Latest / ok storytime / My roommate invited a STRANGER in while I was asleep... I wasn't even wearing pants! -r/amiwrong | Reddit Stories | EP3122

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My roommate invited a STRANGER in while I was asleep... I wasn't even wearing pants! -r/amiwrong | Reddit Stories | EP3122 · ok storytime

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Hey, this is Angie.
• 0:01
  Speaker 2: And this is Carly, your favorite OK Storytime hosts, and
• 0:04
  Speaker 2: we've got some great stories coming up.
• 0:06
  Speaker 1: But before that, we have a quick two-minute break from
• 0:08
  Speaker 1: our sponsors that keep the show alive.
• 0:12
  Speaker 3: My roommate invited a stranger in while I was asleep.
• 0:16
  Speaker 1: I wasn't even wearing pants!
• 0:19
  Speaker 3: We've known each other for years, and prior to agreeing
• 0:22
  Speaker 3: to be roommates, we talked about a few ground rules.
• 0:24
  Speaker 3: She said that she did not plan on bringing guys
• 0:27
  Speaker 3: over because she's not that type of person. This was great,
• 0:30
  Speaker 3: because we share a traditional dorm room. For those who
• 0:33
  Speaker 3: don't know, that means you share a room with one
• 0:35
  Speaker 3: other person with maybe three feet between the beds, yeah.
• 0:38
  Speaker 3: She knows I have a very early class, which is
• 0:41
  Speaker 3: essential to my major. On Tuesday afternoon, we discussed rules
• 0:44
  Speaker 3: about bringing gentleman callers, if you know what I mean.
• 0:47
  Speaker 3: I said I had no problem with her having guys
• 0:49
  Speaker 3: over as long as she let me know beforehand, so
• 0:51
  Speaker 3: I wasn't there. On Tuesday night, she woke me up
• 0:54
  Speaker 3: at 1am bringing a guy in. I sleep without pants
• 0:58
  Speaker 3: and she knows this. So imagine my surprise when I'm
• 1:02
  Speaker 3: woken up by a guy just standing at the foot
• 1:04
  Speaker 3: of my bed. They left and came back again around
• 1:07
  Speaker 3: 2.30 and this time he stayed. He kept me up
• 1:10
  Speaker 3: the whole night laughing and talking. I would have told
• 1:13
  Speaker 3: him to leave, but he was much bigger and stronger
• 1:16
  Speaker 3: than I am. He's a football player and I'm short, chubby,
• 1:18
  Speaker 3: and not very athletic.
• 1:20
  Speaker 4: So you can still take him on. You can still
• 1:22
  Speaker 4: just tell him, hey.
• 1:23
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you think he's going to like attack you?
• 1:25
  Speaker 5: Dude, all you got to do is drive the nuts
• 1:26
  Speaker 5: and you're fine.
• 1:27
  Speaker 1: He's a football player. I didn't want to tell him
• 1:29
  Speaker 1: to leave.
• 1:30
  Speaker 4: Or just be like, I'm calling, I don't know, security
• 1:33
  Speaker 4: or like RAs or whatever.
• 1:35
  Speaker 3: He didn't leave until after four in the morning. I
• 1:39
  Speaker 3: was pissed, needless to say. By the way, this comes
• 1:42
  Speaker 3: from backgroundfriend06, and if you want to submit your own stories,
• 1:45
  Speaker 3: go to the r slash OKStoryTime subreddit.
• 1:47
  Speaker 1: I'm Savannah.
• 1:48
  Speaker 5: I'm Riley.
• 1:49
  Speaker 4: I'm Keon.
• 1:50
  Speaker 1: And we are here to talk about some stuff, give
• 1:53
  Speaker 1: some advice, and we don't have all your answers. We're
• 1:56
  Speaker 1: only going to tell you what we would do. But
• 1:57
  Speaker 1: let us know what you would do down in the comments.
• 2:00
  Speaker 1: As Opie says.
• 2:02
  Speaker 3: I talked to my roommate about it and she apologized
• 2:04
  Speaker 3: because he was loud, not because she invited him without
• 2:07
  Speaker 3: informing me. Our housing policy states that overnight guests have
• 2:10
  Speaker 3: to be agreed on by all roommates.
• 2:13
  Speaker 1: And the other people are supposed to be given at
• 2:16
  Speaker 1: least 24 hours notice.
• 2:17
  Speaker 3: Not that I needed that much notice. It would have
• 2:19
  Speaker 3: just been nice to know beforehand. On Thursday, she woke
• 2:22
  Speaker 3: me up again before my class started. coming in from
• 2:25
  Speaker 3: partying being very loud. This has really started to affect
• 2:28
  Speaker 3: my energy going into my day and makes paying attention
• 2:30
  Speaker 3: in class difficult because I'm tired. On my way back
• 2:33
  Speaker 3: to campus Sunday, she said she's bringing someone else over
• 2:36
  Speaker 3: and I tell her we need to talk about her
• 2:38
  Speaker 3: guest policy. When I'm back in the dorm, a large
• 2:41
  Speaker 3: group of us were in the common area and someone
• 2:43
  Speaker 3: brings up whether a person should leave in the event
• 2:46
  Speaker 3: their roommate brings an overnight guest. I say their roommate
• 2:49
  Speaker 3: shouldn't have to leave the bed they paid for, and
• 2:51
  Speaker 3: they keep grilling me about it, why I'm so against it.
• 2:55
  Speaker 3: I then tell them about what happened Tuesday night, and
• 2:58
  Speaker 3: everyone loses their mind. They say I'm an awful person
• 3:02
  Speaker 3: for airing out my roommate. However, I didn't go into
• 3:05
  Speaker 3: detail about what I saw out of respect for her.
• 3:08
  Speaker 3: My roommate then blows up on me, saying she's going
• 3:10
  Speaker 3: to continue to have guys over the whole night, that
• 3:12
  Speaker 3: I'm not being a real one, and that she would
• 3:15
  Speaker 3: do the same for me. To clarify, I'm not a prude.
• 3:18
  Speaker 3: I just had issues with the lack of communication and
• 3:20
  Speaker 3: how abruptly everything happened. On top of feeling uncomfortable in
• 3:24
  Speaker 3: my own room, I am not comfortable sleeping in the
• 3:26
  Speaker 3: same room as some random man she had only met
• 3:29
  Speaker 3: that night.
• 3:30
  Speaker 4: Go back to their place, honestly.
• 3:31
  Speaker 5: Yeah, I need a good handshake, know that he's okay.
• 3:35
  Speaker 5: That's all I need.
• 3:36
  Speaker 4: Time to be gross, OP. You just either tell her,
• 3:38
  Speaker 4: I'm going to tell the RA, or I'm going to
• 3:40
  Speaker 4: be just really gross.
• 3:42
  Speaker 3: After a while, more people came in, and similar to
• 3:45
  Speaker 3: the game telephone, the story became more and more convoluted.
• 3:49
  Speaker 3: I clarified any misgivings and told everyone calling her names
• 3:53
  Speaker 3: to knock it off. After everything was said and done,
• 3:56
  Speaker 3: I went back to my room. My room was very
• 3:58
  Speaker 3: close to the common area, so I could hear everything.
• 4:01
  Speaker 3: My roommate started to speak poorly of me as soon
• 4:03
  Speaker 3: as I left, saying I had no friends and no
• 4:06
  Speaker 3: one liked me. The group then started to make fun
• 4:08
  Speaker 3: of me because I'm a virgin.
• 4:10
  Speaker 2: Nope.
• 4:11
  Speaker 3: And to the comments, I've been in a long-term relationship
• 4:13
  Speaker 3: for two years and we think we're going to wait
• 4:16
  Speaker 3: until marriage.
• 4:17
  Speaker 4: Dude, that's totally cool.
• 4:20
  Speaker 3: This has been going on four days and it makes
• 4:22
  Speaker 3: it extremely difficult to even leave my room to go
• 4:25
  Speaker 3: get food because they're always.
• 4:26
  Speaker 1: In the common area talking about me.
• 4:28
  Speaker 3: I think my roommate may have shared some of my
• 4:30
  Speaker 3: personal information because now they laugh when I walk by.
• 4:34
  Speaker 3: Am I wrong for calling out my roommate for keeping
• 4:36
  Speaker 3: me up with an overnight guest?
• 4:39
  Speaker 4: No, you have boundaries.
• 4:40
  Speaker 5: You've been trying to communicate this she's not respecting him.
• 4:43
  Speaker 4: You guys are on the same page.
• 4:45
  Speaker 3: It's weird and it doesn't seem like she's trying to
• 4:48
  Speaker 3: compromise to be on the same page either like she
• 4:49
  Speaker 3: doesn't even want to have like the conversation or anything
• 4:51
  Speaker 3: i don't know to.
• 4:52
  Speaker 5: Be fair i didn't like my roommate in college it's
• 4:55
  Speaker 5: kind of weird There's an.
• 4:56
  Speaker 1: Edit to add.
• 4:57
  Speaker 3: I talked to my roommate about the situation on Wednesday
• 4:59
  Speaker 3: at the gym after my class. It seemed like we
• 5:02
  Speaker 3: were on the same page then, but clearly not, given
• 5:05
  Speaker 3: the conversation we had on Sunday. For anyone says I'm
• 5:08
  Speaker 3: telling her business, it's well known she has guys over.
• 5:11
  Speaker 1: She brags about it all the time. And there's an update.
• 5:14
  Speaker 3: Two days later, I had a meeting with her program
• 5:17
  Speaker 3: director and explained the situation. And she said she understands
• 5:21
  Speaker 3: why I want to move. However, moving at this time
• 5:24
  Speaker 3: may not be happening. because they're still accounting for spaces
• 5:28
  Speaker 3: actually taken versus those still available. I also emailed the
• 5:31
  Speaker 3: professor in the discussion-based course everyone and I share, claiming
• 5:35
  Speaker 3: that I don't feel comfortable joining a lot of the
• 5:37
  Speaker 3: discussions because of the things people are still saying. As
• 5:40
  Speaker 3: far as things between my roommate and I, I wouldn't
• 5:42
  Speaker 3: say things are going well. We only talk when she's
• 5:45
  Speaker 3: in the room, if that. She said she was upset
• 5:48
  Speaker 3: I told her business. However, now that everything is said
• 5:51
  Speaker 3: and done, people who were actually there that night are
• 5:54
  Speaker 3: acknowledging that her retelling blows the situation way out of
• 5:57
  Speaker 3: proportion and makes it seem like I told everything that
• 6:01
  Speaker 3: happened with her guest. I also tried to get her
• 6:04
  Speaker 3: to see things from my perspective and reiterated that we
• 6:06
  Speaker 3: discussed the subject several times and she went back.
• 6:09
  Speaker 1: On our agreement.
• 6:10
  Speaker 2: Ugh.
• 6:11
  Speaker 4: This is just giving freshmen, like, such a fresh, like,
• 6:13
  Speaker 4: this happens, this happened to, like, so many people. Well,
• 6:16
  Speaker 4: you gotta fight in order to get a new roommate.
• 6:18
  Speaker 4: At this point, she's not happy.
• 6:19
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 6:20
  Speaker 4: But this, this happened to so many people. Thankfully, not me, but, like,
• 6:23
  Speaker 4: a lot of my friends or people in the dorm
• 6:25
  Speaker 4: were just like, I hate my roommate. Or, like, I
• 6:27
  Speaker 4: can't live with my roommate. I'm like, well, why? It'd
• 6:29
  Speaker 4: just be reasons like this or even something sillier than this.
• 6:33
  Speaker 4: And you go, okay.
• 6:34
  Speaker 3: She left after that and went back to crap talking.
• 6:38
  Speaker 3: I met with my R.A., And the things she can
• 6:41
  Speaker 3: do are very limited due to updates in the housing policy.
• 6:45
  Speaker 3: She said she understood exactly how I felt, but didn't
• 6:48
  Speaker 3: want me to have to leave. My floor and wing
• 6:51
  Speaker 3: are currently under fire with the housing department due to
• 6:54
  Speaker 3: how late and loud their get togethers are on top
• 6:57
  Speaker 3: of the smoking and drinking.
• 6:59
  Speaker 4: Oh, gotcha. Not actually lit on fire, but like they're
• 7:02
  Speaker 4: under a lot of pressure.
• 7:03
  Speaker 3: She suggested a mediated meeting between my roommate and I
• 7:07
  Speaker 3: to sign a housing contract. At this point, I'm just
• 7:10
  Speaker 3: going to have to buy a sleep mask and couch
• 7:12
  Speaker 3: surf on the nights she wants to have guys over.
• 7:15
  Speaker 3: Our friendship is basically non-existent, and it feels like she
• 7:18
  Speaker 3: envies my relationship with my boyfriend based on what she
• 7:21
  Speaker 3: said in class today. She's always looking down on people
• 7:24
  Speaker 3: and picking on their insecurities, making fun of their bodies, faces,
• 7:27
  Speaker 3: skin tones, and various other things. She complained about how
• 7:31
  Speaker 3: she's pretty enough to be messed with, but not pretty
• 7:35
  Speaker 3: enough to be someone's girlfriend. Which is ironic because she
• 7:38
  Speaker 3: dumped her boyfriend before coming to college because she didn't
• 7:40
  Speaker 3: want to be tied down. Some advice I saw in
• 7:43
  Speaker 3: the comments was to just go out there. But every
• 7:46
  Speaker 3: time I leave my room, they.
• 7:47
  Speaker 1: Start whispering or stop talking altogether.
• 7:50
  Speaker 3: I might have another meeting with our program director to
• 7:52
  Speaker 3: discuss next steps. But so far, these are all the
• 7:55
  Speaker 3: updates that come to mind. Thank you all so much.
• 7:59
  Speaker 3: Update two, almost two weeks later. Last Tuesday, my roommate
• 8:03
  Speaker 3: asked if she could have a guy over. many hours
• 8:06
  Speaker 3: in advance. She said he would be at our dorm
• 8:10
  Speaker 3: by nine and gone by 10 or 1030.
• 8:12
  Speaker 1: At the latest.
• 8:13
  Speaker 3: I agreed because it was within a reasonable timeframe and
• 8:16
  Speaker 3: she'd asked very early. This guy was driving in from
• 8:19
  Speaker 3: our hometown about an hour away. It's close to nine
• 8:23
  Speaker 3: by this point and the guy still hasn't shown up.
• 8:25
  Speaker 3: So I make small talk about him. I asked who
• 8:28
  Speaker 3: the guy was that kept coming to see her. She
• 8:30
  Speaker 3: responded by correcting me and saying, guys, plural. I was shocked,
• 8:35
  Speaker 3: but let her continue. Turns out it's been a different
• 8:38
  Speaker 3: guy every time. While I'm not judging her lifestyle, I
• 8:42
  Speaker 3: find it odd that she's so comfortable bringing these guys
• 8:45
  Speaker 3: she barely knows to her living space. By 1030, she
• 8:49
  Speaker 3: came in saying he was playing basketball, but still coming.
• 8:52
  Speaker 4: Dude, ball is life. Yes. My man. I can't blame him.
• 8:58
  Speaker 5: I'd be doing that.
• 8:59
  Speaker 3: I would say, no, I'm sorry, but I'm going to
• 9:02
  Speaker 3: bed now and He's not coming over. You gave me
• 9:06
  Speaker 3: the time frame. I agreed to the time frame. It
• 9:07
  Speaker 3: is now past that. So no, he cannot be here.
• 9:10
  Speaker 4: Go bounce some balls with him.
• 9:13
  Speaker 3: 11 rolled around and the guy still hadn't shown up.
• 9:16
  Speaker 3: At this point, I assumed he stood her up and
• 9:18
  Speaker 3: started getting ready for bed. At around 11.20, I'm putting
• 9:21
  Speaker 3: on my bonnet to go to bed and she says
• 9:24
  Speaker 3: the guy is here and she's bringing him up. I
• 9:27
  Speaker 3: tell her it's late, but before we can continue, she
• 9:29
  Speaker 3: rushes out and says, I'm much appreciated. I go wait
• 9:33
  Speaker 3: out in the common area close to midnight. Our guy
• 9:36
  Speaker 3: RA sees me and asks what I'm still doing outside.
• 9:39
  Speaker 3: He asked if I had class the next morning. I
• 9:41
  Speaker 3: said I did, but that I couldn't go back.
• 9:43
  Speaker 1: In my room.
• 9:43
  Speaker 3: He said it was my room too and told me
• 9:46
  Speaker 3: to let him know if the issue continued so we
• 9:48
  Speaker 3: could have a meeting. When 12 hit, I texted my
• 9:51
  Speaker 3: roommate asking if the guy was leaving soon. She said
• 9:53
  Speaker 3: to give them a minute and that minute turned into
• 9:56
  Speaker 3: half an hour. When 12.30 came around, I told her
• 9:59
  Speaker 3: the guy needed to leave. and I didn't end up
• 10:00
  Speaker 3: getting back in my room till around 12.45. My boyfriend
• 10:04
  Speaker 3: was on the phone with me through everything because he
• 10:06
  Speaker 3: felt uncomfortable with me being outside that late. I had
• 10:09
  Speaker 3: an 8 a.m. the following day, which I slept through
• 10:12
  Speaker 3: because I was so exhausted.
• 10:14
  Speaker 4: If my roommate did this, I'm like, I don't care.
• 10:17
  Speaker 2: Ow.
• 10:17
  Speaker 4: I'm fine. I'm going to stand there and play weird
• 10:20
  Speaker 4: animal sounds. Playing whale noises.
