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How can I balance caring with my own needs? · Wellbeing Solutions - Ask A Counsellor

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  SPEAKER_00: How can I balance caring with my own needs?
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  SPEAKER_00: When somebody depends on you for care, your own needs can gradually move further and further down the list.
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  SPEAKER_00: You might tell yourself you'll rest when things settle down, see friends when you have more time, or deal with your own health and well-being once the other person is doing better.
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  SPEAKER_00: The difficulty is that caring responsibilities don't always have a clear endpoint.
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  SPEAKER_00: Finding balance doesn't necessarily mean dividing your time equally between caring and yourself.
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  SPEAKER_00: In some circumstances, the person you support may genuinely require a significant amount of your time and attention.
• 0:36
  SPEAKER_00: Instead, think about how you can make sure your needs remain present in the picture.
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  SPEAKER_00: Start by identifying what helps you function well.
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  SPEAKER_00: That might include enough sleep, eating regularly, exercise, seeing other people, attending your own appointments, or simply having periods when you're not responsible for anybody else.
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  SPEAKER_00: Then consider which of those things have gradually disappeared.
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  SPEAKER_00: Rather than waiting until you have a large amount of free time, look for realistic ways of putting some of them back.
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  SPEAKER_00: Perhaps somebody else could take over for an hour.
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  SPEAKER_00: You could accept an offer of help you would normally decline, or you could protect one regular activity that belongs to you.
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  SPEAKER_00: It can also help to distinguish between what genuinely needs to be done by you and what you've become accustomed to doing yourself.
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  SPEAKER_00: Caring can create a powerful sense of responsibility, and delegating something may initially feel uncomfortable.
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  SPEAKER_00: Relationships outside caring matter too.
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  SPEAKER_00: Staying connected with friends, family, or activities you enjoy isn't selfish.
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  SPEAKER_00: Those connections can help remind you that caring is something you do rather than the entirety of who you are.
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  SPEAKER_00: There will probably be times when the balance shifts and the person you care for needs more from you.
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  SPEAKER_00: The aim isn't to achieve a perfect balance every day, it's to make sure that over time your own well being doesn't disappear completely from consideration.
• 2:03
  SPEAKER_00: Your needs don't become less important simply because somebody you love needs you.