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Donald Drumpf Theatre: Paranoimia or Pardon Me Robert DeNiro · Donald Drumpf Theatre radio show

• 0:10
  SPEAKER_03: It's time again for Donald Drunk Theater No one knows what is up or down Jack or
• 0:18
  SPEAKER_03: white Legal or impeachable Everything is make-believe in Donald Drunk Theater So
• 0:24
  SPEAKER_03: let's pull the curtain back We are controlling transmission if we wish to make it
• 0:29
  SPEAKER_03: louder
• 0:30
  SPEAKER_03: We will bring up the body.
• 0:31
  SPEAKER_03: We can change the focus to a soft blur.
• 0:33
  SPEAKER_03: You're moving into a land of both shadow and substance, of things and ideas.
• 0:38
  SPEAKER_03: You've just crossed over into...
• 0:56
  SPEAKER_03: I hear it's fake news, but maybe it is, maybe it isn't.
• 1:00
  SPEAKER_03: I think it's fake news, okay?
• 1:01
  SPEAKER_03: Now, would I do that?
• 1:03
  SPEAKER_03: Absolutely.
• 1:04
  SPEAKER_03: The president of the United States has the authority to do what the president has the authority to do.
• 1:10
  SPEAKER_03: You will.
• 1:12
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I've declared myself as king.
• 1:14
  SPEAKER_03: I learned a lot from Richard Nixon.
• 1:16
  SPEAKER_03: Well, when the president does it, that means that it is not illegal.
• 1:19
  SPEAKER_03: I could cause panic much better than even you.
• 1:21
  SPEAKER_03: I could do much, I would make you look like a minor league player.
• 1:24
  SPEAKER_03: So, professor, would you say it's time for everyone to panic?
• 1:28
  SPEAKER_03: Yes, I would, Kent.
• 1:29
  SPEAKER_03: Welcome to the resistance.
• 1:30
  SPEAKER_03: I promise you for the remainder of the next four years, I will only speak to you in this tone of voice.
• 1:36
  SPEAKER_03: Still alive out there?
• 1:38
  SPEAKER_03: Good.
• 1:40
  SPEAKER_03: This is
• 1:41
  SPEAKER_03: Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-
• 2:10
  SPEAKER_03: What a way to talk about the President of America.
• 2:12
  SPEAKER_03: Me too.
• 2:36
  SPEAKER_03: Who was it said that observing the United States is like watching an epic movie?
• 2:41
  SPEAKER_03: Oscar Wilde?
• 2:42
  SPEAKER_01: Woody Allen?
• 2:43
  SPEAKER_03: Max Headroom.
• 2:47
  SPEAKER_03: Just think,
• 2:47
  SPEAKER_03: they've got an actor for a president,
• 2:49
  SPEAKER_03: economic advisors called projectionists,
• 2:52
  SPEAKER_03: even their defense strategy is named after a film,
• 2:55
  SPEAKER_03: Star Wars.
• 2:56
  SPEAKER_03: And of course,
• 2:57
  SPEAKER_03: everywhere in the world to them is just a theater of operations,
• 3:01
  SPEAKER_03: except when they're fighting in it.
• 3:03
  SPEAKER_03: And then it's a theater of war.
• 3:09
  SPEAKER_03: do with a few more
• 3:10
  SPEAKER_03: cow-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k
• 3:40
  SPEAKER_03: We're talking to people about some of President-elect Donald Trump's new cabinet
• 3:44
  SPEAKER_03: choices he's been making.
• 3:45
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, okay.
• 3:46
  SPEAKER_03: Totally.
• 3:47
  SPEAKER_03: What did you think of him naming Hans Gruber Secretary of Treasury?
• 3:53
  SPEAKER_03: You know, I guess it's lit.
• 3:57
  SPEAKER_03: Why is it so lit?
• 3:59
  SPEAKER_03: What do you like about Hans Gruber?
• 4:01
  SPEAKER_03: Hans Gruber?
• 4:02
  SPEAKER_03: Well, honestly, his name sounds lit.
• 4:05
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 4:08
  SPEAKER_03: President-elect Trump, of course, has vowed to increase production of oil and natural gas.
• 4:13
  SPEAKER_03: Do you support his choice of Jed Clampett to lead the Department of Energy?
• 4:17
  SPEAKER_03: I don't know much about the guy.
• 4:18
  SPEAKER_03: But what you've heard, do you support?
• 4:20
  SPEAKER_03: What I've heard, I would support it.
• 4:22
  SPEAKER_03: I think we need to get more domestic oil and gas here.
• 4:25
  SPEAKER_03: More Texas tea, black gold.
• 4:28
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 4:29
  SPEAKER_03: How did you feel about Trump naming former drug manufacturer Walter White as the
• 4:33
  SPEAKER_03: head of the Food and Drug Administration?
• 4:35
  SPEAKER_03: Do you support that?
