Latest / The Connected Mom / Letting Go of Perfectionism (encore episode)

Transcript

Letting Go of Perfectionism (encore episode) · The Connected Mom

• 0:00
  Welcome to the Connected Mom Podcast, where we have real conversations helping you to connect more deeply with God, more empathically with your fellow moms, and more intentionally with your child. I'm Becky Harling, your host, and we're excited to have you with us today. And I have with me today my amazing co host, Sarah Wildman. Hey, Sarah.
• 0:25
  Hi, Becky. It's so good to be here. And one of the things I love about our podcast is all of the diverse topics that we get to talk about. And so, I mean, we have done, uh, quite a range of things, but it's going to be super fun to dive into something called perfectionism. I wonder what that is.
• 0:47
  Motherhood.
• 0:48
  So there's my tea.
• 0:49
  So yeah.
• 0:49
  What exactly are we hoping to discuss today, Becky?
• 0:52
  Well, I think, Sarah, as you well know, because you're right in the thick of parenting, there's this pressure on today's mamas to do it right, to do the whole motherhood journey right. And I think sometimes mamas can get really discouraged, like, am I doing it right? Who defines what right is? And I just really want to do this well and then beating themselves up when they feel like they're not doing it right. So today's guest is m Alicia Michelle. Sorry, Alicia. Alicia Michelle. And she is get this, guys. She is, uh, a certified Mindset neuro coach. That makes you sound so smart. Um, she's a speaker and an award winning podcast host of the top ranked the Christian Mindset Coach podcast. Through her coaching and courses, alicia has equipped thousands of women with practical, brain, and biblically based tools to break free from the worry and exhaustion of perfectionism, people pleasing, and performance that comes from feeling never enough. She's a regular contributor to popular Christian sites such as Ibelive.com Crosswalk.com. Her podcast is featured as a weekly radio show on Khcbs Ah Uplifted, and she's currently writing her first traditionally published book with Baker House that will release in fall 2024. Well done. And you're going to learn more about Alicia as we move through this conversation. But Alicia, we are excited to have you here today, and I can't wait to dive into this topic.
• 2:41
  Yeah, thank you so much for having me on. I'm excited to talk about it. It's so important that we are honest and real about perfectionism as a mom.
• 2:49
  Yeah, absolutely. So let's start by having you tell us your story, because that's always a good place to start. I mean, obviously you developed a heart for this topic somewhere along the way. So what's your story?
• 3:02
  Oh, my gosh. That's kind of a huge question. Uh, my story is well, first of, I'm a mom of four. So just so you guys know, I am a mom right there in the trenches. Before we got on the air, we were talking about how I'm kind of in between Becky and Sarah in that I have four kids, but they're in their teen years. So 20, I guess technically not a teen, but 20, 1815 and eleven. So we're kind of in this in between stage of figuring out, wow, what is this about? Where we knew more about how to guide them and lead them when they were little, but now they're figuring out life and making decisions, and we're there in that different kind of coach role. So that is us as, uh, a family. We live in north county, san Diego, and like you were saying, I am a certified neuro coach, which just is a fancy way for saying, I am a mindset coach that helps women understand what are those subconscious brain patterns that are happening and how can we get out of those stuck patterns? I think a lot of us, especially around the issue of perfectionism, which this was my issue, too. We know the promises of god, we know who god says who we are, but we're like, well, why can't I believe it? What is going on? And usually in that case, there is some sort of a subconscious pattern that has been developed and reinforced, whether that's through early childhood, usually around the ages of nine to eleven or naturally, like nine to 13, is when those patterns can be formed. Or it's just something we've told ourselves over and over. And our very smart brains that god gave us have made this pattern that says, okay, this is what I need to do to feel good enough. This is what I need to do to feel loved. And we can carry all of that into mothering, into marriage, into these roles that we play. And we can feel like, all right, I know what I'm quote, supposed to do or supposed to believe about myself, but why can't I get to that? So I have the honor of being able to work with women to say, what is that soundtrack? And we do all kinds of exercises and different ways to get to figuring out, what is that soundtrack that's there? Why is it there? Why does it make sense that it's there? And what is god's truth about