Latest / Drawn of History / Kevin Gates _ This Past Weekend w_ Theo Von _593(M4A_128K)

Transcript

Kevin Gates _ This Past Weekend w_ Theo Von _593(M4A_128K) · Drawn of History

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: We're getting into the final shows for the Return of
• 0:03
  Speaker 1: the Rat Tour. Gosh, this rat is almost fully returned.
• 0:08
  Speaker 1: July 9th will be in Philadelphia, Rochester, New York on
• 0:13
  Speaker 1: July 10th. Then we're in Detroit after that. Moving on,
• 0:17
  Speaker 1: we're in Los Angeles, Anaheim at the Honda Center and Oceanside, California.
• 0:24
  Speaker 1: You can get all your tickets at theovon.com slash T-O-U-R
• 0:30
  Speaker 1: And just thank you so much for your support. Today's
• 0:33
  Speaker 1: guest is a musician out of Baton Rouge, Louisiana. Baby,
• 0:37
  Speaker 1: out the boot. He crosses many genres like rap, R
• 0:41
  Speaker 1: & B, soul. He does it all. This dog, he
• 0:44
  Speaker 1: a 101. He a 101. He's got a new album
• 0:49
  Speaker 1: on the way, Luca Brasi 4. And he's heading out
• 0:53
  Speaker 1: on a huge tour this October. I'm grateful to sit down.
• 0:58
  Speaker 1: with my Louisiana amigo, Mr. Kevin Gates. It has tough, man.
• 1:22
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I got this from... I collect these kind of hits.
• 1:26
  Speaker 2: I bought two of them this time because... I put
• 1:30
  Speaker 2: dents in them. Really? Every time I travel.
• 1:33
  Speaker 1: What, just traveling and setting it somewhere?
• 1:35
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and they get smushed every time. Yeah.
• 1:38
  Speaker 1: Yeah, a hat is kind of hard to take care of.
• 1:39
  Speaker 1: That's the only thing I don't love about a hat. Like,
• 1:41
  Speaker 1: if I'm on a plane, I'll put it, and then
• 1:43
  Speaker 1: I'll take a nap. It'll fall off the seat or something.
• 1:45
  Speaker 2: Every time.
• 1:46
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you look sharp, man.
• 1:47
  Speaker 2: Thank you.
• 1:49
  Speaker 1: Recently, I started feeling in my own life, man, I
• 1:51
  Speaker 1: wish that I dressed up a little bit more. I
• 1:55
  Speaker 1: just wish that.
• 1:56
  Speaker 2: It's like how you do anything is how you do everything.
• 1:59
  Speaker 2: So I'm like, I prepare for something great to happen.
• 2:04
  Speaker 2: Every time I leave the house, I prepare for something
• 2:06
  Speaker 2: great to happen. Like even when I go to the gym,
• 2:09
  Speaker 2: I prepare for something great to happen.
• 2:11
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's an energy. I think I just started thinking that. Like, yeah,
• 2:15
  Speaker 1: I want to just, because then I want to be
• 2:17
  Speaker 1: excited about how I even look, you know? Like I never.
• 2:21
  Speaker 2: I mean, I only got. Well, I got multiple suits,
• 2:26
  Speaker 2: but I only got like four colors that I wear.
• 2:29
  Speaker 2: I got a gray suit. I got like three or
• 2:32
  Speaker 2: four of them. I got like three or four black suits.
• 2:35
  Speaker 2: I got like three or four navy suits. And I
• 2:38
  Speaker 2: got like three or four, they like different shades. So
• 2:41
  Speaker 2: I say like a tan and a darker tan.
• 2:45
  Speaker 1: You like them?
• 2:46
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I just love suits. I love them. They look fly.
• 2:50
  Speaker 1: You've always been pretty stylish, actually. I remember you and
• 2:52
  Speaker 1: I went to a Super Bowl together. I don't know
• 2:54
  Speaker 1: if you remember it or not.
• 2:55
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that was when I had the turtleneck on with
• 2:56
  Speaker 2: the slacks.
• 2:57
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's when I realized I was like, oh, Kevin's
• 2:59
  Speaker 1: doing something different. Because you hear rumors about Kevin. You
• 3:02
  Speaker 1: hear people like, Kevin, you know, Kevin out there.
• 3:05
  Speaker 2: I'm like Bigfoot.
• 3:05
  Speaker 1: Yeah, he's staring at the moon. Kevin out there, he,
• 3:08
  Speaker 1: you know, he hiding in the tree branches and stuff.
• 3:11
  Speaker 1: You hear a lot of rumors like that.
• 3:12
  Speaker 2: Trying to shoot my bow and arrow.
• 3:14
  Speaker 1: Yeah, he's out there babysitting bats or something.
• 3:17
  Speaker 2: Oh, excuse me. Shout out to Mike at... At Cabela's.
• 3:21
  Speaker 1: He's your guy?
• 3:22
  Speaker 2: Yeah, he's the one who dialed my bow and arrow
• 3:25
  Speaker 2: in for me. Like dialed it in, like set the
• 3:28
  Speaker 2: sights on it for me.
• 3:29
  Speaker 1: I haven't used one. But yeah, you hear everything about that.
• 3:32
  Speaker 1: Kevin Gates, he's out there. He breastfeeding pelicans and stuff
• 3:34
  Speaker 1: like that. You hear a lot of the mystery, right?
• 3:37
  Speaker 1: The lore. And I love the lore because it makes
• 3:40
  Speaker 1: things really, it's like advertising without you really doing anything
• 3:45
  Speaker 1: in a way, except being yourself. But I remember we
• 3:48
  Speaker 1: were on like a limo bus. They were taking us
• 3:50
  Speaker 1: to the Super Bowl. Everybody's on their phones or something
• 3:52
  Speaker 1: like that. Kevin just sitting there. Look, you look like
• 3:56
  Speaker 1: the happiest guy in the thing.
• 3:58
  Speaker 2: It's this thing I do called breath work. And I
• 4:03
  Speaker 2: think I said it one time in another interview, but
• 4:06
  Speaker 2: like I'm super into like Navy SEALs and shit. I
• 4:09
  Speaker 2: like watch. Don't, don't. Don't think I'm weird, but I am. Oh, yeah.
• 4:15
  Speaker 2: I just sit there and watch like videos or like
• 4:18
  Speaker 2: the training that they do. And I watch people take
• 4:20
  Speaker 2: the Navy SEAL test and fail and then try to
• 4:22
  Speaker 2: come back and do it. And I just watch that shit.
• 4:25
  Speaker 2: And I'll be watching like David Goggins and shit like that.
• 4:29
  Speaker 2: And it's like, you know, the first thing they teach
• 4:31
  Speaker 2: them how to do is breathe. So that's why I
• 4:34
  Speaker 2: be doing the box breathing. And it really helped with anxiety.
• 4:38
  Speaker 1: Explain it to me.
• 4:40
  Speaker 2: You inhale for four seconds. It's like you pretend like
• 4:43
  Speaker 2: you're looking at a box. You inhale for four seconds.
• 4:47
  Speaker 2: You hold it. You exhale for four seconds. And then
• 4:50
  Speaker 2: you hold it, and it keeps you super calm.
• 4:54
  Speaker 1: And does it get a little scary at certain points
• 4:56
  Speaker 1: or hard to remember? I guess you just get used
• 4:58
  Speaker 1: to the pattern.
• 5:00
  Speaker 2: If you ever get off, you just reconnect to your breath.
• 5:03
  Speaker 2: Because you're going to talk, you're going to interrupt yourself,
• 5:05
  Speaker 2: but then you reconnect to your breath and it keeps
• 5:08
  Speaker 2: you calm, like no anxiety.
• 5:10
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 5:11
  Speaker 1: Oh, yeah. I get rattled pretty easy.
• 5:13
  Speaker 2: And I'm an overthinker, like especially if I'm about to
• 5:17
  Speaker 2: go somewhere. Like I put unrealistic expectations on myself about
• 5:23
  Speaker 2: the outcome. Yeah. And we say that we, and I
• 5:26
  Speaker 2: might say that I'm going in there with a positive attitude, but.
• 5:29
  Speaker 1: Oh, I want to know everything. I want to know
• 5:32
  Speaker 1: how it's going to go. I want to be able to, like,
• 5:34
  Speaker 1: make sure I'm okay no matter what's going on.
• 5:36
  Speaker 2: I knew this shit was going to be cool because
• 5:38
  Speaker 2: I was already around you at the Super Bowl. I
• 5:40
  Speaker 2: was like, man, that dude crazy.
• 5:43
  Speaker 1: Oh, I don't think anybody could out-crazy you at this point, Kevin.
• 5:46
  Speaker 2: You done lost.
• 5:47
  Speaker 1: You lost everybody, man. It's going to be a little.
• 5:53
  Speaker 2: Hot.
• 5:54
  Speaker 1: Do we have any ice? We don't have any.
• 5:55
  Speaker 2: I don't need no ice. I'm good. Okay.
• 5:58
  Speaker 1: I was kind of nervous to talk to you because
• 6:00
  Speaker 1: I've known of you. I'm from Louisiana, so I've known
• 6:02
  Speaker 1: about you. Louisiana, bro. Even growing up. I remember the
• 6:05
  Speaker 1: first time I ever heard about you, this girl I
• 6:07
  Speaker 1: was talking to from Bogalusa was like, have you heard
• 6:09
  Speaker 1: of Kevin Gates? And I thought it was a subdivision.
• 6:13
  Speaker 1: It is.
• 6:14
  Speaker 2: It is? Really? No.
• 6:16
  Speaker 1: Oh, damn.
• 6:17
  Speaker 2: I didn't know. It is now.
• 6:18
  Speaker 1: Kevin Gates. Damn. I said, I don't know. I don't know.
• 6:23
  Speaker 1: I got a friend that lives in Meadowbrook or whatever,
• 6:25
  Speaker 1: but I've never been over there. And she's like, no,
• 6:27
  Speaker 1: you have to hear some of what this guy's doing.
• 6:30
  Speaker 1: And it was intense. The first time I listened to
• 6:32
  Speaker 1: your music, it reminded me the first time I saw UFC.
• 6:35
  Speaker 1: I was like, some of this stuff is a little
• 6:38
  Speaker 1: too hard for me. Because your stuff is very... Not
• 6:42
  Speaker 1: all of it, but some of it's graphic. It is real.
• 6:46
  Speaker 1: It's really raw. That's my perception of it. But so
• 6:50
  Speaker 1: that's how I got introduced to you, obviously, was just
• 6:51
  Speaker 1: from being in Louisiana. Do you miss those days in
• 6:55
  Speaker 1: Louisiana coming up? What was that like for you just
• 6:56
  Speaker 1: kind of coming up when you look back on it now?
• 6:59
  Speaker 2: I'm grateful for Louisiana because it made me everything that
• 7:02
  Speaker 2: I am right now. And the things that we cherish,
• 7:07
  Speaker 2: other people don't really cherish when you go other places.
• 7:10
  Speaker 2: And then with us having that Southern House Patel, they're like, yes, sir, no, sir.
• 7:14
  Speaker 2: Don't call me that. You make me feel old when
• 7:16
  Speaker 2: you go other places. But we used to catch whoopings
• 7:19
  Speaker 2: for not saying yes, sir, no, sir, yes, ma'am, no, ma'am. Yeah.
• 7:23
  Speaker 2: You know, I'd have been beat with extension cords and
• 7:26
  Speaker 2: whatever they could find.
• 7:27
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Oh, yeah.
• 7:28
  Speaker 2: Go get a branch out of the tree.
• 7:30
  Speaker 1: Go get something. Oh, dude, my mother would beat me
• 7:32
  Speaker 1: with my younger siblings. I'm like, God damn, both of
• 7:36
  Speaker 1: us getting it.
• 7:36
  Speaker 2: Grabbing by the ankle.
• 7:37
  Speaker 1: Yeah, like, damn, why? What was some of like, did
• 7:42
  Speaker 1: you ever, did you get to work with other artists?
• 7:44
  Speaker 1: I know people ask you that kind of stuff all
• 7:45
  Speaker 1: the time, but growing up, like when I was coming up,
• 7:47
  Speaker 1: they had like Mr. P, Master P, Mystical.
• 7:52
  Speaker 2: Me and Master P did a song together. And I
• 7:55
  Speaker 2: done done, I done worked with Wayne. We talking about
• 7:58
  Speaker 2: only Louisiana?
• 7:59
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm just talking about kind of that time in
• 8:01
  Speaker 1: the 90s.
• 8:01
  Speaker 2: I done worked with Lil Wayne. I done worked with
• 8:04
  Speaker 2: Master P. If you want to go currently, I done
• 8:08
  Speaker 2: worked with Fredo Bang, NBA Youngboy, Tick.
• 8:12
  Speaker 1: Oh, yeah, I heard that song you got with Youngboy.
• 8:14
  Speaker 1: I just heard it the other day.
• 8:16
  Speaker 2: I don't know who you say I am.
• 8:19
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 8:21
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 8:22
  Speaker 1: Yeah, they had, I'm trying to think, oh, Partners in Crime,
• 8:24
  Speaker 1: remember them?
• 8:25
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 8:25
  Speaker 1: It's that new Mr. Mina with that Papa Kago. Dude,
• 8:28
  Speaker 1: they had Partners in Crime, UNLV. Oh, was that UNLV?
• 8:31
  Speaker 1: Pump the, pump the party. UNLV. They had, I'm trying
• 8:35
  Speaker 1: to think of who else we love. Oh, Mystical was
• 8:37
  Speaker 1: the best. Mystical was great, bro.
• 8:38
  Speaker 2: I like that. Bitch, I want that boot camp flick. Danger! Yeah,
• 8:42
  Speaker 2: I like that. They keep bumping me again.
• 8:44
  Speaker 1: He kind of had his own thing, and he had
• 8:45
  Speaker 1: those horns in it.
• 8:46
  Speaker 2: Yeah, if we going that way, I like Fiend, Mr. Magic.
• 8:49
  Speaker 2: I liked everything that was coming out. You got to
• 8:53
  Speaker 2: say Soul to Slim. Oh, yeah. You got to say
• 8:57
  Speaker 2: Soldier Sliver.
• 8:58
  Speaker 1: Somebody didn't put me onto a lot of Soldier Sliver.
• 9:00
  Speaker 2: You got to say Stone and Lick. You got to
• 9:02
  Speaker 2: say the D-Boys. You got to say all of them.
• 9:05
  Speaker 1: I think some of that I didn't get put on then. Yeah.
• 9:07
  Speaker 1: But I loved it. That was a special time, I
• 9:10
  Speaker 1: felt like, in Louisiana because there were so many eyes
• 9:13
  Speaker 1: were focused on it. They had just so much sound
• 9:15
  Speaker 1: coming out of there.
• 9:16
  Speaker 2: Still do. Yeah. Like the sound different. Oh, yeah.
• 9:21
  Speaker 1: Well, things have changed so much, but at that time
• 9:23
  Speaker 1: I just felt like I don't know. There was something
• 9:26
  Speaker 1: really spectacular about it at that time.
• 9:28
  Speaker 2: We still got our own signature song. Louisiana, like, that's
• 9:32
  Speaker 2: where the flavor at. Oh, yeah. You get a container
• 9:36
  Speaker 2: of juice, and you sit it on the table. The
• 9:38
  Speaker 2: flavor falls to the bottom. You have to shake it
• 9:41
  Speaker 2: up for the flavor to go to the top.
• 9:42
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 9:43
  Speaker 2: The flavor always stay on the bottom. Yeah. The bottom
• 9:47
  Speaker 2: of the map. That's it.
• 9:48
  Speaker 1: The bottom of the map, man. The bottom of the boot. Yeah, dude,
• 9:52
  Speaker 1: I loved that time. That was a special time growing up, man.
• 9:55
  Speaker 1: What was the styles that y'all had? and our tan
• 9:57
  Speaker 1: art because in covington we had like jabot jeans polo
• 10:01
  Speaker 1: with the big horse remember people wear that sometimes he'll.
• 10:04
  Speaker 4: Figure polo crazy i want polo yeah i can see
• 10:06
  Speaker 4: that i want polo i can see that dead calves
• 10:09
  Speaker 4: collars jabot jabot's um I did Air Force Ones, but
• 10:14
  Speaker 4: my thing was the Adidas Stan Smiths.
• 10:16
  Speaker 2: Oh, yeah. I did the Adidas Stan Smiths.
• 10:19
  Speaker 1: I almost wore those today.
• 10:20
  Speaker 2: All day, I dream about stacks. Yeah.
• 10:24
  Speaker 1: Dude, that was a great time, bro. I mean, all
• 10:26
  Speaker 1: times are great, but that was a special time. It's
• 10:28
  Speaker 1: just something you and I, we both have a little
• 10:30
  Speaker 1: bit of similarity of that.
• 10:31
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I was born in 86, so.
• 10:33
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you're younger than me. Did you ever get to
• 10:36
  Speaker 1: see Mystical around the way or no?
• 10:37
  Speaker 2: Uh-uh. I seen him a few times when he was
• 10:39
  Speaker 2: out of prison, but I haven't seen him since then.
• 10:42
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah, I'm trying to think. I remember we'd go
• 10:45
  Speaker 1: to the rec center over at Baton Rouge.
• 10:47
  Speaker 2: By LSU? Yep.
• 10:48
  Speaker 1: And Master P and his, they would be in there
• 10:51
  Speaker 1: playing ball with, like, Silk. I don't know if C-Murder
• 10:55
  Speaker 1: might have been in and out of there, but they
• 10:56
  Speaker 1: definitely had Silk was in there.
• 10:58
  Speaker 2: Silk stay out here, though.
• 10:59
  Speaker 1: Does he? Yeah.
• 11:00
  Speaker 2: I be seeing him at 24 Outfitters.
• 11:03
  Speaker 1: Let's go.
• 11:04
  Speaker 2: Every now and then when I used to go there.
• 11:06
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 11:07
  Speaker 2: Just see him in there hooping, still hooping. Yeah.
• 11:10
  Speaker 1: That was a special time, though, man. That was a big, like,
• 11:12
  Speaker 1: explosion for, I felt like, for Louisiana rap. When you
• 11:17
  Speaker 1: think of, like, I know there was a lot of
• 11:19
  Speaker 1: hustling and stuff when you grew up. What was it like, like,
• 11:22
  Speaker 1: the hustle? Like, when people say I had to hustle
• 11:24
  Speaker 1: a lot when I was young, like, what does that
• 11:26
  Speaker 1: mean exactly?
• 11:28
  Speaker 2: Hustle? Yeah.
• 11:29
  Speaker 1: I know what it means. Like, you have to grind.
• 11:31
  Speaker 1: You got to stay busy. You got to figure things out.
• 11:32
  Speaker 2: You got to be locked in and you got to
• 11:34
  Speaker 2: be focused. Whatever your hustle is, you got to give
• 11:36
  Speaker 2: it 110%. Because being from Louisiana ain't really nothing to
• 11:40
  Speaker 2: do but die or go to jail. Yeah. So whatever
• 11:43
  Speaker 2: it is that you focus on, you got to be
• 11:44
  Speaker 2: locked in. Like Juve and I say, we snatched all
• 11:48
  Speaker 2: the hoes and bows and retentives. We didn't give a fuck.
• 11:51
  Speaker 2: We balled for three minutes. I might have said it backwards.
• 11:58
  Speaker 1: We can edit it into the correct format. What was
• 12:02
  Speaker 1: some of your hustles as a youngster? What kind of
• 12:04
  Speaker 1: hustling did you have to do personally?
• 12:06
  Speaker 2: I started off washing cars.
• 12:08
  Speaker 1: Yeah. What, just like in the yard, you'd put up
• 12:10
  Speaker 1: a sign or you'd get like a?
• 12:11
  Speaker 2: Uh-uh. I started off working at, they got a car
• 12:15
  Speaker 2: wash on Corset. And that was my first job, washing cars.
• 12:20
  Speaker 1: Like they had an inside and outside?
• 12:22
  Speaker 2: Yeah, inside and outside. I started on a vacuum. Yeah.
• 12:26
  Speaker 2: And then I started being like, once it come through
• 12:28
  Speaker 2: the washer, you dry it off. And that's how I
• 12:31
  Speaker 2: learned how to get the fender wells and the door
• 12:34
  Speaker 2: jams last. Oh, yeah? Why? Because that's where all the
• 12:37
  Speaker 2: dirt is. So if you're drying the car, you got
• 12:40
  Speaker 2: to dry the body of the car first. Then you
• 12:42
  Speaker 2: go back and get the door jams and the fender
• 12:45
  Speaker 2: wells last. That's where all the dirt is.
• 12:47
  Speaker 1: Because otherwise you're going to get the rag dirty and
• 12:48
  Speaker 1: put it everywhere else.
• 12:49
  Speaker 2: You're going to put dirt on it. Yeah. Yeah. And
• 12:53
  Speaker 2: then even when you wipe the rims, you hold the
• 12:55
  Speaker 2: tile and wipe the rims. You spray the tile off,
• 13:00
  Speaker 2: but you hold the tile and wipe the rims on
• 13:01
  Speaker 2: the inside. Clean them real good. Yeah. And the best thing,
• 13:05
  Speaker 2: the clean windows, I mean, the white windows with his newspaper. Oh, yeah.
• 13:08
  Speaker 2: No streaks.
• 13:10
  Speaker 1: Yeah, why was that, I wonder?
• 13:11
  Speaker 2: I don't know. I know it don't leave no streaks,
• 13:13
  Speaker 2: make it look good.
• 13:14
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that was nice. Dude, yeah, when I was growing up,
• 13:17
  Speaker 1: washing your car was one of the best things you
• 13:19
  Speaker 1: could do.
• 13:20
  Speaker 2: Of course.
• 13:21
  Speaker 1: Because you leave there, that thing felt beautiful, boy.
• 13:24
  Speaker 2: That was your office.
• 13:26
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 13:28
  Speaker 2: That was your escape. Ain't nothing like a little late
• 13:31
  Speaker 2: night ride.
• 13:32
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 13:32
  Speaker 2: Waffle house. Yeah. Uh-huh.
• 13:35
  Speaker 1: Dude, I remember exactly if I lit a cigarette at
• 13:38
  Speaker 1: this one point right when I take off out of work,
• 13:41
  Speaker 1: it would get me all the way home. I'd pull
• 13:43
  Speaker 1: up right into the driveway when that cigarette was done.
