Latest / The Hauraki Big Show / THE DISCLAIMER: Dream On
Transcript
- 0:00Speaker 1: For all you mad bastards loving the Big Show Podcast.
- 0:05Speaker 2: Get up even closer on Instagram, YouTube.
- 0:08Speaker 1: And TikTok, or Raw Dog It.
- 0:11Speaker 3: Four to seven every weekday on Radio Hodak.
- 0:14Speaker 2: Oh, good day, fellas.
- 0:16Speaker 1: Back, bro.
- 0:16Speaker 2: Hello. Far out, eh?
- 0:19Speaker 4: Oh, yeah. It's a good start going into the long weekend.
- 0:22Speaker 1: It's beautiful.
- 0:23Speaker 4: Beautiful day, too, fellas, isn't it?
- 0:24Speaker 1: What a beautiful day, fellas.
- 0:25Speaker 2: Fuck, I keep forgetting it's a long weekend.
- 0:26Speaker 4: Yeah, I know.
- 0:27Speaker 1: How good?
- 0:28Speaker 4: Same, same, actually.
- 0:28Speaker 1: How many times have you remembered it?
- 0:30Speaker 2: Twice today Wow My wife was like We'll do that
- 0:33Speaker 2: on Monday And I was like Hang on a minute
- 0:35Speaker 2: Are you working And she was like Well no it's
- 0:36Speaker 2: a public holiday And then I said Holy fuck.
- 0:38Speaker 4: Yeah Yeah good It's a good holy fuck though Isn't
- 0:42Speaker 4: it Really good Yeah.
- 0:43Speaker 2: Especially when you're flat out Like I am Yes Bloody hell.
- 0:47Speaker 4: I was walking home last night. You know sometimes when
- 0:52Speaker 4: you're walking somewhere or you're off to some place and
- 0:56Speaker 4: you're thinking to yourself, I've forgotten something. Oh, yeah. I
- 1:00Speaker 4: feel like I've forgotten something. And I got all the
- 1:02Speaker 4: way home and it took me all the way to
- 1:05Speaker 4: walk home to realise I'm not wearing my headphones. I've
- 1:09Speaker 4: left them at the bloody office.
- 1:10Speaker 1: Oh, yeah.
- 1:11Speaker 4: Which is, you know, pretty darebrainish. Because I love my
- 1:15Speaker 4: candies and my tunes on the way home, and yet
- 1:18Speaker 4: I somehow didn't kind of put two and two together.
- 1:21Speaker 1: What a deer brain. Yeah.
- 1:22Speaker 2: So do you listen to tunes, do you?
- 1:24Speaker 4: Yeah, totally, man. Or Eckhart Tolle. Oh, yeah.
- 1:28Speaker 2: Yeah, right. Your umbrella's here as well.
- 1:31Speaker 4: Yeah, so is my shirt.
- 1:33Speaker 1: What shirt?
- 1:34Speaker 4: That red checkered one.
- 1:35Speaker 2: So are you just moving in here slowly?
- 1:37Speaker 4: Yeah, pretty much.
- 1:38Speaker 2: Because I saw you leave your toothbrush here.
- 1:39Speaker 1: How can you leave your red checkered shirt here?
- 1:41Speaker 4: Oh, I just can't be fucked taking it home.
- 1:44Speaker 2: It's really hard because Jase has a bag.
- 1:46Speaker 4: Yeah.
- 1:46Speaker 2: That he could easily put it in.
- 1:48Speaker 1: No, there's heaps in there, fellas.
- 1:49Speaker 5: Just Nicorette.
- 1:50Speaker 1: Nicorette.
- 1:51Speaker 4: I don't have any Nicorette in there.
- 1:52Speaker 2: And stolen blues sunglasses.
- 1:53Speaker 1: Do they do that anymore, the Nicorette?
- 1:54Speaker 4: Nah.
- 1:54Speaker 1: They don't do the gum?
- 1:56Speaker 4: Nah.
- 1:56Speaker 1: The patch is all gone?
- 1:57Speaker 4: Actually, I could probably go and get some gum.
- 1:59Speaker 1: Might do that.
- 2:01Speaker 4: Might do that tomorrow. I'm going fishing tomorrow. You excited
- 2:04Speaker 4: for me, fellas?
- 2:04Speaker 1: Where are you going?
- 2:06Speaker 4: Just down.
- 2:08Speaker 2: Oh, down there.
