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How to Turn Fear into Fuel and Live Fully · Candid Coach Conversations

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Hi, welcome to Candid Coach Conversations.
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I'm Kimberly, founder of Live Life Fully,
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and today I have with me certified Live Life Fully coach,
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Savannah. Hi, Savannah.
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Thank you. Hi. Thank you so much for having me back.
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So I know that you and I have been talking lately about being ready
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and waiting to be ready.
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Yes.
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And so I've thought more about our conversations and I would love to hear from
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you today about the whole stop.
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Like stop waiting to be ready and how.
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How to stop waiting to be ready.
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~
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goodness, that is such a great,
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great topic. And it's so important because the longer you wait,
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the more the more that passes you by.
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And
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Hmm.
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it is it is so much about living living life fully.
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It really is. And for me it took it took
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Earning my confidence or getting my confidence by looking at what
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I wanted to accomplish, how I wanted to accomplish,
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how I wanted to show up for me,
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for my family, for my friends,
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for my loved ones. And once I finally realized just how important all of that
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is to me, I finally said, okay,
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enough's enough. I've got to get out there and I've got to do this.
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The the embarrassment doesn't matter.
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The fear doesn't matter.
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All of that serves now as motivation.
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So it I still have that stopping point sometimes,
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and I then have really great people in my life who say,
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okay, Savannah, let's talk about what's stopping you.
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What is holding you back?
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And that's when I take a look at the hard things and I s and I say to myself,
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I'm the one holding me back. Me.
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Only me.
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Okay, so so then what I'm hearing is like if you're gonna work on something
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or you wanna do something, maybe it's a goal or a dream,
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a project, a task, and then you know what you wanna do,
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and yet you stop, and you're
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Mm-hmm.
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saying, like you've been stopping.
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What I think I'm hearing is that you've been stopping because you wanna make sure
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you're ready. And you wanna have everything
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Right. I do.
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just so.
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Mm-hmm.
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And so to stop waiting that fear or the embarrassment or the uncertainty,
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you've decided to use that as fuel to push you.
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Mm.
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I have. I have.
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Okay, and so I don't know
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I don't know. I guess I wanna know how.
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How have like if you recognize that you've got fear or there's uncertainty
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or this whole thing about, it's so embarrassing,
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like how do you turn that into fuel?
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I look at the others that came before me.
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So in business coaching, our you know,
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the woman who the person that we're y we're we're using to help us with
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our business coaching, she she made the comment of,
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I'm I'm afraid that people are gonna take a look at me and say,
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Okay, she's too overweight. Well,
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that's something that I've struggled with.
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And I've used that in the past and it never
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It still didn't work out. So it doesn't really matter.
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Doesn't matter what I look like.
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It matters the content. You know,
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it's kind it's it's kinda like what MLK said.
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Not the the color of their skin,
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but the content of their character.
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I have a lot of really good things to say.
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I have a lot of really good things to offer.
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And if I wait until I am my hair is the right length,
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or my hair is the fluffiest, or my my skin is the clearest,
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or
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I'm down X amount of pounds. I will be waiting for the rest of my life to begin.
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I'm not getting any younger. And
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Yeah.
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I finally decided, doesn't matter.
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Do the first thing. So I I have found that I've started putting
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out my newsletters. I put out a newsletter once a week on Wednesdays,
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and I thought, how can I reach more
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So I've started scheduling them to go out on Facebook.
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And I'm
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Okay.
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finding that I'm getting more feedback.
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And I'm getting feedback from people that I didn't know were actually reading them.
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no.
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Yes. My my husband's cousin, when we saw each other earlier,
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I guess it was late last year after my father in law passed,
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she told me, she said, Savannah,
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she's like, I love your your daily
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affirmations basically what what I was putting out on on Facebook and I said,
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Well thank you. I said I didn't I didn't realize anybody was actually looking
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at those. And she said, no, I look at them every day.
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I just don't comment. I was like,
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well that makes me feel so good.
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Thank you so much. I will that that gives me motivation to continue to do it.
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And I I I'm no longer doing the daily affirmations.
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I'm doing the weekly newsletters that have more information and
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It's a little bit of me that I give to others.
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It's a little bit of wisdom that I give to others.
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And it's no longer embarrassing.
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So I'm so curious, Savannah, what was embarrassing?
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Like before you started sending out your newsletter,
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it sounds like you wanted to do it,
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something was there, you were hesitant.
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What was the embarrassing piece?
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To be seen as not, I'm not gonna say perfect,
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because nobody's perfect, obviously.
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To be seen as someone thinking,
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well, how does she know anything?
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What does she know? I know my own life.
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I know the things that I can I can give to other people.
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I know the things that I can bring to other people through my own coaching,
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through my own, you know, working with other coaches and listening
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and just gathering all this wonderful information that my voice matters.