• 10:22
  Speaker 5: Nah, dude. Easiest thing, you start playing a LeBron James
• 10:26
  Speaker 5: highlight reel, the guy will come outside. Who wouldn't watch that?
• 10:29
  Speaker 5: He's a basketball dude. Come on.
• 10:31
  Speaker 3: I told my parents about the situation before I left
• 10:34
  Speaker 3: for class. My dad ended up calling the school and
• 10:36
  Speaker 3: talking to someone from housing. Originally, they were reluctant to
• 10:39
  Speaker 3: even look into the issue, saying they didn't know what
• 10:42
  Speaker 3: the RAs had done to fix it, so it was
• 10:44
  Speaker 3: out of their control. My dad then asked how an
• 10:47
  Speaker 3: issue of my safety was out of their control since
• 10:50
  Speaker 3: the first incident happened without my consent or acknowledgement. After that,
• 10:54
  Speaker 3: housing contacted me to ask for details, which I gave them.
• 10:57
  Speaker 3: They said they'd have the RAs talk to my roommate
• 10:59
  Speaker 3: while they finished checking for vacancies. On Thursday, I tried
• 11:02
  Speaker 3: to give my roommate a heads up, That housing might
• 11:04
  Speaker 3: come talk to her, but turns out they already had.
• 11:07
  Speaker 3: And she was upset. I understand her frustration. However, I
• 11:11
  Speaker 3: did try to talk to her about the issue several
• 11:13
  Speaker 3: times and at that point felt like my time was
• 11:16
  Speaker 3: being disrespected. She started to go off on me about
• 11:19
  Speaker 3: how I don't like the way she lives. I told
• 11:21
  Speaker 3: her it wasn't even that. Our schedules just don't align
• 11:24
  Speaker 3: and it's starting to affect my sleep. For me, sleeping
• 11:27
  Speaker 3: isn't just important for school, but also for my health.
• 11:29
  Speaker 3: I'm slightly pre-diabetic. And I've been working hard to change
• 11:33
  Speaker 3: my habits with eating, sleeping, and exercise to stop things
• 11:36
  Speaker 3: from progressing. I told her all this when I was
• 11:39
  Speaker 3: first diagnosed. So she knows, which is what makes the
• 11:42
  Speaker 3: situation all the more frustrating.
• 11:45
  Speaker 4: She doesn't care.
• 11:45
  Speaker 5: She really doesn't.
• 11:47
  Speaker 1: I am going to finish this.
• 11:49
  Speaker 3: Halzine reached out to me that afternoon about an opening
• 11:52
  Speaker 3: in a suite-style dorm. I accepted their offer as soon
• 11:55
  Speaker 3: as I got it. My girl RA reached out and
• 11:58
  Speaker 3: said my roommate was willing to mediate after she found
• 12:01
  Speaker 3: out about the news. It felt like too little too late,
• 12:05
  Speaker 3: so I politely declined, saying that even with mediation, the
• 12:10
  Speaker 3: issue may persist and start to affect me on more
• 12:12
  Speaker 3: important days, like nights before exams or big projects. My
• 12:16
  Speaker 3: RA told me she understood and apologized for not being
• 12:18
  Speaker 3: able to do more. I packed to move out on
• 12:21
  Speaker 3: Friday and left to go home for the weekend. She
• 12:23
  Speaker 3: wasted no time removing me from the group chat we
• 12:26
  Speaker 3: had for the women in our community. We haven't talked
• 12:29
  Speaker 3: since Friday and with the way things are going, we
• 12:31
  Speaker 3: probably won't. She's a completely different person than who I
• 12:35
  Speaker 3: graduated high school with. I moved in on Sunday and
• 12:38
  Speaker 3: my new roommates have been great. We all live pretty
• 12:41
  Speaker 3: separate lives, so there's not really any interference. I don't
• 12:44
  Speaker 3: know if I handled the situation correctly. If more could
• 12:46
  Speaker 3: have been done on my end, let me know in
• 12:48
  Speaker 3: the comments. That's all that comes to mind for now.
• 12:51
  Speaker 3: I don't think really no one was doing anything for you.
• 12:54
  Speaker 3: Not that everyone was against you, but no one was
• 12:56
  Speaker 3: really taking this issue seriously. So it's like, you know,
• 13:00
  Speaker 3: all I wanted was like a safe place to come home.
• 13:03
  Speaker 4: I just think, OP, you kind of just let her
• 13:06
  Speaker 4: get away with it. You weren't giving her consequences. You're like,
• 13:08
  Speaker 4: I'm going to tell on you. And you told on
• 13:09
  Speaker 4: her and there were still no consequences. I would have
• 13:11
  Speaker 4: been like, lock the door or like, no.
• 13:14
  Speaker 5: Something like that.
• 13:15
  Speaker 4: Good on you, dude.
• 13:16
  Speaker 5: And if you wanted to get that guy out, just
• 13:18
  Speaker 5: play Russell Westbrook highlights. Just start dribbling the basketball. He
• 13:21
  Speaker 5: would have came out.
• 13:22
  Speaker 4: Like, oh, there's a basketball. I need to play. That's
• 13:24
  Speaker 4: how we function.
• 13:25
  Speaker 5: I love it.
• 13:26
  Speaker 4: And that's the end of this story. We're good to go.
• 13:28
  Speaker 4: On to the next one.
• 13:30
  Speaker 1: My roommate's dog bonded with me. Now they're all jealous.
• 13:33
  Speaker 1: It's my dog now. I, 19 male, live in a
• 13:36
  Speaker 1: five-bedroom apartment with a brother-sister pair and two other random
• 13:39
  Speaker 1: female roommates. The two other girls are not really relevant
• 13:42
  Speaker 1: to this situation. We all attend college together and range
• 13:45
  Speaker 1: from freshmen to juniors. Basically, they adopted a puppy all
• 13:49
  Speaker 1: five of us agreed and were fine with. That's a
• 13:52
  Speaker 1: good start.
• 13:52
  Speaker 4: Heck yeah.
• 13:53
  Speaker 1: They told us they would take care of the puppy
• 13:55
  Speaker 1: and have stayed true to that. They walk, feed, play with,
• 13:58
  Speaker 1: and are currently obedience training it. They're the only ones
• 14:01
  Speaker 1: who give the puppy treats and none of us feed
• 14:04
  Speaker 1: the puppy human food. The issue is the puppy Lucy
• 14:07
  Speaker 1: has bonded with me. I walk in the room and
• 14:10
  Speaker 1: she runs up super excited. She does not do this
• 14:13
  Speaker 1: for anyone else. It licks me. Also something it does
• 14:16
  Speaker 1: not do to anyone else. Opie does not care about
• 14:18
  Speaker 1: this dog.
• 14:19
  Speaker 4: Um, actually.
• 14:21
  Speaker 5: In the Eastern culture, they refer to pets as it
• 14:25
  Speaker 5: rather than assigning a he or she.
• 14:27
  Speaker 1: I just think it's funny because she started off with
• 14:30
  Speaker 1: saying she and then she changed to it.
• 14:32
  Speaker 5: Well, maybe that just is how she goes.
• 14:34
  Speaker 1: Maybe she's half Western, half Eastern culture.
• 14:37
  Speaker 5: Maybe it's hard to keep up with the, you know,
• 14:40
  Speaker 5: pronunciation of sentences and how we go with it.
• 14:42
  Speaker 1: By the way, this comes from one throwaway, 098748. And
• 14:46
  Speaker 1: if you want to submit your own stories, go to
• 14:47
  Speaker 1: the r slash showcase story time subreddit. I'm Sophia.
• 14:50
  Speaker 5: I'm Riley.
• 14:51
  Speaker 4: I'm Keon.
• 14:51
  Speaker 1: And we're here to give good advice goofily, but we
• 14:53
  Speaker 1: don't have all the answers. We only know what we do.
• 14:55
  Speaker 1: So let us know what you would do in the comments.
• 14:57
  Speaker 1: And Opie says, Lucy follows me around whenever I'm in
• 15:00
  Speaker 1: the apartment, never leaving my side unless I close my
• 15:04
  Speaker 1: room door or she's sleeping. I do play with Lucy
• 15:06
  Speaker 1: when I'm home. Aw, Lucy likes you. She, like, likes you.
• 15:08
  Speaker 1: She loves you. Maybe that's why. Yeah, Opie's like, I
• 15:34
  Speaker 1: just pet her.
• 15:35
  Speaker 4: I pet her, but then I don't give her the
• 15:38
  Speaker 4: attention that she wants.
• 15:39
  Speaker 1: And then she gets upset because she wants it.
• 15:40
  Speaker 4: The attention from me.
• 15:42
  Speaker 1: I also don't feel like it is my fault Lucy
• 15:44
  Speaker 1: is bonded with me. I can't control her. I know
• 15:47
  Speaker 1: she isn't my dog. At night, she sleeps in the
• 15:49
  Speaker 1: male owner's bed. I guess my question is, how do
• 15:52
  Speaker 1: we resolve this? I'm more worried about calming owners down
• 15:55
  Speaker 1: than I am about Lucy giving me attention. My other
• 15:58
  Speaker 1: roommates have a We're staying out of this attitude. And
• 16:02
  Speaker 1: we've got an update, folks.
• 16:03
  Speaker 4: What's the problem?
• 16:05
  Speaker 1: The dog likes OP.
• 16:07
  Speaker 4: Everyone's upset that Lucy, a.k.a. the dog, likes OP.
• 16:11
  Speaker 5: What I'm trying to say is I don't think there
• 16:13
  Speaker 5: is a problem here.
• 16:14
  Speaker 1: There's no problem.
• 16:15
  Speaker 4: But the owner is the problem because the owner's upset
• 16:18
  Speaker 4: that their dog likes OP more.
• 16:21
  Speaker 1: We don't even know if the dog likes OP more.
• 16:24
  Speaker 1: It just seems like the dog likes OP.
• 16:27
  Speaker 5: And the owners are.
• 16:29
  Speaker 2: Update.
• 16:30
  Speaker 1: Let's start by saying that went horribly. My lovely roommates
• 16:33
  Speaker 1: offered to gift me Lucy because she likes me so much.
• 16:36
  Speaker 4: Okay. I would take her.
• 16:38
  Speaker 1: Opie's 19. In college, I would not have time for
• 16:41
  Speaker 1: a dog.
• 16:42
  Speaker 4: I mean, I would. Five roommates. If we had a
• 16:45
  Speaker 4: dog here and.
• 16:46
  Speaker 5: Everyone was pretty chill with it, everyone was on the
• 16:48
  Speaker 5: same page, dog would be fine. It'd be like Chip.
• 16:50
  Speaker 4: Chip's chill.
• 16:51
  Speaker 1: Okay, but now imagine you, 19, in college, doing all
• 16:57
  Speaker 1: this work, and they say, now you have to take
• 16:59
  Speaker 1: care of the dog. We're not going to help. I
• 17:02
  Speaker 1: would not. You know what? I'm going to just say I, 19,
• 17:04
  Speaker 1: would not be able to take care of a dog.
• 17:06
  Speaker 4: I can help out, but I do not want to
• 17:09
  Speaker 4: own the dog.
• 17:10
  Speaker 1: I do not have time to own a dog or
• 17:11
  Speaker 1: the funds to care for a dog. I told them no,
• 17:15
  Speaker 1: and they aren't happy. Yeah, that's it. That's it. I
• 17:19
  Speaker 1: also would have told them no.
• 17:21
  Speaker 4: That's wild.
• 17:22
  Speaker 5: Now I didn't think about the funds of it.
• 17:24
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's what I was saying. You're 19 in school.
• 17:27
  Speaker 5: I was just thinking of the time. I would think like, oh,
• 17:30
  Speaker 5: I need to go home to go take care of
• 17:32
  Speaker 5: my dog.
• 17:33
  Speaker 4: I would totally do that. Also- No update. No update.
• 17:38
  Speaker 4: No relevant comments. Nothing. But truly, I saw a comment
• 17:42
  Speaker 4: that was just like, oh, my pet likes you more? Here,
• 17:47
  Speaker 4: take my pet. Calling out the owner of the pet. So, yeah, whoever,
• 17:51
  Speaker 4: which is like they couldn't handle it. Crazy. Wild.
• 17:55
  Speaker 1: Vepos are crazy, though.
• 17:56
  Speaker 4: And that's the end of this story. We're going to
• 17:58
  Speaker 4: go on to the next one.
• 18:00
  Speaker 5: My roommate's mother demanded I follow her rules in the
• 18:04
  Speaker 5: apartment I pay for myself.
• 18:07
  Speaker 1: It's my apartment!
• 18:08
  Speaker 5: My roommate, who I'll call Emily, and I, both 21 female,
• 18:12
  Speaker 5: are college students, and we live in an off-campus apartment together.
• 18:16
  Speaker 5: We split rent and utilities 50-50. I pay for my part, myself,
• 18:20
  Speaker 5: but Emily's parents pay for hers. Emily's mom is a bit...
• 18:24
  Speaker 5: overbearing and has a lot of rules for our apartments
• 18:27
  Speaker 5: the main one being that no boyfriends are allowed to
• 18:30
  Speaker 5: sleep over as it's against her religion.
• 18:33
  Speaker 1: Well there you go it's her religion what religion i
• 18:37
  Speaker 1: mean a lot of religions doesn't allow sleepovers a lot
• 18:40
  Speaker 1: of religions do like sleepover yeah a lot of religions
• 18:43
  Speaker 1: are like not until you're married who knows what you
• 18:46
  Speaker 1: could be doing at that sleepover She.
• 18:49
  Speaker 5: Specifically told Emily to have a talk with me about
• 18:52
  Speaker 5: the subject to tell me this is not allowed after.
• 18:55
  Speaker 4: We moved in. That's crazy.
• 18:57
  Speaker 1: After you moved in?
• 18:59
  Speaker 5: Not how this works.
• 18:59
  Speaker 1: Where is it?
• 19:00
  Speaker 4: Where is it on the contract?
• 19:02
  Speaker 1: Oh, so she's saying she's saying you guys can't bring
• 19:04
  Speaker 1: your boyfriends over here because of my religion. So she
• 19:07
  Speaker 1: might be like she might be Muslim.
• 19:10
  Speaker 4: Emily can do that. I'm not following your religion.
• 19:13
  Speaker 1: Christian, I would think like, oh, you can't have your
• 19:16
  Speaker 1: own boyfriend sleep over. But with like a lot of,
• 19:19
  Speaker 1: you know, people who are devoutly. Why are you shaking
• 19:22
  Speaker 1: your head?
• 19:22
  Speaker 5: I see your point of view, but I've been around
• 19:24
  Speaker 5: some parents and they're super very overbearing. Emily doesn't care
• 19:30
  Speaker 5: if I have my boyfriend over for the night as
• 19:33
  Speaker 5: she does it all the time without telling her parents.
• 19:36
  Speaker 4: Hilarious. Amazing. Great.
• 19:38
  Speaker 5: However, it strikes me the wrong way that Emily's mom
• 19:41
  Speaker 5: feels like she can impose non-negotiable rules on me when
• 19:46
  Speaker 5: she doesn't pay for any of my part of the bills. Today,
• 19:49
  Speaker 5: Emily's parents are coming to visit and I expect her
• 19:52
  Speaker 5: mom to go over all the rules that she set
• 19:54
  Speaker 5: with me. Would I be the a-hole if I told
• 19:56
  Speaker 5: her mom that, with all due respect, I'm paying for
• 19:59
  Speaker 5: my portion of the rent and she doesn't have any
• 20:02
  Speaker 5: control of the things I do in my apartment? By
• 20:05
  Speaker 5: the way, this comes from Marshmallow Marshmallow of Doom and
• 20:08
  Speaker 5: And if you want to submit your own stories, go
• 20:09
  Speaker 5: to the r slash OK Storytime subreddit. I'm Riley.
• 20:11
  Speaker 1: I'm Sophia.
• 20:12
  Speaker 4: I'm Riley.
• 20:13
  Speaker 5: And we're going to read the story goofily. If you
• 20:15
  Speaker 5: have anything you'd like to add, please add it down below.
• 20:17
  Speaker 5: So before we continue, Sophia, would it be out of
• 20:20
  Speaker 5: Opie's bounds to say this to her mother?
• 20:22
  Speaker 1: I think you show her the lease. You go, it's funny.
• 20:25
  Speaker 1: It doesn't say anywhere that I can't have a boyfriend over. Yeah.
• 20:28
  Speaker 1: And then you take out your birth certificate and you go, huh,
• 20:30
  Speaker 1: you're not my mom.
• 20:31
  Speaker 4: And then she goes, the contract with God.
• 20:33
  Speaker 1: You go, I'm not religious.
• 20:35
  Speaker 4: It's a contract with your God.
• 20:37
  Speaker 5: On one hand, I feel like I'm justified. This woman
• 20:40
  Speaker 5: is trying to impose her own religious beliefs onto me
• 20:43
  Speaker 5: in an apartment that I pay half.
• 20:45
  Speaker 4: Of the bills for.
• 20:45
  Speaker 5: The idea of just rolling over and telling her that
• 20:49
  Speaker 5: I'll obey her demands when you Just doing my own
• 20:51
  Speaker 5: thing behind her back doesn't sit right with me. However,
• 20:54
  Speaker 5: after speaking to my own mother about the subject, he
• 20:57
  Speaker 5: thinks that it would be disrespectful. She says that even
• 20:59
  Speaker 5: though I am paying for my half of the rent,
• 21:02
  Speaker 5: Emily's family is still paying for this apartment and they
• 21:05
  Speaker 5: should be able to have a say on if what
• 21:07
  Speaker 5: goes on, even if Emily and I just end up
• 21:10
  Speaker 5: breaking those rules anyway. I've spoken to Emily about this subject,
• 21:13
  Speaker 5: and she doesn't care if I tell her mom that
• 21:15
  Speaker 5: I will or will not be following those rules as
• 21:18
  Speaker 5: long as I don't indicate that Emily breaks them.
