Latest / The Breakfast Club / Dating/Relationship Confessions ( Ari Lennox on toxic love and Michelle Obama gets real about marriage)

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Dating/Relationship Confessions ( Ari Lennox on toxic love and Michelle Obama gets real about marriage) · The Breakfast Club

• 0:02
  Speaker 1: I'm a homegrow that knows a little bit about everything
• 0:04
  Speaker 1: and everybody.
• 0:06
  Speaker 2: You know, if you don't lie about that, right Lauren, Hey, y'all,
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  Speaker 2: what's up.
• 0:10
  Speaker 1: It's Laura l Rosa and this is another episode of
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  Speaker 1: the Latest with Laura Rosa. This is your daily dig
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  Speaker 1: on all things pop culture, entertainment, news, and all of
• 0:21
  Speaker 1: the conversations that shake the room. Now checking in behind
• 0:27
  Speaker 1: the scenes of the Grind. We are literally on a countdown,
• 0:30
  Speaker 1: so we hit the road. I've been talking to you
• 0:33
  Speaker 1: guys about this every single episode, but really excited for
• 0:37
  Speaker 1: a conversation that I'll be joining and now I can
• 0:39
  Speaker 1: give you guys a little bit more details. So if
• 0:42
  Speaker 1: you will be asked ut by Southwest this weekend coming
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  Speaker 1: which is the weekend of March fifteenth, I will be
• 0:50
  Speaker 1: on a panel with a health professional and artist music
• 0:56
  Speaker 1: artist Sierra on Saturday, March for teenth, and we'll be
• 1:01
  Speaker 1: having a conversation about HIV prevention and how entertainment and
• 1:06
  Speaker 1: culture helps us to start having a conversations that we
• 1:09
  Speaker 1: don't want to have to make sure prevention is a
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  Speaker 1: thing that's actually happening. And I'm really excited for that
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  Speaker 1: conversation y'all know.
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  Speaker 2: I love to.
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  Speaker 1: Talk, love to get into the things, but I love
• 1:20
  Speaker 1: when real conversations intertwined with culture pop culture. I think
• 1:24
  Speaker 1: that we underestimate the impact that we have, especially in
• 1:30
  Speaker 1: areas like media, hip hop, R and B. I really
• 1:34
  Speaker 1: think we underestimate how much we make things cool and
• 1:37
  Speaker 1: how much we make things the thing to do. So
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  Speaker 1: excited to be on this panel and be having this conversation,
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  Speaker 1: and that's what my behind the scenes of the grind
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  Speaker 1: has been like. I've been kind of like just resting
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  Speaker 1: and getting through work and resting as much as I
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  Speaker 1: can because this weekend, baby, we are outside. But speaking
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  Speaker 1: of conversations and how culture and impact and real conversations
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  Speaker 1: come together, let's get into a few real conversations that
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  Speaker 1: are happening right now that we just cannot ignore. So
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  Speaker 1: our girl ri Lennox, she was over in La on
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  Speaker 1: effective immediately with my bro DJ Head and my sister
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  Speaker 1: Gina Views and they were having a conversation about music
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  Speaker 1: and where she is in life today in her new
• 2:22
  Speaker 1: project Vacancy Now the Projects Fire. We interviewed her on
• 2:27
  Speaker 1: the Breakfast Club. Go and check that out and full
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  Speaker 1: on Netflix if you have not already. But the project
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  Speaker 1: is all about just like back and forth struggle of
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  Speaker 1: I found someone, this person's making.
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  Speaker 2: Me feel good, I'm not vacant anymore, my.
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  Speaker 1: Space is occupied, and then boom, this person is toxic.
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  Speaker 2: It makes no sense. This person is leaving me.
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  Speaker 1: Empty, and I'm walking away, and now I'm vacant again.
