Latest / Virtuous Leaders with Dr. Johann D'Souza / Ep.94 - Andrew Hickman: The Words You Use Are Sabotaging Your Sainthood | Catholic Personal Development | Mindset Coaching Faith | Language Pattern Healing
Transcript
- 0:00Mindset is the story you tell yourself.
- 0:06It is the story you tell yourself.
- 0:10What are what are stories made-up of?
- 0:13Words and breath. Words and breath.
- 0:17Those are the ones and zeros of mindset.
- 0:21This is Virtuous Leaders, the podcast for based Catholics who
- 0:24will speak truth, do good, or die trying.
- 0:27Here's the show. Andy, you help creators
- 0:35rediscover and live their divine identity through sacred and
- 0:38prophetic acts of love. I, I actually laughed out loud
- 0:43when I read that. That was so cool and powerful
- 0:46and also abstruse. I think it's a technical term.
- 0:51So can you, can you just walk us through what you do and and why?
- 0:56Yes. So before you hit record, Johann
- 1:02was giving me a hard time and saying like, what are you, you
- 1:05know, is this like a bunch of is this a hippie movement?
- 1:09Yes and no. So the what this ultimately is,
- 1:14this is heal is a personal development coaching practice
- 1:20for Catholics. And what we coach Catholics in
- 1:24is a specific system for organizing your life.
- 1:29And the specific goal of that system is to help you become a
- 1:33St. That's that's the short of it.
- 1:36There's three principles. And that's awesome, dude.
- 1:39Yeah, let's get into the principles.
- 1:41Peace. OK, cool, we'll buckle up.
- 1:43We start off nice and gradual. Principle number one is be God.
- 1:48So we are coming from the belief that God from all eternity, not
- 1:54because we disobeyed him and then he had a Plan B, but from
- 1:59all eternity desire to share not just part of his life, but all
- 2:04of his life entirety with us. And we we see this in the person
- 2:09of Jesus Christ. So Jesus Christ defines not only
- 2:13saves humanity, but also defines it.
- 2:15And who is Jesus? He is one person at the same
- 2:18time. He is fully God and fully man.
- 2:21So our first principle with heal is that that's the end game, is
- 2:26that we are are designing our lives to become fully full
- 2:33participants in the divine nature.
- 2:35So that's principle number one. Now you tell me if there needs
- 2:38to be any either damage control or qualifications or sources or
- 2:44whatever. Sometimes that that freaks
- 2:46people out, sometimes it excites them.
- 2:49What's your initial response to principle One?
- 2:53Yeah, I can see how it can be misunderstood, especially in
- 2:56like a quasi gnostic context. But I think for.
- 3:00My audience, they, they're tracking pretty clearly here, so
- 3:04I love it. Cool.
- 3:06OK, yeah, that's quasi Gnostic. That's that's we'll get well,
- 3:10you know what that lead that's a good transition to principle
- 3:14number 21 time. I was talking with a buddy who's
- 3:20in the New Age movement, and he was, you know, we were talking
- 3:24spirituality and he thought that he was, you know, building a
- 3:29bridge. And he's like, yeah, man, I'm
- 3:30like, I'm what did he say? I'm a I'm a spiritual being
- 3:35having a human experience. I'm a spiritual being having a
- 3:40human experience. So part of what the Gnostics got
- 3:44wrong was thinking that physical things are in opposition to
- 3:50spiritual things and by extension, human nature is in
- 3:55opposition to the divine nature. Again, Jesus Christ clarifies
- 4:01this. They are not in opposition.
- 4:04One of my favorite lines on that is let me pull this up here,
- 4:14will you? You get this when you look at
- 4:18like the tradition of, of how the church has developed its
- 4:21understanding of of the Trinity and then also of the person of
- 4:27Jesus Christ. The the shortest like line that
- 4:32I really like to quote is from Saint Pope Leo, the 1st doctor
- 4:37of the Church obviously. And he says God has not changed
- 4:41his describing the incarnation. God has not changed by his
- 4:44compassion, nor is man swallowed up by such dignity.
- 4:50For each nature does what is proper to each in communion with
- 4:54the other. So principle number 2 is
- 4:58clarifying what does a holy life look like?
