's a lot
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SPEAKER_03: of very practical things in my book as well which are meant to be inspiring
2:28
SPEAKER_01: and encouraging for people yeah i think that's so amazing
2:31
SPEAKER_01: because sometimes we do have to look at those things
2:34
SPEAKER_01: that we keep attributing our life to as why it's not going to plan
2:38
SPEAKER_01: and it's almost like blaming that event rather than like you said confronting it
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SPEAKER_01: and coming face to face with it
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SPEAKER_03: well there's there's a lot of voices in our head sometimes it's mom it's dad it's
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SPEAKER_03: a teacher an old boss maybe it's just your own voice
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SPEAKER_03: and there they have repeating messages one of the messages i think a lot
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SPEAKER_03: of people listen to
3:00
SPEAKER_03: what is success and that you know the definition a lot of people have has a lot
3:06
SPEAKER_03: to do with financial outcomes and what i think we all know is we live
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SPEAKER_03: in two worlds we live in the doing world
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SPEAKER_03: which is racking up a lot
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SPEAKER_03: of accomplishments having titles earning money course spending money but
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SPEAKER_03: then there's the being world which is what kind
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SPEAKER_03: of person are you are you fulfilled are you at peace are you kind
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SPEAKER_03: and respectful these are very different worlds and
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SPEAKER_03: the powerful very profound thing is if at
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SPEAKER_03: a certain point you can just be more focused on being being
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SPEAKER_03: the person you really want to be
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SPEAKER_03: and then you go out into the world and do things you're going
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SPEAKER_03: to be happier less stressed you're going to have more impact on and more impact
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SPEAKER_03: and you're going to feel more fulfilled those are four really big takeaways
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SPEAKER_03: so you know it's a it's a great invitation for people
4:00
SPEAKER_03: that just be be be bigger big be better just be themselves too
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SPEAKER_01: you know but i think that's a lot of the time
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SPEAKER_01: that we don't realize how many masks we put on to show up in those different roles
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SPEAKER_01: and even when i know for me when i was in burnout
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SPEAKER_01: and everything else running companies you know i was like how do i get myself out
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SPEAKER_01: of this now and sometimes it can be the most honest thing you can do is walk away
4:25
SPEAKER_03: exactly right exactly but then you're walking right away for
4:28
SPEAKER_03: the right reasons hopefully and you're walking maybe at some point made
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SPEAKER_03: a little pause but you're walking towards something maybe maybe
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SPEAKER_03: at some point you can create the purpose
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SPEAKER_03: purpose is a thing gets talked about a lot but it's got a lot of elements to it
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SPEAKER_03: that i think are myth myths and they need to be exposed and blown up
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SPEAKER_03: but you don't find purpose you create purpose it's not like walking down the street
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SPEAKER_03: and finding a twenty dollar bill that's not the way purpose works
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SPEAKER_03: and purpose doesn't have
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SPEAKER_03: to be this big headline grabbing thing it can be something just really valuable
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SPEAKER_03: to you and and what you want to be delivering based on who you are out into
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SPEAKER_01: the world yeah and i feel the other aspect of that is that your purpose can shift
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SPEAKER_01: as you shift and grow and expand as well because sometimes people get stuck
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SPEAKER_01: on their dream their purpose that they had 20 years ago
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SPEAKER_01: but they've outgrown that and then all of a sudden they're not happy
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SPEAKER_01: but they're like exactly what you said start the success the material things
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SPEAKER_01: but they've forgotten okay what is what's lighting me up and what is allowing me
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SPEAKER_01: to walk toward what i feel excited about as well
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SPEAKER_03: yeah very very good catherine i i i just think that the the reinventing
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SPEAKER_03: the possibility of evolving reinventing yourself is
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SPEAKER_03: a tremendous gift we can give ourselves and you know
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SPEAKER_03: the purpose you had you know 10 years ago five years ago even
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SPEAKER_03: may may not be the purpose that really is going to get you out of bed
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SPEAKER_03: and get you going get that smile on your face today and so that that's that's being
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SPEAKER_03: the the person sitting making a beautiful piece of pottery got your hands on
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SPEAKER_03: the clay you are the thing that's being created when you do that
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SPEAKER_03: and it is just a it's a marvelous thing i've i've changed my purpose a number
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SPEAKER_03: of times in my life and all for all for the better and and with with greater clarity
6:26
SPEAKER_03: for the time that that you know i'm walking towards yeah and i'm so glad you brought
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SPEAKER_01: that up because i know i keep changing my purpose but it's not
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SPEAKER_01: unrelated it's like okay well i've achieved that or i've done that now what is