• 13:46
  Speaker 1: It was like this perfect kind of seance that I
• 13:49
  Speaker 1: had in my life. I love that.
• 13:50
  Speaker 2: That was your first car?
• 13:52
  Speaker 1: My first car was an 84 Ford Escort. That bitch
• 13:55
  Speaker 1: was chill.
• 13:55
  Speaker 2: My first car was a Nissan Central. Yeah.
• 13:58
  Speaker 1: Really? What year was it?
• 13:59
  Speaker 2: I don't know. The old one. The old, old one.
• 14:03
  Speaker 2: Pull one up.
• 14:04
  Speaker 1: Just pull up a.
• 14:06
  Speaker 2: The tan one.
• 14:10
  Speaker 1: Pull up a 1990. Let's see what they got. Let's
• 14:12
  Speaker 1: see if we close on it.
• 14:15
  Speaker 2: Nah, I was a little newer than that.
• 14:17
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's a little too old. Pull up a.
• 14:19
  Speaker 2: Pull up a 2001. That's it right there.
• 14:24
  Speaker 1: Oh, yeah, that bitch tasty, boy. God. And so your
• 14:30
  Speaker 1: first hustle was car washing. Did you get into stuff
• 14:32
  Speaker 1: in the streets? Did you get into stuff that was
• 14:33
  Speaker 1: kind of illegal type of stuff or no?
• 14:36
  Speaker 2: Yeah, a little bit. Yeah. Not nothing major, but a
• 14:38
  Speaker 2: little bit. I did a little something. Yeah.
• 14:41
  Speaker 1: Does it feel like if you grow up in certain
• 14:43
  Speaker 1: areas that you have to do that?
• 14:46
  Speaker 2: You're going to want to. They're the only people getting money. Right.
• 14:51
  Speaker 2: That's what a girl's like. Yeah. Oh, yeah.
• 14:55
  Speaker 1: The girl's like somebody got a little bit of cash.
• 14:57
  Speaker 2: Like, I remember telling Gilly and Willow, I was like, man,
• 15:01
  Speaker 2: when I was young, I remember all I wanted was
• 15:04
  Speaker 2: a car, some money, a girlfriend, and a gun.
• 15:08
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 15:08
  Speaker 2: Because that's all you see.
• 15:10
  Speaker 1: Oh, yeah.
• 15:11
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I got to pull out a bankroll. That was just,
• 15:14
  Speaker 2: you know.
• 15:15
  Speaker 1: Just to show it off.
• 15:16
  Speaker 2: Then they start calling it regs. Yeah. Yeah, regs. It
• 15:22
  Speaker 2: went from stags to regs.
• 15:25
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I think the name, do you think like, like
• 15:28
  Speaker 1: over the years you hear like things have changed, like
• 15:30
  Speaker 1: the hood, the block, the trenches, the mud, like there's
• 15:35
  Speaker 1: always kind of this evolution of the name, I feel like.
• 15:38
  Speaker 2: Man, we always, I call it the section.
• 15:41
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 15:41
  Speaker 2: They from the section. They from our section.
• 15:44
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 15:45
  Speaker 2: Are they from out the section? Yeah. Like if somebody,
• 15:49
  Speaker 2: if you from my section or you from my area
• 15:52
  Speaker 2: where I'm at, At the time, I'm like, oh, yeah,
• 15:54
  Speaker 2: he from my other section. Right. Or I'm going to
• 15:57
  Speaker 2: ask him, or I say, I'm just coming home from
• 15:59
  Speaker 2: jail and I see new faces. I'm like, who are they?
• 16:01
  Speaker 2: Are they from my other section? Yeah, that's such and
• 16:03
  Speaker 2: such people. That's such and such people. You know what
• 16:05
  Speaker 2: I'm saying? Yeah.
• 16:07
  Speaker 1: Do you feel like, do you have to live in fear?
• 16:09
  Speaker 1: Like in the section, do you feel like in a
• 16:11
  Speaker 1: black area, do you have to live in fear, did
• 16:13
  Speaker 1: it feel like?
• 16:14
  Speaker 2: No, because it's anything that you do every day is
• 16:18
  Speaker 2: going to feel regular to you. You know, anything that
• 16:22
  Speaker 2: is new to you, Say if it's new. If it's new,
• 16:25
  Speaker 2: you're going to be a little apprehensive. You know what
• 16:28
  Speaker 2: I'm saying? So you're going to have to sit back,
• 16:29
  Speaker 2: scope it out, and then you fall in. You're in
• 16:33
  Speaker 2: the mix now. But if you grew up in them
• 16:35
  Speaker 2: type of environments, it ain't going to feel like somewhere dangerous.
• 16:38
  Speaker 2: It's going to feel like home. Ah, yeah. So whatever,
• 16:41
  Speaker 2: go on. It just went on.
• 16:44
  Speaker 1: Right, you don't know any different.
• 16:44
  Speaker 2: But from the outside looking in, it's like, oh, God,
• 16:47
  Speaker 2: it's so horrible there. But when you in it, it's like,
• 16:51
  Speaker 2: man that's my people this is my auntie this is
• 16:53
  Speaker 2: my cousin.
• 16:54
  Speaker 1: This you know this is the culture yeah it's like
• 16:59
  Speaker 1: right a fist don't know it's in water really it's
• 17:00
  Speaker 1: family yeah do you think because you always hear over
• 17:04
  Speaker 1: the years you hear like we got to change these
• 17:06
  Speaker 1: areas right you hear like you have people we got
• 17:08
  Speaker 1: to make things safer we got to change these areas
• 17:12
  Speaker 1: um do you think that the people actually in those communities,
• 17:16
  Speaker 1: do you think they really want those communities to change
• 17:18
  Speaker 1: or that is?
• 17:19
  Speaker 2: If given the opportunity.
• 17:21
  Speaker 1: Does the question make any sense to you or no?
• 17:22
  Speaker 2: It make a lot. If given the opportunity, anybody would
• 17:26
  Speaker 2: do better. Right. People do. A man, yeah, this is
• 17:31
  Speaker 2: a wise quote. A man is what he know, not
• 17:34
  Speaker 2: what he's told. And I'll say it in like a vernacular.
• 17:38
  Speaker 2: A man is what he knows and not what he's told.
• 17:42
  Speaker 2: You are what you know, not what you're told. You
• 17:44
  Speaker 2: are what you do, not what you say you'll do.
• 17:47
  Speaker 2: So I could sit around and somebody could tell me, man,
• 17:49
  Speaker 2: you know what? You should change and you should do this.
• 17:52
  Speaker 2: And there's so many other opportunities. But if I've never
• 17:54
  Speaker 2: been exposed to these opportunities, all I know is what
• 17:57
  Speaker 2: I know. Right. And that's like, that's what recidivism, that's
• 18:01
  Speaker 2: people that repeat offenders, habitual offenders, because it's recidivism because
• 18:06
  Speaker 2: they don't know anything but what they know. And I
• 18:09
  Speaker 2: was like that. I was locked in, focused on one thing.
• 18:12
  Speaker 2: till I started experiencing other things. I broadened my horizon,
• 18:16
  Speaker 2: I opened my mind. Yeah.
• 18:18
  Speaker 1: Oh, I've watched a lot of interviews with you, man,
• 18:20
  Speaker 1: and a lot of it's been really fascinating, man. I
• 18:23
  Speaker 1: feel really thankful that you're here today to spend time.
• 18:25
  Speaker 2: I just took a.
• 18:27
  Speaker 1: What, an Ambien?
• 18:27
  Speaker 2: I just read about a... I just read about Laguna Beach, like...
• 18:34
  Speaker 2: This was in 2000 and... Maybe... 10 or 11, because
• 18:40
  Speaker 2: I read a lot of vampire novels and all of that.
• 18:43
  Speaker 1: Oh, damn, bro.
• 18:44
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I read a lot. I'm a record reader. So
• 18:49
  Speaker 2: this was way in 2000, maybe 10 or 11, that
• 18:51
  Speaker 2: I read a book. When I was reading the book,
• 18:53
  Speaker 2: they was talking about going to Laguna Beach. Last weekend,
• 18:57
  Speaker 2: I just took my son to Laguna Beach for his birthday.
• 18:59
  Speaker 2: So it was kind of like a bucket list. Not
• 19:03
  Speaker 2: a bucket list, but I was like, it'll be cool
• 19:05
  Speaker 2: to go there. Even like with Palm Springs, I read
• 19:08
  Speaker 2: about Palm Springs before, and I just passed through Palm Springs.
• 19:11
  Speaker 1: And they had vampires that were there?
• 19:12
  Speaker 2: And Rochelle Meade got this vampire academy, and one of
• 19:17
  Speaker 2: the schools that they went to was in Palm Springs. Damn, boy.
• 19:20
  Speaker 1: They some part of the older gay vampires probably over there.
• 19:23
  Speaker 2: I don't know, but it was so crazy that you
• 19:25
  Speaker 2: say that. It's because when you're given the opportunity to
• 19:29
  Speaker 2: do better, you will. Hmm. If you never given that opportunity,
• 19:33
  Speaker 2: you not gonna do better. We could say, yeah, you
• 19:35
  Speaker 2: just gotta overcome and stay focused and lock in. I
• 19:38
  Speaker 2: think me, what the beautiful thing about Kevin Gates is,
• 19:42
  Speaker 2: I have a very adventurous spirit and I'm going to
• 19:45
  Speaker 2: try something. Like, I love to try new things because
• 19:48
  Speaker 2: it's how you create new neuropaths. Like, even if you
• 19:53
  Speaker 2: did it and you didn't like it, you still had
• 19:55
  Speaker 2: the experience.
• 19:56
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 19:56
  Speaker 2: So you created, like, new neuropaths because if you do
• 19:58
  Speaker 2: the same thing every day, you become stagnant in the mind.
• 20:02
  Speaker 1: You just become a robot. You become a cul-de-sac to
• 20:05
  Speaker 1: your own cul-de-sac.
• 20:06
  Speaker 2: Yeah. You know? Like that's my biggest fear is being complacent.
• 20:10
  Speaker 2: I don't ever want to get stuck. So I did that.
• 20:13
  Speaker 2: I went to the beach and it was like, it
• 20:14
  Speaker 2: unlocked a few things for me. It was like, we
• 20:17
  Speaker 2: just took a road trip. It wasn't nothing but like
• 20:19
  Speaker 2: two hours.
• 20:20
  Speaker 1: But we did it.
• 20:21
  Speaker 2: We did it. Yeah.
• 20:22
  Speaker 1: We did something different.
• 20:23
  Speaker 2: We did something different. Yeah.
• 20:25
  Speaker 1: Cause I wonder sometimes like, cause you always like, you know,
• 20:27
  Speaker 1: like a lot of neighborhoods, especially if it's like impoverished neighborhoods,
• 20:31
  Speaker 1: you know, they say that type of thing.
• 20:32
  Speaker 2: Predominantly black.
• 20:33
  Speaker 1: And predominantly black neighborhoods. It's like, It's also those neighborhoods
• 20:37
  Speaker 1: that give a lot of the culture its flavor and
• 20:40
  Speaker 1: give it its story, right? Or some of its story, right?
• 20:44
  Speaker 1: People say, like, I came out of this. I came
• 20:46
  Speaker 1: through this, right? So sometimes I just wonder, like.
• 20:48
  Speaker 2: It's a blessing. It's the people that are blessed. I
• 20:53
  Speaker 2: say that because you're looking at people that grew up
• 20:57
  Speaker 2: in hardship and the roughest conditions ever. But we made
• 21:00
  Speaker 2: the best of what we had. And we didn't even
• 21:03
  Speaker 2: know we was poor until we saw rich people. Yeah.
• 21:06
  Speaker 2: It's like when you go to other countries, third world countries,
• 21:08
  Speaker 2: they don't even know they poor until they see people
• 21:10
  Speaker 2: with more than what they have. Like I was telling
• 21:13
  Speaker 2: somebody at one time, we just wanted a car. And
• 21:16
  Speaker 2: then once we saw the Bentley, we wanted the Bentley.
• 21:18
  Speaker 2: And then we wanted this and we wanted that because
• 21:20
  Speaker 2: we saw it. But to answer your question about the
• 21:23
  Speaker 2: people that come through that, I believe it's a rite
• 21:26
  Speaker 2: of passage. It's like the movie Leonidas. When the boy
• 21:34
  Speaker 2: went off into the wilderness and he came back a man, like,
• 21:39
  Speaker 2: we don't have no father figures or none of that
• 21:40
  Speaker 2: in the house. We come from mostly single mother. Your
• 21:44
  Speaker 2: mom had work. Your grandmother raised you. Things of that nature.
• 21:48
  Speaker 2: And we had to go out there and just find
• 21:50
  Speaker 2: our way. So it was like a rite of passage.
• 21:53
  Speaker 2: And the beautiful thing about me is I had beautiful
• 21:56
  Speaker 2: people in my life that kind of helped guide me
• 21:58
  Speaker 2: and lead me and steer me in the right direction. Yeah.
• 22:02
  Speaker 2: I made mistakes. I bumped my head. And I appreciate
• 22:05
  Speaker 2: every one of them because they made me this. But
• 22:08
  Speaker 2: to answer that question, I look at it more like
• 22:10
  Speaker 2: a rite of passage.
• 22:13
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• 22:19
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• 22:29
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• 22:30
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• 22:33
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• 22:36
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• 22:41
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• 23:31
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• 23:42
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• 24:25
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• 24:29
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• 25:02
  Speaker 2: But a lot of time when we be having like,
• 25:04
  Speaker 2: our body just really needs salt. Yeah. We be dehydrated.
• 25:09
  Speaker 1: You know, I notice that happens more often, I feel like.
• 25:11
  Speaker 1: And when I was a kid, you didn't hear anybody
• 25:12
  Speaker 1: talk about dehydration. And now I feel like people talk
• 25:14
  Speaker 1: about it every day.
• 25:15
  Speaker 2: Because we ate salt. We cooked with seasoning. Louisiana seasoning.
• 25:20
  Speaker 2: That's a good point.
• 25:21
  Speaker 1: People, yes.
• 25:22
  Speaker 2: You don't hear people down there talking about you dehydrated.
• 25:26
  Speaker 2: Eat a pickle. Fuck. Country boy can't survive.
• 25:29
  Speaker 1: Yeah, bro. That was it.
• 25:31
  Speaker 2: Country boy can't survive.
• 25:32
  Speaker 1: That's a good point. Everybody had gout, too. Everybody had
• 25:35
  Speaker 1: sugar pressure, gout. Salt, pressure, everything.
• 25:38
  Speaker 2: Country boy can't survive.
• 25:40
  Speaker 1: Everything. That was it. You were practicing Muslim?
• 25:45
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm a Muslim. Nice.
• 25:47
  Speaker 1: Nice to see you today.
• 25:49
  Speaker 2: Oh, like, you talking about what I got on?
• 25:51
  Speaker 1: No, I think you- Oh, no, this ain't got shit. No,
• 25:53
  Speaker 1: it doesn't look like that.
• 25:54
  Speaker 2: I'm not that kind of man.
• 25:55
  Speaker 1: No, I didn't know.
• 26:00
  Speaker 2: My bad. My bad. No, because I got the bow tie.
• 26:08
  Speaker 1: Oh, you thought that was part of.
• 26:12
  Speaker 2: The... I'm so not sorry. Please forgive me. Nuh-uh.
• 26:19
  Speaker 1: I didn't know what you mean because you thought it
• 26:20
  Speaker 1: because I thought the bow tie.
• 26:24
  Speaker 2: The irony. It's ironic that I got the bow tie on.
• 26:28
  Speaker 2: I'm not that kind, but I'm... Dave Chappelle said it.
• 26:34
  Speaker 2: I'm not good at it, but you know, I do
• 26:36
  Speaker 2: the best I can, you know?
• 26:39
  Speaker 1: No, I didn't know. I thought, no, I feel like, no. Yeah,
• 26:43
  Speaker 1: I didn't know what I thought. I just felt like, dang, Kevin. Yeah,
• 26:46
  Speaker 1: I thought you just seemed like a.
• 26:48
  Speaker 2: It's okay. Okay. It's okay.
• 26:52
  Speaker 1: Dang, that's hilarious.
• 26:52
  Speaker 2: It was just funny, because I had to... That's one
• 26:55
  Speaker 2: thing I, like... Like, I possess the ability to laugh
• 26:59
  Speaker 2: at myself, and once I developed the ability... to laugh
• 27:03
  Speaker 2: at myself, life became so much more easier.
• 27:06
  Speaker 1: Let's talk about that.
• 27:07
  Speaker 2: If I slip and fall, like, every time we step outside,
• 27:11
  Speaker 2: we're being judged. You know, if you went to school
• 27:15
  Speaker 2: and you had to, oh, God, I got to say it.
• 27:20
  Speaker 2: Not to get off subject. I used to hate free
• 27:22
  Speaker 2: dress day at school. Uniform saved my life. Really? Yeah.
• 27:27
  Speaker 1: Why, you couldn't handle it?
• 27:30
  Speaker 2: I ain't have no clothes. Oh, damn. Yeah.
• 27:34
  Speaker 1: You just wore the uniform again. They're like, Kevin.
• 27:36
  Speaker 2: Man, for a free dress day, I wore my mama.
• 27:38
  Speaker 2: I wore a pair of my mama jeans to middle
• 27:40
  Speaker 2: school in an old time of him figure shirt and
• 27:45
  Speaker 2: the same shoes I had been wearing to school the
• 27:47
  Speaker 2: whole time. Man, they teased me forever. Then, you know
• 27:50
  Speaker 2: how you got the faded part on the knees? Yeah.
• 27:52
  Speaker 2: It was like, why your knees white? Would you have
• 27:54
  Speaker 2: been on your knees? Nah, that's the style. Everybody got
• 27:57
  Speaker 2: distressed denim now. Yeah. So that was hard. That was
• 28:00
  Speaker 2: the worst. But I said that to say this. If
• 28:04
  Speaker 2: you possess the ability to laugh at yourself, you never
• 28:07
  Speaker 2: have to worry about being shamed of anything.
• 28:10
  Speaker 1: I've heard you talk about that before. In fact, man,
• 28:13
  Speaker 1: it's funny because one of the things.
• 28:15
  Speaker 2: That- It's okay to be human. You know what I'm saying?
• 28:17
  Speaker 1: Well, you know, most of my life, it was hard
• 28:19
  Speaker 1: for me to laugh at myself. A couple years ago,
• 28:21
  Speaker 1: it's so funny. A couple years ago, there was a
• 28:23
  Speaker 1: moment that happened. I don't remember what it was, but
• 28:27
  Speaker 1: I went. Theo, I just kind of laughed at myself
• 28:31
  Speaker 1: and said my name. My whole life, it had been
• 28:36
  Speaker 1: this internal thing that had been just judging me always.
• 28:40
  Speaker 1: And for the first time ever.
• 28:41
  Speaker 2: We are our worst critics.
• 28:43
  Speaker 1: But I just didn't realize how infected I'd been by
• 28:46
  Speaker 1: my own, by judgment of myself.
• 28:49
  Speaker 2: But we're taught that because when we come outside, we
• 28:52
  Speaker 2: judge by our peers. We judge by everything. If you
• 28:54
  Speaker 2: do this, if you do that. And then it's like,
• 28:56
  Speaker 2: you know what? I'm going to be the best human
• 28:59
  Speaker 2: I could be. Yeah. I don't care if I make mistakes.
• 29:03
  Speaker 2: I'm going to follow my heart. I don't care what
• 29:05
  Speaker 2: nobody think. I swear to God, I'm going to be
• 29:07
  Speaker 2: the best human I could be. And something else I
• 29:11
  Speaker 2: used to do, before I developed a greater sense of self-worth,
• 29:17
  Speaker 2: I would overcompensate. And that's still a form of seeking validation.
• 29:22
  Speaker 2: Like I would overextend and I would overextend myself as
• 29:28
  Speaker 2: far as just the person I am. Not to be liked.
• 29:31
  Speaker 2: I was doing this because this is what I really
• 29:34
  Speaker 2: wanted somebody to do for me. So I would overextend
• 29:38
  Speaker 2: and just overshare and overlove and over everything. I would
• 29:41
  Speaker 2: do it to the most. But this is the love
• 29:44
  Speaker 2: that I should have been giving myself.
• 29:46
  Speaker 1: Bro, there'll be times I'll text this over the past
• 29:50
  Speaker 1: few years. I noticed this happened for me. I'll text somebody. Hey, man,
• 29:53
  Speaker 1: just wanted to remind you, you're a great guy. And
• 29:56
  Speaker 1: I'm so proud of you.
• 29:57
  Speaker 2: I wish somebody would tell me that.
• 29:59
  Speaker 1: And as I'm typing it to them, tears will come
• 30:01
  Speaker 1: out of my face. And I didn't realize, and it's
• 30:04
  Speaker 1: a nice thing to say to them, and a lot
• 30:06
  Speaker 1: of times it's a person I'll have enough of a
• 30:07
  Speaker 1: connection with where, like, we share a lot of similar
• 30:10
  Speaker 1: experiences so we can, you know, we'll say that type
• 30:12
  Speaker 1: of thing to each other. But, man, sometimes as I'm
• 30:14
  Speaker 1: sending that, because really I just, like, that's what I
• 30:18
  Speaker 1: always needed, right?
• 30:19
  Speaker 2: The dude who did my guns on my hands, my
• 30:22
  Speaker 2: gun tattoos, his name, Trevon Spielman, but some people call
• 30:27
  Speaker 2: him Trevon or Trevon. I call him just T, my brother.
• 30:32
  Speaker 1: Where does he do it? He's out of Louisiana or where?
• 30:33
  Speaker 2: I'm about to tell you.
• 30:34
  Speaker 1: Okay, sorry.
• 30:35
  Speaker 2: He used to always make jokes. He used to always laugh.