- 5:05The average Christian is thinking God is holding back on
- 5:11them, is threatened by their growth and in some way can't be
- 5:16trusted. They wouldn't say that out loud,
- 5:19but that that's what's operating in the heart.
- 5:23And so they think that they the the sort of the extent of their
- 5:28Christian life is to be subservient to God and to to let
- 5:37him remain as their master. The sort of like a rare, rare
- 5:46group in that or a rare subgroup, there are those who
- 5:50take God at His word and understand that He is calling
- 5:53them into His own life. But even if you're talking to
- 5:58that group of people, you still have the majority of them
- 6:02working under a misconception of what that looks like.
- 6:05What does it look like to participate in the divine
- 6:08nature? Most or many Christians conceive
- 6:15that as primarily a negation of the self.
- 6:21That's most individuals conceive this primarily as a negation of
- 6:24the self. Yes, as a negation of the self.
- 6:27So again, this is not saying that the average Christians
- 6:32walking around explicitly saying this, but it's, it's an image
- 6:37that is operating in the back of their mind.
- 6:40Ultimately, you could bring it down to a misunderstanding of
- 6:43Galatians 220. It is no longer I who live, but
- 6:46Christ who lives in me and the picture of holiness is that, OK,
- 6:51here's God, here's me and I, I have this high vision.
- 6:57It's not like I'm saying that I'm not called to participate in
- 7:01divine nature. I am saying that I'm called to
- 7:03participate in the divine nature.
- 7:05The only problem is that I have this conception that divinity
- 7:10somehow destroys or chews up or dissolves whatever it makes
- 7:15contact with. So that under the name of self
- 7:19sacrifice or under the name of, you know, generosity or
- 7:24humility, I pursue a life in which I slowly erode myself in
- 7:32order to melt into God. And so principle number 2 is to
- 7:36safeguard against that misunderstanding.
- 7:39And principle number 2 is be yourself.
- 7:42So principle #1 be God, principle #2 be yourself.
- 7:46These are simultaneously operative and the third
- 7:52principle. And then we can kind of pick
- 7:53around and, you know, we can kind of go into deeper parts.
- 7:58Whatever you find most interesting.
- 8:01The third principle is to be fruitful.
- 8:03So OK, wait. I am not only called to
- 8:07participate fully in the life of God.
- 8:10The way I participate in that is not despite myself, but it is
- 8:14through myself. Once self is properly understood
- 8:18as in the image of God that He created, that exists in you at
- 8:23your core, that is not, you know, what is, what is
- 8:32substantially there rather than what is not there when we sin.
- 8:38So not only am I called to participate in His life, how I
- 8:42do that is not by changing who I am at my core, but but receiving
- 8:49who I am at my core. And then how is that?
- 8:53How is that actually lived out? So the third principle is to be
- 8:58fruitful. So Heal is working from an
- 9:00understanding that not only is the self properly understood,
- 9:05not only is the self sacred, but work itself is sacred as well.
- 9:12So when I express myself through my work, I am not hitting a
- 9:18spiritual pause button. I'm not engaging in some kind of
- 9:23necessary evil, but it is in the mundane that I experience and
- 9:31participate in the mystical. So there's three principles
- 9:35again, be God, be yourself and be fruitful.
- 9:39And we can go deeper on any one of those three, but any what
- 9:44initially attracts you were or what's a an initial question
- 9:49that you have based off of that overview?
- 9:53How does that apply to helping professionals in their workflow?
- 9:59OK. That's my understanding of what
- 10:01you do. Correct me if I'm.
- 10:02Wrong. Yes.
- 10:03OK. So how does it the way that
- 10:08you're think is seeing it right now, how does it not apply?
- 10:14I guess I'm looking for practical takeaways.
- 10:17So it's not so much that it's in conflict, it's more just I'm
- 10:20curious, OK, well, what are the practical strategies that you
- 10:23recommend? Yes.
- 10:25OK, cool. So just like how in the person
- 10:31of Jesus, the the divine and the human coexist, we're working
- 10:37from a standpoint that the that the theoretical or the
- 10:40philosophical coexist with the practical.