• 21:20
  Speaker 1: I think you go in there and you go, Emily,
• 21:23
  Speaker 1: she's going to break them most of all. She has
• 21:26
  Speaker 1: a guy over every night, a different guy.
• 21:28
  Speaker 4: Hey, Emily, lay down on the floor for me. All right,
• 21:30
  Speaker 4: here comes a bus.
• 21:32
  Speaker 1: Throwing you under it.
• 21:33
  Speaker 5: So I was hoping to get some outside opinions here. Reddit,
• 21:37
  Speaker 5: what do you think? Would I be the a-hole if
• 21:38
  Speaker 5: I told my roommate's mom that I won't be following
• 21:41
  Speaker 5: her rules in my apartment? You will be the a-hole
• 21:44
  Speaker 5: if she enters the apartment and the second she enters,
• 21:47
  Speaker 5: you say this?
• 21:48
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 21:48
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you go, yeah, she's like, oh, hi, everyone. You go,
• 21:51
  Speaker 1: I will not follow your tyranny.
• 21:54
  Speaker 4: Rules are meant to be broken. Your gods do not
• 21:56
  Speaker 4: rule me here. What is a god to a non-believer?
• 21:59
  Speaker 2: Edit.
• 22:00
  Speaker 5: Thank you all for your input. Her parents stopped in briefly,
• 22:02
  Speaker 5: but then left to go get food. They'll be staying
• 22:04
  Speaker 5: here overnight, though, so I'm planning on updating this later
• 22:07
  Speaker 5: tonight to let everyone know what goes down when we
• 22:09
  Speaker 5: all do sit down and talk. I also just want
• 22:11
  Speaker 5: to say that after talking to Emily further about this,
• 22:14
  Speaker 5: it turns out that her dad doesn't really care what
• 22:16
  Speaker 5: I do and thinks that his wife's demands are extremely unreasonable.
• 22:20
  Speaker 5: This is why Emily doesn't care if I speak up
• 22:22
  Speaker 5: about it or not, because I guess that even though
• 22:24
  Speaker 5: her mom is paying the bills, it's her dad who
• 22:26
  Speaker 5: makes the money to support them all.
• 22:28
  Speaker 1: So her dad is paying the bills?
• 22:30
  Speaker 2: No.
• 22:31
  Speaker 5: No, no, no, no. Dad makes the money. The mom
• 22:34
  Speaker 5: writes the bills.
• 22:35
  Speaker 1: Yeah, she goes, okay, I signed something. He gave me
• 22:39
  Speaker 1: money and then I signed something. So I get to
• 22:42
  Speaker 1: have a say over everyone that lives in this apartment. Yeah,
• 22:45
  Speaker 1: that's definitely how it works.
• 22:48
  Speaker 5: Emily says that her dad would never make her move
• 22:51
  Speaker 5: just because her roommate doesn't follow traditional Christian values. And
• 22:55
  Speaker 5: even though her mom is a bit of a squeaky wheel,
• 22:58
  Speaker 5: her words, not mine, Her dad makes all of the
• 23:01
  Speaker 5: final decisions here.
• 23:02
  Speaker 4: Update.
• 23:03
  Speaker 1: Well, there you go. You don't have to worry about anything.
• 23:05
  Speaker 1: You just say, hey, I'm with dad here.
• 23:08
  Speaker 5: Yeah, I'm on daddy's side.
• 23:10
  Speaker 1: And then you look at the mom and go, traditionally,
• 23:12
  Speaker 1: you should be on whatever your husband says. And that's it. Update.
• 23:16
  Speaker 5: Thanks again for everyone's input, as well as one of
• 23:19
  Speaker 5: the awards. As of right now, nothing really has happened.
• 23:22
  Speaker 5: They're all in the living room watching movies, and I'm
• 23:24
  Speaker 5: just hanging out in my room. That being said, if
• 23:26
  Speaker 5: Emily's mother does say anything... I'm planning on still addressing
• 23:30
  Speaker 5: it in a respectful way while also making my boundaries clear.
• 23:34
  Speaker 5: I'll do another update tomorrow morning after they leave. Day two,
• 23:37
  Speaker 5: so they just left. I don't think she actually said anything.
• 23:41
  Speaker 4: You think Emily's mom brought it up?
• 23:43
  Speaker 2: No.
• 23:44
  Speaker 1: No, I don't think Emily's mom said anything.
• 23:46
  Speaker 5: How would you bring up an awkward conversation whenever you're
• 23:49
  Speaker 5: just having fun?
• 23:50
  Speaker 1: Like your daughter's 21-year-old roommate. I don't think they're talking
• 23:55
  Speaker 1: to her. I think they were just hoping that Emily
• 23:57
  Speaker 1: would tell them and everyone would be like, of course.
• 23:59
  Speaker 1: Of course we can do that.
• 24:01
  Speaker 5: Okay, so her parents just went home. So this will
• 24:03
  Speaker 5: be the final update. As I did expect, her.
• 24:06
  Speaker 4: Mom did bring up the rules. Called it.
• 24:09
  Speaker 5: But it didn't go in the way that I expected. First,
• 24:12
  Speaker 5: a little bit of background info about Emily's relationship with
• 24:15
  Speaker 5: her mom. They argue about politics a lot. I won't
• 24:18
  Speaker 5: go into specifics, but essentially, Emily is on one end
• 24:22
  Speaker 5: of the political spectrum, and her mom is the exact
• 24:26
  Speaker 5: opposite end. Her mom is also into a lot of
• 24:28
  Speaker 5: conspiracy theories, and this topic causes a lot of arguments
• 24:32
  Speaker 5: between the two.
• 24:32
  Speaker 4: Wait, now I know what I want to know. The
• 24:34
  Speaker 4: world's flat. I'll tell you exactly what they are. I
• 24:37
  Speaker 4: can tell you all.
• 24:38
  Speaker 5: They're the same ones I keep up with.
• 24:40
  Speaker 1: He's like, your roommates are satanic followers. And they're going
• 24:44
  Speaker 1: to drag you down into the pits of hell if
• 24:48
  Speaker 1: you have a boyfriend over.
• 24:50
  Speaker 5: I guess the entire time they were together yesterday, Emily
• 24:53
  Speaker 5: and her mom were arguing over politics. This morning I
• 24:57
  Speaker 5: went out of my bedroom. I overheard them arguing about
• 25:00
  Speaker 5: it again. They stopped when they saw me. I sat
• 25:03
  Speaker 5: down and was having a casual discussion with Emily and
• 25:05
  Speaker 5: her parents, and then her mom started saying something about
• 25:08
  Speaker 5: the vaccine.
• 25:09
  Speaker 4: Yes!
• 25:10
  Speaker 1: Ha ha ha ha!
• 25:11
  Speaker 4: They're gonna make you stop having babies.
• 25:13
  Speaker 5: Ooh, don't get the vaccine.
• 25:15
  Speaker 1: Like, you won't even have to worry about having a
• 25:17
  Speaker 1: boyfriend in the house, because you'll never have a family.
• 25:19
  Speaker 4: You'll be unalived by 22.
• 25:23
  Speaker 5: Emily just snapped at her mom and told her to
• 25:25
  Speaker 5: not bring up politics again. Emily's mom was quiet for
• 25:28
  Speaker 5: a minute, then she brought up the rules. Emily snapped
• 25:31
  Speaker 5: at her mom again and told her that she already
• 25:32
  Speaker 5: talked to me about it and just to drop it.
• 25:35
  Speaker 5: It wasn't brought up again.
• 25:36
  Speaker 4: And then that was that.
• 25:38
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it makes sense.
• 25:39
  Speaker 4: Dude, Emily's a real one.
• 25:40
  Speaker 1: Yeah, Emily said, okay, mom.
• 25:42
  Speaker 4: What was the dad doing in all of this?
• 25:44
  Speaker 5: Just eating his flapjacks.
• 25:47
  Speaker 4: And the mom went, what?
• 25:48
  Speaker 5: I bet the mom is just at home looking up
• 25:52
  Speaker 5: all that stuff.
• 25:52
  Speaker 1: Probably. She might be like a more traditional family. She,
• 25:56
  Speaker 1: you know, wife stays at home. and does all of
• 25:58
  Speaker 1: the back of house tasks, you know? And she has
• 26:02
  Speaker 1: all this time to just spend on the internet.
• 26:05
  Speaker 4: I just want to hear the mom's craziest conspiracy theory,
• 26:07
  Speaker 4: you know?
• 26:08
  Speaker 5: We all talked casually about school and work for a
• 26:11
  Speaker 5: little bit, and then they all packed up and left.
• 26:14
  Speaker 1: Well, there you go. Now only Emily has problems.
• 26:17
  Speaker 4: And then you get the, what is it, the stapler
• 26:21
  Speaker 4: or staples button that says, that was easy.
• 26:23
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you should go give her a hug. She had
• 26:26
  Speaker 1: a tough day.
• 26:28
  Speaker 5: The mom's a nut job. I have met some people
• 26:30
  Speaker 5: that handle this well and don't handle it well. You're
• 26:32
  Speaker 5: looking at someone that keeps up with these conspiracies, and
• 26:35
  Speaker 5: look how well I'm handling it.
• 26:36
  Speaker 1: Look at him. Look at him. He's dead in his eyes.
• 26:40
  Speaker 4: And that's the end of this story. We're going to
• 26:42
  Speaker 4: go on to the next one.
• 26:44
  Speaker 1: My roommate's boyfriend moved in without asking me, so I
• 26:47
  Speaker 1: want to report them.
• 26:48
  Speaker 4: That's not okay.
• 26:50
  Speaker 1: Before all of this started, my roommate, 25 female, and I,
• 26:53
  Speaker 1: 22 female, got along really well. similar interests hung out
• 26:57
  Speaker 1: etc over the last couple of months she started bringing
• 27:00
  Speaker 1: her boyfriend 19 male to our room to spend the
• 27:02
  Speaker 1: night it started as a few nights here and there
• 27:06
  Speaker 1: then it progressed to him essentially living here showering eating
• 27:10
  Speaker 1: getting ready in the mornings etc i kind of did
• 27:12
  Speaker 1: that i've done that but like so have all of
• 27:15
  Speaker 1: my boyfriend's roommates so it's fine Mind you, this is
• 27:20
  Speaker 1: a tiny room with only room for two beds, two dressers,
• 27:23
  Speaker 1: and a desk. For a while, I let it slide,
• 27:25
  Speaker 1: as I was often spending time outside the room. My
• 27:28
  Speaker 1: first mistake. And this is a shared room?
• 27:34
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 27:34
  Speaker 1: Which makes this a whole lot worse.
• 27:37
  Speaker 5: College dorm, I'm believing.
• 27:39
  Speaker 1: Also, okay, I'm not going to say it's like super weird,
• 27:42
  Speaker 1: but 25 and 19? Little weird.
• 27:45
  Speaker 5: He's 19, she's 25?
• 27:45
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah.
• 27:47
  Speaker 5: No, he's got game.
• 27:48
  Speaker 1: I guess so. As a 25-year-old, I would never, ever
• 27:53
  Speaker 1: want to date a 19-year-old. As time passed, I got
• 27:57
  Speaker 1: sick of it. I have exams to study for, need sleep.
• 28:01
  Speaker 1: He needs the TV to be on to sleep. And honestly,
• 28:04
  Speaker 1: just needs some dang privacy. I approached her a few
• 28:07
  Speaker 1: weeks back about it, explaining this to her. She caught
• 28:09
  Speaker 1: me off with, okay, fine, you don't need to explain.
• 28:12
  Speaker 1: I thought things were fine for a few days. Then
• 28:14
  Speaker 1: she started becoming really passive-aggressive. She threw away some of
• 28:17
  Speaker 1: my food, sat on her bed watching TV while I
• 28:20
  Speaker 1: unpacked a huge fridge in front of her, and brought
• 28:23
  Speaker 1: her boyfriend back to spend the night not even two
• 28:25
  Speaker 1: days after our conversation. So I confront her about this
• 28:29
  Speaker 1: the next day. She blew up at me, telling me
• 28:31
  Speaker 1: that I was a neurotic psycho, a witch, and that
• 28:34
  Speaker 1: if I didn't like it, I should quit. Quit what?
• 28:36
  Speaker 4: Quit what?
• 28:37
  Speaker 1: Quit living here?
• 28:38
  Speaker 4: I'm gonna stop sleeping. I'm gonna quit.
• 28:41
  Speaker 1: I tried my best to stay calm, but eventually tell
• 28:43
  Speaker 1: her that if it doesn't stop, I would report her.
• 28:46
  Speaker 5: Ooh, no, well, not really.
• 28:49
  Speaker 1: By the way, this comes from The Room Throw, and
• 28:51
  Speaker 1: if you want to submit your own stories, go to
• 28:52
  Speaker 1: the r slash showcase story time subreddit. I'm Sophia.
• 28:55
  Speaker 5: I'm Keon.
• 28:55
  Speaker 4: I'm Riley.
• 28:56
  Speaker 1: And we're here to give good advice goofily, but I
• 28:58
  Speaker 1: don't know what's going on anymore. Who is anyone?
• 29:01
  Speaker 4: I'm Sophia now.
• 29:02
  Speaker 1: Oh, let us know who everyone is in the comments.
• 29:05
  Speaker 4: We are Sophia. I am Sophia.
• 29:08
  Speaker 1: Sophia. Here's where things get a little complicated. We're all
• 29:11
  Speaker 1: in the military.
• 29:13
  Speaker 4: Oh, this makes so much more sense. Thank you for
• 29:16
  Speaker 4: your service.
• 29:17
  Speaker 1: Also, age difference makes more sense too. Reporting her for
• 29:20
  Speaker 1: having her boyfriend over and buying booze for him on
• 29:22
  Speaker 1: a regular basis could potentially end or seriously hinder both
• 29:26
  Speaker 1: their careers, especially her boyfriend he was recently under investigation.
• 29:31
  Speaker 4: For what?
• 29:32
  Speaker 1: So saying this spooks her. My roommate panics and starts
• 29:35
  Speaker 1: texting me after she leaves the room. saying that our
• 29:38
  Speaker 1: superiors wouldn't care.
• 29:39
  Speaker 4: Oh!
• 29:40
  Speaker 1: Oh, you want to test that?
• 29:41
  Speaker 2: Okay. Really?
• 29:42
  Speaker 4: Great, I'll tell them right now.
• 29:43
  Speaker 5: You know how hard it would be to frame that?
• 29:45
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 29:45
  Speaker 5: Not at all.
• 29:46
  Speaker 1: The next day she apologizes and says that it won't
• 29:48
  Speaker 1: happen again. I accept her apology and let it go.
• 29:51
  Speaker 1: For a while, things are good. But as of late,
• 29:54
  Speaker 1: he's been spending more and more time in my room again.
• 29:58
  Speaker 1: I have found two toothbrushes and men's bath soap in
• 30:01
  Speaker 1: my bathroom, hidden away in the back of our cabinet.
• 30:03
  Speaker 4: Some people like men's body washes, you know?
• 30:06
  Speaker 1: He brought his PS4 to our room and has it
• 30:08
  Speaker 1: hooked up to our shared TV.
• 30:09
  Speaker 4: Great, now you have a PS4. Yeah, you got a PS4.
• 30:11
  Speaker 2: Yay.
• 30:13
  Speaker 1: My roommate has stopped talking to me completely, ignoring my
• 30:16
  Speaker 1: questions or when I try to start a conversation. Her
• 30:19
  Speaker 1: boyfriend is annoying, but is a decent dude and still
• 30:22
  Speaker 1: tries to be friendly to me. I just don't know
• 30:30
  Speaker 1: what the right thing to do here is. Do I
• 30:32
  Speaker 1: just deal with it for the next few months and
• 30:34
  Speaker 1: put myself at risk for being complicit to underage drinking
• 30:37
  Speaker 1: if she gets caught? Do I report them and put
• 30:40
  Speaker 1: them both at risk for ruining their military careers? It
• 30:43
  Speaker 1: was just my roommate. I wouldn't hesitate to report her.
• 30:46
  Speaker 1: But her boyfriend is actually a decent person who I
• 30:49
  Speaker 1: think is just lovestruck. And we do have an update.
• 30:52
  Speaker 1: What do you do?
• 30:53
  Speaker 5: Can we change the logs?
• 30:55
  Speaker 1: Yeah, can we just log them out? Vote them out?
• 30:57
  Speaker 4: This is the second time this has happened now? Yeah,
• 31:00
  Speaker 4: where OP's confronted roommate and be like, you gotta stop this. Honestly,
• 31:04
  Speaker 4: I'm gonna be like, hey, I don't need to give
• 31:06
  Speaker 4: you a third chance. What are we doing?
• 31:08
  Speaker 5: Yeah, you could either frame him or talk to someone. Framing,
• 31:12
  Speaker 5: if it gets back to you're in a lot of trouble.
• 31:15
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't know. It does seem as though OP
• 31:19
  Speaker 1: is at least implying that she doesn't see him as often.
• 31:24
  Speaker 1: She just knows that he's there based off of clues.
• 31:29
  Speaker 1: But that could be not true. It just sounds like
• 31:31
  Speaker 1: he's not there as often.
