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3 steps to confidence in your eating · SAY GRACE | Weight Loss + Health for Overwhelmed Women- Stress, Busy, Consistency, Realistic, Motivation, Starting Over, No Restrictions

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Music.
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Okay, y'all, after doing this work for so long, one thing I know without a shadow
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of a doubt is that if you aren't confident in the way you eat or just like the
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way you approach food and movement and how to care for your body day in and day out,
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you will not stick to your goals.
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Okay, the fear of failure, the guilt, the shame, the worry that you're not doing
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it right, whatever, whether you realize it or not, deep inside of you,
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it will cause you to self-sabotage.
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So without confidence in your eating, one bad choice or one overeat can cause
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that downward spiral of shame and ultimately giving up.
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So today I'm going to give you the steps that you need to learn how to eat normal
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food while losing weight and keep it all for good, right?
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Because that's what we talk about around here, but so that you can then walk
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your weight loss journey in confidence. So I believe if you stay rooted in these
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things, then the confidence is there.
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And that way, even when you have had an overeat, right, or a binge or like a
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hard week or a hard month or whatever, you can still confidently get back to
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what you know when you are ready to do so. So.
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Let's get into it. Y'all, it is wild. In our world, like, and it just seems
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to be getting worse and worse and worse. Oh my gosh.
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But in our world, we stay distracted and we stay out of tune, right?
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Like we, I keep hearing this word this year, but it's like we disassociate with
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ourselves. Like we are present.
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We are in our body, right? But we're not present in our body.
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We're not present in our days. We're going through the motions and we're trying
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to stay distracted as often as possible. So that rant is for another podcast.
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But we can tell you like where our Facebook friend, who we haven't seen in person,
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right? We haven't seen this friend in like 10 years.
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But we can tell you where she went on her summer vacation. We can also tell
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you like how she liked it and what her favorite restaurants were and what all
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they did and what color swimsuit she wore. We can tell you all that.
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But we can't remember what we ate for lunch yesterday.
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And that is a problem. that shows that we are more distracted and more in tuned
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with other people than we are ourselves.
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And so there are a million reasons that could be the case, like why we are seeking
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out other people instead of looking inward, right?
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And again, that's another podcast for another day.
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But the moral of the story is here, we're putting ourselves on the back burner
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because we are constantly either serving others, right?
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Like our family, our job, our friends, whatever, or we're seeking a dopamine hit on our phones.
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We're seeking that distraction on our phones.
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And so I hear women all the time say they want to live a healthy lifestyle and
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they want to model it to their kids. But y'all, this actually requires looking at ourselves, right?
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It requires us staying in tune with ourselves daily, you know,
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hourly, literally by the minute, right?
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And then taking ownership.
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Of who we are and how we are, you know, without shame or judgment,
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but just being present in our body.
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And I really feel like this is a huge disconnect for a lot of women is like,
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they want to, they want to learn healthy habits to show their kids,
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or, you know, to look better on the outside, look better for their husband or
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look better in their pictures for other people.
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But like, they don't want to face the work that has to be done internally,
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like day in day out, you know, by turning inward, you know.
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And so all that to say, if we do not face ourselves, the confidence will never come.
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The weight loss that lasts will never come, right?
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Because without looking in at yourself, you're unable to recognize the things
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that may need to change or adjust or, you know, even just be aware of the habits that you have.
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And so you will not in turn create this rhythm in this routine that you know
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without a shadow of a doubt works for you.
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And so if you don't have that rhythm or routine that you know without a shadow
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of a doubt works for you in your weight loss journey, you will not have the
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confidence as you go to face the day.
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Right? Like if you don't know without a shadow of a doubt that you can actually
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have a donut and still lose weight, well, then you will listen to everyone around
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you who says, oh, I'm trying to lose weight.
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I can't eat that donut or, you know, donuts just make me pack on the pounds or whatever.
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And then what will happen? You will still want the freaking donut.
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So you will have the donut and give up on losing the weight because you don't think you can do both.
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Right. And so that is all like expectations and information that was provided to you externally.
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And you don't have that confidence within to make the choice internally.
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OK. And so today, I know that's a little in-depth, like we went a little deeper
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there. But then we're going to be for the rest of this podcast.
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But I just I feel like that is the root, you know, and so because we are too
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distracted to get to know ourselves and to look inward and to pay attention to ourselves.
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And we just want somebody to give us, you know, a checklist or we just want
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ChatGPT to lay out our meal plan or we just want, you know, all the things given
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to us because I mean, the medication.
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I mean, you know, I talked about GLP-1 several episodes ago.
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And like, if you're not willing to do this kind of work that I'm talking about
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today alongside a GLP-1, then yes, ma'am, you will be right back gaining that
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weight again after you're done with it.
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And so I just, I want to talk through like our three main focuses for how to
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start getting confident in your eating, confident in your health habits, right?
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And so I'm going to say a lot today and I want to encourage you.
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It's going to sound like, you know, just a lot of things you need to write down
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on your to-do list. But let me encourage you again.
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You don't need to take what I say and make it the rules for your life,
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right? Because we are an individual person.
