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The #1 Reason Coaching Fails (And The Secret to Lasting Change) (28) · The One Person Podcast

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Hey, there, it's Terri-Ann, host of the One Person Podcast.
• 0:02
  Speaker 1: It's time to grab your favorite cup of coffee or cup of tea and dive into something that's probably been driving you crazy.
• 0:10
  Speaker 1: You know that person who does all the work has had some amazing breakthroughs and was totally fired up about their new path and then somehow ended up right back where they started six months later.
• 0:22
  Speaker 1: You know the one.
• 0:24
  Speaker 1: Perhaps you know them even intimately.
• 0:25
  Speaker 1: Well, today we're going to talk about why that happens and, more importantly, how to prevent it.
• 0:31
  Speaker 1: It's a big episode, so get ready, strap yourself in and let's get to it.
• 0:36
  Speaker 1: If there was a guarantee that you could create your dream life, a life that truly mattered to you, would you want it?
• 0:45
  Speaker 1: My name is Terri-Ann Palmer-Peacock and I am delighted to welcome you to the One Person Podcast.
• 0:51
  Speaker 1: I have a belief that one person can make a difference in the world.
• 0:55
  Speaker 1: When we show up as the best version of ourselves, when we create and live our dream lives, we make a positive impact on ourselves and the world around us.
• 1:04
  Speaker 1: So if simple, actionable, step-by-step strategies, tools and tips on how to do that inspires you, then you are in the right place, my friend.
• 1:15
  Speaker 1: So let's get started Now.
• 1:20
  Speaker 1: This episode is targeted for my coaches or entrepreneurs considering a coaching career path.
• 1:25
  Speaker 1: Now, that being said, it's also one of the most common coaching lessons we teach our entrepreneurial clients.
• 1:31
  Speaker 1: So if that's you, there's definitely a lesson here for you today as well.
• 1:36
  Speaker 1: Now, I had a situation happen last year.
• 1:39
  Speaker 1: Now let's call the person Sarah.
• 1:40
  Speaker 1: She was a brilliant coach herself and was working with female entrepreneurs.
• 1:46
  Speaker 1: Now she came to me because, despite having all the right strategies, her business kept hitting the same ceiling.
• 1:52
  Speaker 1: Now she'd done the mindset work, she'd mapped out clear action steps, she even had invested in a whole heap of new systems.
• 1:58
  Speaker 1: But guess what?
• 1:58
  Speaker 1: Six months later, she was right back in the same revenue bracket, feeling frustrated and stuck.
• 2:05
  Speaker 1: Now here's the thing, and this is going to change how you approach problems in the future she was focusing on the wrong thing.
• 2:12
  Speaker 1: She was trying to solve the problem without understanding the structure that created it in the first place.
• 2:20
  Speaker 1: Now stay with me as I take you behind the curtain and explain what I mean here.
• 2:24
  Speaker 1: This is something that most coaching organizations and that don't talk about, and they certainly don't teach their coaches.
• 2:30
  Speaker 1: So I want you to think about it like this Imagine that you're trying to help somebody get fit.
• 2:36
  Speaker 1: For example, they might buy the gym membership, they might get the fancy workout clothes because, let's face it, you always work out better when you look good and they might even hire a personal trainer.
• 2:46
  Speaker 1: But if the underlying structure of their life is in their daily schedule, their relationship with self-care, their sleep patterns, if all those things don't also support their fitness goals, well, what happens?
• 2:58
  Speaker 1: Yep, they're back on the couch with Netflix and take out within a few months, and this is because it's what we call structural thinking.
• 3:07
  Speaker 1: This is absolute gold.
• 3:09
  Speaker 1: For us coaches or anyone who's interested in being the best version of themselves, is to think about it from a structure perspective and instead of just looking at the surface level problems where most people spend most majority of their time, we, as entrepreneurs and people who want to live our lives as the best version of ourselves well, we're going to dig deeper into the structures that are holding those problems in place or, in most cases, creating them.
• 3:37
  Speaker 1: So let me share something fascinating that I see all the time with entrepreneurs and I bet you've probably noticed it too and it's something that I'm calling the entrepreneurial pendulum, and it looks like this so they might go all in on client work, but then they burn out and they pull back.
• 3:56
  Speaker 1: They might focus intensely on their marketing, but then they get overwhelmed and so go dead silent.
• 4:02
  Speaker 1: They invest heavily in their business, then get scared and start hoarding cash.
• 4:04
  Speaker 1: They hire help, but then they get overwhelmed and so go dead silent.