• 4:37
  SPEAKER_03: I do support that, although I do not back any big farm agenda.
• 4:43
  SPEAKER_03: I am all for JFK Jr.
• 4:47
  SPEAKER_03: being in charge of some of our health-related FDA.
• 4:51
  SPEAKER_00: You're a fan of JFK Jr.?
• 4:52
  SPEAKER_00: I am, absolutely.
• 4:53
  SPEAKER_03: What do you like about JFK Jr.?
• 4:54
  SPEAKER_00: I love that he is healthy, that he is fit.
• 4:57
  SPEAKER_03: Would you like to wish JFK Jr.
• 4:59
  SPEAKER_03: good luck?
• 4:59
  SPEAKER_03: Look right in there and wish JFK Jr.
• 5:01
  SPEAKER_00: good luck.
• 5:01
  SPEAKER_00: JFK Jr., best of luck to you.
• 5:04
  SPEAKER_00: I absolutely cannot wait to eat clean in America.
• 5:08
  SPEAKER_03: Just don't hop on a plane with him.
• 5:11
  SPEAKER_00: I'll try.
• 5:12
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, put me on a plane with JFK Jr., we'd have a lot to talk about.
• 5:15
  SPEAKER_03: He's named Dr. Charles Manson Secretary of Health and Human Services.
• 5:19
  SPEAKER_03: Do you support that pick?
• 5:22
  SPEAKER_02: I don't think I've heard of that.
• 5:24
  SPEAKER_01: Not much on learning politics-wise and stuff.
• 5:28
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 5:28
  SPEAKER_01: Some stuff I don't follow, like, don't listen to.
• 5:31
  SPEAKER_03: Overall, would you say you support Charles Manson for the Secretary of Health and Human Services?
• 5:36
  SPEAKER_03: Sure, yeah.
• 5:38
  SPEAKER_03: Do you want to wish Charles Manson good luck on his new job?
• 5:40
  SPEAKER_03: Good luck, Charles Manson, on your new job.
• 5:43
  SPEAKER_03: We're talking to people about some of the cabinet picks President-elect Trump's
• 5:46
  SPEAKER_03: been making over the last couple of weeks.
• 5:50
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, no, don't get me started on him.
• 5:51
  SPEAKER_03: What did you think of his choice of Orenthal James Simpson to be the attorney general?
• 5:56
  SPEAKER_03: Did you support that choice?
• 5:58
  SPEAKER_01: I'm a 50-50.
• 5:59
  SPEAKER_03: You think his experience with crime and prosecution makes him qualified for the job?
• 6:05
  SPEAKER_03: He's got very few experience in it, but it does help.
• 6:08
  SPEAKER_03: So yes, good luck, Orenthal James Simpson.
• 6:12
  SPEAKER_03: How do you think about Trump appointing Lara Croft, the head of the CIA?
• 6:17
  SPEAKER_03: Man, only Lara Croft I know is Tomb Raider.
• 6:19
  SPEAKER_03: That's the one.
• 6:20
  SPEAKER_02: Well, I mean, I haven't seen her in so long, you know?
• 6:26
  SPEAKER_02: Has she been training for this?
• 6:28
  SPEAKER_02: Has she been working for it?
• 6:30
  SPEAKER_02: If she's been working for it, you know, and she's earned it, I'd love to see my women in power now.
• 6:35
  SPEAKER_02: Relax.
• 6:37
  SPEAKER_01: You're quite safe.
• 6:45
  SPEAKER_03: Am I dreaming?
• 6:46
  SPEAKER_03: No.
• 6:48
  SPEAKER_03: Where am I?
• 6:49
  SPEAKER_03: In bed.
• 6:50
  SPEAKER_03: What am I doing?
• 6:53
  SPEAKER_03: Talking to myself.
• 6:55
  SPEAKER_03: Look, I must have a star on my door.
• 6:57
  SPEAKER_03: Or better still.
• 6:59
  SPEAKER_03: Swing doors, huh?
• 7:00
  SPEAKER_03: Okay, doors.
• 7:01
  SPEAKER_03: Swing.
• 7:23
  SPEAKER_03: Now I know I'm dreaming.
• 7:26
  SPEAKER_03: How do I get to sleep?
• 7:31
  SPEAKER_03: We'll count those bars on the window.
• 7:36
  SPEAKER_03: One, two, three, sleep.
• 8:12
  SPEAKER_03: I can probably get to sleep.
• 8:14
  SPEAKER_02: Please let me sleep.
• 8:21
  SPEAKER_03: Poetry.
• 8:22
  SPEAKER_03: That'll work.
• 8:24
  SPEAKER_03: Come sweet slumber and shroud me in my purple cloak.
• 8:28
  SPEAKER_03: Doesn't even rhyme.
• 8:30
  SPEAKER_03: Is that my tease made?
• 8:33
  SPEAKER_01: Paranoid.
• 8:35
  SPEAKER_01: I can't stand it.