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Based weight loss approach here. And so everything for everyone can look different
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based on where they are and what their needs are and what their habits are and
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what their routine is and all the things. Okay.
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And so I'm going to be saying a lot of things, but I want to encourage you to
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pull out maybe two or three that stick out the most for you specifically in your lifestyle. Okay.
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And so I'm just going to start, you know, diving into the main focuses.
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And again, you'll see what I'm talking about when I have all these examples that are going to come.
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Okay, but the first thing that you have to do to really be confident in your
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eating is to understand food.
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Okay, and I'm not talking about putting it in my fitness pal and like saying,
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oh, you know, I eat bagels every day and I've entered them into my fitness pal
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so I know that they're there every day.
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I'm talking about what what what is a bagel made
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up of like if you started noticing
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that you were hungry at 10
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a.m after having your bagel at 8 a.m and you're like why is this happening something's
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wrong with me would you have the the knowledge to say hmm maybe it's because
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this bagel is full of carbs and I'm not pairing it with any protein or fat to keep me full for a while.
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Right? Like, it's not just kind of saying, oh, I know that vegetables are good
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and fried food is bad, but like, why?
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Do you understand that fried food is breaded and put into, usually fried in
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an oil that contains a lot of saturated fat that clogs our arteries?
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Like, do you make that connection as to why fried food is, quote, bad?
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Okay, so understanding it, and this takes time, this takes, you know, leaning in.
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And so it's one of the reasons that we do track in our program is so that people can then reflect on it.
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They can say, okay, I ate this and, you know, my hunger was this way or,
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you know, see that that ran me a lot of calories and I didn't stay full for
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very long or whatever it is, right?
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Like that is one of the reasons we encourage tracking, but it doesn't just have
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to look like tracking, but it does have to look like understanding the makeup.
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So like, do you know how many calories are in certain foods that you prefer?
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Or are you just like winging it and hoping for the best?
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Do you understand how different macronutrients impact your body?
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Like everybody's on this protein kick and I think we will be for a lot longer
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because I mean protein is really great for us, right? But do you know why?
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Like do you know why? Or are you just watching the Instagram reel that says
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eat more protein to lose weight and get shredded.
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You know, like that, because that's, that's what we're seeing. We're seeing blips.
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And there's nothing wrong with reels and TikToks and all the things.
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But y'all, it is like, you are getting 5 million blips every day of things to
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do without context, without understanding behind it.
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So you are technically getting 5 million rules a day.
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And we know what we do with rules after a while, they explode in our brains,
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and we avoid them like the plague.
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And we just assume, you know, whatever the topic that rule was about is just
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not for us because we can't stick to the rule, right?
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And so if it's something you care about, which your health should be,
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something you really care about,
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you've got to put in the work, the effort,
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the time to truly understand food and why protein matters, why the different
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makeups of food matters, what nutrient density is, right?
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Like we are all about enjoying all the things here, you know, like a cookie.
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We want you to have a cookie, but we also want you to have the veggies.
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Right. And so why is that? Well, because a cookie has no nutrients and it's
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full of what I call quick sugar. So it just goes through your body real quick.
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It doesn't really help your body with much as far as, you know,
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the things it needs to do and it doesn't keep you full.
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Okay. And so if you're going to have a cookie, we also want to make sure you're
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having other things that do have nutrients in it, like vegetables,
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like protein, you know, like lean meats, that kind of stuff,
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so that you are serving your body well.
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So again, too, that you're not starving all the time. Okay.
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Or else we would just all be sitting around here eating like 16 cookies a day
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and still staying within our calorie range. Right.
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And that's, that's not going to serve us well. I mean, we can do it because
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if we understand calories, we understand that, well, we really could as long
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as we stayed under our calorie deficit, we could eat just cookies for the whole
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day and see weight loss, right?
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Like when you understand that, but we also want to understand the reasons behind
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why that may not be a good idea. And it's not a blanket rule of cookies are
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bad, vegetables are good.
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Cookies won't help you lose weight, vegetables will. Like that is not it.
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And so you have to put in the time, put in the like effort, right?
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You like you have to learn by doing with this approach.
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And that's why, I mean, we do our best in the program. My gosh,
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our ladies know we've got like so many trainings on this to help you understand information.
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Food and how it serves your body and so that you do feel equipped and confident
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and like ready to walk forward in eating the dang food, you know,
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after you have gotten this information.
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Okay, so that's like the first main focus.
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The second main focus is understanding your body.
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And y'all, our body is wild.
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And it is kind of mind-blowing to me how like some people just are not checking
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in with their body like ever at all.
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Like they are doing things to their body. They are going to the gym.
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They are going to sleep. They are taking a shower, right?
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Like they are, we are clearly in our bodies, but they're not checking in with their body.
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Like, are you overly fatigued?
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Like, should you go to the gym today?
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Should you go to sleep early? Like, are your eyes burning because they're so
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exhausted, should you put the screen down?
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Like, should you put the TV off? You know, like, these are things we don't really
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check in with ourselves about until our body is literally screaming at us.
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And then it's kind of not too late, but man, it's like a huge backtrack, you know?