- 10:45So the, the first point here is to allow the Christian to wake
- 10:52up and hear with full clarity what exactly the purpose of
- 10:57their life is. Not only the purpose, but also
- 11:00the shape and color of it. If you are working with someone
- 11:05who is, you know, burnt out and they're, they're struggling with
- 11:10work life and balance and, and you know, they haven't actually
- 11:15been present with their kids on a vacation in 10 years.
- 11:20The, I'll argue the least practical thing you can do is
- 11:24start handing them a planner or give them these tips and tricks
- 11:29or life hacks on how they're going to clear through their
- 11:31e-mail faster. None of that is actually waking
- 11:34up or breaking through the crust of why they're there in the 1st
- 11:37place. The, the mean most practical
- 11:42truth is who we are called to be and how that looks.
- 11:49So, so first and foremost, pausing and letting ourselves do
- 11:56a double take on these initial principles.
- 12:00What if we understood them as something practical rather than
- 12:05as something relegated to the abstract?
- 12:08What would that, what would that really mean?
- 12:12Well, a couple things. One, it would mean that if I am
- 12:18currently conceiving of my, my day-to-day decisions as somehow
- 12:25this new spiritually neutral thing in which I am OK, I need a
- 12:34sort of like operate. I need to pay the bills.
- 12:36So I'll interact with these things, but I can't wait till I
- 12:41get a break so that I can pray during the day.
- 12:46The the first thing is to have that misconception shattered.
- 12:51Now, if if that's all it is. So the argument there is that
- 12:59you, you, we have to start there.
- 13:01We have to start there. Does it end there?
- 13:06No, that's the beginning of the practical piece.
- 13:10A continuation of the practical piece is when we drill into that
- 13:15third principle of be fruitful. So when we talk about a fruitful
- 13:21life, the next most practical, practical thing to understand is
- 13:27that there are three main areas in our life where we want to
- 13:33experience or or create fruitfulness.
- 13:38When someone is experiencing some sort of imbalance, usually
- 13:42they would think of it as as work life imbalance.
- 13:45It's ultimately an imbalance in these three areas.
- 13:49So those these three areas are their time introduce their
- 13:55emotion and mindset and their knowledge and wisdom.
- 13:59We talked about that as their hands, their heart and their
- 14:05head. If if we want to be fully
- 14:09ourselves, we want to be fully operating in all three of those
- 14:14areas, the common mistake is either to only focus on one of
- 14:25those areas. So that could be like, if you
- 14:29only focus on the hands, you become the, you know, super
- 14:33successful fancy multi founder person who's who doesn't
- 14:41actually like hanging out with his wife or his kids don't
- 14:45really talk to him. That's overdoing the hands and
- 14:48forgetting the other pieces. Or you can be this super smart
- 14:55academic person, but you've you're crippled by social
- 14:59anxiety and you don't know how to manage the day-to-day.
- 15:02So you're always late or lost in your papers or whatever that is
- 15:06overdoing the head and missing the balance of the hands and the
- 15:10and the heart. Or you can be the sort of
- 15:14forever healer with, you know, 10 different therapists for 20
- 15:20years of your life perpetually talking about healing, present
- 15:27tense, never achieving a state of being healed or experiencing
- 15:33A healed life. And that is an imbalance of only
- 15:36the heart that doesn't know how to connect to the, to the hands
- 15:39or the the head. So that is mistake #1 common
- 15:47mistake number one is to forget that there's three areas and to
- 15:50only be thinking of 1. Common mistake number 2 is to
- 15:54think you need to have three different systems in order to
- 15:59maintain fruitfulness in those three areas.
- 16:05And the the alternative, which is a lot easier, is to have a
- 16:10single system that is able to scale all three areas.
- 16:15Now, before I say anything else, let's sync up with each other.
- 16:21I said that because you asked how does this affect the, you
- 16:26know, everyday Catholic professional?
- 16:29How does this get practical? How does that relate to your
- 16:35question and does it create further follow up questions?
- 16:40Yeah, I think. Just you asking that question is
- 16:43a good coaching strategy which I appreciate and I was reflecting
- 16:48as you're speaking. I think what's going to make
- 16:50this most effective for me to understand and perhaps it for
- 16:53the audience as well. Nice is to do some micro
- 16:57coaching here so that that way. We're.
