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ADJUST YOUR SAILS · The Karen Kenney Show

0:00
It's the Karen Kenney show. Hey you guys, welcome to the Karen
0:05
Kenney show. I'm super duper excited to be here with you
0:07
today, and the third time is a charm. I've tried to stop this
0:10
thing three times that I keep making myself laugh.
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Baby Jesus in a walnut shell, helped me. Okay, and we're back.
0:23
Hi. How are you guys doing out there? All right, we're gonna
0:27
dive. I'm just gonna start. I'm gonna start with the story.
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We're just gonna jump right into this thing. So I may have told
0:32
you guys in the past that a lot of times when I wake up in the
0:35
morning, like, first thing I do is I stop my spiritual practice
0:38
even while I'm in bed. But there are some mornings, like, I wake
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up and literally immediately there is a thought in my head. I
0:45
kind of talk about it, like word impressions, like all of a
0:48
sudden there is like a message or something like in my head. So
0:52
I woke up the other morning and the first thing that I heard in
0:55
my head was, adjust your sales. Adjust your sales. And meaning,
1:03
like, imagine if you're on a boat and, like, a sail boat.
1:07
Okay, so this is kind of like what happened the towards the
1:11
end of the year, right? I know a lot of people wait until like
1:15
December 31 they start thinking about, you know, New Year's
1:19
resolutions, New year, new you like all that stuff, and I'm not
1:24
really into the resolutions. I do like to kind of take a look
1:29
back on what my year has been like. I like to kind of start to
1:33
think about the kind of year I would like to have. I like to be
1:36
intentional in my mind. I like to decide what I'm going to
1:39
commit to, what I'm going to let go of all that stuff, and maybe
1:43
I'll do an episode about that again towards the end of the
1:46
year. But things have been on my mind about it. And when I heard
1:50
in my brain, right, when I heard in my mind, adjust your sales,
1:55
right? I woke up, I heard it, and it was like, you need to
1:58
adjust your sales. And one of the things I was thinking about
2:02
is this, are the things that I'm spending my time doing, are the
2:08
people that I'm spending or not spending time with, or whatever?
2:13
Are the thoughts that I'm thinking, are the things that I
2:15
am doing in my day to day life? Are they taking me in the
2:19
direction of where I really want to go. My current choices taking
2:26
me in the direction that I really want to go. And when I
2:31
woke up, and the first thing that I heard like, s, t o, t, J,
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spiritual team on the job. And I hear in my mind, adjust your
2:38
sales, like, Hey kid, you got some things where you need to
2:42
shift and adjust your sales because they are not taking you
2:46
in the right direction, right? So I'll just give you an
2:49
example. Let's say you have a habit of like, staying up too
2:53
late. Okay, and so let's say you had made a commit. I'm just
2:57
making these up, but I'll give you a personal one in a minute.
3:00
But let's just say you had made a commitment that you were going
3:03
to get up every day and you were going to move your body or go to
3:06
the gym or work out or stretch or do something, and you but you
3:10
were self sabotaging, or you were just consistently staying
3:14
up late, and then the morning time would come, and then you
3:17
couldn't get your ass out of bed, and then it was like You're
3:20
basically self sabotaging yourself from the get go, then
3:23
you have no energy. You don't go to the gym, you don't move your
3:26
body, take your walk, go for a run, whatever your thing is. And
3:29
then you're like, in this slump, and you're like, I don't feel
3:32
good. And then the end of the day, you have no energy. And
3:34
sometimes we have no energy because we haven't been moving
3:39
our bodies. I know that sounds counterintuitive, but you get
3:42
kind of sluggish. Things start to get kind of like I said,
3:46
instead of having like, like lightning in your veins or
3:48
energy like coursing through your body, things start to turn
3:51
to, like maple syrup and molasses, right? You start to
3:54
get like a little jelly inside. Oh, my God. Okay, let's say that
4:03
one of your goals, right? This would be a personal one for me,
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that one of my goals is to at least five days a week to make
4:09
progress on my book, to write every day, not every day, or
4:13
five days a week, or whatever it is, in the direction of getting
4:15
this first draft finally fucking finished, right? But I somehow
4:20
start to make other aspects of my life more important, like
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I'll get distracted by, I gotta get do a pod. Hello. I gotta, I
4:29
gotta get this podcast done, or I gotta send out this email. I
4:32
gotta remember to send the reminder emails for the nest. Or
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I gotta do this. Or I gotta, I gotta, I gotta, I gotta, I
4:37
gotta. There's always gonna be shit to do, all right, but
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there's only one book I'm working on, and it needs my
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time, it needs my attention, or whatever. So just giving you a
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thing, right? So it could be in any area of your life. It could
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be in your personal relationships, where like, you
4:54
like, want to be more present with your children. You want to,
4:57
like, show up for them, and like if you're going. To be like, on
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a walk with them, like to be with them so that you're seeing
5:04
what they're seeing and hearing what they're hearing, and you're
5:06
literally recording memories of their childhood life. And you're
5:10
starting to recognize, like, what catches their eye and what
5:13
lights them up in your present instead of being on your friggin
5:16
phone. So let's say that your goal was, I really want to be
5:18
present for my kids, like when I'm with them, I'm with them,
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but yet you find yourself like being on your phone, and you're
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starting to feel like, like their little, like
5:28
interruptions, like it's an inconvenience for you, right?
