Latest / Em Pé Na Rede - Podcasts / CONVERTENDO UM LADRÃO - HISTÓRIAS DA PLATEIA #19

Transcript

CONVERTENDO UM LADRÃO - HISTÓRIAS DA PLATEIA #19 · Em Pé Na Rede - Podcasts

• 0:00
  Attention, attention, people of São Paulo.
• 0:02
  I'm here to let you know that
• 0:03
  the special Pé na Rede show is coming soon
• 0:04
  ! And it will be on Friday, July 24th
• 0:08
  , at BTG Pactual Hall. And of
• 0:11
  course, we'll be doing our
• 0:13
  classic video recording for our
• 0:15
  YouTube channel.
• 0:15
  And for those who are shy, don't
• 0:16
  worry, nobody appears in the video.
• 0:18
  We'll only use your audio, but it's going to
• 0:20
  be wonderful. Don't lose.
• 0:21
  And it's very easy to get there, it's in
• 0:23
  your area, over there in Santo Amaro. You can
• 0:26
  pay in up to 12 installments. So hurry and
• 0:28
  secure your ticket now. Click the link
• 0:30
  and we'll see you at BTG Pactual Hall.
• 0:34
  Ladies and gentlemen, I am Víor
• 0:35
  Camejo.
• 0:35
  I am Rominho Braga.
• 0:36
  I am Osmar Camp. We are the one on the network.
• 0:39
  The Audience Stories segment begins now. Make some
• 0:42
  noise, Barbichas Club.
• 0:45
  Starting another story from the audience.
• 0:47
  Leave a like, subscribe to the channel,
• 0:48
  come watch us live every
• 0:50
  Sunday here in São Paulo, tell us a
• 0:51
  story, or you can
• 0:55
  hire us,
• 0:56
  hire us on the network, it's here. I even got
• 0:57
  emotional when I remembered that
• 0:59
  possibility. If you, from anywhere in Brazil
• 1:00
  , from anywhere in the world, want
• 1:02
  to hire the father on the network, we can go
• 1:03
  to your company, to your house, anywhere
• 1:06
  you
• 1:07
  are, we don't do it at the person's house. The
• 1:08
  three of us were in the room like this, just staring at the
• 1:10
  person's face.
• 1:11
  Damn,
• 1:11
  I'm going to be your boyfriend and 10 cats. We have
• 1:15
  n't gone yet, we haven't gone yet. We've already
• 1:17
  been. So, if the pay is right,
• 1:20
  guys. If you have the money, we're
• 1:22
  here. Let's go. And today we're going to hear
• 1:24
  our friend's story. What is your name?
• 1:26
  Tina. Tinan,
• 1:27
  Tinan with a T. T Y N. Tin, before we
• 1:31
  hear your story, let's quickly
• 1:32
  start with that name,
• 1:33
  tell us a little about yourself. Tin que Tinan has
• 1:36
  brothers and sisters.
• 1:37
  I have Taluan, Tuan, and Isabela.
• 1:41
  Isabela. Isabela is leaving her mother.
• 1:43
  Isabela is adopted.
• 1:44
  My father didn't. My father is not her father.
• 1:46
  Like, she's my girl, part mother. My father
• 1:48
  wasn't even my name, it's Tinanã
• 1:50
  because he misspelled it.
• 1:52
  It was meant to be Titan. It was supposed to be Tainã, but she
• 1:53
  's not much better.
• 1:56
  Tainão.
• 1:57
  Tainã. And then he doesn't step on it, it's like tin tinn
• 1:59
  . Tau
• 2:01
  taluan e tuan.
• 2:02
  Tuan e tuan.
• 2:03
  When you were children, you were
• 2:04
  young and... AND
• 2:05
  . It's ta ta ta
• 2:06
  .
• 2:07
  And the age difference is quite large. We weren't
• 2:08
  kids together.
• 2:10
  So, in other words, your father didn't give up.
• 2:11
  [ __ ] it, it's over. And do you work with quinoa? Did
• 2:14
  he insist? I am a role-playing game master.
• 2:16
  RPG Game Master.
• 2:17
  What? Wait a minute. We talked about work.
• 2:20
  Hey, I don't
• 2:22
  believe that anyone is a sucker for everything. It
• 2:27
  must be really good then, huh?
• 2:29
  Wow, you have one?
• 2:30
  Either he must be very good, or his life
• 2:31
  is very poor. And that.
• 2:33
  Both.
• 2:34
  Nobody said he's rich, he said
• 2:36
  he makes a living from it. I didn't say it pays
• 2:37
  well. I didn't say it pays well, it just says it pays. Some
• 2:39
  people live with very little.
• 2:40
  He's been saving up for a year to come
• 2:41
  here.
• 2:43
  Joke. I'm not even saving money.
• 2:46
  I won a ticket.
• 2:49
  I gave it to him. I was at the event today.
• 2:51
  I was at the event.
• 2:52
  Thanks.
