Latest / Dear Chelsea / Minisode: Picking Fights with Chelsea + Catherine

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Minisode: Picking Fights with Chelsea + Catherine · Dear Chelsea

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Okay, guys, I am officially on my High and Mighty tour.
• 0:03
  Speaker 1: March thirteenth, Cleveland, Ohio. March fourteenth Columbus, Ohio. March fifteenth, Cincinnati, Ohio,
• 0:10
  Speaker 1: and then March twentieth is Denver, Colorado. March twenty seventh, Portland, Maine.
• 0:15
  Speaker 1: March twenty eighth, Providence, Rhode Island. March twenty ninth, Springfield, Massachusetts.
• 0:21
  Speaker 1: April tenth is Chicago. I'll be at the Chicago Theater.
• 0:25
  Speaker 1: April eleventh, Indianapolis, Indiana. April twelfth Louisville, Kentucky. April sixteenth
• 0:32
  Speaker 1: is Albuquerque, New Mexico. April seventeenth is Mesa, Arizona. April
• 0:36
  Speaker 1: twenty third is Kansas City, Missouri. April twenty fourth is
• 0:39
  Speaker 1: Saint Louis, Missouri. April twenty fifth is Minneapolis, Minnesota. April
• 0:44
  Speaker 1: thirtieth Nashville, Tennessee. May first is Charlotte, North Carolina. May
• 0:48
  Speaker 1: second is Durham, North Carolina. May sixth, I'm doing Netflix
• 0:52
  Speaker 1: as a joke festival. I will be in Los Angeles.
• 0:55
  Speaker 1: That is a new announcement, along with Atlantic City. May fifteenth, Toga, California.
• 1:01
  Speaker 1: May sixteenth, Monterey, California, May seventeenth Modesto, California, and then
• 1:06
  Speaker 1: June fourth, Portchester, New York. June fifth is Boston, mass
• 1:10
  Speaker 1: And June twelfth is Portland, Oregon.
• 1:13
  Speaker 2: And then Seattle is June thirteenth. So suck on that. Everybody.
• 1:18
  Speaker 2: Go to Chelseahandler dot com for tickets.
• 1:21
  Speaker 3: Hi Catherine, Hi Chelsea. I have to tell you I
• 1:26
  Speaker 3: was channeling you this morning when I almost got in
• 1:28
  Speaker 3: a fight with a man.
• 1:29
  Speaker 2: Oh wonderful.
• 1:31
  Speaker 3: I went to the gym, wonderful for you, I know, truly, truly.
• 1:36
  Speaker 3: My blood pressure was up.
• 1:37
  Speaker 4: So I went to the gym this morning and like
• 1:40
  Speaker 4: got Princess parking. I was feeling great about it, but
• 1:42
  Speaker 4: I had to sort of like wedge my car into
• 1:45
  Speaker 4: a space next to this guy and like just a
• 1:47
  Speaker 4: shitty truck with the big wheels and the you know,
• 1:50
  Speaker 4: it's all jacked up and whatever, the small penis truck.
• 1:53
  Speaker 4: And I heard the car start and the truck next
• 1:57
  Speaker 4: to me start, and I was like, okay, well, like
• 1:59
  Speaker 4: I'll just wait till he leaves so I can readjust
• 2:01
  Speaker 4: my car, make sure I'm not parked like an asshole. Right,
• 2:04
  Speaker 4: So I'm waiting and waiting and I turned off my car.
• 2:08
  Speaker 4: I see him walk up and through my rearview mirror,
• 2:10
  Speaker 4: I can see he's like bending down next to my car.
• 2:12
  Speaker 3: I'm like, what is this guy doing? It looked like
• 2:14
  Speaker 3: he was like taking a picture next to my car.
• 2:17
  Speaker 5: So he gets in his car.
• 2:18
  Speaker 4: I tried, I'd like turn my car on to roll
• 2:20
  Speaker 4: down the window and be like, hey, what the fuck dude,
• 2:23
  Speaker 4: And he doesn't hear me.
• 2:24
  Speaker 3: He's in his car.
