Latest / The Career Mentor Podcast with Fexingo: Finding Mentors, Sponsors, and Career Advisors / How to Turn a Mentor into a Sponsor
Transcript
- Lucas: So we talk a lot on this show about finding mentors, and we've given you a bunch of practical advice on how to ask someone to be your mentor, how to keep that relationship healthy, even how to end it gracefully. But there's a step beyond mentorship that doesn't get nearly enough attention, and it might actually matter more for your career trajectory. Luna: You're talking about sponsorship, right? The difference between someone who gives you advice and someone who actually puts their name on the line for you. Lucas: Exactly. And I want to anchor this in a specific story because it's one I keep coming back to. There's a woman named Carla Harris — she's a vice chairman at Morgan Stanley, and she's written and spoken a lot about sponsorship. She tells this story of a mid-career marketing manager at Procter & Gamble who wanted to become a VP. She had a mentor who gave her great feedback on her presentations, helped her think through her career moves, but she wasn't getting the promotion. Luna: Right, because advice alone doesn't get you the seat at the table. Someone has to actually advocate for you when you're not in the room. Lucas: That's exactly it. So she went back to her mentor and said, 'I appreciate all the guidance, but I need you to be my sponsor. I need you to speak my name in the meetings where I'm not present. I need you to put your political capital behind my promotion.' And the mentor — who was a senior leader — agreed. He went to bat for her, used his influence, and she got the VP role. The key takeaway from Carla Harris is this: a mentor gives you advice, but a sponsor gives you access, visibility, and their own reputation. Luna: And that's a much bigger ask. It's not just 'can you help me think through this?' It's 'will you risk your credibility for me?' That changes the dynamic completely. Lucas: It does. And most people never make that shift. They stay in the mentor relationship, which is valuable, but it's not the thing that gets you promoted. According to a study by the Center for Talent Innovation — now called Coqual — women and people of color are less likely to have sponsors than white men. And that sponsorship gap explains a significant portion of the leadership representation gap. So it's not just a nice to have; it's a structural career accelerator. Luna: So how do you actually make that leap? How do you turn a mentor into a sponsor without damaging the relationship? Lucas: There are really three specific actions you need to take. First, you have to demonstrate readiness. A sponsor won't put their name on the line for someone who isn't already performing at the next level. So before you even ask for sponsorship, you need to have a track record of delivering results that are visible and quantifiable. Second, you need to ask explicitly for advocacy. Not just 'can you give me feedback' but 'would you be willing to speak on my behalf when opportunities come up?' And third, you need to deliver. Once they sponsor you, you cannot let them down — because their reputation is now tied to yours. Luna: I think the second step is the one most people skip. They assume their mentor knows they want a promotion, that the mentor will naturally speak up. But you have to make it explicit. You have to say the words. Lucas: Exactly. And here's a framework I like from a book called 'The Sponsor Effect' by Sylvia Ann Hewlett. She says sponsors provide three things: visibility — they put you in front of senior leaders; access — they get you into meetings and projects that matter; and protection — they shield you from political fallout. When you ask someone to sponsor you, you're asking for all three. So you need to be specific about which one you need most. Luna: I remember when I was earlier in my career, I had a mentor who was a director in a different department. She was great for advice, but she didn't have a seat at the table where my promotion was decided. So I had to find a sponsor who was actually in that room. That's another key point, right? The person you ask has to have the power to make things happen. Lucas: That's a crucial distinction. Not every mentor can become a sponsor. A sponsor needs organizational power. They need to be senior enough that their endorsement carries weight. So when you're identifying potential sponsors, look for people who are at least two levels above you, who have a track record of promoting talent, and who have a reputation for being influential. And ideally, they should have some visibility into your work already. Luna: And you have to build trust over time. You can't walk up to a senior leader you barely know and ask them to sponsor you. That's a recipe for a no. Lucas: Right. The trust piece is built through consistent performance and through making their life easier. If you can solve a problem for them, or make them look good, they'll be much more inclined to invest in you. One tactic I've seen work is to ask for a small advocacy first — like 'would you be willing to introduce me to someone in your network?' Then after they do that and you follow through, you can ask for something bigger. It's a staircase. Luna: That's smart. It's like a test of the relationship. If they won't do the small thing, they definitely won't do the big thing. And if they do the small thing and you handle it well, they trust you more. Lucas: Exactly. And let me give you another concrete example. I know a woman who works at a large tech company. She wanted to move from product marketing into product management. She had a mentor in product marketing, but that person couldn't help