• 2:53
  I was at the event.
• 2:54
  Wow, man. A. No joke, A. And it's been happening
• 2:56
  at home. But do you have any data there?
• 2:58
  I have.
• 2:59
  Of course it does.
• 2:59
  I have a jar full of data
• 3:01
  here. Folks,
• 3:01
  every magician carries a deck of cards.
• 3:04
  Everyone who's a "larou" (a term used to describe someone who plays cards or games) carries a deck of cards, and
• 3:05
  every game master carries a die.
• 3:07
  Damn. AND
• 3:08
  . But it's awful walking around with a die, isn't it,
• 3:10
  man? Because
• 3:10
  I was there, I came from... I was at the
• 3:12
  RPG event. I came straight here from the
• 3:14
  RPG event. But this is just
• 3:16
  RPG data.
• 3:17
  Yes, there are D20, D7,
• 3:19
  D20, and D4 types. Tu
• 3:22
  D6, D8, D10, D12, D20.
• 3:25
  Wow, you sometimes make your own decisions
• 3:28
  . For those who don't know, depending
• 3:30
  on your score, you
• 3:32
  can perform an action within the
• 3:34
  game, right? That. Have
• 3:35
  you ever done this in your life?
• 3:37
  Like, should I eat this
• 3:38
  or this? Let me see.
• 3:40
  Not in everyday life, but when we're in a
• 3:43
  group with friends, we'll do
• 3:44
  something else, we'll play games, we'll
• 3:46
  decide something. Enjoy
• 3:48
  your life. Yes,
• 3:51
  no, he talks like this, he talks like this,
• 3:52
  let's do such and such. Come on, I'm going to roll
• 3:54
  the dice, okay? R$ 50. That's
• 3:57
  because I work, I'm working
• 3:59
  now. I'm working. I
• 4:00
  work until 8.
• 4:02
  But now that we're here,
• 4:03
  how do you promote your work? I
• 4:05
  have platforms, like, you need to
• 4:06
  advertise the tables, but I also advertise on
• 4:09
  social media. Can
• 4:10
  you post your photo?
• 4:12
  No, only the image of
• 4:14
  É, because that's how it is, when I publicize it, I
• 4:16
  publicize the story I'm going to tell,
• 4:17
  because suddenly it's a
• 4:18
  narrative process. So, uh, I'm going to tell that
• 4:19
  story. So, I take the story's cover
• 4:20
  , the image related to the story,
• 4:22
  and I share it. But
• 4:22
  you didn't just head over heels and put on like a hood
• 4:24
  .
• 4:24
  It's a hood, an image like this, see?
• 4:26
  I'll be at your house and I'll tell you stories.
• 4:28
  Wow, I don't want that guy in
• 4:29
  my house.
• 4:31
  On my Instagram. Come on, girls,
• 4:33
  invite me to your house. You can trust
• 4:36
  me. I always carry data with me. It could be
• 4:39
  any time. The
• 4:41
  scariest guy in the universe is in your
• 4:43
  house.
• 4:44
  Call me, call me to your house and the
• 4:45
  police too. You
• 4:47
  must have been joking, man.
• 4:49
  I understood. Yes, it was a good idea
• 4:50
  indeed. Hey, do you want to promote
• 4:52
  your Instagram handle (@)?
• 4:53
  My Instagram is No, Master.
• 4:56
  No, sir.
• 4:57
  It's like a No, but it's a No.
• 4:59
  It is. It's because, well, the idea is like
• 5:01
  this: I'm not a PG master,
• 5:03
  but I don't call myself a master. I'm more of a
• 5:05
  collaborator, someone who's committed
• 5:07
  , a master coach, you know? Yeah, it's a
• 5:12
  humanized RPG, right? It's true. So yeah,
• 5:14
  maybe you're the first LinkedIn RPG master
• 5:16
  I've ever seen, man.
• 5:18
  No, sir. And truth.
• 5:19
  Come here. So what story do you
• 5:20
  have for today
• 5:21
  ? When it
• 5:22
  's for real, right? I'm making this up
• 5:23
  for us right now.
• 5:25
  Calm.
• 5:26
  He tells the story, rolling the
• 5:27
  dice like this, right? So I went in
• 5:28
  and then in
• 5:29
  the mall
• 5:30
  I opened the... And inside the store I even
• 5:31
  opened it and there was
• 5:32
  a dragon. Foder doesn't have a dragon,
• 5:35
  I was in the American one
• 5:38
  and halfway through the story he's going to start
• 5:39
  charging us. You
• 5:42
  're from when I was in high school, me and
• 5:44
  a friend of mine, we kind of evangelized
• 5:46
  some criminals so we wouldn't get robbed.
• 5:49
  He evangelized criminals so he wouldn't get
• 5:51
  robbed. Okay
• 5:52
  , tell me about it. Just that. To start.