it? How can we replace it? And we use some different brain science tools, one of them called brain priming, to be able to do that and bring freedom. And I just love that I have the ability to use the truths of god, along with the science of god, together to be able to really figure out how can we break free from these patterns. Um, so that's the work that I get to do. I have struggled, um, my own life. I've struggled with anxiety since I was as far back as I can remember. I kind of always was an anxious kid. Um, and that turned into perfectionism pretty early. I was that kid who was always trying to achieve and accomplish, and that was how I felt good enough and kind of crashed and burned, um, after college, when realizing, all right, this is not enough. I still don't feel enough. I can never accomplish or be enough. It never felt enough. So definitely have struggled with that as a mom. And honestly, that's, uh, just another aspect of the journey I'm on now as a mom, as my kids have now gone into this different stage of how do I show up? As a, quote, not perfect, but the best mom that I can be in this stage. So lots of different things happening in that, but, uh, um, it's important, like we said, I think, to be honest with ourselves, that we can know the truth of God, but still feel like, why is it not sticking? And so that's the work that I.
• 6:32
  Get to do with women that is so interesting. Okay, so to be honest, Alicia, I had never heard of a Neuro coach.
• 6:40
  That's okay.
• 6:41
  How did you even know that this world existed? I mean, it seems like it's a great fit for you, but before we get into patterns, how did that come on your horizon?
• 6:49
  Yeah. All right, so, um, just kind of a very condensed version of this story, but in 2017, I had been working online with women, just kind of informally doing some informal coaching and courses and different writing Bible studies and different things online since about 2010. But in 2017, everything kind of came crashing down, and that was due to really not dealing with a lot of my own emotions needs, uh, to be perfect. I had pushed myself way beyond what I physically could take on, and it resulted in a huge medical crisis that put me in the hospital for ten days and left me in bed for over eight months. I wasn't able to do anything, wasn't able to take care of my family, wasn't able to homeschool my kids. Everything was gone. And God had to really, uh, get my attention and say, listen, you have done this to yourself. He said this, of course, in the most kind, loving way, but it's like you've not listened to the warnings I've given you, and it's not going to be a little hack for you to get out of this. You need to really understand what's motivating you. Why are you doing this? Why do you feel so compelled to only sleep three to 4 hours a night, continually, every night? Why do you feel like you always have to work? Why do you feel like you're never enough for your kids? Why what is going on? So that was this reckoning of figuring out, what is that about? Um, at this time, I was in the process of being certified as a coach through the Professional Christian Coaching Institute. But I also came across another certification for NeuroCoaching with a neuroscientist and, um, how she had taken her study and was now using it to equip other coaches with these brain science aspects of coaching so that they could use that to be able to help people, not just and I'm not at any way speaking badly about coaching, because coaching is obviously very powerful. And I am a coach. But to use that as another layer to be able to help people get transformation so as I began learning about that and realizing, wow, huh. That's been the issue that's kept me from being able to move forward is I could say all the right things on the outside, I could do all the hacks, I could try to fix it, but if I wasn't addressing what was underneath, I was going to be right back where I was. And so as I began to go through that journey myself, using tools like brain priming, it was transformative for me, and very quickly said, yeah, this is something that I definitely need. And, um, became certified as a neuro coach. And, yeah, I've just seen how it can bring freedom in a way that, um, because it really is using the science to literally rewire those neurons. Underneath that, of course, God's Word is always powerful. We're not saying God's word isn't powerful. It's kind of like if we have, um, a trumpet we're trying to play, and you've got a damper on that trumpet, it's not going to play as fully because there's something covering it, there's something blocking it. So if we can use that science to figure out what's there, rewire it and put in God's truth, oh, my gosh, how much more free can we be? So that's what I had experienced in my own life and was just so grateful to be able to use that now with other women to help them find freedom, too.