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And so just understanding things about your body.
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So here are some examples, okay? How many calories or macros or ounces of water
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do you personally, you individually need each day to either maintain weight,
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lose weight, or gain weight?
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Okay, this is one that across the board is wild to me.
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You know, like we are all individuals. And so we cannot follow what your Instagram
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influencer says that she eats in a day.
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And number one, expect to stick to it, right? Right. But number two,
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expect that it's going to give us the same results.
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You know, and so you have to know, like, what do I need specifically to
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for me at this season to reach the goal I want, whether it's maintenance,
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weight loss, or weight gain, right?
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And I am saying maintenance here loudly, okay? Because a lot of people are like,
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I'm either on a weight loss journey or I'm gaining weight.
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Like there, you don't think of it as an in-between.
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But there are some seasons, y'all, and our body will demand this season sometimes.
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There are some seasons where, yes, we've lost like 10 or 15 pounds.
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And we just need to say, you know what, I'm going to maintain for the next few weeks. And that's okay.
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Maintaining is not a failure. Maintaining is not gaining.
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Maintaining is a place like it has its own place in weight, weight loss,
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weight, whatever, like maintenance has a place. Okay.
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And so understanding that, right? Like how many calories should I be getting
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in and macros and ounces of water should I be And if I want to maintain weight,
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you know, do you know that?
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Also, how food affects you physically. Okay.
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And this one is so just like, blah, blah, blah, blah. It's different for everyone.
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But like people will like blanket statement things about specific foods.
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Like, oh, I heard that gives you gas.
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Oh, I heard I don't need to eat that because it'll give me a headache.
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Oh, I heard, you know, that causes inflammation, like whatever.
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Okay, people are different across the board. People have different ailments.
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People have different immune responses. People are different, right?
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And so again, this is not reading what the real that came across your feed that
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said top 10 inflammation foods to avoid, right?
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Like that ain't it. You know, it's nice knowledge to have, but you should not
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be hanging your hat on what someone else said would cause you inflammation,
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especially if you don't notice any inflammation from those foods.
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Right or otherwise y'all with every
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ailment with every like cause and effect we would
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be avoiding all foods all foods all foods would have
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a problem you know and so again this requires you to turn in okay say you do
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eat one of those foods that came across your timeline how do you feel you know
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what do you notice about yourself or or are you in tuned enough with yourself
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at the end of the day to say, like, golly,
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I'm having some stomach pain.
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Let me track it back and see what I ate, you know, at lunch or for a snack or
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whatever that could be causing this, okay?
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Actually, I've been having a headache all week long. What have I eaten every
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day this week? Or what have I done?
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It doesn't have to be about food, right? Like, what have I done every day this week? This is so.
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Relevant for me this week. It
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has been so hot outside. And so I have been getting up early and walking.
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And up until it got really hot outside, I was getting up early and kind of having
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some quiet time on the couch for a little while before I walked.
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So during that quiet time, I was drinking a lot of water.
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Well, now I'm like just trying to get out there as soon as I can so that it's
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not, you know, so blazing hot. And so I haven't been getting my water in when I get up.
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So I'm coming inside every day. And I'm like, Oh my gosh, I have such a headache.
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Like, why do I have such a headache? Well, because I woke up dehydrated.
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And then I went outside dehydrated. And then I walked dang near three miles
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and dehydrated myself even more.
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Why do you think you have a headache, Constance?
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You know, so it's little stuff like this. But again, we have to take the time
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to register it. If I had just been like, let me go take some Tylenol, I got a headache.
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I mean, I'd be, you know, weeks on end with a headache thinking,
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you know, I don't know what's going on. Okay, and so it's the same.
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How do things affect you physically? And are you in tune with that?
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So where is your, like, are you having stomach pain, you know,
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often enough that it should be, you know, on your radar?
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Is your energy drastically low often enough that it should be on your radar?
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Are you noticing like you're hungry, hungrier more days than not or on specific days?
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Okay, do you notice what food sits right? Y'all never and never,
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never, never, never till I was almost 40 over here have I had to like pay attention
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to different types of like sauces,
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like so red sauce and champagne and even like barbecue foods kind of make my stomach burn.
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Like I'm like, oh my God, that's like some reflux or something going on in there.
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You know what I mean? And so again, it's just paying attention to it.
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And then what can we do about that? You know, not just believing what someone
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else says to me that I need to avoid, but truly knowing who you are physically.
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Okay. And then, you know, then you can do your Google search or your deep dive
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or whatever to figure out, okay.
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What is it about champagne that might be making my stomach burn, right?
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And then how, like, what other things are made up the same way?
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And how can I, in this case, have alcohol that's not champagne,
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you know, that will be easier on my stomach? Okay, that's just an example.
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Another way to understand your body is to understand how food affects you mentally, okay?
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This is a huge one. So what happens if you do or don't have something like people,
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people will say, like, I am going to cut out sugar, or I am going to cut out,
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you know, Cokes, or whatever it is.
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And then they are raging, or super snacky, or, you know, foggy headed that whole week.
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And it takes forever for them to make the connection.
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Right? It takes forever for them to make the connection. And so it's just about connecting.