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Because you get sucked into the world of the internet or
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whatever, but So like, if your goal is, I want to be more
5:37
present for my children, but you're like, constantly got your
5:41
face embedded in your phone that is a place where you need to
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adjust your sales right, because they are not the way that is
5:49
blowing is not taking you in the direction that you want to go,
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that your current choice is not taking you right towards the
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outcome that you really want to have. Let's say that you're you
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know, you want to repair your relationship with your sweetie,
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or you want to have more connection with somebody, a
6:06
friend, a lover, your partner, your wife, your whoever, right?
6:10
But yet you find yourself falling into the same old
6:13
patterns of the way that you respond and react and think
6:16
about them, etc. It's like, Hey, kid, better adjust your sales.
6:20
Okay, so I was just thinking about this. So I think it's
6:24
important that as we're moving towards the end of 2025, and
6:28
we're sat, look, this suck is going to be done in like six
6:30
weeks, and we're wrapping this up, we're wrapping this year up,
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and it's like, Who do you want to be? How do you want to be in
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the world? And I know I talk about this a lot, because I
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really feel like this is one of the most important things in our
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lifetime. I think being really, really aware of how we're being
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physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually and
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spiritually, a lot of times gets like, left off, you know what I
6:58
mean? But like, Who are you being? How are you showing up?
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Are the choices that you're making actually in alignment? Is
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there congruency between what you say and like what you
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actually do? And I was just thinking about like, all the
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different places you can look at, right? Your physical health,
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your physical well being, and that itself can be broken down
7:18
into a bunch of different ways. Right? Talking about your
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nutrition, your your your nutrition, like what you're
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putting in your body, your sleep, your hydration, your
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movement and exercise, your rest and relaxation, like your
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nervous system, like all these things, right? You can look at
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your finances, right? That's another one. Let's say that you
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like, are like, hey, I really want to set up an emergency
7:40
fund. I want to have it. And I'm just making this number up,
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right? I want to have at least $1,000 saved it as a as a
7:46
security blanket, like in my savings account, in case
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something you know, crazy happens or whatever. And yet you
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find yourself buying $5 $7 coffees every day. Like that is
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not moving you in the direction. And I know I'm not saying skip
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your coffees. We can all find places where we are, where we
8:03
have a leak, right? Whether we have a leak in our spending
8:07
habits, when we have a leak in our energy spending habits, like
8:10
where we're putting our attention, we have a leak where
8:13
we're pouring into a project, a person, a program, a thing,
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where there's it's not like giving you or you're not, you're
8:20
not like, receiving the outcome, right? You can look at this
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thing and you're like, This is not going to end well, right? I
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need to adjust my sales, and while I was thinking about all
8:30
of this, right? So if you're looking at your health, your
8:33
finances, your relationships, like, all the different buckets,
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right, all the different buckets that you might have in your
8:40
life, you can, like, go right down the line, your business,
8:42
your creativity, your mental well being, like, all of it
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right time with friends, creativity, whatever it is. But
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we want to start looking at these things. You don't have to.