• 30:38
  Speaker 2: He used to always check on everybody else. And he
• 30:43
  Speaker 2: sent me a text message. I got on the flight
• 30:46
  Speaker 2: and went to California. When my flight landed, the last
• 30:49
  Speaker 2: text message, he was like, I don't think I can
• 30:51
  Speaker 2: do this anymore. Then I found out he killed himself. Oh. So,
• 30:56
  Speaker 2: it's like oftentimes the people that's always helping everybody else, like,
• 31:02
  Speaker 2: it make you want to start checking on them. That's
• 31:04
  Speaker 2: why when I did it, and not to bring up
• 31:06
  Speaker 2: nothing with Drewski, but shout out to Drewski. I did
• 31:10
  Speaker 2: a little show where I was on there like a
• 31:11
  Speaker 2: blind date. And he was like, man, you too uptight.
• 31:15
  Speaker 2: And I'm like, I'm not. I just... Most of the time,
• 31:18
  Speaker 2: the people that make all the jokes, I check on
• 31:21
  Speaker 2: their well-being. Because that's how my brother was. He used
• 31:23
  Speaker 2: to always make jokes and make me laugh. And he'd
• 31:26
  Speaker 2: be doing my tattoos. And I'd be telling him about
• 31:28
  Speaker 2: everything I've been through. He was like my therapist. And
• 31:32
  Speaker 2: he even flew out to California one time just to
• 31:34
  Speaker 2: tattoo me. Stayed at my apartment and everything. And you
• 31:37
  Speaker 2: never know what people are going through internally. And that's
• 31:41
  Speaker 2: the reason I don't just... take people for granted, especially
• 31:46
  Speaker 2: people that's always making everybody else laugh.
• 31:48
  Speaker 1: So I'll laugh with you, but I'm also want to
• 31:50
  Speaker 1: be here with you to see what's going on.
• 31:51
  Speaker 2: Yeah, so I'm going to laugh with you, but when
• 31:55
  Speaker 2: we finish, I'm going to ask you, you sure everything okay?
• 31:59
  Speaker 2: Because if you need to talk, I'm here. And that's
• 32:02
  Speaker 2: just the type of person I am because he was
• 32:04
  Speaker 2: one of them people. He was super funny, everything. I
• 32:06
  Speaker 2: never would have thought he would have took his own life.
• 32:09
  Speaker 1: And that's what he just was dealing with too much pain?
• 32:13
  Speaker 2: Yeah, he was dealing with a lot. Yeah. He was
• 32:15
  Speaker 2: dealing with a lot. That's my brother. I love him.
• 32:18
  Speaker 1: Amen. Trevon?
• 32:19
  Speaker 2: His name is Trevon Spielman.
• 32:22
  Speaker 1: Trevon Spielman.
• 32:23
  Speaker 2: But some people call him Trevor. Yeah. And he's from Louisiana, too.
• 32:27
  Speaker 1: Trevon Spielman.
• 32:28
  Speaker 2: Well, good.
• 32:29
  Speaker 1: I'm glad we say his name today, man.
• 32:30
  Speaker 2: Yeah. It just made me think about that. The people
• 32:33
  Speaker 2: that give the most, we never ask them, do they
• 32:37
  Speaker 2: need anything? Yeah.
• 32:40
  Speaker 1: Yeah, man, a lot of my life, especially as an
• 32:43
  Speaker 1: adult in the past 10 years, eight years, really has
• 32:46
  Speaker 1: been having a journey with myself, right? I didn't even
• 32:51
  Speaker 1: know who I was. I don't even know if, honestly, bro,
• 32:53
  Speaker 1: I feel sometimes like I've only been alive for about
• 32:55
  Speaker 1: five or six years in some way. You too?
• 32:58
  Speaker 2: Yeah, you too.
• 33:00
  Speaker 1: Before that, I was alive, but I was just, and
• 33:03
  Speaker 1: I don't even know what was controlling me. I'm grateful
• 33:04
  Speaker 1: that God was giving me guidance.
• 33:06
  Speaker 2: You was alive, but you wasn't living. Man.
• 33:09
  Speaker 1: Well, I just didn't even know. The only way I
• 33:11
  Speaker 1: was experiencing the world was how you needed me to
• 33:14
  Speaker 1: experience it, you know, kind of type of thing. But
• 33:16
  Speaker 1: I wanted to say one more time just that, like, yeah,
• 33:19
  Speaker 1: there was a moment where I laughed at myself.
• 33:22
  Speaker 2: Oh, hey, I didn't mean to cut you off. Please
• 33:24
  Speaker 2: forgive me.
• 33:25
  Speaker 1: No, you didn't at all.
• 33:26
  Speaker 2: We just got lost.
• 33:27
  Speaker 1: No, it's important. This is good. You're totally forgiven. And, yeah,
• 33:31
  Speaker 1: I'm sorry for cutting you off, too. But, yeah, just
• 33:36
  Speaker 1: to be able to laugh at myself, bro. And then
• 33:39
  Speaker 1: part of me, I felt, man, my whole life, here
• 33:41
  Speaker 1: I am. And I won't even give my own self
• 33:45
  Speaker 1: a laugh. It's like, because not only am I talking,
• 33:48
  Speaker 1: but I'm listening to myself at the same time. And
• 33:51
  Speaker 1: I wouldn't even laugh. Every time I've just been like, man,
• 33:54
  Speaker 1: there's an old thing inside of me. You're not enough.
• 33:56
  Speaker 1: You've got to be perfect. Nobody's going to pay attention.
• 33:59
  Speaker 1: It's like just a constant system of judgment. And so, man,
• 34:03
  Speaker 1: to laugh at myself.
• 34:04
  Speaker 2: Is just crazy. My publicist. my publicist, her name Alvina.
• 34:09
  Speaker 2: She like, God give you what you need a lot
• 34:15
  Speaker 2: of times when you don't even know that you need it.
• 34:18
  Speaker 2: And me and her arguing, arguing, arguing, arguing. But she
• 34:21
  Speaker 2: always tell me like, you going to be great. That's
• 34:24
  Speaker 2: my life's mission, that you be great. So one of
• 34:28
  Speaker 2: the lessons, we have like a lesson every week. And
• 34:32
  Speaker 2: one of the lessons for one week, she was telling me,
• 34:34
  Speaker 2: give yourself grace. Because I'm super, I'm like you, I'm
• 34:37
  Speaker 2: super critical of myself. If I don't honor the commitments
• 34:41
  Speaker 2: I made to myself, I'm a bitch.
• 34:42
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 34:43
  Speaker 2: You know?
• 34:44
  Speaker 1: Yeah, definitely. And here's the crazy thing I would do, Kevin.
• 34:47
  Speaker 1: I would go for a run one day or do something,
• 34:50
  Speaker 1: and then I'd be like, we grinding every day. I'm
• 34:52
  Speaker 1: going to go run a million miles. Next week, I'm
• 34:55
  Speaker 1: running seven miles. And then the next day, I wouldn't
• 34:57
  Speaker 1: even go for a run, but I'd have built up
• 35:00
  Speaker 1: all of this steam in my head like I was
• 35:01
  Speaker 1: in the Olympics. And so then I'd let myself go.
• 35:04
  Speaker 1: my aspirations were so diabolical and ridiculous that, but when
• 35:11
  Speaker 1: I let myself down, I would let myself fall from
• 35:13
  Speaker 1: the heights of my aspirations, not even from, you just
• 35:16
  Speaker 1: took one run.
• 35:16
  Speaker 2: Not even from where you was at.
• 35:17
  Speaker 1: Yes, you just took one run and you just won
• 35:19
  Speaker 1: neighborhood over. And you got yourself at the Olympic trials
• 35:22
  Speaker 1: in Atlanta. But the shame I would feel would be
• 35:25
  Speaker 1: the fall from the Olympic trials and I only fucking went, damn,
• 35:29
  Speaker 1: probably 1,100 feet.
• 35:30
  Speaker 2: That's why everybody that tell me they want to get
• 35:33
  Speaker 2: into fitness, They'd be like, what you think I should
• 35:36
  Speaker 2: do first? I'd say baby steps. Baby steps. Take baby steps.
• 35:41
  Speaker 2: If you walk in the gym and walk out, you
• 35:43
  Speaker 2: still showed up. You did something that you wouldn't have
• 35:46
  Speaker 2: done yesterday. Maybe this time you might get on a
• 35:48
  Speaker 2: treadmill and walk for maybe two or three minutes. I
• 35:51
  Speaker 2: don't know. Who knows? Start drinking more water. Baby steps.
• 35:55
  Speaker 2: Like everything is baby steps. Yeah.
• 35:58
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I would never even give myself the grace of like,
• 36:00
  Speaker 1: let me have those babies, you know.
• 36:01
  Speaker 2: Then you know something else I used to do?
• 36:03
  Speaker 1: Hmm.
• 36:04
  Speaker 2: I used to compare myself to people that was taking
• 36:07
  Speaker 2: steroids and all of that. And I'm like, I want
• 36:09
  Speaker 2: my body to look like this. And I'm like, yeah.
• 36:13
  Speaker 2: And I used to watch them dudes say stuff like,
• 36:15
  Speaker 2: if you ain't got no six pack, you fat, homie.
• 36:18
  Speaker 2: And I was like, damn, I'm fat. So I had
• 36:22
  Speaker 2: unrealistic expectations. I'm just like you. And then I started
• 36:26
  Speaker 2: giving myself grace. And I'm like, yeah. I didn't even
• 36:29
  Speaker 2: come in it to look like that. I just wanted
• 36:31
  Speaker 2: my clothes to be able to fit good. I just
• 36:34
  Speaker 2: didn't want to be titty man anymore.
• 36:36
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah. He didn't want to have them nice titties
• 36:39
  Speaker 1: on him, boy.
• 36:39
  Speaker 2: Man, breast assist. I just didn't want to be titty
• 36:42
  Speaker 2: man anymore. And then you start comparing yourself to other
• 36:45
  Speaker 2: people and you lose. We lose ourselves in what we
• 36:49
  Speaker 2: really wanted. What was our goal? I just wanted a
• 36:51
  Speaker 2: bedroom body.
• 36:52
  Speaker 1: That's it. That's it.
• 36:54
  Speaker 2: That's all.
• 36:55
  Speaker 1: I don't want to look good in my pajamas.
• 36:57
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I just wanted a nice little bedroom, but now
• 37:00
  Speaker 2: all of a sudden I'm just like, man, I want
• 37:01
  Speaker 2: to be Hercules. I'm like, no.
• 37:03
  Speaker 1: Oh, yeah, I want to have muscles on the side
• 37:05
  Speaker 1: of my cock or whatever. You have them dudes, they
• 37:07
  Speaker 1: be flexing their cock. They got one dude, he can
• 37:09
  Speaker 1: flex his cock. I'm like, I don't got to see that.
• 37:12
  Speaker 2: You've been doing them dick lips, huh? Yeah, I've been
• 37:18
  Speaker 2: doing something, bro. Get that fishing string and put it
• 37:21
  Speaker 2: at the end of it with the little weight, the sinker.
• 37:24
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 37:25
  Speaker 2: And make it flick.
• 37:28
  Speaker 1: With that fishing sink or that little thing? Dang, man. No,
• 37:33
  Speaker 1: thank you for saying some of that, dude. Yeah, but
• 37:35
  Speaker 1: the first time I ever laughed at myself, I realized
• 37:38
  Speaker 1: how have I been treating myself this whole time. Horrible.
• 37:42
  Speaker 1: I've heard you talk a lot about things like that, man.
• 37:45
  Speaker 1: And some of the stuff you say, man, just thank
• 37:46
  Speaker 1: you for sharing. I know you're not a prophet or
• 37:48
  Speaker 1: anything like that, but just thank you for sharing honestly
• 37:50
  Speaker 1: because I think that's the greatest thing we can try
• 37:52
  Speaker 1: to do.
• 37:53
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm far from a prophet.
• 37:55
  Speaker 1: Yeah, but I feel like we can try to share honesty.
• 37:57
  Speaker 1: I'm profitable.
• 37:58
  Speaker 2: Yeah. I'm just out of profits.
• 38:01
  Speaker 1: What up?
• 38:02
  Speaker 2: The only reason I say that is because, you know,
• 38:04
  Speaker 2: when you hear about profits, they like these such perfect people. Yeah.
• 38:10
  Speaker 2: I ain't perfect. I'm going to make some mistakes today.
• 38:13
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Titty man on the loose today, baby.
• 38:18
  Speaker 2: They got a dude at the gym his name is Kevin.
• 38:20
  Speaker 2: When I walk in, he's like, hey. Not Titty Man anymore. Yeah.
• 38:26
  Speaker 1: Oh, he showed up, huh?
• 38:27
  Speaker 2: Yeah, like, because I did an interview and I was like.
• 38:30
  Speaker 1: Yeah, sorry for calling you Titty Man.
• 38:32
  Speaker 2: No, it's okay. It's no big deal. I'm just joking.
• 38:34
  Speaker 2: It's beautiful because that's where I came from. I was
• 38:37
  Speaker 2: Titty Man. Yeah. Like, I was holding a baby.
• 38:40
  Speaker 1: Oh, yeah.
• 38:40
  Speaker 2: And the baby tried to suck my titty. I had breasts.
• 38:43
  Speaker 2: Got it. And that was the most embarrassing moment for
• 38:45
  Speaker 2: me ever. I still talk about that to this day.
• 38:47
  Speaker 2: And somebody was like, no, you're running like. I said, yeah,
• 38:49
  Speaker 2: I had breasts. I was Titty Man.
• 38:51
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 38:51
  Speaker 2: So then they heard the interview. And when I went
• 38:53
  Speaker 2: to the gym, it was like, hey, you're not titty
• 38:56
  Speaker 2: man anymore. I was like.
• 38:58
  Speaker 1: Oh, I used to stay up and look at my buddy.
• 39:00
  Speaker 1: He had some tits on him, my buddy.
• 39:02
  Speaker 2: I was going to do that thing. I used to
• 39:04
  Speaker 2: think that I had, what is it called? Gynoglomastia? Whatever
• 39:10
  Speaker 2: it's called. Pull it up.
• 39:11
  Speaker 1: Gynoglomastia. See what it is.
• 39:13
  Speaker 2: Gynoglomastia. Where is it?
• 39:14
  Speaker 1: In the Middle East?
• 39:14
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 39:16
  Speaker 1: Oh, gynecomastia.
• 39:18
  Speaker 2: Whatever it is. I don't know how to pronounce the word.
• 39:19
  Speaker 2: I be hearing a lot of people say it. They
• 39:21
  Speaker 2: like gyno or whatever.
• 39:22
  Speaker 1: Gynecomastia, a condition where male breast tissue enlarges due to
• 39:26
  Speaker 1: an imbalance of estrogen and testosterone.
• 39:28
  Speaker 2: And i and they had this surgery where you go
• 39:30
  Speaker 2: get your your titty cut out and i was like
• 39:32
  Speaker 2: man i do that i'm tired of this shit and
• 39:35
  Speaker 2: i didn't know you got abs under here and when
• 39:39
  Speaker 2: you work the abs that's what lip like your ab
• 39:41
  Speaker 2: muscle don't just it go all the way up to
• 39:44
  Speaker 2: the pectoral and that's what lifted and then doing dips
• 39:47
  Speaker 2: and Doing abs, that's what made all of that disappear,
• 39:51
  Speaker 2: just lift.
• 39:52
  Speaker 1: Got that titty off. Yeah.
• 39:53
  Speaker 2: God.
• 39:55
  Speaker 1: Yeah, my buddy had them, and I used to stay
• 39:57
  Speaker 1: up at night, and he would have his shirt off,
• 39:59
  Speaker 1: and I'd look at them bitches, bro.
• 40:02
  Speaker 2: I hate that.
• 40:03
  Speaker 1: I liked it.
• 40:04
  Speaker 2: Like when I used to go to the YMCA. Oh, yeah.
• 40:07
  Speaker 1: Which one?
• 40:08
  Speaker 2: I used to go to the one on college. The
• 40:13
  Speaker 2: old one, though. Not the new.
• 40:14
  Speaker 1: The old one. Pull up that YMCA in Baton Rouge.
• 40:17
  Speaker 1: The one- There's one over there by the Walgreens.
• 40:20
  Speaker 2: Not on College, on Foster.
• 40:21
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 40:22
  Speaker 2: On Foster. The old one. On North Foster. I used
• 40:25
  Speaker 2: to go to that one. I'm talking about when I
• 40:27
  Speaker 2: used to come out of my shirt, they used to,
• 40:29
  Speaker 2: free Willie! Talking about the Will.
• 40:31
  Speaker 1: Oh, damn, yeah.
• 40:32
  Speaker 2: Oh, my God. Never in life.
• 40:34
  Speaker 1: I didn't know people were going through that. Yeah, that's A.C.
• 40:37
  Speaker 1: Lewis right there. That's a good YMCA. Free Willie out there.
• 40:41
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 40:42
  Speaker 1: Did you go to school over there ever?
• 40:43
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 40:44
  Speaker 1: Did you go to college over.
• 40:45
  Speaker 2: There, too? Something like that. I went to community college.
• 40:47
  Speaker 2: Did you?
• 40:48
  Speaker 1: Where you go, BRCC?
• 40:49
  Speaker 2: Of course.
• 40:50
  Speaker 1: Let's go.
• 40:51
  Speaker 2: Turn up.
• 40:51
  Speaker 1: My sister used to work over there at Cox Communications
• 40:53
  Speaker 1: over there, man.
• 40:54
  Speaker 2: I know where that's at.
• 40:55
  Speaker 1: Yeah, my brother went to Southern for a little while. Dang, bro,
• 40:58
  Speaker 1: that's wild. What were you studying over there?
• 41:00
  Speaker 2: Business. Yeah. Introduction to business.
• 41:03
  Speaker 1: And you graduated, bro.
• 41:04
  Speaker 2: I didn't graduate.
• 41:05
  Speaker 1: But overall, you did.
• 41:07
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I graduated.
• 41:08
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 41:08
  Speaker 2: Big facts, man. I'm a billion miles past.
• 41:12
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah. Did you get a degree? At some point
• 41:16
  Speaker 1: I saw that or I read that you got a
• 41:19
  Speaker 1: degree in jail, in prison.
• 41:22
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 41:22
  Speaker 1: Is that true?
• 41:23
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that's true. Wow.
• 41:24
  Speaker 1: What were the classes like in there and stuff? What
• 41:26
  Speaker 1: is it?
• 41:26
  Speaker 2: It wasn't no classes. You just test. I got credits
• 41:30
  Speaker 2: by testing.
• 41:31
  Speaker 1: Oh, so they don't have like a, do y'all do like,
• 41:34
  Speaker 1: I'm trying to think of what it's called. Do y'all
• 41:36
  Speaker 1: have like group projects or whatever?
• 41:39
  Speaker 2: No, you have an administrator that administer the tests. Oh, damn.
• 41:43
  Speaker 2: And you test. Whenever you ready to test, you test. Well,
• 41:46
  Speaker 2: you can't say whenever you ready to test. Like you
• 41:48
  Speaker 2: might test once a month or something like that. But
• 41:52
  Speaker 2: I had a little way that I was able to
• 41:54
  Speaker 2: keep testing. Shout out to them.
• 41:56
  Speaker 1: Yeah, shout out to them. But you don't have group projects.
• 42:01
  Speaker 1: I was wondering if you got a group project or something.
• 42:03
  Speaker 1: What if your group leader gets put in like in
• 42:04
  Speaker 1: a solitary confinement or whatever?
• 42:06
  Speaker 2: It wasn't like that. Yeah. It was not like that
• 42:09
  Speaker 2: in Louisiana prisons. It was like really every man for
• 42:12
  Speaker 2: they self.
• 42:13
  Speaker 1: So you take your test and then like was it?
• 42:15
  Speaker 2: You study the curriculum and then you go take a test.
• 42:19
  Speaker 2: You have an administrator that makes sure you don't cheat.
• 42:21
  Speaker 1: And did other people look down on you if you
• 42:23
  Speaker 1: was trying to study in there or no?
• 42:25
  Speaker 2: No. You're trying to get out the dorm. Yeah. Trying
• 42:30
  Speaker 2: to get out the door.
• 42:31
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I was just wondering if you had, like, a.
• 42:33
  Speaker 2: Now, when I went to prison in Chicago, when I...
• 42:37
  Speaker 2: What that's, Illinois? It was... I forgot. It's EMCC East Moline,
• 42:44
  Speaker 2: but I forgot the place in Illinois that it was. Now,
• 42:48
  Speaker 2: they had individual classrooms, like, on the campus.
• 42:52
  Speaker 1: Y'all would go to class.
• 42:53
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it was beautiful.
• 42:54
  Speaker 1: Dang.
• 42:55
  Speaker 2: That... That last bit I did, it changed my life completely.
• 43:01
  Speaker 2: That's how I got into yoga. Like, they offer programs
• 43:03
  Speaker 2: and everything.
• 43:04
  Speaker 1: At the prison?
• 43:05
  Speaker 2: At the prison. And they had weights. I say that
• 43:09
  Speaker 2: like I was lifting weights. Like, if you wanted to
• 43:14
  Speaker 2: be better, you could become better.
• 43:16
  Speaker 1: But, dude, that reminds me. You ever been at, like,
• 43:18
  Speaker 1: a hotel or motel? You'll be in the gym working out.
• 43:21
  Speaker 1: They have a family just come look at the gym
• 43:22
  Speaker 1: equipment and then just walk out? Like, they just come
• 43:25
  Speaker 1: take a tour?
• 43:25
  Speaker 2: That just happened to me in... You say at the gym?
• 43:28
  Speaker 1: Yeah, like you'll be in the gym.
• 43:29
  Speaker 2: That just happened to me at home. I was in
• 43:31
  Speaker 2: South Carolina. Yeah, I was in South Carolina working out
• 43:35
  Speaker 2: at a hotel in a gym. And they had people
• 43:38
  Speaker 2: passing by the gym, and they would look in the
• 43:40
  Speaker 2: gym and open the door and leave out. But they
• 43:43
  Speaker 2: was having like a fraternity reunion there.
• 43:46
  Speaker 1: A conference or something?
• 43:47
  Speaker 2: I forgot what fraternity it was, but it was like
• 43:50
  Speaker 2: from all over the country, they were there having some
• 43:54
  Speaker 2: kind of reunion.
• 43:54
  Speaker 1: Like Panhellenic or something like that maybe?
• 43:57
  Speaker 2: Nah, they was friends, they was fraternity, and they told
• 44:00
  Speaker 2: me they was in a fraternity. A few of them
• 44:02
  Speaker 2: came in there and talked to me.
• 44:03
  Speaker 1: Masons or something?
