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Vermont Fatherhood with founder Josh Miller · Aired Out

• 0:30
  Speaker 1: Sassi.
• 1:28
  Speaker 2: All right, Flying the Wall Productions bringing you the aired
• 1:31
  Speaker 2: Out podcast here on a Monday. It is going to
• 1:36
  Speaker 2: be a super super week here at Airedout. Cyrus Douchcharm
• 1:42
  Speaker 2: and Evan Barron from eight h two Meets and Cruises.
• 1:45
  Speaker 2: Ethos Racing Club is going to be on the air
• 1:48
  Speaker 2: with me Tomorrow Wednesday. Jim Barnes from the Dalgeville Elementary
• 1:57
  Speaker 2: School will be my guest Thursday. A local coach who's
• 2:02
  Speaker 2: love for youth softball shares a secret that I think
• 2:08
  Speaker 2: we're most of us anyway, are missing. Plus a look
• 2:11
  Speaker 2: at some new programs over at Washington County Mental Health
• 2:16
  Speaker 2: Services this week. Friday, your weekend kick off with a
• 2:21
  Speaker 2: heavy dose of mental floss as g tears the airwaves
• 2:28
  Speaker 2: to shred. It's gonna be fun. Don't worry. He's not
• 2:31
  Speaker 2: afraid to say what you're thinking. Congratulations to all of
• 2:37
  Speaker 2: the students who are graduating this weekend. Big milestones to
• 2:44
  Speaker 2: celebrate in things that we're going to be talking about
• 2:47
  Speaker 2: this week on the air. Weather fifty degrees or close
• 2:53
  Speaker 2: to it for most of us. This morning it was
• 2:56
  Speaker 2: forty six degrees at my house. Had to close the windows.
• 2:59
  Speaker 2: Some thick fog also in the valleys this morning, but
• 3:05
  Speaker 2: we're looking at sun clouds around seventy eight today, Gonna
• 3:08
  Speaker 2: be just perfect clear tonight, lower fifties, hot tomorrow eighty
• 3:13
  Speaker 2: five in partly cloudy skies. Maybe we should say partly
• 3:19
  Speaker 2: sunny on Tuesday. Tomorrow, and then rain moves in. Wednesday, Thursday,
• 3:24
  Speaker 2: Friday gonna be wet weather. The good news though, at
• 3:28
  Speaker 2: least it's gonna be a warm, wet eighties for Thursday,
• 3:33
  Speaker 2: for Wednesday, Thursday and Friday, which is nice. This weekend
• 3:36
  Speaker 2: at this point anyway, looks amazing. We're gonna get to
• 3:41
  Speaker 2: some birthdays. We have a lot to talk about this morning.
• 3:44
  Speaker 2: But Josh Miller from my fatherhood is sitting right next
• 3:48
  Speaker 2: to me. This is the second Monday of the month.
• 3:52
  Speaker 2: Good morning, my friend. How are you?
• 3:53
  Speaker 3: Good morning?
• 3:54
  Speaker 2: Pretty well, that's when you come on with me, you know,
• 3:56
  Speaker 2: I gotta start out by saying this morning a couple
• 4:01
  Speaker 2: of things. First of all, welcome, happy Monday, and welcome
• 4:06
  Speaker 2: to the work week. Bumped into a lady at a
• 4:10
  Speaker 2: country store recently, and she right away had never met
• 4:15
  Speaker 2: her before. Paid some really really nice compliments to you
• 4:20
  Speaker 2: and I for what we bring to the airwaves with
• 4:25
  Speaker 2: from out fatherhood and talking about being a dad, being
• 4:29
  Speaker 2: a father and what the difference is. So just a
• 4:34
  Speaker 2: big thank you to you for coming in here the
• 4:38
  Speaker 2: second Monday of every month, spending a short amount of
• 4:41
  Speaker 2: time but a powerful amount of time with us and connecting,
• 4:46
  Speaker 2: connecting all of us. And it's not just dads, you know.
• 4:50
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I think it's you know, everybody out there who's
• 4:53
  Speaker 4: influencing our you know, young people, our babies, our kids,
• 4:57
  Speaker 4: our teenagers.
• 4:59
  Speaker 3: You know.
• 5:00
  Speaker 4: We we just you know, we need good people around
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  Speaker 4: to influence. Uh, all the people that are coming up
• 5:06
  Speaker 4: in the world and model midless stuff.
• 5:08
  Speaker 3: We want them to be doing as well.
• 5:10
  Speaker 2: Yeah, you know. And her main point was, you know
• 5:14
  Speaker 2: this is this is not easy for for dads always
• 5:18
  Speaker 2: to to come together and have conversations about fatherhood. Uh.
• 5:23
  Speaker 2: We were too busy doing other things.
• 5:26
  Speaker 3: You know.
• 5:26
  Speaker 2: I was thinking and and I was thinking about that
• 5:28
  Speaker 2: conversation with this with this lady, really nice lady, Jessica
• 5:36
  Speaker 2: I think her name was, and it got it got
• 5:40
  Speaker 2: crawling around in my head. I'm like, can you imagine
• 5:44
  Speaker 2: if there was a Vermont fatherhood an actual location, which
• 5:49
  Speaker 2: of course you have right here on North Main Street
• 5:53
  Speaker 2: in every city or town maybe not townless two hundred
• 5:59
  Speaker 2: and two hundred and fifty two, but in every city. Yeah,
• 6:07
  Speaker 2: just in Vermont alone. Yeah, there's one that I know of,
• 6:13
  Speaker 2: and it's right here in Berry. There might be another
• 6:16
  Speaker 2: one in Burlington, but frankly, with the population there, there
• 6:20
  Speaker 2: should be five. But can you imagine? Can you imagine?
• 6:25
  Speaker 2: And then it was like, think beyond Vermont, I mean,
• 6:28
  Speaker 2: what if this was the case, like in every state?
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  Speaker 2: What if this was dare I say, a new trend
• 6:38
  Speaker 2: where fatherhood organizations were clubs whatever you want to call them,
• 6:44
  Speaker 2: or popping up everywhere?
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  Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, that'd be pretty amazing.
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  Speaker 4: Pretty I think that that's you know, that's part of
• 6:50
  Speaker 4: the work, is you know, doing doing what's happening here
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  Speaker 4: in Berry and Washington County.
• 6:53
  Speaker 3: And and then.
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  Speaker 4: Also how does this work become, you know, on a
• 6:58
  Speaker 4: greater scale, become more available to other people. And one
• 7:02
  Speaker 4: of the things that I part of the work that
• 7:04
  Speaker 4: I do is I've been working with parent child centers.
• 7:06
  Speaker 4: And so there are fifteen parent child centers in the state.
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  Speaker 4: There's three in jit In County, but then there's one
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  Speaker 4: in every county. And so I've been working with Parent
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  Speaker 4: Child Centers to work with their staff on how they
• 7:17
  Speaker 4: can better engage fathers, how they can support dads, how
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  Speaker 4: they can develop programs for dads, how they can hire
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  Speaker 4: you know, men to run programs for dads, and also
• 7:26
  Speaker 4: to engage the dads that already come up and see how.
• 7:29
  Speaker 3: They can get involved.
• 7:30
  Speaker 4: So it's actually really cool because that's actually sort of
• 7:33
  Speaker 4: like it's like, you know, spreading that idea that if
• 7:36
  Speaker 4: we engage dads, they're really positive.
• 7:38
  Speaker 3: Benefits for the family.
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  Speaker 4: And so I've been working with I think four or
• 7:42
  Speaker 4: five Parent Child centers to help them do that, and that's.
• 7:46
  Speaker 3: That's pretty cool.
• 7:47
  Speaker 4: So maybe there's not a Roman fatherhood, but there's fromondn
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  Speaker 4: fatherhood influence and people are really excited about how they
• 7:52
  Speaker 4: can better engage dads and having those conversations and supporting
• 7:56
  Speaker 4: dads and the benefits that I think, you know, the
• 7:59
  Speaker 4: com unity has when when dads are getting some support.
• 8:03
  Speaker 2: And you're doing you're you're integrating some work over at
• 8:07
  Speaker 2: the Family Center in Washington County, right.
• 8:09
  Speaker 4: A little bit of work together. We're working on more collaboration.
• 8:13
  Speaker 4: I had actually used to work. I used to go
• 8:16
  Speaker 4: with Chris Robinson was there years ago, used to go
• 8:19
  Speaker 4: to the Dad's and Dinner night there, and then I
• 8:21
  Speaker 4: did about.
• 8:22
  Speaker 3: A year and a half, I was facilitating that group.
• 8:24
  Speaker 3: And now.
• 8:26
  Speaker 4: David, one of their staff, does the dad and Dad
• 8:29
  Speaker 4: and dinner and then gets a good deal of dad's
• 8:32
  Speaker 4: coming out.
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  Speaker 2: And they do some play groups that dads do with
• 8:36
  Speaker 2: their kids too.
• 8:37
  Speaker 4: They do yeh her Dad's plays that that Thursday night
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  Speaker 4: is really dad's getting together with their kids and hanging
• 8:42
  Speaker 4: out and connecting with other dads and and having a
• 8:45
  Speaker 4: meal together. I mean, when we eat together, it's always
• 8:47
  Speaker 4: a nice connection. So that's happening, That's happened in other places,
• 8:51
  Speaker 4: you know, little little.
• 8:52
  Speaker 3: Pockets here and there.
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  Speaker 4: But I agree more of it, and I think, you know,
• 8:55
  Speaker 4: really helping dads with some of the tough stuff that
• 8:57
  Speaker 4: comes up and redefining their role as a dad and
• 9:01
  Speaker 4: super important.
• 9:01
  Speaker 2: Sure, you know, when you're in here, it's just you
• 9:05
  Speaker 2: and I and it's it's just two guys. And you know,
• 9:11
  Speaker 2: we don't and we say this all the time, we
• 9:14
  Speaker 2: don't have all the answers. We're both dads for sure.
• 9:18
  Speaker 2: You let's see, age eleven, you've got four kids, eleven, fifteen,
• 9:25
  Speaker 2: seventeen and thirty four.
• 9:27
  Speaker 3: Good job. Nice. That's it.
• 9:30
  Speaker 2: That's it. And we've talked about this almost every Monday.
• 9:33
  Speaker 2: That's a spread right there.
• 9:34
  Speaker 3: Man.
• 9:34
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean, wow, I can't believe your hair is black.