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SPEAKER_01: that next step or what feels the best thing to do next because sometimes
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SPEAKER_01: and sometimes it is completely opposite to what you're doing now and that's okay
6:49
SPEAKER_01: as well because maybe maybe this doesn't work for you anymore
6:53
SPEAKER_03: well i i think this is this is again something some people struggle with it's not
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SPEAKER_03: so simple it's easy for us to maybe talk about it i think it sounds like you both
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SPEAKER_03: of us have lived through this but it does take courage and it does take honesty
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SPEAKER_03: and it does take humility those three things you have to say look who who i was
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SPEAKER_03: before doesn't serve me now i'm
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SPEAKER_03: maybe i wasn't the best person then you know i made some mistakes and you have
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SPEAKER_03: to own them you can't just point the finger and say the boss made me
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SPEAKER_03: or you know somebody else it's you at the end did something and you have to own that
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SPEAKER_03: and then forgive
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SPEAKER_03: and along the way forgive other people as well
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SPEAKER_03: and stop self-sabotaging it's another really really big thing to do
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SPEAKER_03: to be emotionally healthy and the third of my big three emotionally healthy things
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SPEAKER_03: to do is to let go and again this is a thing that that that people can do anytime
7:53
SPEAKER_03: but it it it
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SPEAKER_03: i think comes with this sense of evolving as a person you know of the three
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SPEAKER_03: so self-sabotaging forgiving and letting go the letting go was by far
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SPEAKER_03: the hardest one and fortunately my wife and my two terrific kids
8:09
SPEAKER_03: made the point dad you're not controlling as much as you think you do and so i had
8:14
SPEAKER_03: to really look at that and i realized that i actually only control four things only
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SPEAKER_03: for the you know many many many things i only control the four things i control
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SPEAKER_03: i control the amount of effort i'm willing to put
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SPEAKER_03: into something i control my behavior well usually and then i can then make choices
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SPEAKER_03: about the actions i'm willing to take and that's that's
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SPEAKER_03: the fourth piece everything else
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SPEAKER_03: is about influence and if you're doing a good job then your influence will grow and
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SPEAKER_03: if you're not doing such a good job your influence shrinks so you know letting go
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SPEAKER_03: and i love doing this little exercise captain you might want
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SPEAKER_03: to do this i say you know imagine
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SPEAKER_03: imagine how you're holding on to something hold up your fist and you're holding
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SPEAKER_03: on you can do this with me if you like yeah and just think
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SPEAKER_03: of something you're holding on to very tightly you see your knuckles are lighter
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SPEAKER_03: than the rest of your hand you're holding on you're saying i wish i could let go of
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SPEAKER_03: that
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SPEAKER_03: and then flip your your hand over you see your knuckles also lighter the rest
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SPEAKER_03: of your hand and then magically i joke maybe
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SPEAKER_03: because you read rand's book you say i'm letting go i'm letting go now you open your
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SPEAKER_00: hands you wiggle your fingers
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SPEAKER_00: and your thumb and your hand kind of magically rises
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SPEAKER_00: because it's no longer carrying this heavy weight that's letting go
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SPEAKER_00: and i i do it periodically it always puts a smile on my face
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SPEAKER_00: and i get more humble i get more honest and i say okay there there it is
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SPEAKER_00: and i'm letting i'm letting go of that i don't control it and
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SPEAKER_00: so you know it is what it is so i'm just gonna have to adjust to that and work on me
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SPEAKER_01: i love this so much and it's such a simple exercise but it was funny i was in
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SPEAKER_01: a panel a few weeks ago and one of the in the panel she said surrender is
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SPEAKER_01: the only form of control and i went wow that's a bit powerful right because it's
10:06
SPEAKER_01: when we realize that sometimes we do need to let it go
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SPEAKER_01: and let it all you know someone said to me let it go and let it go to god
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SPEAKER_01: and i was like oh
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SPEAKER_01: i like that because sometimes circumstances are way beyond our control
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SPEAKER_01: and we can't see like you said we can't control all those little things around us we
10:24
SPEAKER_01: can't let them go
10:25
SPEAKER_00: well i i like that just as long
10:28
SPEAKER_00: as surrender doesn't mean giving up sometimes i think that's i mean that's
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SPEAKER_00: the first thing i i thought of when when you said that surrender i thought wait
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SPEAKER_03: a minute but surrendering and accepting accepting yes i completely giving up
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SPEAKER_03: and saying yes to everything or no to everything that that's not a solution
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SPEAKER_01: no and it's really important to be aligned with where your purpose is because