• 44:04
  Speaker 2: Nah, they wasn't masons. They was like college.
• 44:09
  Speaker 1: Oh, Frow Deltas or something?
• 44:10
  Speaker 2: Something like that.
• 44:11
  Speaker 1: Chopper Darts?
• 44:12
  Speaker 2: And they was like, yeah, bro, we down here for
• 44:15
  Speaker 2: some kind of get together. They having parties. Oh, they drinking. Yeah,
• 44:19
  Speaker 2: we big fans. I was like, yeah. Thank you.
• 44:21
  Speaker 1: Yeah, sometimes it's wild. I'll be in the gym and
• 44:23
  Speaker 1: people will come in and just look at the gym like, well,
• 44:26
  Speaker 1: look at this. If it ain't a gym, you know,
• 44:28
  Speaker 1: and then they just leave out.
• 44:29
  Speaker 2: At least they showed up.
• 44:30
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's a good point, huh? That's baby steps.
• 44:32
  Speaker 2: They showed up.
• 44:33
  Speaker 1: That's baby steps. Yeah, because I was just wondering if
• 44:36
  Speaker 1: you're in jail, do you have group projects or is
• 44:38
  Speaker 1: there like most likely to, you know, like that kind
• 44:41
  Speaker 1: of thing? Like, is it like a real, like most
• 44:43
  Speaker 1: likely to succeed or most likely to get out of
• 44:46
  Speaker 1: jail or whatever?
• 44:47
  Speaker 2: It's still individual-based learning, but you do earn good time
• 44:53
  Speaker 2: by going to school. I liked it. The way they
• 44:56
  Speaker 2: had it set up in Illinois, they had programs, and
• 44:59
  Speaker 2: you earned good time by going to school. It's like
• 45:01
  Speaker 2: that in Louisiana. In some facilities, you earn good time
• 45:04
  Speaker 2: by going to school, but the way they had it
• 45:08
  Speaker 2: set up in Illinois was different. They had real programs,
• 45:12
  Speaker 2: like real classrooms that you go to. They got some
• 45:15
  Speaker 2: facilities that offer that, but it's not the same.
• 45:18
  Speaker 1: So it was more organized over there.
• 45:20
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it was.
• 45:22
  Speaker 2: It was more, I'm going to say this. It was
• 45:26
  Speaker 2: based to help people. It was geared toward anti-recidivism. Recidivism
• 45:31
  Speaker 2: is repeat offenders. Anti-recidivism is people that go to jail
• 45:36
  Speaker 2: and become better and don't come back. It was geared
• 45:38
  Speaker 2: toward anti-recidivism. Like in Louisiana, it's not geared toward that.
• 45:42
  Speaker 2: It's geared toward, it's a revolving door. You're going to
• 45:46
  Speaker 2: come back. Right.
• 45:46
  Speaker 1: We'll see you soon. Yeah. Welcome back. That type of thing.
• 45:50
  Speaker 1: See you next time.
• 45:51
  Speaker 2: You know, like, You going in there.
• 45:53
  Speaker 1: We missed you.
• 45:54
  Speaker 2: This is one of the worst things, but it was
• 45:56
  Speaker 2: the most beautiful thing that ever happened, too, because I
• 45:59
  Speaker 2: needed this. They called me in. They had switched my PO.
• 46:04
  Speaker 2: They switched my PO. So they called me in. I
• 46:07
  Speaker 2: go in. I'm thinking I'm just going to piss. Yeah. Like,
• 46:10
  Speaker 2: you know, give an update on what's going on. Yeah,
• 46:13
  Speaker 2: put your hands behind your back. Took me to jail.
• 46:17
  Speaker 2: They said you traveled without. notifying anybody. I'm like, y'all
• 46:21
  Speaker 2: switch my P.O. I had been attempting to contact and
• 46:24
  Speaker 2: nobody had ever picked the phone up.
• 46:25
  Speaker 1: Bang. And where'd you go? You took a vacation?
• 46:28
  Speaker 2: No, I didn't take a vacation. I was working.
• 46:30
  Speaker 1: I won't say anything.
• 46:31
  Speaker 2: Yeah, in the same spot that the P.O. had already
• 46:35
  Speaker 2: approved travel for. And that's what made me start getting
• 46:38
  Speaker 2: copies of everything.
• 46:40
  Speaker 1: Right, so you got proof of what somebody said.
• 46:41
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I know. Can you sign it? Can I get
• 46:43
  Speaker 2: a travel for a bit? Can you sign it? And
• 46:45
  Speaker 2: I start getting copies. Can you make me a copy?
• 46:46
  Speaker 2: And I start keeping a folder and keeping copies. It
• 46:49
  Speaker 2: was beautiful, though. It made me be more organized.
• 46:51
  Speaker 1: Yeah, get some organization in your life and recognize, yeah,
• 46:53
  Speaker 1: you got to have proof of what's going on, even
• 46:55
  Speaker 1: for yourself, because you can't even rely on other people's
• 46:57
  Speaker 1: proof because they'll forget the proof. They'll alter the proof.
• 46:59
  Speaker 1: You don't even know sometimes.
• 47:01
  Speaker 2: I don't believe it. Sometimes people get so busy and
• 47:03
  Speaker 2: caught up with what they got going on. That's true.
• 47:05
  Speaker 2: That it's easy to forget. If you're dealing with 100
• 47:07
  Speaker 2: different people, you're not going to possibly remember little old
• 47:10
  Speaker 2: me until my name starts buzzing. Right.
• 47:13
  Speaker 1: Well, that's a good point, too, because that's an interesting way.
• 47:15
  Speaker 1: Sometimes I'll think this is the way that I'll think.
• 47:17
  Speaker 1: I'll think, oh, they're doing that on purpose to me,
• 47:20
  Speaker 1: as opposed to what you just said. It sounds like
• 47:22
  Speaker 1: adversity builds character. But people got a million things going on.
• 47:25
  Speaker 1: They're not thinking. They're just doing their shit.
• 47:27
  Speaker 2: They say never suspect malice of what could be mistaken
• 47:31
  Speaker 2: for incompetence.
• 47:32
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 47:33
  Speaker 2: Never take as malice for what could be misinterpreted as incompetence.
• 47:37
  Speaker 1: And it usually is this. Usually it's just kind of incompetence.
• 47:39
  Speaker 2: People don't just go out of their way to do.
• 47:42
  Speaker 2: fucked up shit to you they just be so preoccupied
• 47:45
  Speaker 2: with what they got going on they don't even know
• 47:47
  Speaker 2: that this is what they're doing yeah until made aware.
• 47:51
  Speaker 1: But see there were times in my head like these
• 47:53
  Speaker 1: motherfuckers that's how they treat you but it's not anything
• 47:55
  Speaker 1: like that you know but i would take that.
• 47:57
  Speaker 2: On we're gonna automatically you know that's we're gonna automatically
• 48:00
  Speaker 2: plex i still plex sometimes like have a con develop
• 48:03
  Speaker 2: a complex about feeling like i'm being you know, mishandled
• 48:09
  Speaker 2: and things of that nature. But I don't even look
• 48:10
  Speaker 2: at it like that that should be so petty, because
• 48:12
  Speaker 2: I look at it now like it's an invitation for
• 48:15
  Speaker 2: me to lower my frequency. I stay.
• 48:18
  Speaker 1: What is something you miss about prison?
• 48:20
  Speaker 2: I don't miss nothing about prison.
• 48:22
  Speaker 1: Even something little?
• 48:24
  Speaker 2: No. I don't miss nothing about prison.
• 48:29
  Speaker 1: So there's nothing in it. What about even just getting
• 48:31
  Speaker 1: some rest every now and then? Was it like that
• 48:33
  Speaker 1: or no?
• 48:33
  Speaker 2: I can get rest out here. I need to go
• 48:35
  Speaker 2: to prison for to get rest.
• 48:36
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you're right. You're right, man.
• 48:39
  Speaker 2: I'm trying to, yeah. What'd I miss?
• 48:40
  Speaker 1: Now I'm going to read ads for some of the prisons.
• 48:42
  Speaker 2: Somebody coming up making sure you're in compliance. Bed made up,
• 48:47
  Speaker 2: all that. I ain't got time for that shit. I
• 48:49
  Speaker 2: do that on my own anyway.
• 48:50
  Speaker 1: And what about a cellmate at night? Like, do people
• 48:52
  Speaker 1: say goodnight to each other or people just quietly go
• 48:54
  Speaker 1: to sleep?
• 48:56
  Speaker 2: It depends on if you and your cell are cool.
• 48:59
  Speaker 2: If you got a cell and y'all cool like that,
• 49:02
  Speaker 2: you know, but with me, Anytime I leave, any set
• 49:07
  Speaker 2: I have, they gonna always, man, I'm gonna miss you, bro.
• 49:09
  Speaker 2: Because I just, I keep it going. I run eps
• 49:12
  Speaker 2: and everything. And when I say run eps, that means
• 49:16
  Speaker 2: like I'm running an episode. Like we talking about shit.
• 49:20
  Speaker 2: But it might go, when I first get in the cell,
• 49:22
  Speaker 2: it might go by 90 days. My cell is going
• 49:25
  Speaker 2: to always ask me the same thing. Hey, you sleep
• 49:29
  Speaker 2: all day and you be up all night. You don't
• 49:31
  Speaker 2: watch TV and you don't get on the phone. So
• 49:34
  Speaker 2: I be reading. I just read. I read books. I
• 49:39
  Speaker 2: got stacks of books. Yeah. Then I don't even go
• 49:43
  Speaker 2: to child. So, like, say if you indigent. Indigent means
• 49:47
  Speaker 2: don't nobody send you no money. I'm going to ask you.
• 49:49
  Speaker 2: You got family out there? They love you? They send
• 49:52
  Speaker 2: you money? You going to tell me no? Then what
• 49:54
  Speaker 2: I'm going to do? I'm going to put $ 100 on
• 49:56
  Speaker 2: your books. You going to give me $ 80 worth of shit,
• 49:59
  Speaker 2: and you going to just keep the $ 20 for you. Yeah.
• 50:02
  Speaker 1: That's business.
• 50:03
  Speaker 2: Yeah. So, you know, you eating and I'm eating because
• 50:06
  Speaker 2: I don't even go to child. So I do hookups
• 50:08
  Speaker 2: every night. I cook.
• 50:10
  Speaker 1: So you're in your own space then.
• 50:11
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm going to cook every night.
• 50:13
  Speaker 1: So you kind of try to create your own system
• 50:15
  Speaker 1: within that system, do you feel like, in a way?
• 50:17
  Speaker 2: No, that's just how I live. That's how I do
• 50:19
  Speaker 2: my time. I do my bed like that. I don't
• 50:21
  Speaker 2: really go to childlessness on chicken day. Right.
• 50:24
  Speaker 1: And no judgment on that.
• 50:26
  Speaker 2: I probably don't go on chicken day because all the
• 50:29
  Speaker 2: chicken is going to get brought to me anyway, and
• 50:31
  Speaker 2: I'm going to just cut all that up and put
• 50:33
  Speaker 2: that in a soup, put that in a hookup. A
• 50:35
  Speaker 2: hookup like where you get a big bowl and you,
• 50:38
  Speaker 2: you know, we cook.
• 50:38
  Speaker 1: You got your own thing going. Now, how do you
• 50:40
  Speaker 1: heat the food up in the cell?
• 50:42
  Speaker 2: It depends on what spot we at. It depends on
• 50:46
  Speaker 2: where we at. They got some people, they cook on
• 50:48
  Speaker 2: the bone, like on the middle. They got some people,
• 50:53
  Speaker 2: they got some jails where they give you a hot pot,
• 50:56
  Speaker 2: but you got to rig it for it to make
• 50:57
  Speaker 2: it boil. It depends. Some people make a stinger. What
• 51:01
  Speaker 2: is that? A stinger, that's the thing they hook in
• 51:03
  Speaker 2: the electric socket and Let's single. It depends.
• 51:08
  Speaker 1: Oh, there you got somebody grilling something right there on
• 51:10
  Speaker 1: a bed sheet.
• 51:12
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Oh, that's good. It depends on what spot we at.
• 51:16
  Speaker 1: They have some good chefs in prison?
• 51:18
  Speaker 2: The best. Amen.
• 51:19
  Speaker 1: Amen, dude. Yeah, where's that cooking show, huh?
• 51:22
  Speaker 2: They got people make pizzas, everything. Anything you can think of.
• 51:27
  Speaker 2: Stir fry, everything. Yeah. I love that. I was locked
• 51:32
  Speaker 2: up in Florida. They got some shit they do. They
• 51:34
  Speaker 2: called making a brick. Where they take it, man, they
• 51:37
  Speaker 2: put everything in there, turkey, sausage, everything. And they just,
• 51:40
  Speaker 2: I'm talking about everything you could think of they can
• 51:42
  Speaker 2: get out of the kitchen. They put it in there
• 51:44
  Speaker 2: and they make it, they cook it in a Dorito
• 51:47
  Speaker 2: bag and make it like a whole little brick. Oh, yeah. Man,
• 51:50
  Speaker 2: I'm talking about the truth. Good, huh?
• 51:53
  Speaker 1: You ever do a prison night or something at the house,
• 51:54
  Speaker 1: remake some food like that or try to, you ever
• 51:57
  Speaker 1: remake any stuff like that for your friends so they
• 51:58
  Speaker 1: can taste it?
• 51:59
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I done did that for my partners and my
• 52:01
  Speaker 2: little son. He like all that.
• 52:02
  Speaker 1: Oh, hell yeah.
• 52:04
  Speaker 2: But we come from that anywhere on the street, nothing
• 52:06
  Speaker 2: but ramen noodles and all that. We come from that,
• 52:08
  Speaker 2: putting anything you can find in it.
• 52:09
  Speaker 1: Yeah, well, the big thing in our house is— Oh, yeah,
• 52:12
  Speaker 1: my partner.
• 52:12
  Speaker 2: Used to make my— he wasn't my silly, but he was
• 52:15
  Speaker 2: like two doors down. About three doors down, he used
• 52:19
  Speaker 2: to make burritos.
• 52:20
  Speaker 1: Oh, yeah. Did he really? He's a Mexican guy?
• 52:24
  Speaker 2: Nuh-uh, he wasn't Mexican, but he used to make burritos.
• 52:26
  Speaker 1: He pretended he was Mexican.
• 52:27
  Speaker 2: For dinner, huh? You would have thought he was a Mexican.
• 52:30
  Speaker 1: God. I love a burrito, bro.
• 52:32
  Speaker 2: Man, he used to make the best ones.
• 52:34
  Speaker 1: I didn't like him at first because I didn't want
• 52:35
  Speaker 1: to do, I like sandwiches. I didn't want to betray
• 52:37
  Speaker 1: a sandwich.
• 52:38
  Speaker 2: Man, he used to do it with all beef, all turkey,
• 52:41
  Speaker 2: all chicken. I'm talking about the truth. My God. Onions, everything.
• 52:45
  Speaker 2: Bell peppers, everything.
• 52:46
  Speaker 1: Oh.
• 52:47
  Speaker 2: He was putting everything in it.
• 52:48
  Speaker 1: Now, all the ingredients, you get them through the jail
• 52:51
  Speaker 1: or some people smuggle in a bell pepper.
• 52:52
  Speaker 2: You get that from commissary. But like vegetables and shit,
• 52:56
  Speaker 2: that's going to get broke. That's coming from the kitchen. Yeah.
• 52:59
  Speaker 2: That's going to get broke. That's broke.
• 53:02
  Speaker 1: And what about, it got any good desserts in prison?
• 53:04
  Speaker 1: Was there ever like a- Yeah, they.
• 53:05
  Speaker 2: Got dudes in there that make candy. They got dudes
• 53:07
  Speaker 2: in there that make ice cream.
• 53:08
  Speaker 1: God dang, really?
• 53:10
  Speaker 2: Wow, I would love that. They got dudes that make everything,
• 53:13
  Speaker 2: you know. Them some of the most creative people you're
• 53:15
  Speaker 2: going to ever meet in your life. Them some of
• 53:17
  Speaker 2: the most intelligent people you're going to ever meet in
• 53:20
  Speaker 2: your life. Yeah. The most intelligent.
• 53:24
  Speaker 1: You talk about weights. You talk about yoga. You got
• 53:25
  Speaker 1: any yoga when you're in there?
• 53:26
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah. I accidentally got into yoga.
• 53:29
  Speaker 1: How'd that happen?
• 53:30
  Speaker 2: My partner kept telling me, man, bro.
• 53:31
  Speaker 1: But I think a lot of black men, you can't
• 53:33
  Speaker 1: just say I got into yoga. I think you have
• 53:35
  Speaker 1: to be like, I accidentally got into yoga.
• 53:37
  Speaker 2: I was against it. I was all the way against it. Oh, yeah.
• 53:40
  Speaker 2: He was telling me, man, bro, I'm telling you, bro,
• 53:42
  Speaker 2: they got yoga classes. I said, well, you go in
• 53:44
  Speaker 2: there and bend over. I'm not going in there and
• 53:46
  Speaker 2: do that shit. You go in there and bend your
• 53:47
  Speaker 2: ass over. Yeah. So that was, I was just, I
• 53:50
  Speaker 2: was like too hard for myself. Just whatever, whatever, whatever.
• 53:53
  Speaker 2: So- One of my partners from across the hall, he
• 53:56
  Speaker 2: was like, yeah, bro, I'm gonna holler at you. I'm
• 53:57
  Speaker 2: about to go do yoga. I say, for what? He
• 54:00
  Speaker 2: was like, man, I couldn't even like, he was telling
• 54:02
  Speaker 2: me he had knee pains and all kinds of different
• 54:04
  Speaker 2: pains in his joints. He said, I don't even have
• 54:07
  Speaker 2: that shit no more since I've been doing yoga. He said, man,
• 54:09
  Speaker 2: everything on me, like he said, it's been healing my body.
• 54:13
  Speaker 2: So I'm like, whatever. Like two days past, I give
• 54:17
  Speaker 2: it a try. Go in there. The first maybe, two
• 54:21
  Speaker 2: poses of the shit I did, I'm thinking it's some bullshit. Like,
• 54:24
  Speaker 2: you know, when you see on TV, you see people, Namaste. Yeah.
• 54:29
  Speaker 2: You know, you thinking it's bullshit. So I did it. Yeah. Like,
• 54:33
  Speaker 2: maybe after the third pose, I ran to the bathroom
• 54:37
  Speaker 2: and shitted everything. Like, it cut my appetite. It's really
• 54:41
  Speaker 2: what started my, kind of started my fitness journey. Like,
• 54:44
  Speaker 2: a lot of the people that was lifting weights and
• 54:46
  Speaker 2: doing all that would still come and do yoga because
• 54:49
  Speaker 2: I had read in the, What's that? The Arnold Schwarzenegger Encyclopedia?
• 54:54
  Speaker 2: That big yellow book?
• 54:55
  Speaker 1: What's he got on there? He had a big, it's called.
• 54:58
  Speaker 2: There you go right there. Arnold Schwarzenegger Encyclopedia. That's the one.
• 55:04
  Speaker 2: But he did yoga. He was like whenever a lion
• 55:07
  Speaker 2: wake up, a lion stretch first before they do anything.
• 55:10
  Speaker 2: So I started looking at it. And you know, when
• 55:15
  Speaker 2: you start feeding yourself that, You know, your brain open
• 55:19
  Speaker 2: up to something different when you're reading it because you
• 55:22
  Speaker 2: become like an information freak. You become like a seeker
• 55:25
  Speaker 2: of knowledge because this is the only thing that's stimulating
• 55:28
  Speaker 2: you mentally. You know what I'm saying? You're being stimulated
• 55:31
  Speaker 2: by new information. So then I was like, man, yeah,
• 55:34
  Speaker 2: I'm going to go fuck with it. So I started
• 55:36
  Speaker 2: fucking with it. I came home. I got off it.
• 55:39
  Speaker 2: But then I got back on it. And now I'm
• 55:42
  Speaker 2: like fully committed. Oh, yeah, dude.
• 55:45
  Speaker 1: I've definitely done some yoga where you'll, I mean, you
• 55:48
  Speaker 1: will shit. You have shit. You're like, damn, this shit
• 55:50
  Speaker 1: been missing.
• 55:50
  Speaker 2: It cuts your appetite and everything.
• 55:52
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 55:52
  Speaker 2: If I don't do yoga, I feel weird. Yeah.
• 55:56
  Speaker 1: Oh, dude, there's nothing better when you get done with
• 55:58
  Speaker 1: yoga and you cut off the computer or however you do,
• 56:01
  Speaker 1: you know.
• 56:01
  Speaker 2: Man, I love when my yoga coach used to tell me,
• 56:04
  Speaker 2: thank you for allowing me to share this space with you. Namaste. Yeah.
• 56:10
  Speaker 2: I'm like, I bet you not like this at the house.
• 56:13
  Speaker 2: But in my brain, you know. Oh, yeah.
• 56:18
  Speaker 1: Oh, dude, yoga sometimes, bro. There'd be a pose one
• 56:20
  Speaker 1: time I would do something with my shoulder.
• 56:23
  Speaker 2: I had shoulder pain and all that shit.
• 56:24
  Speaker 1: It unlocked something inside of me. My tears just coming
• 56:27
  Speaker 1: out of my face, just stuck in my muscles.
• 56:29
  Speaker 2: You know that's crazy? That happened to me doing a
• 56:32
  Speaker 2: pigeon pose. And I was just in the pose. I
• 56:36
  Speaker 2: was laying there, and I didn't want to lift back
• 56:39
  Speaker 2: up because I was just crying uncontrollably. And she came
• 56:41
  Speaker 2: and put her hands on my back, and she was like,
• 56:44
  Speaker 2: The energy that you're feeling right now is not your own.
• 56:46
  Speaker 2: It's just psychic debris. You're having an emotional detox.
• 56:50
  Speaker 3: Damn.
• 56:51
  Speaker 2: Release it. And I was just breathing through it. And
• 56:54
  Speaker 2: then I did the left side. And then whoever tell
• 56:58
  Speaker 2: us about emotional detoxes, I ain't grew up knowing about
• 57:01
  Speaker 2: that shit. I ain't know that everything that we go
• 57:03
  Speaker 2: through traumatically, it harness itself somewhere in some type of
• 57:08
  Speaker 2: muscle fascia or somewhere in the fascia. I ain't know
• 57:11
  Speaker 2: that shit.