• 9:39
  Speaker 2: But here's the thing we talk about relatability. We all
• 9:45
  Speaker 2: have different ages that we're dealing with with with our kids,
• 9:48
  Speaker 2: different stages in life. Some are really young, some are
• 9:51
  Speaker 2: some are older, and there's there's so many gearshifts here.
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  Speaker 2: I mean, my little girl's eleven, and I'm trying to
• 10:01
  Speaker 2: hang on tight to all of the changes that are
• 10:04
  Speaker 2: coming physically, mentally, emotionally. You know, it hit me this
• 10:09
  Speaker 2: morning in the kitchen like a ton of bricks that
• 10:14
  Speaker 2: I looked across at her, and I know we're both
• 10:18
  Speaker 2: not really big in the tall department, but I looked
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  Speaker 2: across man, and she was eye level with me, and
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  Speaker 2: it hit me like a I'm telling you, look a train.
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  Speaker 2: And I'm like, oh my god. And I'm glad that
• 10:37
  Speaker 2: you know that she's grown and everything, but it's it's
• 10:40
  Speaker 2: like I will never be able to do this again
• 10:43
  Speaker 2: and look down at her and I just had all
• 10:47
  Speaker 2: these flashbacks of her, you know, when I would come
• 10:50
  Speaker 2: home of this little tiny creature running across the kitchen
• 10:56
  Speaker 2: and jumping into my arms and now she's eye level
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  Speaker 2: with me, and.
• 11:00
  Speaker 3: That that's.
• 11:03
  Speaker 2: It's it's a great feeling, but it's also a tough
• 11:07
  Speaker 2: feeling that I know that I can never go back. Yeah,
• 11:10
  Speaker 2: and and look down at my little tiny girl.
• 11:13
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
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  Speaker 4: Well that's you know, a tribute to you and all
• 11:16
  Speaker 4: the hard work of of you know, raising her and getting.
• 11:19
  Speaker 3: To where she is however, you know, tall or whatever.
• 11:21
  Speaker 3: I mean, I think that's that's the thing.
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  Speaker 4: It's like, we're trying to raise human beings to be
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  Speaker 4: great adults and great people. And and I think that that's,
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  Speaker 4: you know, that's the work, and and that's the payoff,
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  Speaker 4: is that that she is looking at you eye level
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  Speaker 4: and telling you how she thinks and feels and and
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  Speaker 4: you know, being together.
• 11:39
  Speaker 2: We've had some amazing conversations, you and I, Josh. The
• 11:44
  Speaker 2: last time you were in here, we were talking about
• 11:46
  Speaker 2: how the word no is a loving word. We talked
• 11:51
  Speaker 2: about setting boundaries and setting up some parameters to to
• 11:57
  Speaker 2: stay within. We we've talked about natural consequences, an awful
• 12:01
  Speaker 2: lot uh, setting healthy limits, tough love, not being the
• 12:11
  Speaker 2: friend parent, which can be tough at times. We want
• 12:18
  Speaker 2: to be liked by our kids, but every now and
• 12:21
  Speaker 2: then we have to be the bad guy. We've we've talked,
• 12:24
  Speaker 2: we've talked about all of these things. One of the
• 12:29
  Speaker 2: things that we've also talked about is reacting quickly and
• 12:37
  Speaker 2: reacting emotionally to your kids. Something bad happens. You know,
• 12:46
  Speaker 2: you're you're running late, your kids in the car. You're
• 12:53
  Speaker 2: moving along, and you missed the train crossing, and the
• 13:00
  Speaker 2: and the the thing comes down, and now you've got
• 13:04
  Speaker 2: to sit and you're forced to and it's a freight train,
• 13:10
  Speaker 2: and there's a million cars reacting quickly and emotionally, which,
• 13:18
  Speaker 2: my god, I mean, we're all guilty of it, I
• 13:23
  Speaker 2: certainly am. But you've got an opportunity right there. You're
• 13:28
  Speaker 2: on display, your kids are watching you constantly. How you're
• 13:32
  Speaker 2: going to react to this. Yeah, I've thrown some fits.
• 13:37
  Speaker 2: I've thrown my adult temperate tantrums. I'm seeing your smile.
• 13:42
  Speaker 2: You have to oh yeah, yeah, yeah, I mean, but
• 13:46
  Speaker 2: what do you do? There are a couple of different things.
• 13:48
  Speaker 4: I mean, one is, you know, just to go at
• 13:50
  Speaker 4: the picture that you're painted, like being at the railroad
• 13:53
  Speaker 4: crossing and You're like, you know, you're already running five
• 13:55
  Speaker 4: minutes late, and you know, and and how do you respond?
• 13:58
  Speaker 4: And I think, you know, yeah, we could throw our
• 14:02
  Speaker 4: arms up, and you know I told you to get
• 14:04
  Speaker 4: your shoes ready. If you would have had your shoes ready,
• 14:06
  Speaker 4: you know, blah blah blah, right, all the stuff. And
• 14:11
  Speaker 4: so there's this thing, it's your fault.
• 14:13
  Speaker 2: It's totally like, if you had listened to me, we
• 14:16
  Speaker 2: would have been through this train cross And I think
• 14:20
  Speaker 2: that's you.
• 14:20
  Speaker 3: Know, that's true probably.
• 14:23
  Speaker 4: And there are a couple of other things that happened.
• 14:25
  Speaker 4: One is like, you know, I used to when I
• 14:28
  Speaker 4: maybe we had this conversation, but I used to, you know,
• 14:29
  Speaker 4: really struggle to get my two little ones, Oliver, who
• 14:32
  Speaker 4: are now seventeen and fifteen, and you know, out the
• 14:35
  Speaker 4: door before when they were like preschool in kindergarten, and
• 14:38
  Speaker 4: it was super stressful, and I just remember like I
• 14:41
  Speaker 4: was kind of doing my thing, they were doing their thing.
• 14:43
  Speaker 4: And then finally, you know, there was this moment where
• 14:45
  Speaker 4: I was remember yelling at them and I was just like,
• 14:48
  Speaker 4: I just can't do this, you know, I was doing
• 14:50
  Speaker 4: you know, it was in the morning pairing for a
• 14:51
  Speaker 4: while and I was just that like, I just can't
• 14:53
  Speaker 4: do this if.
• 14:54
  Speaker 3: I'm to be doing this for the next fifteen years,
• 14:56
  Speaker 3: No way.
• 14:57
  Speaker 4: So I just you know, realized that there were things
• 14:59
  Speaker 4: that I could do that would be different to set
• 15:01
  Speaker 4: things up to be a little bit better. So no,
• 15:03
  Speaker 4: it's easy to kind of you know, our kids, we
• 15:05
  Speaker 4: put on our kids sometimes in that way. But just like, yep,
• 15:08
  Speaker 4: I could have done five minutes earlier, knowing that all
• 15:11
  Speaker 4: the things can happen. The other piece, which is the
• 15:13
  Speaker 4: piece where you're at the railroads crossing and you say,
• 15:16
  Speaker 4: you know what song you want to listen to whatever
• 15:18
  Speaker 4: the thing is, and just put on a song or
• 15:20
  Speaker 4: be like, you know whatever you can do. You know,
• 15:23
  Speaker 4: there's that moment too, I mean you could Here's the
• 15:25
  Speaker 4: thing about being a parent and the power of being
• 15:28
  Speaker 4: I'll just say a dad, but being a parent, being
• 15:30
  Speaker 4: a dad is you know.
• 15:32
  Speaker 3: Saying, oh, what's going on in school today?
• 15:34
  Speaker 4: You know, oh, man, these trains or you know heavy
• 15:38
  Speaker 4: I want to really, I really want to ride on
• 15:39
  Speaker 4: a train. I've I've been on an Amtrak train in so long.
• 15:43
  Speaker 4: I just really want to be on a train. Reframing totally,
• 15:46
  Speaker 4: just you know, you are the creator of the masterpiece,
• 15:50
  Speaker 4: and at that moment you can really decide how you
• 15:52
  Speaker 4: bring the energy. My son, Calvin, he's fifteen, is learning
• 15:55
  Speaker 4: how to drive, and he's like, you know, he kind
• 15:57
  Speaker 4: of has a little exasperated thing when somebody cuts off,
• 16:00
  Speaker 4: cuts off or somebody's driving slow, and I just say,
• 16:03
  Speaker 4: just yeah, can't do anything about it, man, what's in
• 16:05
  Speaker 4: your control?
• 16:06
  Speaker 3: You know, just chill out.
• 16:08
  Speaker 4: And so those things are the pieces that you know,
• 16:10
  Speaker 4: how do we do that? Because if we do, if
• 16:12
  Speaker 4: every time we get caught or late and we're pissed off, yeah,
• 16:16
  Speaker 4: these don't go our way, that is one hundred percent
• 16:20
  Speaker 4: going to be ingrained in our kids that things.
• 16:22
  Speaker 3: Didn't go my way.
• 16:22
  Speaker 4: So I'm pissed off, I'm gonna start blaming somebody else.
• 16:25
  Speaker 4: And that is the thing that lasts for a really
• 16:27
  Speaker 4: long time. It lasts for years, and it lasts for generations.
• 16:30
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 16:31
  Speaker 4: You know, my dad when we got late, boy, he
• 16:33
  Speaker 4: just flew off the handle. Whatever the thing is, right,
• 16:36
  Speaker 4: so's opportunity. And it's not easy because you don't want
• 16:39
  Speaker 4: to be late. But if you can't do anything about it,
• 16:40
  Speaker 4: you're not going to run through the train, you know,
• 16:43
  Speaker 4: sit back for a minute. Ask your kid how their
• 16:45
  Speaker 4: day is. Yeah, and or what's going on today? Say
• 16:47
  Speaker 4: what's going on? You're thirty two today, you know, whatever
• 16:50
  Speaker 4: the thing is. And all of a sudden, the train's
• 16:52
  Speaker 4: gone and you're back on the road.
• 16:53
  Speaker 3: Yeah, you know.
• 16:55
  Speaker 2: And even if you need to take your quiet, internal
• 17:01
  Speaker 2: deep breath, even though in your head you're cussing everyone
• 17:07
  Speaker 2: in anything out, even if you have to act, even
• 17:12
  Speaker 2: if you have to kind of put a smile on
• 17:13
  Speaker 2: your face, you're being watched.
• 17:16
  Speaker 3: Yeah. Yeah.
• 17:18
  Speaker 4: My my son Oliver, who's really likes he doesn't agree
• 17:21
  Speaker 4: with the speed limit.
• 17:23
  Speaker 3: He was He's telling me, He's like, why are you
• 17:25
  Speaker 3: driving slow now?
