Latest / Real Deal Media / Late Night Thoughts 'Tomorrow Has No Closure'

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Late Night Thoughts 'Tomorrow Has No Closure' · Real Deal Media

0:28
None. None.
2:26
Look around and have a beautiful love and the upper side down and
2:30
the inside of the out of the grill won't be swamped and loud
2:41
streaming and you won't see that sound.
2:52
Tomorrow. Right.
4:07
Isn't that lovely? Welcome, everybody.
4:11
Welcome to a members only kind of affair here tonight.
4:16
Late night thoughts as you saw right there.
4:18
Yes, it is for members only for the night owls right here in the
4:21
night owls lounge. You know, I'm renovating the
4:24
entire lounge. I don't know if you've noticed
4:27
and I hope to God you can hear me.
4:30
Oh my luck. Renovating the lounge, working
4:34
on the interiors, the carpets, the insulation and the wet bar
4:43
too. Yes, you kind of have bar and
4:46
there's nothing worse than a dry bar and we certainly have lived
4:49
with those overtime. Tonight is a a an off.
4:54
I shouldn't say off anything but a a rare occasion here as a late
5:00
night thoughts is a members only kind of show.
5:04
But tonight I had to call an audible because I am, I have to
5:12
admit I'm devastated. I am absolutely devastated, as
5:19
you might have. Seen or heard or or could tell
5:22
last night. The passing of Matthew Short has
5:28
truly it's really traumatized me, certainly in in addition to
5:35
what I found out today about my my friend who is no longer here.
5:43
He died in what we were told was a house fire.
5:47
I I was told today in greater detail that he.
5:52
'Cause you know, we were kind of saying or.
5:54
Trying to figure out. How did he die in the house
5:56
fire? I mean, was he trapped in there?
5:58
Was somebody, you know? And course, 'cause we're in the
6:01
conspiratorial realms of, of, of life.
6:03
Around here, you know, everyone has that mind, you know, So
6:05
someone said they took him out or this, you know, or maybe he
6:11
was, you know, he uncovered something.
6:14
But I, I have to, you know, put those rumors to rest now he.
6:20
It was told to me it. Started in the kitchen so you
6:23
know, it was a grease fire in the kitchen.
6:27
He fell asleep and didn't know any better and where he lives
6:31
and I've been to his house. It it is.
6:34
His mother's home and it's in the woodsy area, so it he was
6:39
trapped in there like a like a tinderbox.
6:44
And it's been haunting me since I found this out.
6:48
But today in particular, it has traumatized me to the core and
6:52
has opened a Pandora's box of emotions and feelings of that
6:58
I've been bottling up for the past almost four years now of
7:05
what has happened since Matt's been gone.
7:10
And, and I, I have been so detached from Matt for such a
7:16
long time. I I was speaking to our our
7:19
mutual friend Reid. Who?
7:22
Just got out of jail. I didn't even know he was in
7:24
jail, but. And I asked, well, how is the
7:26
mother OK, you know, how's his mom doing?
7:29
And then he told me no, Dean, she doesn't live there anymore,
7:33
like. What?
7:34
She's in a nursing home. Are you kidding me?
7:39
So. There's all these.
7:40
Things and you know, that's why we we I had to pull an audible
7:45
and after just getting here, I had to do a late night thoughts.
7:50
I didn't want to be doing a after hours like I usually do in
7:55
these occasions where it's a similar format to late night
8:00
thoughts, which is we talk about everything and nothing at all.
8:02
And that's the mono. But it's kind of a private
8:05
affair and there's a lot of things I wanted to say last
8:08
night I I just couldn't. Because it it was a.
8:11
A general public kind of a show and I I just didn't know where
8:17
to step here and I I want to trace things back at some point
8:23
here to how we got here because there's a lot of new people that
8:27
may not know the history of real deal media and myself for that
8:32
fact. And and if you're slightly
8:36
interested, I I can only tell you to buckle up and prepare for
8:41
a race for impact is all I can say.
8:44
But to the core, because my feelings about Madden and
8:52
whatever took place between us, which I will assess is almost to
8:57
the side. Because the thought of my dear
8:59
friend surrounded by fire, engulfing his family's home that
9:08
his father built with him by hand is the most horrific way to
9:16
die I can possibly imagine. And it hit me.
9:22
It, it's hitting me hard. It hit me hard.
9:24
Today. And it's open a fluttering.
9:28
Just a gate of. Fluttering emotions and and if
9:33
you're counting to date, this is the second real deal media cast
9:37
mate we have lost since we've been doing this.
9:41
We lost Tim McLeod in January of 2022, and now we've lost Matt
9:50
Short, and that just dawned on me too, moments ago, before the
9:54
show started, and I have. Since 2022 and around that time
10:01
early on. I have dealt with things in an
10:07
avalanche of things a lot of people don't know about and a
10:11
lot of people don't really have to deal with in a lifetime, and
10:15
I have. Bottled it up for SO.
10:17
Long and put it into my my work ethic and have been a workhorse
10:26
really since 2020, but. Particularly the year of 2022.
10:32
When a coup d'etat on myself took place like I've never seen
10:37
before and I I can't even explain what happened and how it
10:42
went down with without, you know, getting just perplexed of
10:46
why is this happening. And I've been bottling things up
10:50
and even my friendship with Match, which existed longer than
10:58
the amount of time we were doing shows here on this network.
11:03
And when you take that into account, we had a great
11:08
friendship and it was a friendship of adventure, a
11:11
friendship of just, you know, being free and traveling and
11:18
experiencing just supernova heights constantly.
11:22
You know, that he never even dreamed of because he's, he was
11:24
just a, a, you know, just a middle, lower middle class kid
11:29
from the middle of nowhere, Missouri, Branson, MO, who had a
11:33
chance to, you know, stand next to some big, big time shoulders
11:40
there in the showbiz worlds and media worlds in general.