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SPEAKER_01: if you don't know where you're heading it makes it really hard to say yes and no
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SPEAKER_01: and i've done talks on this and everything because you know if you can't say yes
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SPEAKER_01: to yourself or say yes to what aligns for you really quickly then you get stuck
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SPEAKER_01: in this weird maybe energy and you get stuck on the in between
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SPEAKER_00: but people can very quickly pick up whether you're authentic you know whether you're
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SPEAKER_00: a genuine person and authenticity is really very much about alignment
11:34
SPEAKER_00: whether what you're saying is what you're doing
11:38
SPEAKER_00: when you meet somebody who's like that it's it's a pleasure it almost requires you
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SPEAKER_00: to smile when you're with them as opposed to kind
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SPEAKER_00: of tightening up pulling back maybe getting a frown going
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SPEAKER_00: because what they're saying is not what they're doing
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SPEAKER_00: there's not alignment with their values so these are choices this is this is
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SPEAKER_00: the power we have the power to design our own lives the power to be the author
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SPEAKER_03: of our own stories an amazing amount of power that we have and this is
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SPEAKER_03: the power that's part of this pathway the yellow brick road to thriving i love
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SPEAKER_01: that yellow brick road to thriving name of the episode there are willow trees along
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SPEAKER_01: the river yes of course
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SPEAKER_01: and i feel you bring up an important aspect with that too it's just you know
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SPEAKER_01: when we really show up authentically and we don't have the masks on and we can be
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SPEAKER_01: just ourselves there's a natural radiance that everything just feels lighter anyway
12:39
SPEAKER_01: because it's not like you're putting on this front to guard this part of you
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SPEAKER_01: that you don't want people to see and i so agree with you when you show up and meet
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SPEAKER_01: with people and they're authentic you do want to just hang around them you do want
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SPEAKER_01: to keep talking to them and it's contagious because you're like oh
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SPEAKER_01: this person's amazing
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SPEAKER_01: or you know this person's really doing what they are passionate about in the world
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SPEAKER_01: and it becomes an inspiration and i always get cranky at my clients i'm like that's
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SPEAKER_01: so inspiring i said but are you going to do something
13:08
SPEAKER_01: about it they're like no i said then i'm not inspiring you enough you have
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SPEAKER_01: to go do something and do the action as well
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SPEAKER_00: well and and and it doesn't have to be heavy so uh the great mother teresa said
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SPEAKER_00: the smile is the beginning of love so when you're
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SPEAKER_03: that person you're authentic you're you're you're you're you're dialed into
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SPEAKER_03: who you are and you're
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SPEAKER_03: you're comfortable with that and you're also working to be
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SPEAKER_03: a better person it's not like you're all you know just terrific
13:37
SPEAKER_03: a hundred percent right now you're you're good
13:40
SPEAKER_03: about all those things you've forgiven yourself you've forgiven others then
13:46
SPEAKER_03: it's easy to smile and when you smile it it just encourages other people
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SPEAKER_03: to smile i mean i'm i'm smiling a lot and people are smiling back and it's it's
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SPEAKER_03: a it's a beautiful thing and i think it's the beginning of love you know love in
14:00
SPEAKER_03: a not necessarily a romantic way but love in the sense
14:03
SPEAKER_03: of we're here we're here together yeah and you never know when
14:07
SPEAKER_01: a smile can just brighten somebody's day i genuinely smile at people just walking
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SPEAKER_01: through the shops and sometimes they're like
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SPEAKER_01: did that person smile do i know
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SPEAKER_01: that person right i'm just happy like just i'm just sharing my smile with you well
14:23
SPEAKER_03: since you mentioned happy i i do also want to help because you know words matter
14:29
SPEAKER_03: and sometimes we use a word when we
14:34
SPEAKER_03: people know what we mean but it's not very precise so there's two words that kind
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SPEAKER_03: of are used very often interchangeably one's joy and the other's happy and joy is
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SPEAKER_03: an internal thing and and it's long lasting uh it it comes from just a you know
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SPEAKER_03: as i say it's an internal thing
14:54
SPEAKER_03: that comes out i had this incredibly joyful experience a couple of months ago
15:00
SPEAKER_03: uh we were having a birthday party with my two-year-old granddaughter
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SPEAKER_03: and my wife brought a plate
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SPEAKER_03: of brownies these brownies are just catherine you you can't hardly eat just one
15:13
SPEAKER_03: so here's the the two candles
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SPEAKER_03: the plate of brownies and little kit takes the plate and offers them to everybody
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SPEAKER_03: to have take a brownie and i i look this is a two-year-old i looked at her
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SPEAKER_03: and said i'm very proud of you you are terrific
15:30
SPEAKER_03: and she looked she's sitting right next to me she insisted that she sit next to me
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SPEAKER_03: for a dip for a birthday dinner
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SPEAKER_03: and she said, Grandpa, I love you.