her switch functions. So she identified a senior product director who had a reputation for developing talent. She started by offering to help with a project he was leading — she volunteered to do some market research. He saw her work ethic and her thinking. Then she asked if he'd be willing to advocate for her to get an interview for a product manager role. He did, she got the job, and he became her sponsor. He later told her that the reason he sponsored her was because she had proven herself before asking. Luna: So the pattern is: deliver first, ask second. That's the opposite of what a lot of people do. They ask for sponsorship hoping to prove themselves later. But sponsors want proof upfront. Lucas: That's exactly right. And I think the reason people avoid asking for sponsorship is fear. They're afraid of rejection, or they feel like it's presumptuous. But the research shows that when you ask for sponsorship, you're actually giving the senior person an opportunity to invest in someone they believe in. Most senior leaders want to develop talent; they just need to know who's ready and willing. So by asking, you're signaling ambition and self-awareness, which are attractive traits. Luna: I want to circle back to something you said earlier about the sponsorship gap. If women and people of color are less likely to have sponsors, then the onus is partly on organizations to create structures that facilitate sponsorship. But individually, what can people in those groups do to overcome that gap? Lucas: That's a great question. One thing is to be proactive about building relationships with senior leaders who are not like you. Often, people naturally gravitate toward mentors who share their background, but sponsors may need to come from different circles. So intentionally seek out leaders who have influence in parts of the organization you want to move into. Another thing is to make your aspirations known. A lot of people assume that if they do good work, someone will notice and promote them. But in most organizations, visibility is not automatic. You have to communicate your goals to the right people. Luna: And there's also the option of finding a sponsor who is also a member of an employee resource group or who has a stated commitment to diversity. Some companies have formal sponsorship programs for underrepresented groups. That can be a lower-barrier way to start. Lucas: Absolutely. And I should say, sponsorship doesn't have to be a lifetime commitment. It can be situational. You might have a sponsor for a specific promotion, or for a specific project. Once you get the role, that sponsorship relationship may naturally fade, and that's okay. The goal is to get the career win, not to collect sponsors. Luna: So if someone is listening and thinking, 'Okay, I have a mentor, but I need a sponsor,' what's the single most important action they should take this week? Lucas: Identify one person — just one — who has the power to influence your next career move. Then find a way to add value to them. That could be sharing an insight, volunteering for a project they care about, or simply asking for their perspective on a challenge you're working on. Once you've delivered value, then have the conversation where you explicitly ask for their advocacy. And be prepared to tell them exactly what you want and why you're ready. Luna: I like that. It's actionable. And it respects the fact that sponsorship is a relationship, not a transaction. But you still have to ask. Lucas: You do. And honestly, if this episode helped you think through your next career move, that's exactly the kind of value we hope to provide. If it was worth a coffee to you, you can support the show at buy me a coffee dot com slash fexingo. It's the smallest possible ask, and it directly helps us keep the podcast ad-free and focused on content like this. Luna: And we really appreciate that. It's listener support that keeps us going, and it means we can dive into topics like sponsorship without worrying about sponsors pulling the strings. Lucas: Exactly. So back to the practical side — once you have that conversation and your sponsor agrees to advocate for you, you need to make it easy for them. Provide them with a one-page summary of your accomplishments, your career goals, and the specific roles you're targeting. That way, when they're in a meeting and your name comes up, they have talking points ready. Luna: That's a pro tip. Because even if they believe in you, they might not remember all your achievements off the top of their head. Give them the ammunition. Lucas: And then, after they advocate for you and you get the role — or even if you don't — follow up and thank them. Acknowledge the effort they put in. That builds long-term goodwill and keeps the door open for future sponsorship. And if you get the role, deliver on your promises. Nothing kills a sponsor relationship faster than the person they stuck their neck out for not performing. Luna: So to sum up: sponsors are different from mentors, they require explicit ask, they need to see proof before they invest, and you have to make it easy for them to help you. Did I miss anything? Lucas: I think that covers the core. I'll add one more thing: don't wait until you need a sponsor to start building the relationships. Start now, when you don't need anything. Because the strongest sponsorship relationships are built on a foundation of genuine connection and mutual respect, not just a transactional ask in a moment of desperation. Luna: That's a good note to end on. Thanks for the insights, Lucas. And to our listeners, we hope you find the courage to ask for sponsorship — it could be the thing that changes your career. Lucas: Absolutely. Until next time.