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  Speaker 1: And now I'm here and I'm looking and I'm trying
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  Speaker 1: to figure it out and I'm inviting new people into
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  Speaker 1: my space. It's that tug of war that dating actually is,
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  Speaker 1: where it's like, you figure out what your space is
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  Speaker 1: that you even want to occupied, You figure out how
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  Speaker 1: you want to do it. You figure out who you
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  Speaker 1: want to do it right, like who you want to
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  Speaker 1: occupy your space. But it's so up and down about
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  Speaker 1: what that who looks like. I think most people don't
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  Speaker 1: like having these conversations when it comes to the women's
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  Speaker 1: side of things and women being actually able to get
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  Speaker 1: out there and date. We talked about Loyd Harvey and
• 3:25
  Speaker 1: Demseon Adris on this podcast, and you know a big
• 3:29
  Speaker 1: splash that they made in the news recently with their
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  Speaker 1: dating life. If you didn't listen to that episode, go
• 3:34
  Speaker 1: back and take a listen And the reason why I
• 3:35
  Speaker 1: bring up Lori Harvey in this is because people love
• 3:39
  Speaker 1: to give Lourie Harvey such a hard time for dating,
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  Speaker 1: for going out dating people figuring out what she likes
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  Speaker 1: so she doesn't like.
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  Speaker 2: And I mean it's a lot more public.
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  Speaker 1: Because she is the daughter of Steve Harvey and she's
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  Speaker 1: become a figure in a fixture and culture.
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  Speaker 2: Of her own.
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  Speaker 1: And she's also dating men who are high profile and
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  Speaker 1: very well known as well too. But every time I
• 4:01
  Speaker 1: hear someone complain about her and a dating situation or
• 4:04
  Speaker 1: the fact that she may have moved on or may
• 4:07
  Speaker 1: have broken up with someone, I'm like, what it like?
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  Speaker 2: She's human.
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  Speaker 1: That is how you figure out what not being vacant
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  Speaker 1: in your space looks like. You got to figure out
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  Speaker 1: who you want to check in and who you need.
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  Speaker 2: To check out.
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  Speaker 1: So Ri Lennox is on that journey right now. And
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  Speaker 1: the album it literally is the R and B Neo
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  Speaker 1: Soul soundtrack to that right So she's you know, over
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  Speaker 1: on effective immediately with DJ Head and Gena Views and
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  Speaker 1: it get into a conversation about just dating, and you know,
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  Speaker 1: from having a conversation myself with the Ri Lennox, I
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  Speaker 1: feel like she's in a season of accountability that I
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  Speaker 1: haven't seen from her. And I've been a fan of
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  Speaker 1: her for a very long time, and I'm not mad
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  Speaker 1: at it whatsoever, and i don't know why it's making
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  Speaker 1: people so upset. But here's what she had to say
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  Speaker 1: about the fact that she chooses toxic men over nice
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  Speaker 1: men who would treat her nice, and that's why she
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  Speaker 1: thinks she he's a married Let's say a.
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  Speaker 3: Listen, I think I have a thing for toxic energy,
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  Speaker 3: so I think there's still some more healing that I
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  Speaker 3: need to do. Because when I look back on all
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  Speaker 3: of these energies, it's a shame I gave them so
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  Speaker 3: much time and there were sweet energies that I didn't
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  Speaker 3: And so now I see those sweet energies getting married
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  Speaker 3: and starting families, I'm just like, dang, that probably could
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  Speaker 3: have been me if I recognize the security in those
• 5:26
  Speaker 3: individuals at the time, And like now I'm like, yeah,
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  Speaker 3: I'm definitely feeling that now I'm aware that there's something
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  Speaker 3: going on, there's something wrong.
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  Speaker 2: What do you think it is that attracts you to
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  Speaker 2: like toxic energy?
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  Speaker 3: I think they just seem really exciting at first. The
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  Speaker 3: chemistry is incredible, and they don't even always be fine.
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  Speaker 3: It's not even that like they're sexy or something. Well,
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  Speaker 3: they're sexy, but they don't be the finest things I've
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  Speaker 3: ever seen. It's just an energy. It's sometimes it's convenience
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  Speaker 3: what we talk about. A lot of the the sweeter
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  Speaker 3: energies that I felt like weren't for me. I felt
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  Speaker 3: I could see myself falling asleep a little bit on
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  Speaker 3: the phone. So I don't know if that's like if
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  Speaker 3: boring is good or not, Like I'm trying to figure
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  Speaker 3: out what that means.