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SPEAKER_03: She gave me a kiss.
15:40
SPEAKER_03: Well, it's joy.
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SPEAKER_00: I'm getting I'm getting like teary eyed right now.
15:43
SPEAKER_00: It's joy.
15:44
SPEAKER_00: It's joy.
15:45
SPEAKER_00: Happiness is really important, too.
15:47
SPEAKER_00: But happiness is is more circumstantial.
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SPEAKER_03: It can be very short lived.
15:52
SPEAKER_03: It's like going out for a yummy dinner or seeing,
15:55
SPEAKER_03: you know, a movie or TV show that makes you laugh.
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SPEAKER_03: It can be a happy thing.
15:59
SPEAKER_03: But so so I think it's helpful to sort of think about it.
16:03
SPEAKER_03: you know what is giving me joy the internal things what are the things i'm doing out
16:08
SPEAKER_03: in the world that are making me happy i love that definition and i love
16:12
SPEAKER_01: the distinction you brought in there rand because it is happiness is fleeting
16:17
SPEAKER_01: whereas joy is that and you get those tears i call them tears of alignment you know
16:21
SPEAKER_01: when you just get those beautiful tears and say this is so beautiful and magical
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SPEAKER_01: and i just love it
16:28
SPEAKER_01: right and it can be it can be such a simple moment of your little two-year-old
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SPEAKER_01: and grandchild sharing the ground just just i love that age they're just so cheeky
16:39
SPEAKER_01: and challenging and fun
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SPEAKER_01: if you want to if you want to remember joy hang out
16:45
SPEAKER_01: with some children especially toddlers and preschoolers for nearly 20 years i worked
16:50
SPEAKER_01: with children so i fully understand how much joy and that they bring and
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SPEAKER_01: if you've forgotten your joy you know that can be a good place to kind of start
17:00
SPEAKER_01: to reconnect too but i know that
17:02
SPEAKER_01: you're passionate about helping people with relationships and coming back
17:05
SPEAKER_01: to themselves as much as i am but what do you find is some of the blocks
17:09
SPEAKER_01: that people have from getting that joy and having that joy yeah and
17:14
SPEAKER_00: and generally thriving you know so so we were just talking about words
17:19
SPEAKER_00: and words matter you know i i just invite your listeners to pay attention over
17:24
SPEAKER_03: the next couple of days next week we even write it down for example i'll give you
17:29
SPEAKER_03: a couple of examples are you saying i should that's a heaviness or
17:34
SPEAKER_03: or are you saying i could are you saying i have to you know almost introduces
17:40
SPEAKER_03: a frown i have to or are you saying i get to an
17:44
SPEAKER_03: opportunity raise the eyebrows beginning of a smile are you saying yes but which
17:50
SPEAKER_03: when you're talking to somebody which
17:52
SPEAKER_03: to me always feels like they haven't completely listened to what i'm talking about
17:56
SPEAKER_03: and and they're agreeing only with part of it and they're rejecting
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SPEAKER_03: a certain other part or are you saying yes
18:03
SPEAKER_03: which then softens the whole thing you're adding something in addition to what
18:08
SPEAKER_03: the other person said doesn't mean you're agreeing completely with what they have
18:12
SPEAKER_03: to say but you're just rounding it out and here's a big one talking
18:16
SPEAKER_03: about being overwhelmed
18:17
SPEAKER_03: we're living in a very time a lot of people just have way too many things
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SPEAKER_03: on their plate trying to get too many things done are you saying i'm busy
18:26
SPEAKER_03: or are you saying i'm delightfully scheduled
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SPEAKER_03: which indicates you're making some choices about what's going on in your calendar