• 31:32
  Speaker 5: He doesn't need to be living there, though. Yeah.
• 31:35
  Speaker 1: I don't know. The only thing that I'm considering, I'm like, oh,
• 31:38
  Speaker 1: is OP just already upset? And she's finding out clues
• 31:42
  Speaker 1: that he's just there at all?
• 31:43
  Speaker 5: There's mold in her room and it's making her aggravated.
• 31:46
  Speaker 1: And she's like, no, this mold. I hate the boyfriend.
• 31:48
  Speaker 1: And it's all this mold's fault. Yagaira says, talk to
• 31:51
  Speaker 1: the boyfriend. I mean, he seems like he's more, maybe
• 31:54
  Speaker 1: more receptive.
• 31:55
  Speaker 5: She's mature for his age.
• 31:56
  Speaker 4: Can she stay at your place more? Does he have
• 31:59
  Speaker 4: a place?
• 32:00
  Speaker 1: I mean, presumably if they're in the military, you get
• 32:03
  Speaker 1: like housing.
• 32:04
  Speaker 5: Probably got like a bunk.
• 32:06
  Speaker 1: He's probably just like has a, he either has like
• 32:09
  Speaker 1: a gross roommate or like a roommate that, or multiple
• 32:11
  Speaker 1: roommates even.
• 32:12
  Speaker 5: Boy roommate.
• 32:14
  Speaker 1: Update. So yesterday I finally worked up the courage to
• 32:17
  Speaker 1: talk to my superiors about the situation. I left out
• 32:21
  Speaker 1: all the incriminating details and essentially told them that He
• 32:25
  Speaker 1: was over all the time the things she had said
• 32:28
  Speaker 1: to me and that I wanted to move out. They
• 32:29
  Speaker 1: said they would call HQ and have something figured out
• 32:32
  Speaker 1: for me by the end of the day.
• 32:33
  Speaker 4: Hey, can we get a drone strike on this guy?
• 32:36
  Speaker 1: Can we just get rid of him?
• 32:37
  Speaker 4: Can we just get rid of him?
• 32:38
  Speaker 1: So I got called back in, and I'm told that
• 32:40
  Speaker 1: they'll be moving my roommate instead of me and switching
• 32:43
  Speaker 1: her out with my neighbor. Now, this is the last
• 32:46
  Speaker 1: thing I wanted as I'm inconveniencing two people.
• 32:49
  Speaker 4: I mean, they were inconveniencing you.
• 32:51
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean, you would probably be inconven- inconveniencing two
• 32:54
  Speaker 1: people regardless of whether or not it was you yeah
• 32:57
  Speaker 1: oh well i guess if she moved then she wouldn't
• 33:00
  Speaker 1: be inconveniencing inconveniencing.
• 33:02
  Speaker 5: Her roommate one other person.
• 33:03
  Speaker 1: Yeah she would just be swapping out with another person
• 33:05
  Speaker 1: three if you count my roommate's boyfriend i try to
• 33:08
  Speaker 1: talk with my superiors and make sure there were no
• 33:10
  Speaker 1: other options but they tell me no and to not
• 33:13
  Speaker 1: feel bad about the situation my neighbor was completely understanding
• 33:16
  Speaker 1: of the situation and and said that she wished I
• 33:18
  Speaker 1: had said something a long time ago. She's awesome.
• 33:21
  Speaker 4: Why don't you live with her?
• 33:22
  Speaker 1: Yeah. When I went back to my room after being released,
• 33:25
  Speaker 1: my roommate was there, and oh my god, did she
• 33:27
  Speaker 1: freak out. She starts screaming at me, calling me a witch. Fat. Pathetic.
• 33:33
  Speaker 1: Her boyfriend pipes in occasionally, repeating what she says. He goes,
• 33:37
  Speaker 1: you're a witch!
• 33:38
  Speaker 4: Yeah, witch!
• 33:39
  Speaker 1: Pathetic! Telling me I had everything handed to me because
• 33:42
  Speaker 1: I had my school paid for. I haven't even been
• 33:44
  Speaker 1: to college. I'd just tell her I could have made
• 33:46
  Speaker 1: the whole situation a lot worse, and I was willing
• 33:49
  Speaker 1: to be the one to move out. I leave it
• 33:51
  Speaker 1: at that and ignore everything else she says to me.
• 33:54
  Speaker 4: Rabbit hole.
• 33:55
  Speaker 5: Is it drinking, underage drinking, if your girlfriend, you're 19,
• 33:59
  Speaker 5: your girlfriend's 26, your girlfriend puts it in her mouth,
• 34:01
  Speaker 5: swallows a little bit, and then comes over to you
• 34:03
  Speaker 5: and kisses you, and then you get a little bit
• 34:05
  Speaker 5: of it?
• 34:05
  Speaker 4: Yeah, like mama bird it?
• 34:06
  Speaker 1: Just a little bit at a time.
• 34:08
  Speaker 4: Yes, Riley. Dang it.
• 34:10
  Speaker 5: Okay, well, there's no loophole for this guy to get
• 34:12
  Speaker 5: out of drinking.
• 34:14
  Speaker 1: I normally I'd be like, oh, you know, I think
• 34:17
  Speaker 1: it's good that OP didn't wrap them out for the
• 34:20
  Speaker 1: drinking stuff because it's like, oh, you didn't have to
• 34:22
  Speaker 1: do that. But now I'm like, they kind of suck.
• 34:25
  Speaker 4: Might as well.
• 34:25
  Speaker 5: I've been seeing a lot of drinks around. He seems
• 34:28
  Speaker 5: kind of wobbly at night.
• 34:29
  Speaker 1: You go, oh, I'm a witch. Oh, well, seems like
• 34:32
  Speaker 1: you're doing something illegal.
• 34:34
  Speaker 4: Who's providing some little drinkies to the child over there, huh?
• 34:38
  Speaker 1: Sounds like that's a little illegal.
• 34:40
  Speaker 5: I would.
• 34:41
  Speaker 4: Yeah. At that point.
• 34:42
  Speaker 1: We finally get her all moved out, and as my
• 34:44
  Speaker 1: neighbor is moving in, we help her clean. It was disgusting.
• 34:48
  Speaker 1: Vomit behind the bed? Sticky brown stuff on the walls, crumbs,
• 34:52
  Speaker 1: and more of the brown stuff in her drawers. It
• 34:55
  Speaker 1: really explains a lot of the smell. We spent two
• 34:58
  Speaker 1: hours doing that, but all is well now. My new
• 35:01
  Speaker 1: roommate is awesome. My old roommate now is stuck with
• 35:03
  Speaker 1: a girl she absolutely hates. who also has a boyfriend
• 35:06
  Speaker 1: who sleeps there, who's a heck of a lot more
• 35:09
  Speaker 1: vocal than me and not afraid to call her out
• 35:11
  Speaker 1: on her BS. My old roommate's boyfriend is constantly glaring
• 35:15
  Speaker 1: at me, but whatever. I don't feel bad for them.
• 35:17
  Speaker 1: I feel bad for making my new roommate move, but
• 35:19
  Speaker 1: I'm proud of myself for doing what was best for
• 35:21
  Speaker 1: me for once.
• 35:22
  Speaker 5: She didn't want to be there anyways.
• 35:24
  Speaker 4: Yeah, they're upset at you for them breaking the rules.
• 35:27
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's so stupid. But now they have to deal
• 35:30
  Speaker 1: with a person who's doing the exact same thing as them.
• 35:32
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 35:33
  Speaker 3: Oh, dude.
• 35:34
  Speaker 5: The person that set that up is totally smiling right now.
• 35:37
  Speaker 1: I'm a little bit confused because OP is saying, oh,
• 35:38
  Speaker 1: it was really gross. Whose area were they cleaning?
• 35:42
  Speaker 4: The roommates. The old roommates.
• 35:44
  Speaker 1: Whose old roommate?
• 35:45
  Speaker 5: So you have OP and then Brittany. Brittany moved out
• 35:48
  Speaker 5: and Cassie moved in. But as Cassie was moving in,
• 35:51
  Speaker 5: they saw all of Brittany's mess in her corner.
• 35:53
  Speaker 1: The one who moved in with Opie's ex-remate?
• 35:56
  Speaker 5: Yeah, so Cassie was with Dana.
• 36:00
  Speaker 4: Cassie and Dana.
• 36:01
  Speaker 5: So Brittany moved in with Dana. And now Cassie moved in.
• 36:04
  Speaker 5: And then they were cleaning up Brittany's mess.
• 36:05
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's gross. That's crazy.
• 36:07
  Speaker 3: Too off.
• 36:08
  Speaker 1: But that's the end of that story.
• 36:09
  Speaker 5: Ew, vomit?
• 36:11
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's like, how do you, I don't know, if I,
• 36:13
  Speaker 1: because you can smell that. NLP said, oh yeah, explains
• 36:16
  Speaker 1: the smell, but like, to a point where I'm, like, I'm,
• 36:19
  Speaker 1: that's a biohazard and I'm calling, if you can call
• 36:21
  Speaker 1: the superiors and they'll move you into a new room,
• 36:26
  Speaker 1: you could have definitely been like, hey, my roommate, there's
• 36:28
  Speaker 1: like a foul smell in my room.
• 36:30
  Speaker 4: There's an unknown liquid or sticky liquid all over the place.
• 36:35
  Speaker 5: It must have not been that close if you couldn't
• 36:37
  Speaker 5: smell that. Weird, weird, weird, weird.
• 36:40
  Speaker 4: And that's the end of this story. We're gonna go
• 36:43
  Speaker 4: on to the next one.
• 36:44
  Speaker 2: Hey, it's Carly, your favorite axolotl host here. We're going
• 36:49
  Speaker 2: to get back to the stories, but here's three minutes
• 36:51
  Speaker 2: of ads from our sponsors.
• 36:53
  Speaker 5: I discovered hurtful messages between my boyfriend and his brother
• 36:58
  Speaker 5: talking about me. Uh-oh, that's not good. I, 23 female,
• 37:02
  Speaker 5: will try to make this as short as possible. I'm
• 37:06
  Speaker 5: taking summer courses and my laptop just broke. I asked
• 37:09
  Speaker 5: my boyfriend, Andy, 23 male, to borrow his overnight so
• 37:14
  Speaker 5: I could finish a paper. He gladly said yes. As
• 37:17
  Speaker 5: I was procrastinating with Reddit in one window, the tab
• 37:20
  Speaker 5: at the top started indicating that there was a new
• 37:23
  Speaker 5: Facebook message. Not even realizing that actually Andy was logged
• 37:27
  Speaker 5: into Facebook, I clicked on the tab instantly and realized that, oops,
• 37:32
  Speaker 5: this wasn't mine when I saw the message was from
• 37:35
  Speaker 5: his brother, 27 male-ish.
• 37:38
  Speaker 4: I didn't cut and.
• 37:39
  Speaker 5: Paste it, but basically the message said, dude, where's the
• 37:42
  Speaker 5: horse teeth at?
• 37:43
  Speaker 4: You're up late.
• 37:45
  Speaker 5: I have terrible teeth, yes. Not a secret. So obviously
• 37:50
  Speaker 5: this was about me. Putting that in my back pocket, though.
• 37:53
  Speaker 4: Take a picture. Yeah, it's not good.
• 37:56
  Speaker 3: Oh, man.
• 37:56
  Speaker 1: Your own boyfriend and brother talking about your teeth.
• 37:59
  Speaker 2: Oh.
• 38:00
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 38:00
  Speaker 5: There are some prominent features on people's faces in my family,
• 38:04
  Speaker 5: and we do name them after that.
• 38:06
  Speaker 2: Oh.
• 38:08
  Speaker 4: It's bad. Well, that's not good, right?
• 38:09
  Speaker 1: Like what? Give us one.
• 38:10
  Speaker 4: Let's not.
• 38:11
  Speaker 5: I can't do it right here. I did not answer,
• 38:14
  Speaker 5: but my curiosity got the better of me. and I
• 38:17
  Speaker 5: scrolled through their conversation. While there were lots of positive
• 38:20
  Speaker 5: things Andy said about me, she's amazing. She's very fun.
• 38:24
  Speaker 5: I would never cheat on her no matter what. Brother
• 38:26
  Speaker 5: was pitching pretty hard to have Andy hook up with
• 38:29
  Speaker 5: the girl from his work. Lots of compliments about my
• 38:32
  Speaker 5: rock climbing. He also called me things like No F * * *
• 38:35
  Speaker 5: s McGee, Rat's Nest Hair, and Avocado Nose.
• 38:38
  Speaker 4: Oh, we got multiple names. Wow.
• 38:41
  Speaker 1: What does Avocado Nose mean? Oh, like it's like... Wait, like, ooh?
• 38:46
  Speaker 4: Yes.
• 38:47
  Speaker 1: Oh, that's so rude.
• 38:49
  Speaker 4: I mean.
• 38:50
  Speaker 5: It's like the one nose you never pick when making
• 38:53
  Speaker 5: your me on the Wii.
• 38:57
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 38:58
  Speaker 5: He also went through a long conversation sort of at
• 39:02
  Speaker 5: his brother's urging that I am far from the prettiest
• 39:05
  Speaker 5: girl he's ever dated. And sometimes he misses the dumb,
• 39:09
  Speaker 5: big boobed types. He dated in high school.
• 39:12
  Speaker 4: What is going on? By the way, this comes from.
• 39:14
  Speaker 5: Very Sad Right Now, 1, 2, 3, and a few
• 39:16
  Speaker 5: of us may own stories.
• 39:18
  Speaker 4: You know where to go. I'm Riley. I'm Keon.
• 39:21
  Speaker 1: And I'm Savannah.
• 39:22
  Speaker 4: And we're going to make Very Sad, 123 very happy
• 39:26
  Speaker 4: with our funny jokes and humor. If you have anything
• 39:29
  Speaker 4: you'd like to add, please add it down below. If
• 39:31
  Speaker 4: you saw this from your partner.
• 39:33
  Speaker 5: If my partner called me McGee, I'd be pissed.
• 39:37
  Speaker 4: I'm a solid A cup.
• 39:39
  Speaker 1: Oh, wait.
• 39:42
  Speaker 4: Oh, my God.
• 39:42
  Speaker 1: Somebody did this to me. My like XXX whatever in
• 39:46
  Speaker 1: high school. Oh, my God. His friends used to call
• 39:48
  Speaker 1: me tree trunks. And you want to know why?
• 39:51
  Speaker 4: Because you had big ankles?
• 39:52
  Speaker 3: No, ginormous thighs. They used to call me tree trunks
• 39:55
  Speaker 3: because my thighs were huge.
• 39:57
  Speaker 4: Okay. Let me say something about women's thighs. It doesn't
• 40:00
  Speaker 4: matter how big they are. They are beautiful. That is
• 40:03
  Speaker 4: like the best part.
• 40:04
  Speaker 5: Yeah, honestly.
• 40:05
  Speaker 4: How about wings? Like triceps?
• 40:07
  Speaker 1: Sure.
• 40:09
  Speaker 4: A girl with some triceps?
• 40:11
  Speaker 3: Okay. Wings.
• 40:12
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that could.
• 40:13
  Speaker 4: I could be down.
• 40:14
  Speaker 5: She could do some pull-ups and stuff. I was attracted
• 40:16
  Speaker 5: to a girl with tricep once.
• 40:17
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 40:18
  Speaker 4: Ugh. I don't even know. Back to my original question.
• 40:22
  Speaker 4: If you saw your partner talking about you like this,
• 40:24
  Speaker 4: is this an immediate breakup?
• 40:26
  Speaker 5: We said a lot of nice things, though.
• 40:27
  Speaker 1: Do they outweigh bad?
• 40:29
  Speaker 4: I heard three bad things and ten good things. I
• 40:33
  Speaker 4: think they even out.
• 40:33
  Speaker 1: So, no, no, no.
• 40:36
  Speaker 5: They even out.
• 40:37
  Speaker 4: Oh, no.
• 40:37
  Speaker 1: You shouldn't be talking bad things in the first place.
• 40:39
  Speaker 4: So mic drop.
• 40:40
  Speaker 5: Here's the thing. I know I'm not the best looking girl.
• 40:43
  Speaker 5: I wish I was, but I've come to terms with
• 40:46
  Speaker 5: my appearance. Well, at least I really thought I had
• 40:49
  Speaker 5: until last night, but I really love Andy. And it's
• 40:52
  Speaker 5: not like it's first puppy dog love either because I've
• 40:55
  Speaker 5: had boyfriends and been in love before. And this feels
• 40:59
  Speaker 5: very different. I don't know if I should or even
• 41:01
  Speaker 5: could get over this, but I want to because nothing
• 41:04
  Speaker 5: he has said was untrue. I have no chest, my
• 41:07
  Speaker 5: nose is too big for my face, and I spend
• 41:09
  Speaker 5: all my spare time outside, so my hair is most
• 41:12
  Speaker 5: of the time a mess.
• 41:14
  Speaker 4: Oh, Pete, no.
• 41:15
  Speaker 3: Yeah, don't be looking for reasons to, like, confirm what
• 41:19
  Speaker 3: he's saying.
• 41:21
  Speaker 1: He's rude, and he should not be saying any of that.
• 41:23
  Speaker 4: You're beautiful. I dated a guy whose friend called me
• 41:26
  Speaker 4: a butterface.
• 41:28
  Speaker 1: Oh, yeah, everything butterface. Yeah. I've heard that before.
• 41:33
  Speaker 3: I don't think I have been called, not that I
• 41:35
  Speaker 3: know of, but I have heard that term.