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I'm just inviting you to because I know for me, it
8:57
really helps me with, I always say, with the time I have left
9:00
on the planet, and no time is guaranteed, so with the time I
9:04
have left, I really do want to be living intentionally, right?
9:08
I want to be committing to things. And I'm going to do a
9:11
whole other podcast. Note to self, I should just write this
9:14
down. Hey, I'm going to write I'm literally going to write
9:16
this down so I don't forget, okay, about commitment and
9:20
consistency. Okay, done. All right. Here's the thing. This
9:25
also, when I was thinking about adjust your sales, this is a
9:28
little bit of, like, of a pot too. So number one, I'm going to
9:31
invite you to kind of take a look at your life. Take a look
9:34
at some of the different areas. And if that feels too
9:36
overwhelming, literally, you guys, like, get a piece of
9:39
paper, right? Like, I'm holding up, get, get a pad of paper, get
9:42
a piece of paper, and literally, just write down the different
9:44
buckets of your life. Again, it could be your health, right? And
9:48
your physical so you can do, like, physical, mental,
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emotional, spiritual, financial, like, whatever, all the
9:52
different buckets, and then kind of go through and look at be
9:56
real, take a fearless moral inventory, as they say, in the
9:59
20. 12 step programs and like, Get Get clear with yourself
10:03
before you can't get right with yourself until you're clear with
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yourself. You can't change something until you know that
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there's a problem. How do we know that there's a problem when
10:10
our sales need to be adjusted because we wanted to go south,
10:14
and we find ourselves at the North Pole, right? We might want
10:18
to, we might want to tweak some shit. Okay? But this also got me
10:22
to thinking about something that one of my spiritual teachers,
10:26
Eknath, ashwaran, you guys have heard me talk about ashwaran
10:29
Like endlessly on the podcast, and ashwaran one time quoted,
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and this is how I first heard the quote from Sri Ramakrishna.
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There's a quote that says, the grace of God is a wind which is
10:43
always blowing. The grace of God is a wind which is always
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blowing. I've also heard people say that it's the like Grace
10:54
they take. If you don't like the word God, you can just take the
10:56
word God out, but you can say grace is a wind, right? That is
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the Divine is a wind which is always blowing. Don't get weird
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about the name. I always say to people, don't get too hung up on
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the name, right? Because you miss the whole point of it. You
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miss the heartbeat of it. But the grace of God is a wind which
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is always blowing. And this is the thing. The second part of
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this is it's up to us to raise our sails, because the wind is
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always available to us, right? But we've got to, because I was
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thinking about this whole thing, like we need to adjust our
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sails. Well, that's implying that we actually have some sales
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in the game, like we have some sales raised, and if we do Amen,
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right? Double Amen, hands. Hallelujah. But some folks are
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sitting around and they're not even raising their sails. You
11:45
know what I'm saying? So we're going to get into this a little
11:48
bit, because I was started to thinking about, well, adjusting
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our sails. And I'm like, well, sometimes the wind is blowing in
11:55
such a way, right? And I'm like, I know that I cannot control the
11:59
direction of the wind, but what I can do is adjust my sails and
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respond right? Respond. So make some tweaks, as I was saying. So
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if I can't change the direction of the wind and the way that
12:13
it's blowing, maybe I can tweak how I'm responding to that. So
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whatever life is bringing to my door, right? I get to decide how
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I'm going to open that door and receive what is coming my way,
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how I'm going to respond to it, the choices that I'm going to
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make. So ashwaran kind of talks about it like this, you know, so
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if the winds of grace are always blowing, all we need to do is
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raise our sails. This means we've got to do our part. You
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know, a lot of times people talk about this idea of, like,
12:43
manifestation, like, I'm gonna manifest my dream job, I'm gonna
12:46
manifest my dream partner, I'm gonna all of us. I'm gonna
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manifest, you know, friggin Lamborghini, or a bunch of
12:53
money, or a wicked nice house, or whatever the thing is. And
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they always just think, well, I did my part, I made my order.