18:34
SPEAKER_03: so that's words matter they inform how we think they inform a lot
18:39
SPEAKER_03: of our our behaviors i mentioned the voices the voices
18:43
SPEAKER_03: you know that that are in your head and they may have come
18:46
SPEAKER_03: from somebody else you have to look at those are those they may have been said
18:50
SPEAKER_03: to you at a time when somebody was trying to encourage you a teacher boss maybe
18:55
SPEAKER_03: a parent maybe they were they came from a place of love but they were also trying
19:00
SPEAKER_03: to protect you and maybe those kinds of voices don't represent
19:04
SPEAKER_03: the person you are today or the person you want to become so you have
19:07
SPEAKER_03: to just stop listening to those voices and instead of listening to yourself talk
19:12
SPEAKER_03: to yourself
19:13
SPEAKER_03: yeah i'm i'm i'm i'm on it i'm gonna i'm gonna keep working hard yes today's
19:18
SPEAKER_01: a beautiful day and i'm here yeah and i i love that you brought up the words
19:22
SPEAKER_01: because i can't remember what the chart is called but using words like i choose to
19:27
SPEAKER_01: or i desire to or i love to
19:30
SPEAKER_01: re-frames the whole thing you know or i get to do this for my family
19:33
SPEAKER_01: with mundane tasks right or i did like a 30 day what's your word challenge i think
19:39
SPEAKER_01: and one of them which was really interesting was i miss you now we say
19:43
SPEAKER_01: to people like i miss you
19:45
SPEAKER_01: and it's like well it's like sadness to it like i miss you you know and i'm in
19:50
SPEAKER_01: a longing and instead they say just say i'm looking forward
19:53
SPEAKER_01: to seeing you again i'm looking forward to talking to you again
19:57
SPEAKER_01: and i was like oh it does feel better right or instead of i can't afford
20:03
SPEAKER_01: that that's not a financial priority for me right now i was like yes i love that
20:09
SPEAKER_01: and it does take a lot of reframing and a
20:15
SPEAKER_01: thoughts in our head that sometimes we just need to observe them and not give them
20:20
SPEAKER_01: the power that we think they deserve as well
20:22
SPEAKER_03: well you know i i i believe it's very possible to uh design your own life it's
20:29
SPEAKER_03: a it's a big one of my big themes
20:30
SPEAKER_00: and you'll appreciate this i pull out my my double-decker bus
20:35
SPEAKER_00: and i say who's driving your bus are you on autopilot are you driving
20:40
SPEAKER_00: through fog is somebody else driving a bus but if you're driving your bus
20:45
SPEAKER_00: then you're deciding how fast to go you need to you need to be able to to say i want
20:50
SPEAKER_00: to slow down
20:51
SPEAKER_00: because you can otherwise get really overwhelmed or you can also decide when
20:56
SPEAKER_00: to stop that's a really that's a big choice no longer on the conveyor belt
21:01
SPEAKER_00: of life i'm stopping i'm taking care
21:03
SPEAKER_00: of myself self-care is very important you're making a decision about when
21:06
SPEAKER_00: when to turn right or turn left i mean life is full of transitions of one kind
21:11
SPEAKER_00: or another you're deciding who to invite on your bus while your bus starts off
21:17
SPEAKER_00: with people on it family and other people they're already on your bus
21:21
SPEAKER_00: so who else you adding on to your bus a new friend somebody else one
21:27
SPEAKER_00: of my dad's great gifts to me was have friends of all ages so
21:31
SPEAKER_00: that there are somebody's older than you are maybe by a fair amount
21:35
SPEAKER_00: and somebody's half your age
21:37
SPEAKER_00: you talk about children and who sometimes who to invite off your bus you don't want
21:42
SPEAKER_00: to be surrounded by toxic relationships you need
21:47
SPEAKER_00: to protect yourself set some boundaries and sometimes say hey there's a way
21:51
SPEAKER_00: to do that which is a kind way saying hey we've been friends for over 10 years
21:57
SPEAKER_00: and i want thank you
21:59
SPEAKER_00: for that we've had some really great conversations we've done a number