- 16:59Applying it to a specific example, so so.
- 17:02How would you? You're talking to me.
- 17:04You're coaching me. Where?
- 17:06Where do we? Go from here.
- 17:08Realizing that I know we have much less time than you would in
- 17:11a normal coaching session. OK, cool.
- 17:13So what we'll do is I'll explain the the number one like biggest
- 17:20universal thing that needs to be happening there and then we can
- 17:23play some smaller contained games that'll demonstrate some
- 17:30things that relate to the area of the heart.
- 17:34OK, so overall, most important principle is to maintain
- 17:42connection with the senses. If you're stressed out or
- 17:45overwhelmed or apathetic or whatever, a major lever is that
- 17:52you are disconnected from your physical senses.
- 17:58A the rookie mistake is to think.
- 18:01The main thing to do is to think more about your life.
- 18:04Thinking more about your life is going to keep you in the cycle.
- 18:07And it's a fancy and disguised version of overthinking.
- 18:11What you really want to do, whether it's in the heart, the
- 18:14hands, or the head, and I'll demonstrate this in a second, is
- 18:18you want to incorporate the physical senses.
- 18:20That's how you get out of overthinking and that's how you
- 18:24get into making sense. And I mean that very literally.
- 18:28So Aquinas talks about the physical senses being the
- 18:31material cause of intellectual knowledge.
- 18:35We are not designed to interface with either the things that we
- 18:40want or the problems that we're perceiving.
- 18:43We're not. We're not designed to interface
- 18:45with those simply up in our head.
- 18:50Now the current of our time is such that we tend to live a very
- 18:58virtual low sensorial lifestyle. We sit in a chair and we stare
- 19:06at a screen and we don't really use our body that much.
- 19:11So we have this low grade inclination of OK, I start to
- 19:15feel some dissonance and I go straight up into my head.
- 19:19So the first main thing we want to do is we want to incorporate
- 19:23the physical senses. So writing is the easiest way
- 19:27that you can do that. If you're stressed out about
- 19:30something, write out what you are stressed about and why
- 19:35you're currently feeling stressed.
- 19:37And maybe once you start writing that sentence, you'll realize
- 19:40what is stress actually the emotion that I'm feeling?
- 19:43Or is there a different word here that relates?
- 19:47So if I were working with you or you're working with me, the
- 19:50first thing I would do is I would instruct you to write one
- 19:54to two paragraphs about what you would want help with because
- 19:58that immediately brings you to your senses.
- 20:01You start touching the thing, you start seeing the thing, and
- 20:06then I would instruct you to read it out loud because then
- 20:09you're going to start hearing it.
- 20:11You'll also feel the vibrations of the words, which is very
- 20:14important and helping you make sense.
- 20:17So that's how we would typically do it.
- 20:23And any thoughts on on that initial response?
- 20:28No, I'm following you. Let's keep going.
- 20:31OK, cool, sweet. So how does that actually play
- 20:36out in a way that we can condense to the time that we
- 20:39have? Well, here's how we can condense
- 20:42it. Let's look at the area of the
- 20:44heart. This is your mindset and your
- 20:50emotions. What you believe is going to be
- 20:53tied up with what you feel, and vice versa, what you feel is
- 20:56going to be tied up with what you believe.
- 20:59Now, Doctor Johann, how would you?
- 21:03What's your current rough draft definition of mindset?
- 21:09Mindset. Something about your attitude
- 21:13towards reality? Nice.
- 21:18OK, cool. Awesome to the listener.
- 21:22If you want a really hard to practice definition Google
- 21:29mindset, you'll get something along the lines of something a
- 21:33fixed disposition, as in it's already set in stone, so good
- 21:39luck operating with it. Usually you'll get some
- 21:42combination of it's it's, it's your destiny.
- 21:45And here's a bunch of fancy academic, scholarly sounding
- 21:50words that you have no idea how to interface with.
- 21:54A The most practical definition of mindset is mindset is the
- 21:58story you tell yourself. What are stories made-up of
- 22:03words and breath Words and breath.
- 22:07That's those are the ones and zeros of mindset.