• 8:41
  Take care.
• 9:21
  SPEAKER_03: Happy Harry's Eye Club.
• 9:24
  SPEAKER_03: How do I get to sleep?
• 9:27
  SPEAKER_03: Trust me.
• 9:28
  SPEAKER_03: Trust me.
• 9:29
  SPEAKER_03: Trust me.
• 9:31
  SPEAKER_03: Trust me.
• 9:31
  SPEAKER_01: Trust me.
• 9:46
  SPEAKER_03: Our political parties are fighting amongst themselves.
• 9:49
  SPEAKER_03: The Democrats, for example, are still sniping back and forth over what went wrong.
• 9:52
  SPEAKER_03: Democrats are playing the blame game.
• 9:54
  SPEAKER_03: Some blaming Joe Biden for not getting out of the race early, others blaming their message.
• 9:58
  SPEAKER_03: Many Democrats blaming those on the far left of their party.
• 10:01
  SPEAKER_03: We need to take stock of why we are being held hostage to the far left.
• 10:06
  SPEAKER_03: Vermont Senator Bernie Sanders chided Democrats,
• 10:09
  SPEAKER_03: saying it shouldn't be a surprise that a party,
• 10:11
  SPEAKER_03: quote,
• 10:12
  SPEAKER_03: which has abandoned working class people,
• 10:14
  SPEAKER_03: would find that the working class has abandoned them.
• 10:17
  SPEAKER_01: Now, DNC chair, Jamie Harrison, he blasted that, calling it straight up BS.
• 10:21
  SPEAKER_01: This is not Joe Biden's fault.
• 10:23
  SPEAKER_01: It's not Kamala Harris's fault.
• 10:25
  SPEAKER_01: It's not Barack Obama's fault.
• 10:27
  SPEAKER_01: It is the fault of the Democratic Party in not knowing how to communicate effectively to voters.
• 10:33
  SPEAKER_03: Okay, but aren't they in charge of the Democratic Party?
• 10:36
  SPEAKER_03: So Democrats are bickering and pointing fingers.
• 10:39
  SPEAKER_03: Trump, on the other hand, has made it very clear that Republicans are all on the same page.
• 10:43
  SPEAKER_03: Our movement is built on love.
• 10:45
  SPEAKER_03: Where is the love?
• 10:48
  SPEAKER_03: I'm in love and you're in love.
• 10:49
  SPEAKER_03: We're all in love together.
• 10:50
  SPEAKER_03: We've done something that nobody's ever done.
• 10:52
  SPEAKER_03: I'm not in love.
• 10:54
  SPEAKER_03: The love, the love, the love in that room.
• 11:01
  SPEAKER_03: It was breathtaking.
• 11:02
  SPEAKER_03: It was like a love fest, an absolute love fest.
• 11:05
  SPEAKER_03: Nobody's ever had love like that.
• 11:07
  SPEAKER_03: That was love in the room.
• 11:09
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, my God.
• 11:09
  SPEAKER_03: He sounds like the uncle on Thanksgiving who accidentally mixed his red wine with his back pills.
• 11:15
  SPEAKER_03: I'm in love.
• 11:17
  SPEAKER_03: We're in love together.
• 11:18
  SPEAKER_03: Uncle Don, you're talking to a turkey.
• 11:20
  SPEAKER_03: Nobody believes in our love.
• 11:24
  SPEAKER_03: But there you go.
• 11:25
  SPEAKER_03: Republicans love each other.
• 11:26
  SPEAKER_03: And after winning the election, they must be basking in the warm embrace of that love.
• 11:31
  SPEAKER_01: His team has returned to the patterns of his first term in office with shouting matches,
• 11:36
  SPEAKER_00: expulsions from meetings and name calling.
• 11:39
  SPEAKER_00: There has been so much infighting and backstabbing.
• 11:42
  SPEAKER_00: It is the president's attorneys investigating one of his own.
• 11:45
  SPEAKER_00: Boris Epstein was trying to shake down people for access, for contracts, for money.
• 11:50
  SPEAKER_03: You do not do that under any circumstance, and believe me, there will be repercussions if somebody was.
• 11:55
  SPEAKER_03: Musk has been so aggressive in pushing his views about Trump's second term that
• 11:59
  SPEAKER_03: he's stepping on the toes of Trump's transition team.
• 12:02
  SPEAKER_03: Musk is also becoming a source of infighting the Trump transition team surrounding
• 12:06
  SPEAKER_03: the choice for Treasury Secretary.
• 12:09
  SPEAKER_03: It is now turning into an all-out knife fight between Trump's orbit as they try to
• 12:14
  SPEAKER_03: prove who has been the most loyal to him and who deserves a spot on his cabinet or
• 12:18
  SPEAKER_03: within his administration.
• 12:19
  SPEAKER_00: Epstein was involved in two shouting matches, including one involving Elon Musk.
