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From Classroom Teacher to Social Worker: Learning the Lessons that Guide a Life of Service · Hart & Hustle Podcast

• Efrain: Welcome back to another episode here on the Heart and Hustle Podcast. I'm Ephrain. This is Kobe. Hello, how are you doing? Colby: I'm doing great. I I'm living into summer. It feels good. Efrain: Talk talk about it. Why summer so important to you? You're in Boston, so those that understand, it's not a lot of s you know, sun and outside going on, especially during those fall winter times. But why is summer so important? Colby: Feel like it's the reset for me. I I ⁓ I started my career as a teacher and you know, summer always seems like that time to kind of step back and pause. It's a time to get out in nature. It feels free. I love getting to head out, you know, without caring much, without wearing much, you know, in terms of coats and mittens and hats and ⁓ you know, bundling my kids and all that kind stuff. So it's a great time to just be out in the world and ⁓ feels like the pace of life is a little slower. People are happy to you know, be on vacation and things like that. So I I love this time. Efrain: Born and raised in Boston? Colby: No, I'm actually from Philly originally. ⁓ Efrain: Okay. What made you make that transition? Was it just family at at some point in time or you just decided, hey, I need a new change scenery at some point? Colby: Yeah, I I came up here for grad school and ⁓ I was in my twenties and I got here and loved it. I felt like this is a place that I could see myself long term. ⁓ it's a city I I think it it a lot of people come here because of school, because there's so many colleges and stuff here. and it feels like an easy city to get into in terms of the the transience because there are so many new people infused into the scene all the time. It's easier to meet people. There's, you know, lots going on culturally with the arts and music scene and the food scene. So I loved it from the start and ⁓ here I am, you know, twenty five years later or more. Efrain: Which one's your favorite? The art, the music or the food? Colby: Ooh, tough. I'm a foodie, so I I think food is just it's always the the pull for me. But we got a lot of all the above. Efrain: I love it. Yeah. You know, I I stayed at Seaport and we had lobster rolls. And ⁓ my God, those were so ⁓ good. So I get it, I get it. And then ⁓ the first time we went, my wife had ⁓ duck and she still talks about it. That was her favorite. So yeah, there is a lot of good food there. And I think I told you I'm originally from Lawrence. ⁓ didn't spend much time in there, but I remember saying, Hey, I want to go back home. I want to Colby: Right. Efrain: I wanted to go visit what that looked like. And she's like, what the heck is in Boston? Like, what are we really going to be doing? But to this day, it's been one of her favorite trips. You know, we stayed downtown by the seaport. And just, I mean, Lawrence, you can tell why my mom left Lawrence, but seeing downtown Boston was just so beautiful. ⁓ and and it was everything that you just kind of mentioned. So ⁓ it, you know, kudos to you making that decision. How long have you been in in Boston now? Colby: It's been ⁓ I think I came here sometime around two thousand, something like that. So yeah, it it's been twenty five, twenty six years, something like that. Yeah. That feels good to be in progressive city. That's another draw for me. You know, that it feels like there are a lot of people who are interested in social change and social justice. And so that that feels great too. Efrain: Some time. Yeah. Wow. Hey, and you start talking. Could we talk about you starting your career? I think it was twenty one years old. You mentioned you started a career teaching, right? Is that if I'm correct? ⁓ is that what you always wanted to do? And then what made you pivot to now being in the sector that you're in today? Colby: Yep, that's right. Hmm. it's funny. I if you'd asked me when I was ⁓ a a young adult what I was gonna do, ⁓ I'm not sure I would have had a clear sense at that point. I remember actually when I when I was graduating high school, the English department at my high school had a scholarship award that they gave out every year to the ⁓ the person in the senior class who is most likely to become an English teacher. And I was shocked to get the award and I thought, like Really? What do you mean? You that's that's bananas. And then lo and behold, I became an English teacher. ⁓ so I I think I always knew I wanted to work with young people. That has been ⁓ an interest of mine long term. I I grew up working, you know, at a bunch of different jobs ⁓ over my my teenage and in young adult years, ⁓ often with young people, and you know, was a camp counselor for many, many years and did a bunch of volunteering with young people, and so I I felt like that was a a calling for me. And yeah, when I graduated college, I had majored in education. So