• 2:25
  Speaker 4: So I get out a wrap on his window and
• 2:26
  Speaker 4: I'm like, hey, why are you like taking pictures of
• 2:28
  Speaker 4: my car? Like what's the deal. He's like, Oh, I
• 2:31
  Speaker 4: wasn't taking pictures of your car. I was taking pictures
• 2:34
  Speaker 4: of that. And I look down and like, my gym
• 2:36
  Speaker 4: is right next to a laundromat and there's like, you
• 2:38
  Speaker 4: know those inserts in a bikini that's just like the
• 2:41
  Speaker 4: foam padding. He was like taking a picture of that
• 2:44
  Speaker 4: that had fallen out of somebody's laundry. And I was like, okay, whatever,
• 2:48
  Speaker 4: Like men are so stupid. I'm like, that hasn't even
• 2:50
  Speaker 4: touched a boob, which I'm sure is also true of
• 2:53
  Speaker 4: him because he has that kind of a truck.
• 2:55
  Speaker 3: Anyway, So I go into the.
• 2:56
  Speaker 4: Gym, I work out all my like you know, anger issues.
• 3:01
  Speaker 4: I come back out, I try to get in my car.
• 3:04
  Speaker 4: I like opened the door to a black as suv.
• 3:07
  Speaker 4: It's not my car. I'm like, man, this person's a mess.
• 3:09
  Speaker 4: They left their car unlocked. So then I go find
• 3:13
  Speaker 4: my car. Realized not only had I left my car unlocked,
• 3:16
  Speaker 4: but my window was down from when I tried to
• 3:18
  Speaker 4: yell at this man and it was also on.
• 3:20
  Speaker 5: So just like, fully.
• 3:22
  Speaker 3: Left my car on in the.
• 3:25
  Speaker 2: Line open.
• 3:27
  Speaker 5: So anyway, I'm the car.
• 3:30
  Speaker 3: Yeah, no, well the key wasn't in the car.
• 3:32
  Speaker 2: I had the key with me.
• 3:33
  Speaker 5: It just like.
• 3:36
  Speaker 4: I'm like, girl, I'm a mess. I'm a mess. Yeah, anyway,
• 3:41
  Speaker 4: I tried to channel you and get in a fight.
• 3:43
  Speaker 2: So did you believe that he was taking a picture.
• 3:45
  Speaker 4: Of that or is that Yeah, he was like down
• 3:47
  Speaker 4: next to my car and he was like it looked
• 3:49
  Speaker 4: like he was taking a picture of my like tires
• 3:50
  Speaker 4: or something. Well, I'm like, he's parked like an asshole
• 3:53
  Speaker 4: and over the line, So I assumed he would be
• 3:55
  Speaker 4: an asshole.
• 3:55
  Speaker 1: But that reminds me of the time I took a
• 3:57
  Speaker 1: picture of a guy sitting down next to me on
• 3:59
  Speaker 1: the plane and he was so massive and his pants
• 4:02
  Speaker 1: were underneath like halfway down his butt crack, and he
• 4:06
  Speaker 1: leaned over and I took a picture of his butt crack,
• 4:09
  Speaker 1: and he caught me and he just like, did you
• 4:11
  Speaker 1: just take a picture of me?
• 4:12
  Speaker 2: And I'm like, yeah, I didn't know what.
• 4:16
  Speaker 1: I was like, I can't lie and my phone is
• 4:18
  Speaker 1: right here, and he goes why and I'm like, cause,
• 4:21
  Speaker 1: your butt crack is out and I wanted to send
• 4:23
  Speaker 1: it to my friend. And the rest of the fucking
• 4:26
  Speaker 1: flight we just had to sit next to each other
• 4:28
  Speaker 1: after I was the this is the beginning of the fight.
• 4:31
  Speaker 2: I'm trying. I had to I got caught.
• 4:33
  Speaker 1: I had to got caught red handed, and I had
• 4:35
  Speaker 1: to admit it and then fly with him for two hours.
• 4:39
  Speaker 3: I love that you just told the truth, you were like,
• 4:42
  Speaker 3: because it was too It.
• 4:43
  Speaker 1: Was like, I just went through all the scenarios in
• 4:45
  Speaker 1: my head. I'm like, he's gonna ask me to show
• 4:46
  Speaker 1: him my phone, and obviously I don't have to do that,
• 4:49
  Speaker 1: but then I'm a liar, so I'm like, just tell
• 4:51
  Speaker 1: me true. I know it was I was, but that yeah,
• 4:54
  Speaker 1: that was I was the asshole, but he was also
• 4:56
  Speaker 1: his asshole was almost out, so he was really the
• 4:59
  Speaker 1: og asshole.
• 5:05
  Speaker 4: Well, I have a quick update from Jessica, who called
• 5:08
  Speaker 4: in on our Laura and Jackson episode. She was parenting
• 5:12
  Speaker 4: through the loss of her own mom and so she
• 5:16
  Speaker 4: sent me a picture. When we talked to Laurel and Jackson.