• 5:55
  If
• 5:56
  not, then it's already a spoiler. Damn,
• 5:57
  it looked like Dragon Ball Z. Die, Goku,
• 6:01
  watch it now. Damn, now I know what kind of
• 6:03
  explosion it is. That's the title. That's the title that makes you
• 6:05
  click on the story, right?
• 6:06
  Go, go, go, go. It's true.
• 6:07
  When I was in high school,
• 6:08
  we were at a fair, an event at
• 6:10
  school, and we had to buy some
• 6:11
  materials that were missing. Me and a
• 6:13
  friend of mine went to buy them on the street, like
• 6:14
  near the school. Speak a
• 6:16
  little slower and a little
• 6:17
  louder. Yeah, turn up the microphone for the
• 6:19
  audience too.
• 6:20
  Ah, my school was on an avenue like that
• 6:21
  and we went to buy some
• 6:23
  things we needed for a...
• 6:24
  You had just been beaten up by the
• 6:25
  bullies
• 6:27
  from Quies.
• 6:30
  It's the guy who is that guy who
• 6:32
  hits, it had a bug.
• 6:33
  He's the guy who beats up the RPG players. Oh
• 6:35
  there.
• 6:36
  Leave him alone because he knows what he's going through; he
• 6:37
  's saying that, apparently, he was the one who got
• 6:39
  beaten up. And truth. That's what it was like, "
• 6:42
  Oh, damn, Mom." Here come the Bings.
• 6:45
  Who is that son of a [ __ ]? I was amazed
• 6:48
  at school, just like you were back in high school.
• 6:49
  I wasn't into
• 6:51
  RPGs, you started playing RPGs later,
• 6:54
  and we were going
• 6:57
  back to school when two guys
• 6:59
  approached us and asked for our cell phones.
• 7:00
  They didn't show a weapon, and I did
• 7:03
  n't want to doubt that they
• 7:04
  had one. So,
• 7:04
  to find out if they had a weapon, they made a
• 7:07
  perception check.
• 7:09
  They were like, something like
• 7:11
  that. Okay
• 7:12
  ,
• 7:12
  but in my defense, I was
• 7:14
  16 years old. I didn't want that either. It
• 7:16
  's OK. Yes, 16 years old and they can already vote. AND.
• 7:19
  And he's already getting shot at too. Right away
• 7:21
  . He's over 18. No, even younger, I
• 7:23
  think.
• 7:24
  I, like, I handed over my cell phone and
• 7:26
  my friend had a shirt tied around his
• 7:27
  waist and you couldn't see
• 7:29
  his pockets, and then he said, "No, I don't have my
• 7:31
  cell phone." And he had a wired headset
• 7:33
  hanging from his shirt.
• 7:34
  I have my food.
• 7:37
  These pants don't have pockets. You
• 7:39
  'll never discover that there are
• 7:40
  pockets under your shirt.
• 7:42
  All I have here is a tie.
• 7:45
  And then the guy goes to his cell phone, saying, "No, I don't have my
• 7:47
  cell phone, I don't have my cell phone." This
• 7:49
  headset isn't just a headset; it's a headset, you pick up
• 7:50
  the headset and the guy doesn't go to his cell phone. And
• 7:52
  dude, I go out with headphones on, I hang a pair of headphones around my
• 7:54
  neck and go.
• 7:56
  Oh, not headphones, but the headphones are right here.
• 7:58
  And then, like, out of nowhere, in the calmest moment in the
• 8:00
  world, like, I'm tall, I'm almost
• 8:02
  1.90 meters, and my friend is taller than me.
• 8:03
  Wow. Damn, how big were those
• 8:05
  thugs, kid? They were short,
• 8:07
  man.
• 8:08
  They were short, too.
• 8:09
  That was when I was 16 years old. I left the optician's
• 8:11
  chair, the thief was arriving.
• 8:16
  Hey man, I don't want any trouble. And then my
• 8:18
  friend, with the greatest calm in the world, looks at
• 8:20
  his face and says: "Do you believe in
• 8:22
  God?
• 8:22
  Dude, the guys are charging their cell phones.
• 8:26
  This time we got a big one.
• 8:29
  No.
• 8:29
  And then my friend suddenly looks at
• 8:31
  his face and asks: "Please,
• 8:35
  I'm going to blow, I'm going to blow."
• 8:40
  Damn, kid. Child, 16 years old, 2 meters tall,
• 8:44
  son of a [ __ ]. Repeat. He
• 8:45
  can vote since he was 12 with that height.
• 8:49
  He doesn't have, there are five
• 8:50
  Power Rangers on his head. One
• 8:53
  way
• 8:55
  to wake up. But there's one that used to blow a
• 8:57
  flute. I
• 9:01
  came out like that inside the pool. Damn, man.
• 9:03
  [ __ ]. Hmm. [ __ ], [ __ ].
• 9:07
  His father was born, he was the Zorder's
• 9:09
  children. Talan, talon.
• 9:14
  Sorry, man. It's the scream, right?
• 9:16
  Taruan. Taruan. Taran. Taruan. Sorry.