13:00
And I'm always like, look, God's not your Aaron boy, right? Like
13:04
the like, you don't just like, place your order at the drive
13:07
thru window and then sit back and wait for your wishes to be
13:11
fulfilled. This isn't rub the lamp and the genie gives you
13:14
three wishes. Like, you got to do your part. You know what I'm
13:17
saying. So ashwaran talks about it like this. He has, I mean, I
13:21
have over there, I'd show him to you, but I have all of his
13:24
books, right? And one of his, one of his books that is one of
13:27
my favorite books, is a book called Words To Live By. Words
13:31
To Live By. And I'm gonna, yeah, well, I'm not gonna mention it
13:36
right now, but okay, Words To Live By. It's a daily guide to
13:39
leading an exceptional life. That's the book. And this is
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what he said. And I love this. He says, All that you and I so
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this is it starts with the quote, the grace of God is a
13:49
wind which is always blowing. That's Sri Ramakrishna. And this
13:52
is a Sharon's commentary on that. He says, All that you and
13:55
I have to do is to put our sails, put up our sails, and let
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the wind of grace carry us across the sea of life to the
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other shore, but most of us, this always makes me laugh, but
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most of us are firmly stuck on the shore.
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Our sail is torn and our boat is overloaded with excess baggage,
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our likes and dislikes, our habits and opinions and all the
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resentments and hostilities which we have acquired right?
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And this is what A Course in Miracles would say is like your
14:27
grievances, right? You can have a grievance and you can have a
14:30
miracle, but you cannot have both. Okay, he goes on to say
14:33
this, but just as it is we ourselves who have acquired this
14:38
baggage, it is we who can also gradually learn to toss it
14:43
overboard. Right? The wind is blowing, but we have to make our
14:49
boat seaworthy. Oh, my God, I love this. We can patch up our
14:53
sail and unfurl it to catch the wind that will carry us to the
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other shore. Okay? So a lot of times, not only do we not even
15:02
have our sails raised, we also have a boat right, and we have a
15:07
sail that has holes in it, and we have a boat that is not
15:10
seaworthy, it is not ready. We are carrying all of this shit
15:13
from our past, all of those old stories, the beliefs, the
15:17
identities, right, those experiences that we had in our
15:21
earliest years in our environment, the beliefs that we
15:24
started to create, the meaning that we assigned to the awful,
15:27
traumatic things that happened, and the way that they can just
15:30
keep holding you down, man weighing you down so your boat
15:34
can't even get off the shore. It is like moored. It is like
15:38
stuck, like the anchor is like stuck on the ground. It's not
15:41
even sea worthy this boat. So we gotta do some shit, like we have
15:46
to be proactive. And so much of the work that I do with people
15:50
is about this. It's like, how can we create not only a nervous
15:55
system that is more resilient and resourceful and responsive,
15:59
right? But how can we, like, as a person, like, respond to life
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from a place where we're not afraid, we're not as fearful,
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because I said not as right, we're always going to have a
16:11
little fear that comes with the human experience. But how can I
16:15
show up in the world in a less fearful way? How can I show up
16:17
from a place of love and more safety? How can I respond to my
16:21
life and know that I have the inner resources to respond to
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whatever life brings to my door like I am resourceful, I am
16:32
responsive, I am able right to be able to like I trust myself
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to know, like so much of the work that I do is like helping
16:40
people to let go of, and I don't mean let go of like, Oh, it
16:44
didn't happen. And we pretend like, no, it's like really
16:48
reimagining what's possible for us, rewriting those old stories
16:52
and like, like, literally giving ourselves the tools that we need
16:57
so that we can navigate through life. This is like helping us to
17:00
set our sails. Number one, getting a sail, unburdening your
17:04
damn boat, right? Getting in the boat, having a sail that's
17:08
patched up so that it can blow you where you actually want to
17:12
go, right, so you can have the kind of life and relationships
17:16
and etc, etc, right, that you that you want to have. And it's
17:20
like we the wind is always blowing, if the wind is always
17:23
blowing, and we're just sitting there and we're not raising our
17:25
sails, opportunity just blows right over our head.
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Opportunities for love and compassion and connection and
17:33
friendship and joy and playfulness and creativity,
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right? All the good stuff of life just blows right on by,
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because we don't even know first of all that the wind is blowing.