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  Speaker 2: Like it's the thrill, Yeah, it's the thrill.
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  Speaker 3: Yeah.
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  Speaker 1: Can I just say that I don't know any woman
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  Speaker 1: who has not been through this phase of her life,
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  Speaker 1: Like I don't maybe some more drastic than others, right,
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  Speaker 1: like maybe some you know, have allowed more than others,
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  Speaker 1: have stayed in situations longer than others.
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  Speaker 2: You know, or or in this mood in this phase
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  Speaker 2: a little bit older than others.
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  Speaker 1: Because I don't mean right now, myself, the relationship I'm in,
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  Speaker 1: it couldn't have been that, Like, it couldn't have been
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  Speaker 1: Oh my god, you had a nice guy.
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  Speaker 2: I don't want to be with you because it's boring.
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  Speaker 1: No, Like I am at a point where, yes I do,
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  Speaker 1: I definitely need someone that is like gonna get me
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  Speaker 1: in check and gonna get me together.
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  Speaker 2: Okay, because I can get I can take it there.
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  Speaker 1: But I'm also just valuing and loving on myself so
• 7:04
  Speaker 1: much differently than I was when I thought that that
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  Speaker 1: type of thing was like it for me and I
• 7:08
  Speaker 1: thought that was cute. My like how I am about
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  Speaker 1: myself today wouldn't even allow me to entertain the type
• 7:18
  Speaker 1: of energy that or Lenox is talking about. But I
• 7:22
  Speaker 1: don't knock her for being there because I was there
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  Speaker 1: and in me being there, and once.
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  Speaker 2: I started to come up out of it.
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  Speaker 1: And it's not that, And it's not that the relationship
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  Speaker 1: I'm in right now or the marriage I will be
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  Speaker 1: in with you know, my partner now, it's all the
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  Speaker 1: way perfect whatsoever. But the fact that we as women,
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  Speaker 1: and so many women I know have been through this
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  Speaker 1: felt like if things were good, if we were being
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  Speaker 1: loved on the right way, there's something wrong.
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  Speaker 2: And I still had my.
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  Speaker 1: Moments, don't get me wrong, Like I still my moments
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  Speaker 1: where I'm ranting.
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  Speaker 2: Like you really love me, like you tell me, like.
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  Speaker 1: And it's and it's so crazy, nothing's wrong, Like like
• 8:08
  Speaker 1: it's like walking outside on a ninety degree day with
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  Speaker 1: their sun and no rain and you're dressed for the
• 8:13
  Speaker 1: rain because it's just like, well, I know it rains
• 8:15
  Speaker 1: in the world, so I'm just dressed like this, Like
• 8:17
  Speaker 1: that's literally what that's like. And I don't know why
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  Speaker 1: our mind and our psyches do that to us as women.
• 8:23
  Speaker 1: And I think, you know, if I'm being honest with you,
• 8:27
  Speaker 1: coming out of the like that mental space and that
• 8:31
  Speaker 1: that aura that are Lennox is talking about, you get
• 8:35
  Speaker 1: so traumatized by manipulation and it becomes such a consistent
• 8:43
  Speaker 1: pattern of like this is too good to be true.
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  Speaker 1: And I think it's not even about like manipulation from
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  Speaker 1: men in relationships, because you know, some people listening to
• 8:51
  Speaker 1: this will be like never been there, never been that,
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  Speaker 1: never experienced that.
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  Speaker 2: Sometimes that comes from life.
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  Speaker 1: Like I don't know about y'all, but I know even
• 9:00
  Speaker 1: in life, like there are times where I'm like, God,
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  Speaker 1: you're doing your thing a little.
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  Speaker 2: Bit too much, like what's about to happen? What's going on?