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Like if you cut out sugar, yeah, girl, you're going to have some withdrawal
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from that if you are a sugar queen. And so that still doesn't change that you
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want to cut out sugar, right?
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Like just because you have the withdrawal, like you don't want to go back to
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having sugar, right? If that's something you're trying to really do is limit your sugar.
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So what can we do to help with these withdrawals, right? And also knowing,
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like, okay, this is what's happening.
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I'm having a withdrawal because I haven't had sugar in the past two days.
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But I also know if I just push forward, it will get better.
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Okay? And so I did this. This is another, like, personal thing.
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Because I was having stomach issues, like, around the, like,
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February, March, April timeline, I went and I got upper GI and all these things.
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And so my doctor had advised me on some things that I could do.
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And one of the things he advised me on was to cut out caffeine.
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And I thought, oh, my gosh, LOL. You know, like I literally was like,
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you're ridiculous, bro. Like I run a business.
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I have two young kids. Like, like we are so busy around here. Like, no.
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But then the more I thought about it, the more I thought, OK.
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I actually hate the way I feel around. And so I'll drink my coffee or I used
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to drink my coffee usually around like 7.30 or 8.
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And so around like 10.30, 11, like I crash.
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And then if I don't have like a sugar pick me up or back in the day,
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I used to have a diet coke pick me up at lunch.
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Like would feel like I couldn't make it through the rest of the day.
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And then around 2 o'clock, I was done. It was like clockwork, y'all.
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Every time it was time to leave for carpool, I was just like,
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oh, my God, I'm so tired. Like, I don't even think I can get in the car to get
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these kids. You know, it was wild.
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And so the more I thought about it, I thought, you know what?
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I think I can do this. I think I can just try and see.
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What, like, how it's going to happen. And so my sister had actually has given
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up caffeine. She gave it up years ago.
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And so she told me, like, it's even helped her, like, feel more regulated as far as anxiety goes.
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And I'm like, okay, if anybody needs that help, it's me, you know.
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So anyway, I gave up, I gave up caffeine. I tapered down, right,
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which I, which I agree, or I feel like we should do with all things.
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Like, anything that is truly a vice, like, something that we have had,
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y'all, I have had coffee.
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My parents were putting coffee in a sippy cup for me.
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I mean, it was a little splash coffee with a lot of milk and sugar,
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but you know what I'm saying.
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I wanted to be a big girl even back then. So I've been having coffee my entire life.
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And so I tapered down, you know, a little bit less each day for a couple of
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weeks until I just went cold turkey.
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But even still, even though I tapered down and then like I was down to maybe a fourth a cup of coffee.
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Literally, it was nothing before I went cold turkey.
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But even still, when I went cold turkey, holy smokes.
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It was wild, y'all. I felt like I was going through a major withdrawal.
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I had the worst headache. I was so tired. I was so frustrated and angry.
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But I was prepared. I was equipped.
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I had talked to my sister a lot about it. I had done a lot of research.
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I knew this was coming, right? And I knew I could get more water in and I could
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like be easy with myself, be gentle with myself.
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Those few days, I did not pack my calendar with like super pressing or super
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like important things because I knew that I would not do them efficiently or well.
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And so, you know, I purposefully structured it in a way that I could.
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Be in like a few days of not, I mean, not nowhere, but like just easier,
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lighter work to manage this caffeine withdrawal.
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And then you know what? It was fine after that, right? It was fine after that.
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And so, but I know, you know, for the future, like if I had caffeine and again,
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if I started back on caffeine again, and then like tapered down,
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like I would know what to expect, right?
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And so it's the same thing, like
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just knowing what, Diet Coke is a really great example for a lot of us.
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Like Diet Coke, golly, that craving calls us so strongly.
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But for most of us, it's like as soon as we have it, we find ourselves more lethargic.
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We find ourselves like more snacky and it's specifically sweet snacks, you know?
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And so if you're like, gosh, I can't figure out why I'm not,
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I can't stay out of the candy jar around two or three o'clock every day,
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but you're having a Diet Coke with lunch every day.
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I mean, connect the dots, right? And then also another way to just like check
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in with how food affects you mentally is what foods do you turn to in emotion?
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Like when you are having a bad day, an emotional day, a hard day, what food do you find?
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I mean, for most of us, it's either super sweet or super salty, right?
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And again, this is not about shame or judgment around it, right?
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It's just knowing, like knowing, okay, Constance, you've had a bad day today.
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So what I know about you is you're going to go up in that pantry or up in that
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freezer and you're going to get those chocolate-covered blueberries and you're
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going to eat them, you know, like there is no tomorrow.
25:16
Like I know this about you because this is what we do, you know.
25:20
And so then from there, you can make a decision, right? You can say like,
25:23
I'm going to, I'm not going to say no to my blueberries,
25:27
my frozen chocolate-covered blueberries, but I am going to portion them out,
25:31
put them on a napkin, put the bag back in the freezer and like sit down and
25:35
have control over the amount that I eat,
25:40
Or when I get home, I'm going to try to do something else to calm down.
25:46
I'm going to go for a walk. I'm going to do a meditation.