• 12:25
  SPEAKER_00: Tell us more about the tension, the divisiveness there.
• 12:28
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah,
• 12:28
  SPEAKER_03: it's certainly feeling like a drama-filled Mar-a-Lago,
• 12:30
  SPEAKER_03: because both of these occurred at that beach resort.
• 12:32
  SPEAKER_03: One of them, again, between Elon Musk and Boris Epstein.
• 12:35
  SPEAKER_03: The second outburst or kind of confrontation that we learned about from several
• 12:40
  SPEAKER_03: witnesses at Mar-a-Lago was between Besant and Boris Epstein,
• 12:44
  SPEAKER_03: with Epstein shouting at Besant,
• 12:46
  SPEAKER_03: essentially saying he was going to sue him at some point.
• 12:49
  SPEAKER_03: shouting matches, knife fights, and top lieutenants trying to shake each other down for money.
• 12:53
  SPEAKER_03: You guys better watch out, or Martin Scorsese's gonna make a movie about this.
• 12:56
  SPEAKER_03: De Niro's gonna play Trump, but he's gonna win every Oscar.
• 13:00
  SPEAKER_03: Windmills.
• 13:02
  SPEAKER_03: Windmills.
• 13:03
  SPEAKER_03: Windmills cause cancer.
• 13:14
  SPEAKER_03: Donald Trump is the Hugh Hefner of the 90s.
• 13:16
  SPEAKER_03: Donald loves that perception.
• 13:18
  SPEAKER_03: I won, I won, I won.
• 13:19
  SPEAKER_03: He is still, you know, a year later standing in New York.
• 13:22
  SPEAKER_03: I won, I won, I won.
• 13:23
  SPEAKER_03: He wants to make sure everybody in America knows he won.
• 13:26
  SPEAKER_03: The real question is this.
• 13:28
  SPEAKER_03: Was all this legal?
• 13:30
  SPEAKER_03: Absolutely fucking not.
• 13:33
  SPEAKER_03: But we were making more money than we knew what to do with.
• 13:35
  SPEAKER_03: He said, I think Donald Trump is an artful liar.
• 13:38
  SPEAKER_03: I think he is a greedy, vicious, and arrogant man.
• 13:42
  SPEAKER_03: I don't know, is that supposed to be a compliment or not?
• 13:44
  SPEAKER_03: I'm not sure.
• 13:46
  SPEAKER_03: Meanwhile, the tariff of Nottingham, Donald Trump is making good on those tariffs he promised.
• 13:51
  SPEAKER_03: Trump said that on his first day in office, he's planning to issue an executive order.
• 13:56
  SPEAKER_03: We'll call for a 25% tax on all products that enter the country from Mexico and
• 14:01
  SPEAKER_03: Canada and a 10% additional tariff on products from China.
• 14:05
  SPEAKER_03: So now,
• 14:06
  SPEAKER_03: if you want to purchase a tie from the Donald J.
• 14:09
  SPEAKER_03: Trump collection,
• 14:10
  SPEAKER_03: you better get it immediately or it's going to cost an extra 10%.
• 14:13
  SPEAKER_03: Almost everyone who knows anything about economics believes these tariffs to be a terrible idea.
• 14:19
  SPEAKER_03: In 1930,
• 14:21
  SPEAKER_03: the Republican-controlled House of Representatives,
• 14:23
  SPEAKER_03: in an effort to alleviate the effects of the anyone,
• 14:27
  SPEAKER_03: anyone,
• 14:28
  SPEAKER_03: the Great Depression,
• 14:30
  SPEAKER_03: passed the anyone,
• 14:33
  SPEAKER_03: anyone,
• 14:34
  SPEAKER_03: the tariff bill,
• 14:36
  SPEAKER_03: the Hawley-Smoot Tariff Act,
• 14:39
  SPEAKER_03: which anyone raised or lowered
• 14:43
  SPEAKER_03: raised tariffs in an effort to collect more revenue for the federal government did
• 14:49
  SPEAKER_03: it work anyone anyone know the effects
• 14:53
  SPEAKER_03: It did not work, and the United States sank deeper into the Great Depression.
• 14:57
  SPEAKER_03: The problem is China and Canada and Mexico don't actually pay the tariffs.
• 15:02
  SPEAKER_03: The American company that imports their goods pays the tariff, which they, of course, pass down to us.
• 15:08
  SPEAKER_03: And then we have $40 avocados as a result.
• 15:11
  SPEAKER_03: This could send inflation through the roof.
• 15:13
  SPEAKER_03: Whoever would have guessed that the mail-order steak salesman who declared
• 15:16
  SPEAKER_03: bankruptcy six times would be so bad with money?
• 15:19
  SPEAKER_03: I don't know.
• 15:19
  SPEAKER_03: If the king could only see us now, he would be proud of us today.
• 15:24
  SPEAKER_03: They knew that now they'd run their own land.