• 5:19
  Speaker 4: Laura had told her look out for a blue butterfly
• 5:24
  Speaker 4: and a chicken. She's like, it's gonna come soon. Keep
• 5:27
  Speaker 4: an eye out for your blue butterfly and the chicken.
• 5:29
  Speaker 4: So Jessica texted me that very night with a picture
• 5:35
  Speaker 4: of like a planter in a corner hanging with a
• 5:38
  Speaker 4: blue butterfly sticking out. She goes, I have chills. She goes,
• 5:42
  Speaker 4: I didn't expect it so soon. I noticed it in
• 5:45
  Speaker 4: my dad's house today when taking a chance to talk
• 5:47
  Speaker 4: about my call with Laurel and Jackson with my stepmother.
• 5:50
  Speaker 4: I had never seen it before, and when I asked
• 5:52
  Speaker 4: my stepmother, she said, oh, I just moved it there.
• 5:55
  Speaker 4: It feels like my mom forgave her too and wants
• 5:57
  Speaker 4: me to make things work with her. Jessica, So it
• 6:00
  Speaker 4: was like that night after she talked to Laura, she
• 6:04
  Speaker 4: saw this sign from her Marlin Jackson.
• 6:06
  Speaker 5: This I did.
• 6:07
  Speaker 3: I did.
• 6:07
  Speaker 2: Ok, yeah, oh that's sweet.
• 6:10
  Speaker 3: Yeah. So we'll see if she gets back about the chicken.
• 6:12
  Speaker 4: I asked if she's seen the chicken yet, So maybe not,
• 6:14
  Speaker 4: but we'll wait and just.
• 6:16
  Speaker 2: Order a chicken at dinner and then there it is.
• 6:18
  Speaker 3: Maybe yeah, maybe it's that kind of chicken. Okay, cool.
• 6:22
  Speaker 4: Well. Our caller today is Melissa. Her subject line is microdosing,
• 6:27
  Speaker 4: shrooms and lesbian marriage rock bottom, Dear Chelsea.
• 6:32
  Speaker 3: Was my subject line? Catchy enough?
• 6:34
  Speaker 4: What a combo right shroom question is? For myself? I'm
• 6:38
  Speaker 4: the birth mom of our three young kids, currently on
• 6:41
  Speaker 4: you know.
• 6:41
  Speaker 3: Actually, she sent me an update.
• 6:43
  Speaker 4: She was on zoloft and now she's on lexapro and
• 6:46
  Speaker 4: it's going pretty well. The lesbian marriage advice is for
• 6:50
  Speaker 4: myself and my wife, who've been married for seven years
• 6:52
  Speaker 4: and together for twelve. My wife is going on forty
• 6:55
  Speaker 4: and she's not thrilled to say the least. Definitely a
• 6:58
  Speaker 4: midlife crisis type of situation. I'm currently typing this as
• 7:01
  Speaker 4: I feed our toddler twins on their bedroom floor while
• 7:03
  Speaker 4: breastpumping some fresh milk and eating animal crackers. Anyway, I'm
• 7:08
  Speaker 4: on lexapro now, but I want to try microdosing to
• 7:11
  Speaker 4: help with my anxiety, obsessive thinking and ADHD undiagnosed officially,
• 7:15
  Speaker 4: but I can guarantee I have it.
• 7:17
  Speaker 3: Is this a good idea?
• 7:19
  Speaker 2: Now?
• 7:19
  Speaker 4: I'll try to summarize the deep hole my wife and
• 7:21
  Speaker 4: I are in. We've been cycling through the same issues
• 7:24
  Speaker 4: throughout most of our relationship.
• 7:26
  Speaker 5: Problem one.
• 7:27
  Speaker 4: We deal with conflict very differently. She's yeller and quick
• 7:30
  Speaker 4: to anger, and I am the shutdown type that likes
• 7:33
  Speaker 4: to let everything fester inside and get passive aggressive when
• 7:35
  Speaker 4: it's too much. I always feel like I have to
• 7:37
  Speaker 4: defend myself. Problem too. We live in chaos most of
• 7:41
  Speaker 4: the time as we raise our three small kids. We
• 7:44
  Speaker 4: have no time to ourself. Problem three. She wants physical intimacy,
• 7:48
  Speaker 4: and I feel like my energy is so depleted that
• 7:50
  Speaker 4: the thought of sex most of the time makes me
• 7:52
  Speaker 4: feel like it's another chore I have to fit in.