• 57:12
  Speaker 1: Well, there's not a lot of guys I don't feel
• 57:14
  Speaker 1: like where you're from talking about this stuff, man. What
• 57:17
  Speaker 1: do you think really took you?
• 57:18
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I felt like it was. I'm going to be
• 57:19
  Speaker 2: honest with you. I did prejudge it. I thought that
• 57:22
  Speaker 2: was for pussies.
• 57:24
  Speaker 1: Oh, yeah, dude.
• 57:25
  Speaker 2: When they first told me about yoga, I'm not about
• 57:27
  Speaker 2: to do that bitch-ass shit.
• 57:29
  Speaker 1: Especially in prison. I didn't even know they had different sports.
• 57:31
  Speaker 1: I thought homosexuality was the only sport in prison.
• 57:34
  Speaker 2: The first thing I told them, I said, man, you
• 57:35
  Speaker 2: go in there and bend your ass over. I'm not
• 57:37
  Speaker 2: about to do it.
• 57:38
  Speaker 1: Yeah, fucking little zesty boy.
• 57:40
  Speaker 2: Next thing I know, I was doing them warrior poses and.
• 57:43
  Speaker 1: All that shit.
• 57:44
  Speaker 2: This shit ain't no joke.
• 57:47
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you get in there with your little sugar cane
• 57:49
  Speaker 1: in there. I ain't going in there. That's how I
• 57:50
  Speaker 1: would think at first. You get in there with your
• 57:53
  Speaker 1: little Spicy baby body.
• 57:55
  Speaker 2: Nah, you're only a victim of what you entertain.
• 57:57
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Oh, but that's how I was. I was against everything.
• 58:01
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I used to plex like that. I think in
• 58:03
  Speaker 2: juvenile detention, because you hear so many fucked up stories
• 58:06
  Speaker 2: about jail, when you go in there, they're going to
• 58:08
  Speaker 2: try to fuck you. Yeah, they're fucking people. And you
• 58:10
  Speaker 2: think that's how it's going.
• 58:12
  Speaker 1: Yeah, don't wear no cologne in there.
• 58:14
  Speaker 2: When you go in there, the first thing you do
• 58:16
  Speaker 2: is plex. And what I mean by plex, you have
• 58:18
  Speaker 2: a complex. You're in defense mode. But when you get there,
• 58:22
  Speaker 2: you really see that prison is structured. It's really off respect.
• 58:26
  Speaker 2: It's ran off respect. Respect run the compound. Ain't nobody
• 58:30
  Speaker 2: going to pass by you and not say excuse me.
• 58:33
  Speaker 2: It's different.
• 58:34
  Speaker 1: Do you admire the level of respect that was in
• 58:36
  Speaker 1: there in some ways?
• 58:39
  Speaker 2: I give my respect first, but at the end of
• 58:42
  Speaker 2: the day, I still demand it.
• 58:45
  Speaker 1: Did you get treated special because you had celebrity in
• 58:48
  Speaker 1: your life, you think?
• 58:49
  Speaker 2: I wasn't a celebrity at first. Got it. Like juvenile
• 58:53
  Speaker 2: detention through that circuit, I wasn't necessarily.
• 58:55
  Speaker 1: Was it scary to go back to prison? Like, damn,
• 58:57
  Speaker 1: now they know me.
• 58:57
  Speaker 2: Juvenile facilities are more chaotic than adult facilities.
• 59:01
  Speaker 1: Oh, yeah, I could see that.
• 59:02
  Speaker 2: So they way more chaotic. So that's where the fighting
• 59:06
  Speaker 2: and all that go on every day. And adult prison
• 59:09
  Speaker 2: is structured. It ain't like that. It's laid back. That
• 59:12
  Speaker 2: shit they be showing on TV, them Mickey Mouse camps. Yeah.
• 59:16
  Speaker 2: That's not no.
• 59:17
  Speaker 1: Right, it's not real shit.
• 59:17
  Speaker 2: That's not no maximum security. That's not no none of that.
• 59:20
  Speaker 2: Them Mickey Mouse camps.
• 59:21
  Speaker 1: I used to want to go.
• 59:21
  Speaker 2: That's not like Louisiana. Like, Louisiana prisons are the roughest
• 59:27
  Speaker 2: prisons ever. From my perspective, because I haven't been around
• 59:31
  Speaker 2: a little bit, I haven't been to prison in Canada.
• 59:34
  Speaker 1: That sounds nice.
• 59:36
  Speaker 2: So, man, they had the best food.
• 59:38
  Speaker 1: Oh, man, Canada's great. I would go to prison in Canada.
• 59:40
  Speaker 2: It was different. Like, the way they respect you there
• 59:44
  Speaker 2: is total. Like, the way the guards respect you there
• 59:46
  Speaker 2: is different. When you get to Louisiana, it's a whole
• 59:49
  Speaker 2: other story.
• 59:49
  Speaker 1: Yeah, always different. There's a different way that people communicate overall. Dude,
• 59:53
  Speaker 1: I'll tell you this, even. What I noticed about racial
• 59:55
  Speaker 1: stuff in Canada when I was up there, I feel
• 59:59
  Speaker 1: like sometimes in America, especially growing up in the South,
• 1:00:02
  Speaker 1: there's some tension between black and white, I feel like,
• 1:00:06
  Speaker 1: but there's a lot of history, right?
• 1:00:07
  Speaker 2: Louisiana, Mississippi, all white boys different.
• 1:00:09
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:00:10
  Speaker 2: Oh, for sure.
• 1:00:11
  Speaker 1: But in Canada, if you- They different. In Canada, there's
• 1:00:14
  Speaker 1: no racial tension.
• 1:00:14
  Speaker 2: They not regular white boys in Mississippi and Louisiana. They
• 1:00:19
  Speaker 2: built different.
• 1:00:20
  Speaker 1: Well, some of them seem like- I.
• 1:00:25
  Speaker 2: Got a partner right now. We is locked up. If
• 1:00:28
  Speaker 2: you call him G. White, you might as well just
• 1:00:32
  Speaker 2: go and get rid of him. Just don't even call him.
• 1:00:34
  Speaker 2: Because you know that'd be like, what up, G. White?
• 1:00:37
  Speaker 2: You know you say that. You know he think he
• 1:00:40
  Speaker 2: a nigga. What up, G. White? Man, they got some
• 1:00:42
  Speaker 2: white boy. They not going for that. You not about
• 1:00:46
  Speaker 2: to call me G. White. We could fight all. Hey,
• 1:00:48
  Speaker 2: all we could play with that knife. And that's how
• 1:00:50
  Speaker 2: they come. And they built like that.
• 1:00:52
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's changed a little bit, huh?
• 1:00:54
  Speaker 2: No, it ain't changed. It's been like that.
• 1:00:55
  Speaker 1: You think?
• 1:00:56
  Speaker 2: Yeah, you got real niggas and bitch niggas everywhere you go.
• 1:00:59
  Speaker 1: God dang, I hope so.
• 1:01:01
  Speaker 2: So it's like.
• 1:01:02
  Speaker 1: I'm glad to know that.
• 1:01:03
  Speaker 2: Yeah, you're only a victim of what you entertain. Yeah. See,
• 1:01:07
  Speaker 2: like when you went to the sugar cane, baby, that conversation,
• 1:01:10
  Speaker 2: I ain't even grin because I'm not in. Right. If
• 1:01:13
  Speaker 2: you grin, you in. Oh, dang. That was your conversation.
• 1:01:16
  Speaker 1: I'm not talking to me.
• 1:01:18
  Speaker 2: Like when you was like, yeah, I want to be
• 1:01:19
  Speaker 2: in there with my sugar baby and the yoga thing.
• 1:01:21
  Speaker 2: I was like.
• 1:01:22
  Speaker 1: I said there were men in there. I think there's
• 1:01:24
  Speaker 1: creative men in there.
• 1:01:26
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that wasn't my conversation. I'm a real Vic, so
• 1:01:30
  Speaker 2: that just went over my head. I ain't no new Jack.
• 1:01:32
  Speaker 1: Me too, bro. I ain't about that shit.
• 1:01:34
  Speaker 2: Yeah, so when somebody had them kind of conversations.
• 1:01:37
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I ain't having them.
• 1:01:38
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that just go over my head.
• 1:01:40
  Speaker 1: Me too.
• 1:01:41
  Speaker 2: Because if you grin, you in. You're only victim of
• 1:01:43
  Speaker 2: what you entertain.
• 1:01:44
  Speaker 1: I'm chilling. I ain't smiling about nothing. I feel that.
• 1:01:48
  Speaker 2: Not like if you grin, you in, but if you
• 1:01:50
  Speaker 2: entertain it. Right. Oh, I see what you're saying. You know,
• 1:01:52
  Speaker 2: you opened the door for that.
• 1:01:53
  Speaker 1: Yeah, not me. I'm locking that up.
• 1:01:56
  Speaker 2: And that's one thing I teach my son. Like, sometimes
• 1:01:59
  Speaker 2: he'll see something on the Internet, like a comment. I say, hey,
• 1:02:02
  Speaker 2: you don't entertain that. You a man. Right. Don't ever
• 1:02:05
  Speaker 2: let nobody defeat you with words. You don't entertain it.
• 1:02:08
  Speaker 1: How did you start to get to know yourself, right?
• 1:02:10
  Speaker 1: Because you talked about that.
• 1:02:13
  Speaker 2: Solitude.
• 1:02:14
  Speaker 1: Really?
• 1:02:16
  Speaker 2: Solitude.
• 1:02:17
  Speaker 1: Because you're one of the few kind of rappers I
• 1:02:19
  Speaker 1: feel like that I've met or experienced or paid attention
• 1:02:22
  Speaker 1: to that I know of that talks about that kind
• 1:02:23
  Speaker 1: of stuff, their relationship with themselves, right?
• 1:02:25
  Speaker 2: Most of the things that we did, excuse me, I
• 1:02:28
  Speaker 2: can't say we. I'm going to speak for me. All right.
• 1:02:30
  Speaker 2: Most of the things that I did in my life
• 1:02:32
  Speaker 2: that people would consider heroic or violent that I got
• 1:02:38
  Speaker 2: stripes for, that was out of fear or seeking validation
• 1:02:42
  Speaker 2: from somebody older than me.
• 1:02:44
  Speaker 1: But how did you start to realize that that's what
• 1:02:47
  Speaker 1: was going on? Like that you, like when you say
• 1:02:51
  Speaker 1: like solitary, being by yourself.
• 1:02:55
  Speaker 2: Being in solitude, spending time alone.
• 1:02:58
  Speaker 1: So what was that practice? Did you have a practice
• 1:02:59
  Speaker 1: that started? I mean, you said like a little bit
• 1:03:01
  Speaker 1: of yoga. So that kind of opened up your idea
• 1:03:02
  Speaker 1: to like doing something different. But what, like, what was,
• 1:03:06
  Speaker 1: was there somebody who started to teach you these practices?
• 1:03:09
  Speaker 2: Because.
• 1:03:10
  Speaker 1: It's hard to get from just.
• 1:03:12
  Speaker 2: When a student ready to learn to teach you a pill,
• 1:03:14
  Speaker 2: once you start walking this path, like this path led
• 1:03:18
  Speaker 2: me to doing this right now, today. And when I
• 1:03:22
  Speaker 2: leave here, I don't know who I'm going to meet
• 1:03:24
  Speaker 2: that may give me a tidbit of knowledge that's going
• 1:03:26
  Speaker 2: to propel me forward. I don't know. And it just,
• 1:03:30
  Speaker 2: you pick it up. The reward really is in the journey.
• 1:03:33
  Speaker 2: So I just pick up little tidbits along the way. Yeah.
• 1:03:37
  Speaker 2: How you say it? Tidbits, my bad.
• 1:03:39
  Speaker 1: Yeah, tid.
• 1:03:40
  Speaker 2: That's that Louisiana, my tongue heavy.
• 1:03:42
  Speaker 1: That tidbits, oh yeah.
• 1:03:43
  Speaker 2: So I talk lazy.
• 1:03:48
  Speaker 1: When you look on your life, what's some of the
• 1:03:50
  Speaker 1: worst pain that you felt like you have ever been in?
• 1:03:53
  Speaker 2: Physical, emotional, or mental?
• 1:03:54
  Speaker 1: Emotional probably, I would say, or mental. Because I've heard
• 1:03:58
  Speaker 1: you talk about trauma and overcoming past traumas. You don't
• 1:04:01
  Speaker 1: hear a lot of people talk like that. You know,
• 1:04:03
  Speaker 1: so like, I'm just like.
• 1:04:05
  Speaker 2: Recently, 2020, I was going to kill myself. Damn. I
• 1:04:10
  Speaker 2: had deleted my Instagram for like a year and a half.
• 1:04:14
  Speaker 2: I was going to kill myself. Because I only felt
• 1:04:18
  Speaker 2: appreciated for my ability to do. And then I was
• 1:04:22
  Speaker 2: always looking at Instagram, and it was like I was comparison.
• 1:04:27
  Speaker 2: And I spoke about this before. I was comparing my
• 1:04:29
  Speaker 2: life to other people's life. And comparison really is the
• 1:04:34
  Speaker 2: killer of all joy. And I didn't understand that until
• 1:04:37
  Speaker 2: I started looking at my life like, damn. Like, I'm
• 1:04:41
  Speaker 2: seeing everybody highlight real. But at the end of the day,
• 1:04:45
  Speaker 2: I'm just me. But everybody else living so great. But
• 1:04:49
  Speaker 2: that's just the highlights. That's not what they going through
• 1:04:52
  Speaker 2: every day. And it took me getting off Instagram and
• 1:04:56
  Speaker 2: getting off social media, period, to see that people really
• 1:05:00
  Speaker 2: do love me. and enjoy the world and start having gratitude. Like,
• 1:05:05
  Speaker 2: think about the things you grateful for. Not what you
• 1:05:08
  Speaker 2: don't have and not how shit not going, but think
• 1:05:10
  Speaker 2: about all the good shit and just be thankful. Like,
• 1:05:13
  Speaker 2: I'm grateful for this, I'm grateful for that. And that's
• 1:05:15
  Speaker 2: when things started to kind of change for me.
• 1:05:18
  Speaker 1: A lot of people say that kind of stuff, but
• 1:05:19
  Speaker 1: that's not a practice in their life, right? It's not
• 1:05:21
  Speaker 1: like a real truth that they're living. I think that's
• 1:05:24
  Speaker 1: one thing to me, that's interesting by you, it feels
• 1:05:26
  Speaker 1: like that's really how you have chosen to live your life.
• 1:05:30
  Speaker 1: What were like practices?
• 1:05:30
  Speaker 2: I don't have, I'm going to be honest, every day
• 1:05:32
  Speaker 2: not going to be a good day for me. But
• 1:05:35
  Speaker 2: I'm still going to go to the gym. Right. Because
• 1:05:37
  Speaker 2: that is my therapy. And I kind of train myself
• 1:05:40
  Speaker 2: to know that whenever I have like a fucked up feeling,
• 1:05:43
  Speaker 2: like the days that I don't even want to go,
• 1:05:46
  Speaker 2: them the days that I had the best workouts. I
• 1:05:49
  Speaker 2: then kind of start playing a game with myself. I
• 1:05:51
  Speaker 2: know when certain people start texting me, And as low
• 1:05:54
  Speaker 2: vibrational people, something good must be about to happen. There's
• 1:05:57
  Speaker 2: got to be a test. Something good about to happen.
• 1:05:59
  Speaker 2: And I just started training myself to look at it
• 1:06:01
  Speaker 2: like that. And that's really how it be going now. Yeah.
• 1:06:04
  Speaker 1: Alternate act like that. Taking the opposite choice. Making the
• 1:06:07
  Speaker 1: opposite choice. Because everything inside of you is like, take
• 1:06:10
  Speaker 1: off today. Take it easy. Don't do nothing.
• 1:06:12
  Speaker 2: I swear to God. I went jogged and everything before
• 1:06:15
  Speaker 2: I came here. Amen.
• 1:06:17
  Speaker 1: I heard you talk before about a lot of men
• 1:06:19
  Speaker 1: you don't feel like are living their truth, right?
• 1:06:22
  Speaker 2: Right now.
• 1:06:24
  Speaker 1: I feel like we're in a tough spot with love
• 1:06:28
  Speaker 1: and the moral value of relationships and stuff like that.
• 1:06:32
  Speaker 2: Ain't nobody really loving people no more. I think I'm
• 1:06:40
  Speaker 2: the only person right now that's really living in my authenticity.
• 1:06:46
  Speaker 2: I'm talking about as far as on the main stage,
• 1:06:48
  Speaker 2: people say what's politically correct and I don't give a
• 1:06:51
  Speaker 2: fuck what nobody think about me. Because if everybody like me,
• 1:06:54
  Speaker 2: then I'm pussy. You know what I'm saying? I'm just,
• 1:06:57
  Speaker 2: I want to be liked by everybody. He who is
• 1:06:59
  Speaker 2: a friend to everyone is a friend to no one.
• 1:07:02
  Speaker 2: I'm not a good, I'm not friendly, but I'm a
• 1:07:04
  Speaker 2: great friend. And that's just my perspective on it. Like,
• 1:07:10
  Speaker 2: it's a lot of people that won't allow themselves to
• 1:07:13
  Speaker 2: love somebody based on their past situations or the bumps
• 1:07:17
  Speaker 2: and mistakes that they made. And for fear of how
• 1:07:21
  Speaker 2: the rest of the world will look at them, I
• 1:07:24
  Speaker 2: don't care how the world look at me. Don't care.
• 1:07:28
  Speaker 2: I'm living life all out. Damn, dude. Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. Really, really.
• 1:07:35
  Speaker 1: Dude, I'll tell you this, Kevin. I remember times in
• 1:07:38
  Speaker 1: my life I was like, man, I wouldn't date a
• 1:07:40
  Speaker 1: certain girl because of what my friends would think of her, bro.
• 1:07:42
  Speaker 1: And then I spent like a couple years like that
• 1:07:45
  Speaker 1: one time. I had that problem, but But then I
• 1:07:47
  Speaker 1: missed out on a good opportunity, too.
• 1:07:50
  Speaker 2: Man, once I started fucking with this little chick, everybody
• 1:07:55
  Speaker 2: told me don't fuck with her. She ended up being,
• 1:07:58
  Speaker 2: and still to this day, we still good friends. She
• 1:08:00
  Speaker 2: was one of the most solid people I ever met.
• 1:08:02
  Speaker 2: And this back from when I was still on the block.
• 1:08:06
  Speaker 2: And we still cool. She doing good for herself now.
• 1:08:09
  Speaker 2: She in the real estate and shit now. But this
• 1:08:11
  Speaker 2: from back when I was on the block with her.
• 1:08:14
  Speaker 2: She was dancing. She used to dance. Everybody, man, don't
• 1:08:17
  Speaker 2: mess with her. She a stripper. She... And she ended
• 1:08:19
  Speaker 2: up being one of the most solid people. And that's
• 1:08:22
  Speaker 2: when I realized it's the people that the world say
• 1:08:24
  Speaker 2: the most fucked up shit about be the best people.
• 1:08:27
  Speaker 2: And the people everybody praise and be like, yeah, this person,
• 1:08:30
  Speaker 2: he's such a great guy. They really be barbaric behind
• 1:08:33
  Speaker 2: closed doors. They don't have no morals. They don't have
• 1:08:35
  Speaker 2: no principles. They don't stand for nothing. So I just
• 1:08:39
  Speaker 2: noticed some of your better people be the people that
• 1:08:41
  Speaker 2: everybody don't like.
• 1:08:43
  Speaker 1: Well, I think it's tough for people.
• 1:08:44
  Speaker 2: You kind of, one of them people, like, when I
• 1:08:47
  Speaker 2: say authentic, like, you pretty much do your own shit.
• 1:08:53
  Speaker 2: You one of them people. Thanks. To me, you live
• 1:08:57
  Speaker 2: in your authenticity. A lot of people be like, the
• 1:09:00
  Speaker 2: stuff that you say, a lot of people wouldn't say
• 1:09:02
  Speaker 2: it for fear of how it would be perceived. You
• 1:09:04
  Speaker 2: just say it, and I'm like, I can't help but
• 1:09:09
  Speaker 2: to fuck with it.
• 1:09:10
  Speaker 1: That's a good point, right?
• 1:09:12
  Speaker 2: You just real people.
• 1:09:13
  Speaker 1: Thanks for the compliment, man. Yeah, I try my best.
• 1:09:16
  Speaker 1: I think the tough part is- It was the truth.
• 1:09:19
  Speaker 2: Like, it was the truth. Right.
• 1:09:22
  Speaker 1: I think the tough part, it's just, I'm just always
• 1:09:28
  Speaker 1: still trying to figure out who I am, and I'm
• 1:09:29
  Speaker 1: amazed at new things that come along.
• 1:09:31
  Speaker 2: Most people won't admit that, like, one of my albums
• 1:09:35
  Speaker 2: that's about to come out is called Don't Know What
• 1:09:37
  Speaker 2: I'm Doing, because I don't know what I'm doing. Yeah.
• 1:09:40
  Speaker 2: Most people won't admit that they don't know what they're doing.
• 1:09:42
  Speaker 2: I don't know what I'm doing. I'm still discovering new
• 1:09:45
  Speaker 2: parts of myself every day. I don't know. People be
• 1:09:49
  Speaker 2: asking me, so what you going to do today? I
• 1:09:50
  Speaker 2: don't know. I haven't figured it out yet.
• 1:09:56
  Speaker 1: How do you keep your ego? Because this is something
• 1:09:57
  Speaker 1: I've noticed in my life, right? Like my ego. How
• 1:10:01
  Speaker 1: do I figure out what is my ego and what
• 1:10:03
  Speaker 1: is self-confidence and self-worth? Do you know what I'm talking about?
• 1:10:07
  Speaker 1: Your ego can slip in.
• 1:10:08
  Speaker 2: To be honest, 2025, some people can say that I'm
• 1:10:16
  Speaker 2: operating out of ego. But I'm not giving to nobody
• 1:10:19
  Speaker 2: but me. Like, I'm not. I've given everything I had
• 1:10:23
  Speaker 2: to give, and now everybody else can just figure it out.