• 41:38
  Speaker 5: And it was a private conversation I was never supposed
• 41:41
  Speaker 5: to see. But it still hurts that Andy does not
• 41:43
  Speaker 5: see me as even attractive compared to his other girlfriends.
• 41:47
  Speaker 4: How do I approach this? Or even should I?
• 41:50
  Speaker 5: I know he would feel horrible if he found out
• 41:52
  Speaker 5: I knew about this. I don't want to do that,
• 41:55
  Speaker 5: but I feel like I need to clear the air somehow.
• 41:58
  Speaker 4: How should I? I'm confronting. Yeah?
• 42:01
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 42:01
  Speaker 4: Oh, you're going to feel bad about confronting your boyfriend
• 42:04
  Speaker 4: who's not stopping these name callings with his brother? Confronting this.
• 42:09
  Speaker 4: That's crazy. I have to. Yeah, I know. Because you
• 42:11
  Speaker 4: keep thinking about it. Every time you see him or
• 42:13
  Speaker 4: you see his brother.
• 42:14
  Speaker 1: Exactly. That's how I feel, too.
• 42:17
  Speaker 4: Or start making up names for the brother. Get a
• 42:20
  Speaker 4: little bit more personal. Start using those names that he
• 42:23
  Speaker 4: used for you. And like, what's up, Crow's Nest or whatever.
• 42:27
  Speaker 5: McGee.
• 42:28
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 42:28
  Speaker 4: What's up, tree trunks?
• 42:29
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 42:30
  Speaker 1: What's up?
• 42:31
  Speaker 4: What's up, guy who's obsessed with his brother's exes?
• 42:33
  Speaker 5: Yeah, I mean, this is locker room talk these brothers
• 42:36
  Speaker 5: are doing. I never engage in locker room talk.
• 42:39
  Speaker 2: I just.
• 42:40
  Speaker 1: As you shouldn't. It's just like.
• 42:43
  Speaker 4: I don't know.
• 42:43
  Speaker 5: Like, I've been in scenarios where guys are like, oh, yeah,
• 42:45
  Speaker 5: I took this girl and I blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
• 42:46
  Speaker 5: And I'm like.
• 42:48
  Speaker 4: OK, it's.
• 42:49
  Speaker 1: Just it makes me look down on you.
• 42:51
  Speaker 3: If you're not going to tell me like then you're
• 42:53
  Speaker 3: not being your true self because you're around your true
• 42:56
  Speaker 3: self around your like man, your friends. But then you
• 42:59
  Speaker 3: can't be your true self around me because you would
• 43:01
  Speaker 3: never say that about me.
• 43:02
  Speaker 4: If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say it.
• 43:05
  Speaker 4: If you're trying to be your true self, how are
• 43:07
  Speaker 4: you supposed to keep it all in? Yeah, you know
• 43:08
  Speaker 4: who that is? Myself. Update.
• 43:10
  Speaker 5: I took most of the advice here and broke up
• 43:12
  Speaker 5: with Andy. Oh, I didn't even think about that option.
• 43:16
  Speaker 5: I thought she was just going to stay with him.
• 43:18
  Speaker 4: You mean my hypothetical at the very beginning that I asked?
• 43:21
  Speaker 5: I can't even see straight. I'm so brokenhearted and crying
• 43:24
  Speaker 5: so hard. He was very apologetic and he said he
• 43:28
  Speaker 5: didn't mean any of it. But the person who said
• 43:30
  Speaker 5: can't unring a bell is what kept going through my head.
• 43:34
  Speaker 5: I can't even begin to describe how sad I am
• 43:37
  Speaker 5: right now. I always kept my fair distance from guys,
• 43:41
  Speaker 5: keeping school, climbing, I'm a semi-pro outdoor sports climber, and
• 43:46
  Speaker 5: my community garden as a comfortable pad between getting hurt
• 43:50
  Speaker 5: too bad. But I'm smitten with Andy, everything about me,
• 43:53
  Speaker 5: and my self-protective side I turned off because my heart
• 43:57
  Speaker 5: skips a beat when he's around me. I'm crushed. I'm
• 44:00
  Speaker 5: broken over this. I know things will be better in time,
• 44:04
  Speaker 5: but Mein Gott.
• 44:06
  Speaker 4: Mein Gott. I'm sick right now. They're German. That's just
• 44:09
  Speaker 4: got to be German. Can you look up German Mein Gott? Oh, yes,
• 44:11
  Speaker 4: I can. Can you look up German?
• 44:13
  Speaker 1: Mein Gott means my God or oh my God.
• 44:17
  Speaker 4: Mein Gott. Mein Gott. Mein Gott. Mein Gott.
• 44:22
  Speaker 3: Wow.
• 44:23
  Speaker 4: She's already sad. She's already sad.
• 44:26
  Speaker 5: She can't see straight because she's heartbroken and crying. It's
• 44:29
  Speaker 5: hard to type when you can't see.
• 44:30
  Speaker 4: Darn.
• 44:31
  Speaker 5: You would know that.
• 44:32
  Speaker 4: It doesn't help, I will admit. OP, you deserve better,
• 44:37
  Speaker 4: you know? You'll find someone who... Better or the best? Well,
• 44:41
  Speaker 4: OP's the best. And that's the end of this story.
• 44:44
  Speaker 4: We're gonna go on to the next one.
• 44:46
  Speaker 1: The man I kissed already had a girlfriend who just
• 44:48
  Speaker 1: gave birth yesterday.
• 44:50
  Speaker 4: That's really messed up.
• 44:51
  Speaker 1: I was at a festival Friday in my home city
• 44:54
  Speaker 1: and ran into an old friend. We used to be
• 44:56
  Speaker 1: in the same friend group and hung out, but lost touch.
• 44:58
  Speaker 1: I haven't seen him for seven years. I drifted away
• 45:02
  Speaker 1: from that group because most of them were closer to
• 45:04
  Speaker 1: my ex. Friday night, we kissed. Like, really kissed.
• 45:09
  Speaker 4: Just like that?
• 45:10
  Speaker 1: Just like that.
• 45:11
  Speaker 4: No, no, like, oh, we meet up. It was just like... Hey, Kiss.
• 45:15
  Speaker 1: Kiss. We went away from the crowd and there was
• 45:17
  Speaker 1: some grabbing. Ooh. And he confessed that he had always
• 45:21
  Speaker 1: been very attracted to me. I went home and didn't
• 45:23
  Speaker 1: think much of it. Like, it was fun and he's
• 45:26
  Speaker 1: good looking, but I didn't really feel super excited about him.
• 45:29
  Speaker 1: I had no plan to do anything more with it. Saturday,
• 45:31
  Speaker 1: I was also at the festival, but I didn't see him. Today, Sunday,
• 45:35
  Speaker 1: I looked him up on Facebook. We're still Facebook friends
• 45:37
  Speaker 1: and I was shocked and to see that he has
• 45:40
  Speaker 1: a girlfriend who had posted that she had given birth yesterday, Saturday,
• 45:45
  Speaker 1: just one day after the kiss. And it's their second child.
• 45:49
  Speaker 4: What's he doing out and about?
• 45:51
  Speaker 1: Yeah, like, why is he at a festival? Are they divorced?
• 45:55
  Speaker 1: Why is he at a festival? I know her too,
• 45:57
  Speaker 1: as it's the same girl that he was dating back then.
• 46:00
  Speaker 3: Ooh.
• 46:01
  Speaker 4: He's like, seven years have gone by. She doesn't remember
• 46:03
  Speaker 4: a thing.
• 46:04
  Speaker 1: By the way, this comes from Last Puppy in the Box.
• 46:06
  Speaker 1: And if you want to submit your own stories, go
• 46:07
  Speaker 1: to the r slash showcase story time subreddit. I'm Sophia.
• 46:10
  Speaker 4: I'm Kion.
• 46:11
  Speaker 1: And I'm Savannah. We're here to give good advice goofily,
• 46:14
  Speaker 1: but we don't have all the answers. We only know
• 46:16
  Speaker 1: what we'd do. So let us know what you would
• 46:17
  Speaker 1: do in the comments. And Opie says, I liked her
• 46:20
  Speaker 1: very much. I have gone over it in my head
• 46:22
  Speaker 1: about what to do. I, of course, have zero interest
• 46:25
  Speaker 1: in him. I didn't really before, but after knowing this,
• 46:29
  Speaker 1: I find him absolutely disgusting. I feel disgusted with myself too,
• 46:33
  Speaker 1: but I do blame him more because I had no
• 46:35
  Speaker 1: idea he was still with her. I mean, yeah.
• 46:37
  Speaker 4: You're not to blame. You didn't do anything wrong.
• 46:39
  Speaker 1: Nothing.
• 46:40
  Speaker 4: It Yeah.
• 46:41
  Speaker 1: And definitely not that she was about to give birth
• 46:43
  Speaker 1: the next day. After thinking a lot, I have decided
• 46:46
  Speaker 1: not to tell his girlfriend. My reasoning is that she
• 46:50
  Speaker 1: literally just gave birth, they have small children, and I
• 46:52
  Speaker 1: don't want to be the person who drops this on
• 46:54
  Speaker 1: her right now.
• 46:55
  Speaker 4: I think that is.
• 46:57
  Speaker 1: I get the she just gave birth, let's give her
• 47:00
  Speaker 1: a minute. I probably would message her in like two weeks.
• 47:04
  Speaker 4: Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 47:04
  Speaker 1: You know, I'd be like, she literally just gave birth.
• 47:07
  Speaker 4: I think Opie's going to do that. I think Opie's
• 47:08
  Speaker 4: going to be like, hey, let me just, she just
• 47:11
  Speaker 4: gave birth. Let's just.
• 47:12
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I wouldn't tell her right now, but I do
• 47:16
  Speaker 1: think you should tell her.
• 47:17
  Speaker 4: You should probably message the guy and be like, hey,
• 47:19
  Speaker 4: what's that about? You just have a new kid. What's
• 47:23
  Speaker 4: that about?
• 47:24
  Speaker 1: Yeah, congratulations on your kid. I also do not want
• 47:27
  Speaker 1: to be seen as someone who helped ruin a family,
• 47:29
  Speaker 1: even though I know he is the one who chose
• 47:31
  Speaker 1: to cheat, but I just don't want my name on this.
• 47:33
  Speaker 1: Message her anonymously. In two weeks. Part of me thinks
• 47:37
  Speaker 1: that if he is capable of doing this while his
• 47:38
  Speaker 1: girlfriend was about to have their child, he will probably
• 47:41
  Speaker 1: give her other reasons to reevaluate their relationship later when
• 47:45
  Speaker 1: she has more capacity to deal with it. But I
• 47:47
  Speaker 1: also feel like maybe she deserves to know. And maybe
• 47:50
  Speaker 1: I'm only making excuses to protect my own relationship. And
• 47:53
  Speaker 1: because I don't want to deal with it. Am I
• 47:55
  Speaker 1: the a-hole for not telling this girl that I kissed
• 47:57
  Speaker 1: her boyfriend? And we've got an update. But what do
• 48:01
  Speaker 1: you think? I think.
• 48:03
  Speaker 4: Put yourself in her shoes.
• 48:04
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 48:05
  Speaker 1: If you're the pregnant girlfriend, wouldn't you want to know?
• 48:08
  Speaker 4: Probably not ASAP.
• 48:09
  Speaker 2: Rocky?
• 48:09
  Speaker 1: Yeah, give me a minute. I still think two weeks.
• 48:12
  Speaker 4: I agree. What do you guys.
• 48:14
  Speaker 1: Do you think.
• 48:14
  Speaker 4: Do you guys.
• 48:15
  Speaker 1: think don't tell her at all tell her right now
• 48:19
  Speaker 1: or tell her in like some you know wait after
• 48:21
  Speaker 1: some waiting period.
• 48:23
  Speaker 4: Like a month at the most yeah.
• 48:24
  Speaker 3: Me personally i would tell her now because i know
• 48:28
  Speaker 3: in like a week or two one i'm either gonna
• 48:30
  Speaker 3: forget about it and two i'm just not i'm gonna
• 48:35
  Speaker 3: talk myself out of it if i.
• 48:36
  Speaker 1: Don't yeah she might just convince her oh well now
• 48:39
  Speaker 1: it's been too yeah it's been a while you know.
• 48:41
  Speaker 4: Who cares it's been a while.
• 48:43
  Speaker 1: It's been a while Um, I see that.
• 48:46
  Speaker 4: If he can do that with you. Yeah. Imagine if
• 48:49
  Speaker 4: he could do that with anybody else. Yeah.
• 48:51
  Speaker 1: If he's kissing random girl from his past at a festival,
• 48:54
  Speaker 1: he's absolutely cheating on her with other people.
• 48:57
  Speaker 4: Well, without, without a doubt. Yeah.
• 48:59
  Speaker 1: But we got an update. I can see a lot
• 49:01
  Speaker 1: of people think I should tell her or at least
• 49:02
  Speaker 1: tell her later when she's not freshly postpartum. However, I
• 49:06
  Speaker 1: still don't think I want to do that. Girly pop.
• 49:08
  Speaker 1: Come on.
• 49:08
  Speaker 4: Come on.
• 49:09
  Speaker 2: O.P.
• 49:10
  Speaker 1: Instead, I decided to call my ex for some context.
• 49:13
  Speaker 1: He knew her back then, too, and apparently still does
• 49:15
  Speaker 1: because they played sport together for a while.
• 49:17
  Speaker 4: Sport. Sport.
• 49:19
  Speaker 1: They played sport together.
• 49:20
  Speaker 4: Come here, sport.
• 49:22
  Speaker 1: And he still sees both of them. Ooh, maybe he
• 49:25
  Speaker 1: can do the telling. Him and I ended things on
• 49:28
  Speaker 1: good terms, so it wasn't weird to call him. I
• 49:31
  Speaker 1: told him what happened, and he told me there had
• 49:33
  Speaker 1: been a lot of drama in their relationship for years,
• 49:36
  Speaker 1: and that this is not the first time for him. Also,
• 49:39
  Speaker 1: not the worst thing he has done. According to my ex,
• 49:41
  Speaker 1: he has cheated on her multiple times, and not just kissing.
• 49:45
  Speaker 1: He even had a full relationship on the side at
• 49:47
  Speaker 1: one point. where he had promised the other girl that
• 49:50
  Speaker 1: he would leave his girlfriend for her, but he never did.
• 49:53
  Speaker 4: Oh, wow. I mean, I did call it as I
• 49:54
  Speaker 4: sees it, but wow.
• 49:55
  Speaker 1: Why is your ex still friends with these people? We've
• 49:59
  Speaker 1: got a little bit left. Any final thoughts?
• 50:01
  Speaker 4: What a s * * *. Yeah, very s * * *.
• 50:04
  Speaker 4: Why are they still together? I don't know. What is
• 50:07
  Speaker 4: going on?
• 50:08
  Speaker 1: I don't know why they're still together. It feels like
• 50:10
  Speaker 1: maybe she's... You know, she thinks that she's stuck because
• 50:13
  Speaker 1: she's got two kids now.
• 50:15
  Speaker 4: Honestly, good thing you texted your ex to get more
• 50:18
  Speaker 4: context before you did this.
• 50:21
  Speaker 1: I still think you should tell her. There is less,
• 50:25
  Speaker 1: I think, pressing need to tell her now that we
• 50:29
  Speaker 1: know this information because she's stayed before, you know, but
• 50:34
  Speaker 1: I still think you should tell her.
• 50:36
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 50:37
  Speaker 1: She knows about some of his cheating, maybe not the
• 50:39
  Speaker 1: full extent of everything, but she knows about the side
• 50:42
  Speaker 1: girl and a few other incidents. My ex said she
• 50:45
  Speaker 1: has taken him back every time and forgiven him. Girl. Yeah,
• 50:50
  Speaker 1: now it's on her. You're just an idiot.
• 50:52
  Speaker 4: Yeah, you can just tell her, but if it's happened
• 50:54
  Speaker 4: multiple times, it's not going to do a thing.
• 50:56
  Speaker 3: She had two kids with the guy. I don't think
• 50:58
  Speaker 3: she really cares. And also the fact that it's not
• 51:01
  Speaker 3: just one incident. It's been a few. She don't care.
• 51:04
  Speaker 1: Her excuse, according to him, is that they met young
• 51:07
  Speaker 1: and it was just a rocky path and that he
• 51:08
  Speaker 1: did choose her in the end. And he's the one
• 51:11
  Speaker 1: she wants to be with for her life.
• 51:13
  Speaker 4: Why?
• 51:13
  Speaker 1: Although they still haven't gotten married or even engaged. Yeah,
• 51:17
  Speaker 1: I doubt he'll ever marry her. He also said that
• 51:19
  Speaker 1: she might not know he is doing this right now,
• 51:21
  Speaker 1: but she should know his character by now. He also
• 51:24
  Speaker 1: warned me that this guy can become very unpleasant. Probably
• 51:27
  Speaker 1: not dangerous or anything, but definitely unpleasant. So his advice
• 51:31
  Speaker 1: was to just not get involved in this. I know
• 51:34
  Speaker 1: some people will still think I should tell her, and
• 51:37
  Speaker 1: I understand that. I just don't think it's worth it
• 51:39
  Speaker 1: for me. At least now my ex knows, and he
• 51:41
  Speaker 1: does see them sometimes. I don't think he's going to
• 51:44
  Speaker 1: say anything if nothing more happens. But maybe in the future,
• 51:47
  Speaker 1: if the guy decides to cheat again, he will. Then
• 51:51
  Speaker 1: he might bring it up. So you're just leaving alone
• 51:54
  Speaker 1: to be someone else's problem.
