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Breaking the Guilt Cycle: How to Move On After a Bad Eating Day (Without Starting Over) · FitMitTuro Fitness Podcast

• 1:21
  Turo Virta (Zoom): Hey and welcome back to the fit me Turo fitness Podcast. Today, I want to talk about something that comes up again and again with my coaching clients. It's that moment after a tough day with food, maybe you over ate, maybe turned into a pinch, or maybe it was just one of those days where nothing went as planned, and now you feel guilty, maybe ashamed, maybe even a bit hopeless, if you have been there, this episode is for you. And let me say it first, clearly and loud, you are not broken. One bad day does not undo all your progress.
• 1:59
  Turo Virta (Zoom): And I repeat it, you are not broken, one bad day does not undo all your progress, because that really is what all matters.
• 2:09
  Turo Virta (Zoom): And I hope it really sinks in in your mind. And today, I want to show you how to bounce back, not with punishment, but with compassion and clarity. So let's get started that so why you feel so guilty and why it's actually not even your fault. So let me start with the basics. So most people think that if they mess up their eating, their The answer is to double down, skip the meals next day, punish themselves with the exercise of the next morning. You know you have to run your calories, burn your calories, all what you were overeating and or restrict even more. But the honest truth is that the guilt cycle keeps you stuck, and because you are always repeating the same cycle, you are overeating at some point, because it's not there is nothing wrong with you. There is not single person who is never overeating, or you think that once it's fixed, it will never happen again. Then what happens after that? Of course, you feel guilty. You are going to restrict even more again. You feel deprived, and you are going to pinch again. So if this sounds familiar, this isn't about lack of willpower. It's often emotional eating, triggered by stress, loneliness, boredom, or even just being too hungry because of past restriction. And the goal today isn't to be perfect, it's to break that cycle. So what to do right after the bad eating day, or what you might be calling bad eating day, I like to reframe it and call it in joyful eating day. So because it's, it's the first thing is that you should listen how you talk to yourself, and remove these kind of phrases, what you phrases, what you might be using, like that.
• 4:15
  Turo Virta (Zoom): There is a good to good food or bad food. I had a bad day. I had a good day. It's instead, if you like, start to think it like that. Okay, I had a little bit more in joyfulness, in my diet.
• 4:29
  Turo Virta (Zoom): I had more flexibility. And it's not always black and white or good or bad, and reframing those phrases, words, what you are talking when we are having that kind of that self talk with ourselves. So when you have had a that rough day with the food, and here is what I want you to do the next morning. So rule number one is there is no punishment, and it means that do not skip your breakfast. Do not do any extra cardio. Eat as normally as possible, because your body doesn't need punishment. It needs re regulation. And what I mean by that, why you should, because it makes kind of logic sense that if you have been you are trying to eat in a calorie deficit, you went over on your calories and that you think that now I have to compensate those calories, because now I was big overeating. I need to my especially for those women who are tracking their calories, you might see that, okay, I'm whatever your calorie call is, I use simple example. If it's a 2000 per day, and you are, you went for you 845, 1000 calories, which is relatively easy to eat, you know, one day, and then you think that now next day, I have to that I'm able to stick with my calorie budget for a whole week. I need to restrict myself.
• 6:05
  Turo Virta (Zoom): I have to it's a simple way to do it. I just skip the breakfast or I do some extra cardio that I can burn little bit more calories. And what actually happens is that you are recreating that cycle. You start it again. And the thing what I what I recommend is that, of course, you don't need to have, maybe you're depending, like, what kind of person you are, but you don't need to have, like, the full breakfast. So instead of but eat something, at least something. And usually I wouldn't start to skip anything.
• 6:45
  Turo Virta (Zoom): I wouldn't change anything for breakfast, because that is, for me, it's the most important meal if you do like, of course, there are people who are doing like intermittent fasting, and that's a different story. Or or you don't need to do use a workout as a punishment, because they are, those are the methods that are actually causing you feel even worse. And kind of learning your brain that, that there is always a reward restriction, and then some kind of price or or what you are, what you are getting if you are able to do it and and this is for your brain, so important. So if you want to move something, go for a walk, do your extra strength or do your strength training as if, if it's in your plan, but you don't need to do something extra, like what I like to use it like, in these cases, when it happens to me, I don't, I never punish myself with the workout. I might still work out there is, I'm not telling that you shouldn't work out, but if you do, for example, strength training. I think always that for me after a week, and for example, if I happen to eat more than I plan to do on Sunday and on Monday. I have a My strength training plan, as it always is, so I think that, okay, what actually happened?