25:49
You know, I'm going to go play with my kids and just try to forget about the
25:52
day or whatever it is for you that you that you need to do.
25:55
If you aren't aware of your reaction out of emotions, if you aren't aware of
26:01
the types of foods or the fact that you even turn to food every time you're
26:06
emotional or stressed or whatever,
26:08
then you aren't going to be equipped to then confidently face that emotion or
26:14
that stress or that food.
26:17
Okay. So it's just about awareness.
26:20
Another way to understand your body is just how your habits affect you,
26:23
right? Like how do your habits affect you physically and how do they affect you mentally?
26:28
So do you notice that if you exercise, you tend to have better energy,
26:32
you tend to feel better, you tend to eat better that day?
26:35
Like, is that something you notice? Like, you tend to have a better mindset that day?
26:40
Or do you notice that if you don't get a lot of sleep, are you more stressed?
26:44
Are you more irritable? You have a shorter fuse, you tend to want to snack more,
26:48
you tend to like overeat portions, you're not very mindful about what you're
26:52
eating, you know, like, this is just noticing things about yourself, okay? And like,
26:58
how to then like give yourself grace in those moments, right?
27:03
Another way to understand your body is how your cycle affects you physically and mentally.
27:07
Y'all, this is hilarious, but we have, I have multiple PFM plus clients and
27:13
I talk to them all pretty much daily.
27:16
And like, sometimes they will be like, Oh, I just sucked it up.
27:22
And I just, I feel like I'm never going to lose this way.
27:25
And these are clients that have lost like 10, 15, 20 pounds.
27:28
Like they are losing, you know what I mean?
27:30
But they'll just be like, oh, I'm never going to lose this weight.
27:32
I'm just so frustrated. And I just feel like I can never, you know,
27:36
get it right and all this.
27:38
And I will hit them back with, are you about to start?
27:41
Are you about to start your period? You know, because I have gotten to know
27:46
them, you know, I have, it's so funny because I will even scroll back sometimes
27:50
and be like, okay, yep. It was about four weeks ago.
27:52
She was doing the same exact thing,
27:54
you know? And so I've gotten to know their cycle. And it is a thing.
28:00
It is a real thing. Your cycle affects you so much. It's really unfair.
28:05
We can all be so mad at Eve.
28:06
You know what I mean? But like it is, it affects you so much physically and mentally.
28:10
Okay. It causes a higher level of exhaustion. It causes more irritability.
28:16
It causes more cravings, it causes more of that just like, ho-hum,
28:20
like, woe is me kind of mindset, you know?
28:23
So if we aren't careful, when we are in that part of our cycle,
28:28
it's usually like the last 10 days, eight to 10 days or whatever.
28:32
When we are there, if we don't know better, like if, like a lot of my ladies
28:36
have IUDs or like they don't even really track their cycle.
28:39
Like if, so if you don't know better during those days or during that week,
28:44
you're just thinking you suck and you're never going to do this and you're going to fail.
28:48
And like you get caught up in your mindset of, you know, not victimhood,
28:55
but just like, you know, feeling, feeling sorry for yourself.
28:58
And it makes it that much harder to climb out of whenever your cycle does pass.
29:02
And you are back in the very, you know, the first, the first part where it's
29:06
like, you know, I've got all this energy, and I'm so, you know,
29:10
awesome, and I can do everything, and blah, blah, blah,
29:12
you know, and so just being aware of that, like, where are you in your cycle,
29:18
or should you be in your cycle if you are,
29:21
if you don't get regular periods, and could you connect some dots here right
29:26
now with that, like, last week you were feeling on your game,
29:29
and this week you feel like life is falling apart, like, can we connect some dots there,
29:33
you know, especially if nothing in your season or your day to day has changed.
29:36
And then in that moment, can you offer yourself some grace? You know,
29:42
in that moment, can you say, you know what?
29:44
I am so tired and now I know why because I'm in my last few days before I'm about to start.
29:49
So instead of forcing myself to go to the gym, I'm going to rest or I'm going
29:53
to go on a slow, easy walk without any distraction, right?
29:56
Or I'm going to get dinner on the table sooner so that I can get in bed earlier.
30:01
You know, whatever it is that you need to do to then like tend to your body,
30:06
to love your body when your cycle is affecting you in the way that it's affecting you, right?
30:12
Or with eating, it's like, okay, you are noticing you're hungry or you're more snacky, whatever.
30:17
So can you just hit your maintenance numbers this week for my clients that know
30:21
their maintenance numbers?
30:22
Like, can you just hit maintenance and say, yeah, like, I really did want to lose weight this week.
30:27
But like, I know that hitting maintenance is serving me better this week.
30:31
Because otherwise, I would try to lose weight each day and then be so snacky
30:37
and then get so down on myself and be so frustrated and then probably just say
30:41
screw it and like binge out.
30:43
You know what I mean? So by allowing yourself to hit maintenance,
30:46
you're being more gentle with yourself and just saying like,
30:49
yeah, we are going to have a few more snacks today and that's okay instead of, you know.
30:56
The shame that can often come after binges when they aren't planned or they
30:59
aren't, you know, thought about.