• 15:29
  SPEAKER_03: But Donald Drumpf still vowed he'd rule them to the end.
• 15:34
  SPEAKER_03: Anything I say, do it my way now.
• 15:36
  SPEAKER_03: Anything I say, do it my way.
• 15:38
  SPEAKER_03: Don't you get to feeling independent?
• 15:41
  SPEAKER_03: Cause I'm gonna force you to obey.
• 15:44
  SPEAKER_03: he taxed their property he didn't give them any choice and back in Donald Drumpf he
• 15:52
  SPEAKER_03: didn't give them any voice that's called taxation without representation and it's
• 15:58
  SPEAKER_03: not fair but when the colonies complained the king said I don't care
• 16:04
  SPEAKER_03: Trump has been putting the finishing touches on his cabinet and staff.
• 16:08
  SPEAKER_03: He picked yet another Fox News correspondent.
• 16:11
  SPEAKER_03: This one will be Surgeon General, as this is Dr. Jeanette Neshawatt.
• 16:15
  SPEAKER_03: She actually has a lot of experience.
• 16:17
  SPEAKER_03: She was the lead on Surgeon General Hospital for years, so she should be...
• 16:21
  SPEAKER_03: With Matt Gaetz gone,
• 16:22
  SPEAKER_03: the top balloon on MAGA Mountain is Trump's pick to run the Department of Health
• 16:26
  SPEAKER_03: and Human Services,
• 16:27
  SPEAKER_03: Robert F.
• 16:28
  SPEAKER_03: Kennedy Jr.
• 16:29
  SPEAKER_03: RFK Cray has a lot of skeletons and whale carcasses in his closet,
• 16:34
  SPEAKER_03: including some interviews that have been getting new attention,
• 16:37
  SPEAKER_03: like this interview from June in which Mr.
• 16:40
  SPEAKER_03: Anti-Pharmaceutical has some interesting things to say about illegal drugs.
• 16:44
  SPEAKER_03: I did very, very poorly in school.
• 16:48
  SPEAKER_03: I started doing narcotics.
• 16:51
  SPEAKER_03: Then I went to the top of my class.
• 16:53
  SPEAKER_03: I couldn't sit still.
• 16:54
  SPEAKER_03: I just wanted to get in the woods.
• 16:55
  SPEAKER_03: And I was at the bottom of my class.
• 16:58
  SPEAKER_03: I started doing heroin.
• 16:59
  SPEAKER_03: I went to the top of my class.
• 17:03
  SPEAKER_03: Great lesson.
• 17:03
  SPEAKER_03: Remember, kids, stay in school and do drugs.
• 17:07
  SPEAKER_03: He believes in every drug except the ones that keep you alive.
• 17:11
  SPEAKER_03: Between RFK Jr.,
• 17:12
  SPEAKER_03: Tulsi Gabbard,
• 17:13
  SPEAKER_03: and Dr.
• 17:14
  SPEAKER_03: Oz,
• 17:14
  SPEAKER_03: Trump is filling out his team the way most people fill out Mad Libs,
• 17:18
  SPEAKER_03: with crazy choices.
• 17:20
  SPEAKER_03: Another incredibly controversial Trump administration nominee, Kash Patel.
• 17:25
  SPEAKER_03: He's been nominated to head the FBI.
• 17:27
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, what would be to worry about here?
• 17:29
  SPEAKER_03: Kash Patel,
• 17:31
  SPEAKER_03: and I don't say this lightly,
• 17:32
  SPEAKER_03: is the most dangerous nominee that we've seen yet to our democracy.
• 17:37
  SPEAKER_03: We're talking about somebody who has espoused QAnon conspiracy theories.
• 17:41
  SPEAKER_03: Saying that the 2020 election was stolen.
• 17:43
  SPEAKER_03: He has no other agenda but revenge.
• 17:47
  SPEAKER_03: Somebody who says he's going to throw judges in jail,
• 17:51
  SPEAKER_03: he's going to throw bureaucrats in jail,
• 17:54
  SPEAKER_03: he's gonna throw reporters in jail.
• 17:58
  SPEAKER_03: I didn't hear anything about comedians, so I... Look, none of this sounds good.
• 18:06
  SPEAKER_03: And while many presidents, including Democrats, have threatened to jail reporters, it's true,
• 18:11
  SPEAKER_03: They didn't do all of them.
• 18:14
  SPEAKER_03: Is there any reason why Patel should be confirmed?
• 18:18
  SPEAKER_03: My name is Kash Patel, and I have written the first ever Children's Russiagate book.
• 18:22
  SPEAKER_03: It's called The Plot Against the King.
• 18:25
  SPEAKER_03: No more king.
• 18:26
  SPEAKER_03: We're going to elect a president.
• 18:27
  SPEAKER_03: No more king.
• 18:28
  SPEAKER_03: He's going to do what the people want.
• 18:29
  SPEAKER_03: No more king.