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I matter. And that even if
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Nobody else reads them, guess what?
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I don't care anymore. And people are reading them.
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And that feels awesome. My next one,
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I need to figure out how to schedule them on LinkedIn.
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That's what I need to I need to figure out how to schedule them on LinkedIn,
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which is one of my goals for this week.
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So
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Okay.
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I love that. And and I know that you said if nobody reads them,
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you know, you don't care anymore.
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What I'm hearing though is that you actually do care.
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And
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I do.
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what I also hear, Savannah, at listening to you,
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is that by not waiting
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And by sharing your story, by putting yourself out there for being vulnerable,
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sharing like your like you exactly what you said,
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your experiences, your coaching,
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your life, although
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Mm-hmm.
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somebody may not have the exact circumstances and you're not telling them step
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by step what to do,
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Right.
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they may be able to gather, like,
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~ gosh, I could that's something I could try or I can relate to that.
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And then also what I'm hearing talking about caring is you do care and
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you have this awareness that your newsletter is probably not going
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to be for everybody in the universe.
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Yeah.
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Right. Right.
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Absolutely. The one that made the most impact for me and I think finally broke
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the dam was after our last conversation and putting out my my newsletter
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And I finally figured out how to do it on to Facebook,
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was putting my my grief newsletter out on Facebook.
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And I I I had so many people reach out to me and say,
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Wow, that was that I'm sorry for your loss.
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You know, that was a very powerful story.
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Sounds like you're doing okay.
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I can come you know, I remember when this happened to me.
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So it became more of a community and a meeting of
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of
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the minds and a meeting of the hearts.
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I love that.
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Yes. And it it that that helped a lot because I mean shoot this year I mean
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in the last eight eight months I've lost four people.
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So that that one really that one really kind of broke it for me.
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That one that one opened up the gates.
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because I saw how much other people responded to it.
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And it that that really did say,
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Okay, you you can't you can't keep this to yourself anymore.
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You can't now is the time. Now is the time,
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now is the place.
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Yes. I love that.
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Dem.
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And so you talk about taking the first step.
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So that first step toward overcoming the fear of embarrassment or fear in general.
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Okay.
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tidbits that you can share about how to stop waiting for things such
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as cleaning out the closet or planting the garden.
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Although I think season may matter.
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I don't know exactly.
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Yeah
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yes. And with it, you know, being as hot as the sun outside,
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mm, that's that's a little difficult too.
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I recently had a a moment like that.
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I needed to clean out the garage because we are getting some work done
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on the house and I'm looking at it and I'm like there's
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There is no way they're gonna be able to come in here and do any of the work.
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So I I thought to myself, okay,
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so this is step one of what I'm gonna do.
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Tomorrow I'm gonna get up, I'm gonna have my coffee,
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I'm going to have my breakfast,
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and then I'm gonna go out there and I'm gonna set a timer for ten minutes.
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And so I set I set my timer for ten minutes and I said I'm gonna and it
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was a big job. I'm gonna take just the front stuff and I'm gonna move it out of
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the way because I know the front stuff is stuff that we're gonna keep.
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Mm.
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And that that timer went off for 10 minutes and I thought,
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you know what? I'm not ready to stop.
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I've got my momentum going. I set the timer again for another 10 minutes.
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Okay, love that. So you got to choose like the standard,
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the minimum was gonna be ten minutes,
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Mm.
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and then you got to decide I'm gonna do an extra ten,
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and maybe time wouldn't have allowed,
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and so you would have stopped,
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but your
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Right.
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your goal was first step, ten minutes.
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10 minutes. I've because
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I w I have a goal of getting at least this side of the garage cleaned
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out to be able to move things if I need to.
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I was able to get another ten minutes done and I said,
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okay, I'm gonna I'm gonna sit down,
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I'm gonna get some water, I'm gonna cool off because it had it rained while
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I was doing this and it was ugh swimming outside.
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So I sat down, I cooled off, I had some water,
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I
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Just took a moment and then I said and when my timer went off again,
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I then got up and I said, Okay,
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so I'm setting it. This time I'm gonna go ahead and I'm gonna set
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it for fifteen minutes because ten minutes was too short,
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twenty minutes was maybe a little too long.
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So I set it for fifteen. And I got
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everything that I wanted to get done in that 15 minutes and the
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the feeling of accomplishment and the feeling of I did that was awesome.
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It was absolutely amazing. And so I I set the timer for another five minutes.
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I sat back down I had some more water and I just kind of watched the world
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go by and I looked at the other stuff and I thought okay this is what this
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is my plan. I want to move this I'm gonna do that.
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So I started planning
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planning it in my head so when the timer went off I didn't hesitate.
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I stood up and I I set the timer again.
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I got back to work and I got everything that I wanted to get done
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and cleaned out that day. And
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That's a thing.
