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Shedding Old Identities: Embracing True Self and New Chapters with Julie Nguyen · The Spiritual Shitshow Podcast

• 0:05
  Speaker 1: Welcome to the Spiritual Shit Show, where we dive headfirst into the messy, magical and transformative journey of being human.
• 0:13
  Speaker 1: I'm Julie Nguyen, a certified life coach, energy worker and psychic intuitive guide.
• 0:17
  Speaker 1: This podcast is your space for unfiltered conversations, practical tools and soul deep insights to help you live courageously and authentically, because you're not just here to grow, you're here to know what it's like to be fully alive.
• 0:32
  Speaker 1: You are a soul having a beautiful human experience and it's time to own it.
• 0:38
  Speaker 1: I believe in you and know that together we can inspire each other to be lighthouses guiding one another toward love, truth and authenticity.
• 0:46
  Speaker 1: Thank you for tuning in.
• 0:48
  Speaker 1: Now let's get started.
• 1:10
  Speaker 1: Welcome back to the Spiritual Shit Show.
• 1:10
  Speaker 1: I'm your host, julie Nguyen, your soul guide and intuitive channel and fellow traveler on this wild journey of self-discovery and spiritual awakening.
• 1:16
  Speaker 1: Today, we're diving into something that is both deeply challenging and incredibly liberating the process of shedding old identities and meeting yourself where you are now.
• 1:26
  Speaker 1: This is about letting go of the roles, masks, labels that no longer serve you, serve us so we can stand in our full radiance of the authentic self.
• 1:38
  Speaker 1: So grab your tea, your journal or just your curiosity and let's begin.
• 1:43
  Speaker 1: This morning I woke up and I looked at the date and it has been eight years since I embarked on what I've titled my spiritual shit show, and once I saw that eight-year mark past my seven-year spiritual sabbatical, I realized that it's like time, it is time.
• 2:01
  Speaker 1: It is time.
• 2:02
  Speaker 1: It is time to look at who I have become, look at who I am now, look at all of the work that I have done, and I realize that I have been shackled to my own personal suffering, because it's really been hard to let go of this question of who I am that's wrapped up in an old identity.
• 2:26
  Speaker 1: So this is what I am diving into for myself and this is what I want to share with you, because I think many of us hold on to these versions of ourselves that are no longer needed in our life and we're not taught how to celebrate these older versions of who we once were and allow for who we are becoming to be here to get online.
• 2:48
  Speaker 1: So let's start by getting real.
• 2:50
  Speaker 1: How many of you are carrying the weight of an old identity right now?
• 2:53
  Speaker 1: For me, it was this identity of being a business owner, of being an entrepreneur, of being a choreographer, of being a teacher, and I don't really have that anymore, and it's taken me a lot of years to shed that.
• 3:07
  Speaker 1: Really eight years of shedding identities and, at the same time, doing loads of inner child healing, loads of it.
• 3:18
  Speaker 1: And what I've discovered in all of that, it's like these parts, you know, the overachiever, the caregiver, the people pleaser, the teacher, the choreographer, the victim, even that these roles at one time served a purpose, and they too, serve a purpose in your life too.
• 3:36
  Speaker 1: They helped you survive, they help you adapt, they help you to fit into the world and make sense of self.
• 3:42
  Speaker 1: But here's the truth fit into the world and make sense of self.
• 3:48
  Speaker 1: But here's the truth.
• 3:48
  Speaker 1: Identities that once protected us can start to confine us.
• 3:50
  Speaker 1: They can be a catalyst for our own suffering.
• 3:53
  Speaker 1: They become like an ill fitted coat heavy, uncomfortable and holding us back from moving freely, from really allowing ourselves to be who we are now.
• 4:02
  Speaker 1: So take a moment to think about it.
• 4:04
  Speaker 1: Are you still clinging on to that person that you once were or you thought you should be?
• 4:13
  Speaker 1: Are you hanging on to an older version of self, maybe your childhood self, you know, the one that needed love and to be seen?
• 4:22
  Speaker 1: Or, you know, is your rebellious teenage self showing up and still needing to be seen and loved.
• 4:30
  Speaker 1: What are these versions of yourself that you can just honor, notice, witness, and maybe it's this idea of what other people expect you to be?
• 4:42
  Speaker 1: All of it's like keeping an outdated map of yourself when your inner landscape has already shifted.
• 4:50
  Speaker 1: Why is it so hard to shed and to let go of these old identities, these old versions of self?
• 4:56
  Speaker 1: Well, for one identity provides comfort If you think about it.
• 5:01
  Speaker 1: That's the first thing we ask people when we meet them.
• 5:04
  Speaker 1: Is so, what do you do?
• 5:06
  Speaker 1: It feels safe to have a response gives us purpose, even if it's limiting or if it's unfamiliar.
• 5:14
  Speaker 1: Our culture rewards consistency over growth.