• 18:30
  SPEAKER_03: We're going to run things our way.
• 18:32
  SPEAKER_03: No more king.
• 18:32
  SPEAKER_03: Nobody's going to tell us what to do.
• 18:35
  SPEAKER_03: I did not meet with Russia in a box.
• 18:40
  SPEAKER_03: I did not meet with Russia on Fox.
• 18:44
  SPEAKER_03: I did not meet them in Trump Tower.
• 18:48
  SPEAKER_03: I did not have a golden shower.
• 18:58
  SPEAKER_03: This nominee is going to be very controversial.
• 19:01
  SPEAKER_03: Republicans and Democrats should be examining how damaging this nomination could be
• 19:06
  SPEAKER_03: to American democracy.
• 19:07
  SPEAKER_03: What's at risk is the overall rule of law in the United States.
• 19:11
  SPEAKER_03: This is a really dangerous moment for our government and for the rule of law in America.
• 19:16
  SPEAKER_03: Faith in the rule of law is all that separates us from the otters.
• 19:24
  SPEAKER_03: The penguins, the apes, really the entire cast of Madagascar.
• 19:28
  SPEAKER_03: It's the only thing.
• 19:30
  SPEAKER_03: Faith in the rule of law.
• 19:32
  SPEAKER_03: Finally, Democrats have a moral perch from which they can judge without shame, hypocrisy, or nuance.
• 19:45
  SPEAKER_00: Breaking news, President Biden has issued a pardon for his son, Hunter Biden.
• 19:50
  SPEAKER_03: Mother...
• 19:55
  SPEAKER_03: We were so close.
• 20:00
  SPEAKER_03: But you know what?
• 20:01
  SPEAKER_03: That's fine.
• 20:02
  SPEAKER_03: It's good.
• 20:03
  SPEAKER_03: It's right.
• 20:03
  SPEAKER_03: It's his right.
• 20:05
  SPEAKER_03: He's an 82-year-old man.
• 20:06
  SPEAKER_03: Doesn't want to spend the rest of his life visiting his son in prison.
• 20:10
  SPEAKER_03: Republicans get away with this shit all the time.
• 20:12
  SPEAKER_03: I'm sure the pardon is a narrowly written, precisely drawn farewell note of compassion for a loved one.
• 20:21
  SPEAKER_02: The pardon sweeping,
• 20:23
  SPEAKER_02: covering offenses that Hunter Biden,
• 20:24
  SPEAKER_02: quote,
• 20:25
  SPEAKER_02: has committed or may have committed or taken part in over the past 11 years.
• 20:30
  SPEAKER_03: 11 years is a very specific and not rounded amount of time.
• 20:40
  SPEAKER_03: So, Hunter, I'll give you a pardon a few years, five years, 10 years.
• 20:44
  SPEAKER_03: It needs to be 11.
• 20:50
  SPEAKER_03: And if you would be so kind, make sure this upcoming New Year's Eve is also covered.
• 20:53
  SPEAKER_03: I didn't know pardons could cover crimes you may have committed.
• 21:04
  SPEAKER_03: I'm surprised Biden didn't include the phrase on Earth One or any.
• 21:11
  SPEAKER_03: of the Earth in the multiverse.
• 21:14
  SPEAKER_03: Now,
• 21:15
  SPEAKER_03: some would say that's what any loving father would do for their troubled son or daughter,
• 21:19
  SPEAKER_03: should they have the power.
• 21:20
  SPEAKER_03: But on Fox News, it was this love, in fact, that may have caused the problem in the first place.
• 21:26
  SPEAKER_00: My dad always told me, Ainsley, if you get arrested, don't call me.
• 21:29
  SPEAKER_00: I'm not your first phone call.
• 21:30
  SPEAKER_00: I'm leaving you in there.
• 21:32
  SPEAKER_03: Good night, sweetie.
• 21:41
  SPEAKER_03: Your dad always told you that?
• 21:43
  SPEAKER_03: Were you a degenerate?
• 21:46
  SPEAKER_03: Or was your dad De Niro?
• 21:50
  SPEAKER_03: No, listen to me.
• 21:51
  SPEAKER_03: No.
• 21:53
  SPEAKER_03: You get pinched.
• 21:54
  SPEAKER_03: I'm not your first phone call.
• 21:55
  SPEAKER_03: I don't know you.
• 21:57
  SPEAKER_03: There's 10 grand and a gun on the floorboards.
• 21:59
  SPEAKER_03: Good luck, kid.
• 22:01
  SPEAKER_03: And, by the way, not just Ainsley...
• 22:06
  SPEAKER_03: The rest of the Fox Cinematic Universe was no happier.
• 22:09
  SPEAKER_02: Not only the worst president in U.S.
• 22:11
  SPEAKER_02: history, but also the most corrupt.
• 22:13
  SPEAKER_03: This entire administration has been nothing but a sham.