• 9:20
  My bad.
• 9:20
  Your show. That's right.
• 9:22
  Sorry, master.
• 9:23
  Sorry. No, it's not master.
• 9:25
  Damn. And he already said.
• 9:26
  And we He's under 70 too, man.
• 9:28
  So, damn.
• 9:28
  It's true. If you raise your voice there, and then out
• 9:31
  of nowhere he looks
• 9:33
  at the bandits and asks: "Do you
• 9:35
  believe in God out of nowhere?" And then the guy,
• 9:38
  like, the guy didn't know how to react, the
• 9:39
  bandit was like,
• 9:40
  wow, right? Then he said, "
• 9:41
  Hey, this part of the robbery didn't
• 9:43
  teach me.
• 9:43
  Do this, I'll shoot you and
• 9:44
  you tell me what's there,
• 9:47
  then you come back here and tell me."
• 9:49
  And then the guy says: "I believe." Then I already
• 9:51
  said, I already bought into his idea. I
• 9:53
  said: "Do you think God would
• 9:54
  like you robbing?" Look, it
• 9:57
  's very, it's a very common thing
• 9:59
  you do in churches, buying into
• 10:00
  ideas. Yeah.
• 10:02
  And then the guys were kind of like,
• 10:04
  what do you think of that?
• 10:07
  And then the guy gave me back my cell phone.
• 10:09
  No way. I swear
• 10:09
  , I swear. He gave me back my cell phone.
• 10:11
  He said: "Thank God."
• 10:12
  Yes. It was. And then?
• 10:15
  And since there was an event at the school,
• 10:17
  we wanted to get back quickly. Then the
• 10:19
  guy looks at me and asks, "How do
• 10:21
  I get in?" I was at
• 10:23
  Etec, the technical school. "How do I get into
• 10:24
  Etec?" My first
• 10:26
  thought was, he wants to
• 10:27
  physically break in to steal because the school
• 10:28
  is open. I didn't understand
• 10:29
  . I distract the doorman
• 10:32
  and you sign up.
• 10:35
  I distract the doorman and you attend a
• 10:36
  class.
• 10:38
  But he really wanted to study. He said he had to
• 10:40
  take a test and everything.
• 10:42
  Okay, give me your phone.
• 10:44
  Then he looked at me, you have to take a
• 10:46
  test, pay for it, it won't work, you have to
• 10:49
  go to the notary's office.
• 10:50
  How much is it, about R$50? Then
• 10:52
  give me R$50.
• 10:54
  And the worst part is his answer, I think it
• 10:55
  was even funnier, he
• 10:56
  looked at me, "Do you have the answers to the test?"
• 10:58
  And I said, "No, each time a
• 11:00
  different test."
• 11:01
  And his friend said, "Hmm, you
• 11:03
  know who has the answers?"
• 11:04
  God. God, those kinds of things. Answers.
• 11:07
  And then we managed to get out of
• 11:09
  our homes without being robbed. And the
• 11:11
  funniest thing is that neither my friend nor I
• 11:12
  believe in God. We're atheists,
• 11:15
  we left God to those guys.
• 11:17
  Wow. Okay
• 11:18
  , fine. We left it.
• 11:20
  You should believe now that we
• 11:21
  saved you.
• 11:23
  Kid, you don't know, but you're ready
• 11:26
  to be a pastor of several churches.
• 11:27
  Yeah, man.
• 11:28
  Wow, you
• 11:28
  already have everything, everything you need. All
• 11:30
  the little boxes, all the little boxes, right?
• 11:32
  Yeah, man. Wow, that's a really good
• 11:34
  story, dude. Let's go, let's go to the
• 11:35
  second story in the song.
• 11:37
  We don't recommend you do this
• 11:38
  in your house, okay? Don't react to a
• 11:40
  church robbery
• 11:42
  with words
• 11:43
  that sometimes the thief doesn't
• 11:44
  believe. Then he says: "No, are
• 11:49
  you okay?"
• 11:50
  Okay.
• 11:51
  What's your name?
• 11:51
  Básia. Base is a good name, base is
• 11:55
  good. Básia
• 11:56
  came strong, just kidding. Básia
• 12:00
  S.
• 12:01
  Básia came strong. She said
• 12:03
  the base very strongly.
• 12:06
  Hello Virginha, do
• 12:07
  you believe? In God?
• 12:09
  I believe in Him. That's why
• 12:10
  you don't rob people, right? That's
• 12:11
  true. That's
• 12:11
  true. It's
• 12:12
  impossible, right? I'm a teacher, there's
• 12:14
  no way. I get robbed inside the
• 12:16
  classroom. So,
• 12:17
  I understand.
• 12:18
  No, just kidding. Wow
• 12:20
  ,
• 12:20
  you see that a teacher's life isn't
• 12:22
  easy, right?
• 12:23
  It's impossible. I've tried.
• 12:26
  They rob me first.