• 17:25
  Speaker 4: He said to me, he said, I said, well, now
• 17:28
  Speaker 4: you're you pay attention. You used to not pay attention
• 17:30
  Speaker 4: when I was driving, But now you really pay attention
• 17:33
  Speaker 4: to what I'm driving, the speed i'm driving, how i'm driving,
• 17:35
  Speaker 4: if I go over the line. So when you really
• 17:37
  Speaker 4: pay attention, I need to make sure that I'm on
• 17:39
  Speaker 4: point and so.
• 17:41
  Speaker 3: But I used to, you know, not worry about that
• 17:43
  Speaker 3: so much.
• 17:43
  Speaker 4: But now it's like, I know you're I know you're
• 17:45
  Speaker 4: watching because this is important to you.
• 17:47
  Speaker 3: Now. Used to not be important, but now it is,
• 17:49
  Speaker 3: so I got to think.
• 17:50
  Speaker 2: About how I do it. What an analogy that is
• 17:52
  Speaker 2: right there?
• 17:52
  Speaker 3: You know? But you know, you know, he said, why
• 17:54
  Speaker 3: do you drive slow? Because you.
• 17:59
  Speaker 4: Right, you're gonna be driving you know these we were
• 18:02
  Speaker 4: driving the highway yesterday. I get the practice on the
• 18:03
  Speaker 4: highway and he was he was like, you know, He's like,
• 18:06
  Speaker 4: but but if you go seventy five, you get there faster.
• 18:09
  Speaker 4: And we did a little calculator of how much faster
• 18:11
  Speaker 4: you actually get somewhere, which is really not that much.
• 18:13
  Speaker 4: And asked him how long it was going to take
• 18:15
  Speaker 4: to get him to earn the two hundred dollars ticket
• 18:17
  Speaker 4: that he's going to get for speeding.
• 18:19
  Speaker 3: Sow many hours to save that two minutes.
• 18:21
  Speaker 2: In points on the license and insurance rates and yeah,
• 18:24
  Speaker 2: all of that sure, and he's how old seventeen seventeen? Okay?
• 18:30
  Speaker 2: This morning I had yet another example of reacting quickly,
• 18:39
  Speaker 2: to just stop for a second and think before you
• 18:44
  Speaker 2: say anything or react. And it was the example of
• 18:50
  Speaker 2: my little girl in every every day I drive her
• 18:53
  Speaker 2: to school and I'm running a little behind this morning,
• 18:59
  Speaker 2: my fault full transparency here, and she was like, Dad,
• 19:04
  Speaker 2: can you walk me? Can you walk me into school today?
• 19:09
  Speaker 2: The second she asked me that, the second she asked
• 19:13
  Speaker 2: me that I would, And then but I didn't show
• 19:20
  Speaker 2: it on the face, but I slammed the brakes on
• 19:25
  Speaker 2: of what was in my head, and I was like, Yo,
• 19:31
  Speaker 2: today's Monday. Her last day of school is Friday. You
• 19:41
  Speaker 2: need to walk her into school? How could you say
• 19:47
  Speaker 2: I can't today? I'm running late?
• 19:50
  Speaker 3: How could you you could? If you know you got
• 19:55
  Speaker 3: a couple more days left?
• 19:57
  Speaker 4: You say, you know what, I'll make sure tomorrow will
• 19:59
  Speaker 4: get out the door early, and I'll make sure I
• 20:00
  Speaker 4: walk in and today, you know, and so and yes,
• 20:05
  Speaker 4: you know, maybe the days are limited, but the fact
• 20:07
  Speaker 4: that you're bringing her in every day, you have these
• 20:09
  Speaker 4: moments of time every day that you're doing it. And
• 20:12
  Speaker 4: so there's forgiveness and flexibility on her part that you know,
• 20:16
  Speaker 4: I think that you could ask for and and that
• 20:20
  Speaker 4: just say, yeah, today's not the day, but tomorrow, definitely,
• 20:24
  Speaker 4: you know, we'll get we'll get up, you know, get
• 20:26
  Speaker 4: out the door five minutes early.
• 20:27
  Speaker 3: So I can make sure I do that, and then
• 20:28
  Speaker 3: she has something to look forward to.
• 20:30
  Speaker 2: My little girl has taught me to live with two
• 20:36
  Speaker 2: words always in the forefront of my mind, which are
• 20:41
  Speaker 2: what if. And quickly I said to myself, what if
• 20:46
  Speaker 2: today was your last day? My last day? And I said, no,
• 20:54
  Speaker 2: I'll do it tomorrow. I'll walk here tomorrow. And that
• 20:58
  Speaker 2: that entered the knoggin real fast, and I it was
• 21:06
  Speaker 2: a no brainer for me, absolutely. And furthermore, I'm not
• 21:11
  Speaker 2: going to rush. I'm not going to rush at all.
• 21:14
  Speaker 2: I'm going to slowly park my truck and we're going
• 21:18
  Speaker 2: to get out, and we're going to slowly walk to
• 21:21
  Speaker 2: school and I'm going to hold your hand. And and
• 21:23
  Speaker 2: we did. And it was fantastic, fantastic man, living living with,
• 21:29
  Speaker 2: living without regrets like that, in the fear of of
• 21:34
  Speaker 2: what if? What if I don't have this opportunity ever again?
• 21:38
  Speaker 2: How will how? How will she? You know, what if
• 21:43
  Speaker 2: I don't come home at the end of the day today,
• 21:45
  Speaker 2: what is she going to remember that the last day,
• 21:48
  Speaker 2: that that I that she was with me, that I said,
• 21:51
  Speaker 2: I I can't, I'm running a little bit late. I'll
• 21:54
  Speaker 2: I'll do it tomorrow. So I timed to myself, and
• 22:06
  Speaker 2: the last thing I did before I shut my truck
• 22:08
  Speaker 2: off was I looked down at the clock and when
• 22:11
  Speaker 2: I got back to my truck, and I took my
• 22:14
  Speaker 2: damn time too. When I got back to my truck,
• 22:18
  Speaker 2: I looked at the clock. Three minutes, Josh, yeah, right,
• 22:24
  Speaker 2: three minutes.
• 22:26
  Speaker 3: Three minutes. Yeah, it took me three minutes to do it. Yeah.
• 22:29
  Speaker 4: And I had that precious, precious moment, precious time and
• 22:34
  Speaker 4: and and you know it's I will say, yeah that
• 22:38
  Speaker 4: for her and Regart, you know, set aside more. But
• 22:42
  Speaker 4: just like that, her day gets started off because she asked,
• 22:45
  Speaker 4: she wanted to go with her dad, and that meant
• 22:47
  Speaker 4: a lot to her. And so she had that and
• 22:50
  Speaker 4: and you know, as opposed to because sometimes you know,
• 22:54
  Speaker 4: dad said no, and then all of a sudden you
• 22:55
  Speaker 4: get another no, and you get another you know, things
• 22:57
  Speaker 4: not quite going your way, but you set the day
• 22:59
  Speaker 4: off in the right way. And that means a lot,
• 23:02
  Speaker 4: even just in this moment. And for you to know
• 23:05
  Speaker 4: that and to know that you kind of put on
• 23:07
  Speaker 4: the brakes and had a thought like, let me just
• 23:09
  Speaker 4: think about how you know what I am I to
• 23:11
  Speaker 4: do here.
• 23:12
  Speaker 2: I think what I love most about having you in
• 23:16
  Speaker 2: here on the second Monday of the month is the
• 23:23
  Speaker 2: message that we put out and it's honestly, in like
• 23:26
  Speaker 2: we started out this morning, it's not just about dads,
• 23:28
  Speaker 2: it's about parents. We all have different relationships with our kids,
• 23:36
  Speaker 2: and they're all different ages. Some of them are healthy,
• 23:39
  Speaker 2: some of them need work, some of them you know whatever.
• 23:43
  Speaker 2: But just no matter who you are, where you are,
• 23:47
  Speaker 2: what stage you're in life, or what's going on in
• 23:50
  Speaker 2: your own personal life, just stop for a second and
• 23:54
  Speaker 2: just think about your kid. You brought them into this world,
• 24:02
  Speaker 2: give them, frankly, the respect of what they deserve, which
• 24:08
  Speaker 2: is your time.
• 24:10
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 24:11
  Speaker 4: Well, I think that there's the time is there, and
• 24:15
  Speaker 4: it's I think it's a two way thing as well.
• 24:17
  Speaker 4: And I don't mean two way in like your kids
• 24:18
  Speaker 4: give you their time, but I think it's two ways
• 24:21
  Speaker 4: and that you know, you give them being there and
• 24:23
  Speaker 4: give them what they need and and and give them
• 24:26
  Speaker 4: as much as you.
• 24:26
  Speaker 3: Can of what they want. But also I think what
• 24:29
  Speaker 3: it does.
• 24:29
  Speaker 4: For us in terms of that relationship, you know, of
• 24:32
  Speaker 4: being with our kids and and you know, I think
• 24:35
  Speaker 4: it does a lot.
• 24:36
  Speaker 3: You know, it's like it's it's you know a lot
• 24:39
  Speaker 3: of we do.
• 24:40
  Speaker 4: We put a lot of work out to our kids
• 24:42
  Speaker 4: in terms of helping them, you know, be safe, get
• 24:45
  Speaker 4: what they need. But I think it's a lot, does
• 24:47
  Speaker 4: a lot for us. I mean I think that that's
• 24:48
  Speaker 4: you know, I feel like and and I've.
• 24:51
  Speaker 3: Talked about this before.
• 24:52
  Speaker 4: We're growing up without a dad and then being a
• 24:54
  Speaker 4: dad has been very big for me to be able
• 24:56
  Speaker 4: to sort of, you know, do the things that I
• 24:59
  Speaker 4: you know, wish my head that had done with me.
• 25:01
  Speaker 4: Have that relationship and be present and be in their
• 25:04
  Speaker 4: lives and.
• 25:06
  Speaker 3: Means a lot.
• 25:06
  Speaker 4: And and so I think there's a lot for us
• 25:08
  Speaker 4: as parents that our kids do and to really recognize that, Like,
• 25:11
  Speaker 4: it really is a lot to be able to have
• 25:13
  Speaker 4: that unconditional, loving relationship with another person and to help
• 25:17
  Speaker 4: them grow and I have just good experiences and.
• 25:19
  Speaker 3: Have fun with each other. I think it means a lot.
• 25:21
  Speaker 4: I think that's the two way piece where it's it's
• 25:23
  Speaker 4: it's got two parts to it.