- 22:11If you want to have a healthy mindset, you want to create a
- 22:14healthy mindset, You want to be skilled with your words and you
- 22:17want to be skilled with your breath.
- 22:19Now we will play a game here that isolates the variable of
- 22:25words. If we want to incorporate
- 22:28breath, that would be a longer conversation.
- 22:31There are a set of key containers of words.
- 22:39You could say patterns of words that once you see it, you can't
- 22:43Unsee it. And whenever someone is clogged
- 22:47up, it is ultimately due to in at least in part.
- 22:52I mean, it's a mechanical issue at the level of words.
- 22:55So what do I mean by that? Let's play a couple language
- 22:58games and then we'll call it good.
- 23:01So do you have a something that you can write on or write with?
- 23:11OK, cool. Let's play three language games.
- 23:19Here's the first language game I'd like you to play.
- 23:27I want you to write the following words down.
- 23:32How? And dear listener, please play
- 23:34along. How will I ever dot dot dot?
- 23:44How will I ever dot dot dot? OK, now I want you to fill in
- 23:50your own dot dot dot. So make it a complete sentence
- 23:54in the form of a question. Change the world.
- 23:58Awesome. Cool, so actually write that in.
- 24:02OK. OK, and now you're seeing that
- 24:09sentence. Cool.
- 24:12Read it out loud. How will I ever?
- 24:15Change the world. OK, how does that sentence feel
- 24:22to say out loud? On the one hand, maybe a little
- 24:25bit naive or embarrassing, and on the other hand it's helpful
- 24:29to have the some concrete. Clarity.
- 24:33OK, cool. OK, great.
- 24:37How about the naive or embarrassing feeling?
- 24:43Let's say 1 is low, 10 is high. What's the degree of that
- 24:47feeling? 3.5. 3.5 OK nice.
- 24:52OK, very cool. So do you see?
- 24:54Look at the sentence again. OK, Do you see the word ever?
- 24:58Yeah. OK select that and delete it.
- 25:03OK, and now reread. How will I change the world?
- 25:08OK, so I heard and saw in your face something different.
- 25:13So tell me the difference. What does this version feel
- 25:15like? A lot more definitive, inspires
- 25:20confidence. I can do this.
- 25:26And did I pay you to say that? No, but you should.
- 25:30Not yet. Not yet at least.
- 25:32Appreciate it. So great.
- 25:36OK, so that word ever belongs to a category called dramatics.
- 25:41It it's pressure language. So ever, always never should.
- 25:49A lot of people are shooting on themselves.
- 25:52I should do this. I should do that.
- 25:53I should. And take out should put in
- 25:56could. It'll feel a lot better.
- 25:59It'll feel a lot better. And the words we use paints the
- 26:04images in our mind. It paints our imagination.
- 26:08And so many people have very good intention, poor
- 26:12imagination. Not because of any lack of
- 26:15innate abilities, Just they're shooting themselves in the foot
- 26:18with their own words. All right.
- 26:20You want to play two other games?
- 26:22Yeah, that was cool. OK.
- 26:24Sweet. How about this one?
- 26:36OK, I have a lot. It's a very different style.
- 26:46One, I have a lot of anxiety. OK, OK, go ahead and read that
- 26:53sentence out loud. I have a lot of anxiety.
- 26:59And again, we're not saying like, whatever, what, what, what
- 27:04kind of feeling does that kind of sentence create?
- 27:09I have. A lot of anxiety, you know,
- 27:12honestly, I'm not able to detect anything.
- 27:15Maybe because it's just not something that I would say or
- 27:19thing. Right.
- 27:22Yeah. OK.
- 27:23So then you can answer it from like the the outside vibe or
- 27:28like the objective vibe of it. So I know that you're not
- 27:31subjectively feeling something when you read that, but the the
- 27:35general vibe, what's the general vibe that that kind of sentence?
- 27:39Creates. I'm terrified the world is so
- 27:43cold. OK, nice.
- 27:44I'm all. Alone.
- 27:46I need to. I need to hire Johan D'souza.
- 27:49I need to hire Doctor D'souza. OK.
- 27:54So do you see that word have second word OK?