• 12:28
  It's full of bullying.
• 12:29
  Yeah. What kind of
• 12:32
  teacher do you teach?
• 12:34
  I teach elementary school. Elementary school
• 12:36
  ?
• 12:37
  Yeah,
• 12:37
  she even forgot elementary school.
• 12:40
  It's because I teach so many classes
• 12:41
  that we end up forgetting.
• 12:42
  Yes, yes. Wow, how many classes do you
• 12:44
  teach?
• 12:44
  I teach a child in the
• 12:46
  5th grade in the morning and
• 12:47
  a child in the afternoon... Okay... with
• 12:49
  autistic children. Okay
• 12:50
  .
• 12:51
  And in the afternoon a child in the third grade. Good thing
• 12:52
  you specified because I was about to make
• 12:54
  a joke. Yeah,
• 12:57
  you said autistic. Vitor ready to
• 12:59
  humiliate the child.
• 13:02
  Swallowing a joke here. Ah, it
• 13:04
  slipped out, it slipped out, it slipped out. What Delicious.
• 13:06
  Almost, almost, almost,
• 13:08
  almost. My career is over.
• 13:11
  My career passed before my
• 13:12
  eyes. Now, if this child loses this
• 13:14
  side, she's screwed in my pocket.
• 13:21
  Wait a minute, damn it. But you're going to her house?
• 13:24
  Huh?
• 13:25
  You're going to her house?
• 13:25
  No, I help at school, okay
• 13:27
  ?
• 13:27
  Inside the classroom.
• 13:29
  There, there
• 13:29
  she has a whole room to herself,
• 13:31
  a room the size of a normal classroom.
• 13:32
  Let's put it simply.
• 13:33
  Yes, there are 25 children and I only help
• 13:35
  the autistic child.
• 13:37
  There's another teacher for the rest of the
• 13:39
  class. Yes. Okay. And then? And then? How many more
• 13:41
  classes? You said? More classes.
• 13:43
  I have the other third-grade class. I
• 13:44
  understand. Ah, so there are two. There are two,
• 13:46
  one in the morning and one in the afternoon,
• 13:47
  but it counts as 200.
• 13:48
  Exactly. Do
• 13:49
  you smoke, do you smoke?
• 13:50
  Huh? Do you
• 13:51
  smoke?
• 13:51
  No.
• 13:52
  Ah,
• 13:53
  it's because of your voice? It's from
• 13:55
  shouting so much. No,
• 13:55
  no, no, no. Your voice doesn't matter.
• 13:57
  Stress, really.
• 13:58
  Teacher stress.
• 13:59
  Teacher stress. People want, you know, little.
• 14:01
  People want to tell a story. Do you
• 14:02
  smoke? Thank God. We have a
• 14:03
  bunch of questionnaires to talk about
• 14:05
  your life.
• 14:05
  All the questions you want to know from
• 14:07
  your child's teacher. Do you smoke? I
• 14:09
  believe in God? Do
• 14:10
  you use drugs? Do
• 14:11
  you have any technique to make the room
• 14:13
  quiet? Ah, with the tactic, there
• 14:16
  's not much noise.
• 14:17
  I just yell. I
• 14:18
  yell. It's a good tactic. What kind
• 14:19
  of yell? The kind you shout or you speak?
• 14:22
  Yeah, we...
• 14:23
  Ah, a high-pitched yell. Let out a high-pitched yell.
• 14:25
  I understand.
• 14:26
  Then sometimes when I'm in
• 14:29
  front, I don't even need to yell because
• 14:31
  I have a very angry face. So
• 14:33
  I just make a face, and people stop.
• 14:35
  It's a serious face. Serious face
• 14:37
  . Serious face. Yeah. And what story did
• 14:39
  you bring us today?
• 14:41
  I brought the story of my ex who
• 14:44
  stalked me and my current girlfriend.
• 14:47
  Oh, so your ex stalked you. Wow,
• 14:51
  applause for gossip.
• 14:53
  Or or Or stalking. Or stalking.
• 14:55
  Yeah, that
• 14:56
  's not it. You have to stalk him.
• 14:58
  I'm trying to believe it was because of
• 15:00
  gossip.
• 15:02
  I thought
• 15:03
  he stalked my girlfriend, right?
• 15:04
  Destroying the Brazilian family. No.
• 15:07
  And the funny thing is that there were two claps. The
• 15:09
  guy, no, it
• 15:11
  's not the guy,
• 15:12
  just me,
• 15:13
  but
• 15:14
  that's
• 15:15
  not allowed here either, right?
• 15:17
  Oh, the world is boring, people. Boo-hoo
• 15:19
  ,
• 15:20
  the world is boring, damn it
• 15:21
  . It sucks. There were two, two
• 15:24
  claps.
• 15:24
  So, were you happy or unhappy with him?
• 15:27
  So, I had a somewhat toxic relationship with him
• 15:29
  .
• 15:30
  Oh, come on. On his part.