31:02
Another way to understand your body is just how your mindset is affecting your
31:06
choices and the way that you treat your body, right?
31:10
So understanding that our brain is like the most powerful thing, okay?
31:15
And so if we are constantly thinking, I suck, I suck, I'm not going to lose this week.
31:21
I'm going to be fat forever. I can never seem to get it together.
31:26
You know, I don't know why I'm even trying. I know I'm not going to lose weight.
31:30
You are then going to make the food choices that reflect that.
31:36
You are going to choose the fried food. You are going to choose the donut.
31:41
You are going to choose not to work out today. You are going to choose to just
31:46
sit on the couch and scroll, okay?
31:48
Diving deeper, deeper into that dark black hole, okay?
31:52
So even when we don't truly believe some of the things, We do need to be very
31:59
aware of our mindset and the place we allow our brain to go.
32:05
Thoughts are going to come across.
32:07
They are going to come whether we like it or not. But you choose whether you
32:12
reach out and grab that thought and then play it on repeat.
32:15
Or whether you just let it fly on by and say, okay, by thought,
32:19
I know you think I'm fat, but I'm going to keep on going on this walk.
32:21
You know, I'm going to keep on trying to eat this salad.
32:24
You know, like you make that choice. Okay. And so if we're not in tune with
32:29
our body, we are definitely not in tune with our mind.
32:33
You know, and so just how is your mindset affecting your food choices and the
32:37
way that you treat your body every day?
32:39
Okay. And then my last one that I have here for understanding your body is just
32:43
being aware of other things that might be going on in your body that could have
32:47
you stalling out right now.
32:49
Lots of little things that like I'm always, we're always in conversation with our ladies about.
32:53
Okay. So like as small as, you know, you had a stomach bug last week and this week, isn't it funny?
33:01
We always get a stomach bug and we're like, oh yeah, I lost three pounds on that stomach bug.
33:05
And then now this week I plan to, you know, lose more.
33:07
This is my momentum. You know, when in reality, you usually stall the week after
33:12
a stomach bug because your body is not worrying about losing weight.
33:15
It already lost more weight than it wanted to last week.
33:18
Your body is now worried about recovering.
33:21
OK, and so no matter how healthy or, you know, in your calorie deficit you eat,
33:26
your body has other plans for you that week.
33:29
OK, and so it's the same if you have like a sinus infection or you're sick with
33:33
something that is an infection.
33:36
Okay your body is more focused on healing that than
33:39
it is weight loss okay if you have an
33:42
illness that you were that requires you to be on medication for
33:45
your body is more worried about navigating the medication and and and again
33:52
healing you than it is about weight loss so all the time my ladies are like
33:57
i'm on a steroid this week or on an antibiotic this week i'm like well let's
34:00
hit maintenance and let's just live life, okay?
34:03
Because I don't want you out here doing more harm than good, okay?
34:08
So for me, like when we just got back from Tulum a few weeks ago and.
34:12
My, like, I just, I don't know what it, we were in the water a lot.
34:17
And, you know, I was in a swimsuit a lot. And we were eating things that I don't usually eat.
34:21
And so, and then we came home for a few days, then we turned around and went
34:24
to the beach and did the same thing, like in the water a lot,
34:27
drinking more alcohol than I would usually drink, eating things that I don't
34:31
usually eat, just like all the gamut, you know, sleep was off everything. Okay.
34:35
And so I have noticed that my gut just feels imbalanced.
34:39
Like I just, I do not feel quote normal, you know, like all of it across the board.
34:46
And so my body is like trying to get back to that homeostasis,
34:52
which we've talked about, you know, here recently, my body is trying to get back to homeostasis.
34:57
And when it is trying to do that, it is not trying to lose weight.
35:01
And so the best thing that I can do is serve my body in that area,
35:05
like give it the rest it needs, give it the water it needs, give it the nutritious
35:09
food it needs, give it the probiotics that it needs, right?
35:12
And so yeah, that sucks because this week I want to lose weight or whatever.
35:16
But like, sometimes we are we are pushing through mud.
35:20
And really, it could be as easy as pushing through water if we were to just
35:26
allow our body to heal first, you know.
35:29
So that is just some things I have about understanding your body.
35:33
The third focus that I really want to talk about for just getting confident
35:36
in your eating and your weight loss across the board is to stay accountable to this understanding.
35:43
Okay? Staying accountable to
35:45
it. So I just, again, I just word vomited on y'all a ton of things, right?
35:50
That could be, should be, would be, whatever. Okay?
35:54
But what things are you plucking out about yourself that then you will need
35:59
to stay accountable to past a day?
36:03
Past a week. Okay. It's not a quick thing. It's not a one-time thing.
36:07
It's not like I listened to Constance's podcast and I figured out that I need
36:11
to focus in on how things affect me physically and mentally.
36:14
My habits affect me physically and mentally. And, and, you know,
36:17
that's just what I've been focusing on for the past five years.
36:19
Now, ma'am, you go, you go climb that mountain and then there's going to be
36:23
a bigger one or maybe not a bigger one, but another one.