• 7:54
  Speaker 4: How do we get through this phase and make it
• 7:56
  Speaker 4: to the other side intact?
• 7:58
  Speaker 3: Thanks for reading my middle of the night email? Love Melissa.
• 8:02
  Speaker 2: Hi Melissa, Hi, Hi, Hi. How old are your kids?
• 8:07
  Speaker 6: I have a four year old son, and then my
• 8:10
  Speaker 6: twins are actually twenty months old today, so okay.
• 8:13
  Speaker 1: Well, nobody's having a good time during that okay, sexually
• 8:17
  Speaker 1: or with their partners. Nobody's peaking in their relationships during
• 8:21
  Speaker 1: that time. So this is a moment in time. It
• 8:24
  Speaker 1: will not be permanent. Are you and your wife and
• 8:26
  Speaker 1: counseling at all? Do you have a therapist? A couple therapists?
• 8:29
  Speaker 6: We tried like four sessions and our therapists was a disaster,
• 8:33
  Speaker 6: so we didn't do we have no like, we have
• 8:36
  Speaker 6: no time, we have no time. We were doing sessions
• 8:39
  Speaker 6: at like eight thirty nine o'clock at night, rushing the
• 8:42
  Speaker 6: kids to bed, and then we were sitting down for therapy,
• 8:45
  Speaker 6: which didn't end up working out. Try reaching out like
• 8:48
  Speaker 6: a couple therapists, but like when do we have time?
• 8:51
  Speaker 2: Well, I mean if you.
• 8:51
  Speaker 1: Could squeeze it in at nine o'clock at night, Like
• 8:54
  Speaker 1: this is the time in your life where therapy is
• 8:55
  Speaker 1: really important. Yeah, you have Like, especially when you have
• 8:58
  Speaker 1: totally different temperaments, it's really important to understand how the
• 9:02
  Speaker 1: other person is operating and the pressure and stress that
• 9:04
  Speaker 1: the other person is under, Like you're dealing with a
• 9:07
  Speaker 1: lot on your plate. You know, she has a different temperament,
• 9:10
  Speaker 1: Like the communication is so important that I would really
• 9:13
  Speaker 1: like beseech you to try and find another therapist and
• 9:17
  Speaker 1: give it a whirl. I understand you have no time,
• 9:19
  Speaker 1: but a good therapist will bring you closer together and
• 9:23
  Speaker 1: like help you communicate better and more effectively quickly, Like
• 9:26
  Speaker 1: you will see changes quickly. So it sucks that you
• 9:29
  Speaker 1: found a bad one, but you're going to find a
• 9:31
  Speaker 1: good one.
• 9:31
  Speaker 2: I know that.
• 9:32
  Speaker 1: And like you need to make the time because it's
• 9:35
  Speaker 1: your relationship, and you know, like you're both wanting different things.
• 9:38
  Speaker 2: She's wanting more sex, you're not feeling it.
• 9:40
  Speaker 1: You're obviously you're breastfeeding, you have two little kids.
• 9:43
  Speaker 2: I mean, you look at it now, you're done with
• 9:45
  Speaker 2: the breastfeeding. Great, Great, You're just dealing with different.
• 9:48
  Speaker 1: Things and you're not you know, you're not aligned, But
• 9:51
  Speaker 1: that doesn't mean you're not going to become aligned. Like
• 9:53
  Speaker 1: it is, this is an impermanent thing, you know, so
• 9:56
  Speaker 1: you have to look at it like from a bigger
• 9:58
  Speaker 1: picture and kind of look at it from like the
• 10:00
  Speaker 1: thirty thousand view perspective, like, oh, that's when we went
• 10:03
  Speaker 1: through a really tough time.
• 10:05
  Speaker 2: But also you have to open the communication with.
• 10:07
  Speaker 1: Your partner about like how you guys can make improvements
• 10:11
  Speaker 1: even without a therapist, Like, how can we better understand
• 10:14
  Speaker 1: each other? I want us to be on the same page,
• 10:17
  Speaker 1: But I'm just not in that moment right now. I'm
• 10:19
  Speaker 1: feeling tired, I'm feeling depleted, and I know you're not
• 10:22
  Speaker 1: feeling that in the same sense as I am. So like,
• 10:25
  Speaker 1: let's figure out ways that we can more effectively communicate
• 10:29
  Speaker 1: and carve out time where it's just.