• 15:32
  On his part. And then I worked at
• 15:35
  a school and moved to another school in the
• 15:37
  city where I work and met her.
• 15:39
  What city is it?
• 15:40
  Rio Claro.
• 15:41
  Rio Claro, which is in São Paulo, right?
• 15:42
  In São Paulo. Yeah. Then I started getting
• 15:45
  closer to her and then an
• 15:47
  interest arose and one fine day,
• 15:50
  and you were already dating or was it
• 15:52
  something new? She Did she awaken
• 15:54
  something new in you? It was a very
• 15:56
  strange thing, because in my adolescence
• 15:57
  I had already been with a girl, but
• 15:59
  I had sworn up and down that I
• 16:01
  hadn't liked it.
• 16:02
  Oh, you promised you hadn't
• 16:04
  liked it.
• 16:05
  I swore, in there, damn it. And
• 16:08
  time passed.
• 16:08
  Go to hell. I hated
• 16:12
  the leg sliding here like that, you know?
• 16:15
  God. I don't want to understand. I don't want to
• 16:17
  understand.
• 16:17
  Sorry, guys. Sorry. It was a bit
• 16:19
  too much, wasn't it? My
• 16:19
  bad. We went a little too far.
• 16:22
  Sorry. And then when I saw her, it
• 16:23
  awakened that feeling from
• 16:26
  adolescence again.
• 16:27
  It was like that, the first time already, or
• 16:29
  with the coexistence, with everything.
• 16:30
  So, the year I met her,
• 16:32
  she was dating another teacher at the
• 16:34
  school.
• 16:34
  Okay. What school is that?
• 16:36
  No, wait a minute.
• 16:39
  That's the synopsis of several
• 16:41
  movies, huh.
• 16:42
  Wow, man. Several videos have that
• 16:44
  synopsis.
• 16:44
  If Grey's Anatomy were in school,
• 16:46
  that's Grey's Anatomy. That one.
• 16:48
  Gis anom
• 16:48
  gays anatomy.
• 16:49
  The teacher's meeting is really cool.
• 16:51
  Damn. Damn,
• 16:53
  bro.
• 16:57
  She, she didn't even, she didn't even get involved in the
• 16:58
  story. I've already seen two different protective measures
• 17:00
  .
• 17:01
  The lockers don't even have keys. He thought about the
• 17:03
  velcro that he's using
• 17:10
  there,
• 17:11
  damn. That's
• 17:12
  it,
• 17:15
  damn,
• 17:15
  damn. The legends are real, then,
• 17:17
  man. Yeah,
• 17:19
  and it took me a while to get close to her
• 17:21
  because of her ex.
• 17:22
  Of course, the other one was with...
• 17:24
  Meanwhile, I was with...
• 17:25
  unfortunately.
• 17:25
  Another teacher, what subject was the other teacher
• 17:27
  ?
• 17:28
  Was it kindergarten,
• 17:29
  okay? Hmm.
• 17:30
  I think she was in preschool and I was
• 17:32
  in kindergarten...
• 17:33
  No, because my fear was like
• 17:34
  physical education,
• 17:36
  man. It's tough. Broken.
• 17:38
  Then, and the following year, right, in 2025,
• 17:43
  she was already single and I started getting
• 17:45
  closer to her. We started
• 17:47
  becoming really good friends.
• 17:48
  But do you think they broke up
• 17:49
  because of you?
• 17:50
  No,
• 17:51
  no. It
• 17:51
  was already other issues. It
• 17:53
  was already another issue. You know, taste? And and
• 17:55
  in that and in At the beginning of 2025, I had a
• 17:58
  really bad fight with my ex and I told him
• 18:00
  I was tired of the relationship. Yeah,
• 18:03
  I'm 7 years older than him.
• 18:05
  Uh-huh. Wow. Yeah
• 18:06
  . And then I said to him, I said
• 18:08
  : "Look, come on,
• 18:08
  is he your student?"
• 18:10
  No,
• 18:11
  damn it.
• 18:12
  No, but it was something I loved to
• 18:13
  throw in his face.
• 18:18
  I'm going to switch places. You're the
• 18:20
  most immature person I know and I
• 18:22
  teach third grade?
• 18:25
  No, I threw it in his face that when
• 18:26
  he was going to say something to me, he'd
• 18:27
  say: "Shut up, when
• 18:28
  you were born I already knew how to read and
• 18:29
  write." I was like:
• 18:31
  "Wow, damn it."
• 18:32
  Then, uh, I had already told him that
• 18:35
  we were going to stay together, that we were going to take the
• 18:36
  relationship however it could, that when
• 18:38
  we became friends we'd
• 18:39
  break up,
• 18:40
  okay?
• 18:40
  Okay.
• 18:41
  We had already bought a house and a
• 18:43
  car, we were going to get married.
• 18:44
  Damn,
• 18:45
  wow. We were already good friends.
• 18:47
  Friendship?
• 18:48
  No, that was Before the fight.