I was ready to to jump into teaching. ⁓ and I started teaching high school, you know, I was teaching young people who were yeah, I was I was twenty one and and teaching young people who are, you know, fifteen to eighteen. So it was one of those things where I like I needed to really dress the part so I didn't get stopped in the halls for a hall pass and I had to kind of Efrain: ISCO. ⁓ Colby: Make sure everybody knew I was on faculty, not one of the kids. Efrain: How hard was that though? I mean, twenty one years old, yes, you mentioned you're you're really you're young yourself, still learning yourself. I I can imagine that's that age. And then you have these fifteen, sixteen year old that probably think they're twenty one years old. So it's it's it's it's a clash going on. How was that experience? Colby: I loved it. I I had a great time teaching. I really enjoyed the, you know, being so approximate to young people and getting to spend, you know, that full academic year with them. it's a really special role to get to play. ⁓ to kind of walk alongside them in their journey toward getting to know themselves better and, you know, moving through adolescence. I I don't know many people who think of that time as an easy time, right? It's like there's a lot of learning happening. There's a lot ⁓ Efrain: Hey. Colby: They're grappling with a lot of things about their own identities and experiences and and how to find their place in the world. And ⁓ on top of that, many of them are are managing really difficult circumstances, having had to grow up ⁓ too quickly in their own families for a variety of reasons, ⁓ and having to navigate, and now especially in in a more complicated world, ⁓ navigate a lot of things externally that they have to analyze and process. so I think that Period was a really exciting period for me to get to kind of be a sounding board for them and be a place ⁓ where they could feel safe and supported and know that they could talk about whatever it was that was happening in their worlds. ⁓ I really I loved the what was happening before and after school too. That that ended up kind of pulling me into a different realm of working with young people because as much as I loved teaching English and talking about literature and writing and ⁓ all those things, it was really what was happening in young people's lives that kept me, ⁓ kept me up at night and had kind of lit a fire in my belly because, you know, they would they would come and find my classroom before the school day started and and want to hang out there and just talk. Or they'd hang out after school and kind of share about other things that were happening in their families and their lives. and that was really meaningful to me. I felt very lucky and honored to be ⁓ a trusted adult for them. And so that ended up kind of shaping I I ⁓ worked with ⁓ the school social worker who always used to joke with me and say, you know, you're really a social worker at heart. You know that, right? ⁓ and I kind of brushed it off. But then years later I I, you know, I moved to Boston to get a master's in education. And then I ended up going back again after that for master's in social work because she was right. I I really love the social work element ⁓ of kind of looking at the whole person and and figuring out how we can best support young people to thrive. Efrain: I love that you said that. ⁓ I think it's you know, I've heard so many mixed things. So I've always thought that there was a gap in that high school years, especially graduating, right? Because you're going into life and not everyone goes to college. So what happens to those that don't have, you know, the Kobe's to really just be their cheerleader? ⁓ you know, they they tend to go to the wrong places, go in the wrong directions, all these good things. And and then Also, myself being in the space of nonprofit, I've realized the reason I love to do it was because I was exactly what you mentioned, Kobe, that individual in classes that was going through things at home, you know, experiencing not just sexual abuse, but here I am adopted and feeling for for years, why, right? And then feeling like I was also treated differently in my own home. ⁓ there are so many things and it was teachers that really seen me for who I was. So I can imagine that's exactly who you were to these students. Reason that they want to come to your classroom, I can only imagine the reason you probably still have friendships today from some of these students is because you seen them for who they were, you know, at a time of need. So it's it's pretty cool that you mentioned that. I think so many educators forget that piece. ⁓ and and not on down educators, that I think it's one of the hardest jobs that you can do, underpaid jobs at that. ⁓ and and but I always appreciated those that realized that I wasn't a bad kid. Life was really life and that can sit here and say, Hey, I know this is not you. What is really going on? And trying to find out more