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  Speaker 1: And the fact that we even question that is if
• 9:10
  Speaker 1: we're not supposed to have good things in life when
• 9:13
  Speaker 1: you work for them, or you know, when you faith
• 9:16
  Speaker 1: it through your journey the way that you were supposed to,
• 9:19
  Speaker 1: or just you know, like you showed for God, you're
• 9:21
  Speaker 1: gonna show off for you is insane. If you study
• 9:25
  Speaker 1: for your test and you do well in your test,
• 9:27
  Speaker 1: you wouldn't go and actually teacher like, why do I
• 9:28
  Speaker 1: gotta abelus you crazy?
• 9:30
  Speaker 2: But we do it anyway.
• 9:32
  Speaker 1: And I think watching people be upset at or Linux
• 9:35
  Speaker 1: for making these comments, I'm like, oh, I wish the
• 9:38
  Speaker 1: world was a lot more honest about the things that
• 9:40
  Speaker 1: we actually go through as human beings. Because what I
• 9:43
  Speaker 1: love about our Linux in this conversation is and in
• 9:47
  Speaker 1: any conversation that I'm seeing her in throughout this, like
• 9:50
  Speaker 1: you know that this accountability phase that she's in, it's
• 9:54
  Speaker 1: just very honest. And it's not even about trying to
• 9:57
  Speaker 1: be relatable. It's really just honest. And I think when
• 10:02
  Speaker 1: you get to the point where like you could be
• 10:04
  Speaker 1: honest with yourself to like literally so honest with yourself
• 10:07
  Speaker 1: where even if you're still doing the things that you're
• 10:10
  Speaker 1: having to sit yourself down and be like are you
• 10:12
  Speaker 1: crazy about? That's a different level of like transition and
• 10:17
  Speaker 1: growth that's about to happen in your life. Now, let's
• 10:21
  Speaker 1: get to Michelle Obama and her brother Craig Robinson and
• 10:25
  Speaker 1: the conversation they had with Sterling K. Brown and his wife,
• 10:28
  Speaker 1: Ryan Michelle Bath. Now, both Sterling K. Brown and Ryan
• 10:31
  Speaker 1: Michelle Bath are actors. They act and the conversation was
• 10:36
  Speaker 1: very wide range. It was about an Iron Owe conversation
• 10:39
  Speaker 1: on the In My Own Opinion podcast.
• 10:41
  Speaker 2: And what I love about.
• 10:42
  Speaker 1: Michelle Obama's conversation is exactly what I'm telling you, guys,
• 10:45
  Speaker 1: I took from Art Lennox, like and people they I
• 10:49
  Speaker 1: hate to put these words together, drag and Michelle Obama
• 10:52
  Speaker 1: because I feel like she's our forever first Lady.
• 10:53
  Speaker 2: Don't ever play with her.
• 10:55
  Speaker 1: But what people love to drag Michelle Obama about in
• 10:59
  Speaker 1: this phase of her life where she's honest and talking
• 11:03
  Speaker 1: us through things as a human, not just as the
• 11:06
  Speaker 1: first Lady, but as a human who has had children,
• 11:08
  Speaker 1: who has been married thirty plus years, who has you know,
• 11:11
  Speaker 1: loved the same man for thirty plus years.
• 11:13
  Speaker 2: She tells the truth.
• 11:16
  Speaker 1: So they're having the conversation about Michelle Obama. You know,
• 11:21
  Speaker 1: she's she's been very vocal about the fact that there
• 11:23
  Speaker 1: were ten some years that were not good with her
• 11:27
  Speaker 1: and Barack Obama, but comparing that to all the other years,
• 11:32
  Speaker 1: it was worth the fight. And in having that conversation,
• 11:36
  Speaker 1: Sterling K. Brown acts Michelle Obama basically did she did
• 11:40
  Speaker 1: they only make it through because of the kids, which
• 11:44
  Speaker 1: is a common thing as well too with married couples,
• 11:46
  Speaker 1: especially once you've already put the time in and you.