• 4:05
  Speaker 1: They invest heavily in their business, then get scared and start hoarding cash.
• 4:07
  Speaker 1: They hire help, but then they panic and go back to doing everything themselves.
• 4:13
  Speaker 1: Do any of these scenarios sound familiar?
• 4:15
  Speaker 1: Because they aren't random patterns.
• 4:17
  Speaker 1: They're actually predictable oscillations created by underlining structures.
• 4:23
  Speaker 1: And here's the kicker.
• 4:24
  Speaker 1: Oscillations created by underlining structures, and here's the kicker.
• 4:29
  Speaker 1: Until we help our clients, or until we understand and change these structures, they'll keep swinging back and forth just like a pendulum.
• 4:35
  Speaker 1: Now let's break this down with a real example that might be close to home.
• 4:38
  Speaker 1: So you know those clients who are constantly struggling with their pricing.
• 4:42
  Speaker 1: They raise their rates, they feel great about them for a while, then slowly start offering discounts or taking on lower paying clients until they're back where they started.
• 4:51
  Speaker 1: Ever heard of them?
• 4:52
  Speaker 1: Well, here's what's probably happening at a structural level their identity structure doesn't match their pricing structure, in other words, their identity or who they think of themselves as, unconsciously, it's not aligning with what they're charging their clients.
• 5:08
  Speaker 1: Now, sometimes they may mean that they feel unworthy to be able to charge that amount of money, or they feel like they don't have enough knowledge or skills to charge what they're charging, even though they know it's the going market rate, and a trending term at the moment is the imposter syndrome.
• 5:26
  Speaker 1: Their value delivery structure might not be aligned with their new rates.
• 5:31
  Speaker 1: So, in other words, how they're delivering their services whether it's a membership format or one-on-one coaching format somehow that's not in alignment.
• 5:38
  Speaker 1: Their client attraction structure might be still pulling in budget-minded clients rather than value-minded clients.
• 5:46
  Speaker 1: And, of course, the clincher which is typically always part of this as well is their money.
• 5:52
  Speaker 1: Mindset structure is most probably causing an internal conflict.
• 5:55
  Speaker 1: But can you see how all these different structures and all these different things are actually connected to one another?
• 6:01
  Speaker 1: You see, if we were just to work on our raising prices without addressing all these other structural elements, then we're basically guaranteeing that the pendulum is going to swing straight back to where they started from Now.
• 6:15
  Speaker 1: Over the years that I've been coaching, I've discovered there are three levels of change.
• 6:19
  Speaker 1: For most people.
• 6:20
  Speaker 1: There's the first level, which is what I call the surface level, and this is what most clients come for.
• 6:25
  Speaker 1: They want a quick fix, they want a tactical solution which is basically only going to give them temporary results.
• 6:31
  Speaker 1: This is you or your client, particularly when you want something fixed now and you want it fixed right now.
• 6:39
  Speaker 1: You don't want to know the how, you don't want to know any of the details, you just want your result changed.
• 6:45
  Speaker 1: And, to be honest, in our fast-paced, moving world, that's where a lot of people sit and they're happy with just getting that surface level fix.
• 6:53
  Speaker 1: What they're not happy with is six months later repeating that same pattern or getting those same results.
• 6:58
  Speaker 1: So step two, or the second level, is what I call the pattern level, and this is where, if you're working with a mindset coach this is where most of the coaches in that will sit here and this is where they're making behavior changes.
• 7:11
  Speaker 1: They're changing your habits, which is good, but it's probably still not long lasting, which is good, but it's probably still not long lasting.
• 7:21
  Speaker 1: If you want real change, if you want transformational change forever, then you need to focus on the third level, which is focusing at the structural level, because this is where lasting transformation happens.
• 7:31
  Speaker 1: This is where fundamental shifts in how things are organized in your brain happen, and because that's changing at that level, it creates natural and sustainable change.
• 7:42
  Speaker 1: Now let me give you a personal example.
• 7:44
  Speaker 1: I had a client, and I'm going to call him Tom.
• 7:46
  Speaker 1: He was struggling to scale his coaching business.
• 7:49
  Speaker 1: Now he had tried everything better time management, he'd hired VAs, he was using project management tools but he kept hitting the same wall.
• 7:59
  Speaker 1: Now, when we dug into his structure, we discovered that the real issue wasn't his systems or his time management.
• 8:04
  Speaker 1: It was actually how his business was fundamentally organized.
• 8:08
  Speaker 1: He had structured everything around him, which meant he was the bottleneck, even though his goal or his vision was wanting to scale neck, even though his goal or his vision was wanting to scale.