to to kind of lead me in a different direction, which kind of led you into a differ different direction as well. I mean, you did teaching and then you pivoted. So where are you today? What what is your role and what organization are you with today? Colby: Yeah, so ⁓ I first of all I just want to say I'm so glad that you found those adults because I think that ⁓ people who had them assume that everybody has them, ⁓ that all young people have access to to consistent positive adults, and that's just not the case for a lot of young people. And that's when those roles are especially important. And and it can be lots of different kinds of adults, right? Teachers are one group of folks who come to mind, but obviously there's so many ways that Efrain: Mm-hmm. Colby: adults can step in and play a pivotal role in in supporting young people. ⁓ So yeah, I I came to ⁓ to grad school doing master's education, but knowing that I probably was not going to go back into the classroom, I really wanted to look at macro issues and ⁓ and focus on anti-homophobia education. And so when I was in grad school, I ended up making a film as part of a one of my classes. I I made a film with a friend Efrain: Absolutely. Colby: And ⁓ it ended up getting some traction and so we did screenings ⁓ around the country in a number of different environments. And one place I did a screening was a social service agency here in the Greater Boston area. And they came to me afterwards and they said, Hey, we're looking to start up a group home for LGBTQ young people and we'd love to have you come work for the program, ⁓ be part of the founding leadership team. And I said, you know, yeah, yeah, yeah, call me when you've got a program. Sounds like a great idea, but you know it Efrain: Ha ha ha. Colby: This sounds like a ways off. and they followed up with me not too long after that and they said, you know, the ink isn't even dry. We just signed a contract with the state. We're gonna open up this program. It's gonna be the first of its kind in the nation, a group home for LGBTQ teens. ⁓ and so we'd like you to come ⁓ and and join the team and and you know, put the building blocks together to really build this from the ground up, create the policies and and practices and help hire the staff and ⁓ and get this whole program going. Efrain: Mm-hmm. Colby: ⁓ and that remains one of the pieces of my career that I feel most proud of. It it's a program ⁓ that meant a lot to me and where I learned a lot ⁓ and and ended up becoming a social worker during that time. And that was my foray into working with young people in foster care officially. I I had worked with a lot of young people over the years who ⁓ struggled with a variety of issues ⁓ and system involvement. And that was the thing that kind of that that put the fire in my belly that I thought, you know, there's just a lot of kids who don't get a fair shake, who through no fault of their own, ⁓ just don't have the things that they need to be set up for success. And so if I can play some small role in helping to be an adult who believes in them, ⁓ somebody that they can count on ⁓ to be in their corner, I want to be able to do that. And so ⁓ I had that opportunity working at that group home and Efrain: Yeah. Colby: ⁓ I I really then felt like working with young people in foster care really became a call-in for me. So I was there for a number of years working with that organization. ⁓ when ⁓ after about eight or so years there, a a former boss of mine who I stayed in touch with came to me and said, You know, I just interviewed for this role with an organization that's looking for a CEO. They do mentoring for kids in foster care, and I think you should check it out. And I said, You know, I'm not looking for a job, that's okay. And and she said, I really think you should just Go take a look. And ⁓ I ended up interviewing and thought, this is really cool. Like this is the hopeful side of child welfare because young people were opting into mentoring relationships. They weren't being told they had to go. They weren't being mandated into certain programs. They could make a choice and say, I'd love to have an adult mentor. I'd love to be connected with somebody who's gonna, you know, do fun things with me, who's gonna help me prepare for adulthood and learn the life skills I need. Efrain: Mm-hmm. Colby: ⁓ so I ended up then ⁓ applying for the job officially and here I am seventeen years later, ⁓ still with Silverlining Mentoring and I absolutely love the work and and the young people we work with are really, really remarkable. So I I feel very lucky to get to to love what I do every day. Efrain: I love it. Seems like you really fell in line with that passion and purpose and not so much the paychecks as I always kinda mentioned. ⁓ really early too, right? Colby: That I my mom said something to me when I was a teenager. ⁓ when I was I remember those kind of early conversations when people would say, like, I said, How do you figure out