• 1:10:29
  Speaker 2: And we can say that's ego, that's cool, but when
• 1:10:32
  Speaker 2: I go to the gym, I don't ego lift. Right.
• 1:10:34
  Speaker 2: I don't lift the heaviest weights in there. I do
• 1:10:38
  Speaker 2: what's comfortable for me. I work at my own pace. Hey,
• 1:10:41
  Speaker 2: you know, what I eat doesn't make you shit, and
• 1:10:44
  Speaker 2: what you eat doesn't make me shit. Mm-hmm. So if
• 1:10:47
  Speaker 2: you want to go in there and be the world's
• 1:10:48
  Speaker 2: strongest person, you know, good luck, buddy.
• 1:10:51
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:10:53
  Speaker 2: Great for you. I do what works for me. And
• 1:10:57
  Speaker 2: I always make sure, am I getting what I came for?
• 1:11:02
  Speaker 2: I just want to get what I came for. Like,
• 1:11:03
  Speaker 2: what do you mean by that? Like, when I go
• 1:11:05
  Speaker 2: to the gym, I don't get sidetracked and hosializing.
• 1:11:09
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:11:10
  Speaker 2: What I mean by hosializing is I knew I had
• 1:11:13
  Speaker 2: this interview today, and I already made the commitment. So
• 1:11:17
  Speaker 2: I'm going to honor that commitment. So when I went,
• 1:11:19
  Speaker 2: I'm just giving you an illustration.
• 1:11:21
  Speaker 1: For sure.
• 1:11:21
  Speaker 2: Or example. So when I went to the gym today,
• 1:11:23
  Speaker 2: I went in there to get what I came for.
• 1:11:25
  Speaker 2: I ain't coming here to be friendly. I ain't coming
• 1:11:27
  Speaker 2: here to hosialize. And what I mean by hosialize, you know,
• 1:11:30
  Speaker 2: you aren't compared by y'all over there hosializing, huh? Yeah. Hosializing. Yeah,
• 1:11:34
  Speaker 2: y'all over there hosializing. You lying to him and he
• 1:11:36
  Speaker 2: lying to you. Y'all lying to each other. I ain't
• 1:11:40
  Speaker 2: coming here to hosialize.
• 1:11:43
  Speaker 1: Yeah, man. I think having... parameters for yourself and boundaries
• 1:11:46
  Speaker 1: for what your goals are. That's, I think, what.
• 1:11:49
  Speaker 2: And had I not did what I needed to do
• 1:11:53
  Speaker 2: to raise my frequency, me going to the gym that
• 1:11:55
  Speaker 2: day was committing to act of self-love, I wouldn't have
• 1:11:58
  Speaker 2: been able to do this. Right. I feel great now. Yeah.
• 1:12:01
  Speaker 2: I feel amazing.
• 1:12:04
  Speaker 1: Yeah, your energy comes in, and yeah, it's funny, because
• 1:12:07
  Speaker 1: you come in, I feel like, damn, I got to...
• 1:12:09
  Speaker 1: I want to be on a level.
• 1:12:10
  Speaker 2: Well, you came in when I saw Jesse... And every
• 1:12:13
  Speaker 2: time I see Jesse, I'm, Jesse is a friend, and
• 1:12:17
  Speaker 2: he's always been a good friend of mine. Lately, something's changed.
• 1:12:21
  Speaker 2: If you're watching this, Jesse, shout out to you, Jesse.
• 1:12:25
  Speaker 2: He was like, every time I see him, he was like,
• 1:12:30
  Speaker 2: every time he sees me, he makes a song about
• 1:12:32
  Speaker 2: stealing my fucking girl. And that's just a joke that
• 1:12:35
  Speaker 2: we got every time I see you.
• 1:12:37
  Speaker 1: Good to see you, Jesse, bro.
• 1:12:39
  Speaker 2: Yeah, Jesse, if you're watching this....
• 1:12:43
  Speaker 1: He's watching, man.
• 1:12:44
  Speaker 2: If you're watching, Jesse, this one's for you, brother. It's
• 1:12:45
  Speaker 2: for you, buddy.
• 1:12:47
  Speaker 1: It's for you, buddy. Did you have self-hatred and stuff?
• 1:12:51
  Speaker 1: Did you deal with that?
• 1:12:52
  Speaker 2: Of course.
• 1:12:52
  Speaker 1: How'd you know you had it?
• 1:12:55
  Speaker 2: My actions. You know who told me, who kind of
• 1:12:59
  Speaker 2: started the conversation? I was talking to Plaz one day.
• 1:13:04
  Speaker 1: Really?
• 1:13:04
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and it may not seem like it, but that's
• 1:13:08
  Speaker 2: a real intelligent dude. So he was like, man, Gator.
• 1:13:12
  Speaker 2: That's something I be noticing, bro. He said, Gates, man,
• 1:13:16
  Speaker 2: you be acting like an ugly nigga, man. I said,
• 1:13:18
  Speaker 2: what you mean? You just be, you be moving around
• 1:13:20
  Speaker 2: like an ugly nigga, man, and you not no ugly nigga.
• 1:13:23
  Speaker 2: You handsome, but I'm just saying you be like an
• 1:13:25
  Speaker 2: ugly nigga. And I be like, what you mean? Man,
• 1:13:28
  Speaker 2: you got to have some security with you. Can't nobody
• 1:13:31
  Speaker 2: be just touching you. And then we were sitting down
• 1:13:35
  Speaker 2: at the table and a lady was trying to tell me,
• 1:13:37
  Speaker 2: he said, hold on, I'm delicate. I ain't know what
• 1:13:40
  Speaker 2: he meant, but he was talking about setting those energetic
• 1:13:42
  Speaker 2: boundaries for yourself. Like everybody not supposed to have access
• 1:13:46
  Speaker 2: to you because it's texting on your spirit. It's draining.
• 1:13:50
  Speaker 2: It's draining. Certain phone calls is draining. Hello? Yeah. What's
• 1:13:56
  Speaker 2: going on? They about to tell you some bullshit, some
• 1:13:59
  Speaker 2: bad news. I don't want to hear that shit.
• 1:14:01
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:14:02
  Speaker 2: Maybe that's my ego. You act like you don't care.
• 1:14:05
  Speaker 2: I don't. It's not that I don't give a fuck.
• 1:14:09
  Speaker 2: I could just give a fuck less. Yeah. I care
• 1:14:12
  Speaker 2: about me. Right. Fuck that. I don't want to hear
• 1:14:16
  Speaker 2: that shit. Damn.
• 1:14:17
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's so true, man.
• 1:14:19
  Speaker 2: Because a person that don't.
• 1:14:19
  Speaker 1: You'll take it on.
• 1:14:21
  Speaker 2: A person that don't. You're not doing the work every day.
• 1:14:24
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:14:24
  Speaker 2: So it's like. I'm doing the work every day. So
• 1:14:29
  Speaker 2: a person that's not doing the work every day, it's
• 1:14:31
  Speaker 2: really nothing you could tell me because I'm doing the
• 1:14:34
  Speaker 2: work every day. Like I go weeks sometime without eating
• 1:14:38
  Speaker 2: when I'm fasting, when I need clarity. I just stop eating.
• 1:14:41
  Speaker 2: Three days in, no food. You wouldn't even go three hours.
• 1:14:44
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:14:45
  Speaker 2: I'm hungry. I have a headache. That's your body detoxing.
• 1:14:49
  Speaker 2: So I don't even listen to people like that. Yeah. Oh, yeah.
• 1:14:53
  Speaker 2: Don't care.
• 1:14:54
  Speaker 1: People get all fattened out or whatever they cook. Yeah,
• 1:14:57
  Speaker 1: people just wasting your time.
• 1:14:58
  Speaker 2: I mean, food could be used as a drug sometimes.
• 1:15:02
  Speaker 2: Sometimes food could be used as a coping mechanism because
• 1:15:05
  Speaker 2: I used to use food as a coping mechanism. Sometimes
• 1:15:07
  Speaker 2: I'd overeat or sometimes I wouldn't eat.
• 1:15:10
  Speaker 1: What would your snack be if you had a destined,
• 1:15:12
  Speaker 1: like an evening snack, nighttime snack, goodnight Kevin or whatever snack?
• 1:15:17
  Speaker 2: Now or then?
• 1:15:18
  Speaker 1: Back then.
• 1:15:19
  Speaker 2: I used to drink a lot of syrup.
• 1:15:21
  Speaker 1: Straight syrup?
• 1:15:22
  Speaker 2: No, I used to mix it with like, The pineapple
• 1:15:28
  Speaker 2: sun kiss. That's when Activist was out. I used it
• 1:15:31
  Speaker 2: like the cough syrup. I used to mix it with
• 1:15:33
  Speaker 2: pineapple sun kiss, Sprite, and Mountain Dew. Them was my favorites.
• 1:15:37
  Speaker 1: Damn, and some syrup?
• 1:15:38
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:15:39
  Speaker 1: What kind of low cabin light or whatever? Uh-uh.
• 1:15:42
  Speaker 2: And then I used to have to eat. What was
• 1:15:46
  Speaker 2: my favorite thing to eat? I liked them little Uncrustables.
• 1:15:51
  Speaker 2: With the peanut butter and jelly? I liked them. And
• 1:15:55
  Speaker 2: what else I used to eat? Something else I used
• 1:15:59
  Speaker 2: to eat all the time.
• 1:16:02
  Speaker 1: Doritos maybe or something?
• 1:16:04
  Speaker 2: I don't know if it was chicken wings. It was something.
• 1:16:08
  Speaker 2: I forgot. It was something I used to eat all
• 1:16:11
  Speaker 2: the time. I forgot. I know it was unhealthy, whatever
• 1:16:14
  Speaker 2: it was.
• 1:16:14
  Speaker 1: But you're talking about drugs.
• 1:16:16
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I used to do drugs.
• 1:16:16
  Speaker 1: Codeine syrup.
• 1:16:17
  Speaker 2: Yeah, codeine.
• 1:16:18
  Speaker 1: I didn't know what you were talking about at first.
• 1:16:19
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:16:20
  Speaker 1: Wow, and you were addicted to it.
• 1:16:22
  Speaker 2: I ain't going to say addicted, but I didn't like it.
• 1:16:25
  Speaker 2: I loved it. Yeah. Yeah, I loved.
• 1:16:30
  Speaker 1: It.
• 1:16:30
  Speaker 2: I never went to rehab either. You didn't? Rehab's for quitters.
• 1:16:37
  Speaker 2: I'm not trying to quit.
• 1:16:38
  Speaker 1: But you don't do that anymore, though.
• 1:16:40
  Speaker 2: Because I found a new drug, fitness, my new drug
• 1:16:44
  Speaker 2: of choice.
• 1:16:46
  Speaker 1: Do you notice, though, are you able to notice a
• 1:16:48
  Speaker 1: different feeling of how much different you feel making those choices?
• 1:16:52
  Speaker 2: Yes, I'm going to be honest. And I hate to
• 1:16:55
  Speaker 2: say what I'm about to say. When people be like,
• 1:16:59
  Speaker 2: I miss the old Kevin, I get it. Because I
• 1:17:02
  Speaker 2: miss the old Eminem when he was on drugs. That's
• 1:17:05
  Speaker 2: the Eminem I like. That's the Eminem I like. I
• 1:17:09
  Speaker 2: like the Eminem that was on drugs. So I know
• 1:17:12
  Speaker 2: what people mean when they, man, I miss the old Kevin.
• 1:17:15
  Speaker 2: I'm like, I get it. I get it. Because I
• 1:17:20
  Speaker 2: miss him, too.
• 1:17:21
  Speaker 3: I do.
• 1:17:21
  Speaker 2: But I'm not about to sacrifice the way I feel
• 1:17:24
  Speaker 2: for that. Like, I love the way I'm at now.
• 1:17:29
  Speaker 1: Well, I think that's a trap, too, is to stay
• 1:17:31
  Speaker 1: where you are. You know, it's a trap.
• 1:17:33
  Speaker 2: Man, you can grow with me or you can grow
• 1:17:35
  Speaker 2: without me. But either way, it's on with and up
• 1:17:37
  Speaker 2: with me. But I do get it, though, when people say, man,
• 1:17:40
  Speaker 2: I miss the old Kevin. Because I miss the old Eminem.
• 1:17:43
  Speaker 2: I do. I miss the old Eminem. I swear to
• 1:17:46
  Speaker 2: God I do.
• 1:17:47
  Speaker 1: Oh, yeah, I believe that. I miss, there's times in
• 1:17:50
  Speaker 1: my own life that I miss. There's times in my
• 1:17:51
  Speaker 1: own life where I felt like I was funnier or
• 1:17:53
  Speaker 1: like had better ideas and stuff, but things just change
• 1:17:56
  Speaker 1: and sometimes it's different.
• 1:17:57
  Speaker 2: Nah, I like where I'm at now. Yeah? I like
• 1:18:00
  Speaker 2: where I'm at now. Man, I'm a motherfucking supermodel, man.
• 1:18:04
  Speaker 2: I love where I'm at now. This shit different now.
• 1:18:07
  Speaker 2: I used to couldn't even do the wheel, the ab wheel.
• 1:18:09
  Speaker 2: Now I do that shit effortless. Really? I go jogging
• 1:18:12
  Speaker 2: in the morning effortless. It's just automatic. When I stretch,
• 1:18:15
  Speaker 2: it's effortless. When I f * * * my bitch,
• 1:18:19
  Speaker 2: it's just effortless. Wow. And I just, I do everything better.
• 1:18:23
  Speaker 2: And I hate to say what I just said, but
• 1:18:25
  Speaker 2: it's the God honest truth. I just, I wouldn't change
• 1:18:27
  Speaker 2: just for the world. It was time to drink and serve.
• 1:18:30
  Speaker 2: My dick wouldn't even get hard. Oh, yeah. And not
• 1:18:32
  Speaker 2: to get off on no sexual related type, but I
• 1:18:34
  Speaker 2: had erectile dysfunction at 20, what, 23, 24 years old. Yeah.
• 1:18:39
  Speaker 2: Because of all the drugs I was doing. So, I'm okay.
• 1:18:42
  Speaker 1: Oh.
• 1:18:44
  Speaker 2: Never trade that for this I love where I'm at
• 1:18:47
  Speaker 2: now I can sing better like my singing voice has
• 1:18:51
  Speaker 2: matured now because I'm not on drugs so I I
• 1:18:55
  Speaker 2: love where I'm at now the music that I make
• 1:18:57
  Speaker 2: is I make music that I can work out in
• 1:18:59
  Speaker 2: the gym too now so I you know not other
• 1:19:02
  Speaker 2: I get it though I get it I understand yeah
• 1:19:06
  Speaker 2: but I don't care but I understand yeah yeah I
• 1:19:11
  Speaker 2: miss the old Gates, yeah.
• 1:19:13
  Speaker 1: Oh, dude.
• 1:19:13
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I think. Great.
• 1:19:15
  Speaker 1: But I think the new Gates is really prophetic. I
• 1:19:21
  Speaker 1: think the new Gates says some things that are really.
• 1:19:23
  Speaker 2: Man, yo, bro. I love you, bro. You scaring me
• 1:19:27
  Speaker 2: right now.
• 1:19:27
  Speaker 1: I am? Yeah.
• 1:19:29
  Speaker 2: Sorry. I don't want to be a prophet. Okay, I won't.
• 1:19:33
  Speaker 2: That's scary. Yeah, that's true. That's scary when you say
• 1:19:38
  Speaker 2: shit like that, like. You know, that's crazy. Like, you
• 1:19:43
  Speaker 2: the first person that I ever sat in front of
• 1:19:45
  Speaker 2: that said that to me. Like, thank you. I love
• 1:19:50
  Speaker 2: you for being able to see me. But that's scary.
• 1:19:54
  Speaker 1: Yeah, maybe that's unnecessary kind of like.
• 1:19:56
  Speaker 2: And I don't mean it like that. It's somebody else
• 1:19:58
  Speaker 2: that when they see this, they're going to be like, see,
• 1:20:00
  Speaker 2: I told you. Because there's some people that argue with
• 1:20:03
  Speaker 2: me like, I told you he was a prophet. I'm like,
• 1:20:04
  Speaker 2: but prophets are perfect. I'm not perfect.
• 1:20:09
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, I don't think that.
• 1:20:12
  Speaker 2: I wouldn't have made it in the book. It's a
• 1:20:14
  Speaker 2: good thing I wasn't around Jesus. I'd have made us
• 1:20:17
  Speaker 2: look bad.
• 1:20:18
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Instead of a disciple, you didn't need a disciple.
• 1:20:21
  Speaker 2: I'd have made us look bad.
• 1:20:22
  Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying? In general, most religious traditions
• 1:20:26
  Speaker 1: do not consider prophets to be perfect in the sense
• 1:20:29
  Speaker 1: of being entirely free from error or sin. While they're
• 1:20:32
  Speaker 1: often revered for the divine connection and ability to convey
• 1:20:35
  Speaker 1: God's message, there's still a lot of pressure. I just like, man,
• 1:20:38
  Speaker 1: I like the new bars you have just as much
• 1:20:40
  Speaker 1: as the old bars, man. That's what I like.
• 1:20:42
  Speaker 2: Hey, at least somebody cares.
• 1:20:44
  Speaker 1: That's what I like, too.
• 1:20:45
  Speaker 2: At least somebody cares. But it's just, and it's not
• 1:20:50
  Speaker 2: to say that you wrong for saying that. It's just
• 1:20:53
  Speaker 2: a few people in my camp, in my circle, they
• 1:20:55
  Speaker 2: be like, you know, you're a prophet, right? And I'm like, no,
• 1:20:58
  Speaker 2: I don't want to be that. And I guess it's
• 1:21:00
  Speaker 2: me shying away from the responsibility of that. I don't
• 1:21:03
  Speaker 2: want that responsibility. If I said something and it helped,
• 1:21:08
  Speaker 2: Take it for what it's worth. I made a bunch
• 1:21:10
  Speaker 2: of mistakes to get, whatever knowledge and wisdom I gave you,
• 1:21:13
  Speaker 2: I made a bunch of mistakes to get to that point.
• 1:21:20
  Speaker 1: How do you be a parent that was different than
• 1:21:22
  Speaker 1: how you was parented? Because that's one of the most
• 1:21:26
  Speaker 1: important things.
• 1:21:27
  Speaker 2: We could go anywhere. We could go anywhere. Because the
• 1:21:32
  Speaker 2: truth hurts, but it heals. So we could go, we
• 1:21:35
  Speaker 2: could have any kind of conversation. What makes me a
• 1:21:38
  Speaker 2: better parent is I was sexually victimized and I didn't
• 1:21:42
  Speaker 2: have a safe place to communicate. I created a space
• 1:21:46
  Speaker 2: for my children to communicate with me. So they say
• 1:21:50
  Speaker 2: when you work on yourself, you heal seven generations backwards
• 1:21:53
  Speaker 2: and seven generations forward. And damn, I hate to say this,
• 1:21:57
  Speaker 2: but somebody before me, they was sexually victimized also. So
• 1:22:05
  Speaker 2: it was like something that, kind of ran in the family.
• 1:22:08
  Speaker 1: Oh, yeah, like a learned behavior or okay, yeah.
• 1:22:10
  Speaker 2: It was like they had went through the same thing.
• 1:22:14
  Speaker 2: And by me creating that space for my children to
• 1:22:18
  Speaker 2: be able to communicate with me, don't nobody never touch you,
• 1:22:22
  Speaker 2: you know, you always talk to me. I don't judge
• 1:22:25
  Speaker 2: my children. As long as you tell me the truth,
• 1:22:26
  Speaker 2: I'm never going to be upset with you no matter
• 1:22:28
  Speaker 2: what it is. I'm here to help you figure it out.
• 1:22:31
  Speaker 2: You know, that's me. So anyway, I broke those generational curses.
• 1:22:36
  Speaker 2: Excuse me, generational traumas, let's say that. They're not generational curse,
• 1:22:40
  Speaker 2: generational traumas. So I broke that. And the reason I
• 1:22:43
  Speaker 2: don't really speak on it, like, because it was, my
• 1:22:49
  Speaker 2: family's still kind of healing from that situation.
• 1:22:51
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's understood.
• 1:22:52
  Speaker 2: Like, me and my mother, we got a beautiful relationship now. Like,
• 1:22:56
  Speaker 2: it's super beautiful. But it was estranged for a while. Yeah.
• 1:22:59
  Speaker 2: Because I wasn't able to communicate. So now it's beautiful
• 1:23:04
  Speaker 2: because we communicate. And me going back and forgiving my
• 1:23:07
  Speaker 2: mother and forgiving myself and things of that nature, you
• 1:23:11
  Speaker 2: got to realize they didn't know what they was doing.
• 1:23:16
  Speaker 2: Nobody handed them a pamphlet and said, this is how
• 1:23:18
  Speaker 2: you rear children. So when they hear shocking news like that,
• 1:23:22
  Speaker 2: the first thing they do is panic. They don't think
• 1:23:25
  Speaker 2: to act. But me, I think to act. I don't
• 1:23:28
  Speaker 2: think to just say, oh, God, that's not how you
• 1:23:32
  Speaker 2: stop bullying. Fighting solves everything. I teach my children that.
• 1:23:37
  Speaker 2: Fighting solves everything. Like, I tell my son, like, if
• 1:23:40
  Speaker 2: you go to school and if somebody say something to you,
• 1:23:43
  Speaker 2: don't worry about that. But if somebody put their hands
• 1:23:45
  Speaker 2: on you, you punch them right in their nose and
• 1:23:48
  Speaker 2: you don't stop. You keep going. When I come to
• 1:23:51
  Speaker 2: the school, I'm going to be like, I can't believe
• 1:23:52
  Speaker 2: you did all this bitch ass shit. I swear to God,
• 1:23:55
  Speaker 2: I'm going to kill your motherfucker. I'm going to do
• 1:23:57
  Speaker 2: all that. I'm going to make it look good when
• 1:23:58
  Speaker 2: I get there. Then after that, I'm going to take
• 1:24:00
  Speaker 2: you and buy you every toy in the store. Because
• 1:24:02
  Speaker 2: fighting solves everything.
• 1:24:05
  Speaker 1: You got it. Yeah, you got it.
• 1:24:07
  Speaker 2: What's that coach at Texas? What did he say? We
• 1:24:11
  Speaker 2: don't raise no pussies.