36:25
You know what I mean? So it evolves as you continue on through this process,
36:30
right? But that's the point, right?
36:32
Like that's the point. People say they want to live a healthy lifestyle, right?
36:37
But to do that, it's got to be a part of your what?
36:41
Lifestyle. You have to be in tuned with your body for life.
36:46
Okay. So things like staying in tune with how your body reacts to certain foods
36:50
or food combinations and then adjusting them.
36:53
Right. Like we can't just say, well, Constance told me to pay attention.
36:58
And so now I know that Diet Cokes make me crave sugar in the afternoon.
37:02
So when I have a Diet Coke with lunch, you know, I noticed that I eat more sugar
37:06
in the afternoons. But like, I'm just going to keep on, you know,
37:09
having my Diet Cokes and like keep on craving the sugar and like keep on wondering
37:14
why I can't lose weight and why I'm always eating the house down in the afternoon.
37:17
Right? Like that is not you staying accountable. That is just you having knowledge.
37:23
Okay? That is not you doing anything about it.
37:25
Another thing, like noticing like, oh, when I don't eat breakfast,
37:29
I'm extra hungry later in the evening.
37:33
You know or if I eat oatmeal made
37:36
with water I am starving within
37:40
five minutes but I'm just going to keep eating oatmeal made
37:43
with water and just keep being starving and then you know there's always donuts
37:47
in the break room and there's always little you know brownies and snacks in
37:50
the break room so I just I'm always going to eat that oatmeal with water because
37:54
I know oatmeal is healthy and so but then every single freaking day I'm just
37:57
going to go grab that donut and a brownie and you know, come back for a cookie later on.
38:02
Like that, you are not staying, you are not doing anything. You have no accountability.
38:07
You just have knowledge that maybe the oatmeal with water don't keep you full.
38:12
So sis, do it differently. Pick a different breakfast.
38:16
Try having oatmeal with milk. Try putting some nuts on top or try doing something
38:20
totally different, right?
38:22
And see if maybe the donuts and the brownie and the cookie don't call your name
38:27
as hard, or at least maybe you don't eat as freaking many of them in the day.
38:32
Okay, and so another is staying aware of your mindset and physical energy around
38:37
your cycle time, okay, or times of stress.
38:41
So like we have just talked about the last, you know, what, eight to 10 days
38:45
or whatever of your cycle can make you feel different.
38:49
And so what are you going to do about that? Are you just going to hate yourself during those few days?
38:54
Or are you going to try to make some changes? One of the best things I ever
38:58
like read, it was years ago, was cycle syncing in your business.
39:03
Okay, and so I mean, I know a lot of guys don't don't have a business,
39:06
but it doesn't matter because you can cycle sync a lot of things in your life.
39:12
You know, like if you have big projects at work, or you know,
39:16
your kids have a lot of things that need to be checked off of a list that you need to get done,
39:20
like trying your best to coordinate that with where you are in your cycle can be game changing.
39:29
And so for me, one of the things that I did this year, I really tried to.
39:34
Okay, weight law, our challenge enrollment literally sucks the life out of me.
39:38
Like launching is so exhausting.
39:40
There's so much that goes into it. There's so much communication with people.
39:44
There are so many emails to write and posts to schedule and it's a lot. Okay.
39:49
And so I need my best energy during that, right?
39:53
I need my best energy. And so this year, I tried to plan our launches when I
39:59
was in the state of best energy during my cycle so that instead of feeling like
40:06
I was drowning in our launches, I felt energetic.
40:10
I felt excited. I felt motivated.
40:12
I felt like present with these people, you know?
40:15
So that's just a prime example. I know some things in life we can't be sinking
40:18
around our cycle, but there are some things we really could.
40:21
But again, we have to stay in tune. We have to stay aware and we have to like,
40:26
okay, here's the understanding of it. Now, what are we going to do about it?
40:30
Okay, and then y'all, this is another one. I just feel like I got to say it
40:34
because I've been saying it individually to people nonstop.
40:37
Okay, we notice, we notice and we say it out loud.
40:40
So many of y'all will tell me like, I just haven't been going to bed early.
40:44
I've been like, I'm not been getting enough sleep, you know,
40:48
and then I just, I don't know what's wrong with me.
40:50
I just can't seem to get to the gym and I just don't really want to eat my healthy
40:55
foods that I usually eat.
40:57
And I'm like, hello, right? Like it's because you aren't getting enough sleep.
41:03
So a lot of times y'all wanna double down on the exercise. You know what?
41:07
I'm just gonna make myself go to the gym today.
41:09
I'm just gonna force feed this, you know, grilled chicken and veggies today
41:14
because I've got to get it back together.
41:16
Meanwhile, you still stay scrolling till 11 p.m., okay? Watching some show on
41:22
Netflix up past midnight.
41:25
When in reality, if you just went to bed earlier,
41:28
the eating and the exercise could come so
41:31
much easier so much easier
41:35
okay because I've done episodes here
41:38
my gosh go to the circadian rhythm podcast from you
41:40
know gosh it was from last year probably at this point but like sleep affects
41:44
everything and lack of sleep affects the way you crave food and the way you
41:50
have no energy hello you know so so instead of just saying like yeah I'm not
41:55
really sleeping and also I'm just going to make myself go to the gym today and blah, blah, blah.