11:43
And it was a dream as well as it has been for me.
11:47
And, and it is now it's hit me finally that I have lost.
11:55
It didn't hit me last night. It's the shock of everything
12:00
and, and and also the anger too, of, of being attacked by the
12:03
same guy. It's almost like I was telling
12:06
somebody. And it's probably the worst
12:07
analogy, but it's like when O GS kids witnessed their dad getting
12:15
acquitted for murder. They were like, yes, our dad's
12:18
not going to prison for the rest of his life.
12:20
Then they're like, but wait a minute, our dad killed her
12:22
mother. You know what I mean?
12:22
It's like there's all these things because for the last
12:27
three years, Matthew Short has been like a serial killer style.
12:35
Kind of a, a taunting, derelict, degenerate person to me.
12:42
And, and it didn't dawn on me why that was or how that got to
12:47
that point until today as well. Because again, in this might
12:51
been a a mechanism my whole life is when the going gets tough and
12:56
when a problem comes along, I I don't whip it.
12:58
I just go the other. Way and start working harder and
13:01
start editing and getting into the just fold of trying to
13:05
better everything I do here so. Yes.
13:12
So for the past three years I have.
13:16
Received text messages from him and and could.
13:19
Be other people. Close to him about how they're
13:23
going to come over to my doorstep they're going to I'm
13:26
going to be taught a lesson for you know what I did to to
13:31
produce you know the people that were here or a woman who said
13:37
but she's a legitimate stalker who is going around to everybody
13:41
saying I was sex trafficking her and and I've never met this
13:46
woman before and this is a woman has she's done this to multiple
13:51
people she's doing it now we found out even she's been 5150.
13:56
The psychiatric holds get this 27 times.
14:00
So yeah. And that woman's still around.
14:02
But anyways, Matt has been a just just a belligerent drunk
14:13
and and I think it's the alcohol that really got him in the end
14:17
because of the fire and every major thing in his life that
14:22
went into a downward spiral. Any you know, he's wrecked cars
14:26
before friends. He's he's wrecked work trucks,
14:32
you know, couldn't couldn't really hold that that steady
14:35
high positions of jobs for for, you know, behavioral conflicts
14:41
and such. And it's always been the
14:43
alcohol. And what angers me is that there
14:47
is friends now coming out of the woodworks on his end that are
14:51
all grieving people. I know very well and the
14:54
funerals and everybody's come together and I'm not allowed in
14:57
that circle. I'm an outdoor alley cat looking
15:02
in. At All the People.
15:03
Grieving and I'm not there because my character has been
15:06
assassinated for the last three years like I've never seen
15:11
before from any friend of mine of of that close and that
15:15
nature. But then again, there's been
15:19
some people around here. It's just it goes.
15:22
It kind of goes back to Reeve. I've witnessed casualties of
15:27
fame. Casualties of fame to be cliche
15:32
people I used to know before a lot of the the notoriety that
15:38
completely changed when that came along into their baskets,
15:43
you know, they completely change.
15:46
So anyways, so I've been dealing with a lot of just thuggish
15:52
type. Of communications falsehoods,
15:57
even as. Recently, as when Cagney, if you
16:02
recall that person here who turned out to be nothing, she
16:07
said she was to the umpteenth. You know, power wasn't even a
16:16
cop. We found out.
16:17
I mean, that's how tragic it is. And and then found out the woman
16:21
was pinning other people like the three, two other strong
16:25
women personalities around here, pinning people against each
16:28
other to corral me, to control me and got caught and then went
16:35
scorched earth. And when people go scorched
16:37
earth around here in the past three years, they run to Matt
16:40
short for for, you know, some kind of safety, for vindication.
16:48
And also to feed him a bowl of lies, to make him the.
16:51
Attack dog to. Take me down.
16:54
So anyways, So what happened was in 2022, I came into that that
17:03
year with high hopes of everything.
17:06
We had a great, great cast. I mean, at the height we had 12
17:09
people here and we had a stalker come around who I just, you
17:15
know, this woman, I, I couldn't, I couldn't shake her.
17:19
She wouldn't stop. I mean, every.
17:20
So she penetrated the circles around here, the infiltrated the
17:24
circles. Got close to everybody.
17:26
Else and then made her move. Now Kristen is the catalyst.
17:33
She ran to Matt. She had a conflict with with
17:37
being here and it's like the girlfriend you're dating and
17:40
you're so nice. She doesn't know how to break
17:42
up. With you so she.
17:43
Finds little reasons and and then uses that.
17:46
And that's exactly what she did. And we all know that story.
17:50
And she runs to Matt, You know, Matt's still here.
17:56
Then the stalker thing comes. She teams up with Guru, who was
18:00
our Australian correspondent at that time.
18:04
I had to get rid of him. He was doing amphetamines to the
18:08
point of huge, huge personality changes.
18:12
Never showed up. And you.
18:13
Yeah. So he had a drug problem and
18:17
amongst many other problems. But he, he tried to do a, he
18:22
became like Gloria Allred and he was going to have his Harvey
18:24
Weinstein moment on me. And it just didn't work.
18:27
It fell flat on his face, but it didn't fall flat on other
18:31
people's faces who were still here plotting against me in case
18:36
their demise or, you know, came into play.
18:39
They were going to make it my demise so.
18:44
With. Guru.
18:46
What happened to me is what happened to Matt and I finally
18:48
figured it out today. So if you don't know, there was
18:51
a Christmas special in 21 and I that I was doing and I have AI
18:57
had a file transfer folder that I was putting all of our all my
19:03
files in that I used for the show at that time.
19:05
And every time I was doing it as we were about to showcase for
19:09
that night, the files kept disappearing.
19:12
I said what the Hell's going on? And I would put one in there and
19:15
I said 10 seconds, it's deleted. And I said to Lisa Duffy, my
19:21
producer at that time really didn't produce much.
19:25
It was me. But, you know, let's we can play
19:27
along. And she said it was.