- 27:59Select it all right. Replace it with the word create.
- 28:07I create a lot of anxiety. Oh no.
- 28:13Am I that person? What what's, what's the?
- 28:21What's the? Oh no.
- 28:24I don't want to create anxiety in people's lives.
- 28:29OK. Oh, I guess.
- 28:31You're saying I'm creating my own anxiety, Is that?
- 28:34Is that what you're trying to hear?
- 28:36So this is about. Oh, yes, I see.
- 28:39I see. Correct.
- 28:41This is like a first person. Yeah, got it.
- 28:45OK. Oh.
- 28:46OK, I create a lot of anxiety. Oh, OK, well, hey.
- 28:50It's I can do something about this, I can change this.
- 28:53Bingo. Right.
- 28:54Exactly, exactly. So this is moving.
- 28:57Have is a is a sneaky version of what's called a projection.
- 29:03Projections do a great job of putting what you want out of
- 29:09arm's reach. It's out there.
- 29:11It's either inevitable, or it's destiny or someone else's fault
- 29:14or whatever. A reflection highlights what
- 29:20part of the situation you have control over.
- 29:25So it puts you back in the driver's seat Exactly.
- 29:28Yeah, exactly. So we can turn that up even
- 29:31more. We could, for example, between
- 29:34of and anxiety, put in the word my.
- 29:38I create a lot of my anxiety. Yeah, Yeah, it's so true.
- 29:46Thank you. So, so at first it can feel like
- 29:51a, a sucker punch or whatever, a kick in the teeth.
- 29:56In reality, this is, this is liberating because it means
- 30:03there's something we can do about it and it and it helps us
- 30:07realize that again. So like a quick example, I was
- 30:11working with a mom and she was working on organizing an emotion
- 30:22that was related to a middle school experience.
- 30:27So there was this early middle school experience in which she
- 30:33was waiting in the principal's office for a in order to
- 30:38participate for academic competition.
- 30:40And she was just, you know, scaring the crap out of herself
- 30:44and tons of pressure. And now if I was wanting to do a
- 30:52good job of not helping her, I would ask her to just verbally
- 30:55tell me all about this story. I'd make sure that she'd never
- 30:59be able to see the actual words that she's using so that she
- 31:03would just spiral and cycle in this story and either talk with
- 31:08me for a couple of sessions and then feel like it didn't go
- 31:11anywhere. Hop to another therapist, talk
- 31:13to a couple sessions, feel like it doesn't go anywhere, and talk
- 31:15yourself in circles. Luckily, I didn't do that.
- 31:18I had her write out this story. And so because we wrote out that
- 31:21story, we got to see a very little interesting sentence in
- 31:25that story, which was I loved academic competitions and they
- 31:32took it away from me. Yikes.
- 31:39Well, that's an interesting response.
- 31:43We looked at the structure of that sentence.
- 31:45Again, a lot of this is mechanical thing.
- 31:47We took out they and we put an I, I loved academic competitions
- 31:53and I took it away from me and and let her stare at that
- 32:02without smarty pants, without, you know, look what you've done,
- 32:09vibe with honest, open curiosity without any judgement.
- 32:13And what does that do that that she she lit up.
- 32:16She's like, well, if I took it away from me, I can give it
- 32:19back. Yes, good job.
- 32:23I can give it back. And so then, you know, two
- 32:26months later, she's telling me how she's getting back into
- 32:30reading and writing, and she's picking up all these other
- 32:32hobbies because, one, she realized that her emotions are
- 32:39an area of her life that can be organized.
- 32:43And two, she used all her physical senses to participate
- 32:49in that organization. She didn't just talk about it
- 32:53and only hear it. She was able to see it and touch
- 32:57it and then therefore create a lot more fruit out of it.
- 33:02Shall we end with one other game?
- 33:07God, they will have to do this one quick though.
- 33:10OK, cool, it'll be one more for the listener and but do also
- 33:15write this sentence out. We won't do a debrief.
- 33:17We'll just we'll do the change and then you close with whatever
- 33:22you would like and cool. So write out these words.
- 33:25Dear listener, I surrender to God's will for my life, even if
- 33:38that means an outcome that I don't want.