• 25:24
  Speaker 3: I should say, yeah.
• 25:25
  Speaker 2: So you grew up without a dad. Yep, you know
• 25:31
  Speaker 2: the statistics of kids who grew up without dads. But
• 25:38
  Speaker 2: do you do you know what some of them are?
• 25:40
  Speaker 2: I don't have them memorized.
• 25:42
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't know.
• 25:43
  Speaker 4: I don't have the stat's memorize I see stats, you know,
• 25:46
  Speaker 4: I've looked at them over time a lot, and I
• 25:48
  Speaker 4: just I don't I'm always kind of like take it
• 25:49
  Speaker 4: with a grain of salt. But people, you know, if
• 25:51
  Speaker 4: you grow up without a dad, the chances of your
• 25:54
  Speaker 4: kids growing up without you, like it increases, right if
• 25:56
  Speaker 4: you grew up without a dad. And then some you know,
• 25:58
  Speaker 4: cyclical of single parenthood, single moms in particular, you know,
• 26:04
  Speaker 4: raising their kids because the dad isn't present. And it
• 26:06
  Speaker 4: could have been the case for me, you know, could
• 26:07
  Speaker 4: have been I had met my Jordan and his mom
• 26:11
  Speaker 4: in back in Minnesota, and I'm from and and she
• 26:14
  Speaker 4: decided she was going to have him here on the
• 26:16
  Speaker 4: East Coast and raised men Vermont. And there's a point
• 26:19
  Speaker 4: when you know it wasn't working out. We really raised
• 26:22
  Speaker 4: him not being together, but we did raise him together.
• 26:25
  Speaker 4: But it was like I could have been like, yep,
• 26:27
  Speaker 4: not going, I'm not going to Vermont, She's not going
• 26:29
  Speaker 4: to Minnesota, and you know, here we go, you know
• 26:32
  Speaker 4: around whatever it is of a generational fatherhood absence not
• 26:37
  Speaker 4: being there, you know, and and so you know, had
• 26:42
  Speaker 4: that choice, you know. And I think there's a lot
• 26:43
  Speaker 4: about the choices we make and how we be and
• 26:45
  Speaker 4: how we're involved. And I also think, you know, in
• 26:48
  Speaker 4: other scenarios of dads that I work with, it's some
• 26:51
  Speaker 4: really hard situations, and it's you know, there's some really
• 26:54
  Speaker 4: combative things that make it hard for dads to stay involved.
• 26:56
  Speaker 3: And sometimes guys want to give up. You know, it's
• 27:00
  Speaker 3: it's it's hard to do the battle.
• 27:02
  Speaker 4: And and that's the part where I think a lot
• 27:05
  Speaker 4: of the work that I do is supporting dads to
• 27:07
  Speaker 4: you know, stick with it and be with their kids
• 27:09
  Speaker 4: and how important their role is and and even if
• 27:11
  Speaker 4: it's not as much as they would like to make
• 27:13
  Speaker 4: those be you know, to your you know, point earlier
• 27:16
  Speaker 4: of just quality time, that little bit of time and
• 27:19
  Speaker 4: make it the best of it. If I'm supervising a visit,
• 27:22
  Speaker 4: and if a guy's visiting the kid for an hour
• 27:24
  Speaker 4: a week, make that the best hour that you can.
• 27:28
  Speaker 4: You get to be super dead. You can be the
• 27:29
  Speaker 4: best dad and be there and be present with your kids.
• 27:32
  Speaker 4: And and it's hard because it's not nearly enough, but
• 27:35
  Speaker 4: I think it's important. And I also recognize there are
• 27:38
  Speaker 4: just you know, for different reasons dads aren around and
• 27:42
  Speaker 4: and and that's you know, I know, for me, I
• 27:45
  Speaker 4: spent many many years, you know, and it's still there.
• 27:48
  Speaker 4: But you know, wishing I had a dad, you know,
• 27:50
  Speaker 4: even as an adult man, wishing I had a dad
• 27:53
  Speaker 4: there too, you know, Dad, look what I'm doing, you know,
• 27:58
  Speaker 4: and and not having that there, I think there's some
• 28:01
  Speaker 4: significant sadness there for a lot of guys who grow
• 28:04
  Speaker 4: up without you know, their dad and their life.
• 28:08
  Speaker 3: I don't want to say especially boys, but.
• 28:09
  Speaker 4: You know, I know for a lot of men that
• 28:11
  Speaker 4: having that, you know, not have that relationship with their
• 28:14
  Speaker 4: dad they wanted or dad around, is really difficult and
• 28:18
  Speaker 4: it leads to I think them not doing well because
• 28:22
  Speaker 4: they you know, they kind of how do I be
• 28:23
  Speaker 4: in the world. You know, there's a lot of a
• 28:25
  Speaker 4: lot of stuff that I think. I think moms do
• 28:27
  Speaker 4: a ton, they do so much, and I think that
• 28:30
  Speaker 4: the one thing, you know, Dad, am I doing this right?
• 28:34
  Speaker 3: You know as a man? How am I as a man?
• 28:35
  Speaker 4: And really wanting that validation you know, from from from
• 28:40
  Speaker 4: your dad or your grandfather, uncle, or whoever your father
• 28:42
  Speaker 4: figure is. It's really important for us to get that assurance.
• 28:46
  Speaker 4: And when it's not there, it's hard.
• 28:49
  Speaker 2: You know, you're you're you're talking about some really personal
• 28:54
  Speaker 2: stuff here. But you know, I just have to ask you,
• 28:59
  Speaker 2: is this is this stuff that still rents space in
• 29:04
  Speaker 2: your head? How old are you? You and I are
• 29:06
  Speaker 2: about the same age, righty four? All right, fifty four?
• 29:09
  Speaker 2: Does this weigh on you? Does it crawl around in
• 29:12
  Speaker 2: your head every now and then rent any space in
• 29:14
  Speaker 2: your mind?
• 29:15
  Speaker 3: Yeah?
• 29:15
  Speaker 4: Well, i'd probably say my heart.
• 29:18
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 29:19
  Speaker 4: You know, I think for a long time, and I
• 29:20
  Speaker 4: think this is unfortunately common where when guys grow up
• 29:24
  Speaker 4: without their dad, they kind of can unknowingly hold it
• 29:29
  Speaker 4: against their mom.
• 29:31
  Speaker 3: That's pretty powerful stuff.
• 29:33
  Speaker 4: I know I did for years and then I separated
• 29:35
  Speaker 4: from that piece of it. I actually recently had a
• 29:38
  Speaker 4: moment where I was, you know, feeling overwhelmed and feeling
• 29:42
  Speaker 4: you know, like but I wanted to wish I had
• 29:44
  Speaker 4: my dad to talk to, and realizing.
• 29:46
  Speaker 3: You know, that he's not there. This fifty four, This
• 29:50
  Speaker 3: is recent.
• 29:50
  Speaker 4: This is like a month ago, and I was talking
• 29:53
  Speaker 4: to my therapist and I just said, you know, like, yeah,
• 29:56
  Speaker 4: I'm sad about that.
• 29:57
  Speaker 3: It came out of.
• 29:57
  Speaker 4: Nowhere and I started like crying and I was like, yeah,
• 30:00
  Speaker 4: like fifty four years old, I don't even know who
• 30:02
  Speaker 4: he is, don't even I didn't even lose anybody, you know.
• 30:05
  Speaker 3: What I mean.
• 30:05
  Speaker 4: It's like just this idea concept of a dad being
• 30:09
  Speaker 4: able to tell him, you know, what I'm doing, and
• 30:11
  Speaker 4: you know, looking for some support or guidance or whatever
• 30:14
  Speaker 4: advice or he just acknowledge like I'm doing okay.
• 30:17
  Speaker 3: You know, was like very you know, was really sad.
• 30:20
  Speaker 4: And I realized for a lot of guys that sadness
• 30:22
  Speaker 4: is there and and you know, any basic psychologists to
• 30:26
  Speaker 4: tell you like that sadness can often turn into anger
• 30:29
  Speaker 4: or in word, can be take it on ourselves or
• 30:31
  Speaker 4: own hurt.
• 30:31
  Speaker 3: We can tell on other people.
• 30:33
  Speaker 4: But I think it's true for a lot of people
• 30:35
  Speaker 4: who don't, you know, didn't have that relationship with their dad,
• 30:37
  Speaker 4: you know, that they really wish they did and didn't
• 30:42
  Speaker 4: really know what to do with those thoughts and feelings
• 30:45
  Speaker 4: you know, space in our heads, space in our hearts
• 30:47
  Speaker 4: about that and then all of a sudden, our dad
• 30:49
  Speaker 4: and how do we do that?
• 30:51
  Speaker 3: That was when I think it really came to be
• 30:53
  Speaker 3: like how do I be a dad?
• 30:54
  Speaker 4: I got I got a boy, and how do I
• 30:56
  Speaker 4: be a dad when I didn't have a dad? I
• 30:59
  Speaker 4: did come to the realizeation that I get to create
• 31:01
  Speaker 4: whatever that is on my own, which is pretty powerful.
• 31:04
  Speaker 3: Big epiphany for me. But I think that's you know,
• 31:08
  Speaker 3: that was it took some time to get there, you know.
• 31:11
  Speaker 2: And and the inspiration behind being a great dad was
• 31:19
  Speaker 2: the fact that you didn't have one. I am going
• 31:23
  Speaker 2: to be the dad, the father to my kids that
• 31:29
  Speaker 2: I wish that I had.
• 31:32
  Speaker 4: Yeah, you might, that's that's the hit the nail on
• 31:36
  Speaker 4: the head. I think that's that is that is that
• 31:39
  Speaker 4: part of that is a lot of that and so
• 31:43
  Speaker 4: you know, that's that's the opportunity, that's the healing, that's
• 31:46
  Speaker 4: the that's the juice. Man, when you like can realize that,
• 31:50
  Speaker 4: you know, I get to suddenly do this and be
• 31:53
  Speaker 4: this and like, oh what I wanted my dad to
• 31:55
  Speaker 4: play legos? I want my dad to run around with
• 31:56
  Speaker 4: me and chase me and pick me up and wrestle
• 31:58
  Speaker 4: with me and twirl me around and do all these things.
• 32:01
  Speaker 3: It's like that's powerful. It's powerful as a man to.