19:30
Mel, which was the wife of Guru at that time.
19:33
And I said, how could these people do it?
19:34
And she said, yeah, they're doing it.
19:36
So Lisa convinced me and by. All.
19:41
Means nobody was thinking otherwise, that it was not those
19:46
people deleting my files for our big New Year's Eve special and
19:52
and I was she framed them so I can attack them because she had
19:57
a problem with the wife at that time.
19:59
Unbeknownst to me, it was so diabolical that she framed them
20:06
where at that time. Nobody was if it's not even the
20:09
lexicon that somebody could be that evil and diabolical and
20:13
and. Totally like a a sleuth to.
20:18
Then get me the main guy to go on air to attack people.
20:23
Who were pretty, pretty bad. For you know, the most part, but
20:26
certainly we're not deleting files in seconds flat when it
20:30
was the woman from Scotland doing it.
20:33
But I didn't know that it that took me years to figure out
20:36
later. That that went down when I just
20:39
said, you know what? Fast forward.
20:44
So Matt leaves because so he doesn't leave.
20:47
I tell him to leave in April of 22 because he comes drunk on air
20:52
as we had Peggy Hall and he bamboozled the show on purpose
20:56
because of. The information he was receiving
20:59
from Krista Megan who? She doesn't fight on the stage,
21:03
she fights in the dark alleys, she fights behind your back and
21:06
she blackballs you. That's how she does it.
21:08
It's so dirty. And she coordinated with the
21:11
very stalker, the psychotic. Woman to take me down and
21:17
coordinated with, you know, was telling Matt who was taking
21:19
notes very compelling too. And he had a lot of respect.
21:23
You know, not once did he call me and you know, we've been
21:27
through that. So that happened.
21:29
Then I tell him he has to. Go.
21:31
He can't. Be drunk on air like that and it
21:33
was so bad and he so he goes. He goes.
21:36
Now when Lisa leaves later that year, that's when she turned up
21:44
the volume and goes to Matt and weaponizes Matt, who over time I
21:51
started realizing that there's something wrong with him
21:54
mentally and a lot of the other people.
21:59
Around. But nobody was saying anything.
22:02
Nobody ever said to him, hey. You should probably hold.
22:05
Off on your your drinking or nobody ever said to him hey you
22:10
might have a little bit of dementia because of excessive
22:13
drinking or and or other things you're repeating yourself quite
22:17
often you're having a lot of issues we're here for you we.
22:22
Want to get you? Nobody said that.
22:24
And the one guy that did me. He took issue with and, you
22:30
know, I had to rid him. And the same with Kristen.
22:34
You know, she had a personality problem, a huge narcissistic ego
22:39
problem that, you know, we had someone who was here whose
22:43
husband died. And so we have a new, we have a
22:46
anniversary show and then a party show the next following
22:49
week. Kristen felt the need to do
22:51
eulogies. For the for Danielle's husband.
22:55
Two consecutive weeks in a row. And I said this is not well
22:58
because this woman's crying. I had to approach Kristen.
23:02
Very friendly as a producer. It's my job about this, you
23:06
know, like, you know, maybe we should do this next time.
23:08
And oh, you would have. You would have thought that I
23:11
was asking her. To.
23:13
Go hide in a closet and never come out again.
23:16
And you know how? Horrible she is.
23:18
And she didn't take it, and that's when she bolted too.
23:21
But then again, that was her. That was her ticket to ride to
23:25
get the hell out. Because she was going to be the
23:27
next it girl, the next Connie Chung.
23:30
You know that she was going to be on what was that OAN network?
23:36
And I know that because she was telling me she is.
23:39
And she said, Dean, don't you want bigger things in life?
23:42
Don't you want to have a house? Don't you want a nice?
23:45
Car. Well, then you should be like me
23:49
because I know the Frontline Doctors and I'm friends with
23:53
people in very high places. Like really.
23:58
Well, I'm, I'm friends with people in all places anyways.
24:04
So, So yeah, when Lisa goes, they go to him, they weaponize
24:07
him. So now I haven't.
24:09
I have at that point at the end of 2022.
24:13
There, this is what was this was the plan, Lisa.
24:18
Had. Concocted a dead man's keys kind
24:23
of thing a a last minute resort if things were to go awry and
24:28
they can't control me. They she bought a website to to
24:35
start a new show. It's called Curious Case Files,
24:39
whatever which I I. Couldn't understand why they
24:43
were like waiting and postponing it on and on and on and on
24:46
because that was going to be the platform.
24:50
They were going to do a takedown series on me using what they
24:56
thought was credible evidence from the stalker and Matt
25:00
himself, who is now. All.
25:01
And all participating in only to find out that never existed.
25:08
In fact, when Matt was doing who decided to do his live streams
25:11
on me, which he wanted to do right away after I confronted
25:14
him about his drinking. The first thing he said to me is
25:18
F you and followed by dot dot dot.
25:21
I'm going to have a lot of fun doing live streams on you.
25:27
I said what kind of? Derelict is this.
25:30
But at that time, Kristen had got to him.
25:34
And so now this was the plan. So this was a coup d'etat.
25:38
So it was like 10 people or whatever, and they're friends
25:41
versus me versus me. And rather than me waiting and
25:50
just playing defense and denying, no, I went into the
25:52
offense mode. And that's how you win things.
25:54
So. So that's the kind of recent
25:58
history that we had. And it was tumultuous.
26:02
It was one of the toughest times in my life.
26:05
It was one of the most hurtful times in my life.
26:07
To have people who I, you know, who I had great, great respect
26:14
for, to have them betray me and be fame casualties.
26:22
And some of them, some of them I'm not sure they're just fame
26:27
casualties as opposed and versus Intel OP people, not even
26:34
necessarily just Intel agencies, but it could be private people
26:38
connected to XY and Z that pay people online to go shake things
26:43
up, distract. It happens all the time.