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I found three things that I wanted to sell on Facebook.
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One of them has already sold. If the other two don't get sold they're going
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to to Goodwill. They're done. Done.
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Yeah. That's so
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good. And I love that. So you know we always hear take one day at a time.
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And so you were taking fifteen minutes at a time.
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I love that. That's that's a bite-sized piece.
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It is.
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And then
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the fifteen minutes, it was it sounds like you were playing a beat the clock like
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a game.
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It
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kind of felt that way because I was like,
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okay, I only have fifteen minutes.
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Even though it was a self imposed time clock.
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Sure.
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And that motivation to get it done because
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To get this to get it cleaned out,
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A, I can now walk through my garage and it makes bringing in groceries
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a whole lot easier. And B, this is something that had to be done
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for something that's gonna better our family.
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That's gonna s
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Yeah.
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in the long run, it's gonna save us hundreds of dollars,
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hundreds of thousands of dollars.
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So
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Now I've only gotten one side done,
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so this weekend the goal is to get the other side done in preparation to
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be to be ready to go for Monday when they come in when they come
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to install the batteries.
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Nice. minus a tropical storm or some weird weather situation or
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Absolutely.
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who knows what's happening out in the world.
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But no, that's great. That is so good.
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You know, it's so funny, Savannah,
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listening. Well, it's not funny.
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Not funny at all, actually. thinking about my own life,
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like for so long. Okay, so I might have a touch of OCD sometimes.
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Whatever.
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I think we all do. It's good.
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Okay, good. So, but for so long in my life,
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like honestly, I would know things that needed to be done.
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Let's go with laundry. Okay. Yes,
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it is like a dream to wash,
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dry, and fold without any hesitation.
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I hate
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Right.
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doing
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I don't really hate it, but I really don't like it very much.
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Yeah.
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And I mean, it has that cute little song that goes off when the washer's finished,
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and another cute song when the dryer's finished.
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And you know, I
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Mm-hmm.
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could be Johnny on the spot and get it done.
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And I don't always get
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Right.
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it done in the order at the song playing time.
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And for years, if I couldn't
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have time or if I didn't think that I had time to start,
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wash, dry, and fold, I wouldn't start at all.
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Mm. Yes.
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I'd put it off, put it off, put it off,
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put it off. Well good grief. Then I'd need like two whole days because that'd
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be so much
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Right.
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laundry. So
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Yes.
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what I've realized is it's okay.
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This sounds so ridiculous to say out loud.
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And it is okay
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If I don't get them out of the dryer instantly.
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It's okay if I get them out of the dryer and don't fold them or hang them
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up for several hours.
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Right.
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Like that's one of many examples in my own life where I would put
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We need.
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off doing the thing if I could not do it from start to finish all in one chunk.
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Mm-hmm.
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And I was getting in my own way.
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And so I had all these 15, 20 minute increments of time that were
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Right.
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literally nothing. And it wasn't even
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Okay.
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I know Winnie the Pooh says doing nothing is still doing something.
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And I agree with that. And if I think about productivity,
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like, well, I can't
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This was my thinking, and I really don't like the words I can't,
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so I've changed that. But back then it was,
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Okay.
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~
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I can't I can't sit down to do the puzzle until I do the laundry,
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but I don't have time to start the laundry because I can't start it,
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wash, dry, fold, and put it away.
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And so
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Right.
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all that that thinking was a
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Wait.
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waste really of 15 minutes. And so
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Once I took this like a time audit,
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an audit of my time and where did I where could I buy time back,
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it was really
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Mm-hmm.
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and truly coming to this understanding and this realization,
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it doesn't have to be perfect,
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like you said before. And I can do whatever I can within that time period.
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And if it doesn't get finished,
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it will be there when I come back.
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Absolutely.
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Yes.
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It has
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freed up like a whole day within the day.
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Literally.
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Yes.
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Yes. Because y you get analysis paralysis.
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You know,
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Yeah.
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we just love that. The analysis paralysis.
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And I think we all suffer from it at some point or another with something,
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whether it's homework or you know,
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charting or preparing
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Yes.
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for something or cleaning something.
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We all have it. And
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It not only that, what I have found is that that analysis paralysis also brings
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on shame.
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Mm.
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And I I am not gonna live any more of my life surrounded by any kind of shame
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or put any kind of personalized shame because I waited or didn't do something that
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I wanted to do. Now is t nobody's guaranteed a tomorrow.
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Right.
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Now is the time to do it. And if,
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like you said, if it doesn't all get done,
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it will still be there. It will still be there.
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Yes, it will.
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Yes. As a matter of fact,
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I have laundry that still needs to be finished from yesterday.
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So it is still there. ~ And I
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Yeah. So good.
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don't I don't f I don't feel that that heaviness anymore.