• 11:49
  Speaker 2: Know all the things. And I thought that this was
• 11:51
  Speaker 2: a very like he was very bold for acting this question.
• 11:56
  Speaker 1: But when I heard him ask it, I'm like, I've
• 11:59
  Speaker 1: never thought about that word her and Barack Obama because
• 12:01
  Speaker 1: it seems like, I don't know, like they're former president,
• 12:04
  Speaker 1: former first lady, they have the perfect family, like there
• 12:07
  Speaker 1: was no other option but for them to figure it out.
• 12:09
  Speaker 1: But that's not true. They're humans. Let's take a listen
• 12:11
  Speaker 1: to how much Obama.
• 12:13
  Speaker 2: Answered that.
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  Speaker 4: If kids were not a part of the equation in
• 12:18
  Speaker 4: terms of, like, do you think that some of the
• 12:20
  Speaker 4: tough times may have led to a separation that didn't
• 12:23
  Speaker 4: Sometimes without kids, some of the tough times wouldn't happen, right,
• 12:28
  Speaker 4: And this is why I say, Look, it's great when
• 12:32
  Speaker 4: it's just YouTube, right, you know, and because there really
• 12:36
  Speaker 4: isn't challenges with division of labor, because everybody can be
• 12:41
  Speaker 4: their own individual people.
• 12:43
  Speaker 2: You go off through your movie.
• 12:44
  Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, we have our separate lives, and then it's
• 12:47
  Speaker 4: romantic we get back together. The thing that makes that
• 12:51
  Speaker 4: harder is when those beautiful, wonderful, lovely kids that we
• 12:55
  Speaker 4: all want in love they show They show up with
• 12:58
  Speaker 4: their own agendas, you know, with their own needs. And
• 13:02
  Speaker 4: now it's the first major joint project that you have
• 13:07
  Speaker 4: to do together, and that's when that's when the heart starts,
• 13:12
  Speaker 4: you know. So I think a lot of our heart
• 13:14
  Speaker 4: was because of the kids.
• 13:16
  Speaker 2: Do we love deeply, But I.
• 13:18
  Speaker 4: Think without it, without them, you know, a lot of
• 13:22
  Speaker 4: the hard things don't come up all right because you could.
• 13:26
  Speaker 4: You can go to the gym all you want, when
• 13:29
  Speaker 4: there are no diapers to be changed, you know, you
• 13:31
  Speaker 4: can do whatever you want. Who's who's driving?
• 13:36
  Speaker 3: Do you know?
• 13:39
  Speaker 4: Do you know how to make a dental appointment? Do
• 13:41
  Speaker 4: you know where they go to the doctor? Do you
• 13:43
  Speaker 4: know their doctor's name? Look, the the level of muscle
• 13:49
  Speaker 4: that Barack and I have in our marriage is earned.
• 13:52
  Speaker 4: It's earned over time, and it's only gotten better, and
• 13:55
  Speaker 4: I think that's the point. It gets better, and then
• 13:59
  Speaker 4: you if you quit, you soon you rob yourself of
• 14:01
  Speaker 4: the success of the better the work that goes in.
• 14:05
  Speaker 1: Love it, love it, And that's the duality of like
• 14:10
  Speaker 1: growth and womanhood and love. It's like because even Michelle Ryan,
• 14:16
  Speaker 1: Michelle Bath and Sla Kate Brown, they have a podcast
• 14:19
  Speaker 1: called We Don't Always Get Along and they're literally on
• 14:23
  Speaker 1: Michelle Obama's podcast with her and her brother Craig and
• 14:26
  Speaker 1: are talking about the fact that like, it doesn't always
• 14:30
  Speaker 1: feel good the conversations, the relationship a lot of things
• 14:33
  Speaker 1: it doesn't, but they figure it out. And they even
• 14:37
  Speaker 1: talk about at one point where like one person might
• 14:40
  Speaker 1: check out and be like, I ain't doing this, No,
• 14:44
  Speaker 1: not happening. I'm good, but there's still one person there
• 14:47
  Speaker 1: fighting for the relationship. So basically what I'm trying to
• 14:51
  Speaker 1: say here is leave my guard ri Lennox alone. Everybody
• 14:55
  Speaker 1: has their phases in their stages that they must go through,
• 14:58
  Speaker 1: and a lot of us go through the same ones,
• 14:59
  Speaker 1: just with different people at different times of our lives.