what you want to do, like for a job? And she said, Well, you figure out what you love to do, and then you find a way to get paid for it and make it into your profession. So I was like, Okay, I love working with young people. I love advocating and you know, helping folks who don't necessarily have the same privileges that I have. ⁓ as somebody who's white, as somebody who grew up in their family of origin and had a roof over my head and love and support and resources. ⁓ it feels like I'm one of those like those to whom much is given, much is expected. And so I'd love to be able to kind of aim to live into that as best as I can. Efrain: ⁓ yeah. And then I think if correct me I'm wrong here, I felt like every step of the way was teaching you something for the next chapter. I mean, working with the students to then going to the foster home, to them going from the foster home to into the mentoring, am I right here? Like every chapter was just getting you prepared for the next? Colby: I mean, I don't know if I saw it that way at the time, right? Like it's it's never linear. I never want to make it seem like, ⁓ it's just this like easy thing and and it, you know, it it just happens. But I think ⁓ I think when I talk to young people about that process of of figuring out your path, it's being aware of when doors can be open to you and and taking a leap. Like I remember Efrain: Yeah. Colby: being really nervous when I applied for this job ⁓ and and when I got the job, being like, ooh, I had imposter syndrome. And when I got into grad school, same thing. Like, I don't know. Did they really mean to say yes to me? Like, you know, can can I do this? and I think that's part of, you know, what our culture tells a lot of folks who, you know, hold minority identities and experiences. It's like the the sense of worthiness isn't necessarily conferred upon ⁓ us the same way it is others. And so Efrain: Yeah. Colby: That feeling of like I'm anxious and excited at the same time. Like that word that I think ⁓ Glenn and Doyle calls skidded. So scared and excited. I think that's it. Like that little like flutter, that little nervousness, ⁓ and the excitement and the feeling of like, okay, I I'd love to take on this challenge. To me, that's a signal that it's the right next step. ⁓ I never like to be too comfortable, you know. I I think that we can all Efrain: Guided. Colby: We all can imagine the jobs that we could take that would be easy or the experiences that would be easy and comfortable. And sometimes that's that's right for a moment. but I think being open to opportunities that kind of push you a little bit outside of your comfort zone are the ones that really become the most rewarding. That that little challenge ends up ⁓ making us grow. Efrain: And for those that are watching or listening, imposter syndrome is is it still a thing for you? 'Cause I I feel like we don't really get away from it. There's gonna be those times and those rooms that we're like, How did I get here? Do I belong here? Realizing that yeah, you do, right? Are you are it's still kicking you sometimes that imposter syndrome? Colby: ⁓ sure. Absolutely. Yeah. I mean, I I think I guess I'd be nervous for the folks who it never hits. Like that's probably a warning sign, right? Like if you're if you're too confident that you always belong at the, you know, at the big places, then you know, you're probably missing something. But ⁓ yeah, I think there's all kinds of ways that imposter syndrome just rears its head. ⁓ and I think that's a piece of like Efrain: Yeah. Colby: It's an opportunity to reassure ourselves and to look in the mirror and remind ourselves about, you know, the things that we feel strongest in and the the places that we know we've grown. ⁓ and then as you build up those kind of those experiences that edify your confidence, that can be the reminder, you know, the next time it comes up. So for sure, I am not free of it. and in some ways I hope I never am, but I I've gained more confidence in in what I feel like I can. Efrain: Yeah. Colby: to ⁓ with with more ease. Efrain: Kobe, on this journey, we kind of mentioned how it is important to have people in your corner, people that see you for who you are, ⁓ and really just pour into you. Who was that for you? I mean, going through this journey and taking on some challenges and ⁓ you know, being able to be authentically you. Who is that person to kind of say, Hey, this this is it. This is what you should be doing, this is how you do it. Do you recall any of those people in your life that really got you to where you are today? Colby: Yeah, for and I was so lucky and and it really does feel like a mixture of luck and privilege that I did have ⁓ a lot of those people. And I I feel like I had that in my family for starters. ⁓ again, both ⁓ I feel like I won Ovarian roulette. I I was born into a family where I had unconditional love and ⁓ from a very early age felt that that that I would have that love no matter what. So from