• 8:21
  Speaker 1: So what we had to do is we had to reorganize the structural elements, his role, his team's roles, his client delivery model, his marketing approach and once we did that, everything started flowing naturally.
• 8:32
  Speaker 1: So how do we actually apply this in our lives or our coaching practices?
• 8:37
  Speaker 1: So, basically, there's a three-step practical framework that you can follow.
• 8:42
  Speaker 1: The first thing is number one you must have awareness, which means you've got to observe the pattern.
• 8:48
  Speaker 1: So what is it that keeps happening in your life.
• 8:50
  Speaker 1: What's the pattern that you actually keep repeating and how often is this pattern repeating for you?
• 8:57
  Speaker 1: Is it monthly, is it weekly, is it yearly, is it daily?
• 9:01
  Speaker 1: And what's the trigger that starts this pattern or this cycle off, right?
• 9:07
  Speaker 1: So that's the first one.
• 9:08
  Speaker 1: You've got to observe the pattern.
• 9:09
  Speaker 1: The second one is then you've got to observe what is the actual current structure that you're running.
• 9:15
  Speaker 1: So what are the beliefs and identity structures that are there, what are the beliefs and identity structures that are there, what are the systems and relationships that are in place, and how do they all interact together?
• 9:23
  Speaker 1: And then, finally, the third step is we get to design the new structure.
• 9:28
  Speaker 1: So what do you really want, what would naturally create that outcome for you, and what do you need to reorganize at that fundamental level?
• 9:38
  Speaker 1: So let me give you a concrete example for this.
• 9:42
  Speaker 1: Now I had a client who was constantly overwhelmed with client work.
• 9:46
  Speaker 1: Now, the obvious solution might be better time management or perhaps hiring some help.
• 9:51
  Speaker 1: But when we actually mapped out the structure, we found that her business was structured around one-to-one work only.
• 9:58
  Speaker 1: Now her pricing structure required high volume to meet her income goals.
• 10:04
  Speaker 1: In other words, she was selling time for money, and her delivery structure demanded her nobody else, just her.
• 10:11
  Speaker 1: And so what happened was her marketing structure, therefore, was attracting reallyintensive clients.
• 10:18
  Speaker 1: So, instead of just adding time management techniques, which would have been at the surface level, or trying to change her work habits, which would have been at the pattern level we reorganized the fundamental structure, which is the base level.
• 10:32
  Speaker 1: So I encouraged her to create a new group program structure.
• 10:38
  Speaker 1: So, rather than just doing one-on-one, we actually put together a mastermind where she could put a few of her clients all into one group, which gave her that time back.
• 10:47
  Speaker 1: We implemented a leveraged pricing structure.
• 10:50
  Speaker 1: We developed a team-supported delivery structure so she didn't have to be the one delivering everything.
• 10:55
  Speaker 1: She could actually have some VAs who were helping her with the templates that she was giving them and some of the more, I suppose, practical elements of it that she didn't need to be a part of.
• 11:06
  Speaker 1: And then we redesigned her marketing to attract her ideal clients.
• 11:10
  Speaker 1: Now the end result?
• 11:12
  Speaker 1: Well, it was changes that actually stuck because they were built into the structure itself.
• 11:18
  Speaker 1: Now I'm going to share probably a more personal example where money was a struggle, and I'm going to call this person Jack.
• 11:25
  Speaker 1: So the first thing again is we observe the pattern.
• 11:29
  Speaker 1: So let's go through this kind of like how it would happen with a conversation with a friend?
• 11:34
  Speaker 1: That might make it a little bit more.
• 11:37
  Speaker 1: What would happen with a conversation with a friend?
• 11:38
  Speaker 1: That might make it a little bit more palatable.
• 11:39
  Speaker 1: So Jack has money come in on payday, but before he knows it, there's more month left at the end of the month than there is money in his bank account, and I'm sure there's lots of people that can relate to that right.
• 11:50
  Speaker 1: So obviously, when you're in that situation, he's now feeling stressed about the situation and results to using his credit cards to bridge the gap before his next paycheck comes in, which, of course, just creates more stress, because now he knows he's got credit card debt.
• 12:05
  Speaker 1: Now this was something that was actually happening to him on a consistent basis, each and every month, and so what would happen was, every time a bill or an invoice came into his inbox or arrived in the letterbox, it triggered a stress response from him and he was ending up just running his days in constant stress.
• 12:25
  Speaker 1: Now what this actually was is he was looking at everything as a problem.
• 12:30
  Speaker 1: He was problem solving everything, which, of course, did nothing but either put him in a fixed problem solving structure or an oscillating one.