• 32:04
  Speaker 4: Do that and feel I think I've healed a lot
• 32:05
  Speaker 4: from because I've started having four boys, I've had a
• 32:08
  Speaker 4: lot of opportunities to do that and just just how
• 32:12
  Speaker 4: you know how important that is too, because you know,
• 32:16
  Speaker 4: my dad's never going to show up, so like how
• 32:18
  Speaker 4: you know, I need to figure out how I'm gonna
• 32:20
  Speaker 4: deal with that. And I think being a dad and
• 32:22
  Speaker 4: being playful and fun and doing all that stuff was
• 32:25
  Speaker 4: what I was good at and what I what I
• 32:27
  Speaker 4: took on and so pretty important to me. And and
• 32:31
  Speaker 4: you know, I've think that that's been my biggest attribute,
• 32:35
  Speaker 4: is just playing with my kids and having fun with them.
• 32:38
  Speaker 4: And you know, that's relationship building, connecting all the good
• 32:42
  Speaker 4: stuff that comes.
• 32:43
  Speaker 3: It's a big part of parenting, not all of it,
• 32:44
  Speaker 3: but it's a big part of that for me.
• 32:46
  Speaker 2: But there's another side of the coin here, and it's
• 32:50
  Speaker 2: seems like it's all too often. The reality is that
• 32:54
  Speaker 2: those of us who grew up without dads were you know,
• 32:59
  Speaker 2: whatever it is, is seventy percent more likely to smoke cigarettes,
• 33:04
  Speaker 2: to have sex at an early age, to get arrested,
• 33:09
  Speaker 2: to do time in jail. I mean, the list is
• 33:14
  Speaker 2: pretty long here, And I know you've read these stats.
• 33:18
  Speaker 2: I have to. Anyone could google it. Those of us
• 33:22
  Speaker 2: grown up without a dad, but also those of us
• 33:26
  Speaker 2: growing up with a dad or a or a mom
• 33:32
  Speaker 2: who for whatever reason is not the greatest of parent.
• 33:43
  Speaker 2: We tend to be creatures of habit. We tend to
• 33:49
  Speaker 2: do be what we've had modeled to us. We echo
• 33:57
  Speaker 2: that my dad hit me with a belt, I'm going
• 34:03
  Speaker 2: to do the same thing to my kids because that's
• 34:07
  Speaker 2: what I know, that is the norm, that's how we
• 34:11
  Speaker 2: deal with discipline. Whatever. Yeah, my dad was a drunk,
• 34:15
  Speaker 2: or my mom was a drunk. I'm a drunk. Yeah,
• 34:19
  Speaker 2: I mean, this is what I'm familiar with, this is
• 34:21
  Speaker 2: what I know. We echo that. But for someone like you,
• 34:26
  Speaker 2: And there's a couple different kinds of people here. There's
• 34:29
  Speaker 2: those that do as they know, as they've learned, as
• 34:33
  Speaker 2: they've experienced, and then there's those who say, I had
• 34:39
  Speaker 2: a crappy mom, I had a crappy dad. I was
• 34:44
  Speaker 2: raised that way. But by god, am I going to
• 34:49
  Speaker 2: clear the slate and start over and be the parent,
• 34:54
  Speaker 2: be the parent that my parent wasn't.
• 35:00
  Speaker 3: Yeah? Yeah, no, that's there is.
• 35:02
  Speaker 4: I'm trying to figure out what that secret sauce is
• 35:04
  Speaker 4: that somebody is able to say, I'm going to do
• 35:06
  Speaker 4: it differently. You know, I'm gonna I'm gonna change the
• 35:09
  Speaker 4: cycle here, shift it. You know, the generational stuff that's happened, and.
• 35:14
  Speaker 3: And it's it's hard.
• 35:15
  Speaker 4: You know, you're fighting the things that you know or
• 35:18
  Speaker 4: you're you know, the sort of the demons, the tendencies,
• 35:20
  Speaker 4: the habits, the ways of parenting that you've learned for
• 35:23
  Speaker 4: so many years, and how do you do that differently?
• 35:25
  Speaker 4: And I think there's you know, some folks are able
• 35:27
  Speaker 4: to do that and be conscious about, you know, how
• 35:30
  Speaker 4: they are parenting, how they say things to their kids,
• 35:32
  Speaker 4: you know, all the different things in the way they
• 35:35
  Speaker 4: they they are. And I don't know what that secret
• 35:38
  Speaker 4: sauce is. I think that some people do. I think
• 35:40
  Speaker 4: sometimes you know, I was talking with some of the
• 35:42
  Speaker 4: other day about just what I'm doing and and just
• 35:45
  Speaker 4: how redefining fatherhood, redefining you know, what we do. And
• 35:49
  Speaker 4: I think it's you know, we don't have those conversations
• 35:51
  Speaker 4: so much, you know, and and sometimes especially if you're
• 35:54
  Speaker 4: isolated and you don't have a lot of other people
• 35:57
  Speaker 4: to see how they do things, you can really replicate
• 36:00
  Speaker 4: that very unconsciously. You don't even know that you're doing.
• 36:02
  Speaker 4: All of a sudden, you're like, oh my gosh, here
• 36:03
  Speaker 4: I am my dad. And so that's our you know
• 36:06
  Speaker 4: a lot of things that I you know, trying to
• 36:08
  Speaker 4: build it from my fatherhood is like community of guys
• 36:10
  Speaker 4: coming together, whether it.
• 36:12
  Speaker 3: Be a playgroup or a dad's group, because the.
• 36:14
  Speaker 4: More community we have, the more we get to see
• 36:16
  Speaker 4: other versions of parenting, we get to learn, we get
• 36:19
  Speaker 4: to decompress. Say oh, my gosh, my kid is bloody, bladdy,
• 36:22
  Speaker 4: and people say, yeah, I know it's hard, but you're
• 36:24
  Speaker 4: gonna be okay. And that stuff really matters a lot.
• 36:27
  Speaker 4: We need that, we need other people to help us
• 36:29
  Speaker 4: with that, and you know, like, I mean, that's the
• 36:32
  Speaker 4: whole thing.
• 36:32
  Speaker 3: You know.
• 36:33
  Speaker 4: I hope people call me up and say, hey, I'm
• 36:35
  Speaker 4: just I'm struggling. I'm not doing this, I'm not I
• 36:37
  Speaker 4: can't quite figure this thing out. I'm really having a
• 36:39
  Speaker 4: hard time with reacting to my kid, or discipline or
• 36:42
  Speaker 4: being patient with.
• 36:44
  Speaker 3: My two year old. And to just call up and say, hey.
• 36:46
  Speaker 4: You know, can we have a conversation about it, to
• 36:48
  Speaker 4: talk about it because we don't know and we're trying
• 36:51
  Speaker 4: to undo some pretty you know, if we were raised
• 36:53
  Speaker 4: in a household that you know, had some struggles, you know,
• 36:56
  Speaker 4: major struggles.
• 36:57
  Speaker 3: That's eighteen years.
• 36:58
  Speaker 4: Of seeing that stuff, you know, and and it's hard
• 37:01
  Speaker 4: to undo eighteen years of seeing that kind of parent
• 37:04
  Speaker 4: being parented that way, and then how do we just
• 37:06
  Speaker 4: do something different?
• 37:08
  Speaker 2: I met I met a woman once who said to me,
• 37:13
  Speaker 2: wasn't never was hit, never was yelled at, like verbally
• 37:19
  Speaker 2: abused or whatever, was always provided for. Was for the
• 37:27
  Speaker 2: most part, led a pretty good life. But she was
• 37:34
  Speaker 2: physically and emotionally neglected. Never told I love you, never
• 37:48
  Speaker 2: embraced with hugs, never put to bed, bedtime story, bedtime time,
• 37:58
  Speaker 2: how is your day? But blah blah, was just sent
• 38:03
  Speaker 2: to bet. Everything was very structured, and man that that
• 38:08
  Speaker 2: reared it's ugly head la later in life. Be there
• 38:12
  Speaker 2: for your kids physically emotionally.
• 38:15
  Speaker 3: Yeah, it's so much. It's so much.
• 38:19
  Speaker 4: It's so hard, like day in and day out, you know,
• 38:22
  Speaker 4: And I think about people were single parents with multiple kids.
• 38:24
  Speaker 4: Oh my gosh, like to be able to do and
• 38:26
  Speaker 4: give the kids what they need all the time and
• 38:28
  Speaker 4: just you know, make ends meet and clean the house
• 38:30
  Speaker 4: and have the laundry ready, you know for the next day,
• 38:33
  Speaker 4: and all the stuff that you.
• 38:34
  Speaker 3: Need to do. And it is so hard.
• 38:35
  Speaker 4: That's why it's that's why we struggle, because it's a
• 38:38
  Speaker 4: really hard thing to do. To like even though you
• 38:40
  Speaker 4: weren't you know, necessarily physically abused, but that like, you know,
• 38:43
  Speaker 4: the parents who maybe and and and you know, there's
• 38:48
  Speaker 4: this great Noah Khan line in one of his songs
• 38:50
  Speaker 4: memory it's growing up, growing Up Sideways or something, where
• 38:53
  Speaker 4: it says, you know, I'm mad at my parents for
• 38:55
  Speaker 4: what their parents did to them. And so it's like
• 38:57
  Speaker 4: this thing that you know, just keeps on hitting us
• 39:00
  Speaker 4: over and over. Oh my, you know, my dad worked
• 39:01
  Speaker 4: all the time. He had to work all the time.
• 39:03
  Speaker 4: My mom was you know, whatever the thing was going on,
• 39:05
  Speaker 4: she was maybe she was working, maybe she was home,
• 39:07
  Speaker 4: but just like not getting that affection, not getting those
• 39:09
  Speaker 4: bedtime stories.
• 39:11
  Speaker 3: You know, it's it's so much to survive.
• 39:13
  Speaker 4: And I think it's really hard these days too, Like
• 39:15
  Speaker 4: financially it's hard. I think sometimes community can be hard.
• 39:19
  Speaker 4: You know, just where are the places where we get
• 39:21
  Speaker 4: together and see each other? It's not always that easy.
• 39:24
  Speaker 4: And having the means to get together and do the
• 39:27
  Speaker 4: fun things with our kids and and and meet other parents,
• 39:29
  Speaker 4: it's it's it's hard.
• 39:31
  Speaker 3: It's hard to do all this stuff.
• 39:33
  Speaker 2: And don't try to, you know, some of us try
• 39:36
  Speaker 2: to overcompensate too, but just remembered. You know, neglect is
• 39:43
  Speaker 2: there's a it's it's not always clear right in front
• 39:48
  Speaker 2: of us. You can't always see it and smell it. Yeah,
• 39:51
  Speaker 2: well neglect, but it's serious.