• 9:58
  I love that. It's so cool. And I love when science and God's Word come together, because God understands our brains better than anybody, right? But when science finally aligns with him and what he says about our brains, it's huge. So we all know that we have an enemy, right? The enemy seeks to kill, steal and destroy, and he lives to accuse us day and night, right? That's his full time job. However, as women, sometimes we're our own worst enemy. Sometimes we're accusing ourselves. And we have this inner critic. Whether we've picked up those messages from our childhood, most likely, or from media, we have this ideal image of what it's going to look like to be a mom. And so how do we begin to quiet that inner critic? What do we do?
• 11:00
  Alicia that is such an important question and topic because I think we often dismiss the reality of the inner critic. Maybe in the church we just say, well, just believe God's Word more, or just pray more. And of course, prayer is powerful. Of course. Kaima god's Word is like our ultimate goal for renewing our mind. Absolutely. And yet we have to confront in a loving way. And that's the key. We have to confront in a loving way that voice that's inside of us. And what I have seen to be most effective is to come to that voice when we hear it, start to notice it, first of all, because a lot of us don't even realize it's there. It's just such a part of our background we're not able to even notice. What am I really saying to myself? So first, the first obvious step is just to begin to notice what's there and what's being said, but to look at that voice and understand why she's there. So first of all, that voice is often our inner self, our brain's way of saying you are not safe or something bad may happen, you need to protect yourself. And so when we can recognize that voice as something that's trying to help us, almost like an overactive protective um mechanism, a helicopter mom to the extreme, right, just what about this? What about this? It's trying to keep us safe. That's the brain's number one job is to keep us alive, keep us safe. So if it's saying, well, what if this and what if that, it's trying to prevent pain from happening. If we can look at that voice like that, then it's a lot easier to work with that voice. So we can try to say, what are you trying to protect me from? What are you trying to keep me safe from? What is this about? And not letting that voice take over as obviously it's what we are following. But to say why are you here? What are you trying to protect me from? And then beginning to have compassion, to beginning to understand what that's about, maybe it is. For me, it was the perfectionism that I struggled with as a mom was I didn't want certain patterns that were in my childhood to be repeated. And so I was so afraid of that happening and of being on the other side of it and being like, oh, I made this mistake. Oh, uh, you should have known better. Like that was the voice always for me. So just saying, yeah, that happened. And it makes sense why you're trying to overcompensate in this area or not do in this area. It really begins to free that up and it also alerts us to the healing that might need to happen. So there needed to be some healing for me around some of the things that had happened to me. And so how can I find that healing? So it's really, I think, an invitation from God. When we hear that inner critic, it's an invitation for us to say there's something inside of us that's fearful, that's afraid, that needs protection. And God is right there. God is right there in that compassion. He's not accusing us saying you should just get over this, what's wrong with you? He's right there. He's right there with us and he wants to heal us. And so that's that invitation for him to come in and to offer a different explanation to that inner critic to say, yeah, that did happen to you and it is hard and I know you don't want that to happen again. And we also know that God is with us and he's going to walk us through this and he's going to show us what we need to do. So it's okay. I can let go of this. I can continue to listen to God and I can move forward so we can start to have those kind of conversations as we get healing through it.
• 14:31
  Mhm, yeah, that's awesome. So Alicia, if you can transport yourself back to maybe the preschool elementary years and there's so much going on, um, with that season, it's a beautiful season, but it's a very busy season, right? And I'm just like, precipice from that, like, m, I got sleep and I'm okay. But with that inner critic, I'm going to ask for a free, uh, coaching advice here. But what's maybe even the first step for Moms maybe in the thick of that season to recognize and see maybe what those inner critic thoughts might be. It's really hard to just sit and have this quiet time and think about maybe wrong thoughts. But do you have a practical tip, maybe just to start, um, even going there? Because I can imagine some people listening. Like, this is really interesting, but I don't think it applies to me. I'm just going to go do the laundry or whatever. Um, how do you see it working out in Moms? And how did you discover some of those inner critics?