• 15:02
  Speaker 2: But I think once you get to this like stage
• 15:04
  Speaker 2: of growth, we tend to forget.
• 15:09
  Speaker 1: And I think that's what makes Arlenox so amazing as
• 15:12
  Speaker 1: an artist, is like she's just very honest about what
• 15:15
  Speaker 1: she's dealing with, and it makes you relate to the
• 15:18
  Speaker 1: music even more. Like when I listened to the project,
• 15:21
  Speaker 1: I knew I'm like, oh, baby, girl is dating and
• 15:25
  Speaker 1: she is trying to figure it out. And the only
• 15:27
  Speaker 1: reason why I knew that is because before getting into
• 15:30
  Speaker 1: a relationship, I was dating, and I know what it's
• 15:33
  Speaker 1: like to feel like, Okay, I have this space, I
• 15:37
  Speaker 1: have my boundaries that I've set up, and I'm allowing
• 15:39
  Speaker 1: you to come into it. And I understand the reference
• 15:41
  Speaker 1: of like comparing that to a hotel and checking in
• 15:43
  Speaker 1: and checking out and you know, fixing up the hotel
• 15:47
  Speaker 1: and fixing up the rooms and fixing up what it
• 15:49
  Speaker 1: looks like when people walk into your life, especially after
• 15:51
  Speaker 1: other people walk out across the board, where everybody's just
• 15:54
  Speaker 1: trying to figure it out, y'all, period, that's it.
• 15:58
  Speaker 2: That's all.
• 15:59
  Speaker 1: Everybody is just trying to figure it out. And I
• 16:02
  Speaker 1: appreciate the good conversations that have it in the midst
• 16:04
  Speaker 1: of it. Let me know how y'all are feeling, though.
• 16:07
  Speaker 1: Number One, are you where r Lenox is at. How
• 16:10
  Speaker 1: do you feel about what she said? I want to
• 16:11
  Speaker 1: hear from you, guys. I'm Laura Laoza everywhere l O
• 16:14
  Speaker 1: R E N l O R O s A. Let's
• 16:18
  Speaker 1: really talk about it. There is also a talk back
• 16:21
  Speaker 1: feature on the iHeart app. If you download the iHeart app,
• 16:24
  Speaker 1: you'll find the talk back feature there.
• 16:26
  Speaker 2: You can literally go.
• 16:27
  Speaker 1: There, click the talk back feature and talk back to me,
• 16:30
  Speaker 1: my lowriders. I want you all to get outside in
• 16:32
  Speaker 1: the streets, in the tweets.
• 16:33
  Speaker 2: I want to hear it. R Lenox. Is she crazy?
• 16:38
  Speaker 2: Do you feel her? Why are people so upset?
• 16:42
  Speaker 1: And on the other end of things, on the married
• 16:44
  Speaker 1: end of things, do you think that Barack Obama and
• 16:48
  Speaker 1: Michelle Obama but hearing everything that Michelle Obama has said
• 16:51
  Speaker 1: very openly about the issue that they went through, if
• 16:53
  Speaker 1: there were no babies involved, would we have had the
• 16:56
  Speaker 1: first family that we had in that White House during
• 16:59
  Speaker 1: the time. I'm Lona Rosa. This has been another episode
• 17:02
  Speaker 1: of the Latest with Lorna Rosa. Tell you guys, every
• 17:05
  Speaker 1: single episode. Look, y'all could be anywhere with any old
• 17:08
  Speaker 1: body talking about all of the things, But you guys,
• 17:11
  Speaker 1: choose to be right here with me every single day,
• 17:14
  Speaker 1: my Lowriders.
• 17:15
  Speaker 2: I appreciate you guys. I'll catch you at my next episode.