- 2:08Speaker 4: It's a place called Mechanics Bay. Just out of town here.
- 2:12Speaker 4: You're just going towards Mission Bay.
- 2:14Speaker 2: And what time will you be there just for the listeners?
- 2:16Speaker 4: I'm not going to tell you what time. About two
- 2:19Speaker 4: hours before high tide. That's generally when I go fishing.
- 2:22Speaker 1: Right, okay.
- 2:22Speaker 2: So if you want to go down and get a
- 2:23Speaker 2: selfie with Hoity J.
- 2:24Speaker 1: Get down there at high tide. Mechanics Bay. With that
- 2:27Speaker 1: in mind.
- 2:27Speaker 2: Can you take down some backbone shirts and stuff?
- 2:29Speaker 4: I went out to my old hood today, West Auckland.
- 2:33Speaker 4: It's really funny whenever I go out there these days.
- 2:37Speaker 4: And it's been a long time since I've been out there.
- 2:40Speaker 4: I get quite emotional, Mogi.
- 2:42Speaker 3: Right.
- 2:43Speaker 4: You know, and I drove past me old house there. Oh, yeah.
- 2:47Speaker 1: And it's like, oh.
- 2:48Speaker 2: You spent a lot of time there, Jase.
- 2:49Speaker 4: Yeah, more 26 years.
- 2:50Speaker 2: That's fucking ages.
- 2:52Speaker 4: That's a long time. And I get strangely emotional, whereas
- 2:56Speaker 4: my wife's like, jeez, that's in the distance.
- 2:59Speaker 3: Does it give her the act that you're crying? You know,
- 3:02Speaker 3: driving along crying. I guess you're in the passenger seat
- 3:04Speaker 3: or in the back or something.
- 3:05Speaker 4: She wasn't with me on this particular occasion. But yes,
- 3:08Speaker 4: it does give her the yuck if I cry.
- 3:10Speaker 2: She hated being out there with you, though. You know
- 3:12Speaker 2: what I mean? Whereas you didn't realise.
- 3:14Speaker 4: Yeah, I didn't realise. And that's, you know, where the
- 3:16Speaker 4: emotion comes from.
- 3:17Speaker 2: Yeah.
- 3:17Speaker 4: Just how much she hated me when we were out there.
- 3:20Speaker 2: Well, it's funny because I'm going to be like that
- 3:22Speaker 2: with my house. And I've only been there like eight years.
- 3:24Speaker 2: I'm very sad to leave it.
- 3:25Speaker 3: Are you?
- 3:25Speaker 2: Yeah, it's my first house, man. It's cute. My wife
- 3:28Speaker 2: said as well.
- 3:29Speaker 4: It struck me the day that we moved out, about
- 3:32Speaker 4: an hour before I officially kind of left, I just went, ooh, ooh, ooh,
- 3:39Speaker 4: I feel a bit teary-eyed. Had to go outside and
- 3:43Speaker 4: either suck on my vapour medallion. I can't remember what
- 3:46Speaker 4: I was doing at the time. One of the two.
- 3:47Speaker 2: Yeah. You ever felt like that, Mogi?
- 3:50Speaker 4: No.
- 3:51Speaker 2: He's hard, man.
- 3:51Speaker 3: Well, I just don't have any emotion. Because I move
- 3:53Speaker 3: so much, I don't have any emotional attachments.
- 3:56Speaker 2: Do you reckon you're like.
- 3:57Speaker 1: I had it kind of where I had a beach house.
- 4:00Speaker 5: Yeah.
- 4:00Speaker 3: It was sad to see the back of that because
- 4:02Speaker 3: that was very good for my mental health, that place.
- 4:04Speaker 4: What about Waiheke? Because that was a beautiful spot.
- 4:08Speaker 3: Yeah.
- 4:09Speaker 1: Yeah, I was pretty sad to leave that.
- 4:10Speaker 4: That was beautiful.
- 4:11Speaker 1: But certainly not to the point that I can remember it. Yes.
- 4:14Speaker 2: Yeah.
- 4:14Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah.
- 4:16Speaker 1: Raising three kids, all that sort of thing.
- 4:18Speaker 5: Yes.
- 4:18Speaker 2: Your ancestors were like travelling folks.
- 4:22Speaker 1: Backbones, weapons.
- 4:23Speaker 2: You know, like the kind of folks who would pack
- 4:25Speaker 2: it all up into the old pilgrim wagon there.