• 15:44
  Um, I can so relate to that stage at that time. Had I just remembered that stage a lot, very vividly and we were homeschooling them.
• 15:56
  So.
• 15:59
  If you are a homeschool mom who's listening, you get that your entire world is your kids. You're home with them all day, it's just all day long. And you're thinking how in the world you might have a baby. I had a baby, I was nursing and a toddler and all of that. And you're like, how do I think about these deeper thoughts? I think it's kind of a similar question, which obviously you guys have experienced and can speak to this too. I think it's a similar question to how do we really connect with God in this time? It's the same kind of question of how can we notice and pay attention to what's going on inside of us. I think it's whether it is having some sort of time where you are in a journal or just writing things out or praying or going into the bathroom for five minutes, ten minutes, just kind of allowing yourself to notice what's happening in you, I think it's going to look different for every person and in every different season you're in. But that was something that if I could go back and change about my life as a young mom. I wish I had the tools to know that I still need to pay attention to those things in me, because if I don't, they're going to build, they're going to cause all kinds of drama, and I ended up paying the price for that. So I think whether there's lots of ways it can happen again, it can be journaling, it can be time with God. And just sometimes some of my times with God start off as journaling, and then God brings Bible verses to mind, and then I'm sharing and having this conversation with Him about that. And so I think it can be just part of that regular communion we have with God, a regular checking in, because we absolutely have to make sure that we're taking care of ourselves in that way and asking ourselves, what is our motivation for doing this? Why am I stuck in these things? I mean, we have to find ways to make that happen, no m matter how. And it just in some way, it needs to be a rhythm, a regular rhythm that we're putting into our life.
• 18:04
  Yeah. And I think along with that, I, um, think of moments when we were raising our kids in the baby and toddler years. The moments where a child was sick, and it wasn't like I could say, okay, hey, I'm just going to put you down over here and I'm going to spend an hour with God. So, for me, I was always spending time with God, but it was like an underneath quiet conversation. Uh, so it might be while I'm rocking that baby, and as I'm rocking that baby, I'm just praying, lord, show me what needs to change in me, or whatever. Or maybe it's when you're changing a diaper and a thought comes into your head and you're thinking, oh, man, why can't I keep this house clean? Maybe it's pausing in that moment and saying, okay, Lord, I realize that in 20 years, whether my house is clean today is not really going to matter. I used to have to have these check ins with myself while I was raising kids. I remember a season in my life where I thought to be a perfect mom meant you had a beautiful home cooked meal every night. You never fed your kids store bought cookies. You only fed them homemade cookies. You made their clothes. You did all the things. And I remember thinking at one point, this is ridiculous. And I remember my one daughter saying, I don't want you to make that dress for me. I just want you to sit and read me a story. I think based on that, I gave away my sewing machine, which I've never regretted so much.
• 19:44
  You know what?
• 19:44
  I'm done with it anyway. But there are all those crazy messages we get in our head. And one of the things that you mentioned that I'm so intrigued by, Alicia, uh, is, uh, brain priming? What in the world is brain priming? I kind of have this idea in my head that maybe it's like a mental workout, like, you take your brain to the gym or something. I don't know. What does this mean?
• 20:11
  Uh, yeah. So brain priming is really interesting in that it is a scientific process that has been used for dozens of years, probably since the late 80s, early 90s technically, in high performing athletes and musicians as a way to restructure thought patterns that are in the deeper parts of our mind, our subconscious mind, we'll just call it that. And what we use it for in the work that I do is to identify those patterns specifically around for identity, that the main questions that we tend to run into are, am m I loved? M am I enough? And am m I worthy? So understanding what are the messages that created those truths in our head? What are the truths? What is the soundtrack I'm saying about what I need to do to be loved? What do I need to do to be worthy? What are those soundtracks? And then through this process of brain priming, it's a 63 to 67 day process where we create a specific script that's custom to each person based on what that soundtrack is.