• 5:18
  Speaker 1: We value what people do and what they have, and when you begin to move, allow yourself to have personal growth.
• 5:28
  Speaker 1: It's also hard to let go of old identities because people love to say you've changed, as if it's a bad thing.
• 5:34
  Speaker 1: But evolving is exactly what we are supposed to do.
• 5:40
  Speaker 1: And let's not forget the fear of the unknown, allowing yourself to shapeshift and change.
• 5:45
  Speaker 1: It's scary because you're pushing yourself into unfamiliar, unknown territory.
• 5:50
  Speaker 1: Who are you without these roles, these titles, these identities?
• 5:56
  Speaker 1: If you're not the mother anymore because now your kids have moved out of the house, or if you're not the entrepreneur, the moneymaker that you the house, or if you're not the entrepreneur, the moneymaker that you once were, or if you're not the caregiver, who are you?
• 6:11
  Speaker 1: This uncertainty can feel terrifying, but it's also where the magic happens and, as always, I am right here on this journey with you, and it truly is about allowing yourself to experience it in your body.
• 6:31
  Speaker 1: We can read all the self-development self-help books, listen to this podcast and our brain can make sense of it.
• 6:37
  Speaker 1: But it's our job to really fully embody the experience, the change, the shift, and that comes with self-awareness.
• 6:47
  Speaker 1: How do we meet ourselves where we are now?
• 6:49
  Speaker 1: We have to take an honest inventory of our identities.
• 6:50
  Speaker 1: We have to ask ourselves.
• 6:51
  Speaker 1: We have to take an honest inventory of our identities.
• 6:54
  Speaker 1: We have to ask ourself does this role align with who I am today?
• 6:59
  Speaker 1: And when I ask that for myself, it's like no, it's not, it's not.
• 7:03
  Speaker 1: Let it go, let it go, let it go.
• 7:05
  Speaker 1: Okay, moving on, am I clinging to this identity out of habit, fear or obligation?
• 7:11
  Speaker 1: My personal answer is oh my God, yes, oh, it's so hard to let go.
• 7:15
  Speaker 1: And my personal answer is oh my God, yes, oh, it's so hard to let go.
• 7:18
  Speaker 1: And the third one is who would I be without this label?
• 7:20
  Speaker 1: I'm really feeling this in my body today.
• 7:22
  Speaker 1: I am going to repeat those three questions without my personal reflections at the end, so we'll start again.
• 7:30
  Speaker 1: I want you to ask yourself these three things Does this role, this identity, this person, these habits, does this align with who I am today?
• 7:43
  Speaker 1: Today, am I clinging to this identity out of habit fear obligation, out of habit, fear obligation?
• 8:00
  Speaker 1: Or this question of who am I without it?
• 8:02
  Speaker 1: And then, who would I be without this label?
• 8:09
  Speaker 1: Wow.
• 8:15
  Speaker 1: And then, after a deep breath and a little bit of processing, comes in radical self-acceptance, knowing that this is not about trying to fix yourself.
• 8:19
  Speaker 1: This is actually about honoring all versions of yourself.
• 8:23
  Speaker 1: It's about embracing the messy, imperfect, glorious being that you are in this moment.
• 8:30
  Speaker 1: It's about honoring every step.
• 8:33
  Speaker 1: It's about honoring every step that you have taken on this path, knowing that it has all made you who you are today.
• 8:41
  Speaker 1: It's the remembrance that you don't need to become anything to be worthy.
• 8:47
  Speaker 1: You already are.
• 8:50
  Speaker 1: That is a daily reminder for myself.
• 8:53
  Speaker 1: So I'm going to say that again, because it may be something that you really need to hear again too.
• 8:58
  Speaker 1: You don't need to become anything to be worthy.
• 9:04
  Speaker 1: You already are Self-acceptance, honoring, holding, loving, all that was all that is.
• 9:17
  Speaker 1: And then, if you need it, you give yourself permission to grieve.
• 9:25
  Speaker 1: Shedding old identities is definitely a loss and you might feel untethered for a while, and that's okay.
• 9:31
  Speaker 1: The practice is sitting with that discomfort and when you can do that, know that that is an incredible sign that you are growing.
• 9:42
  Speaker 1: And here are some things that I am practicing today as I sit with allowing the old identity to finally be.
• 9:52
  Speaker 1: I'm just seeing, like you know, when a snake sheds its skin, I'm seeing that.
• 9:57
  Speaker 1: The shedding I'm going to honor that.
• 10:00
  Speaker 1: I'm going to do that by writing a sweet and tender goodbye letter to who I once was.
• 10:06
  Speaker 1: I'm going to thank her, I'm going to show her how incredible she was, I'm going to acknowledge these things that I've done and created and, yeah, I'm going to allow myself to be made anew.
• 10:22
  Speaker 1: So I'm actually going to change that.