• 39:54
  Speaker 4: And those those you know, her parents didn't know, you know, yeah,
• 39:57
  Speaker 4: didn't know, didn't know how to, didn't know the value
• 40:00
  Speaker 4: of it.
• 40:01
  Speaker 3: And it just keeps on happening.
• 40:03
  Speaker 4: And so she's she's wrestling with that and and it's
• 40:07
  Speaker 4: and it's it's really hard, but it continues, right, and
• 40:09
  Speaker 4: how do we break out of that?
• 40:11
  Speaker 3: Yeah? You know, what's what's the way we do that?
• 40:13
  Speaker 2: This is the types of conversations that we as guys
• 40:19
  Speaker 2: need to have. Being a father is super, super super important.
• 40:24
  Speaker 2: You're definitely not going to be a perfect father, but
• 40:28
  Speaker 2: being present and being there for your kids and saying, yeah,
• 40:33
  Speaker 2: I'm sorry, I screwed up whatever, I'm sorry, I had
• 40:38
  Speaker 2: an argument with your mom, whatever it may be, but
• 40:45
  Speaker 2: the buck stops with me, and I will have your
• 40:48
  Speaker 2: back always, even if I'm angry with you or disappointed
• 40:54
  Speaker 2: in you, I will have your back.
• 40:58
  Speaker 4: And I think being there, I think, you know, for
• 41:00
  Speaker 4: for us to be able to you know, one of
• 41:01
  Speaker 4: the things that I've I'm learning more and more is
• 41:04
  Speaker 4: it's it's hard to ask for help. It's hard to
• 41:06
  Speaker 4: say we're not being a good, good dad, and and
• 41:10
  Speaker 4: to to show up somewhere and say those things right sure,
• 41:14
  Speaker 4: and and but I will tell you the other side
• 41:17
  Speaker 4: of that is when you do that, when you do
• 41:19
  Speaker 4: ask for help, you usually get it. And when you're
• 41:23
  Speaker 4: able to say I'm not being the best you know
• 41:25
  Speaker 4: right now, or I may be the worst version of
• 41:28
  Speaker 4: myself as a parent, I need to do differently, you know,
• 41:32
  Speaker 4: to say that and say, well, let's do it. And
• 41:33
  Speaker 4: and as I've you know, been kind of my message
• 41:35
  Speaker 4: to guys lately is you can start today being the
• 41:38
  Speaker 4: best dad.
• 41:38
  Speaker 3: Like this is. Let's talk about it. We'll talk about
• 41:41
  Speaker 3: how we do that.
• 41:42
  Speaker 2: Tuesdays you have a Dad's group.
• 41:46
  Speaker 3: Ye drop in Dad's group.
• 41:48
  Speaker 2: What's the cost on that? I know the answer, but
• 41:51
  Speaker 2: I just want you to say.
• 41:52
  Speaker 4: Yeah, it's free, no cost and every month fatherhood yeap, yep.
• 41:57
  Speaker 4: Right on North Main Street right above way, would you.
• 42:00
  Speaker 4: And we've got a great, great space there for kids
• 42:03
  Speaker 4: to play and we provide dinner and you know, guys,
• 42:07
  Speaker 4: the kids can kids can come yep. And you know,
• 42:10
  Speaker 4: guys tell me that after the first time they come,
• 42:12
  Speaker 4: they didn't know what to expect, and they say, well,
• 42:14
  Speaker 4: this is a lot better than I thought it was
• 42:15
  Speaker 4: going to be because I think they got a chance
• 42:17
  Speaker 4: to say a little bit of their story, what's going on,
• 42:19
  Speaker 4: what's hard, and they were well received by other guys.
• 42:23
  Speaker 4: And that is that's huge, you know, to be able
• 42:25
  Speaker 4: to tell our story, and one is important to tell
• 42:28
  Speaker 4: our story. The other one is to have people hear
• 42:30
  Speaker 4: our story and then also not be judged by that story. Yeah,
• 42:33
  Speaker 4: it's pretty tremendous.
• 42:34
  Speaker 2: Relatability is so so powerful. I know you have to scoot,
• 42:40
  Speaker 2: but I got to just close by saying, you know,
• 42:46
  Speaker 2: the other day, I was I was here and I
• 42:49
  Speaker 2: was just getting ready to leave, and this guy pops
• 42:54
  Speaker 2: his head in the door.
• 42:57
  Speaker 3: Here.
• 42:57
  Speaker 2: He's got a little girl with him, seven years old,
• 43:01
  Speaker 2: and I don't know this guy, he doesn't know me,
• 43:05
  Speaker 2: just popped in, Hey, what's this all about? What's going on?
• 43:09
  Speaker 2: Next thing, you know, we're in. We're having a great conversation.
• 43:12
  Speaker 2: His little girl's checking out all the equipment and everything,
• 43:15
  Speaker 2: and we're talking about life. Found out that he's a
• 43:22
  Speaker 2: single dad. And I was like, what are you guys
• 43:26
  Speaker 2: doing and he's like, we're just getting out. We're just
• 43:31
  Speaker 2: getting out, We're going out to dinner. It's just a
• 43:34
  Speaker 2: little seven year old blonde girl, beautiful. We're just getting out.
• 43:38
  Speaker 2: We're going we're just getting out of the house, going
• 43:40
  Speaker 2: out for dinner, and we're spending some time together. Then
• 43:43
  Speaker 2: I learned that his wife had recently passed away and
• 43:50
  Speaker 2: he was a single dad, which of course triggered me
• 43:54
  Speaker 2: to make sure that he knew about from ant fatherhood.
• 43:57
  Speaker 2: And he says, yeah, I've seen the sign. Never bit
• 44:00
  Speaker 2: in there. And I said, you tell me that you're
• 44:06
  Speaker 2: committed to a particular Tuesday, and I live pretty far away.
• 44:12
  Speaker 2: I'll be there on a on a Tuesday night, especially
• 44:16
  Speaker 2: now that softball is over for for my little girl,
• 44:19
  Speaker 2: Tuesday night's are freed up now until soccer starts. But
• 44:26
  Speaker 2: that's what that's that's what it's all about. I mean,
• 44:28
  Speaker 2: this guy, this was such a gift that I met
• 44:31
  Speaker 2: this guy. Yeah, what what a what a gift? I
• 44:36
  Speaker 2: was My heart was full the whole way home and
• 44:38
  Speaker 2: went home and told my wife about it right away,
• 44:41
  Speaker 2: and I'm like, look a lot of great things happen today.
• 44:44
  Speaker 2: But I got to tell you about this guy first.
• 44:48
  Speaker 3: Yeah, it's inspiring.
• 44:50
  Speaker 2: And hope. Man, there's some great people out there in
• 44:54
  Speaker 2: this world.
• 44:54
  Speaker 4: Dude, Yeah, there are great people. And and I think that,
• 44:57
  Speaker 4: you know, to be able to I mean I love
• 44:59
  Speaker 4: going to work every day and be able to help.
• 45:01
  Speaker 4: You know, even if one guy shows up and we
• 45:03
  Speaker 4: have a twenty minute conversation about being a dad, you
• 45:05
  Speaker 4: know how important that is. And and and you know,
• 45:08
  Speaker 4: maybe we'll getting back next time. And and just you know,
• 45:10
  Speaker 4: talking about being a dad and having holding space for
• 45:13
  Speaker 4: that in any way is whether it's in the community,
• 45:17
  Speaker 4: somebody stopping by, someone coming to a group at the
• 45:19
  Speaker 4: coffee shop, you know, it's really really important and to
• 45:23
  Speaker 4: build on that and and yeah, it's there's there's so
• 45:26
  Speaker 4: much to be said about that.
• 45:27
  Speaker 3: I love it.
• 45:28
  Speaker 2: That's uh, that's something that resonates with me big time.
• 45:32
  Speaker 2: Because here's the thing, and I've said this so many
• 45:34
  Speaker 2: times all close up by saying it right now, it
• 45:38
  Speaker 2: doesn't matter to me whether or not we've got a
• 45:43
  Speaker 2: thousand people watching or listening to us right now. What
• 45:49
  Speaker 2: matters to me is if we are connecting on any
• 45:55
  Speaker 2: level emotionally, whatever with anyone that's watching or listening to
• 46:02
  Speaker 2: this episode. Male, female, it doesn't matter, that's what matters. Yeah,
• 46:08
  Speaker 2: even if it's just one.
• 46:11
  Speaker 3: Yeah, really it's great. It's a great conversation.
• 46:13
  Speaker 4: And we get a chance to feed our own like
• 46:15
  Speaker 4: you know, being parents and talking about that and and
• 46:18
  Speaker 4: I think getting the word out there again, you know,
• 46:20
  Speaker 4: whoever's listening, and hopefully you know, somebody will hear it
• 46:23
  Speaker 4: and either send you know, send their partner along and
• 46:27
  Speaker 4: or they'll come themselves if they want to check in
• 46:30
  Speaker 4: and see what's going on up there.
• 46:31
  Speaker 2: So Tuesdays, five o'clock, five o'clock, Yeah, Romont Fatherhood right
• 46:37
  Speaker 2: next to Wabbie Jewelers, Ye, main Street, Barry. People can
• 46:42
  Speaker 2: get in touch with you social media. You're you're all
• 46:46
  Speaker 2: over social.
• 46:47
  Speaker 4: Media, yeah, Instagram now and Facebook and my my information,
• 46:51
  Speaker 4: my cell phone numbers on the door and you can
• 46:52
  Speaker 4: look up for a month fatherhood and find my if
• 46:54
  Speaker 4: you want to call, stop by email.
• 46:58
  Speaker 3: It's all there.
• 47:00
  Speaker 2: It's always so inspiring chatting with you. Second Monday of
• 47:02
  Speaker 2: the month, man, thank you for coming in here. Jan
• 47:05
  Speaker 2: appreciate you so much. Make sure to check out Vermont
• 47:08
  Speaker 2: Fatherhood again on social media. They're everywhere. They're doing amazing things.
• 47:14
  Speaker 2: They've got some they just had a big fundraiser. They're
• 47:17
  Speaker 2: gonna have more events coming up. Keep watch, pay attention,
• 47:21
  Speaker 2: and don't just get on Vermont Fatherhood, but follow, click follow,
• 47:26
  Speaker 2: click like, share it with your friends, tell your neighbors,
• 47:29
  Speaker 2: tell your friends, and just get out there and do
• 47:34
  Speaker 2: the right thing.
• 47:53
  Speaker 3: Bye.