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Can't be bothered to even look up, to recognize to go outside,
17:48
to get yourself in the element of life, like, oh yeah, some
17:51
shit, some shit, some winds blowing. What do I want to do? I
17:55
want to raise my sail, and I want to use that energy to take
17:58
me where I want to go. I don't know about you, but I want to
18:03
right be using that current of wind. And I can't always choose
18:07
which direction the wind is going to blow, but I can choose
18:10
how I'm going to adjust my sail to still get myself where I want
18:14
to go. And you know, I was thinking about this, and I made
18:18
a few notes here, and it's like, we have to prepare, right? We
18:24
have to prepare. So if God's grace, or the universe's grace,
18:28
is constantly, like, available to us, if it's always blowing,
18:32
it means that it's not dependent on, like, the mood of the day.
18:37
The winds of grace are always blowing what's needed from us,
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each person, each individual, we have to prepare ourselves to be
18:48
able to catch that wind, to receive the wind, and we do this
18:53
through our own efforts, our own preparedness, our own
18:57
willingness. Like to show up and to go, Hey, to notice, pay
19:02
attention. Enough like, oh yeah, the wind is blowing right. The
19:05
opportunities are there. There's love all around me, there's
19:09
compassion all around me, there is divine favor all around me.
19:16
But if we're not going to unfurl our sails, we're not gonna catch
19:23
jack shit, you know. Or we're just gonna keep choosing, right?
19:29
We're just gonna keep choosing, you know? And it is. I mean,
19:32
there's a thing, there's a thing that we talk about, like, oh,
19:35
spiritual amnesia. Sometimes is a spiritual amnesia. We're like,
19:39
where we just kind of forget who we are and to whom we belong.
19:42
But there's also what I can kind of jokingly call, like a little
19:46
spiritual laziness, where you're just not participatory. Like you
19:50
want an outcome, you want a particular outcome, but like you
19:53
don't want to do the work to get that outcome. You just want to
19:55
wish it into the atmosphere. You just want to wish it into the
19:58
ethos and expect. Like the angels to, like, float down on
20:01
their little wings. I'm making like, little flappy things,
20:03
like, I have little wings, and come down and deliver it to you.
20:08
I'm like, No, hello, Queen of Sheba, you are not, you know
20:11
what I mean. So we can't be weighed down by all of our
20:16
nonsense, our likes, our dislikes, our bullshit, our
20:19
baggage, our preference is like, you know, we got to be able, you
20:24
got to be able to adjust those sales man, because they can take
20:28
us to some pretty incredible places. That Divine Wind can
20:32
take us to some pretty incredible places, but we've got
20:35
to adjust our sails. So here's the thing again, it's an
20:42
invitation do it or don't do it. But I hope you do do it, because
20:46
when we sit down and spend some time with ourselves, and we
20:49
start to get honest with ourselves, and we start to look
20:51
at our lives, and we say, oh, like, how would I want this to
20:55
be different? Is something going on in my life that I'm not happy
20:59
about if I'm not happy about it, right? We always and can't just
21:02
blame it on other people. It's your life. It's your choices. We
21:05
got to take a look at our own role in things. And I love that.
21:08
You know, a lot of times people are afraid to look because
21:11
they're afraid to find out. They think, oh, it's all my fault,
21:14
and they feel guilty and ashamed, and they do the blame
21:16
game on themselves. First, I'd like to blame other people, and
21:19
then you get a certain amount of spiritual maturity and you
21:22
realize, like, oh, you realize, like, Oh yeah, I'm the common
21:24
denominator and all the shit in my life. I'm the captain of my
21:29
ship. Oh, my God. So I but I love that, because that means
21:33
that I actually do have some control. I do have some will. I
21:36
do have some say, You know what I mean? So this is, this is what
21:40
I'm saying. Like, I woke up and I heard in my head, you need to
21:43
adjust your sales. And so I took a good look. I've been thinking
21:47
about it, right? I've been thinking about it for the past
21:49
few days. And here's the thing, I'm taking action. I've already
21:52
taken action on a couple of things, which I'm really excited
21:54
about, you know? And I don't spend time beating myself up.