- 4:27Speaker 1: I don't think so. I think it's easily learned.
- 4:30Speaker 2: Yeah, right.
- 4:31Speaker 1: You know?
- 4:31Speaker 3: I think once you get into film and then you
- 4:33Speaker 3: start doing films and the films are all over the place,
- 4:36Speaker 3: you just become a– it's just that's the nature of
- 4:38Speaker 3: the job.
- 4:39Speaker 2: Yeah.
- 4:39Speaker 3: And then even my first job out of school was
- 4:41Speaker 3: a travelling salesman. Poor person, but in my case, man.
- 4:45Speaker 2: It was a man.
- 4:46Speaker 1: Definitely a man.
- 4:47Speaker 2: Who had a wet dream in the passenger seat while
- 4:49Speaker 2: his co-worker was driving. Do you remember that story?
- 4:52Speaker 1: It's one of the greats. Yeah, it was one of
- 4:54Speaker 1: the greats. And you were fuming because he woke you up.
- 4:56Speaker 1: I actually forgot about that. No, not at all. I
- 4:58Speaker 1: wasn't fuming. I was edging, actually.
- 5:02Speaker 4: Ah, okay.
- 5:02Speaker 3: I thought to myself, oh, that was close. And I
- 5:04Speaker 3: had a little look through my sleepy eyes there. I thought, oh,
- 5:06Speaker 3: we're quite close to our house. Trouble is, if I
- 5:09Speaker 3: go back to sleep, I'm probably going to finish off
- 5:11Speaker 3: this wet dream, and you don't want to do that in.
- 5:12Speaker 1: A car full of men. Anyway, off to sleep.
- 5:15Speaker 4: Anyway, yeah. The Hauraki Big Show, weekdays from 4 on
- 5:21Speaker 4: Radio Hauraki.
- 5:23Speaker 5: Oh, g'day, Matt.
- 5:24Speaker 1: Oh, hi, mate, yeah.
- 5:26Speaker 5: Look, if you want the chance to win all our
- 5:28Speaker 5: on-air competitions and stuff and get amongst the live conversation,
- 5:34Speaker 5: tune in to the Hauraki Big Show, four to seven
- 5:37Speaker 5: weekdays on Radio Hauraki and iHeartRadio.
- 5:42Speaker 2: The Hauraki Big Show podcast. What I was going to
- 5:45Speaker 2: say was, like, do you reckon that's why.
- 5:46Speaker 1: You have an amazing amount of jizz to have in
- 5:49Speaker 1: your body. When's the last time that happened to you, Jase?
- 5:53Speaker 1: I'll be honest.
- 5:53Speaker 4: I'm serious, Moby.
- 5:54Speaker 2: I'll ask my question after this jizz chat.
- 5:58Speaker 4: I don't think I've ever had a wet dream. Oh, really? Yeah.
- 6:01Speaker 5: True.
- 6:02Speaker 4: I mean, if I did, great. But I can't ever
- 6:06Speaker 4: recall waking up having jizzed on myself.
- 6:09Speaker 1: Really? In your sleep or anything? In my sleep, no.
- 6:11Speaker 4: Wow.
- 6:12Speaker 2: I'll never forget.
- 6:13Speaker 1: What a loser.
- 6:14Speaker 4: I reckon.
- 6:15Speaker 2: I was an intermediate.
- 6:17Speaker 5: Yeah.
- 6:18Speaker 2: And we were having sex. We were doing sex education.
- 6:21Speaker 2: And it was like, does anyone have any questions?
- 6:23Speaker 1: You were taking the class, though.
- 6:24Speaker 2: And the teachers, no, I won't say the name. Well,
- 6:28Speaker 2: the student, though, was a fella called Shannon. This is intermediate,
- 6:31Speaker 2: so like 11, 10 years old. I don't know. And
- 6:33Speaker 2: there were any questions. And then there was this, oh,
- 6:35Speaker 2: I've got a question about wet dreams.
- 6:37Speaker 1: He's like, oh, yeah.
- 6:37Speaker 2: So he's like, how much? You know, when it comes
- 6:40Speaker 2: to a wet dream, how wet is it? Like, you know,
- 6:43Speaker 2: asking a question like he had one. And the teacher was, oh,
- 6:47Speaker 2: you know, like maybe a tablespoon or blah, blah, blah.