• 21:23
  Mhm.
• 21:25
  We'Re not reinforcing the concept because we don't want to reinforce what we used to believe or what we're currently believing. That's false. But we're identifying it enough in the way that we write it so that the brain recognizes what it is and it literally replaces that thought with the truth that we tell it to think. So we use God's word as to say, it's true that I am. Um, like if somebody is struggling with needing to perform to be good enough. It's true that God made me as a hard worker, and I'm grateful that I know that the work that I do for him brings him glory, but it never defines who I am. Again, I'm totally making this off the top of my head, but that kind of stuff. And so you're repeating that truth. Sometimes scriptures are in that we custom make them to each person. And we always ask at the end of creating a brain priming, or at least I do, is there anything else that your heart needs to hear from God about this issue to bring healing? What else needs to be in there? And what's literally happening from the brain science side is the idea. It's a very simple concept, but it's that this subconscious mind loves to make patterns, and it's great for making habits, things like that. Uh, so this is how it learns to streamline things. So we use that concept to see what is this pattern that's been created and how can we use that repetition to create a new pattern. Because what the brain does, again, is it says, uh, that part of the brain is not a moral part of the brain. It's not the logic prefrontal cortex. It's just going, okay, you tell me to get on a bike and to pedal like this, and I do this and I learn to ride a bike. And so it's just learned, okay, I work really hard in order to perform, in order to feel loved. So we're telling it a different message. You can look at the science. And what's so fascinating is that literally, when it comes to that trigger again, it starts to take a different path. It starts to literally pull away. And those old neurons are stripped away. They are no longer used, because when the brain doesn't use a neuron or a thought or a pattern, it's pulled away, it dies. And new patterns are built up so that when it comes to that trigger again, after a certain number of days, I won't get into some days. At some point in the process, the brain is choosing the old pattern and the new pattern 50% of the time. So they've seen that 63 to 67 days is the, quote, unquote, appropriate amount of time for all of the old neurons to be taken off. And the new highway, we can call it that to be built so that when that trigger comes again, there is this foundation that happens of change. And what's so amazing is that it's all happening in a way that you aren't really aware of when it's happening. So sometimes ladies will be like, well, how do I know it's working? Well, you'll kind of be in a similar situation again, and you'll notice, oh, that didn't bother me as much, or I think something different. Or I didn't automatically go to, oh, well, I just have to show up and do the thing and bring we have a different response, and it becomes so much more natural to step into that. And there's this freedom that comes. There's this confidence that comes, because it's like, I really do believe in my heart and my mind, this truth that God is telling me. And I'm not held back by these patterns that are inside there that are like weights on me. As I'm trying to walk along, those weights are gone. And my mind is now in harmony with what God says about me. So I'm brave, I'm bold, I'm ready to go and do the work he has for me. So that's the process of brain.
• 24:52
  It's almost like, um, declarations from the word of God over these former patterns so that you're replacing the lies with truth. Yes, it is.
• 25:03
  And it's a little more specific than that, um, because there's a certain way that we want to it's not a way we want to present it. I want to say it like that, but it's more than just maybe saying the same thing over and over, like, um, a scripture in that, because there might be something like we can say a scripture over and over, but we haven't identified. What is that pattern that's there that needs to be taken out first for that scripture to be in there? I don't know if that makes sense, but it does. So it's kind of this harmony. One of the courses that I have, um, it's a hybrid course of live teaching and coaching and, um, on demand teaching. It is called the Christian Mindset. Makeover and so we spend the first four weeks of the makeover really getting to what is that pattern, what is that about? Why does it make sense? What do we need to let go of? Uh, what is our responsibility, what's not our responsibility? How have we not trusted God? Why do we not feel safe with Him because of this or that? To get to week five where we can finally say, okay, we've gone through all these issues, from all these different examples and situations, what is that main message that we've heard and how can we change it? So it takes a lot of work to get to that. So I don't want to just say like, oh, well, it's just memorizing this or whatever, does that make sense? It takes some work to get to that point.