• 47:53
  Speaker 2: Josh, what a great guy. Listen if you're if you're
• 48:01
  Speaker 2: impacted by an episode like this, share it, push it
• 48:10
  Speaker 2: out there, tell you friends about it, take notes, listen
• 48:16
  Speaker 2: to it again. And I got to tell you I
• 48:20
  Speaker 2: often go back and we'll re listen to an episode
• 48:24
  Speaker 2: that I have with Josh. It's good stuff for all
• 48:29
  Speaker 2: of us. Started out this morning with a weather forecast.
• 48:35
  Speaker 2: I'll give you more weather here in just a little
• 48:38
  Speaker 2: bit if you missed it or else. We're going to
• 48:39
  Speaker 2: run down some birthdays. But welcome to what the start
• 48:47
  Speaker 2: of the second week in June. Happy Monday. What a weekend.
• 48:53
  Speaker 2: It was so much happening, not just here in Barry.
• 49:00
  Speaker 2: We had Pride, which was a huge event. A lot
• 49:03
  Speaker 2: of people. We had the Weathered Barn grand opening that
• 49:08
  Speaker 2: took place on Saturday morning. Got a chance to get
• 49:12
  Speaker 2: over there and meet Tammy and her sister Nancy and
• 49:16
  Speaker 2: her daughters and a few other folks. What a great new, local,
• 49:27
  Speaker 2: family run business here in the Granite City. The Weathered Barn?
• 49:34
  Speaker 2: Where is it? And I saw a lot of I
• 49:37
  Speaker 2: saw a lot of that on Facebook. Where is the
• 49:40
  Speaker 2: Weathered Barn. It's directly across the street from Albashon Hardware,
• 49:46
  Speaker 2: the old State Farm building, that brown building, and they've
• 49:49
  Speaker 2: done a lot of upgrades to it the inside. It
• 49:51
  Speaker 2: was unbelievable. I walked in there. I couldn't believe it. Incredible.
• 49:55
  Speaker 2: Stop in, say hello to Tammy, buy something thing, support them.
• 50:02
  Speaker 2: We have new business right here in Barry. You want
• 50:09
  Speaker 2: to call it North Main Street you can. Technically it
• 50:14
  Speaker 2: is just out of the immediate central hub here of
• 50:19
  Speaker 2: the city. What half a mile. Get in there, say
• 50:24
  Speaker 2: hello to them, introduce yourself and welcome them and thank
• 50:29
  Speaker 2: them for starting up a family business. And I said
• 50:34
  Speaker 2: to Tammy, I'm like, you know, it's nice to see
• 50:38
  Speaker 2: something like really organic startup like this, not a franchise
• 50:43
  Speaker 2: coming in. I love it. Picked up a couple of
• 50:49
  Speaker 2: things for Sherilyn's birthday. I hope she's not listening right now.
• 50:56
  Speaker 2: Do the same. This weekend was. I know the weather
• 51:02
  Speaker 2: wasn't perfect, but man, it was just such a great weekend.
• 51:07
  Speaker 2: And I got to say right now before I forget,
• 51:10
  Speaker 2: because I know there's a comment here Shae Martin they
• 51:15
  Speaker 2: got second place at the Special Olympics Basketball Tournament. Shay, congratulations.
• 51:25
  Speaker 2: I'm so proud of you, guys and girls. I really am.
• 51:31
  Speaker 2: Special Olympics was massive at Saint Mike's this weekend. The
• 51:37
  Speaker 2: weekend started for me on Friday with uh, I don't
• 51:43
  Speaker 2: know if it's just something about this past Friday that
• 51:46
  Speaker 2: I won't forget. Not only was the sun shining and
• 51:48
  Speaker 2: it was a perfect to day, a little humid, but
• 51:52
  Speaker 2: Friday's thirtieth Annual Memorial Golf Tournament for Central Vermont Home
• 51:57
  Speaker 2: Health and Hospice was just so great. The country Club
• 52:00
  Speaker 2: of Barry, the conversations, the opportunity to meet and connect
• 52:07
  Speaker 2: with new people, folks that of course I know, it
• 52:12
  Speaker 2: was nice having a little laugh with Eddie Russ, John
• 52:17
  Speaker 2: Beyond Alilo from BCK Real Estate, presenting sponsor. Long time
• 52:26
  Speaker 2: here it aired out representing aired out on the golf course,
• 52:32
  Speaker 2: and I am and I'll be honest with you, and
• 52:35
  Speaker 2: I know John beyond Alilo is an amazing golfer. I
• 52:38
  Speaker 2: am so glad that I wasn't on the team with him.
• 52:45
  Speaker 2: He would have been beyond humiliated if I was out
• 52:49
  Speaker 2: on the course with him. I stayed the hell off
• 52:52
  Speaker 2: of that course. I stayed where I belonged, just close
• 53:00
  Speaker 2: to the kitchen. I enjoyed the food. It was just
• 53:03
  Speaker 2: so so nice. Thank you to the volunteers, the sponsors,
• 53:09
  Speaker 2: the players, the staff at the Country Club of Barry,
• 53:14
  Speaker 2: the entire staff at Central from Mount Home Health and
• 53:17
  Speaker 2: Hospice for what you do twenty four seven. It was awesome.
• 53:22
  Speaker 2: I don't know how much money was raised. I'll find
• 53:25
  Speaker 2: out at some point. And I don't know who won
• 53:28
  Speaker 2: the tournament. Did anyone get a hole in one and
• 53:31
  Speaker 2: win a new car? I don't think so. I think
• 53:36
  Speaker 2: they would have emailed me and told me so. But yeah,
• 53:40
  Speaker 2: it was just a fantastic weekend. The food trucks at
• 53:44
  Speaker 2: the Berlin Mall, I know, the rain and the weather
• 53:47
  Speaker 2: kind of scared off a good number of the food trucks.
• 53:50
  Speaker 2: There were only two there. But it was great. I
• 53:53
  Speaker 2: had laughs, I enjoyed unbelievable food. And I'm going to
• 54:02
  Speaker 2: be talking about these food trucks for a while. It's
• 54:05
  Speaker 2: just such a great experience with both of them. Every
• 54:09
  Speaker 2: single Sunday from noon to seven, they're doing this up
• 54:11
  Speaker 2: at the Berlin Mall in the back parking lot there
• 54:16
  Speaker 2: the Stephen Tracy Memorial Ride and poker run at the Den.
• 54:23
  Speaker 2: Big success. Over the weekend, we had the Mountaineers kicking
• 54:30
  Speaker 2: off their twenty fourth season at Recreation Field last night
• 54:36
  Speaker 2: in Montpellier with a win. Just awesome. And I want
• 54:45
  Speaker 2: to take a minute here and talk about the seventy
• 54:48
  Speaker 2: ninth Tony Awards last night. Schmigadoon won Best Musical. And
• 55:01
  Speaker 2: for those of you that are not familiar with Schmigadoon
• 55:10
  Speaker 2: and you haven't been on Broadway to see it this musical,
• 55:15
  Speaker 2: that's fine. But what you should know and be familiar
• 55:20
  Speaker 2: with is the fact that Central Vermont's own Sam beyond
• 55:26
  Speaker 2: A Lilo, was the producer of this Best Musical won
• 55:35
  Speaker 2: a Tony Award as a Broadway producer last night at
• 55:41
  Speaker 2: Radio City Music Hall. That is a big deal. Tell
• 55:47
  Speaker 2: me how many Central ver honors that you know who
• 55:54
  Speaker 2: are Tony Award winning. That was incredible to see that
• 56:03
  Speaker 2: last night and to read that post from John, That
• 56:08
  Speaker 2: Dad right there is light years beyond a proud father.
• 56:18
  Speaker 2: Uh what else did I want to talk about? Let's
• 56:24
  Speaker 2: give you the forecast. As I said, sun clouds today
• 56:28
  Speaker 2: right up against eighty degrees from most of us in
• 56:31
  Speaker 2: central Vermont anyway, Tonight clear, low in the fifties. Tuesday
• 56:36
  Speaker 2: Tomorrow is going to be hot, partly cloudy, eighty five degrees.
• 56:45
  Speaker 2: I'm hoping that my little seedlings that I have started
• 56:50
  Speaker 2: for the uh, for the garden, are going to like
• 56:53
  Speaker 2: this weather, because so far they're they're they're not doing great.
• 56:59
  Speaker 3: You know.
• 56:59
  Speaker 2: One of the thank Dwayne for my tomato plants, which
• 57:06
  Speaker 2: have their own story. Do tomato plants have stories? Could they? Possibly?
• 57:15
  Speaker 3: Yes? They do.
• 57:16
  Speaker 2: Will those stories of these tomato plants ever make it
• 57:21
  Speaker 2: on the air? Possibly? I might wait till Friday. I
• 57:24
  Speaker 2: think I will. Gee will be on and we're just
• 57:27
  Speaker 2: gonna let loose. So the rain comes in Wednesday, Thursday,
• 57:32
  Speaker 2: Friday this week eighties for daytime highs all three days,
• 57:38
  Speaker 2: but wet weather, rain. I'm glad I get the weed
• 57:42
  Speaker 2: whacker working. Can't keep up with that. But this weekend,
• 57:48
  Speaker 2: this coming weekend, at this point, looks fantastic. Please know
• 57:52
  Speaker 2: I am keeping an eye on it. I will let
• 57:54
  Speaker 2: you know I watch the weather every day. Birthdays Today
• 58:00
  Speaker 2: we have Louis Moot on the list. Happy Birthday, Louie, Louie,
• 58:05
  Speaker 2: Louey Lewis, Jim Shah, Happy birthday, Uh, Jason Bouthiller, Steve Noyes,
• 58:16
  Speaker 2: Nancy Willie, Lorraine Bishop, Robin Grace. Yesterday, Lorie Shepherd, Happy
• 58:21
  Speaker 2: birthday Shep. Today is a National Best Friends Day today,
• 58:29
  Speaker 2: So let's come up with the n FBQ A Facebook
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  Speaker 2: Question of the day right here off off the top
• 58:36
  Speaker 2: of here. I haven't even posted this up. I will
• 58:39
  Speaker 2: Facebook Question of the day. Have you what was the
• 58:47
  Speaker 2: worst if you if you dare to share the worst
• 58:52
  Speaker 2: fight that you had with a best friend and how
• 58:57
  Speaker 2: did you get through it? Yeah, thirteen days to Father's
• 59:05
  Speaker 2: Day thirteen and I've had a couple of people say, Jad,
• 59:11
  Speaker 2: what are you doing for Father's Day? You got plans.