• 12:39
  Speaker 1: You know when we talked about the pendulum.
• 12:41
  Speaker 1: So we've now observed the pattern.
• 12:44
  Speaker 1: This is step one.
• 12:45
  Speaker 1: We're identifying what's actually happening and remember, there's no judgment on any of this, we're actually just getting information.
• 12:52
  Speaker 1: So step two is we need to then map out the current structure.
• 12:57
  Speaker 1: So again, just gathering information.
• 13:01
  Speaker 1: So the two is we need to then map out the current structure.
• 13:03
  Speaker 1: So, again, just gathering information.
• 13:04
  Speaker 1: So the information is Jack gets a monthly salary and he also gets some, you know, every now and then some odd freelancing work coming.
• 13:10
  Speaker 1: All his money goes into one bank account.
• 13:12
  Speaker 1: That's it.
• 13:12
  Speaker 1: His expenses, his personal, his business, they all come out of that same bank account.
• 13:18
  Speaker 1: Because he's only got one.
• 13:19
  Speaker 1: His bills arrive at random times throughout the month.
• 13:22
  Speaker 1: Now Jack is a reactive spender, meaning he pays the invoice with the biggest threats, the biggest red writing, the biggest due.
• 13:29
  Speaker 1: Now, whatever is in his face at the time.
• 13:32
  Speaker 1: That's how he pays his bills.
• 13:33
  Speaker 1: Now he also recognizes remember, it's just information that he's falling into scarcity, thinking when the bills come in and he automatically starts to panic that he won't have enough money to meet everything when it's due.
• 13:45
  Speaker 1: Okay, so that's what's happening in terms of his current structure.
• 13:51
  Speaker 1: We now know what's happening in his current reality.
• 13:55
  Speaker 1: So step three is the final step, and this is where we get to design new structures.
• 13:59
  Speaker 1: Now I'm going to be really honest with you.
• 14:02
  Speaker 1: I do kind of shortcut this particular step or this part of the process, because I use my intuition more often than not, but sometimes people need something tangible where they're learning to trust their inner guidance.
• 14:14
  Speaker 1: So this is what I share with them to put them, or to put a physical process for them, in place.
• 14:19
  Speaker 1: It's something that they can grab hold of.
• 14:22
  Speaker 1: So, for example, for Jack, instead of just budgeting better now that would be that surface level structure I mentioned earlier or changing his spending habits Now we're talking about the pattern level.
• 14:34
  Speaker 1: What we need to do is we need to reorganize his fundamental structures, and it might look like something like this so he's got a banking structure.
• 14:44
  Speaker 1: Right now he's got one bank account, so we might reorganize his bank accounts and instead of one bank account, we'd open up several accounts one purely for business-related expenses, one purely for personal expenses.
• 14:57
  Speaker 1: We might open up a savings account, an investment account and a tax account, because, let's face it, there's only two certainties in life death and taxes.
• 15:06
  Speaker 1: So, instead of him only having one bank account for everything, we've now set up a banking structure where he has five bank accounts.
• 15:13
  Speaker 1: So this leads to our next structure which we're going to create, which is his income flow structure.
• 15:19
  Speaker 1: So, now that he has his bank accounts in place and streams for where he can place his money, we're going to set up distribution channels.
• 15:29
  Speaker 1: And this is just.
• 15:30
  Speaker 1: I'm just throwing some numbers out here.
• 15:31
  Speaker 1: Actually, tr Vicar had a book I can't remember the name of it now, but it was a great example of it on how to funnel money in a different way.
• 15:38
  Speaker 1: Or I do like the Australian guy I can't remember his name, gosh, I'm blank today the barefoot money investor.
• 15:44
  Speaker 1: Anyway, he might do something like this 10% of whatever income comes in goes to his tax account.
• 15:50
  Speaker 1: 10% goes to his investment account so that he can you know, he can create income to produce assets for retirement.
• 15:58
  Speaker 1: 10% goes to his savings account these are for holidays or bigger ticket items.
• 16:02
  Speaker 1: 30% goes to his personal account for his day-to-day, you know, or it can almost be his play account as well and 40% to his business account.
• 16:13
  Speaker 1: Now, if you're an entrepreneur, if you were to do something like this, for example, what you'd be looking at is that you would need to make sure that you were making enough money to cover all these percentages enough money to cover all these percentages, so 40% in your business account.
• 16:31
  Speaker 1: Then that really gives you the exact data to make qualified decisions.