• 10:30
  Speaker 2: The two of you.
• 10:32
  Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, it's just the same.
• 10:33
  Speaker 6: It's we've had this for years, the same cycle, the
• 10:36
  Speaker 6: same conversation, the same.
• 10:38
  Speaker 2: And break it down. What is that conversation?
• 10:41
  Speaker 5: Will I'll be avoidant.
• 10:45
  Speaker 6: She wants to feel wanted, so then in turn she
• 10:49
  Speaker 6: wants to feel wanted. It turns into anger where I
• 10:52
  Speaker 6: like withdraw a little more and it's just our The
• 10:56
  Speaker 6: way we behave with each other and communicate is just
• 10:58
  Speaker 6: it just classes. So like right now, I said we
• 11:01
  Speaker 6: were rock bottom thirteen months ago for that email, we're
• 11:05
  Speaker 6: kind of like on the top of the rock now,
• 11:07
  Speaker 6: like a little platl. We're in a better spot. Not great,
• 11:10
  Speaker 6: we're kind of just and people are like, oh, you
• 11:13
  Speaker 6: have little kids. It'll get better, It'll get better. But
• 11:15
  Speaker 6: we want to be better now. We want we don't
• 11:17
  Speaker 6: want to be better three years from now. I'm like, oh,
• 11:19
  Speaker 6: let's just be okay where we are. And I know
• 11:22
  Speaker 6: my wife's not okay with that. I'm okay with that.
• 11:24
  Speaker 6: So we just need a change and we just don't
• 11:27
  Speaker 6: know how to get there right.
• 11:29
  Speaker 1: Well, that's why it's important to find a therapist because
• 11:32
  Speaker 1: you're not just going to change immediately without any help.
• 11:34
  Speaker 1: You have to change your patterns, and you need to
• 11:37
  Speaker 1: both read the book Attached, because that talks about all
• 11:40
  Speaker 1: what you're talking about. It talks about being an avoidant,
• 11:42
  Speaker 1: it talks about what your wife is. Once you see
• 11:45
  Speaker 1: it modeled for you, you're going to realize, oh, this
• 11:47
  Speaker 1: is a pattern. Everything you're saying is a pattern. But
• 11:50
  Speaker 1: that's going to be a great tool for you to
• 11:52
  Speaker 1: both of you read that book and it talks, you know,
• 11:54
  Speaker 1: about different emotional patterns and different emotional attachments. But also
• 11:59
  Speaker 1: you do want to get therapist because you don't just
• 12:01
  Speaker 1: heal things.
• 12:02
  Speaker 3: It takes time, so you especially habitual stuff.
• 12:05
  Speaker 5: Yeah, we're both kind of just waiting.
• 12:07
  Speaker 1: To write that's not realistic, Like you got to do
• 12:11
  Speaker 1: the work to get different results.
• 12:13
  Speaker 2: You have to do something different to get a different result.
• 12:16
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 12:17
  Speaker 4: I know in my marriage when I first did couples counseling,
• 12:20
  Speaker 4: there are tools that a good therapist can give you
• 12:24
  Speaker 4: to actually teach you how to have disagreements in a
• 12:26
  Speaker 4: healthy way. So it's not this pattern that you've been having,
• 12:29
  Speaker 4: and you can actually disrupt those patterns. It takes a
• 12:32
  Speaker 4: little while, it's not going to happen in two sessions.
• 12:34
  Speaker 4: But but yeah, I think Chelsea's right. I think this
• 12:37
  Speaker 4: is the time where, like you absolutely have to even
• 12:40
  Speaker 4: if it's nine o'clock at night, be seeing a therapy's.
• 12:42
  Speaker 5: Thirty yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 12:46
  Speaker 4: I did also want to touch on the sexuality thing.
• 12:48
  Speaker 4: I think being lesbians, you are in the perfect position
• 12:52
  Speaker 4: where if you're not feeling you want to be touched,
• 12:54
  Speaker 4: and your body is obviously being used for other things,
• 12:58
  Speaker 4: which is kids collecting all over, you make her come,
• 13:01
  Speaker 4: Like you don't have to have her touch you. You
• 13:03
  Speaker 4: can quickly make her come. She needs it for the
• 13:05
  Speaker 4: stress relief. You guys need it for the connection. And
• 13:08
  Speaker 4: then if you're feeling it great, keep going, but just
• 13:11
  Speaker 4: make her come and you're good.