• 22:16
  SPEAKER_03: He and his family are so full of slime that Nickelodeon is going to sue for trademark infringement.
• 22:22
  SPEAKER_00: you, Joe Biden.
• 22:24
  SPEAKER_03: Of course, no one was more outraged than America's judicial compass, Donald Seneca Trump.
• 22:30
  SPEAKER_00: President-elect Trump weighing in as well.
• 22:32
  SPEAKER_03: He says,
• 22:33
  SPEAKER_03: does the pardon given by Joe to Hunter include the January 6th hostages who have
• 22:37
  SPEAKER_03: now been in prison for years?
• 22:39
  SPEAKER_03: Such an abuse and miscarriage of justice.
• 22:42
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, you pardoned your son?
• 22:44
  SPEAKER_03: Well, what about the people who tried to help me overthrow the government?
• 22:48
  SPEAKER_03: That's kind of a leap there.
• 22:49
  SPEAKER_03: It's like going,
• 22:50
  SPEAKER_03: you know,
• 22:51
  SPEAKER_03: oh,
• 22:51
  SPEAKER_03: you're going to let the kids stay up to watch SNL,
• 22:54
  SPEAKER_03: but you're not even going to try to help me burn the neighbor's house down?
• 23:01
  SPEAKER_03: So obviously Republicans are gonna criticize,
• 23:05
  SPEAKER_03: but Biden did make this line of attack particularly available,
• 23:09
  SPEAKER_03: seeing as how he spent so long saying he wouldn't do it because of how much he
• 23:13
  SPEAKER_03: respects the system.
• 23:15
  SPEAKER_03: I'm not gonna do anything.
• 23:16
  SPEAKER_03: I said I'd abide by the jury decision.
• 23:18
  SPEAKER_03: I will do that and I will not pardon him.
• 23:21
  SPEAKER_03: Will you accept the jury's outcome, their verdict, no matter what it is?
• 23:25
  SPEAKER_03: Yes.
• 23:26
  SPEAKER_03: And have you ruled out a pardon for your son?
• 23:29
  SPEAKER_03: Yes.
• 23:29
  SPEAKER_03: But you know what,
• 23:30
  SPEAKER_03: ladies and gentlemen,
• 23:31
  SPEAKER_03: hypocrisy isn't illegal,
• 23:33
  SPEAKER_03: nor is it particularly unusual in politics.
• 23:35
  SPEAKER_03: It's not like he's ever gonna run again.
• 23:37
  SPEAKER_03: So why not take care of your kid?
• 23:39
  SPEAKER_03: Even if you said you weren't gonna, I respect it, I don't have a problem with it.
• 23:43
  SPEAKER_03: The problem is the rest of the Democrats made Biden's pledge to not pardon Hunter,
• 23:48
  SPEAKER_03: the foundation of their defense of America,
• 23:52
  SPEAKER_03: this grand experiment.
• 23:57
  SPEAKER_03: One political party remains committed to the rule of law and the other doesn't.
• 24:01
  SPEAKER_03: It's that simple.
• 24:02
  SPEAKER_03: Hunter Biden's not above the law.
• 24:03
  SPEAKER_03: No one is above the law.
• 24:04
  SPEAKER_03: Democrats stand for the rule of law.
• 24:06
  SPEAKER_02: We accept the outcome because that's how the rule of law works.
• 24:09
  SPEAKER_03: Because the justice system that convicted his only surviving son is the same
• 24:14
  SPEAKER_03: justice system he's vowed to protect.
• 24:16
  SPEAKER_03: And if that doesn't tell you who Joe Biden is, I don't really know what does.
• 24:20
  SPEAKER_03: I think I know what does.
• 24:25
  SPEAKER_03: I beg your pardon.
• 24:27
  SPEAKER_03: And now look at the dance Democrats have to do.
• 24:30
  SPEAKER_03: Be honest,
• 24:31
  SPEAKER_03: the only reason why they went after Hunter the way they did,
• 24:33
  SPEAKER_03: and I've talked to many federal prosecutors about this,
• 24:35
  SPEAKER_03: is because he's the president's son.
• 24:36
  SPEAKER_00: People have to remember,
• 24:38
  SPEAKER_00: the president has lost two children already,
• 24:39
  SPEAKER_00: and he does not need to lose another one to more political.
• 24:42
  SPEAKER_00: The, you know, crowing from Republicans.
• 24:46
  SPEAKER_00: But we're talking about,
• 24:46
  SPEAKER_00: you know,
• 24:47
  SPEAKER_03: Donald Trump is a convicted felon who literally pardoned his daughter's
• 24:54
  SPEAKER_03: father-in-law and just made him ambassador to France.
• 24:57
  SPEAKER_01: So for anyone that wants to clutch their pearls now because he decided that he was
• 25:01
  SPEAKER_01: going to pardon his son,
• 25:03
  SPEAKER_01: I would say take a look in the mirror.