• 51:56
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 51:57
  Speaker 1: I don't like this.
• 51:57
  Speaker 4: This is a gross predicament.
• 51:59
  Speaker 1: Kind of like, I don't know, your ex kind of sucks.
• 52:02
  Speaker 1: You suck less for not telling now that we know
• 52:06
  Speaker 1: this context.
• 52:07
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 52:07
  Speaker 1: I still think you should tell, but I understand safety concerns.
• 52:11
  Speaker 4: But, like, is it going to... Would it do anything?
• 52:14
  Speaker 4: Will it do a thing? No.
• 52:17
  Speaker 3: Probably not.
• 52:17
  Speaker 4: Unfortunately not. I don't know. That sounds like just a very,
• 52:22
  Speaker 4: very gross predicament. I'm sorry, OP. I'm more sorry for
• 52:25
  Speaker 4: the girl.
• 52:26
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 52:27
  Speaker 1: But she's also, like, she's staying here. She's staying there.
• 52:30
  Speaker 1: She knows.
• 52:31
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 52:32
  Speaker 3: Truthfully, now it's up to the girl if she wants
• 52:35
  Speaker 3: to make the decision. You can tell her anything, but.
• 52:37
  Speaker 1: She wouldn't listen.
• 52:38
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 52:38
  Speaker 1: They got to make the decision for themselves.
• 52:40
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 52:40
  Speaker 1: But that's the end of that story.
• 52:43
  Speaker 4: My boyfriend gets upset over inoffensive things that I say.
• 52:46
  Speaker 4: I'm getting tired of it. Girl, I would too. I,
• 52:49
  Speaker 4: 28 female, am presently on a walk trying to blow
• 52:52
  Speaker 4: off steam. You're a choo-choo train. My boyfriend, 28 male,
• 52:55
  Speaker 4: has a habit of getting offended by something I say.
• 52:57
  Speaker 4: Last week, I said, my friend Sam wants to hang
• 53:00
  Speaker 4: out with us soon. He wants to get to know
• 53:02
  Speaker 4: you better. He's a good guy. Because of this, we
• 53:04
  Speaker 4: had a day-long fight about it because he said, I
• 53:07
  Speaker 4: went on and on about how about Sam is a
• 53:10
  Speaker 4: great guy after we had spicy sleep. It had been
• 53:12
  Speaker 4: 20 minutes or so, but we were in bed just talking,
• 53:15
  Speaker 4: and that made me upset. So, LP says, we had
• 53:18
  Speaker 4: a day of fighting where he accused me of not
• 53:20
  Speaker 4: being sensitive enough, and I accused him of reading too
• 53:23
  Speaker 4: much into a single sentence. This is not the first
• 53:26
  Speaker 4: time it's happened. We have been dating for eight months,
• 53:28
  Speaker 4: and we were long distance for a while, and had
• 53:31
  Speaker 4: maybe five fights in that time, in the span of
• 53:33
  Speaker 4: six months. That's not healthy. The last two months, we've
• 53:36
  Speaker 4: lived together. I'm in another country, and he came here
• 53:39
  Speaker 4: to live with me. Last night, he was talking about
• 53:41
  Speaker 4: when he goes back to his home country, he'll have
• 53:43
  Speaker 4: to find a place, etc., and doesn't know if he'll
• 53:46
  Speaker 4: find temporary housing. I suggested him getting an apartment and
• 53:49
  Speaker 4: breaking his lease. I've had to do this before, and
• 53:51
  Speaker 4: will do this next year, as a matter of the fact.
• 53:54
  Speaker 4: It sucks, but that's how crap works, and we just
• 53:56
  Speaker 4: gotta put up with it. This has turned into another
• 53:58
  Speaker 4: day of us fighting, with him accusing me of taking
• 54:02
  Speaker 4: him for granted. Taking his job flexibility for granted. He
• 54:06
  Speaker 4: can work anywhere. And not caring enough, not being sensitive enough,
• 54:09
  Speaker 4: you name it. OP, you guys have been dating for
• 54:13
  Speaker 4: eight months. Break up. Listen, man, he's hot.
• 54:16
  Speaker 5: Come on.
• 54:17
  Speaker 4: Don't care. Think about it.
• 54:18
  Speaker 5: He's a 10, but he overthinks everything you say.
• 54:21
  Speaker 4: Down to a 5. That one sentence apparently had a
• 54:24
  Speaker 4: lot of meaning to him when I was just trying
• 54:26
  Speaker 4: to offer up suggestions. I explained my side, I listened
• 54:29
  Speaker 4: to him, I agreed with him on some points, and
• 54:32
  Speaker 4: I apologized. He continued to go on about how I
• 54:35
  Speaker 4: don't appreciate him. By the way, this comes from user QueenOfAshes.
• 54:39
  Speaker 4: And if you want to submit your own stories, go
• 54:40
  Speaker 4: to the r slash OKStoryTime subreddit. I'm Keon.
• 54:42
  Speaker 5: I'm Riley.
• 54:43
  Speaker 1: And I'm Savannah.
• 54:45
  Speaker 4: And we're here to give good advice goofily. We don't
• 54:47
  Speaker 4: know everything. We only know what we'd do. So let
• 54:49
  Speaker 4: us know what you'd do in the comments down below.
• 54:51
  Speaker 4: Pretty please. As Opie says, this is a theme in
• 54:54
  Speaker 4: our fights. I say something wrong. He gets upset. He
• 54:58
  Speaker 4: insults me without calling me a bad girlfriend outright. Gets
• 55:02
  Speaker 4: mad that I get upset. Then says he can't tell
• 55:04
  Speaker 4: me how he feels and how it's always his fault
• 55:06
  Speaker 4: and paints himself the victim. Oh, my head hurts. The
• 55:11
  Speaker 4: fact that you have like a pattern to your arguments
• 55:14
  Speaker 4: and there's a theme to it. It's not even been
• 55:16
  Speaker 4: a year. My head hurts. Opie continues saying, I'm livid.
• 55:24
  Speaker 4: I've done so much for him and have been nothing
• 55:26
  Speaker 4: but grateful. He has moved here for me. I've never
• 55:29
  Speaker 4: asked him to. He wanted to. And he wants to
• 55:32
  Speaker 4: come back in a few more months when his tourist
• 55:34
  Speaker 4: visa is up. He's always been the one saying he
• 55:36
  Speaker 4: has the money. His job is flexible. He wants to
• 55:39
  Speaker 4: be here. Now he accuses me of putting pressure on him?
• 55:42
  Speaker 4: Because of that one single sentence? I need insight. I
• 55:47
  Speaker 4: need perspective. I need advice. Please help. And that's what
• 55:52
  Speaker 4: we're going to do.
• 55:52
  Speaker 5: So when you date a man with high intelligence, sometimes
• 55:56
  Speaker 5: it's hard to connect with him on an intellectual thing.
• 55:59
  Speaker 5: So usually when you say just simple words without precise meaning,
• 56:04
  Speaker 5: it can turn into an argument. Thus, Opie, you're the a-hole.
• 56:08
  Speaker 5: And don't blame me for being so smart. I'm not.
• 56:11
  Speaker 5: I'm not the bad guy here. I'm just a victim
• 56:13
  Speaker 5: to your stupidity.
• 56:14
  Speaker 4: This guy is a modern day Socrates. Um, easy. I'll
• 56:19
  Speaker 4: tell you everything you need to do right now, OP.
• 56:21
  Speaker 4: Two words. Break up. Expand your vocabulary. Holy crap, no.
• 56:25
  Speaker 4: Break up. Oh, sorry.
• 56:26
  Speaker 1: That was three words.
• 56:27
  Speaker 4: Expand your lexicon. That's still three words.
• 56:30
  Speaker 1: And what is lexicon? All right.
• 56:32
  Speaker 4: Lexicon.
• 56:33
  Speaker 5: So lexicon is the library of words that you know.
• 56:37
  Speaker 1: Break up.
• 56:37
  Speaker 4: Easy break up.
• 56:39
  Speaker 5: Maybe do flip the argument and you do that to him.
• 56:42
  Speaker 4: I don't know. He takes it. I just need to
• 56:44
  Speaker 4: see a photo of this guy. How hot is he? Update.
• 56:47
  Speaker 1: It always comes back to that.
• 56:49
  Speaker 4: Update. Well, Reddit, we broke up. No. What? Two weeks
• 56:55
  Speaker 4: after I posted the above, we got into another fight.
• 56:58
  Speaker 2: Really?
• 56:58
  Speaker 4: Wow. Because I was surprised to see him in the
• 57:01
  Speaker 4: kitchen when I just saw him in the bedroom. I said, oh,
• 57:05
  Speaker 4: you're up. He responded by rolling his eyes. shrugging his
• 57:09
  Speaker 4: shoulders and demanding, is that a problem? Did we hear
• 57:13
  Speaker 4: her tone of voice and how she said it? I
• 57:16
  Speaker 4: don't think we did. I want to throw something at you.
• 57:19
  Speaker 4: I said, of course not. I was just surprised. And
• 57:23
  Speaker 4: then he went on to do the laundry. He left
• 57:25
  Speaker 4: the kitchen and went into the bedroom. He gave me
• 57:27
  Speaker 4: one word answers when I tried talking to him. I
• 57:30
  Speaker 4: guess he needed time to himself. So I went to
• 57:32
  Speaker 4: the living room to call my friend. As I was
• 57:35
  Speaker 4: talking to her, I heard him leave the apartment. After
• 57:37
  Speaker 4: I finished talking to her about 20 minutes later, I
• 57:40
  Speaker 4: went out to find him playing Pokemon Go. Dude, you
• 57:42
  Speaker 4: did that today? I did that today, yes. I caught
• 57:44
  Speaker 4: a shiny.
• 57:45
  Speaker 1: Ooh, what kind?
• 57:47
  Speaker 4: My egg hatched. It was a 10K egg, and it
• 57:50
  Speaker 4: was a shiny Bouffalant. Thanks, Pokemon Go. I tried talking
• 57:54
  Speaker 4: to him like normal, and he kept giving me one-word answers,
• 57:57
  Speaker 4: not looking at me. Of course he's not looking at you.
• 57:59
  Speaker 4: He's trying to get an excellent throw on Pokemon Go. Also,
• 58:02
  Speaker 4: you should have watched your tone earlier. I finally asked him,
• 58:06
  Speaker 4: what was wrong? And he said... Nothing. Oh my God.
• 58:11
  Speaker 1: Like, if you're going to call me out, tell me
• 58:14
  Speaker 1: what happened. Like, you have to back it up.
• 58:17
  Speaker 4: I said to just tell me. He said he didn't
• 58:19
  Speaker 4: feel welcome in my apartment because of my tone. Oh,
• 58:23
  Speaker 4: Riley Wilson.
• 58:24
  Speaker 1: Woman doctor right there.
• 58:26
  Speaker 4: For listeners who heard the previous fights, you'll know my
• 58:29
  Speaker 4: tone and the wordings of my sentences were things that
• 58:33
  Speaker 4: triggered him a lot.
• 58:35
  Speaker 5: I mean, it did.
• 58:36
  Speaker 4: He couldn't talk. He's speechless. Even if they were innocent
• 58:39
  Speaker 4: statements like, I thought you were traveling on Monday. Or
• 58:41
  Speaker 4: anything else that somehow threatened him and made him immediately defensive.
• 58:45
  Speaker 4: Threatened you?
• 58:46
  Speaker 5: You think, oh, you're leaving on Monday?
• 58:49
  Speaker 4: I cannot let you get close. Oh, you're up in
• 58:52
  Speaker 4: the kitchen. How do you, how's that threat? I feel
• 58:56
  Speaker 4: like you ask him, hey, how's your day?
• 58:58
  Speaker 1: Oh my God.
• 58:59
  Speaker 4: You're asking me how my day is? How dare you?
• 59:03
  Speaker 4: Don't even look at me.
• 59:04
  Speaker 5: As you can see, everything OP asked him, he's looking
• 59:07
  Speaker 5: at it through the perspective of.
• 59:10
  Speaker 4: annoyance or he's getting defensive or.
• 59:13
  Speaker 5: That like it's he's in survival mode yeah and he's
• 59:16
  Speaker 5: just saying whatever to keep himself afloat and it's it's
• 59:19
  Speaker 5: in it's in here something's Like, some screw's not tightened
• 59:25
  Speaker 5: in there.
• 59:25
  Speaker 4: You go, hi. And he goes, oh my gosh. Why
• 59:28
  Speaker 4: do you say hi, not hello? How rude.
• 59:31
  Speaker 5: Yeah, hello is a more formal thing.
• 59:33
  Speaker 4: Hi is like. It's a good point. Unlike other times
• 59:36
  Speaker 4: where we would launch into a fight that would last
• 59:39
  Speaker 4: hours or days because he would insist I would have
• 59:43
  Speaker 4: a tone. I would say I didn't mean it that way.
• 59:45
  Speaker 4: I would apologize. And it wasn't enough. This time, we
• 59:49
  Speaker 4: managed to pass through it fairly unscathed.
• 59:52
  Speaker 2: And.
• 59:53
  Speaker 4: Due mostly to my patience, if I may say. But
• 59:55
  Speaker 4: then later that day, he told me how annoying my
• 59:58
  Speaker 4: indecision was. That I could never relax. That night, I
• 1:00:03
  Speaker 4: wanted to see some friends for a few hours because
• 1:00:05
  Speaker 4: I had only interacted with him for several weeks at
• 1:00:07
  Speaker 4: that point, and I needed some social time. He said
• 1:00:11
  Speaker 4: that was fine. He's always said that would be fine,
• 1:00:14
  Speaker 4: as if I needed permission from him. So I went out.
• 1:00:17
  Speaker 4: 25 minutes away from home and nearly at my destination,
• 1:00:20
  Speaker 4: he messages me about how he feels.
• 1:00:23
  Speaker 5: Yeah, he probably does because you're his only friend.
• 1:00:26
  Speaker 4: That he's going back to his home country soon. He
• 1:00:28
  Speaker 4: wishes I hadn't gone out. That we don't have much
• 1:00:31
  Speaker 4: time left together and we were supposed to spend the
• 1:00:33
  Speaker 4: whole day together. This was news to me. And how
• 1:00:37
  Speaker 4: dare you?
• 1:00:38
  Speaker 5: You're the a-hole because you should have.
• 1:00:40
  Speaker 4: You should have thought about this stuff. Our listeners are
• 1:00:42
  Speaker 4: going to get triggered by your nonsense. Well, I'm sorry,
• 1:00:46
  Speaker 4: OP's inconsiderate. It takes a lot of effort for me
• 1:00:48
  Speaker 4: to keep down the anxiety and just enjoy time with
• 1:00:51
  Speaker 4: my friends before going home. We argue for two hours
• 1:00:54
  Speaker 4: about it, even though there are several times when I
• 1:00:57
  Speaker 4: point out he's repeating himself, that he said he didn't
• 1:01:01
  Speaker 4: even know he would feel that way, so how could
• 1:01:03
  Speaker 4: I anticipate his needs? OP, you have to read his mind. Duh.
• 1:01:10
  Speaker 4: Like a book. It occurred to me that he often
• 1:01:12
  Speaker 4: would do that, wait until it was too late to
• 1:01:15
  Speaker 4: change something, complain about it, and make it my fault.
• 1:01:19
  Speaker 4: Like when he accused me of leaving him alone to
• 1:01:21
  Speaker 4: fend for himself at a party for an hour. It
• 1:01:24
  Speaker 4: was 15 minutes. I was watching the clock knowing he
• 1:01:27
  Speaker 4: was insecure and didn't like social gatherings. Or that I
• 1:01:31
  Speaker 4: was with my friend he didn't like the whole time.
• 1:01:33
  Speaker 4: I talked to my friend for less than five minutes
• 1:01:35
  Speaker 4: the whole night because I had one eye on the
• 1:01:37
  Speaker 4: clock and the other on my boyfriend. Why didn't he
• 1:01:40
  Speaker 4: get up and talk to me during the party and
• 1:01:42
  Speaker 4: tell me that? Why did he wait until the party
• 1:01:44
  Speaker 4: was over and we were home and he held it
• 1:01:46
  Speaker 4: over my head? Oh, this seems like an isolation tactic.
• 1:01:50
  Speaker 4: This is toxic. Or the time we got back from
• 1:01:54
  Speaker 4: a tropical island and he says, I wish we could
• 1:01:56
  Speaker 4: have relaxed more.
• 1:01:57
  Speaker 1: Oh, oh!
• 1:02:00
  Speaker 4: And fun note, I was the one who planned the
• 1:02:03
  Speaker 4: trip and was driving. And why did it occur to
• 1:02:05
  Speaker 4: him to tell me that at any time he just
• 1:02:08
  Speaker 4: wanted to relax somewhere else? I thought it was relaxing
• 1:02:10
  Speaker 4: because he was just in the car talking with me
• 1:02:13
  Speaker 4: and playing Pokemon Go anyway while I was doing the driving.
• 1:02:17
  Speaker 4: Was it really not that relaxing? Or that time he
• 1:02:20
  Speaker 4: was mad at me all day because he thought I
• 1:02:22
  Speaker 4: was mad at him and I had made some remark
• 1:02:24
  Speaker 4: that he took personally. Shock. And he didn't tell me
• 1:02:27
  Speaker 4: why he was being quiet until hours later and after
• 1:02:30
  Speaker 4: I pried and begged him for him to just tell
• 1:02:32
  Speaker 4: me what was going on. You've been doing this for
• 1:02:34
  Speaker 4: how many months? Eight months? Nine months?