my parents, from my extended family. ⁓ I I was surrounded by lots of family aunts and uncles and grandparents, ⁓ as well as my parents who really just expressed that care and support. ⁓ and then I had teachers along the way and coaches and ⁓ youth group leaders and lots of people who I felt like encouraged me. So I could I could ⁓ and point to a number of different people and I think ⁓ what that points to is is kind ⁓ the luck and privilege that I had. And I didn't realize when I was a kid that not everybody had that. I kind of I thought that was the norm. ⁓ it was really eye opening as I got older to realize that was pretty unique. ⁓ and I feel lucky, you know, I I'm part of the queer community and I had done a ⁓ identify as non-binary. And I feel like when I look at LGBTQ kids coming up and how many of them feel really isolated and can't count on that kind of support from their families of origin and are desperately seeking support and ⁓ and trust and guidance from other people in their lives, it it makes me want to double down on mentoring and ⁓ and opportunities for young people to find those safe spaces where they feel like they can belong, whoever they are. We all need to be able to have people that we look up to ⁓ and and can kind of feel like reflect back our value and our worth. And I think when you don't see images of yourself, when you don't know people who identify in the ways that you do or have had experiences like you have, it can be hard to know your worth. ⁓ and so, you know, I I imagine you can identify, you know, you mentioned as an adapted person, you were kind of seeking some of that. And I think that's true for so many of us who can't necessarily look around and see people who are just like us. I know in my in my family, I was the only LGBTQ person I knew ⁓ for a long time in my life. And I didn't have out role models. ⁓ I couldn't point to adults who were out. and you know my parents didn't have queer friends that they knew of or other family members. So I was kind of having to figure it out on my own. and no one should have to do that. So I think the more we can talk about representation and show up for other folks both within our identity groups and across difference, the more we can help people recognize ⁓ the value of letting their voices be heard and trusting their experiences and ⁓ kind of standing in their own power. Efrain: Yeah. Mm-hmm. That is ⁓ always a struggle, even for me now, is understanding where I was, where my family. I'm one of eighteen kids, I think I told you this. And not a lot of my family got to see the other side. And I and and there's a little bit of everything that you just kinda mentioned in my family. And someone actually asked me recently, like, what made you different? Right. And I said, God really put good people in my life, as you mentioned. People that believed in me, people that seen more in me than I was seeing in myself. I mean, I always say The reason I married my wife is because she loved me more than I loved myself, you know, when I first met her. And in reality, I don't know that I knew what love looked like. Right. I I r recall my younger brother coming home after years where he felt also neglected, unloved, all these different things. And and of course, because this is my biological brother, ⁓ I was part of the conversation and he mentioned how you never said you love me, you know, and my ⁓ my mom, you know, I I realized that everyone goes to their own stories, right? And and now realizing that she was she was also kind of breaking cycles here, trying to do the best she could of what she knew. She says, listen, like what do you mean? Like everything I did for you, you didn't you didn't see, you know, you didn't feel it. And it's people love is different for so many different people. And this is someone that was taken from his family, went to the fossil system, came back into our home and was just kind of lost. Because as you mentioned, he was battling with the his sexuality because of some of the sexual abuse things that was happening. I mean, I still some sometimes like now, because of my experiences and and what it looked like to be sexual abused, always used to ask myself, am I bi? Am I straight? Because of these things that happened in my life. And these are things that people deal with every single day and don't talk about it. And I and I I love to just be open because I realize you talked about representation. It's not even the color of our skin. Is is the stories that we tell, is who we are, for people to realize that they are not alone in this world. So I mean, I commend you, Colby, for doing the work that you've done for over years, for being who you are, authentically you. ⁓ I think that's major more now than ever, is be your true self. And and and people are while not everyone's going to appreciate you, there's going to be those people that are really appreciative of you because you are showing that it is possible, that that they it that they could