26:47
Back. Then I didn't really know or
26:48
understand it, but now I do because back in 2022, as we know
26:53
now, I felt it. I couldn't prove it, but I've
26:56
been now confirmed and I'll do a longer piece at some point on
27:02
and I have now I'm considered by law enforcement APOI and I'm
27:08
like you sure not POS is typo. No POI person of interest.
27:12
I have been monitored heavily since 2022, I believe in 2020
27:18
when I was doing the show in that red room, if you recall, in
27:21
Huntington Beach. I believe there was FB is in my
27:25
Airbnb at that time in the multiple room complex I was in,
27:29
there was one next to me and I I believe there was 2 just across
27:33
the hallway from me. And for some reason I was like,
27:38
I'm cool with that. And I OK, they're going to see
27:40
that things are a little different than they probably
27:44
thought because. They thought it was dangerous.
27:45
So I'm considered like armed and dangerous person of interest
27:48
person that needs extra shadow banning and, and, and a little
27:52
bit on the side, you know. So all this goes.
27:56
Down and I tell you it was there was no love loss at that point.
28:04
And so I didn't like, you know, I wasn't like, oh, I miss these
28:07
people. Oh, OK, no, I just worked, put
28:11
my head down and worked. And that's how I dealt with it.
28:13
That's how I dealt with it. So since then, you know, the
28:20
2023 happens in 24 and all these things and, and and I didn't
28:24
think about any of this. I was on the bigger and better
28:28
things of my own objectives and my own goals than I wanted to
28:31
complete. You know, my, my legacy of, of
28:36
work, if you will. And I just didn't think about
28:40
this, even though I was getting, you know, time to time, you
28:44
know? Hey, you better watch.
28:46
Oh hey, where you going? You know, taunting and all this
28:49
stuff. Egging me on.
28:51
Before a public. War and that that's kind of what
28:53
Matt did. I think, you know, he thinks
28:54
it's funny. He did it with somebody else a
28:57
long time ago and this was his thing because, you know, he
28:59
didn't have a show anymore. Then his YouTube channel gets
29:04
deleted, cancelled by YouTube. He blames me, you know, he
29:10
didn't think that. Well, wait a minute.
29:12
I. Have a lot of.
29:13
You know, content on here with firearms this and that and and
29:17
that might not raise a red flag here on the very censored
29:21
YouTube. No, it it's me, me, me I because
29:24
I've been built up as the straw man by very strong willed
29:30
personalities of of of women around here, RDM women and and
29:37
if, if. Lisa's argument and and
29:42
weaponization of Matt was as compelling as it was when she
29:46
did it to me then. I could fully understand now.
29:50
Clearly what what happened? Because it didn't really dawn on
29:53
me just until recently about how this happened, why this
29:58
happened, Because. Because there's no answers of
30:01
why. I even spoke to our friend today
30:03
and he said, yeah, he and I said when I spoke to Matt about what
30:06
what what's he doing and why he's doing, he goes, he said it
30:09
didn't make sense. It did not make sense why he's
30:11
doing it. But when you do it like that and
30:14
like Matt, you know, he's got some interesting hombres around
30:18
him over there. And some of them just they
30:20
already hate me because a lot of them are from Texas and they
30:24
already hate me because I'm from California.
30:26
California and Californians in general are very and highly
30:30
unpopular in throughout the state of Texas because a lot of
30:34
them have moved there and are trying to change things.
30:39
And I would say, you know, but what what often gets discounted
30:43
is that a lot of conservative Californians.
30:48
And bring their business to Texas and their money.
30:50
So it's not a black and white thing.
30:53
And I don't know how many times I had to keep telling people in
30:56
Texas or particularly Matt, who kept promoting me as his
31:00
Hollywood friend, which I really had.
31:03
Great disdain for I didn't. I said I'm from Orange County,
31:07
that you couldn't be any more different.
31:09
It's as different as being from Buffalo, NY versus being from
31:13
Manhattan. It's as different as being from.
31:17
Liverpool, England versus being from London in Notting Hill area
31:24
to be exact. You know, and it's just not me.
31:29
I mean, you know, it's not who who I am, but but you know,
31:34
group think and gang mentality. It's a dangerous thing, you
31:38
know, and I had, I had people connected to Matt wanting to
31:42
fight me. Who I've.
31:43
Who have maybe met one time. Twice or they heard.
31:46
About me. They want to fight me online.
31:50
For for what? Reason, you know.
31:56
So I've divorced any and all. Feelings I've had, you know, for
32:04
for Matt as a friend, you know, before all all that decade we,
32:08
you know, spent together in. You know, what is it?
32:12
The 2000 teens, I don't even know what they call that decade.
32:14
But yeah, I had completely forgot about it, shut it out and
32:20
wrote it off. You know, like it's a tax write
32:22
off or whatever. And and then this happens and.
32:33
You would think. That.
32:36
I would be, you know, relieved on some level, but I'm, I'm
32:40
totally not. I'm not OK.
32:41
I'm not OK. Because on one hand, like I was
32:46
sharing, I received a message from what I now know as his new
32:51
girlfriend who I didn't know about, who messages me two
32:54
paragraphs. I won't even repeat what she
32:56
said, which is really a recycled talking points from three years
33:01
ago where his mind still is was, I should say, you know, all
33:09
these things of. How do you, what all you do is
33:12
using other people's work. You know, there's that line
33:15
which came from Lisa, cause Lisa had, you know, the, the viewers
33:19
fooled that she did all the work here.
33:21
And a lot of people soon figured out in the the season of 2023
33:26
that, no, it's really me that does the graphics and the
33:28
editing and everything. But but she was selling it like
33:32
Oh no, it was hers evil. And so, so so yeah, so fast for
33:42
now. Here we are this week.
33:43
And I get that. And I said, who in the?
33:45
World is this. I didn't think it was her or I
33:48
mean, I didn't think this was a legitimate person.