• 26:26
  I love that it's so active and we know that God's word is living inactive. So I love that you're marrying the two. So could you share a few scriptures? I'm sure it totally relates to what the person's pattern is and what you're speaking truth to, but maybe give us an example. You mentioned things like being loved or knowing you're enough or worthy, those sort of things. What are a few scriptures that you find yourself going back to quite a bit?
• 26:53
  Yeah, that's a great question. I think kind, uh, of we all have our own individual relationship with the scriptures and we prefer this scripture over that scripture or things speak to us for different reasons. So I don't necessarily have my go to three verses that I would say use this one or use that one. But I do as part of coaching and in the Mindset makeover, have something called 50 declarations. And they're all declarations based on different scriptures. And a lot of times this is a great jumping off point for ladies as they're putting together their brain priming, they're hearing a scripture. So I pulled it up here. There's a couple of, um, um, I am a child of God. Romans 816 I'm redeemed from the hand of the enemy. Psalm 107, verse two. I am saved by God's grace because of my faith, and this is a gift from God. Ephesians two eight. I am a new creature. My old life is gone and my new one has begun. Two Corinthians 517 I am safe in Christ. He rescued me because he delights in me. Psalm 1816 to 19. So we could keep going, but these are the kind of statements where, um, they're truths, they're basic truths. For someone to go, which of these really resonates with you? Um, like this one. Um, I'm having all of my needs met through Jesus by his glorious riches. Philippians 419. I'm set free by Jesus himself, so I am truly free. John 836. What are things that I need to hear that really resonate with me?
• 28:18
  Like, yeah.
• 28:18
  I need to know that all my needs are being met through Christ. I need to know that I'm set free. I need to know that I'm at peace with God because of what Christ has done. And allowing ourselves to meditate on those truths, um, is pivotal, of course. So those are great jumping off points that I give ladies to say, if you don't know what scriptures could be helpful, start with these and see if any of these resonate and begin to incorporate those.
• 28:42
  I love that. Hey, do you have a story for us, um, alicia of any woman? I mean, please give her a different name, uh, to protect her privacy, but just give us a story of somebody where you've seen this work.
• 28:57
  Oh, gosh, yeah. By God's grace, hundreds of women that I could speak about. But I'm going to share her real name because I will be sharing about her in the book and she is fine with that. Um, her name is Amy.
• 29:12
  HM.
• 29:12
  Amy was a woman that I worked with a couple of years ago and she really struggled with perfectionism and needing to do everything right. Um, type three on the enneagram, which I am as well.
• 29:26
  You're in good company because Sarah and I are as well. All right.