21:58
That's not that interesting to me. It's not that I don't take
22:01
accountability, but, like, if there's other people, I would
22:04
need to make amends to, like, get that done, but with myself,
22:07
it's like, yeah, I get to adjust. And it's, it's spent
22:10
energy, it's wasted energy, just sitting there, like, wishing I
22:13
had been different three days ago or three months ago, or
22:16
whatever. I'm like, What can I do now? The wind of grace is
22:19
blowing right now I'm going to raise my sale and I'm going to
22:22
adjust my sales accordingly, and that's what I want to invite you
22:26
in to do too. Don't be afraid of taking an inventory. Don't be
22:30
afraid of taking a look, an honest look, at what's going
22:33
down in your life, in your relationships, in your bank
22:36
accounts, in the your habits, the ways that you're being
22:39
physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually
22:43
and like, this is your life. Like you got to take it
22:46
seriously. We don't get to push it all. Keep saying, Oh, well,
22:50
next year I'll do this, or when i do when i Then I when I then
22:54
I, like, No, right now, right now. We got six weeks left to
22:58
this year. Let's sit our asses down. Let's get out some fun
23:01
paper and pen, some highlighters, some markers, some
23:03
crayons, right? Vision boarded, whatever you want to do, but
23:07
let's be honest about where we haven't been raising our sales,
23:11
where we have holes in our sales, and where we need to
23:14
adjust our sales. Okay, so that's my little love letter
23:17
from my heart to yours. I hope it's been helpful to you in some
23:21
ways. And I believe that Ramakrishna also talks about the
23:25
sails, is like your mind, right? Like, like the winds of the
23:29
Divine, God's grace is always blowing right above our heads.
23:33
But we have to raise our sails. We have to elevate our minds to
23:37
catch it. We got to catch the wind, right? So this is where I
23:41
always encourage you, if you do not have a DSP, a daily
23:44
spiritual practice, if you don't spend any time kind of
23:47
contemplating, the deeper the the more mystical the whatever
23:51
you want to the mysterious, the spiritual aspects of this human
23:56
this human experience, like we are. We are spiritual beings
23:59
having this human life, this human experience, we get to
24:02
experience ourselves and express ourselves. And what a gift,
24:05
right? So it's like, we got to raise ourselves. Part of this is
24:08
we got to elevate our minds, right? We got to go above like
24:11
this, like the baseline animalistic like wants and not
24:15
wants and the likes and the dislikes and the grievances and
24:17
all that shit. It's like, No, we got to kind of remember who we
24:21
are, right? Remember who you are, remember to whom you
24:24
belong. Catch that sale. We do this through, you know, effort.
24:30
Efforts not a bad thing. We kind of shrink away from discipline
24:33
and effort. I'm going to talk about that a numb boy. I gotta
24:35
keep writing myself little notes. Okay, these are good
24:42
things. These are good things. So, yeah, that's what I got for
24:46
you today. Okay, I love you. I appreciate you so much.
24:48
Remember, you can always find out all the different ways to
24:52
connect with me, work with me, take a yoga class, take a
24:55
writing salon, like participate all of it right at. Karen
25:00
kenney.com it's k, e, n, n, e, y, right.com. All my stuff is on
25:06
there. And if you want to get this in your inbox each week the
25:10
podcast, if you want to find out what I'm up to, I'm gonna have
25:13
some new things I'm doing in 2026 so if you want to find out
25:17
what those shenanigans are, just get on my email list. Karen
25:19
kenney.com/sign up one word. Okay, thanks, you guys. I
25:24
appreciate you so much wherever you go. May you leave yourself
25:29
in the people, in the place, in the animals, in the planet
25:32
better than how you found it wherever you go. May you and
25:35
your presence and your love and your energy and your sails and
25:40
the wind right. May the wind be at your back right, may it
25:44
wherever you go, may you be blessing. Bye. Hey, thanks so
25:49
much for listening to the show. I really love spending some time
25:53
together. Now, if you dig the show or know someone that could
25:56
benefit from this episode, please share it with them and
25:59
help me to spread the good word and the love. And if you want to
26:03
be in the know about all of my upcoming shenanigans, head on
26:07
over to Karen kenney.com/sign up and join my list. It'll be
26:13
wicked fun to stay in touch. Bye. You.