• 25:05
  SPEAKER_03: Yes.
• 25:05
  SPEAKER_03: to everything that you guys were saying if you hadn't made hunter biden not
• 25:10
  SPEAKER_03: receiving a pardon the mason dixon line of morality between democrats and
• 25:14
  SPEAKER_03: republicans there's a big gap between the law is the only thing that separates us
• 25:19
  SPEAKER_03: from the animals and monkey threw shit at me first i had no choice this is what
• 25:24
  SPEAKER_03: biden's decision has done i beg your pardon look man the democrats made this case
• 25:31
  SPEAKER_03: an example of why americans should believe in our system
• 25:35
  SPEAKER_03: And it's hard.
• 25:35
  SPEAKER_03: Democrats have the tougher road of defending our institutions and systems as being
• 25:39
  SPEAKER_03: flawed but still valuable.
• 25:40
  SPEAKER_03: Republicans just run on blowing this shit up.
• 25:43
  SPEAKER_03: But at every turn,
• 25:44
  SPEAKER_03: Democrats keep getting caught creating a purity test for a system that they can't
• 25:48
  SPEAKER_03: seem to pass themselves.
• 25:50
  SPEAKER_03: When you saw the photograph of the top secret documents laid out on the floor at Mar-a-Lago,
• 25:57
  SPEAKER_03: what did you think to yourself?
• 25:58
  SPEAKER_03: How that could possibly happen?
• 26:02
  SPEAKER_03: How anyone could be that irresponsible?
• 26:05
  SPEAKER_03: Irresponsible.
• 26:06
  SPEAKER_03: The capital stewardship of our nation's most classified documents is foundational to the institutions.
• 26:10
  SPEAKER_03: It's why we are... What's that?
• 26:12
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, really?
• 26:13
  SPEAKER_03: In his f***ing garage.
• 26:16
  SPEAKER_03: next to his car parse away by the way my corvette's in a locked garage okay so it's
• 26:23
  SPEAKER_03: not like you're sitting out in the street it's totally different enemies of our
• 26:28
  SPEAKER_03: nation would have to get on their tippy toes to peer into the garage to see those
• 26:34
  SPEAKER_03: documents using some sort of image capture technology which i'm sure doesn't exist
• 26:40
  SPEAKER_03: spies would also be distracted by my sickest corvette
• 26:47
  SPEAKER_03: Let's not forget.
• 26:49
  SPEAKER_03: In contrast to Donald Trump,
• 26:50
  SPEAKER_03: the moral stand Biden took on Saudi Arabia after they murdered one of our journalists.
• 26:56
  SPEAKER_03: We were going to, in fact, make them pay the price and make them, in fact, the pariah that they are.
• 27:01
  SPEAKER_03: Khashoggi will not be forgotten.
• 27:03
  SPEAKER_03: Candidate Biden says this moral line must be drawn.
• 27:06
  SPEAKER_03: And President Biden?
• 27:08
  SPEAKER_03: Tonight, with one fist bump, a pariah no more.
• 27:12
  SPEAKER_03: It's just a fist bump.
• 27:13
  SPEAKER_03: I beg your pardon.
• 27:16
  SPEAKER_03: It's just a fist bump.
• 27:16
  SPEAKER_03: Come on, don't.
• 27:17
  SPEAKER_03: No, Trump would have probably done the whole, like, boom.
• 27:23
  SPEAKER_03: That is a moral line I won't cross.
• 27:24
  SPEAKER_03: I'll just, meep.
• 27:27
  SPEAKER_03: But he would have done the whole, boom.
• 27:31
  SPEAKER_03: And of course there's the border.
• 27:32
  SPEAKER_03: We're gonna restore our moral standing in the world and our historic role as a safe
• 27:37
  SPEAKER_03: haven for refugees and asylum seekers.
• 27:39
  SPEAKER_03: My lord, we've never made asylum seekers seek asylum outside the United States of America.
• 27:47
  SPEAKER_03: We've never done it tomorrow, what Trump is doing, until of course my poll numbers start to go down.
• 27:53
  SPEAKER_03: Today I'm announcing actions to bar migrants who cross our southern border
• 27:57
  SPEAKER_03: unlawfully from receiving asylum.
• 28:03
  SPEAKER_03: rules, loopholes and norms.
• 28:06
  SPEAKER_03: The distance between the systems Democrats say they are revering and the one that
• 28:10
  SPEAKER_03: they're using when they need to is why people think it's rigged.
• 28:14
  SPEAKER_03: Use the rules,
• 28:14
  SPEAKER_03: use the loopholes,
• 28:16
  SPEAKER_03: the norms,
• 28:16
  SPEAKER_03: but also use it to help the people,
• 28:19
  SPEAKER_03: not just those people related to you.
• 28:23
  SPEAKER_03: All of us are somebody's son or somebody's daughter.
• 28:29
  SPEAKER_03: And we all need that break too.