do it, right? That they could be loved. ⁓ So I can imagine that this work doesn't go unnoticed for a lot of people. And you probably have watered some seeds or even planted some seeds that people don't even that you don't even know. Right. ⁓ that's just kind of what life is about. ⁓ with for half half a million kids in the foster care system, what what ⁓ what are some of those stories that we can tell them to inspire and to motivate and to uplift them? Because we don't know who's listening. But I think there's so many people that just need to hear that voice from someone like yourself that's in the space. Colby: I'm inspired by them. I I am so in awe all the time by young people in foster care and alums of the foster care system ⁓ who have been dealt often an unfair hand. Again, through no fault of their own, they ended up in the foster care system because of a variety of circumstances and their families of origin and the larger systems at play, right? We know that a lot of young people end up in foster care. As a direct result of poverty. And we can talk all about how poverty is impacting different communities in different ways. ⁓ and and how our young people who are black and brown and LGBTQ are disproportionately represented in the foster care system, right? There's all sorts of disparities at play here. And in spite of all of the hurdles that they have faced, all of the trauma that they have endured, young people in foster care. Are some of the strongest, most courageous and wise and resilient young people and adults, frankly, who I've ever met. Because they've had to figure out how to make it in a world that wasn't friendly to them, in a world that was not saying, here's the path and here's the support, and we're gonna prop you up. And they had to learn how to read people from a really early age, right? How to keep themselves safe when they may have been surrounded by adults or circumstances where there's domestic violence or folks who were addicted to substances and they had to, you know, kind of predict behaviors and read body language and tone of voice in order to know how to respond or protect their siblings. They're parentified at early ages, right? There's all sorts of ways that they had to learn things that other people who grew up in their families of origin got handed to them or saw role modeled very easily. Right. So I think there's so much strength in this community of young people in foster care. And my hope is that folks can feel connected to one another. I think the power of community is immense. And foster care can be isolating for a lot of young people. It can feel like, you know, nobody understands, you know, oftentimes, You know, you're going to school with other people who it it seems like everybody's living in their family of origin and and no one's you don't know if other people are in foster care, right? Unless they've come out about it. And most of the time kids don't necessarily want to share that. It's not something that they feel proud of. It's not something that other people understand. So then, you know, kids will talk about it all the time. If it just makes the conversation weird, they'll say, you know, like people don't know what to do, they ask th all these questions, they don't get it. ⁓ and again, you know Efrain: Yeah. Colby: with with good intention most of the time, but it can feel like they feel very misunderstood. And ⁓ I've had a lot of kids talk about feeling like damaged goods, they'll say. Like they just they just have gotten knocked around and moved from place to place. You know, in in Massachusetts, on average young people get moved eight times ⁓ during their system involvement. And I I the organization I work at, Silver Lighting Mentoring, Efrain: Mm. Colby: ⁓ we work with young people, most of whom have been removed from their families of origin and are living in congregate care. They're living in group home settings, which are institutional settings where they're living with sometimes dozens and dozens of other young people in a program where staff are cycling through on eight-hour shifts. So they don't have that opportunity to develop consistent, positive relationships. and all of the adults in the world, or most of the adults in the world, are paid to be there. Efrain: Yeah. Colby: And so that's why I think ⁓ it's so important to be able to put mentors in place for young people who want them and to find community where young people can connect with others in foster care, alums of the foster care system, and other young people who are in care, so that they can have their experience validated and hear the voices of those who have been through similar circumstances and how they got there. ⁓ We have some mentors at Silverlining who are alums of the foster care system themselves. And we were founded by a young man who grew up in foster care. And that means a lot to young people, just to know that somebody else shared their experience. Efrain: Yeah. And at that point in their