- 33:48All my life's where it collapses for my eyes.
- 33:56This isn't a joke, Andy. This isn't a laughing.
- 33:58Matter did you have you have a great dry delivery?
- 34:05OK, so I surrender to God's will for my life, even if that means
- 34:10an outcome that I don't want. Please read that sentence out
- 34:13loud. I surrender to God's will for my
- 34:16life, even if that means all my life's work collapses before my
- 34:19eyes. It's liberating.
- 34:21I like that. OK, cool.
- 34:24Sweet. So we've talked about dramatics
- 34:27to moderations that was taking out even we've talked about a
- 34:32projection to a reflection that is I have a lot of anxiety to I
- 34:37create a lot of my anxiety. Now we're going to play with
- 34:41something that's called a negation and negation is what is
- 34:44not the case, what you don't want, what you don't believe,
- 34:47what you don't like, blah, blah, blah, flipping it to what is the
- 34:50case, what you do want, what what you do feel, etcetera.
- 34:55So you see that second to last word Johan don't I want you to
- 35:02select the N, the apostrophe and the T and I want you to delete
- 35:06it and then re read the entire sentence.
- 35:12Wait, I don't. Sorry.
- 35:13There's no don't in here. You should have the following
- 35:18sentence on your document. I surrender to God's will for my
- 35:22life, even if that means an outcome that I don't want.
- 35:28Oh. Oh, oh, sorry.
- 35:31I thought I was supposed to. I thought that was like
- 35:33parenthetical and I was supposed to put the outcome that I don't.
- 35:36Want no, put that whole thing in.
- 35:39Yeah, yeah. Even if that means an outcome
- 35:41that I don't want. OK, even if that means an
- 35:43outcome that I do want. I've never thought of it like
- 35:47that. I surrender to God's will for my
- 35:51life. Even if that means an outcome
- 35:53that I do want. All right, this is this is a
- 35:57head scratcher here. Yeah.
- 36:03It's like giving me permission to be successful.
- 36:07Take out the like, it's like giving me permission to be
- 36:11successful. It's giving me permission to be
- 36:14successful. It's giving me.
- 36:15Permission to be. It's giving me permission to be
- 36:17successful. You're good it.
- 36:20Look at the sentence. It's giving me permission to be
- 36:24successful. No, no, I had.
- 36:25To change it to I, I'm giving you.
- 36:27Permission to be successful. I'm giving me permission to be
- 36:31successful. Darn it, I'm giving me
- 36:36permission. To are you giving or is it
- 36:38already given? I give permission.
- 36:40Oh, wow, I give. Yeah.
- 36:43So there's there's. We're playing OK, but I.
- 36:47Don't know how you do this. This kind of jiu jitsu, this
- 36:50verbal jiu jitsu worthy of a analytical philosopher.
- 36:55Are you an analytical philosopher?
- 36:58Who knows that? Was a good response.
- 37:03An analytical philosopher would say that.
- 37:06Worth it. So I know, I know we're at we're
- 37:10at time. How would you like to wrap
- 37:12things up? Why don't you pitch where people
- 37:15can't find you? OK, So you said, I never thought
- 37:21about it that way. That is a large part of
- 37:25mechanical opportunity. So the words that we use shape
- 37:31the thoughts that we have and the images that we paint in our
- 37:34mind and the feelings that we feel in our heart.
- 37:39You can learn this. It is a learnable skill.
- 37:43It's not complicated and we can focus on that.
- 37:48There's 4 main patterns. If you'd like to learn more
- 37:51about those patterns, how that plays into your mindset, and if
- 37:55you'd like to learn a method for organizing your life that
- 37:58doesn't just extend to mindset, but also is applicable to how
- 38:02you organize your to do lists. Also how you've organized your
- 38:06knowledge. If you're a writer or thinker or
- 38:09speaker, come to our website www.heal.co.
- 38:15That is HE l.co. Poke around, click the buttons,
- 38:24and I've written a series of letters in which I explained
- 38:27these principles and all that can be read for free going to
- 38:31our website, heal.co. Thank you, Andy, thanks for
- 38:37listening. Please like, subscribe and share
- 38:39with your friends. See you next time.