- 6:49Speaker 2: And Shannon's like, what about like, oh, okay, because I
- 6:52Speaker 2: think I had one that was like a bucket. And
- 6:54Speaker 2: then I still remember the teacher being like, I think
- 6:56Speaker 2: you pissed the bed. And like we all laughed, but
- 7:01Speaker 2: he was like, that's not a wet dream, you know,
- 7:02Speaker 2: because the guy didn't know. He thought a wet dream
- 7:04Speaker 2: was you pissed the bed.
- 7:05Speaker 1: No, yeah, it was in the right place. Oh, I
- 7:08Speaker 1: thought he was being a funny bastard. He wasn't in
- 7:10Speaker 1: the right place for non-judgment.
- 7:13Speaker 2: No, exactly.
- 7:14Speaker 3: But to be fair, a lot of us at the time,
- 7:15Speaker 3: I mean, 10, 11, you don't know. No, you don't
- 7:17Speaker 3: know shit, but you pretend you do.
- 7:18Speaker 1: Oh, idiot.
- 7:19Speaker 2: Yeah, but I too was like, in my head I
- 7:22Speaker 2: was like, Oh, so a wet dream's different. But outwardly,
- 7:26Speaker 2: I was like, you fucking loser.
- 7:28Speaker 1: What a fucking loser.
- 7:28Speaker 4: Yeah. You're not my friend anymore, man. Shocking. Loser. I'm
- 7:31Speaker 4: going to go off now and pash a girl.
- 7:35Speaker 2: Get some heckies. Hook up with a girl.
- 7:36Speaker 1: Yeah, get a vacuum cleaner on my neck to make
- 7:39Speaker 1: some heckies.
- 7:40Speaker 4: Do you have wet dreams, Keezy?
- 7:42Speaker 2: No. So do you know what's funny? You know what's
- 7:47Speaker 2: funny is, actually, I'm going to finish my question first.
- 7:49Speaker 2: Do you reckon the fact that you move so much
- 7:51Speaker 2: is why you don't like clutter in the house? Subconsciously,
- 7:54Speaker 2: it's like, well, that's stuff I've got to pack up
- 7:56Speaker 2: and move. I bet Kate's also like that. She doesn't
- 7:58Speaker 2: move anywhere.
- 7:58Speaker 1: Yeah, right, okay.
- 7:59Speaker 3: Kate's like, as soon as she does the same thing
- 8:01Speaker 3: as I do, as soon as the family goes away,
- 8:03Speaker 3: which happened when you guys were away, she clears the
- 8:06Speaker 3: whole house out.
- 8:06Speaker 5: Yeah, nice.
- 8:07Speaker 4: Yeah, I don't like clutter either. No.
- 8:11Speaker 1: Generally, there'll be one of each in the house.
- 8:13Speaker 4: Yes.
- 8:15Speaker 1: Yeah, 100%. I'm the one that doesn't like it.
- 8:17Speaker 4: And you can imagine, and you'll probably be going through
- 8:20Speaker 4: this right now as we speak, 26, 27 fucking years
- 8:24Speaker 4: of clutter.
- 8:25Speaker 5: Yeah.
- 8:25Speaker 4: And four kids.
- 8:27Speaker 1: Yeah.
- 8:27Speaker 4: That's a lot of clutter there, man.
- 8:29Speaker 2: Yeah, I don't have the kids' clutter. Even without the kids' clutter,
- 8:31Speaker 2: it's like, what the fuck is all this?
- 8:32Speaker 5: Yes. Yeah.
- 8:34Speaker 2: But to answer your question, Jase, RE, the wet dream. Yeah.
- 8:37Speaker 2: Last night, I had a dream. And I woke up
- 8:40Speaker 2: this morning and I was raging. I know. Maybe I
- 8:43Speaker 2: can't remember, but I woke up and my wife was
- 8:46Speaker 2: getting ready for work and I was like, fuck, I
- 8:48Speaker 2: just had a dream about you. And she says, Oh yeah,
- 8:50Speaker 2: what are we doing? I was just like, it was
- 8:52Speaker 2: about to get real naughty. Like, you know, full nudity.
- 8:55Speaker 1: It was all on.
- 8:56Speaker 2: And then at the last minute she said to me
- 8:58Speaker 2: in the dream, do you want to do this? Or
- 9:00Speaker 2: should we, we should probably sort that thing out.
- 9:03Speaker 1: Finish off the boxing.
- 9:04Speaker 2: Something to do with the house or something. And then
- 9:07Speaker 2: I was like, Yeah, no, we should probably do that.