• 1:02:37
  Speaker 5: Every day you spend with this man, a little piece
• 1:02:39
  Speaker 5: of your sanity goes away.
• 1:02:41
  Speaker 4: Again, I need to see how hot he is.
• 1:02:43
  Speaker 3: No, this is like, truthfully... I went through this. So like,
• 1:02:47
  Speaker 3: I completely understand. And it's like kind of triggering because
• 1:02:50
  Speaker 3: it's like, what else can I possibly do? Like nothing,
• 1:02:53
  Speaker 3: nothing can satisfy this person. No matter if I talk,
• 1:02:56
  Speaker 3: I say the wrong thing. I don't talk.
• 1:02:58
  Speaker 1: It's wrong. You should have said something like, I don't
• 1:03:00
  Speaker 1: breathe the right way. Why are you breathing like that?
• 1:03:02
  Speaker 1: Oh my God. I don't know what you want. I literally,
• 1:03:06
  Speaker 1: and I went insane.
• 1:03:08
  Speaker 4: This is the kind of crap. All the time, you guys.
• 1:03:11
  Speaker 4: Holy crap.
• 1:03:13
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:03:13
  Speaker 4: The day of the reckoning. He finally leaves my country.
• 1:03:16
  Speaker 4: He's back in his home country. It mentions to me
• 1:03:18
  Speaker 4: how he feels like he failed us and doesn't want
• 1:03:21
  Speaker 4: to be home. I respond compassionately, but say he needs
• 1:03:24
  Speaker 4: to get rest because he's been traveling so long and
• 1:03:27
  Speaker 4: hasn't eaten. And I wanted to give the discussion of
• 1:03:30
  Speaker 4: his feelings the time and love they needed. And we
• 1:03:32
  Speaker 4: couldn't when it was 3 a.m.
• 1:03:34
  Speaker 2: There.
• 1:03:34
  Speaker 4: And he had to be up for work at 7 a.m.
• 1:03:36
  Speaker 4: Oh no, he's going to take that and be really upset.
• 1:03:40
  Speaker 4: You told him how to feel.
• 1:03:41
  Speaker 5: I don't get why guys get like this.
• 1:03:44
  Speaker 1: I'm going to blame it on upbringing.
• 1:03:45
  Speaker 4: He goes cold. He goes to bed, he wakes up,
• 1:03:48
  Speaker 4: and he's still cold. One word answers, uh-oh. It's repeating itself.
• 1:03:55
  Speaker 4: I'm used to it now. But now, I'm just fed up.
• 1:03:59
  Speaker 4: I call him out on his behavior. I tell him
• 1:04:01
  Speaker 4: I'm sick of him going hot and cold with me.
• 1:04:04
  Speaker 4: He says I didn't comfort him the way he wanted
• 1:04:07
  Speaker 4: me to.
• 1:04:07
  Speaker 1: Of course, it's your fault.
• 1:04:09
  Speaker 5: Yeah, well, honestly, it's your fault, dude, because you didn't
• 1:04:12
  Speaker 5: write me out of SOP with how to respond to you.
• 1:04:15
  Speaker 4: I just say I'm no longer comforting you. If I
• 1:04:18
  Speaker 4: can't comfort you anymore, no one can. Bye.
• 1:04:21
  Speaker 1: When have you ever comforted me?
• 1:04:23
  Speaker 4: Obi continues saying I reiterate what I had said. He
• 1:04:27
  Speaker 4: reiterates that it's not what he wanted to hear. Well,
• 1:04:31
  Speaker 4: we break up later that day. Yeah, we're both sad.
• 1:04:35
  Speaker 4: Despite the bad times, we did have good times, too. Otherwise,
• 1:04:38
  Speaker 4: it would have been easier to let go. I'm disappointed
• 1:04:41
  Speaker 4: in myself for saying I still didn't recognize the emotional mistreatment.
• 1:04:44
  Speaker 4: I said we could try again. He says we couldn't.
• 1:04:48
  Speaker 4: We both cry and we both apologize. We both thank
• 1:04:51
  Speaker 4: each other for the good times. And now to the
• 1:04:53
  Speaker 4: next morning. Wait, can I guess? Sure.
• 1:04:56
  Speaker 1: He's going to be mean. He's going to be like, actually,
• 1:04:58
  Speaker 1: this is all your fault. And then and then and
• 1:05:00
  Speaker 1: then and then.
• 1:05:01
  Speaker 4: No, I guarantee he's going to play the victim card.
• 1:05:02
  Speaker 4: He's going to be like, it's my fault. And you
• 1:05:05
  Speaker 4: know what? I could have done better. We'll see. Riley,
• 1:05:08
  Speaker 4: any ideas? He's going to try and win you back. So,
• 1:05:11
  Speaker 4: next morning, he wakes up.
• 1:05:14
  Speaker 2: Pissed.
• 1:05:15
  Speaker 1: Told you. Told you.
• 1:05:16
  Speaker 4: Oh no, he pee-peed the bed.
• 1:05:17
  Speaker 2: Oh.
• 1:05:18
  Speaker 1: Told you.
• 1:05:19
  Speaker 4: He's mad I didn't give him a chance.
• 1:05:21
  Speaker 3: Yep.
• 1:05:22
  Speaker 4: Mad he has nothing to show for our relationship. Mad
• 1:05:24
  Speaker 4: at all the sacrifices he made. Side note, after the
• 1:05:27
  Speaker 4: last fight I posted about... He had said this to me.
• 1:05:30
  Speaker 4: I look at all the sacrifices I've made and I wonder,
• 1:05:33
  Speaker 4: what have you sacrificed? Are you worth it? That's to
• 1:05:36
  Speaker 4: give you an idea. That is the most hurtful thing
• 1:05:39
  Speaker 4: anyone has ever said to me. And it was the
• 1:05:41
  Speaker 4: beginning of the end of our relationship. I opened up
• 1:05:44
  Speaker 4: my home to him. Cooked him vegetarian meals. Tried to
• 1:05:48
  Speaker 4: introduce him to other people so he didn't feel lonely.
• 1:05:50
  Speaker 4: Took him out and explored the country with him. Tried
• 1:05:53
  Speaker 4: to cheer him up. Planned all of our trips. It
• 1:05:55
  Speaker 4: was never enough. What was I sacrificing? My time. My energy.
• 1:06:01
  Speaker 4: My mental health. My personal freedom. My social time with
• 1:06:05
  Speaker 4: my friends. I sacrificed everything. Yep, I.
• 1:06:11
  Speaker 5: I know this type of guy. I got everything I
• 1:06:13
  Speaker 5: need to know about him.
• 1:06:14
  Speaker 4: Yikes.
• 1:06:15
  Speaker 1: I know this man. I know this man.
• 1:06:19
  Speaker 5: I don't know. As a dude, it's your responsibility to
• 1:06:22
  Speaker 5: go out there and make friends and connect with people.
• 1:06:25
  Speaker 4: Your girlfriend can help. I will say this. Yeah, a
• 1:06:28
  Speaker 4: lot of people are introverts, but I've never had any
• 1:06:32
  Speaker 4: problems making friends with guys. I would say 90% of
• 1:06:34
  Speaker 4: the time. The other 10% of the time, they don't
• 1:06:37
  Speaker 4: like me for whatever reason or they don't want to
• 1:06:39
  Speaker 4: talk to me or have the energy. But when I
• 1:06:42
  Speaker 4: met Riley, he was one of those guys. 90% or 10%?
• 1:06:44
  Speaker 4: Do you remember? I think it was 90%. You were
• 1:06:47
  Speaker 4: in the 90%. It's very easy. Keone's so cool. Oh,
• 1:06:51
  Speaker 4: my God. It's very easy to make friends with guys.
• 1:06:54
  Speaker 4: It's just like, hey, one thing you guys can have
• 1:06:56
  Speaker 4: the same mutual interest on, boom.
• 1:06:58
  Speaker 5: You're good.
• 1:06:59
  Speaker 4: You're so good.
• 1:07:00
  Speaker 3: Wish that was easy for my ex. He had friends,
• 1:07:03
  Speaker 3: and then I came into the picture. They were mean
• 1:07:05
  Speaker 3: to me one day, and so he cut them off.
• 1:07:06
  Speaker 3: I didn't even say anything. I was like, okay, if
• 1:07:08
  Speaker 3: that's what you think, like, you know, whatever. Cut them
• 1:07:10
  Speaker 3: off and then blame me later that he didn't have
• 1:07:11
  Speaker 3: any friends because of me.
• 1:07:12
  Speaker 1: And I went, okay.
• 1:07:13
  Speaker 4: All right.
• 1:07:15
  Speaker 1: You're right. It was me. I forgot. I ruined your life.
• 1:07:18
  Speaker 1: But you're still with me, right? Apparently I do something
• 1:07:21
  Speaker 1: you like.
• 1:07:21
  Speaker 4: It was like he always expected the worst of me
• 1:07:23
  Speaker 4: and would only ever see what he wanted to see.
• 1:07:26
  Speaker 4: A little bit left here. OP, you know this is
• 1:07:29
  Speaker 4: not good for you. The fact that you wake up
• 1:07:32
  Speaker 4: every day or like every little thing could give you
• 1:07:36
  Speaker 4: a headache because he's just going to start saying you
• 1:07:40
  Speaker 4: weren't enough or you didn't do this or how dare
• 1:07:42
  Speaker 4: you talk to me in that tone. It's exhausting. How
• 1:07:44
  Speaker 4: are you not exhausted by now?
• 1:07:46
  Speaker 5: She is.
• 1:07:46
  Speaker 4: It took her nine months, eight months. She's breaking up
• 1:07:49
  Speaker 4: with him.
• 1:07:49
  Speaker 5: Goodness gracious. I can only imagine how light you feel
• 1:07:53
  Speaker 5: being done with this guy.
• 1:07:54
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 1:07:56
  Speaker 5: I remember when I broke up with my ex, dude.
• 1:07:58
  Speaker 5: Two weeks after, I was like, wow, I'm like, ooh.
• 1:08:01
  Speaker 4: No weight on my shoulders.
• 1:08:02
  Speaker 2: Wow.
• 1:08:02
  Speaker 4: I don't feel stressed. What is that? All the expectations
• 1:08:05
  Speaker 4: are gone. I don't have anxiety anymore, yeah.
• 1:08:07
  Speaker 5: So nice.
• 1:08:08
  Speaker 1: I can breathe. I can breathe again.
• 1:08:10
  Speaker 4: Exactly.
• 1:08:10
  Speaker 1: I'm not doing anything wrong for a day?
• 1:08:12
  Speaker 4: That's weird. Crazy. There's a little bit left. Let's go
• 1:08:14
  Speaker 4: ahead and finish it up. So, we haven't talked since.
• 1:08:17
  Speaker 4: And after he chewed me up and spit me out
• 1:08:20
  Speaker 4: and accused me of never listening to his feelings and
• 1:08:23
  Speaker 4: always blaming him for everything. That I should have told
• 1:08:25
  Speaker 4: him how I felt sooner. That I should have heard
• 1:08:28
  Speaker 4: him out and on an apology that He apparently had
• 1:08:31
  Speaker 4: no intention to actually get better from, just to feel
• 1:08:34
  Speaker 4: bad that it happened at all and repeat the same
• 1:08:36
  Speaker 4: behaviors as an infinitum. I won't lie, I miss who
• 1:08:40
  Speaker 4: he was in the beginning. The sweet guy. The promises.
• 1:08:44
  Speaker 4: The love. The care. The above and beyond romantic gestures.
• 1:08:48
  Speaker 4: But they, they vanished only months into the relationship, after
• 1:08:51
  Speaker 4: we exchanged a I love you's, and that's when the
• 1:08:54
  Speaker 4: jealousy came out. The insecurity, nitpicking what I said and
• 1:08:58
  Speaker 4: how I said it, even how I apologized. wasn't good
• 1:09:01
  Speaker 4: enough for him his controlling tendencies he demanded i not
• 1:09:05
  Speaker 4: talk to my friends about it even after the breakup
• 1:09:07
  Speaker 4: he asked that i not talk to our mutual friends
• 1:09:09
  Speaker 4: about our breakup i could never make him happy.
• 1:09:12
  Speaker 5: That's crazy is this kind of my act word for
• 1:09:15
  Speaker 5: word huh yeah it's weird thanks He.
• 1:09:18
  Speaker 1: Got mad when I would talk about him to anyone.
• 1:09:21
  Speaker 3: And I'm like, well, I don't know. I need advice
• 1:09:22
  Speaker 3: on what to do because I can't come to you
• 1:09:24
  Speaker 3: because you're crazy.
• 1:09:26
  Speaker 2: Yikes.
• 1:09:26
  Speaker 3: And then he'd be like, stop telling your sisters because
• 1:09:28
  Speaker 3: then they look at me bad. Well, don't do bad things.
• 1:09:30
  Speaker 4: I don't know. Of course I want to tell my sisters.
• 1:09:32
  Speaker 1: Are you an idiot?
• 1:09:32
  Speaker 2: All right.
• 1:09:32
  Speaker 1: All right. All right.
• 1:09:34
  Speaker 4: I'm glad we're done with this episode. Dang, that was
• 1:09:36
  Speaker 4: just so much trauma.
• 1:09:38
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:09:38
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 1:09:38
  Speaker 4: That's crazy. I was just reading that story. I don't
• 1:09:41
  Speaker 4: know what's going on there.
• 1:09:41
  Speaker 5: It was just one thing after another and another and another.
• 1:09:44
  Speaker 5: I'm really sorry about that. You were... In that Savannah,
• 1:09:48
  Speaker 5: but I'm really happy you're out of it.
• 1:09:49
  Speaker 4: Look at you now. And that's the end of this story.
• 1:09:57
  Speaker 4: We're good to go on to the next one.
• 1:09:59
  Speaker 1: Hey, it's Angie, your favorite fashion host here.
• 1:10:02
  Speaker 3: We're going to get back to the stories, but here's
• 1:10:04
  Speaker 3: three minutes of ads from our sponsors.
• 1:10:07
  Speaker 4: My girlfriend wants to pay for an expensive vacation for
• 1:10:09
  Speaker 4: the both of us. I'm uncomfortable.
• 1:10:12
  Speaker 1: What's uncomfortable about money?
• 1:10:15
  Speaker 4: Some relevant background information. I, 29 male, make a very
• 1:10:19
  Speaker 4: good living myself and earn slightly over six figures and
• 1:10:23
  Speaker 4: come from a basic middle class family. Dang. That's what
• 1:10:26
  Speaker 4: we're calling it now? Yeah, what?
• 1:10:28
  Speaker 1: I make six figures and come from middle class.
• 1:10:31
  Speaker 3: Okay.
• 1:10:32
  Speaker 4: Maybe he came from a middle class family and then
• 1:10:34
  Speaker 4: got a good job.
• 1:10:35
  Speaker 1: And then made six figures.
• 1:10:37
  Speaker 4: I live a comfortable life and manage my money wisely.
• 1:10:40
  Speaker 4: My girlfriend, 25 female, of eight months, comes from a
• 1:10:43
  Speaker 4: very rich family like... The 1% rich. Dang. Salary-wise, she
• 1:10:50
  Speaker 4: makes less than half of what I make, but receives
• 1:10:52
  Speaker 4: an allowance from her family's business every month. She doesn't
• 1:10:55
  Speaker 4: even touch her salary and says that it gets accumulated
• 1:10:58
  Speaker 4: into her savings account. She lives off of her monthly
• 1:11:01
  Speaker 4: allowance from her family business. Relationship-wise, we are very compatible
• 1:11:05
  Speaker 4: so far. I really like her and she likes me.
• 1:11:08
  Speaker 4: I would hope you figured that out eight months in.
• 1:11:10
  Speaker 1: Yeah, for real. What was that?
• 1:11:12
  Speaker 4: She told me about her family's wealth about four months
• 1:11:14
  Speaker 4: into the relationship when she felt safe and comfortable with me.
• 1:11:18
  Speaker 4: Up until now, we split all our expenses and dates 50-50. Recently,
• 1:11:22
  Speaker 4: we talked about going on a vacation and we decided
• 1:11:24
  Speaker 4: on Western Europe since I've never been there and I
• 1:11:28
  Speaker 4: think vacations are a good test of relationships and help
• 1:11:31
  Speaker 4: move the relationship forward. I can afford the trip on
• 1:11:33
  Speaker 4: my own if we go the normal route where we
• 1:11:37
  Speaker 4: book economy tickets to fly and look for an Airbnb
• 1:11:40
  Speaker 4: or hotel deals, you know. That stuff.
• 1:11:42
  Speaker 1: That's the cheap way of... That's how I do it.
• 1:11:46
  Speaker 1: What do you mean? What's the.
• 1:11:47
  Speaker 4: Well, wait.
• 1:11:48
  Speaker 1: No, he said the normal way.
• 1:11:49
  Speaker 4: Sorry.
• 1:11:50
  Speaker 1: I put cheap in his mouth. It's normal.
• 1:11:52
  Speaker 4: My bad. That's normal.
• 1:11:53
  Speaker 1: That is the normal way to do it.
• 1:11:55
  Speaker 4: She wants to fly first class and stay in four
• 1:11:57
  Speaker 4: to five star hotels.
• 1:11:58
  Speaker 1: Ooh, I mean, she can afford it, so why not?