lives, ⁓ especially through high school, being a mentor and sticking with it, I can imagine there's you there's like you have to stick with these kids for a certain amount of time. ⁓ and I say that because I remember someone ⁓ introducing me to this mentor and I was super excited. He looked like me, right? He was a Latin man, he was a suc successful Latin man. I'd only seen him one day, and he t I remember him taking me like around Rollins College or a pretty prestige college here, private college. And I was pretty excited to continue that. And I met him that one day and I never met that guy again. And I thought to myself, like, why? Right. And already in my life, feeling like people were walking away on me, ⁓ that hurt. Right. And I I I have now go find and then sometimes you find it in the wrong people. You think these are really good people, realize they weren't for you. You know, that happened in my life as well, because we start looking in the wrong places. But Colby, when people are signing up for mentoring. How important is it to be there, not saying years, but a good amount of time to really feel like someone i is is valued and that you're really giving them your time? Colby: You're hitting on the a really core part of our model at Silverlining. ⁓ the consistency is absolutely critical. I I would say a person who shows up one time is not a mentor. That's a a guy you met, right? And and he showed you around and it sounds like it it made an impression. but unfortunately the goodbye leaves a scar for a lot of people. ⁓ and so we know that young people in foster care have So many unplanned exits, so many people who end up coming in and out of their lives. It's like a revolving door of strangers. And so we ask for a commitment of at least eight hours a month for at least one year from the time of the match, of the time that the mentor and mentee meet. ⁓ but that said, we say from the beginning, our hope is that the relationship will be longer term. And so we ask for that commitment, and then each year. We reconnect with the mentor and mentee on their matchaversary. We're supporting them throughout the entire year. We're we're in very close contact with both the young person and the adult. ⁓ so they have a program coordinator at Silverlining who's kind of helping that relationship and supporting along. ⁓ but every year on the matchaversary, they celebrate and we have talked to the mentor and mentee ahead of time to say, Do you want to continue on for another year? We do it one year at a time, just saying, you know, we want to. Keep it manageable and not ask people to make an unreasonable commitment long term, but we hope that you'll stay together. And so on the match diversary, they reflect on, you know, the the past year, their goals together, what they've learned about themselves, what they've learned about the other person. and we ask if they want to re-up the relationship. And we're really proud at silver lining of our match length, our average match length. In the world of mentoring, that's kind of like the calling card. People talk about, you know, what's your average match length? ⁓ because match length is equated with match strength. The longer, the stronger. And so ⁓ at Silverlining, our average match length is nearly four years, ⁓ which is more than double the national average. And again, we're working with a population of young people that is quite transient, right? That's being bounced around from place to place. And we're working with mentors who are volunteering their time. They are not paid. And that's a really critical piece. Efrain: Wow. Colby: Of our approach because again, so many of the adults, if not all the adults in our young people's world, are paid to be there. So it feels really different to have someone who's showing up just because they want to, because they're invested in that young person, not because it has anything to do with a paycheck. So that consistency and longevity are absolutely crucial. And we're screening for that. We have a an extensive screening and training process, ⁓ background checks, clinical interviews, applications. eight plus hours of training. So we put people through ⁓ quite a process before they ever are introduced to a young person because we want to get to know them well so that we can make a good match. And we want to know that they're going to show up for us and be consistent because if if they're not showing up for us, they're not going to show up for a young person. So we want to know that earlier. Efrain: Correct. Wha how many young kids are you guys serving on a yearly basis? Colby: Yeah, so in the greater Boston area, we're serving about 200 young people each year. ⁓ and then nationally we have the Silverlining Institute, which is teaching best practices to other organizations. So we work with youth serving organizations all across the country. Currently, we've been in 37 states and we impact over 10,000 young people every year through the institute. ⁓ and then we've