22:03
SPEAKER_00: of really good things together
22:04
SPEAKER_00: but i know we've drifted apart and i just want to wish you all the best
22:09
SPEAKER_00: and thank you for the relationship we have and so that's driving your own bus
22:14
SPEAKER_01: i love this analogy because i had someone say to me stop letting
22:18
SPEAKER_01: the self-saboteur drive your car tell it again in the back but i like the bus
22:22
SPEAKER_01: because you can fit more people in more people
22:26
SPEAKER_01: you can see more people and also the other side of that is that saying
22:29
SPEAKER_01: where people come into your life for a reason a season a cycle for a lifetime
22:34
SPEAKER_01: and i feel that's really redundant because sometimes we want to hold on
22:37
SPEAKER_01: to those friendships or hold on to those relationships even
22:40
SPEAKER_01: though we know like it's shifted or it's not the same anymore or we know it's toxic
22:45
SPEAKER_01: for us but we just get stuck in that loop
22:48
SPEAKER_00: yes a lot of fear people are driven a lot by anger and fear these are choices a lot
22:54
SPEAKER_00: of the the the whole thing about thriving is to make other choices to choose
22:59
SPEAKER_00: to be positive to choose to be courageous to choose to
23:03
SPEAKER_00: to take on life as a series of experiments kind of like being back in seventh
23:08
SPEAKER_00: or eighth grade where you had a science class and you know
23:11
SPEAKER_00: the experiment didn't work the first time so you had to tweak it you had to fiddle
23:16
SPEAKER_00: with it maybe it never worked that's life that is life to just accept that
23:20
SPEAKER_00: the life is a series of experiments and just move forward keep moving forward
23:25
SPEAKER_01: yeah and i guess not get stuck in the failure
23:28
SPEAKER_01: because you know failures can be our greatest learning and teaching moments
23:32
SPEAKER_01: and can be expansive at the same time it's when you get stuck in that loop of that
23:37
SPEAKER_01: oh no i i should have done it better or you know yeah that's when we get stuck in
23:43
SPEAKER_00: that loop and learn from a mistake take the time to sort it out what happened
23:49
SPEAKER_00: and what role did you play in it what what's the takeaway lesson
23:53
SPEAKER_00: so you you become stronger and you don't want to repeat a mistake so learn
23:58
SPEAKER_00: from it yeah
23:59
SPEAKER_01: a hundred percent and as we start to finish our time together rand i asked
24:03
SPEAKER_01: the guests that come on the show if he could heal or change something in
24:07
SPEAKER_00: the world what would it be well i i would like people to get
24:12
SPEAKER_03: to know themselves better get more acquainted with who they are what they stand
24:17
SPEAKER_03: for what they don't stand for just it is and it needs to be done more than just one
24:23
SPEAKER_03: in a lifetime it needs to be done periodically it might help
24:27
SPEAKER_03: to journal you know especially when i'm a little confused
24:30
SPEAKER_03: and things aren't just going a hundred percent i you know i i write down on a piece
24:35
SPEAKER_03: of paper there's a neuroscience about you know the writing
24:38
SPEAKER_03: things down not using a piece of
24:54
SPEAKER_03: clear about this so treat yourself to to knowing who you are and
24:59
SPEAKER_03: from there just beep be courageous take ex take some chances take some risks
25:05
SPEAKER_03: to do some experimenting find some people who are aligned with with who you are and
25:10
SPEAKER_03: who supports you and who who appreciate you for the person you are and
25:16
SPEAKER_03: the person you're trying to be i want to i want to share my my dad passed away over
25:22
SPEAKER_03: a little over a year ago
25:23
SPEAKER_00: at 102 and it fell on on my shoulders as the trustee to go to
25:29
SPEAKER_00: the house clean it up get it ready for sale and i came to his desk a lot of papers
25:35
SPEAKER_00: and i came across two index cards and if i if i may catherine i'd like
25:40
SPEAKER_00: to read these two cards please do please
25:44