• 13:12
  Speaker 6: I know, I know, it's just I don't know lie them.
• 13:14
  Speaker 6: You spend twenty minutes, twenty five minutes talking about how
• 13:16
  Speaker 6: I'm not in the mood when I could have just
• 13:18
  Speaker 6: been doing that.
• 13:18
  Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, just make her come to Like I'm not
• 13:21
  Speaker 4: in the mood for you to touch me tonight, but like,
• 13:23
  Speaker 4: let me make you come.
• 13:24
  Speaker 5: I mean usually at that point I'm like, mm, well, well.
• 13:28
  Speaker 1: Well, patterns, patterns need to be broken. Like you are
• 13:30
  Speaker 1: the one capable of breaking a pattern. So, for instance,
• 13:33
  Speaker 1: that's a pattern you arguing with twenty minutes or defending
• 13:35
  Speaker 1: yourself for twenty minutes about why you're not interested could
• 13:38
  Speaker 1: be resolved with you just doing something differently.
• 13:40
  Speaker 5: I know you're right, You're right, I know, I know.
• 13:42
  Speaker 5: I'm so sober.
• 13:44
  Speaker 1: So look at little things like that in your life
• 13:46
  Speaker 1: and look at the things in the same reactions you
• 13:48
  Speaker 1: have to things where maybe you don't feel seen or
• 13:51
  Speaker 1: maybe and even if you're not getting what you want,
• 13:54
  Speaker 1: change your reaction to it and see if that changes
• 13:57
  Speaker 1: the dynamic, because it will.
• 13:58
  Speaker 6: It's just the little things that I have to change.
• 14:01
  Speaker 6: It's so hard once you're in the habit for so
• 14:03
  Speaker 6: many years, it's hard to break that, I know.
• 14:06
  Speaker 2: Yeah, but habits can be broken. That's the good news.
• 14:08
  Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, Chelsea, do you want to address the microdosing
• 14:11
  Speaker 4: shrooms and if that might be helpful?
• 14:14
  Speaker 1: Well, yeah, I mean I think microdosing is great. If
• 14:16
  Speaker 1: you are you currently are you getting off of your remeds?
• 14:19
  Speaker 1: Did you say are you staying on them?
• 14:21
  Speaker 6: I just started lexapro a couple months ago. It is helping,
• 14:25
  Speaker 6: but I want to be more on the natural side.
• 14:27
  Speaker 6: But I just need something that I knew was going
• 14:29
  Speaker 6: to work this right.
• 14:30
  Speaker 1: What I would advise to you, what I think you
• 14:32
  Speaker 1: guys should do is microdose MDMA together because that's going
• 14:35
  Speaker 1: to bring you closer together and get rid of your egos.
• 14:37
  Speaker 1: And couples do MDMA therapy are like they have a
• 14:41
  Speaker 1: whole different perspective once they do that, because it's just
• 14:44
  Speaker 1: love and a heart opener, Like you are loving and
• 14:47
  Speaker 1: every good thing about them and yourself comes to the
• 14:50
  Speaker 1: surface and all the fighting kind of falls away and
• 14:52
  Speaker 1: you can be honest. So I think, like, but that
• 14:55
  Speaker 1: doesn't work when you're on antidepressants MDMA, Like the receptors
• 14:59
  Speaker 1: that you use for antidepressants or that are used for
• 15:01
  Speaker 1: antidepressants are the same receptors you would use for MDMA.
• 15:05
  Speaker 1: And I'm not positive if that applies to mushrooms. I
• 15:07
  Speaker 1: think mushrooms are pretty much a free for all.
• 15:09
  Speaker 2: So that can.
• 15:10
  Speaker 1: Help you with your ADHD, and that can help you
• 15:13
  Speaker 1: with other things. But for the purpose of you guys
• 15:16
  Speaker 1: coming together, I honestly think MDMA is the answer. But
• 15:19
  Speaker 1: it's not going to work when you're on an antidepressant, right.
• 15:22
  Speaker 6: Well.
• 15:23
  Speaker 1: I had this funny conversation with my therapist, my psychiatrist
• 15:27
  Speaker 1: a few months ago because I was going through this
• 15:29
  Speaker 1: shit with my house and I was so irritated and
• 15:32
  Speaker 1: so just spent, And he was like, why don't we
• 15:34
  Speaker 1: just throw you on an antidepressant for like until this
• 15:37
  Speaker 1: is done. You know you're also going your hormones or
• 15:40
  Speaker 1: your hormones, your hormones are all out of whack.