• 1:24:13
  Speaker 1: Who was that?
• 1:24:14
  Speaker 2: The football guy? Yeah. He said, we don't raise no pussies.
• 1:24:18
  Speaker 1: He died, didn't he?
• 1:24:20
  Speaker 2: I forgot the coach name. I just seen that shit
• 1:24:22
  Speaker 2: one time.
• 1:24:22
  Speaker 1: Woody Allen. Yeah, Michael Leach.
• 1:24:23
  Speaker 2: He was like, we don't raise no pussies. Yeah, yeah.
• 1:24:26
  Speaker 2: But that's just one of my biggest things when I
• 1:24:29
  Speaker 2: can say the way I parent is different. I don't
• 1:24:33
  Speaker 2: parent like that. I parent different.
• 1:24:35
  Speaker 1: Like, will you, like, yeah.
• 1:24:37
  Speaker 2: I parent like Coach Knight. Yeah? But, yeah, I parent
• 1:24:42
  Speaker 2: like Coach Knight. I parent like a coach. Okay. My
• 1:24:48
  Speaker 2: grandfather was like a coach. Like, that tough love, that's
• 1:24:52
  Speaker 2: how I parent.
• 1:24:54
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I think people don't realize, like, how they look
• 1:24:55
  Speaker 1: at their children, too, is important. If you always look
• 1:24:57
  Speaker 1: at your child with, like, will you go do that
• 1:25:00
  Speaker 1: or this is wrong or something, then they, that's, they
• 1:25:03
  Speaker 1: feel like something is always wrong, right? Like, The look
• 1:25:05
  Speaker 1: you put into your child's eyes, like your child is
• 1:25:08
  Speaker 1: kind of like a cup and you're like a pitcher.
• 1:25:09
  Speaker 2: It is accountability going on. Like they have to make
• 1:25:12
  Speaker 2: their beds. They have to go to school. They have
• 1:25:14
  Speaker 2: to do these things. And if not, then you can't
• 1:25:16
  Speaker 2: play the game. Right. You're going to have to take accountability.
• 1:25:18
  Speaker 2: Like my son and my daughter know. And my daughter,
• 1:25:21
  Speaker 2: she's not even 13 yet. She came to me and
• 1:25:23
  Speaker 2: told me, Daddy, is there anything I could help do
• 1:25:27
  Speaker 2: around the house to make your life more easier? Like
• 1:25:30
  Speaker 2: one of her choices is you keep the kitchen clean.
• 1:25:32
  Speaker 2: Still got to make your bed, still got to go
• 1:25:33
  Speaker 2: to school, but you keep the kitchen clean. My son,
• 1:25:35
  Speaker 2: you got to make your bed, still got to go
• 1:25:37
  Speaker 2: to school, but you make sure the trash put out.
• 1:25:40
  Speaker 2: And I just give them little jobs.
• 1:25:41
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:25:42
  Speaker 2: And then you earn your wages.
• 1:25:45
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 1:25:46
  Speaker 2: I pay them $ 250 a week.
• 1:25:48
  Speaker 1: Do you really?
• 1:25:49
  Speaker 2: $ 250?
• 1:25:49
  Speaker 1: Yeah. God dang, bro.
• 1:25:53
  Speaker 2: I pay them $ 250 a week. You want Robux, you
• 1:25:56
  Speaker 2: want that, you know, I pay them. Wow.
• 1:26:01
  Speaker 1: But they work. Oh yeah, they could have a Chevy
• 1:26:03
  Speaker 1: sedan by September. That's a good amount of money.
• 1:26:06
  Speaker 2: Yeah, my daughter, she like into the furry costumes. They
• 1:26:10
  Speaker 2: be dressing up like, don't kill me because I don't
• 1:26:14
  Speaker 2: want to say she real defensive about this. No, dad,
• 1:26:16
  Speaker 2: it's not. That's what it's called. It's called this. I
• 1:26:19
  Speaker 2: don't know the name of it, but they dress up
• 1:26:22
  Speaker 2: like animals. I did it one time with her. Okay.
• 1:26:25
  Speaker 2: And that was my way of like going into her world.
• 1:26:27
  Speaker 2: And she was like, I want to post a video
• 1:26:29
  Speaker 2: that me and you did on TikTok. But I'm scared
• 1:26:32
  Speaker 2: people are going to hate on it. I said, promise
• 1:26:33
  Speaker 2: me you're going to do one thing. She said, what?
• 1:26:36
  Speaker 2: I heard Floyd Mayweather say this. I said, no matter
• 1:26:38
  Speaker 2: what you do, if you do something good, if you
• 1:26:41
  Speaker 2: do something bad, if you do something for yourself or
• 1:26:44
  Speaker 2: you do something for other people, people are going to
• 1:26:46
  Speaker 2: always have something to say about you. So just promise
• 1:26:49
  Speaker 2: me that you're going to make yourself happy. Oh, yeah,
• 1:26:51
  Speaker 2: that's me right there.
• 1:26:52
  Speaker 1: Which one?
• 1:26:53
  Speaker 2: I'm about to come in on the furry. Yeah, that's
• 1:26:54
  Speaker 2: me right there.
• 1:26:55
  Speaker 1: Look. Kevin, yeah, that's beautiful, man.
• 1:26:58
  Speaker 2: Ooh.
• 1:26:59
  Speaker 1: Ooh, wow. And what animal is that?
• 1:27:04
  Speaker 2: I don't know what I was. I think I was
• 1:27:05
  Speaker 2: like a little wolf or something.
• 1:27:07
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's a damn little Cajun wolf.
• 1:27:09
  Speaker 2: And then, so she was afraid to post it. But
• 1:27:13
  Speaker 2: then once she posted it, the shit went viral. Like,
• 1:27:16
  Speaker 2: because she was already lit in the furry community.
• 1:27:18
  Speaker 1: Oh, I see what you're saying.
• 1:27:20
  Speaker 2: I hope I'm saying it right easily if you're watching
• 1:27:22
  Speaker 2: me don't.
• 1:27:23
  Speaker 1: Yeah, young lady, we're just trying to. I love you.
• 1:27:25
  Speaker 1: Your father's just honoring what you guys got going on there.
• 1:27:27
  Speaker 2: But that was my way of going into her world.
• 1:27:30
  Speaker 1: Right. And saying, look, I'm proud of what I do.
• 1:27:32
  Speaker 1: I spend time with my daughter.
• 1:27:33
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, like.
• 1:27:34
  Speaker 1: It's important. I'm proud of them.
• 1:27:36
  Speaker 2: Like, just telling them you love them every day, hugging
• 1:27:39
  Speaker 2: on them and letting them know, hey, I'm proud of you.
• 1:27:41
  Speaker 1: Oh, yeah.
• 1:27:42
  Speaker 2: Like, that reassurance. Oh, dude. They not afraid to make
• 1:27:45
  Speaker 2: me mad. You know what they afraid to do? Disappoint me.
• 1:27:49
  Speaker 2: The same way I'm afraid to disappoint God, they afraid
• 1:27:52
  Speaker 2: to disappoint me.
• 1:27:54
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that relationship is just so important, man. It's so important,
• 1:27:58
  Speaker 1: you know, like. Yeah, I remember. I was so angry
• 1:28:03
  Speaker 1: as a kid, man. I wish I'd had that relationship.
• 1:28:07
  Speaker 2: I used to get angry. Like if I see somebody
• 1:28:10
  Speaker 2: spending time with their father playing basketball, I'd be like, bitches.
• 1:28:13
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:28:14
  Speaker 2: Because I wanted it. But now I am that. And
• 1:28:18
  Speaker 2: then I can't be upset with my real father because
• 1:28:21
  Speaker 2: we had some beautiful times together.
• 1:28:23
  Speaker 1: Oh, yeah.
• 1:28:24
  Speaker 2: We had some beautiful times together. The times we had.
• 1:28:27
  Speaker 1: Yeah. What was a special time? My mom, I remember
• 1:28:30
  Speaker 1: one time, so my mom delivered like newspapers and stuff,
• 1:28:32
  Speaker 1: you know? So one time, I think I got sick.
• 1:28:37
  Speaker 1: as I couldn't go to school but she had to
• 1:28:39
  Speaker 1: work and so I got to go on her route
• 1:28:41
  Speaker 1: with her and she would go and then we took
• 1:28:45
  Speaker 1: a ride we went out to over by Picayune and
• 1:28:48
  Speaker 1: we went they had a Wendy's over there and we
• 1:28:49
  Speaker 1: got a Wendy's sandwich over there and it was like
• 1:28:52
  Speaker 1: the only time I ever remember doing something just me
• 1:28:54
  Speaker 1: and my mom but I remember just everything about it
• 1:28:57
  Speaker 1: how I was sitting what we were doing just We
• 1:29:00
  Speaker 1: had like a nice day together, you know? But I
• 1:29:03
  Speaker 1: had to get sick at school to even just, because
• 1:29:06
  Speaker 1: my mom always had to work. So I'm not like
• 1:29:08
  Speaker 1: whining about it. It's just like, but I remember that
• 1:29:10
  Speaker 1: it was important to me, you know?
• 1:29:12
  Speaker 2: As we get older, sometimes it let us know that
• 1:29:17
  Speaker 2: the act of love that they had coming from where
• 1:29:19
  Speaker 2: we come from was them sacrificing time with us to
• 1:29:24
  Speaker 2: make sure that we had food on the table. Looking
• 1:29:28
  Speaker 2: at it in hindsight, That's a good point. Make me like, damn, like,
• 1:29:31
  Speaker 2: I appreciate you more. Like, even my children understand. Like,
• 1:29:34
  Speaker 2: in October, I'm going on tour. I love y'all, but
• 1:29:38
  Speaker 2: I got to go do this. But I love y'all. Right.
• 1:29:41
  Speaker 2: So I spend as much time as I can with y'all,
• 1:29:44
  Speaker 2: but also I got to go do this in October.
• 1:29:46
  Speaker 2: But I love y'all.
• 1:29:48
  Speaker 1: Yeah, for me to have a new perspective instead of, man,
• 1:29:50
  Speaker 1: I bet my mom didn't want to leave me to
• 1:29:52
  Speaker 1: go to work. Instead, I'm thinking.
• 1:29:54
  Speaker 2: What a parent does. Right. Nobody leaves Earth saying, hey,
• 1:29:57
  Speaker 2: I should have. I wish I could have spent more time.
• 1:30:00
  Speaker 2: throwing the papers out, delivering the papers. Everybody leave, even
• 1:30:04
  Speaker 2: the richest business men on earth, they leave and say,
• 1:30:08
  Speaker 2: I wish I could have spent more time with my family.
• 1:30:10
  Speaker 2: But it's beautiful because it's about balance. And I don't
• 1:30:13
  Speaker 2: beat myself up for the time that I'm not there.
• 1:30:16
  Speaker 2: I understand that they understand because I talk to them.
• 1:30:20
  Speaker 2: I don't baby talk. I talk to them regular.
• 1:30:23
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I think that's the biggest thing is communicating what's
• 1:30:25
  Speaker 1: going on probably, you know. What's different about your tour
• 1:30:30
  Speaker 1: this time? How do you feel about it? Do you
• 1:30:32
  Speaker 1: notice that that changes for you as you grow up?
• 1:30:35
  Speaker 2: What's different about my tour this time?
• 1:30:37
  Speaker 1: Because in October it starts, yeah?
• 1:30:38
  Speaker 2: Me. Me. I'm different. I'm not the same person I
• 1:30:45
  Speaker 2: was last year. I'm better. Okay. Way better. Man, I
• 1:30:53
  Speaker 2: could go down the list, but I could say one
• 1:30:55
  Speaker 2: of the biggest things I started giving myself grace. I
• 1:31:00
  Speaker 2: don't beat myself up no more. I used to beat
• 1:31:04
  Speaker 2: myself up. Yeah.
• 1:31:06
  Speaker 1: What would you say, like, in your head, what would
• 1:31:08
  Speaker 1: that be like, you think?
• 1:31:11
  Speaker 2: I beat myself up. The way I would beat myself
• 1:31:15
  Speaker 2: up is I would replay something I did, and it
• 1:31:17
  Speaker 2: would bring shame until I almost cringe when I think
• 1:31:21
  Speaker 2: about it. Like, no, man. Players, like, I tell myself, like,
• 1:31:27
  Speaker 2: excuse me. You probably don't know this. I talk to myself.
• 1:31:31
  Speaker 2: All geniuses talk to they self. And ever since I
• 1:31:34
  Speaker 2: read that, it kind of gave me the green light
• 1:31:36
  Speaker 2: to start talking to myself more. But if I do something,
• 1:31:40
  Speaker 2: I be like, players fuck up too. Players fuck up too.
• 1:31:44
  Speaker 1: Players do fuck up.
• 1:31:45
  Speaker 2: Players fuck up too. And I always tell myself, I'm like,
• 1:31:48
  Speaker 2: players fuck up too. Learn from your mistakes, don't make
• 1:31:51
  Speaker 2: them anymore. And I talk to myself. I used to
• 1:31:53
  Speaker 2: be hard on myself like a coach. Like, hey, bitch.
• 1:31:57
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 1:31:58
  Speaker 2: But I'm still like a coach in the gym.
• 1:32:00
  Speaker 1: Get in there, bitch.
• 1:32:01
  Speaker 2: I'll be like, hey, the weights ain't going to push
• 1:32:04
  Speaker 2: they self. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? You got
• 1:32:07
  Speaker 2: enough strength to do that, but you ain't got enough
• 1:32:08
  Speaker 2: strength to lift a cup and get up and go
• 1:32:10
  Speaker 2: to the gym. You know what I'm saying? So it's
• 1:32:12
  Speaker 2: just I'm more like motivational toward myself with that. But
• 1:32:21
  Speaker 2: if it's a– because, you know, you have moments that
• 1:32:24
  Speaker 2: might come up from the past and it might just
• 1:32:26
  Speaker 2: come up in your– and your mental inventory. And then
• 1:32:29
  Speaker 2: when it come up, instead of running from it.
• 1:32:30
  Speaker 1: All the time I go like that.
• 1:32:32
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I do that all the time. And then you
• 1:32:34
  Speaker 2: know what I start doing? I sit with it. Man,
• 1:32:37
  Speaker 2: players fuck up too. That shit ain't nothing. You the
• 1:32:40
  Speaker 2: only one remember that. Don't nobody else even remember that shit.
• 1:32:43
  Speaker 1: That's crazy.
• 1:32:44
  Speaker 2: Don't nobody remember that shit.
• 1:32:45
  Speaker 1: The only thing keeping that messed up moment alive is you.
• 1:32:49
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm giving energy to that bullshit. Man, players fuck
• 1:32:52
  Speaker 2: up too. Man, I'm flying.
• 1:32:53
  Speaker 1: Players fuck up too.
• 1:32:54
  Speaker 2: Players fuck up too, man. I might walk out of
• 1:32:57
  Speaker 2: here and trip, but I'm going to make, hey, it's
• 1:32:59
  Speaker 2: going to be a fly. When I trip, I might
• 1:33:01
  Speaker 2: do a little dance move or something. It's going to
• 1:33:03
  Speaker 2: be a fly trip when I trip. Ain't nobody trip
• 1:33:06
  Speaker 2: better than me.
• 1:33:07
  Speaker 1: Yeah, man. That's a really beautiful little trip.
• 1:33:10
  Speaker 2: Players fuck up too.
• 1:33:11
  Speaker 1: Dude, if I see you trip, I'm going to be like, man, players, hey,
• 1:33:14
  Speaker 1: that's graceful, bro.
• 1:33:15
  Speaker 2: Players fuck up too. I'm going to laugh at myself.
• 1:33:17
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:33:18
  Speaker 2: I don't care who see me make a mistake. I've
• 1:33:20
  Speaker 2: been on stage sometime. Make a mistake. Hey, excuse me.
• 1:33:23
  Speaker 2: I just made a mistake. Hey, the beautiful thing about
• 1:33:25
  Speaker 2: mistakes is it's okay for people to see you make
• 1:33:27
  Speaker 2: a mistake. Just don't never let a motherfucker see you quit.
• 1:33:30
  Speaker 2: You're going to watch me make mistakes, but you ain't
• 1:33:32
  Speaker 2: going to never watch me quit. Hell yeah. Like I
• 1:33:36
  Speaker 2: tell people, I still don't get tired. I've been up
• 1:33:41
  Speaker 2: since 3.30. Oh, yeah.
• 1:33:42
  Speaker 1: I've heard that in your song, too.
• 1:33:43
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I still don't get tired. I've been up since
• 1:33:45
  Speaker 2: like 3.30 this morning. Dang.
• 1:33:47
  Speaker 1: Bro, I'm fucking fired up all of a sudden.
• 1:33:51
  Speaker 2: Energy ought to translate to more energy.
• 1:33:54
  Speaker 1: Is that true?
• 1:33:55
  Speaker 2: Yeah, like energy translates to more energy. Now, once I
• 1:33:59
  Speaker 2: go eat my meal, I'm supposed to be having dinner tonight.
• 1:34:05
  Speaker 2: That's what I had on this soup.
• 1:34:06
  Speaker 1: Okay, that's nice.
• 1:34:07
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm supposed to be having dinner. But, uh.
• 1:34:12
  Speaker 2: To me. But, uh....
• 1:34:17
  Speaker 1: You got a date for dinner or no?
• 1:34:18
  Speaker 2: I'm supposed to be having dinner, but after I eat
• 1:34:20
  Speaker 2: that meal, kind of get some good rest.
• 1:34:23
  Speaker 1: Oh, I love that. I love getting a good rest.
• 1:34:26
  Speaker 1: Do you have, I want to ask you a couple
• 1:34:28
  Speaker 1: more things before you go. You have a, you are
• 1:34:31
  Speaker 1: a religious man.
• 1:34:35
  Speaker 2: Religious smidges. Yeah. Religious smidges. But yeah, I guess.
• 1:34:42
  Speaker 1: Or do you feel like, because people say that you're
• 1:34:44
  Speaker 1: a Muslim man.
• 1:34:45
  Speaker 2: I'm going to be honest, I'm spiritual. Okay. I'm spiritual.
• 1:34:49
  Speaker 2: But like the word Muslim in Arabic, it only means believer. Right.
• 1:34:53
  Speaker 2: So I'm a believer, but I'm very spiritual. Got it.
• 1:34:57
  Speaker 2: Like I believe spirituality is if I walk in a
• 1:35:01
  Speaker 2: room and something don't feel right and I leave, something
• 1:35:06
  Speaker 2: bad happen, I believe I was guided by God to leave.
• 1:35:10
  Speaker 2: I done been in a club in New York. I'm like,
• 1:35:13
  Speaker 2: come on, let's go. We go outside. As soon as
• 1:35:15
  Speaker 2: we go outside, a fight break out. somebody to get shot.
• 1:35:19
  Speaker 2: But I just felt like it was time to go.
• 1:35:22
  Speaker 2: And I just always been like that.
• 1:35:24
  Speaker 1: Why do you think it's so hard for us to
• 1:35:25
  Speaker 1: step into what we really believe we want? Because when
• 1:35:28
  Speaker 1: I hear you say that, that's what it hits me as.
• 1:35:30
  Speaker 2: I've been saying that, though. I say it in my song.
• 1:35:33
  Speaker 2: I say when Allah said, my new wife will pray
• 1:35:35
  Speaker 2: together and I'm going to keep her sacred. I say
• 1:35:37
  Speaker 2: that in the song, so I manifested this. I didn't
• 1:35:40
  Speaker 2: know it was going to be her.
• 1:35:41
  Speaker 1: But as men, why do you think it's so hard
• 1:35:43
  Speaker 1: for a lot of men to just Yeah, it's like, man,
• 1:35:47
  Speaker 1: I'm just so tired of everything that's not mean something.
• 1:35:51
  Speaker 2: Because you don't get fulfillment. I done had more holes
• 1:35:54
  Speaker 2: than clothes. I never got no fulfillment from having a
• 1:35:57
  Speaker 2: bunch of different women. That shit is stressful. It's vexating
• 1:36:01
  Speaker 2: to my spirit. It don't give me no fulfillment. A
• 1:36:03
  Speaker 2: lot of men ain't going to say that. And then
• 1:36:05
  Speaker 2: I've been on a semen retention journey for the last, what,
• 1:36:08
  Speaker 2: maybe five years I talked about, like, retaining the life force,
• 1:36:12
  Speaker 2: retaining the semen, not watching porn, not jacking off. taking
• 1:36:16
  Speaker 2: that sexual energy and transmuting it into something else. So
• 1:36:20
  Speaker 2: if I have a craving to go jack off or
• 1:36:23
  Speaker 2: I'm horny or whatever you want to call it, I
• 1:36:25
  Speaker 2: go to the gym or I go to the studio,
• 1:36:27
  Speaker 2: I transmute that energy into something else.
• 1:36:30
  Speaker 1: And most people that's out here jacking off.
• 1:36:34
  Speaker 2: And you realize, though, when you see dudes with a
• 1:36:36
  Speaker 2: lot of women, but them dudes be stressed out. Like,
• 1:36:38
  Speaker 2: you know what I'm saying? As a man, you're going
• 1:36:40
  Speaker 2: to see shit that you're going to look, but at
• 1:36:42
  Speaker 2: the same time, you ain't going to help me on
• 1:36:45
  Speaker 2: my mission. You're going to take away. You ain't going
• 1:36:48
  Speaker 2: to add value to me. You're going to take from me.
• 1:36:52
  Speaker 2: You know, behind closed doors, do you speak life into me?
• 1:36:54
  Speaker 2: Do you help me become greater? Are you helping me
• 1:36:57
  Speaker 2: become greater? Like, it don't really be that. And if
• 1:37:01
  Speaker 2: you are helping me become greater, are you helping me
• 1:37:03
  Speaker 2: become greater for me? Or are you helping me become
• 1:37:06
  Speaker 2: greater for you? Are you manipulating me? Are you verbally
• 1:37:10
  Speaker 2: abusive to me behind closed doors? You know what I'm saying? Like,
• 1:37:13
  Speaker 2: are you using the My flaws against me. You know,
• 1:37:16
  Speaker 2: there's a lot of women that'll do that, too. And no,
• 1:37:18
  Speaker 2: excuse me. I can't say women. It's a lot of
• 1:37:21
  Speaker 2: people that'll do that.