• 1:12:00
  Speaker 4: Does Opie want to do that? Opie probably can afford
• 1:12:02
  Speaker 4: it too, but he wants to go the normal route.
• 1:12:05
  Speaker 1: Does he want to go the normal route? Or he
• 1:12:07
  Speaker 1: just said, like, this would be the normal route. But
• 1:12:10
  Speaker 1: she wants to do this.
• 1:12:10
  Speaker 4: He said, I can afford the trip on my own
• 1:12:12
  Speaker 4: if we go the normal route.
• 1:12:14
  Speaker 1: Mmm, okay.
• 1:12:15
  Speaker 4: Alright, we're starting off a little different taste here. One
• 1:12:20
  Speaker 4: wants to go the normal route, one wants to go
• 1:12:22
  Speaker 4: the pricier route. By the way, this comes from user VacationWows99.
• 1:12:25
  Speaker 4: If you want to submit your own stories... Go to
• 1:12:28
  Speaker 4: the r slash OKStoryTime subreddit, I'm Keon, and I'm Savannah,
• 1:12:31
  Speaker 4: and we are just goofy people. We only know goofy things,
• 1:12:35
  Speaker 4: and so that's what we're going to tell you, goofy things.
• 1:12:37
  Speaker 4: Let us know what you'd do in the comments down below,
• 1:12:39
  Speaker 4: and we might appreciate it more than you know. As
• 1:12:42
  Speaker 4: Opie says, the differences in the rates between Airbnb and
• 1:12:45
  Speaker 4: lower-end hotels versus four- to five-star hotels is staggering, to
• 1:12:49
  Speaker 4: say the least, without even getting into the airfare. I
• 1:12:52
  Speaker 4: told her that I simply could not afford that and
• 1:12:54
  Speaker 4: she offered to pay for me. She said I could
• 1:12:56
  Speaker 4: pay her what I would have spent on an economy
• 1:12:59
  Speaker 4: class airfare ticket plus hotels in my range and she
• 1:13:02
  Speaker 4: will simply pay the difference. This makes me uncomfortable. As
• 1:13:07
  Speaker 4: generous as her offer is, I don't think I'm at
• 1:13:09
  Speaker 4: the stage of my relationship where I can accept such
• 1:13:11
  Speaker 4: a huge gift from someone. The difference according to my
• 1:13:14
  Speaker 4: calculations will be over 3k and could be as much
• 1:13:17
  Speaker 4: as 5k once we actually book. That's simply too much
• 1:13:21
  Speaker 4: for me to accept. I want to politely decline her
• 1:13:24
  Speaker 4: offer and see if we can work out a compromise.
• 1:13:26
  Speaker 4: And we have an update. Savannah, we are at a
• 1:13:29
  Speaker 4: standstill here. I get it. When people buy me things,
• 1:13:33
  Speaker 4: especially very expensive things, like reasonably priced, really appreciate. But
• 1:13:38
  Speaker 4: it's like a fancy dinner or like fancy thing that
• 1:13:41
  Speaker 4: I'm like, why did you do that? And they say,
• 1:13:43
  Speaker 4: I want to treat you or like you deserve it.
• 1:13:45
  Speaker 4: Or like, I love you. And I'm like, it makes
• 1:13:48
  Speaker 4: me a little uncomfortable.
• 1:13:49
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's not when people do that for me. I
• 1:13:52
  Speaker 1: don't I wouldn't say I get like uncomfortable.
• 1:13:56
  Speaker 3: But I would say not uncomfortable, but more so like
• 1:14:00
  Speaker 3: it makes me feel bad.
• 1:14:01
  Speaker 1: I'm like, you don't have to feel.
• 1:14:02
  Speaker 4: Like I owe you something or like you had to
• 1:14:04
  Speaker 4: hold this over my head. And maybe that's how I
• 1:14:06
  Speaker 4: was raised. Oh, yeah. No, I don't.
• 1:14:08
  Speaker 3: I don't think that I don't think they're going to
• 1:14:09
  Speaker 3: come back and be like, by the way, you owe
• 1:14:10
  Speaker 3: me this. I think that I'm just like, oh, my gosh,
• 1:14:14
  Speaker 3: like they do not need to do that.
• 1:14:16
  Speaker 1: That's very kind of you. But like.
• 1:14:18
  Speaker 3: I don't want to put you at, you know, in
• 1:14:20
  Speaker 3: a bad position, but obviously she has like generational wealth.
• 1:14:24
  Speaker 4: This girl.
• 1:14:24
  Speaker 1: So this is doing nothing. It's not even causing it.
• 1:14:27
  Speaker 4: This is her breathing air.
• 1:14:29
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:14:29
  Speaker 4: So yeah, this is barely the tip of the iceberg
• 1:14:31
  Speaker 4: for her. Again, family is 0.1%. This is how she
• 1:14:35
  Speaker 4: does things when she travels. I bet where it's, you know,
• 1:14:39
  Speaker 4: the lavish hotels, the top tier resorts, everything is first class.
• 1:14:43
  Speaker 1: I would not be mad at that lifestyle.
• 1:14:45
  Speaker 4: I don't think anyone would be mad at that lifestyle,
• 1:14:46
  Speaker 4: especially if you're not paying for it. OP's uncomfortable. Maybe
• 1:14:50
  Speaker 4: talk to her about it. But if that's what she
• 1:14:52
  Speaker 4: wants to do and she's okay with doing that and says,
• 1:14:56
  Speaker 4: I want to give you this gift and pay this difference,
• 1:14:58
  Speaker 4: what have you, if that makes you more comfortable, I
• 1:15:01
  Speaker 4: say go with it, OP.
• 1:15:03
  Speaker 3: Or, like, if you really want to, like, split the
• 1:15:04
  Speaker 3: cost or whatever, one of you can buy, you know,
• 1:15:07
  Speaker 3: the airline tickets and then the other one could buy
• 1:15:09
  Speaker 3: the hotel or something. Or, like, if she buys all
• 1:15:12
  Speaker 3: of it, you pay for all the meals or something.
• 1:15:14
  Speaker 1: You know, like, you can try to find, like, a compromise.
• 1:15:17
  Speaker 4: I don't know. What I've got from 0.1% is everything
• 1:15:22
  Speaker 4: is top tier for the most part. And I know
• 1:15:24
  Speaker 4: they split 50-50 on everything else, but... This is a vacation.
• 1:15:29
  Speaker 4: Maybe she wants to do a luxury vacation. Maybe you
• 1:15:31
  Speaker 4: guys can try and find a compromise, but let her
• 1:15:34
  Speaker 4: know how you feel. And if she doesn't agree to it,
• 1:15:37
  Speaker 4: maybe just enjoy the ride?
• 1:15:39
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I feel like this is a nice problem to have, truthfully.
• 1:15:44
  Speaker 1: I wish I had this problem. But I don't know.
• 1:15:47
  Speaker 1: I feel like it's not going to... I think you
• 1:15:49
  Speaker 1: need to go on the vacation and see how things
• 1:15:52
  Speaker 1: work out. You're not going to know until you actually
• 1:15:54
  Speaker 1: do it.
• 1:15:54
  Speaker 4: It's an ultimate test. Let's find out what happens. We
• 1:15:57
  Speaker 4: have an update. So, before posting my last post, I
• 1:16:00
  Speaker 4: had already decided that I was going to turn her down.
• 1:16:02
  Speaker 2: Okay.
• 1:16:04
  Speaker 4: And I wanted to get advice on how to politely
• 1:16:06
  Speaker 4: turn her down. After listening to the good people of
• 1:16:08
  Speaker 4: this sub, I opened my mind a little and decided
• 1:16:10
  Speaker 4: to have a talk with her about our relationship. And
• 1:16:13
  Speaker 4: this is including her money and our finances moving forward
• 1:16:16
  Speaker 4: with an open mind. She came over last night after
• 1:16:19
  Speaker 4: work and we talked about her proposal. I told her
• 1:16:21
  Speaker 4: I was incredibly thankful for her offer and But in
• 1:16:25
  Speaker 4: all honesty, it did make me uncomfortable. I explained to
• 1:16:27
  Speaker 4: her that it was because of my middle class background
• 1:16:29
  Speaker 4: and the fact that I'm not a big gift receiver
• 1:16:32
  Speaker 4: in general. She cut me off right then and there
• 1:16:34
  Speaker 4: and said she was sorry if she made me feel
• 1:16:35
  Speaker 4: uncomfortable and she was only coming from a good place.
• 1:16:38
  Speaker 4: She revealed to me that growing up even she had
• 1:16:40
  Speaker 4: feelings similar to mine because she viewed everything as her
• 1:16:44
  Speaker 4: family's money. And only after she matured later on in
• 1:16:46
  Speaker 4: life did she start to feel bad about her wealth
• 1:16:49
  Speaker 4: and privilege. and simply started enjoying it for what it is.
• 1:16:52
  Speaker 4: She told me she has a standing offer from her
• 1:16:54
  Speaker 4: father to work a cushy job in the family business,
• 1:16:58
  Speaker 4: but she still doesn't understand the value of money, and
• 1:17:01
  Speaker 4: that's why she still works on her own. We then
• 1:17:03
  Speaker 4: talked about her family's wealth, and the impact it had
• 1:17:05
  Speaker 4: on her past relationships. She told me that usually she's
• 1:17:07
  Speaker 4: never offered to do something this big for anyone else,
• 1:17:10
  Speaker 4: but she only offered this because she really trusts me.
• 1:17:14
  Speaker 4: She respects me, and has fallen for me hard.
• 1:17:18
  Speaker 2: Oh....
• 1:17:20
  Speaker 1: I don't see an issue here.
• 1:17:22
  Speaker 3: It sounds like everything, you know, you guys kind of
• 1:17:25
  Speaker 3: have this understanding of each other even before all of
• 1:17:29
  Speaker 3: the money and everything. And now you're just trying to
• 1:17:33
  Speaker 3: navigate to see if the other person feels the same
• 1:17:36
  Speaker 3: way about how you feel. And I think, truthfully, you do.
• 1:17:40
  Speaker 3: You guys both feel the same way.
• 1:17:41
  Speaker 1: You both.
• 1:17:42
  Speaker 3: you know, like you, you have enough to live and
• 1:17:45
  Speaker 3: you have enough to spend wisely and to, you know,
• 1:17:49
  Speaker 3: spend on stuff that you just want, not a necessity,
• 1:17:52
  Speaker 3: you know? So if that's what she wants to do,
• 1:17:54
  Speaker 3: that's what she wants to do. But she also, I,
• 1:17:56
  Speaker 3: I love, I love how she was also very understanding
• 1:17:59
  Speaker 3: of you and how you.
• 1:18:03
  Speaker 1: Explained all of it.
• 1:18:04
  Speaker 2: I agree.
• 1:18:04
  Speaker 4: I think you want to live a simple life or
• 1:18:07
  Speaker 4: not so luxurious life and I think that you're both
• 1:18:11
  Speaker 4: on the same page. I think, again, you guys aren't
• 1:18:13
  Speaker 4: even a year in a relationship. She's trying to see
• 1:18:16
  Speaker 4: where you are and how you feel about that. And
• 1:18:19
  Speaker 4: I think we're getting an idea of why she wanted
• 1:18:22
  Speaker 4: to buy you these things, because she's going to bring
• 1:18:25
  Speaker 4: up her past relationships.
• 1:18:26
  Speaker 1: That's what I was thinking, too.
• 1:18:27
  Speaker 3: She probably has had people use her just solely for
• 1:18:29
  Speaker 3: her money in the past, and so she was making
• 1:18:31
  Speaker 3: sure that wasn't, like, the deal here.
• 1:18:34
  Speaker 4: And obviously, this wasn't on a test. Yeah, no. So,
• 1:18:38
  Speaker 4: on to Opie's girlfriend. saying she mentioned that in her
• 1:18:41
  Speaker 4: last relationship she kept everything 50-50 because she wasn't sure
• 1:18:44
  Speaker 4: about the guy and their relationship got very toxic by
• 1:18:48
  Speaker 4: the end because he's simply expected her to pay for everything.
• 1:18:52
  Speaker 1: And there it is.
• 1:18:53
  Speaker 4: She said she loves my ambition and wants me to
• 1:18:55
  Speaker 4: keep progressing in my career. And I think you guys
• 1:18:58
  Speaker 4: are good. I think you guys are navigating this fine.
• 1:19:00
  Speaker 4: You had a A hard boundary, not even a boundary.
• 1:19:04
  Speaker 4: You're just like, I don't like that. You don't have
• 1:19:06
  Speaker 4: to pay for all of this. Let's see if we
• 1:19:08
  Speaker 4: can figure this out together. And she accepted that.
• 1:19:12
  Speaker 3: Yeah, you guys found fairness in all of it, which
• 1:19:14
  Speaker 3: is honestly very, very surprising, truthfully, with how maybe like
• 1:19:20
  Speaker 3: you guys.
• 1:19:21
  Speaker 1: Well, I know OP works. was growing up.
• 1:19:23
  Speaker 3: That way, but it, yeah, it's just, you know, everyone
• 1:19:27
  Speaker 3: just kind of assumes like if you have money, you're
• 1:19:29
  Speaker 3: kind of above everyone else.
• 1:19:30
  Speaker 1: Like your nose is above everyone and whatever.
• 1:19:33
  Speaker 4: Your high maintenance or something like that.
• 1:19:35
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:19:35
  Speaker 3: Or like you're looking down on people, but that's not
• 1:19:37
  Speaker 3: the case. Some people just are more successful than others.
• 1:19:40
  Speaker 3: And that, you know, and not even in that sense,
• 1:19:42
  Speaker 3: they just have, you know, more money than others, but
• 1:19:44
  Speaker 3: it doesn't make you a bad person.
• 1:19:46
  Speaker 4: Yeah. I, like I said, I was the same way,
• 1:19:49
  Speaker 4: middle-class family. But I had very wealthy friends who were like,
• 1:19:52
  Speaker 4: let me buy you this or like, I'll get this
• 1:19:54
  Speaker 4: for you. And I'm like, you don't have to buy
• 1:19:55
  Speaker 4: my friendship. They're like, no, it's not buying your friendship.
• 1:19:58
  Speaker 4: I just like you and I want to do this
• 1:20:00
  Speaker 4: for you. And I'm like, sometimes I'm like, I'm a
• 1:20:01
  Speaker 4: little uncomfortable. Other times I'm like, are you sure?
• 1:20:04
  Speaker 1: And they're like, yeah.
• 1:20:05
  Speaker 4: So it's a gift. But I think you have a
• 1:20:07
  Speaker 4: good communication with your partner. You guys should be fine.
• 1:20:10
  Speaker 4: Let's go ahead and finish up the story. Opie says,
• 1:20:12
  Speaker 4: all that being said, I asked her what it would
• 1:20:14
  Speaker 4: mean for our relationship going forward if I accepted. We
• 1:20:18
  Speaker 4: both decided that nothing changes. We keep on splitting it 50-50,
• 1:20:22
  Speaker 4: as we have so far. She joked that she wouldn't
• 1:20:24
  Speaker 4: let me off the hook for future dates and expenses
• 1:20:27
  Speaker 4: this easily, lol. For any future trips or activities, we
• 1:20:30
  Speaker 4: decided that we won't always go for the most expensive
• 1:20:32
  Speaker 4: options or the most budget-friendly ones and try to find
• 1:20:35
  Speaker 4: more of a middle ground. Ultimately, she insisted that because
• 1:20:38
  Speaker 4: she had already made the offer I had to accept.
• 1:20:42
  Speaker 4: I did with the compromise being that once we are there,
• 1:20:44
  Speaker 4: we are going to split everything else 50-50. And she
• 1:20:47
  Speaker 4: will let me treat her a few times. And we
• 1:20:49
  Speaker 4: won't be splurging the way she is used to on
• 1:20:52
  Speaker 4: past vacations. I'm really thankful that this happened and we
• 1:20:55
  Speaker 4: both feel closer than ever. She will be coming over
• 1:20:57
  Speaker 4: on Friday to spend the weekend with me and plan
• 1:20:59
  Speaker 4: and book this trip. I couldn't be any happier right now.
• 1:21:03
  Speaker 1: Aw, yay!
• 1:21:04
  Speaker 2: Cute.
• 1:21:05
  Speaker 4: Great. Enjoy your Western European trip. I hope Spain, Italy, Portugal, France... Yes.
• 1:21:14
  Speaker 4: are all very fun.
• 1:21:16
  Speaker 3: I'm jealous, but you guys seem like you're doing well.
• 1:21:19
  Speaker 3: And honestly, it wasn't even like it was a disagreement.
• 1:21:22
  Speaker 1: You guys just... You worked through.
• 1:21:25
  Speaker 4: They have different views.
• 1:21:26
  Speaker 1: How you feel.
• 1:21:27
  Speaker 4: Yeah. They grew up very differently, and they're meeting in
• 1:21:30
  Speaker 4: middle ground. And that's what you're supposed to do. They communicated.
• 1:21:33
  Speaker 4: They accepted. They figured it out. They threw some, you know,
• 1:21:38
  Speaker 4: not harsh insults at each other, but like a little
• 1:21:40
  Speaker 4: cute jabs. Like, OK, yeah, you have to accept this,
• 1:21:43
  Speaker 4: but you can treat me when we're there. How about that?
• 1:21:45
  Speaker 4: Does that make you feel good? Cute. Love it. Amazing.
• 1:21:48
  Speaker 1: It was a nice little compromise at the end. We
• 1:21:51
  Speaker 1: love to see it.
• 1:21:52
  Speaker 4: And that's the end of this story.