33:50
See, because actively right now, we currently, we have a wild
33:55
troll of sorts that is currently going after Jim Fetzer, who is
34:01
about to have his Sandy Hook case overturned.
34:05
It's it's going to be pretty wild, everybody.
34:07
It's pretty, pretty wild. And when doing so, they send
34:11
heretics after you to damn your name and your credibility,
34:16
integrity and to gain your attention.
34:19
To destroy you. Within that's what they're
34:22
trying to do with Jim with that paid show.
34:26
And I know all the things that come with it because that's
34:29
happened to me. It's happened to me multiple
34:31
times, even to the point of it just doesn't happen from afar.
34:35
I say no, you want to join real deal media, you know, I mean,
34:38
that's how gullible I've been. That's how trusting I've been,
34:42
and it's how focused I've been into what I'm doing to the point
34:48
that's all I'm interested in and I can't people manage and
34:52
definitely not a great adult babysitter in in that field.
34:56
It's not my interest. It's, I mean, I can do it, but
35:00
it's my interest is what you see in.
35:02
Everything I, I've, I've done and and doing so yeah.
35:08
So, you know, so it's a mixed bag.
35:11
It's a mixed bag. But it really it, it just nearly
35:14
killed me today hearing about the way that Matt died because
35:20
it made me think of the times that that we weren't interfered
35:27
with as two people, two guys that are experiencing life
35:34
through different adventures and, and what have you
35:36
experiences those years, the years that I pushed away because
35:44
I I had moved on. But to to realize that Matt was
35:50
his house is burned. He was burned alive is the most
35:56
painstaking ending you can have to this.
35:59
But also a moment of realization that I have not dealt with a lot
36:06
of the anguish and pain and a lot of pain that I have hidden
36:12
and tucked away doing this here thing here real deal media with
36:17
with some of the most greatest betrayals I've ever seen in my
36:20
life. And I have not dealt with it
36:26
kind of like people that just never sweat, you know, it's just
36:30
they're, they're constantly in a, a room temperature atmosphere
36:34
and. That that could be highly.
36:36
And very unhealthy and it and it is.
36:40
And I don't know if, you know, I feel comfortable.
36:42
I mean, I'll tell you one of the greatest humbling and very
36:48
comforting takeaways is that there are some people who are
36:53
here and have been here watching and members are not that have
36:58
been here for five years, four years, you know, 3 and are still
37:04
here. And I, I cannot tell you what
37:06
that means to me because I, I, when I'm not in my cubby hole
37:12
editing and I look out and I'm dealing with what I'm dealing
37:15
with now. You can feel so alone.
37:19
And, you know, the fact that Matt's son is is hurting and he
37:27
wrote something incredible on his base football, but the fact
37:33
that he's hurting, he's hurting right now and he's lost his dad.
37:38
He feels robbed. He feels he's confused.
37:41
Nobody believes it. And I know that, you know, I
37:43
know this boy and, and his other daughter and, and a lot of the
37:49
friends and it, and I can't, you know, I'm not allowed to be
37:51
there because my name is good as mud.
37:53
It, it, it is the most disheartening thing.
37:56
So, you know, that's what I'm dealing with.
37:59
And, and I wondered, now I'm wondering if when he reached out
38:05
to me for the Saint Patrick's Day weekend, even though it was
38:09
a drunk Tex, I wonder if that was a kind of a lifeline, an
38:16
olive branch in his own way. And it's hard to tell.
38:20
It's hard. I mean, it could have been very
38:22
well been. But like I was saying last
38:25
night, you know, in the the closing segments of last night's
38:30
show is to to think that his last thoughts, at least from
38:37
that week or, you know, this time period, his thoughts were
38:40
that I was the reason that he's no longer doing media and his,
38:46
you know, just, you know, his life has just not been well, it
38:52
it's a it's such a hurtful. Kind of thing to think, 'cause
38:56
I've only ever done the opposite of that.
38:58
And I say that too, because I believe it was one of our
39:03
members that that shared with me they found Matt's last.
39:05
Interview literally a week ago on the Shepard and Bella's show,
39:10
which I, I didn't know about and, but I heard some of the
39:14
excerpts from it and I'll listen more to it.
39:18
And it is the voice of a man that is not the same Matt that
39:24
we remember, but a very defeated one who is almost like who's
39:29
sounding, from what I understand, as a man who was
39:33
ready to hang it up and kind of just waving the white flag and
39:38
giving up. And that's hurtful too.
39:40
I mean, I'm feel sad for that too.
39:42
Because it didn't have to happen this way, and it happened this
39:45
way because of my my. Apathetic way that allowed, you
39:59
know, the the foxes to run the hen house on my apathetic way to
40:05
allow people like Christian, you know, to just run amok and.
40:10
You know, not set a rule of, of, of ethics and stand up for
40:14
what's right that I let other people walk all over me and
40:18
others and I didn't take a stand for what's right within I, I, I
40:25
do. It, you know, on the shows and
40:27
without, but I wasn't looking at my own backyard in my own living
40:33
room of the very serious problems because I can't, you
40:38
know, you can't see. The forest through the trees.
40:41
You can't see when you're in the.
40:42
Eye of the Hurricane. You know, I, I didn't know,
40:46
like, you know, a lot of people are just placating me.
40:48
It didn't feel like that at the time because I'm so focused on,
40:51
you know, the what's it going, what's being transmitted out
40:53
there? And it wound up biting me in in
40:57
the end and just. Like Matt's alcohol bit him in
41:02
the end, you know, for for. Usually a guy who's a
41:07
survivalist probably would have smelt of the smoke and ran or
41:10
probably would have never forgotten to leave a stove on.
41:12
I mean, and now he's now he's, you know, it's, it's surreal.
41:19
It's surreal to me. So I, I wanted to say that and I
41:23
wanted to, you know, share some great things here, but I want to
41:26
take this I. Want to take?
41:29
This great break. Quick break.