• 1:37:21
  Speaker 1: Oh, for sure.
• 1:37:22
  Speaker 2: Because I done had men do that, too. Like, bring
• 1:37:24
  Speaker 2: up stuff from the past and try to hold it
• 1:37:27
  Speaker 2: against me to keep you within whatever kind of energetic
• 1:37:31
  Speaker 2: construct that they have for you. Because they need your energy.
• 1:37:35
  Speaker 2: Everybody's life is great, but we suffer. So, that's why
• 1:37:39
  Speaker 2: I'm mad with it right now. Like.
• 1:37:42
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that seems to be something that's kind of vexing
• 1:37:44
  Speaker 1: our community.
• 1:37:45
  Speaker 2: I wasn't even going to talk about this, but shit,
• 1:37:48
  Speaker 2: you the one. You got it all.
• 1:37:50
  Speaker 1: Oh, I wasn't even trying to get anything. I'm just
• 1:37:51
  Speaker 1: trying to survive.
• 1:37:52
  Speaker 2: I already know, but it's like this is going to
• 1:37:54
  Speaker 2: be healing for somebody.
• 1:37:55
  Speaker 1: Oh, it's healing for me. That's why I'm curious about it.
• 1:37:57
  Speaker 1: It's like because I'm sick of like, you know, in
• 1:38:00
  Speaker 1: my own life, but also I'm the one keeping me there.
• 1:38:02
  Speaker 1: That's the crazy thing. It's like I have the ability
• 1:38:04
  Speaker 1: to change things, and I do a good job.
• 1:38:06
  Speaker 2: I say in my song, I'm only excited about spiritual things,
• 1:38:09
  Speaker 2: and I swear I can't wait to move on. I'm
• 1:38:13
  Speaker 2: only excited about spiritual things.
• 1:38:15
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I think I'm just amazed sometimes that, I don't know,
• 1:38:19
  Speaker 1: but I'm also, you know, I got a late start sometimes.
• 1:38:22
  Speaker 2: Man.
• 1:38:23
  Speaker 1: I got a late start.
• 1:38:23
  Speaker 2: I'm 39. I just look, you know what I'm saying? Oh, yeah.
• 1:38:27
  Speaker 2: I just don't age. I'm 39, though. So I feel
• 1:38:30
  Speaker 2: like it's never too late. Yeah. It's never too late.
• 1:38:35
  Speaker 2: But when you said that about all the women, that
• 1:38:38
  Speaker 2: shit was draining.
• 1:38:41
  Speaker 1: Yeah, well, just, I have so many of my friends, like,
• 1:38:43
  Speaker 1: I'm going on this date, I don't care. Just like, well,
• 1:38:44
  Speaker 1: what are we doing? And then you have people, it's
• 1:38:47
  Speaker 1: like you're giving yourself away to people And I'm not
• 1:38:49
  Speaker 1: accusing anybody. That's what I'm telling you about myself and
• 1:38:51
  Speaker 1: my own life. And then it's just.
• 1:38:53
  Speaker 2: Tell me about it.
• 1:38:53
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:38:54
  Speaker 2: Tell me about it.
• 1:38:55
  Speaker 1: And it's like, what kind of journey am I making?
• 1:38:56
  Speaker 1: What am I really building here?
• 1:38:58
  Speaker 2: And in another word, once I started operating and looking
• 1:39:01
  Speaker 2: for reciprocation, it shouldn't cost anything. If I fuck with you,
• 1:39:07
  Speaker 2: it shouldn't cost anything. If you fuck with me, it
• 1:39:11
  Speaker 2: shouldn't cost us anything. It should be reciprocated. The energy
• 1:39:15
  Speaker 2: that I'm giving you should be reciprocated. If it's not reciprocated,
• 1:39:18
  Speaker 2: then you're not nobody that I even need to know.
• 1:39:20
  Speaker 2: And a lot of times, when you look at relationships,
• 1:39:26
  Speaker 2: I could be somebody's best friend, but they're not my
• 1:39:28
  Speaker 2: best friend. It's not the energy not being reciprocated. And
• 1:39:33
  Speaker 2: a lot of people are victims of that, being in
• 1:39:36
  Speaker 2: relationships that are one-sided. The door don't really swing both ways.
• 1:39:40
  Speaker 2: It may look like it swing both ways, but it don't.
• 1:39:45
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's just a trap, too. I mean, a lot
• 1:39:46
  Speaker 1: of the sex, the dating, just the pornography, because that's
• 1:39:50
  Speaker 1: been something I've dealt with, you know?
• 1:39:51
  Speaker 2: When you stop watching porn, it's going to change everything. Yeah.
• 1:39:55
  Speaker 2: It's going to change the way you have sex. Once
• 1:39:57
  Speaker 2: you realize these people acting, this is fake. Yeah. This
• 1:40:00
  Speaker 2: is not real. This is not a connection. This is bullshit.
• 1:40:04
  Speaker 2: No disrespect to people that do porn.
• 1:40:06
  Speaker 1: But they know it. They know it's fake.
• 1:40:08
  Speaker 2: That's just not my cup of tea. That just ain't no... Like,
• 1:40:12
  Speaker 2: how a man told me, he was like, You jacking
• 1:40:15
  Speaker 2: off to another man's success. Like, I ain't fucking that bitch.
• 1:40:19
  Speaker 1: Dang, that's crazy.
• 1:40:20
  Speaker 2: God.
• 1:40:21
  Speaker 1: Oh, my God.
• 1:40:22
  Speaker 2: I'm jacking off to watching another man's success. I'm not
• 1:40:25
  Speaker 2: doing this.
• 1:40:26
  Speaker 1: It is kind of crazy, huh? When you think about that.
• 1:40:28
  Speaker 2: If you really think about it, it's psychotic in nature.
• 1:40:32
  Speaker 2: And then you got to hide and sneak to do it. Oh.
• 1:40:35
  Speaker 2: They got some people probably just go do it publicly, but.
• 1:40:38
  Speaker 1: I ain't doing that.
• 1:40:38
  Speaker 2: You got to sneak and do it. Yeah, I sneak
• 1:40:40
  Speaker 2: and do it. And then under the guise of I'm
• 1:40:42
  Speaker 2: having me time.
• 1:40:42
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:40:43
  Speaker 2: But then after you do it. You feel guilty.
• 1:40:46
  Speaker 1: You feel horrible.
• 1:40:47
  Speaker 2: Like, damn, why I did that? Because that was precious
• 1:40:50
  Speaker 2: life for us. I just wasted it on somebody else's success.
• 1:40:53
  Speaker 1: God dang it.
• 1:40:56
  Speaker 2: Listen, I've been there. I've been there. I know about it,
• 1:40:58
  Speaker 2: so I've been there.
• 1:40:59
  Speaker 1: And what was the thing that got you out of that? Like,
• 1:41:01
  Speaker 1: how'd you able to stop that specifically?
• 1:41:03
  Speaker 2: I took baby steps. I was like, I'm only going
• 1:41:06
  Speaker 2: to release on Fridays. Okay.
• 1:41:09
  Speaker 1: Shabbat shaboom, huh?
• 1:41:10
  Speaker 2: And I started saying, well, maybe this is my creative energy.
• 1:41:16
  Speaker 2: When you release your life force, that's your creative energy.
• 1:41:19
  Speaker 2: So I'm not going to release my creative energy. Like
• 1:41:22
  Speaker 2: when you boxing, are you preparing for a fight? While
• 1:41:25
  Speaker 2: I'm working on this album, I ain't going to release
• 1:41:27
  Speaker 2: no semen. While I'm doing this, I ain't going to release.
• 1:41:29
  Speaker 2: And I became better and better and better. But it
• 1:41:32
  Speaker 2: was baby steps. I ain't just start off just saying
• 1:41:34
  Speaker 2: cold turkey. But by the time it was like, man.
• 1:41:38
  Speaker 1: Semen has babies in it, which is crazy. And you
• 1:41:41
  Speaker 1: taking baby steps.
• 1:41:42
  Speaker 2: If I ain't getting no pussy, then that's wrong. If
• 1:41:46
  Speaker 2: I ain't get no pussy shit, I ain't no shit.
• 1:41:48
  Speaker 1: Yeah, what am I doing?
• 1:41:49
  Speaker 2: I can wait.
• 1:41:50
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I can wait. That's the thing. It's just that
• 1:41:52
  Speaker 1: relationship with yourself, you know, and having conversations with yourself. Like,
• 1:41:56
  Speaker 1: what am I doing? What would I really like to do?
• 1:41:59
  Speaker 1: And then how do I get through this?
• 1:42:00
  Speaker 2: You respect yourself different.
• 1:42:01
  Speaker 1: Yeah, your integrity changes a lot.
• 1:42:02
  Speaker 2: Like, I respect myself different now that I don't even
• 1:42:05
  Speaker 2: play around like that.
• 1:42:06
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:42:06
  Speaker 2: I respect myself different now.
• 1:42:08
  Speaker 1: And when you show up, people can see. Here's the
• 1:42:10
  Speaker 1: funny thing. People can see you. The integrity you have
• 1:42:13
  Speaker 1: for yourself.
• 1:42:13
  Speaker 2: You know what people tell me? They say your aura
• 1:42:16
  Speaker 2: is big. I'm like, I don't know why. And they
• 1:42:21
  Speaker 2: were like, what kind of practices do you do? I said,
• 1:42:23
  Speaker 2: I practice semen retention. Yeah. It's my precious life force.
• 1:42:27
  Speaker 2: And they was like, that's what it is. You have
• 1:42:30
  Speaker 2: a glow. That's bad. Yeah.
• 1:42:33
  Speaker 1: I said, semen, damn.
• 1:42:35
  Speaker 2: It's your life force. Oh, yeah.
• 1:42:37
  Speaker 1: It's everything you are. It's your truth. It's your script. Yeah.
• 1:42:41
  Speaker 1: And it's not even your script, it's a script of
• 1:42:43
  Speaker 1: all your ancestors.
• 1:42:44
  Speaker 2: Just wasting it in a sock.
• 1:42:46
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you blasting it out here in a dang church
• 1:42:49
  Speaker 1: sock too at times, God.
• 1:42:51
  Speaker 2: Oh my God. I forgive myself.
• 1:42:54
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you right, man. Because sometimes I'll have that shame feeling.
• 1:42:57
  Speaker 2: All the misfires, I forgive myself. Yeah. We learn from
• 1:43:01
  Speaker 2: our mistakes, we move on. But somebody needed to hear this.
• 1:43:06
  Speaker 1: No, I think somebody did today. And I think, you
• 1:43:07
  Speaker 1: know what, I think it's like, We need more leaders
• 1:43:10
  Speaker 1: in the community to say things like that. We have
• 1:43:13
  Speaker 1: to get, I don't know, we got to do something
• 1:43:15
  Speaker 1: has to start to be different, I feel like.
• 1:43:17
  Speaker 2: The greatest teachers teach without teaching.
• 1:43:20
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you're right.
• 1:43:21
  Speaker 2: The greatest teachers teach without teaching. So when the student
• 1:43:24
  Speaker 2: is ready to learn, the teacher will appeal. You'll be
• 1:43:27
  Speaker 2: amazed what wisdom could come from. Yeah. Even the homeless
• 1:43:30
  Speaker 2: person standing on the street corner, it smelled bad. The
• 1:43:34
  Speaker 2: person that you would be afraid of, the person that
• 1:43:36
  Speaker 2: you would look down upon, one of those people. the
• 1:43:39
  Speaker 2: wisdom and the knowledge that they can impute, you would
• 1:43:42
  Speaker 2: be amazed.
• 1:43:45
  Speaker 1: Oh, yeah, they got bars over there.
• 1:43:47
  Speaker 2: I don't care what you do with the money. I
• 1:43:50
  Speaker 2: committed to act a given. He's just going to buy
• 1:43:52
  Speaker 2: drugs with it. I committed to act a given. Whatever
• 1:43:54
  Speaker 2: he do, that's his choice. Now, one lady made me mad, though,
• 1:43:57
  Speaker 2: because she was holding a sign talking about she had
• 1:44:00
  Speaker 2: worked for food, and I gave her a sandwich, and
• 1:44:02
  Speaker 2: she put it in her book set. And then I said,
• 1:44:05
  Speaker 2: you know what? Maybe she had children to go feed
• 1:44:10
  Speaker 2: But I don't know.
• 1:44:11
  Speaker 1: Yeah. What do you think? Is she going to sell
• 1:44:13
  Speaker 1: it or something?
• 1:44:14
  Speaker 2: Maybe you had children to go feed or something. So
• 1:44:17
  Speaker 2: I was like, I did overreact because I got pissed off.
• 1:44:19
  Speaker 1: Kevin, not everybody eats immediately when you serve them.
• 1:44:22
  Speaker 2: I mean, you know, maybe she was saving it for later.
• 1:44:24
  Speaker 2: I don't know.
• 1:44:25
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Maybe she got baby birds in a nest or something.
• 1:44:27
  Speaker 2: I don't know. Maybe she got saving it for her
• 1:44:29
  Speaker 2: kids or something. And I just said, you know what?
• 1:44:31
  Speaker 2: I ain't tripping. Whatever you do with it is on you.
• 1:44:33
  Speaker 2: I committed an act of giving.
• 1:44:35
  Speaker 1: Probably so, Kevin. I bet. Yeah, I think she probably
• 1:44:38
  Speaker 1: was doing something nice, hopefully.
• 1:44:40
  Speaker 2: I hope so.
• 1:44:41
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I bet she was.
• 1:44:42
  Speaker 2: I hope you didn't take advantage of me. But if
• 1:44:45
  Speaker 2: you did, that's your carmatic bag.
• 1:44:46
  Speaker 1: Right, I did what I did.
• 1:44:47
  Speaker 2: I did the right thing.
• 1:44:48
  Speaker 1: Right, I did what I did. Yeah, kind of like, man,
• 1:44:50
  Speaker 1: I think one interesting thing is like, yeah, we got
• 1:44:55
  Speaker 1: to have leaders making things cool, you know? I think
• 1:44:59
  Speaker 1: it's why it's one, to me, and this might be,
• 1:45:02
  Speaker 1: I guess I'm afraid to say this probably because it's probably.
• 1:45:06
  Speaker 2: Ready, set, go.
• 1:45:07
  Speaker 1: I think it's cool to have a black man say
• 1:45:10
  Speaker 1: something about that because black people notoriously, I feel like,
• 1:45:13
  Speaker 1: make things cool, right? Like people go to the black
• 1:45:16
  Speaker 1: community to make something cool. Like you give a metal
• 1:45:19
  Speaker 1: plate to somebody in a black community, the next thing
• 1:45:21
  Speaker 1: they got a rim out of it. You know what
• 1:45:23
  Speaker 1: I'm saying? They make things cool. So I think to hear.
• 1:45:25
  Speaker 2: A black guy. Creativity thrives in the darkness. Okay. Well said.
• 1:45:30
  Speaker 2: You didn't say anything wrong. Okay.
• 1:45:32
  Speaker 1: So I think to hear a black guy say that
• 1:45:34
  Speaker 1: to act certain ways, I think that makes it cool
• 1:45:38
  Speaker 1: because we all take, I feel like a lot of
• 1:45:40
  Speaker 1: culture comes from, what's cool comes from the black community.
• 1:45:45
  Speaker 2: Creativity thrives in the darkness. So you're not saying nothing wrong. Okay.
• 1:45:49
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I think it's, yeah, it makes it cool, you know,
• 1:45:53
  Speaker 1: and we need things that, like, I think have moral
• 1:45:56
  Speaker 1: value and integrity to be cool.
• 1:45:58
  Speaker 2: Like, I watch anime because they have more moralistic value
• 1:46:03
  Speaker 2: than regular movies.
• 1:46:05
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:46:06
  Speaker 2: So I watch a lot of anime.
• 1:46:08
  Speaker 1: I don't watch a lot of it. Israel Adesanya watches
• 1:46:10
  Speaker 1: a lot of it. You know who he is, the
• 1:46:12
  Speaker 1: UFC fighter?
• 1:46:13
  Speaker 2: The last style bender.
• 1:46:14
  Speaker 1: Yeah, he's incredible, dude.
• 1:46:15
  Speaker 2: The last style bender, yeah.
• 1:46:18
  Speaker 1: You and him would be such a neat. I mean,
• 1:46:20
  Speaker 1: you guys are both humans, so whatever. I don't know
• 1:46:23
  Speaker 1: what I'm talking about. I'm trying to think of anything
• 1:46:26
  Speaker 1: else we want to talk about. You have a new
• 1:46:27
  Speaker 1: tour coming up.
• 1:46:28
  Speaker 2: Yeah, a new tour coming up. I got coffee.
• 1:46:31
  Speaker 1: You had a new album that came out on my birthday,
• 1:46:33
  Speaker 1: I think, March 19th or something. You had one come out?
• 1:46:36
  Speaker 1: I'm him too.
• 1:46:37
  Speaker 2: I'm him too.
• 1:46:37
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm trying to think, is there anything else that
• 1:46:40
  Speaker 1: you wanted to talk about today?
• 1:46:43
  Speaker 2: If anybody watched this and they gained any insight, I'm
• 1:46:50
  Speaker 2: grateful for that. If you didn't gain any insight, I
• 1:46:54
  Speaker 2: could give a fuck less. That's fair. That's it, that's all.
• 1:47:00
  Speaker 1: That's it, that's all.
• 1:47:01
  Speaker 2: Whenever I drop an album, I'm like, get it. If
• 1:47:04
  Speaker 2: you want to get it, if you don't, don't get it. Like,
• 1:47:07
  Speaker 2: I'm not here to force you. If you want to
• 1:47:09
  Speaker 2: get it, if you don't want to get it, don't
• 1:47:11
  Speaker 2: get it. It's already going to do what it's going
• 1:47:12
  Speaker 2: to do. Yeah. I didn't do, I can say this,
• 1:47:16
  Speaker 2: this album that I put out, this last one, I
• 1:47:20
  Speaker 2: was proud of it. Usually I'm upset when a project
• 1:47:25
  Speaker 2: come out, I'm like, I wasn't happy at this and
• 1:47:28
  Speaker 2: this and that whenever a release. But this time I
• 1:47:31
  Speaker 2: was like, I celebrated myself the whole way through. And
• 1:47:34
  Speaker 2: I was like, man, I love this project. Like, out
• 1:47:37
  Speaker 2: of my other projects, I go back and appreciate them
• 1:47:39
  Speaker 2: after the next one come out. But not this one.
• 1:47:41
  Speaker 2: I'm like, nah, I fuck with this one all the
• 1:47:43
  Speaker 2: way through.
• 1:47:44
  Speaker 1: Why do you think that was?
• 1:47:45
  Speaker 2: Because I'm in a different space. Like, I don't make
• 1:47:49
  Speaker 2: depression music anymore. And then if I do make depression music,
• 1:47:54
  Speaker 2: I'm just venting. It's my therapeutic release. I got it
• 1:47:57
  Speaker 2: all out. I know there's somebody out there that can
• 1:48:00
  Speaker 2: relate to what I'm going through, but this is how
• 1:48:02
  Speaker 2: we combat that. It's onward and upward. That's it. That's all.
• 1:48:06
  Speaker 2: I don't stay stuck in a sunken place. Nah.
• 1:48:09
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't stay stuck in a sunken place. I
• 1:48:12
  Speaker 1: don't stay stuck in a sunken place. Amen.
• 1:48:14
  Speaker 2: I'm going to snap out of it quick. That's it.
• 1:48:16
  Speaker 1: Nothing changes. changes if nothing changes, they say.
• 1:48:21
  Speaker 2: Nothing changes if nothing changes. Yes, sir.
• 1:48:24
  Speaker 1: Kevin Gates, man, the pride of Louisiana. Thank you so much, man,
• 1:48:28
  Speaker 1: for spending time with me today, man. It's a blessing.
• 1:48:30
  Speaker 1: I really appreciate it.
• 1:48:31
  Speaker 2: Thank you for having me. And I just want to
• 1:48:33
  Speaker 2: tell you this sincerely. I mean it sincerely. Thank you
• 1:48:36
  Speaker 2: for being you. This was like the most different. type
• 1:48:40
  Speaker 2: of interview, podcast, whatever you want to call it. It
• 1:48:43
  Speaker 2: was just like, we was just talking shit. But it
• 1:48:47
  Speaker 2: was beautiful because not too many people could see me,
• 1:48:52
  Speaker 2: like really see me. Yeah. And I just appreciate you
• 1:48:55
  Speaker 2: for that. Usually when I go places, I have to
• 1:48:57
  Speaker 2: meet the person at the level of the person. I
• 1:49:00
  Speaker 2: had to see where they at and just, but with this,
• 1:49:03
  Speaker 2: it was like the transparency was beautiful. It was refreshing
• 1:49:07
  Speaker 2: talking to you. Like I lost track of time. If
• 1:49:09
  Speaker 2: you ever watch when I go other places, I have
• 1:49:12
  Speaker 2: to meet the person at the level they at. And
• 1:49:15
  Speaker 2: I hate what I'm about to say, but it's the truth.
• 1:49:17
  Speaker 2: I look at my watch to keep time. I didn't
• 1:49:19
  Speaker 2: do that one time, though, because it was refreshing. It
• 1:49:23
  Speaker 2: was refreshing.
• 1:49:24
  Speaker 1: Well, I appreciate you sharing yourself with the world, sharing
• 1:49:26
  Speaker 1: what's going on in your head and your spirit with
• 1:49:28
  Speaker 1: the world, man. It's been some of the things you
• 1:49:30
  Speaker 1: say make me think, and I appreciate that. Because I
• 1:49:33
  Speaker 1: think me taking time to think is more important than...
• 1:49:38
  Speaker 1: than I knew it needed to be for myself. Yeah.
• 1:49:43
  Speaker 1: So thank you very much, Mr. Gates.
• 1:49:45
  Speaker 2: Thank you for having me.
• 1:49:46
  Speaker 3: Now I'm just floating on the breeze And I feel
• 1:49:50
  Speaker 3: I'm falling like these leaves I must be cornerstone Oh,
• 1:49:58
  Speaker 3: but when I reach that ground I'll share this peace
• 1:50:01
  Speaker 3: of mind I found I can feel it in my
• 1:50:05
  Speaker 3: bones
• 1:50:08
  Speaker 2: Amen.