SPEAKER_00: in every person's life there are two wolves fighting one of joy love and happiness
25:50
SPEAKER_00: and one of anger hate and greed which wolf wins the one you feed and
25:55
SPEAKER_00: the other one is work like you don't need
25:58
SPEAKER_00: the money love like no one has ever hurt you dance like nobody is watching sing like
26:04
SPEAKER_00: nobody is listening and live as if this was paradise on earth what magic to find
26:10
SPEAKER_00: on your father's desk another gift thanks dad
26:13
SPEAKER_01: leaving you messages from the other side i love it yeah it's good and if people want
26:17
SPEAKER_01: to come and find you rand or come and get a book where are the best places
26:22
SPEAKER_00: that they can come and check you out well uh so i invite everybody to go to
26:27
SPEAKER_00: the book website which is www.randsalig.com and there's a lot of information
26:33
SPEAKER_00: about me about the books and unbelievable testimonials there's i also did
26:37
SPEAKER_00: the audiobook
26:39
SPEAKER_00: so on that website are things for the audio listener because when i did
26:45
SPEAKER_00: the audio i didn't read all the 75 paragraphs about books i recommend
26:51
SPEAKER_03: that really impacted me but it's there on the website of course it's in the back of
26:56
SPEAKER_00: the the print book as well you can get the book everywhere it's
27:01
SPEAKER_00: an award-winning book it's very popular you can go to amazon.com
27:06
SPEAKER_03: but all the independent stores as well.
27:09
SPEAKER_01: Amazing, and thank you so much for sharing Rand
27:12
SPEAKER_01: and bringing your joyful energy into this conversation.
27:16
SPEAKER_01: If anyone is curious, please go check out Rand's work
27:18
SPEAKER_01: get his book
27:19
SPEAKER_01: And if you enjoyed this episode
27:21
SPEAKER_01: Please feel free to like, share or subscribe
27:23
SPEAKER_01: and check out the show notes below
27:24
SPEAKER_01: So Rand, thank you very much for this conversation
27:27
SPEAKER_00: Catherine, it has been a pleasure
27:28
SPEAKER_00: You are a delight to be with
27:30
SPEAKER_01: Thank you so many
27:32
SPEAKER_02: my virtual obsession my romantic thriller is now available on amazon
27:37
SPEAKER_02: and other online retailers this book explores the intersection of loneliness love
27:42
SPEAKER_02: and how chasing perfection through technology can lead to fantasy
27:46
SPEAKER_02: and reality colliding my virtual obsession out now hey beautiful souls i wanted
27:52
SPEAKER_02: to have a chat with you about a really amazing
27:55
SPEAKER_02: cacao that i drink to help me get in ceremony to help me ground but also just
28:00
SPEAKER_02: because it tastes freaking good so if you're curious and want to know
28:03
SPEAKER_02: about drinking something other than coffee
28:05
SPEAKER_02: or your standard tea why not check out creation cacao i love this with a bit
28:11
SPEAKER_02: of honey and cinnamon sprinkled in and just letting it brew and having
28:17
SPEAKER_02: that whole intention as you create this cup
28:20
SPEAKER_02: so if you're curious if i want to know more check out the link in the show notes and enjoy
28:27
SPEAKER_02: Thank you for listening to Willow Healing Matters, the podcast.
28:30
SPEAKER_02: We have so much love and gratitude that you are taking
28:32
SPEAKER_02: the time out of your day to empower you on your healing journey.
28:37
SPEAKER_02: The views shared by the person being interviewed
28:39
SPEAKER_02: might not necessarily reflect that of the host
28:42
SPEAKER_02: and should be used in your own discernment.
28:44
SPEAKER_02: Trust what resonates with you
28:46
SPEAKER_02: and follow your heart and soul guidance.
28:48
SPEAKER_02: If you have any underlying medical conditions or mental health
28:53
SPEAKER_02: please consult with your health care provider before pursuing any of
28:56
SPEAKER_02: the recommendations likewise you can always contact the person being interviewed
29:02
SPEAKER_02: to find out more information this can be found in the show note remember
29:05
SPEAKER_02: to activate align heal empower and find love in everything that you do