• 29:33
  Goodness gracious. Yeah. And she was so frustrated by this fact. There's this underlying feeling for her of anger. She just always felt like, why can't my kids listen to me? Why can't I get it right? Why can't I? When we first started working together, I thought, oh, Lord, I'm not sure if this is like, we're talking about her and her thoughts and her issues, but I don't know how to help her with her kids and the anger she's feeling towards them. That sounds like a whole nother issue. How do we deal with this? But we very quickly figured out that a lot of the anger and frustration she was feeling towards her kids was really a result of that. Her own inner critic just flailing her for like, you needed to do this right, and that's why they're not doing it. You, um, need to change. It's your fault why they're acting like this. Just all those messages that drive faster, work harder, you need to fix it now. And that whole mindset was really driving the show for her. And so once we began to see where that came from and why that was there and how it had sort of helped her for a long time because, you know, threes, that can kind of help us a little bit, but it really ultimately isn't the answer. It ultimately, God is not wanting us to rely on that, and it's not going to last in the fulfillment that we want for our lives. Um, anyway, so as we began to explore that and really bring compassion in compassion for why she developed that mindset, how God had made her and how she was working against this progress that he was trying to give her that freed her. And it was, again, so interesting because it wasn't like she just said, I'm going to stop being angry at my kids. It was this process that as we began brain priming, as we began we began uncovering, of course, the stuff that was there and then began brain priming. Slowly, slowly, it was just like, oh, my gosh, my son did this. And I was like, okay, we can work with that. Let's talk about it. Versus before it would have been, oh, uh, why can't I figure out how to fix you? Why can't I do this right? So it was this whole shift that happened in a way that was even outside of herself, the ramifications, which is what's so beautiful about this work. Of course, you guys know when we get this healing, man, how it impacts our kids, how it impacts our relationships, our ability to show up for God. And that was what we saw with her. And so it was like, wow, just so much freedom. Just the light that came back in her life, the light that came on in her. To be able to now use, obviously, somebody who knew how to work hard and do all the right things, but to use that from a healthy mindset, I mean, as a three, you guys get that it can be very destructive this way. We look at the world. But when we are doing it from that renewed thought process of like, I don't have to prove myself. I don't have to do these things. But now I'm doing it because of God's calling on my life. I'm serving from this way, from God's calling versus I need to prove it just radically changes how you show up. So, yeah, that was a great example of that.
• 32:42
  I love that we are, um, I think out of time. I feel like we could talk to you for several hours. This has been so interesting. Alicia. I love this. So before we close, tell our listeners, how can they get in touch with you? Where can they find your courses and all of that?
• 33:04
  Yeah, thank you. Uh, so you can reach out to me a couple of different ways. You can listen to the podcast. It's the Christian Mindset coach podcast with Alicia Michelle um, you can also go to the website, which is vibrantchristianliving.com, so vibrantchristianliving.com. There is a couple of free workshops that I have on the site. Um, the first one is Vibrantchristianliving.com Mind, and that is a free training to better understand this whole idea of how can we use brain science in the Bible together to break free from feeling like we're never enough? How can we feel in our head, in our heart? Sometimes women will say, how can I feel in my head, in my heart, these truths, what God says about me. That's a great training. So you ladies can check that out or you can find me on Instagram. It's at Aliciamichellecoach. So I would love to connect with anyone there and talk to you more about these issues.
• 33:53
  I love that, Alicia. And we will have those resources listed in the show notes so people can go to the show notes and find you. This has been so informative. I just love the work you're doing, and I love the idea of all these mamas being set free from all that self criticism. That's a beautiful thing. Um, because Jesus really wants us to enjoy the grace that he's given us, and he wants to work through us in order to help shape our kids. And so we hope that you have enjoyed this, uh, pod today, too.
• 34:34
  Oh, my gosh, it was so fun. You guys are so fun to talk to.
• 34:37
  We loved having you. And so I'm going to just pray for our listeners, and then we'll wrap up and close out. Lord Jesus. I just imagine all these mamas listening in, thinking, yes, I need this brain rewiring because I keep hearing this critical voice inside my head. And so right now, would you, through the power of your Holy Spirit, speak calm and wisdom to them? Would you help them to understand that they can figure out where those messages came from, and then they can replace them with the truth that you say about who they are and what you say about them through the word of God so that they can feel safe? And Lord, I just pray that you would bless Alicia in her work. I pray that you would bless the new book she has coming out. I pray, Father, that it would sell well and that many women's hearts and lives would be changed because she's been faithful to you. In Jesus name, amen. Hey, friends. Thanks for joining us for today's episode of the Connected Mom podcast, and we hope that you're going to join us again next week, where we'll continue to have another great conversation that will help you connect more deeply to God, more empathically with your fellow moms, and more intentionally with your child. Thanks for joining us today.