• 15:43
  Speaker 2: Why don't we put you on an antidepressant.
• 15:45
  Speaker 1: I was like, well, doesn't that conflict with MDMA my
• 15:47
  Speaker 1: receptors for MDMA, And he's like, how often are you
• 15:49
  Speaker 1: doing MDMA. I'm like, it's a pretty big part of
• 15:51
  Speaker 1: my lifestyle, Like I'd rather have the MDMA than the
• 15:55
  Speaker 1: fucking antidepressant for me, Like I need the shot of
• 15:58
  Speaker 1: MDMA every once in a while. So I could remember, Oh, yeah,
• 16:01
  Speaker 1: life is awesome. You know, things are great when you
• 16:03
  Speaker 1: focus on them. So yeah, micro dossing mushrooms seems to
• 16:06
  Speaker 1: be like a really great tool for a lot of people.
• 16:09
  Speaker 1: Definitely be open to things and be open to changing
• 16:11
  Speaker 1: patterns of behavior, and that includes trying to microdose and
• 16:15
  Speaker 1: trying to you know, tick her with your medication and
• 16:18
  Speaker 1: ticker with your patterns of behavior.
• 16:20
  Speaker 2: So I think psychedelics are a really.
• 16:22
  Speaker 1: Big tool in doing that and cutting off bad patterns
• 16:24
  Speaker 1: of behavior. So if your wife is open to it,
• 16:27
  Speaker 1: and you know, you get to a place, then you
• 16:29
  Speaker 1: should try and find some a therapist that helps with that,
• 16:32
  Speaker 1: that will work with you and do the MDMA. It's
• 16:35
  Speaker 1: not like you're partying.
• 16:36
  Speaker 2: It's like you're.
• 16:36
  Speaker 1: Going and actually working through your problems right with a
• 16:39
  Speaker 1: counselor Yeah.
• 16:41
  Speaker 6: Yeah, I think we will both benefit like individually too.
• 16:45
  Speaker 2: Yeah, but get that book first as a first step.
• 16:47
  Speaker 2: Get the book attached.
• 16:48
  Speaker 1: That will break down both of your habits and then
• 16:51
  Speaker 1: you once you identify who you are and the kind
• 16:54
  Speaker 1: of you know, if you're an avoidant or if you're
• 16:56
  Speaker 1: what are the other two in that book. I'm having
• 16:58
  Speaker 1: a hard time remembering if you're if you're like one
• 17:01
  Speaker 1: is like secure, Oh yeah, if you're a secure, anxious, anxious,
• 17:05
  Speaker 1: avoidant or the three Yeah, so yeah, the secure. Yeah,
• 17:09
  Speaker 1: your your wife sounds like anxious and and and secure,
• 17:12
  Speaker 1: because if she gets mad at you for not being wanted,
• 17:16
  Speaker 1: then that's anxious and then that's also right she probably Yeah,
• 17:20
  Speaker 1: So I don't know, but read that book and use
• 17:23
  Speaker 1: that as a tool, and then just really focus.
• 17:25
  Speaker 2: On finding a therapist.
• 17:26
  Speaker 1: Yes, all right, and don't worry about the time you
• 17:29
  Speaker 1: need the time I need to put it in the
• 17:30
  Speaker 1: time for your relationship to be successful.
• 17:33
  Speaker 3: Yeah, you're right, yeah, right, all right, thanks, Will you
• 17:36
  Speaker 3: follow up with us?
• 17:37
  Speaker 5: Yes? Yes, okay, right, okay, so much thanks you buy by.
• 17:47
  Speaker 4: Okay, we'll wrap up with a little quickie here. Dear
• 17:50
  Speaker 4: Chelsea who says I'm planning a fiftieth birthday trip with
• 17:53
  Speaker 4: a few girlfriends this summer in Majorca. I'm sure listening
• 17:57
  Speaker 4: to Chelsea lovingly talk about Mayorca has subconsciously influenced my pick.
• 18:01
  Speaker 4: I just started researching some options and had some questions,
• 18:04
  Speaker 4: so naturally I knew who to ask. My question is
• 18:07
  Speaker 4: which side of Mayorca do you recommend for a fun
• 18:09
  Speaker 4: girls trip. Is the Palma side really crowded and crazy
• 18:11
  Speaker 4: in the summer? Do you recommend the other side, like Alcudia.