• 16:33
  Speaker 1: So 40% of all your income, once you know your business expenses because every entrepreneur should know that then you'd be able to work backwards and work out well, how many clients do I need every month, based on these percentages and based on my current rate.
• 16:47
  Speaker 1: So it gives you the data rather than you having to make up things without any knowledge, right?
• 16:52
  Speaker 1: So the final structure you might create or we might create for Jack would be the bill payment structure.
• 16:59
  Speaker 1: So if you've got a pay date that he was getting the majority of his money in, then you could call your fixed supplies and organize bill due dates to align with your pay schedule.
• 17:08
  Speaker 1: So when the money comes in, the fixed bills all get paid and then you know that they're all covered.
• 17:12
  Speaker 1: And then he wouldn't be having these bills, you know, turning up on his doorstep or in his letterbox at odd random dates.
• 17:19
  Speaker 1: He could set up automatic payments for the bills that he knows come in and go out at the same time, at those exact same times each and every month.
• 17:28
  Speaker 1: The key is here, and I think you're getting the picture.
• 17:30
  Speaker 1: Here is what you need to do is you make a decision that this is what you're going to do.
• 17:35
  Speaker 1: You're going to put these structures in place and you commit to them, because, remember, any decision that has no commitment attached to it it's not a decision, it's just a preference.
• 17:44
  Speaker 1: So I hope you can see we've now put in a fundamental structure.
• 17:50
  Speaker 1: So it kind of takes the thinking out of it, it takes the stress out of it, because if he's not thinking about, oh my goodness, how am I going to pay these bills, he's not delving into his feelings of stress and anxiety about how he's going to make all that happen.
• 18:04
  Speaker 1: So we're actually, by changing the fundamental structure, we're taking all those things off the table right Now.
• 18:12
  Speaker 1: What I've been sharing with you is probably a long explanation of something that can actually naturally happen in a conversation in about five to 10 minutes, but what the end goal here is is we've changed the fundamental structure of how Jack acts and behaves around money, and by changing his fundamental structure, it changes everything, like I said, including his thinking.
• 18:33
  Speaker 1: And, let's face it, your thinking is all that matters, because now Jack has structures in place around money.
• 18:39
  Speaker 1: Now that he's got money in his accounts for his bills, he's got money tucked away for opportunities and emergencies, he's future planning for his retirement.
• 18:47
  Speaker 1: His daily spending has boundaries around it.
• 18:49
  Speaker 1: All his decision making around money is now simple and easy.
• 18:53
  Speaker 1: There's no stress and because there's no stress, he can focus his attention and energy on creating what he truly desires.
• 19:01
  Speaker 1: There's no leaking a leaking of energy by problem solving.
• 19:07
  Speaker 1: He's no longer operating in an oscillating money structure.
• 19:11
  Speaker 1: What we've done is we've installed a new money structure that automatically dissolves the previous one structure.
• 19:19
  Speaker 1: It's really important, it's super powerful and it's something that most people have no idea how to work with, and we need to.
• 19:29
  Speaker 1: You know you can apply this in your own business.
• 19:32
  Speaker 1: What structures are creating your current results?
• 19:35
  Speaker 1: Where are you experiencing oscillation or the entrepreneurial pendulum?
• 19:41
  Speaker 1: In your business or in your life?
• 19:42
  Speaker 1: And then, when you recognize that what needs to be reorganized at a structural level for you to automatically and unconsciously transform your results and therefore your current circumstances, you know.
• 19:57
  Speaker 1: If you'd like to know more information about structure and how it works, then shoot me a message.
• 20:01
  Speaker 1: You'll find my details in the show notes or at terriampalmercom.
• 20:05
  Speaker 1: Find my details in the show notes or at terriampalmercom.
• 20:08
  Speaker 1: So I hope that was helpful.
• 20:10
  Speaker 1: I hope that was useful and got you thinking about how structure really does determine how we live our lives.
• 20:15
  Speaker 1: I'll be honest, this episode probably went to a few places I wasn't expecting.
• 20:19
  Speaker 1: It's way more technical than I normally share.
• 20:22
  Speaker 1: But if you enjoyed it and got value out of it, then please share it with your friends and family, and just it.
• 20:25
  Speaker 1: Then please share it with your friends and family.
• 20:27
  Speaker 1: And just remember, structure determines behavior.
• 20:30
  Speaker 1: So when you help your friends and family or your coaching clients change their structures, you'll help them change their lives permanently.
• 20:38
  Speaker 1: So I'm Terri-Ann Palmpeak.
• 20:41
  Speaker 1: Thanks for joining me in today's episode all about structure, and I look forward to chatting with you again next week.