41:32
Because I am traumatized today, everybody, I mean, to learn some
41:36
of you're so close to for so long to find out that they
41:40
burned alive is is eating me away.
41:42
But I'm going to take a quick break.
41:44
I'm going to get some water. And I want to tell you some
41:47
incredible stories and I want to talk about some of the acolytes
41:50
that were achieved in this in this time is I'm I'm really
41:54
coming clean about what's going on here.
41:56
And if you're new again, if you're new at this, and maybe
41:59
it's hard to understand, but it was an avalanche of things that
42:03
it's almost like what Donald Trump was going through, you
42:05
know, and that Russia collusion, But I'm certainly not at that
42:09
stage yet. Anyways, you're watching late
42:13
night thoughts here on Real Deal Media's members only.
42:16
We'll be back after this quick break.
42:53
Goodbye. The.
44:14
All right, welcome back. Welcome back to late night
44:16
thoughts. Late night thoughts here,
44:18
members only. I am still Dean Ryan here as
44:22
I'm. Yeah, I was trying to color.
44:26
Coordinate with the the blue fonts here.
44:29
I don't know. I got this damn feather that
44:31
keeps coming down and I don't know if it works.
44:35
I think I look too. Too Mormonish, don't you think?
44:39
Like I'm on a mission. Anyways, we were talking about a
44:43
lot of the recent events here with the passing of Matthew
44:46
Short and how conflicting it is on the different levels and
44:50
variations of of our friendship and our I guess our war that I
44:58
was choosing to have but kind of forced into over the over the
45:04
years. Now in recent years, but but
45:07
before that, you know, I Matt. Matt is what's interesting to
45:17
see some of the people coming around again and in his life,
45:21
our mutual friends in Texas who for the better part of the.
45:26
Time I knew him and was talking to him regularly and he was
45:29
doing shows here 1 and nothing. We're avoiding him and me too,
45:36
you know, So I, I'm like, OK, but him particularly.
45:39
And it and I noticed that started when he was doing and
45:43
working with me. And these are people.
45:47
He's known for a long time and I can't tell you how hurt he was
45:51
and. We had a, We had a.
45:53
Friendship that wasn't, you know, heart to heart or anything
45:57
and it wasn't like it was more adventure experience not, you
46:01
know, let let's you know, eat chocolate and ice cream and.
46:05
You know, watch the Titanic or whatever.
46:07
It wasn't like that, but for for one incident, it was on the
46:11
phone where he expressed his sorrows for that for some of
46:17
these people that just couldn't find the time for him anymore
46:20
because of his stance. And you know, I maybe they're
46:24
they're miracle jabbing their kids and I think one of them did
46:27
or whatever. But you know that that shouldn't
46:29
affect anybody, but they chose to make that.
46:31
And these people on time are still don't talk to me.
46:35
Especially now, but now they're coming around again.
46:38
And that bothers me too because they've been gone for so long
46:43
and they've seen a guy who had to move back to the middle of
46:46
nowhere, you know, right before 2020, that was suffering, just
46:52
lost his father. You know, he's constantly
46:55
drinking to the point when even he was trying to battle me, he
46:59
was so drunk. He was spilling over his words
47:03
and at the same breath telling people how he was taking care of
47:05
his mother. And we're thinking, I'm
47:07
thinking, you know, this guy can't even drive right now.
47:10
But nobody had the the thought to say anything.
47:14
But now they come around again. They come around again.
47:19
And that's to me is in, you know, not that I can say
47:24
anything or will say anything, but I just think it shows that.
47:28
You know, like the Mark Plain quote of the timid.
47:31
It it's just the timid come around when there's no longer a,
47:35
you know, a a villainous opposition skewering your
47:39
thoughts. That's when they come around and
47:42
and, you know, but but Matt. Was a true blue guy and and a.
47:47
Lot of these people I thought were.
47:49
You know, I was hurt. I, you know, Christian, I felt a
47:52
part of her family, too. I'm like, I'm always like the
47:54
adopted boy on the sitcom, you know, about seven seasons.
47:58
And on a show they have to change it up so they.
48:02
You know it the. Storyline they always adopt A
48:04
kid somewhere you know the new kid.
48:07
I'm always like available for adoption and I thought I.
48:10
Cool. The Christian Megan family
48:12
adopted me. I'm going to their place for
48:14
Thanksgiving. Well, that never happened and I
48:17
feel bad. You know, when I was really
48:20
young, I was always around my friend Stevie and his huge
48:23
family. I had two brothers and cousins
48:27
and a grandparent. They all lived in one house it.
48:32
Was like, it was like. 11 is enough, you know, I remember
48:35
that they had the big old Remember the big phone, Remember
48:39
the phones with the long extension cords?
48:41
That that, that are all curled up like pig's.
48:43
Tails and stuff like that. Remember those I can never
48:47
forget the day they had the like the largest one.
48:49
It was like 10 feet if not more. And then they have the knots in
48:54
it too. If you didn't like untie it and
48:57
then that was such a pain in the ass.
49:00
You might remember those. And then the big game changer is
49:03
when they had the cordless phone, home phone come out.
49:07
That's how you knew that's it's business time when you had that
49:11
so followed the answering machine.
49:13
And I mean, I mean, to have been there during those times as many
49:18
of us were, it is truly a magical experience that kids
49:22
today will never understand or learn.
49:25
They never understand or learn. They certainly won't.
49:29
But with that said, I think some of the best shows and I'm
49:38
putting together, I'm putting together a, a compilation of
49:43
sorts of Matt's most memorable moments here.
49:49
You know, if I could, if I could find find them and find the time
49:52
to do them. Because there were, There were.
49:54
Those moments, there was those episodes and shows we did
49:57
together that. You could feel.
50:01
At the time I remember thinking. You could feel the hair on your
50:04
arm stand up and it it. It wasn't necessarily.
50:13
Because it was it was it's a different time.