- 9:09Speaker 2: And then I woke up and I was just like, what?
- 9:11Speaker 2: What was that?
- 9:12Speaker 5: Yeah.
- 9:13Speaker 4: Yeah.
- 9:13Speaker 1: That's what you're choosing now.
- 9:15Speaker 2: Yeah. In my dream, I would rather do some house
- 9:18Speaker 2: admin than make sweet love.
- 9:21Speaker 4: I often have erotic dreams. And I'll go to tell
- 9:25Speaker 4: my wife and she's not the least bit interested.
- 9:27Speaker 5: Really?
- 9:27Speaker 1: I wouldn't have thought so. My wife's interested. She thinks
- 9:29Speaker 1: it's funny.
- 9:30Speaker 3: I had an absolute shocker last night, which is so
- 9:33Speaker 3: bad I can't even go into detail.
- 9:35Speaker 2: Who was it with?
- 9:36Speaker 4: Well, you know I've had some shockers.
- 9:38Speaker 2: You have.
- 9:39Speaker 1: You have.
- 9:40Speaker 2: Jase had one, which is just the ultimate shocker.
- 9:43Speaker 5: It is.
- 9:44Speaker 1: To this day. This isn't great either.
- 9:45Speaker 2: Who was it with, Meg? Can you say that?
- 9:47Speaker 1: No.
- 9:48Speaker 2: Female or male?
- 9:51Speaker 1: Barely a female.
- 9:55Speaker 2: What was Mogi up to?
- 9:58Speaker 1: Absolute shock. I'll tell you off here. Tell you off air.
- 10:01Speaker 1: Absolute disgrace.
- 10:05Speaker 4: I never have really kind of normal dreams.
- 10:08Speaker 1: What's a normal dream?
- 10:09Speaker 4: You know, just a sort of admin-y one or whatever.
- 10:12Speaker 4: They're always either erotic or horrific.
- 10:15Speaker 2: Either way, you wake up in a sweaty, tangled mess.
- 10:19Speaker 4: I don't do that anymore. I used to back in
- 10:21Speaker 4: the day when I was hitting the booze real hard,
- 10:23Speaker 4: but I don't pull the covers over quite as bad
- 10:27Speaker 4: as I used to.
- 10:28Speaker 2: Well, it's going to be a good sign, right?
- 10:29Speaker 4: Yeah, well, it's good. But yeah, I wonder what that
- 10:33Speaker 4: says about me. I'm kind of extreme in my dreams.
- 10:37Speaker 1: It's because you don't let it out in your real life.
- 10:39Speaker 4: Yeah, maybe.
- 10:39Speaker 3: In reality, you're an absolute crook bastard.
- 10:42Speaker 4: Yeah.
- 10:44Speaker 2: But also, I think I don't remember my admin dreams.
- 10:46Speaker 2: I only remember the vivid.
- 10:47Speaker 1: Crazy ones.
- 10:48Speaker 4: Yeah, you were telling us. Jeez.
- 10:50Speaker 2: So I'm saying that's probably why you think you only
- 10:52Speaker 2: have crazy dreams is because you don't remember.
- 10:54Speaker 1: Yeah, it's true.
- 10:55Speaker 2: Yeah, maybe.
- 10:57Speaker 4: What's the point of remembering the admin one?
- 11:00Speaker 2: I'd love a really lucid admin dream where I'm just
- 11:02Speaker 2: getting lots of admin done. Imagine that.
- 11:04Speaker 4: Yeah, man.
- 11:04Speaker 2: And you wake up and say, oh, that was good.
- 11:06Speaker 2: And you're like, oh, hang on, I actually haven't done
- 11:07Speaker 2: any of it.
- 11:08Speaker 1: Yeah, then you've got to do it.
- 11:09Speaker 2: Then you've actually got to do it.
- 11:10Speaker 1: Yeah, fuck.
- 11:11Speaker 2: Hey, anyway, have a long weekend.
- 11:12Speaker 1: Have a good long weekend. Have a long weekend. Have
- 11:14Speaker 1: a long weekend. Yeah, totally.
- 11:15Speaker 4: And don't come down. I want to be fishing in peace.
- 11:18Speaker 2: What is it, Mechanics Bay tomorrow morning? Listen to the
- 11:22Speaker 2: big show four to seven weekdays.
- 11:23Speaker 4: Bye.