• 18:50
  Oh, okay.
• 18:50
  So, I just kept going because I
• 18:52
  was afraid of having to hire a
• 18:55
  lawyer to separate.
• 18:56
  Damn, paperwork is a pain, right? Dealing with all
• 18:58
  that crap. [ __ ] it. I don't think I even
• 18:59
  like men anymore, but [ __ ] it, just
• 19:01
  for the headache.
• 19:02
  And [ __ ] it, right? Oh
• 19:03
  man, you have to start over, man. Better to
• 19:05
  lose and ruin my whole life.
• 19:07
  That's right.
• 19:07
  Then I met her, we became very good
• 19:09
  friends, we got close.
• 19:11
  And what kind of teacher is she?
• 19:12
  She's a lawyer,
• 19:13
  she works.
• 19:14
  She works in the school's office.
• 19:16
  But she's a lawyer by training.
• 19:18
  And then
• 19:19
  she arrives at the lawyer's office, how does the
• 19:21
  divorce thing work?
• 19:23
  Just tell me. Let's
• 19:24
  say I want to have a relationship with
• 19:26
  someone from my work. Did she
• 19:29
  know she could because she had already been in a
• 19:31
  relationship with someone at work?
• 19:32
  Yeah. Oh, so it was already allowed.
• 19:35
  Then one fine day there was the June festival at
• 19:37
  school. The next day I left him,
• 19:41
  Okay?
• 19:41
  Because I got annoyed. Well, not because I got annoyed
• 19:43
  , right? I was already in love with
• 19:45
  her, I just couldn't take it anymore. The
• 19:47
  reason for the breakup was because he wanted
• 19:50
  to listen to Gustavo Lima and I was already
• 19:52
  stressed because he was,
• 19:53
  now you were on the verge of collapse, right, dude?
• 19:55
  Man, I was on the ropes,
• 19:58
  I want to see a tiny drop, kid, that
• 20:00
  fell here, look.
• 20:01
  Honey, can you put on Gustavo?
• 20:07
  Just a little Gustavo Lima song.
• 20:09
  I'm going to call my lawyer
• 20:11
  because I really like Gustavo Lima.
• 20:14
  That's my favorite. Gustavo Lima.
• 20:17
  Guys, two kids and a dog. I don't
• 20:20
  think it's even that, I think it's Los
• 20:21
  Santana, I think. I never know.
• 20:23
  I think it's Santana.
• 20:24
  So I broke up with him on a Friday,
• 20:26
  on Saturday she and I went out, we went to the
• 20:28
  Orto Florestal that's in the city.
• 20:30
  But did something happen at the
• 20:31
  June festival? Why did you mention it? I got really
• 20:33
  angry because I sent a picture.
• 20:34
  But you were... The psychologist is now on to me
• 20:37
  .
• 20:38
  What happened was that I sent
• 20:40
  him a picture of myself. He turned to me and
• 20:41
  said, "You look too pretty for
• 20:43
  someone who went to work, get all disheveled."
• 20:45
  Oh
• 20:45
  [ __ ], my friend. But then, you know, we
• 20:48
  have to break up in less than 10 years
• 20:50
  .
• 20:50
  Yeah, it's impossible, it's impossible. I
• 20:52
  don't want Gustavo anymore, now it's just Ana
• 20:54
  Carolina. You and I aren't that
• 21:00
  complicated.
• 21:04
  So I broke up with him on Friday, on
• 21:06
  Saturday we went to the orthodontist
• 21:08
  and suddenly we
• 21:10
  kissed, I looked back.
• 21:12
  What do you mean, suddenly we
• 21:13
  kissed?
• 21:14
  It's because we were talking
• 21:15
  really close, talking,
• 21:37
  like, talking, that's why I broke up yesterday. No, she'd been following the drama since the photo from the party. She took the picture. Send it to him. He'll love it. Send the picture to that jerk. Send it. I want to see what he'll say.
• 21:39
  Then after I kissed her, I
• 21:41
  looked at her because in The photo showed her like this,
• 21:43
  look. She's
• 21:45
  very well-dressed. Well-dressed. She
• 21:48
  dressed up nicely.
• 21:49
  We're not socializing here
• 21:51
  . Then after I kissed her,
• 21:54
  when I looked, he was trying to
• 21:56
  hide behind a bush. They
• 21:58
  were both here.
• 21:59
  He came after me.
• 22:01
  You and her were here. And he was
• 22:03
  hiding there.
• 22:09
  What are you doing?
• 22:11
  Wait,
• 22:15
  wait.
• 22:18
  Calm down.
• 22:20
  The guy was in the bush. Flap, flap, flap.
• 22:25
  Stop. Flap. Flap. Flap. Stop.
• 22:27
  Stop, he's watching. No, don't stop.
• 22:29
  Don't stop. Don't stop.
• 22:30
  I want to see how far this goes.
• 22:31
  I don't have
• 22:33
  this doubt that's killing me,
• 22:36
  damn it.