• 10:23
  Speaker 1: It's not going to be a goodbye letter, it's going to be like a wow, thank you, I appreciate you, I am applauding you letter and then I'm going to say a positive affirmation of I allow myself to continue to become the brightest and best version of myself.
• 10:41
  Speaker 1: I allow myself to be wrapped in love and worth and incredible experiences.
• 10:47
  Speaker 1: I allow myself to be in the fullness of life.
• 10:52
  Speaker 1: This next practice is really interesting because I do this in a lot of my workshops and it's mirror work.
• 10:58
  Speaker 1: I simply just play music for two minutes, the music is my timer and I look at myself.
• 11:03
  Speaker 1: In workshops, we can either look at ourselves in the mirror or we look and gaze into the eyes of another and this always brings up deep, deep emotions, feelings, awarenesses of uncomfortability.
• 11:18
  Speaker 1: That's a word.
• 11:19
  Speaker 1: A lot of the times the women say I have a hard time looking at myself, which is always interesting.
• 11:23
  Speaker 1: So mirror work, I think, is really really important.
• 11:27
  Speaker 1: Allow yourself to see yourself.
• 11:29
  Speaker 1: I allow myself to be seen.
• 11:31
  Speaker 1: I allow myself to be seen.
• 11:34
  Speaker 1: I allow myself to be seen.
• 11:37
  Speaker 1: Another thing is movement.
• 11:38
  Speaker 1: As always, dancing is always an incredible form of celebration.
• 11:43
  Speaker 1: It also helps us to get into our body somatically.
• 11:45
  Speaker 1: Dance has been such a huge part of my own healing journey.
• 11:49
  Speaker 1: Dance, yoga or just simply shaking out your body helps you release stored energy and old patterns.
• 11:55
  Speaker 1: So move in ways that feel good.
• 11:58
  Speaker 1: I also love to just jump on a treadmill sometimes and just run out the feelings, the energy, the emotions, but whatever you choose, just remember that the movement itself should just be really intuitive, not performative.
• 12:13
  Speaker 1: And another thing that has been so helpful is soul support.
• 12:17
  Speaker 1: I will always, always, always, say this who you surround yourself with is key.
• 12:23
  Speaker 1: You have to surround yourself with people who honor you, who see you, who love your growth, who aren't trying to keep you in your old roles, who aren't shaming you or guilting you or making yourself or making you feel like you're batshit crazy, and again you will feel this in your body.
• 12:45
  Speaker 1: You will definitely feel this in your body.
• 12:47
  Speaker 1: Know who your safe soul people are and be with them as much as possible.
• 12:53
  Speaker 1: When you are on this spiritual growth, this spiritual evolution, it's cool because you get to meet yourself over and over and over and over and over again.
• 13:03
  Speaker 1: You get to really know self-love, you get to really be excited about who you are and how many of us do that versus always shaming or guilting or not thinking we're good enough or all of those things.
• 13:19
  Speaker 1: The most beautiful part of the journey and it's hard it's releasing these old identities so that you can create space for something new to emerge and that something is your truest, most authentic, brightest self, the part of you that's not defined by roles, achievements and expectations.
• 13:38
  Speaker 1: And this is hard.
• 13:41
  Speaker 1: This is hard when you don't define yourself by roles, achievements, expectations.
• 13:47
  Speaker 1: What do you do in identity?
• 13:50
  Speaker 1: You can feel worthless or lazy or whatever, but the truth is you are worthy just the way you are.
• 13:59
  Speaker 1: That the truth is I am light or I am a spirit always evolving, or I am.
• 14:05
  Speaker 1: I am light or I am a spirit always evolving, or I am.
• 14:07
  Speaker 1: I am incredible, I am smart, I am curious, I am, I am enjoying just being in my life.
• 14:14
  Speaker 1: And another thing I'll say is being is so much harder than doing.
• 14:20
  Speaker 1: It is so easy to keep ourselves busy and distracted and it's really hard just to allow yourself to be.
• 14:25
  Speaker 1: Path to meeting yourself is ongoing.
• 14:28
  Speaker 1: It's a constant dance, a dialogue of self-discovery, and this is incredible and this is beautiful, and this is what we are all doing and this is what we all need support in doing so, today, I want to leave you with this reminder you are allowed to change, you are allowed to outgrow things, you are allowed to become.
• 14:56
  Speaker 1: So what is one identity role story that you're ready to let go of, to shed, that you're ready to let go of to shed.
• 15:08
  Speaker 1: Take a moment to reflect on that question today.
• 15:10
  Speaker 1: Thank you for joining me on Spiritual Shit Show.
• 15:13
  Speaker 1: If this episode resonated, please share it with a friend or drop a review.
• 15:17
  Speaker 1: And until next time, keep showing up for yourself, even in the messy, uncertain and glorious moments of transformation.
• 15:24
  Speaker 1: I am always supporting you, my co-travelers, on this journey of life.
• 15:30
  Speaker 1: Till next time.