50:16
It was a very crucial time. Every the world was on edge of
50:19
is Trump going to contest the election is, you know, what's
50:26
this Biden going to do? I mean, the world was watching.
50:30
We didn't think, you know, things were going to turn around
50:32
just like that and go back to Mayberry and there there was a
50:37
new media. That derived from the lockdowns.
50:42
We were the one of the first shows to do that just by luck.
50:46
And those people were now dominating the conversation of
50:51
what's happening in the world. And I was a part of that.
50:57
And Matt was too. And it was a an incredible
51:02
hanging on every word of moments, every time we we did
51:05
the shows. And as different as we were, he,
51:07
he understood, he got, he got my vibe and he understood the my
51:13
delivery and I understood his. And when those two connected, it
51:19
was truly, it was truly a sensational shows.
51:22
I mean, some of that, I mean, you may not know, but I mean,
51:24
we're talking 100,000 views, 50,000 views at the at the very
51:29
least on Facebook and thousands on YouTube.
51:34
Now I get I'm lucky if I get 200 views on YouTube and I routinely
51:39
get about 1500 on Facebook nightly.
51:42
It's it's. Just like clockwork.
51:44
Now and they just install it now and the same with rumble as
51:48
well. So I, I don't, you know, it
51:51
shouldn't bother me, but it, it, it does at times.
51:55
I mean, I've been dealing with it.
51:56
I mean we can't get a big gas because that, and I understand,
51:59
but that's just the nature of these.
52:02
But you know, I there's so many. Before before this.
52:07
What I enjoy doing is, is producing and I produced a lot
52:12
of things during my time before I was here and, and before this
52:21
actually, I had the offer to be an executive producer with Art
52:25
Bell at the Dark Matters Radio Network broadcasting Network.
52:30
And it was offered to me and I, I declined it, believe it or
52:34
not, because I believed in this and what I'm doing, Realvio
52:39
Media and I believed in the audience and the viewers who
52:43
give me direction, give me solos and provide me company and, and
52:48
provide me a lot of energy to, you know, we recycle it and give
52:53
it back. But I, I chose this because
52:55
although it may never be the most incredible, spectacular
53:01
Fortune 500 of a network or anything close to that nature,
53:06
it's the freedom of doing your creativity and, and, and
53:12
transmitting your message and also transmitting other people's
53:17
messages through your platforms and the freedom of that and the
53:22
freedom of creating music and film.
53:27
Just purely for the love. Of it in regards to music, it
53:30
used to be you know the business and how are we going to get
53:33
booked here? None of that matters anymore, so
53:35
the freedom of that is priceless and.
53:39
You. Can't put a price tag on it.
53:41
You can't find it in anywhere because I've always worked for
53:44
other people. You know, when I do, I step on
53:47
toes because you know, it's, it's better than the real guy,
53:51
you know, the head guy's work. And then you know, I'm, I'm, I'm
53:54
a competition now and unbeknownst to me, 'cause I
53:57
never know these things or see the signs and then I get fired,
54:00
you know. So to have it like you know, it
54:05
has been and believe me, the past year has been challenging.
54:08
Let's I think, you know, but to have that it is great.
54:14
And then to bring your friends into it as I attempted to and
54:18
try to. It can go very well but for a
54:22
short time only in some cases but but magical.
54:26
But so before this. Yeah.
54:28
I was doing a lot of these wonderful little ventures and
54:32
and TV Land game shows. I would produce.
54:35
I'd be asked to a book and you know I would be asked to help
54:39
shoot ATV pilot as a associate producer.
54:43
You know we do just. The the wildest.
54:46
Shows you can imagine something called weed court, you know
54:50
about people that are going into court to argue about weed and
54:52
all this or for some reason there's a lot of you know the
54:57
drug the drug narrative was we were doing like the history of
55:00
drugs working with the guy from the the movie blow named George
55:04
Jung doing his voice overs producing that.
55:08
And then, you know, I would throw mad in there as well
55:11
because he he's just so crazy. Now if he'd be like the ultimate
55:14
crew that you would want with the camera going into the
55:17
jungles of. Madagascar or something crazy
55:20
like that. And, and, and it worked.
55:22
And I remember this one, this one time I, I don't know if I
55:26
shared it, but he, he really liked that show, that naked and
55:33
afraid show. It's a survivalist show.
55:34
It, it's a, it stems from, I guess survivor, that old show.
55:38
And he wanted me to put them on there and I said I happen to
55:41
have a friend. Who's the central casting agent
55:46
who's booking all the people for the show?
55:48
He goes, can you get me on myself?
55:50
Of course. Just send me XY and ZS.
55:54
So he sends me all these things in an e-mail.
55:56
So he sends me the pictures of himself.
55:58
I wish I still had him. I probably do.
56:00
Where he's shirtless, he's shirtless.
56:04
Mountain climbing and there's a camera up here and he's looking
56:06
up. It's so unnatural.
56:08
It's incredible. And then there's like another
56:12
picture of him by the river, shirtless.
56:15
And I'm doing one of these and, and he so wanted to be that guy.
56:19
He so loved that challenge. Like Rambo?
56:22
So I, I, I. Sent it to my people and then
56:26
they got back to me and told me and like Oh my God.
56:32
So I I realized what I had. Submitted him to.
56:37
Was not naked and Afraid like I originally thought my friend was
56:41
casting for you. It was for dating naked, a show
56:44
on VH1 at that time about a lot of just, you know, adults, young
56:49
people, young adults who are on the island speed dating but in
56:53
the nude. So I had to go back to Matt to
56:56
tell him this and said, Matt, I don't know how to tell you this,
57:00
but all those photos I sent of you and they were just stellar
57:04
and great. I, I just want to let you know,
57:05
but I, I accidentally misheard something and I, I sent them to
57:10
Dating naked on VH1. I hope you understand.