41:59
How about you just say, you know what, I'm just going to make the number one priority sleep.
42:04
Everything else goes by the wayside right now until I get my sleep habits back in check.
42:09
Okay. And then another way to stay accountable is to recognize what habits you
42:14
keep committing to and then not following through on. Okay. This is when I see a lot.
42:20
Like we see people saying, you know, Okay.
42:24
Here's a good one. Okay. Like, like what we do water week, we've got another
42:27
one coming up soon, but water for weight loss week, anybody can join. It's free. It's so fun.
42:31
Everybody gets their recommended ounces of water. Okay.
42:35
So for a lot of us, that's like anywhere from 60 to a hundred to a hundred,
42:40
I mean, a hundred and you know, 30, whatever, like ounces.
42:44
And so we see that number and we're like, okay, now I know how many ounces of
42:49
water I need to be getting, right? Like I've got the evidence.
42:52
So that's what I'm going to do. I'm going to hit that water number.
42:55
I'm going to hit 100 ounces of water a day.
42:57
But what we don't take into consideration is how many ounces of water we've
43:01
actually been getting every day prior.
43:03
Okay. And so you say, I'm going to hit 100 ounces today. And then it feels like, oh my God, I'm drowning.
43:08
And I've only had 45 ounces of water today because it's such a deep gap between
43:13
where you started and where you're trying to go.
43:16
Okay, and so then you find yourself committing to that 100 ounces every single
43:20
day, day in and day out, and every single day, you're not hitting it.
43:25
You're not reaching the 100 ounces. So what does that do? That tells you you're a failure.
43:29
Like it reinforces that shame in you.
43:32
Like, oh heck, I can't even hit my recommended ounces of water today.
43:36
How am I going to even lose weight, right?
43:38
And so instead of that yucky cycle, right, we recognize, okay,
43:43
I keep saying I'm gonna hit this 100 ounces.
43:45
And I keep not hitting this 100 ounces. Okay, so what can I what is a realistic number?
43:51
And we do I do this all the time with my PFM plus people. And it's wild how
43:54
like just that little shift can be a game changer for them.
43:57
Because they say, you know what, I can't hit 100. Like I've tried and I've tried.
44:01
Let's start with 50. Like I think I can hit 50. You know, and so then what happens
44:06
they hit 50 and they hit it day in and day out.
44:09
So they are reaching the goal. and when you reach the goal, you get this like
44:14
boost of confidence, right?
44:16
No one is gonna be confident in their weight loss or their eating habits if
44:20
you're constantly setting a goal that you don't reach.
44:23
Like that is truly impossible to gain confidence from failure.
44:27
And so just adjusting the habits that you keep committing to and not following
44:33
through on, even though it doesn't sound as grandiose and amazing as you want it to,
44:38
it'll feel grandiose and amazing because you're actually reaching it.
44:43
Okay, so that's a way to stay accountable to now what you know about yourself
44:47
because you've looked in and seen yourself setting this 100-ounce goal for a
44:52
month straight and not reaching it. You know what I mean?
44:55
So this has been a long one, a lot of words. My throat is like on fire over here.
45:00
But I did just, you know, want to end with this, this like reminder that knowledge
45:06
does not equal change, y'all.
45:09
We're in a world full of knowledge and it can be easy to trick ourselves into
45:14
thinking that because we have the knowledge, we're actually working on the change.
45:19
But but sometimes too much of that
45:21
knowledge can actually go against you you
45:25
making the change right because your head is just so full of of
45:28
everything and so just because you're thinking about how many ounces of water
45:33
a person might need or just because you're thinking about what a healthy food
45:37
looks like or just because you're you read a reel that said this food is good
45:40
for inflammation or this is good for weight loss or this is the exercise that
45:44
I did to lose 50 pounds or, you know, X, Y, Z, right?
45:47
Just because you have all that in your brain doesn't mean you've done a dang
45:50
thing about your weight loss, not a dang thing, okay?
45:55
And so you need to make your priority be that whatever knowledge you have,
46:00
you need to cling to like a few and let the rest go, okay? They're not bad.
46:06
There's nothing wrong with all that knowledge, but like you can't do all of it at once.
46:10
So you just go tuck that one away, put it all in a folder somewhere and you
46:14
can come back to it, right?
46:15
And then use the select few to help you make a realistic change by looking inward
46:23
every single day, knowing what you know, and then like making action from that,
46:30
making the actual action from that.
46:34
And so this is why we say weight loss is individualized, right?
46:37
Nobody's going to have the exact same answers here. So you can't use that blanket
46:41
approach that we see all over the Internet. And this is why,
46:44
because there's a bazillion answers out there in the world.
46:49
And we have to actually pluck out the ones that we need most in this moment
46:54
to then make the change and become confident in the journey that we're walking out.
47:02
So I hope this one was helpful for y'all. And as always, y'all remember to say
47:07
grace. Thank you for listening to today's episode of Say Grace Podcast.
47:13
Music.