• 8:16
  Turo Virta (Zoom): I'm I'm going to have a lot more energy during my workout, so using that extra energy to boost your workouts, and you have lot more strength, you probably are going to see that, Wow, you are going to you are able to use you do more reps, use heavier weights when you have that extra energy. So use it as a tool to boost your workouts, and not to use as a punishment or do something extra to burn calories. So that is step number one, and by far the most important thing. Then step number two is hydrate and move gently. So often after overeating, you are feeling bloated or sluggish, and a big glass of water and walk can do wonders. So this is just, just when you are hydrating, you are everything is going going to be so much easier, and you are not.
• 9:19
  Turo Virta (Zoom): You are still keeping your system going. And if you take it just walk, it's also for your mental health, very, very beneficial. So nothing in sense intense, just movement and hydration. And step number three, what to do after right after bad eating day is to go back to your habits, not your rules. So the difference is the key habits are flexible and the rules are very, really good. So focus on the habits that you come to so rules like protein at every meal, some fiber like think veggies or fruits or or whole all grain products and three liters of water, then 7000 steps or or if you maybe your goal is 10,000 but whatever your number is, and you don't need to be extreme.
• 10:19
  Turo Virta (Zoom): You just need to return to normal and think it like that, think and act like nothing happened. So when you get back into those old habits, it you remove that feel guilt and shame. It says that you think that it was just one back day and things, these are these things are happening and and there is nothing you need to do.
• 10:46
  Turo Virta (Zoom): It's just all. What you need to do is to get back on your normal things. Because one day, like, think it if you think it's opposite, like, if you think like that, how you are talking to yourself like you are.
• 10:57
  Turo Virta (Zoom): Because we are. We all have like or at least most of the people are focusing only on those negative things. And it's not the things that what is, what you are going to do after a good day, what you would call, if you call like I, I call it a normal day, or are, but if you have, if you are, if you have been using these good and bad days, and you might think that, okay, I did everything, what I try to learn like those my habits, I'm going to have protein at every meal. I had some fiber. I had a lot of water, I had my steps in. And if you if you had all those things day before, what you are going to do next day, you are not going to, hopefully celebrate.
• 11:46
  Turo Virta (Zoom): And now I did it for one day, and the next day I'm going to see amazing results, or I'm suddenly going to feel like skinnier or thinner or whatever word you are using. But I think, though this is just a normal thing, okay, of course, you need to celebrate, also your actions at some point or or otherwise, you will feel just so deprived, because if you, if you never celebrate your habits or actions, it's you will not be able to. You will feel always so much guilt and shame when you don't, because that will, anyways happen, but that celebrating and what do you think what you would do after a good day? Probably you you're gonna do exactly the same thing, trying to do exactly the same thing next day. And because you know that progress is made within the it's a combination of repeating same good habits over and over again, and it's nothing about being perfect. It's nothing about being being able to follow every single rule what you make for yourself. It's trying to repeat those habits you have created, which are flexible and and when you are able to repeat those habits as often as possible. It's, it's a great praise. What I was reading in my I think it's my favorite book, atomic habits, habits, from James clear, and you are some of your habits. So if you think that it's, it's in a long term, let's take it in a just don't think it over a week or over over a day. Think it like let's say for over one year, you have these habits. If you are able to re repeat them like most days, you are going to have such, more such, much more like progress than if you think like that, oh, one bad day, and then you know, you feel guilt and same it, you repeat, you restrict. You are think that now what is the point? You gain some scale weight or or, like most people, what day? What happens after a good, bad eating day?
• 14:10
  Turo Virta (Zoom): And then, you know, it gets you off track for several days. And in this old method, you are going to dig yourself into a deeper hole. And if you just think it, you know, I'm my goal is to have these habits like, instead of thinking like longer term, you can think it, it's over a year, over a month, I'm able to repeat and stay consistent with these habits.
• 14:35
  Turo Virta (Zoom): Like, goal is not to be 100% perfect, but if you are, let's say that your goal is to get some kind of results, visible results, your call should be somewhere around, aiming for 80% consistency. And if you have, for example, I gave you now four examples, protein, fiber, water and steps, if you are able to repeat these habits for the next let's say, from calendar month 80% it means that it's around 24 days and other six days. You can it. You don't need to do them.
• 15:18
  Turo Virta (Zoom): But let's say that it's you are 80% consistent. It you still have room for your cheat days not being perfect, and you are still going to see amazing results. But if that one that day of eating is going to put you off track, that's probably the reason why you are not going to going to see progress. And the next day, what I wanted to talk is, is one trick to stay consistent all week, all week.
• 15:50
  Turo Virta (Zoom): So this is a super practical tip, what I have used myself and I share with many of my clients.
• 15:54
  Turo Virta (Zoom): So because most people you know, you think that your calendar week, it's from, it's like it is. It's from Monday to Sunday, and then you are you are planning that you know you are on spot on from Monday to Friday or Thursday, and then from Friday, usually around afternoon, when work week is finishing, you start to think that I was so good. Now I kind of need to report myself a little bit. And this tip is that changing your nutritional week, like you might have your calendar week with your work and everything, it's from Monday to Sunday, but think your nutritional week and start that week on Friday. So why is that?