57:16
And you know, I hope so 'cause Hell's too hot this time of
57:20
year. And he he was so embarrassed and
57:25
he was so embarrassed, but he said or don't tell Julie.
57:29
But this is great. I can do it.
57:31
I can. And he starts doing this.
57:33
I can, I can date naked on the island.
57:35
I can do it. And his girlfriend Julie at the
57:37
time. And Julie.
57:40
Was so upset and I had to apologize.
57:42
She was upset at me and she was upset at him because he was
57:45
actually gearing up to be on there.
57:46
And but that's the kind of guy he was is that he wasn't like
57:51
myself in a way. And and he wasn't solely.
57:56
The, the, you know, war gaming specialist, the guy that knew
57:59
things from the underground and all that stuff.
58:01
And, you know, he, he, he was a good sport and willing
58:05
participant to do an assortment of things that goes well beyond
58:10
the world of news. And that's what makes people
58:13
like him very special. You know, throughout, you know,
58:17
with all his downfalls and certainly there there were and
58:21
you know, certainly some of us could have done more and and and
58:25
all that and I'll be thinking about that for the rest of my
58:27
life. I could have done more, you
58:28
know, but those moments like that or so many of them before
58:35
all of this, what you see that to me that we will define that
58:41
great friendship in the end, because I mean, I just I as much
58:47
as I didn't not like Matt. The last couple years I.
58:51
Certainly didn't hate him and hate him enough to want him to
58:55
perish the way he did. And.
58:57
And, and I can't. That will forever live with me
58:59
too. So I wanted to share this with
59:01
you here tonight because. Thank you.
59:08
Yeah. I wanted to share this with you
59:09
tonight because I think that there's a lot of people out
59:13
there who deal with things maybe the way I do.
59:19
We double down in our workload, we go silent and quiet and we
59:31
deal with things by not dealing with things.
59:32
And you know, I kind of had a crazy parents grown up and
59:37
that's how I dealt with her as well.
59:39
And I dealt with her by not dealing with her.
59:41
And that came back to bite me and the derriere 2 and and many
59:44
others. But so you know, when, when that
59:50
quote of John Lennon, which was just so resonating in my head
59:53
today of life is what happens when you're busy making other
59:57
plans. And I said, my God, it's true.
1:00:00
The past five years I have been the ultimate workhorse.
1:00:04
I have allowed many aspects of my life to pass me by or to be
1:00:12
to be unattended to. And I mean many aspects which I
1:00:18
I won't get into just yet. With that, too, comes friends
1:00:26
that I, I have allowed to not, you know, not kept in touch or
1:00:30
contact who the perception could be that Dean thinks she's better
1:00:35
than us. Look at him doing this.
1:00:37
And, and that's not the case at all.
1:00:38
I'm so entrenched and embedded in what I'm doing.
1:00:41
And it takes a lot of great focus and a lot of great
1:00:44
willpower and just a stubbornness in a way at times
1:00:49
to get through and, and, and do. Not just to do, but to do very.
1:00:53
Well and efficiently that I think a lot of the things that
1:00:58
have passed me by or have remained or become unattended to
1:01:03
in any not the best way. Well that's friendship and
1:01:08
friends in general. And I think friends are like
1:01:14
plants in a way in a garden that if, if you don't throw a little
1:01:18
water on these things that are supposed to give you wonderful
1:01:22
moods, you know, like flowers and and all these things and
1:01:25
have many health attributes. If you don't water your garden,
1:01:29
if you don't tend to your friendships with people that.
1:01:32
It could go. Awry on not just yourself and
1:01:35
what you have but on them as well.
1:01:38
And I think that in the past 72 hours now I have that has really
1:01:44
dawned on me in that quote. As I said, life is what happens
1:01:48
when you're busy making other plans.
1:01:51
That has never resonated in me more than ever than it does now.
1:01:56
And so I think myself, myself only.
1:02:01
I can only speak for myself. And maybe.
1:02:05
Others out there if. They can see it too, if that I
1:02:08
have to. I, I need to make a better
1:02:10
effort to, to realize the life around me out outside of what I
1:02:17
do and tend to that. And that would probably make me
1:02:23
a better and probably happier person as a whole.
1:02:26
You know, because I certainly would hate to see another person
1:02:32
go the way he did, but to to leave and go thinking that I'm a
1:02:41
villainous or I'm not that person that they thought, you
1:02:45
know, and that that's a terrible way.
1:02:47
And that's not the closure people should have, certainly
1:02:50
not the closure I want as well. So anyways, I was going to end
1:02:54
it there. I want to thank you for
1:02:57
remaining here this time. I hope that I shared a little
1:03:01
bit of. The history here of.
1:03:03
Real deal media what what has happened, why it happened
1:03:07
without embarking too much on the and the, he said she said
1:03:12
all that stuff, but. But really to.
1:03:15
Put it into context about friendship on just exactly how
1:03:21
much does that mean and at what cost?
1:03:25
So that's certainly what I've learned here tonight.
1:03:27
So I want to thank you members for staying with me and staying
1:03:31
on this journey and helping this franchise continue to move along
1:03:36
as we search for our golden era as we were promised here.
1:03:40
But rather than doing it alone, we're doing it together in the
1:03:46
best way possible as friends. So for that, I thank you.
1:03:49
So I'm going to leave it there. I'll see everybody tomorrow
1:03:52
night. I'll be back to normal.
1:03:54
You know, even Humpty Dumpty got back together again, didn't any.
1:03:57
So for all of us here at Real Deal Media's Night Owls Lounge,
1:04:01
I'm Dean Ryan. Yes, I am and I will be back
1:04:04
tomorrow. Always around to stay tuned and
1:04:07
stay awake. Good night everybody.
1:04:14
All right, here's another. One, and I'm not even telling
1:04:16
Sean what this is. Let's see how he interprets it
1:04:18
for the layman's. If a man could be two places at
1:04:27
one time, will I be with you tomorrow and today beside you?
1:05:40
The.