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Mm.
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Because
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I'm I'm I'm gonna do the thing.
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I'm going to send out the the the newsletter.
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I'm going I'm going to do the the cleanup in the garage.
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I I'm going to do this. And that that heaviness feel or that heavy feeling
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of shame is not there anymore.
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Yeah, I love that. Have you also found this is something that I have found when
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I didn't think I had time to do the whole thing at once.
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Mm-hmm.
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And then I put that aside, like,
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okay, so you don't get it all done at once,
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do what you can. Like you were talking about the timer.
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If I've got fifteen minutes
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Nice meeting.
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till I've got to leave, that beat the clock.
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What I found is I finish it.
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Mm-hmm. Yes.
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within the time. So really I don't have a lot
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of leftover. I think it's fascinating how our brain works in that way.
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~ yes.
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I really do.
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Yes. And I remember you saying,
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I can't remember, it was recently,
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I remember you say talking about how our brain is what we tell it,
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or our our thoughts,
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Okay.
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you know, and if you tell yourself I can't,
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then yeah, you certainly can't.
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I can, I get
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That's right.
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to, I am able to, I'm able to start this and finish it.
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Yes.
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Maybe
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not finishing it. You're not putting a time limit on when you're finishing it.
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You just said finish it.
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Right.
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So that could be, you know, writing a book or writing,
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you know, a planner or writing your notes or writing a newsletter.
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You know, sometimes life just life gets in the way.
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And it's okay. It's okay.
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Yes,
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it is okay. So bottom line, stop waiting
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to feel
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Yeah.
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ready. Stop waiting because you only have ten minutes.
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Ten minutes. Right.
17:54
Right. Stop waiting for life to begin and start.
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Start.
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Start.
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Yes. Because there's so much to live.
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There's so much to do. And we all have the same amount of time.
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Hopefully.
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We do. And a friend of
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a friend of ours has talked about,
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~ how many does she say we have a hundred and what does she say?
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eight.
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Hundred and sixty eight, isn't it?
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I think so.
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Something something close to that.
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Yeah, I think so.
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Yes. And when you take out all of the sleeping and the eating and
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the driving and you know the bathroom and you know everything that we you have
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Okay.
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to do, yes, we are all left with with the same amount.
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So what do you want to do with it?
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Do you wanna live
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Yeah.
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and and experience or do you wanna sit and wait?
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And not not experience anything.
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I think I wanna live.
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Me too. Me too. It that's kind of how we went to Germany a couple of years ago.
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Because
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Mm-hmm.
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it was a you know, we r we wanna travel.
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And
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Yeah.
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something was said that, this is our favorite band's last touring thing.
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So we said, you know what? We're going.
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Now granted I was not going to the same thing that my husband went
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to and that's okay.
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Yeah,
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That is okay.
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But we did not hesitate. We did not say,
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Well, let's wait until we save up enough money.
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No. We started planning. And that was the most amazing trip I've ever been
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on in my entire life. I mean Yes.
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I love it. So y'all made the decision.
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Like you knew you wanted
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to go and you didn't say, Well,
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we'll have to wait 'cause we've got to do all this.
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You said, nope, we're going.
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Right.
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And we'll figure out how to make it happen.
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Like we are going to figure out how to make it happen.
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And y'all did. I love it.
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Absolutely. And we did. We did.
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And fourteen days of travel and places that I never thought
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I'd see and food that was amazing and company that was great.
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I think that's so good.
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Ugh, I've walked I think I I walked two inches off my legs,
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but I'm not really sure.
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Ha ha ha.
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And it was yes, there was no hesitation.
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There was no waiting until the time was right.
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It's kinda like when you have a baby.
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There's never a good time to have a baby.
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You just have a baby. And
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Right.
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so and they're loved and they're perfect in your eyes.
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And you don't wait. You it's the same thing for living.
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Don't wait. Don't wait to start the thing.
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until
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Yes.
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the time is right or until you are right or the situation is right or
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the weather is right.
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Take the one step.
20:33
Absolutely.
20:34
Don't think, just do. Like Magazine
20:36
Yeah.
20:37
says. So yes.
20:38
So good.
20:40
my gosh, Savannah. Well thank you for coming today and sharing with us.
20:43
~ thank you.
20:44
I agree. It's time to stop waiting to feel ready.
20:47
You're already ready. Make the step.
20:49
Mm-hmm. Absolutely.
20:51
So good.
20:53
Well, thank you so
20:54
much for having me. This was so much fun.
20:56
Yes,
20:56
thank you. And I can't wait to talk to you again soon.
20:59
And everyone,
21:00
Yes.
21:01
thank y'all for logging in and listening to Candid Coach Conversations.
21:05
Remember to live life fully and enjoy every moment.
21:08
We'll see you soon.