• 16:42
  Turo Virta (Zoom): Because, like I said, most people are trade from Monday to Thursday, and then fell off on Friday and the weekend. So if that is you, you mentally respect your week to start on Friday, and that changes everything. So you are less likely to fall in that all or nothing mindset on the weekend, because now your week is just in the beginning, and then it also shifts how you view your seat or treat day. So instead of saving it for Saturday, when you are already tired and likely to be spiral, try planning a mid week treat or seed day, maybe Wednesday. So it gives you something to look forward to, but it releases and it releases pressure from the weekend and helps those to prevent those pinches caused by restriction.
• 17:40
  Turo Virta (Zoom): So this is just a simple way to change your thinking. And if you think that, okay, my week is starting on Friday. I'm going to be on spot on and I'm planning my kind of cheat or treated day.
• 17:53
  Turo Virta (Zoom): It's going to be the end of my week, which is starting on Friday. So you are going to plan it maybe Wednesday, maybe it's Thursday, maybe Tuesday evening.
• 18:01
  Turo Virta (Zoom): So this kind of changing your mindset is that's, that's the key for chasing your weekends and opposite calendar week. It's just, it's just the basic information and and what we all know. And of course, it's, it's, it might be a bit harder to do in a practical part, but that is that has been such a game changer for for many of my clients. So let me and then the last thing, what I what I want to talk is to releasing the same and focusing on the next step.
• 18:45
  Turo Virta (Zoom): So let me say this again, you didn't fail. You are not starting over. You are just continuing. So we all over it.
• 18:54
  Turo Virta (Zoom): Sometimes we all have those emotional days. What matters the most is what you do after. So if you think, if you think like, what is the difference between those people who you might be looking up or you see in social media that how the hell they are. They can be so consistent, look amazing all year long.
• 19:18
  Turo Virta (Zoom): Like, okay, first of all, you don't know what is happening there in their life. Like, you don't know. You just don't know.
• 19:25
  Turo Virta (Zoom): You don't know what chapter they are in a book, like if you are in chapter two, they might be in chapter 56 and that comparison is not very fair. You don't you don't know what is going on in some other peoples, like in social media, you it's like 95,000 or 90% of people, they share only their either wins or either, if they're if person is negative, having a negative mindset, it's you might be seeing someone sharing only complaining about something. So think it like that. It's for every person. It's a different way, how they are using social media, where you are, where you are comparing yourself. And if you start to compare yourself with people in social media, or your friends, you know you see leader highlights or eater either only, only bad things. So it's, it's, there is a different race for every person why they are using it. And if you look like most people, they share only pictures from their holiday or something, and then or or when they are looking like you like looking their best in some photo shooting or in a beach, and the best angles lightning, and you start to look like why?
• 20:44
  Turo Virta (Zoom): Why am I looking like this and that? This one other one looks such a different and trust me, social media is not the right place to compare yourself. And what is the only difference is then that if you think that someone who is able to maintain their weight for for several years, is what you do after how you react. What is your reaction, how it's impacting your next days. When it happens because overeating and that kind of emotional eating, it happens to everyone. It happens to everyone at some point, and the only difference is that how fast you are able to get back on track. So quick recap. So don't punish yourself, nourish yourself. Focus on consistent habits, not perfection, and maybe you want to start your week on Friday, not on Monday, too. If you have these kind of food rules, especially if you are struggling with weekend eating, think that your week is starting on Friday. Friday is your new Monday, and include those mid week, three days, cheat days, enjoyable days to break that. Pin cycle, pinch cycle on a weekend. And the most important thing be kind to yourself. And think the phrase is how you talk to yourself like if you find out yourself talking to yourself like that, you've fucking idiot what you did to gain that there is what is wrong with you. I you know, think it, think it, or especially in these moments when, when you happen to over it, and the next day, next day, when you feel the guilt and saying, think it, what you would say to your best friend who would come to ask your advice in this situation. So would you tell to your best friend that you fuck mediate what you just did, or would you say something else and now use that language with yourself to what you would tell to your best friend, because that is going to be the key that is going to change everything, the way, how you are talking to yourself and when you start to rephrase, it's not going to be easy. I'm that is, it's you will forget it. You won't be able to do it every day or every time. But if you remember this phrase, what do you would tell to your best friend in this situation, so think you are not alone in this food is emotional. Life is chaotic and healing your relationship with food, it takes some time, but you are doing the work. Just by listening this episode. You are choosing progress over perfection. And if this episode helped you, I would love if you would share it with a friend or left a review. It really helps get this podcast in front of others who need it. And if you need more support, check out my voting options from personal tenant turo.com and maybe we are able to help the break the cycle, and very strong in your body. Again, thank you so much for listening, and talk to you soon.