actually recently launched an e-mentoring program, which allows young people anywhere in the United States to access a mentor and they connect with that person. on screen through their computer or their phone. ⁓ but it's a live person to person relationship. But for young people who may not have an in-person mentoring program in their area or would prefer to connect through technology because, you know, they may be working and parenting and other things. And so it's easier ⁓ to connect without having to worry about travel time. That e mentoring relationship is in place for teens and young adults. And that's really to support them in the aging out process and ⁓ to help focus on life skills goals like Education and employment and housing. Efrain: I love that. And how does someone find out about you guys? Like if I'm someone that f knows that I'm in the fossil system, knows that I need a mentor, how am I finding this organization? Colby: We hope ⁓ we hope that we'll come up quickly on a Google search for you. ⁓ so you can go to silverlining mentoring.org and there are ways to get involved there. We we run workshops ⁓ for local folks here in the Greater Boston area. We have all kinds of events and workshops that folks can come to ⁓ if they're part of our community. And then again, if if you're outside of the Greater Boston area, e-mentoring is a great way to get involved. So you can contact us and let us know that you're interested. ⁓ if there are any folks out there who have aged out of the foster care system. or are 16 and older and would like to be connected with a a mentor ⁓ online, we would love to talk with you. So please do get in touch. Efrain: What is the website for Food Girl Find It? Colby: Yeah, it's www.silverlining mentoring dot org. Efrain: You guys have any socials, TikToks, Instagrams, any of that stuff? Colby: Yeah, we're on Instagram. ⁓ we're on LinkedIn. ⁓ I don't think we're on Facebook, but we are on Instagram. That's our biggest. Actually we are on Facebook. I'm wrong about that. Yeah. Efrain: Got it. And Facebook. I can imagine. You're probably on Facebook. There's so many socials out there, we can't even keep track of them. That's what it is. ⁓ what is a a myth that we need to debunk before we depart? A lot of people are thinking about the foster system in so many different ways. I think we talked about about so many different things about statistics that people may not have known. ⁓ but what is one that we should debunk? A myth that people that you hear all the time? Colby: Yeah. I think for people who don't know much about foster care, ⁓ they have a stigma about the kinds of kids who are in foster care and why they're in care. And so I always try to remind people kids come into foster care through no fault of their own. So it's not because they're bad kids. It's not because they, you know, have done X, Y, Z thing. It's because they have Been in circumstances in their family where they have not been able to get their needs met. They've not been kept safe for a variety of reasons outside of that kid. So young people in foster care want the same things that all young people want. They have hopes and dreams, they have strengths and areas of interest that they want to pursue and they want to belong just like everybody else. But they don't necessarily have the avenues to connect. with consistent adults because that's the one thing they've been deprived of once they become involved in the system. So I hope that people can know young people come into foster care through no fault of their own and are just like other kids in so many ways, but they don't have those natural avenues of support. Efrain: Kobe, I really thank you for your time for you just enlighten of what you guys are doing ⁓ at your organization, but also just to be able to talk to those ⁓ that are in the system that may just need someone to hear them and see them. I think me and you both have so much ⁓ just time in this space, me being that individual, but you pouring back into individuals like me. I thank you. ⁓ it is it's not a easy job. I can imagine that you go home sometimes wanting to take all the kids, right? I I that's that's just how I feel sometimes. Like I just want to take all we all these kids. But ⁓ to know that there is work being done and so much work still to be done. ⁓ you're definitely that leader that I really appreciate. For those that are watching, make sure that you guys check in. There's so many different organizations when we talk about faucet kids in your area. Check out where can volunteer. And as we mentioned, being a mentor is not just showing up once, but it's also just showing up and being consistent. It makes a difference. It has made a difference for me in my life to just find leaders that to this day I still speak to because they've seen me for who I was. And I appreciate it. ⁓ Kobe, thank you so much for your time. I'm Ephraim. This is Kobe. We'll catch you on the next one. Later. Colby: Thanks so much. Take care.