• 18:15
  Speaker 4: We are also trying to see if we can be
• 18:16
  Speaker 4: there for the solar eclipse on August twelfth. Hope to
• 18:19
  Speaker 4: hear your Majorca RECs and hope to see another one
• 18:21
  Speaker 4: of your shows soon.
• 18:23
  Speaker 3: Thanks Sue.
• 18:24
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I would say Palm is really busy Alcudia that
• 18:27
  Speaker 1: would be a good idea for a girl's trip if
• 18:29
  Speaker 1: you want to just kind of not be too crazy,
• 18:31
  Speaker 1: but be crazy with each other, which is kind of
• 18:33
  Speaker 1: my chihana trip.
• 18:34
  Speaker 2: Like I like to be the party, not go to
• 18:37
  Speaker 2: a party.
• 18:38
  Speaker 1: So if you're into making the party, I would go
• 18:40
  Speaker 1: to Alcutia if you're going. If you're looking to be
• 18:43
  Speaker 1: in like a massive people and have lots of options,
• 18:46
  Speaker 1: then go to Palma. But there's other parts of the
• 18:48
  Speaker 1: island that are quiet. I mean the island's massive, so
• 18:50
  Speaker 1: there's lots of different places. There's Poalensa, there's Daya that's
• 18:54
  Speaker 1: a little bit more quiet and sleepy, but it's also
• 18:57
  Speaker 1: a great place to hang out with your girlfriends. So
• 19:01
  Speaker 1: it's again it's like, you know, what are you the
• 19:03
  Speaker 1: party or are you going to find the party?
• 19:06
  Speaker 5: Great?
• 19:06
  Speaker 1: Okay, well that's our minniesod for today. Thank you, thank you, hello,
• 19:11
  Speaker 1: goodbye bye. Okay, guys, I am officially on my high
• 19:15
  Speaker 1: and Mighty tour. March thirteenth, Cleveland, Ohio. March fourteenth, Columbus, Ohio.
• 19:21
  Speaker 1: March fifteenth, Cincinnati, Ohio. And then March twentieth is Denver, Colorado.
• 19:26
  Speaker 1: March twenty seventh Portland, Maine. March twenty eighth, Providence, Rhode Island.
• 19:31
  Speaker 1: March twenty ninth, Springfield, Massachusetts. April tenth is Chicago. I'll
• 19:36
  Speaker 1: be at the Chicago Theater. April eleventh Indianapolis, Indiana. April
• 19:41
  Speaker 1: twelfth Louisville, Kentucky. April sixteenth is Albuquerque, New Mexico. April
• 19:47
  Speaker 1: seventeenth is Mesa, Arizona. April twenty third is Kansas City, Missouri.
• 19:51
  Speaker 1: April twenty fourth is Saint Louis, Missouri. April twenty fifth
• 19:54
  Speaker 1: is Minneapolis, Minnesota. April thirtieth Nashville, Tennessee. May first is Charlotte,
• 20:01
  Speaker 1: North Carolina. May second is Durham, North Carolina. May sixth
• 20:04
  Speaker 1: I'm doing Netflix as a joke festival. I will be
• 20:07
  Speaker 1: in Los Angeles. That is a new announcement, along with
• 20:10
  Speaker 1: Atlantic City May fifteenth, Saratoga, California, May sixteenth, Monterey, California,
• 20:16
  Speaker 1: May seventeenth, Modesto, California, and then June.
• 20:19
  Speaker 2: Fourth Portchester, New York.
• 20:21
  Speaker 1: June fifth is Boston, mass and June twelfth is Portland, Oregon.
• 20:26
  Speaker 1: And then Seattle is June thirteenth. So suck on that, everybody.
• 20:31
  Speaker 1: Go to Chelseahandler dot com for tickets.
• 20:35
  Speaker 4: If you want advice from Chelsea, write into Dear Chelsea
• 20:37
  Speaker 4: podcast at gmail dot com.
• 20:40
  Speaker 3: Dear Chelsea is a production of iHeartMedia.
• 20:42
  Speaker 4: Follow Chelsea on all socials at Chelsea Handler and find
• 20:45
  Speaker 4: Catherine on TikTok at flash Cadabra.
• 20:48
  Speaker 3: Dear Chelsea is edited and engineered by Brandon.
• 20:51
  Speaker 4: Dickert executive producer Catherine Law. Find full video episodes and
• 20:55
  Speaker 4: minisodes now on Netflix, and get tickets to see Chelsea
• 20:58
  Speaker 4: live at Chelseahandler dot com