• 22:38
  Then, after a while, he came over to
• 22:40
  where we were, he came to argue
• 22:42
  with me, he came to fight. Then I told
• 22:44
  him I had nothing more to
• 22:45
  say to him, that I already had.
• 22:46
  Come here, Rodrigo. No, that's a lie.
• 22:51
  Then I already said I already had. I'd already said
• 22:52
  everything I had to say to him, I'd
• 22:54
  finished everything. Then he went and
• 22:56
  messaged my mom with a picture
• 22:59
  from her Instagram, saying she
• 23:03
  was covering for me going out with another
• 23:05
  man.
• 23:06
  I said, "No, this guy is so stupid."
• 23:08
  He saw me kissing her and swore she
• 23:11
  was covering for me. I went out with another
• 23:14
  man. That's what happens when a
• 23:15
  guy suddenly wants to be the other man's lover.
• 23:17
  He wants to be the other man's lover.
• 23:18
  Suddenly the masturbation scene became less
• 23:20
  bad. It
• 23:21
  became very bad, did
• 23:22
  n't it? It was like, damn, the guy saw her
• 23:24
  kissing the other woman, did
• 23:25
  he? I
• 23:26
  know,
• 23:29
  there's another guy involved.
• 23:31
  It has to be, it has to be. That
• 23:32
  's the only possible conclusion. I know
• 23:34
  my wife,
• 23:36
  she wouldn't do that.
• 23:38
  Exactly. He came and said
• 23:39
  that too.
• 23:40
  He said you, you sons of [ __ ],
• 23:43
  think the same way. He said
• 23:44
  that I already see disregard,
• 23:47
  for God's sake. That's not it. But wait, I
• 23:48
  said, "There you go
• 23:49
  ." He came and sent the picture.
• 23:51
  Yeah, he sent the picture to... My mother. And
• 23:52
  so, here's the thing, my mother is a
• 23:54
  coordinator at the school where she works; she's
• 23:56
  in the office, and I was a teacher.
• 23:58
  Her mother replied, "Isn't she beautiful?
• 24:00
  " My mother didn't know that
• 24:02
  she had broken up with the teacher from the same
• 24:05
  year as the girl's mother; she had broken up with...
• 24:08
  No, my mother turned to her and said,
• 24:10
  "Stop being crazy, girl, she
• 24:11
  's married."
• 24:13
  Oh [ __ ].
• 24:15
  But she, damn it, guys.
• 24:16
  Because my mother didn't know she
• 24:17
  had broken up. My mother thought
• 24:18
  she was married.
• 24:19
  Look, the human mind is very
• 24:20
  beautiful.
• 24:21
  Everyone invented a story for
• 24:22
  themselves, man. Wow, crazy, damn it. Everyone
• 24:24
  went into denial at the same time about
• 24:26
  things,
• 24:26
  man. A lot of theory. Lost became Lost. What
• 24:28
  madness.
• 24:28
  And then, how did it resolve itself? It did
• 24:29
  n't resolve itself. I had to kiss in
• 24:31
  front of everyone.
• 24:32
  Then, after 10 days, he came to my
• 24:34
  house making vows of love, bringing
• 24:36
  flowers, bringing things because he understood that I was
• 24:38
  n't going to get back with him, that I didn't want to.
• 24:39
  Nothing more.
• 24:40
  Pedro didn't tell him, why doesn't
• 24:41
  Gustavo Lima stay and you
• 24:43
  don't?
• 24:45
  And he didn't realize that every time he
• 24:46
  went there, the scissors were all razor-sharp. Did you
• 24:52
  notice the traction on the furniture in the house? Then
• 24:54
  when he agreed, he went in with the
• 24:56
  lawyer so we could separate the house,
• 24:58
  and the lawyer was her.
• 24:59
  No, no, now it's the current one.
• 25:03
  She left the kiss. Excuse me, I
• 25:04
  need a lawyer
• 25:07
  because, you know?
• 25:08
  No, now the current lawyer who did it is
• 25:10
  his current sister-in-law.
• 25:11
  Hmm.
• 25:11
  His sister-in-law.
• 25:13
  And he, and is there
• 25:14
  a lawsuit going on? I don't think so. No,
• 25:16
  we already separated because since we did
• 25:18
  n't have a common-law marriage, it was just a
• 25:20
  dissolution of the partnership.
• 25:21
  Okay,
• 25:21
  I understand.
• 25:22
  I understand. Everything's alright then in the end
• 25:24
  . Everything's alright.
• 25:25
  That's good, that's good. Sensational. That was
• 25:26
  the audience's history. Excellent.
• 25:29
  Leave your like, subscribe to the channel,
• 25:31
  happy ladies, we're
• 25:32
  live here. If you want to
• 25:35
  tell your story One day, come here and
• 25:37
  watch the Par na Rede show. Tell
• 25:38
  your story. We're ready to
• 25:39
  listen. Done.