• 59:14
  Speaker 2: I know that Friday the nineteenth, the Mayo Healthcare Center
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  Speaker 2: in Northfield is going to be doing a Father's Day
• 59:26
  Speaker 2: car show. Cool cars, cool Dad's coffee in the hand,
• 59:35
  Speaker 2: hot rods. It's going to be a great day. From
• 59:39
  Speaker 2: eleven till two. They're going to have the barbecue fired up.
• 59:42
  Speaker 2: Get to Northfield, bring your car whatever it is. It
• 59:46
  Speaker 2: doesn't have to be a classic, it could be anything.
• 59:50
  Speaker 2: But if you just so happen to have a you know,
• 59:53
  Speaker 2: a sixty nine Chevelle convertible in the garage, maybe bring
• 1:00:00
  Speaker 2: it to Mayo Healthcare on Friday the nineteenth. Vicky over there,
• 1:00:06
  Speaker 2: the director of activities, doing a hell of a job
• 1:00:09
  Speaker 2: getting this all organized together. Speaking of car shows, Wow,
• 1:00:14
  Speaker 2: you've heard us talking an awful lot about Upper Valley
• 1:00:17
  Speaker 2: cars and coffee, Central Vermont Cars and Caffeine. We're going
• 1:00:24
  Speaker 2: to be chatting with them as well. There's a ton
• 1:00:30
  Speaker 2: of stuff going on with cars right now. For automobile enthusiasts.
• 1:00:35
  Speaker 2: You are in your glory. The one coming up this
• 1:00:40
  Speaker 2: coming Sunday will be at Berlin Health and Rehab, Central
• 1:00:47
  Speaker 2: Vermont Cars and Caffeine, and I'll be don't worry. I'll
• 1:00:52
  Speaker 2: make sure. I'll make sure that you don't forget morning, Patty.
• 1:01:00
  Speaker 2: What else did I want to tell you? I just
• 1:01:06
  Speaker 2: got so much here in front of me. Oh, the
• 1:01:11
  Speaker 2: Flag Day ceremony on Sunday the fourteenth at the Barry Elks.
• 1:01:16
  Speaker 2: They reached out to me, I'll be there at least
• 1:01:19
  Speaker 2: that's the plan. Eleven o'clock is when it starts. Keep
• 1:01:23
  Speaker 2: an eye on aired out. You're going to see this
• 1:01:26
  Speaker 2: and many other community events happening. I want to just
• 1:01:32
  Speaker 2: give a shout this morning before I forget. There's a
• 1:01:36
  Speaker 2: lot of things that I'm sure I'm going to forget
• 1:01:38
  Speaker 2: about I always do. What was that one thing that
• 1:01:45
  Speaker 2: I really wanted to tell you, I'll find it. It's
• 1:01:49
  Speaker 2: right here here. It is the Barry Lions Club and
• 1:01:57
  Speaker 2: it was just I just found out about this last night.
• 1:02:00
  Speaker 2: Hosting the Central Vermont Annual Disc Golf Championship at the
• 1:02:05
  Speaker 2: Cory's Disc Golf Course. Mark Tatrow, Mary Ellen and the
• 1:02:14
  Speaker 2: maybe a few other crew members have been working so
• 1:02:18
  Speaker 2: hard on this to get this event off the ground
• 1:02:22
  Speaker 2: every year. The teams are set, the sponsors have stepped up,
• 1:02:29
  Speaker 2: prizes are coming together. It's going to be fantastic. I
• 1:02:35
  Speaker 2: think it's the fourteenth of June. I've got a little
• 1:02:39
  Speaker 2: bit of a discrepancy here on that, but I believe
• 1:02:42
  Speaker 2: it is. I'll find out for damn sure and let
• 1:02:45
  Speaker 2: you know, okay, and probably probably even throw a microphone
• 1:02:51
  Speaker 2: in Mark Tatro's face, which he's had done many times
• 1:02:56
  Speaker 2: from me and can handle it well. Five thirty is
• 1:02:58
  Speaker 2: when it starts. Volunteers need to arrive by four o'clock.
• 1:03:03
  Speaker 2: It is going to be amazing. Speaking of the Lions Club,
• 1:03:10
  Speaker 2: one nine hundred and eighty eight dollars and eleven cents
• 1:03:17
  Speaker 2: was raised during their recent coin drop right here on
• 1:03:21
  Speaker 2: North Main Street in Barry, and the club rounded it
• 1:03:25
  Speaker 2: up to two thousand dollars two grand. Where's the money going?
• 1:03:33
  Speaker 2: You're asking the Barry Lions charitable organizations that they're always
• 1:03:47
  Speaker 2: connected with, is where it's going to be going this
• 1:03:50
  Speaker 2: time around. It's going to be going to families who
• 1:03:53
  Speaker 2: are fighting pediatric cancer to help with non medical expenses.
• 1:04:02
  Speaker 2: Let's say this District forty five, the Barry Lions Club
• 1:04:09
  Speaker 2: has you back two grand in a matter of a
• 1:04:14
  Speaker 2: couple of hours. I love that. Let's see what else
• 1:04:19
  Speaker 2: is going on in the community calendar, which, by the way,
• 1:04:21
  Speaker 2: is brought to you by the World Newspaper Central, Vermont's
• 1:04:25
  Speaker 2: favorite weekly newspaper. Dep Phillips will be joining me Wednesday
• 1:04:30
  Speaker 2: morning on the air to give you a snapshot of
• 1:04:33
  Speaker 2: what's in it. Vtdashworld dot Com. Tuesday, we got the
• 1:04:38
  Speaker 2: dinner at the American Legion right down the road Post
• 1:04:41
  Speaker 2: ten Wednesday. We got wingading Wednesday. I think I shared
• 1:04:46
  Speaker 2: that up this morning at the VFW Post seven ninety
• 1:04:49
  Speaker 2: five o'clock Wednesday. Also Curry your Park every Wednesday through September.
• 1:04:55
  Speaker 2: The food trucks, the farmers market, the live music. It's
• 1:04:59
  Speaker 2: going to be great. Don't freak out about the weather
• 1:05:03
  Speaker 2: just yet. Okay, Thursday Bingo at the Canadian Club. What
• 1:05:08
  Speaker 2: else do we have happening? Central Vermont Home Health and
• 1:05:13
  Speaker 2: Hospice on Tuesday. Has there volunteer with hospice program. It's
• 1:05:17
  Speaker 2: going to be at the Den at two o'clock. Yes,
• 1:05:20
  Speaker 2: they're one of my presenting sponsors, has been for a
• 1:05:23
  Speaker 2: long time, and we're gonna be pushing that. I want
• 1:05:26
  Speaker 2: to make sure everyone knows about it. If you'd like
• 1:05:28
  Speaker 2: to help out with the hospice program over at Central
• 1:05:32
  Speaker 2: Vermont Home Health and Hospice Tuesday at two o'clock at
• 1:05:35
  Speaker 2: the Den, they'll tell you exactly how to do it
• 1:05:38
  Speaker 2: and what's needed. Sh my gosh, look at this toy
• 1:05:45
  Speaker 2: Story five coming out on the nineteenth. There's a good
• 1:05:51
  Speaker 2: number of people that are freaking out about that huge
• 1:05:55
  Speaker 2: toy story fans. I'm going to be at one of
• 1:05:59
  Speaker 2: the theaters. I don't know if it's gonna be the
• 1:06:00
  Speaker 2: Paramount or the Capitol Showplace. I haven't been told yet,
• 1:06:06
  Speaker 2: but Cindy will let me know, and I'll be streaming
• 1:06:09
  Speaker 2: live at one of those theaters for opening night on
• 1:06:13
  Speaker 2: the nineteenth Father's Day weekend. Toy Story five Woody Popcorn, candy,
• 1:06:25
  Speaker 2: Soda and Toy Story five Lily, a couple of her friends.
• 1:06:31
  Speaker 2: It's gonna be great. I can't wait that weekend Father's
• 1:06:37
  Speaker 2: Day weekend. Look at this so much happening. The Quechi
• 1:06:41
  Speaker 2: Balloon Festival is launching. Literally, we got the lam Oyl
• 1:06:47
  Speaker 2: Area Cancer Network hosting their Lacing Up for Cancer on
• 1:06:51
  Speaker 2: the twentieth Sunday, the twentieth. That's gonna be huge. Up
• 1:06:55
  Speaker 2: of People's Academy just had them on the air recently.
• 1:07:00
  Speaker 2: Just glancing here, look at this second annual Downtown Berry
• 1:07:03
  Speaker 2: Wing Walk on the twenty seventh of June. July is packed.
• 1:07:09
  Speaker 2: I'm almost over just overwhelmed by July. Here, my gosh,
• 1:07:14
  Speaker 2: Lake Borie Summer Concert Series. I'll be at every single
• 1:07:17
  Speaker 2: one of them. Cannot wait. Upper Valley Cars and Coffee
• 1:07:23
  Speaker 2: July twelfth, the Powerhouse Mall August. Oh my god, I
• 1:07:31
  Speaker 2: just where am I going? What are we thunder Road?
• 1:07:35
  Speaker 2: What do we have Thursday? Do we have racing Thursday Night?
• 1:07:39
  Speaker 2: This coming? We do? No Saturday, No White Mountain Motorsports
• 1:07:46
  Speaker 2: Park on Saturday, regular event, New England Antique Racers This
• 1:07:54
  Speaker 2: coming Saturday, Thursday coming. Don't worry, Becky, I won't forget
• 1:08:05
  Speaker 2: Casellaway Systems, Nostalgia Night, New England Auto Racers plus the
• 1:08:13
  Speaker 2: Marvin Johnson Memorial and Scout Night all Scouts in uniform
• 1:08:20
  Speaker 2: get in free Thursday Night thunder Road. What that's of
• 1:08:30
  Speaker 2: course makes me think about the Mountaineers. They continue their
• 1:08:36
  Speaker 2: homestand tonight, if I've got this right, is today June eighth.
• 1:08:43
  Speaker 2: It is tonight against the North Adams Steeplecats six thirty
• 1:08:48
  Speaker 2: and last night a pitcher's duel thirty one combined strikeouts
• 1:08:58
  Speaker 2: last night at Recreation Fees with the Mountaineers, who finally
• 1:09:04
  Speaker 2: in the fifth got their first win of the season.
• 1:09:07
  Speaker 2: And it was on opening night in Montpellier Beaten North
• 1:09:10
  Speaker 2: Shore three to one last night. I know, not high scoring,
• 1:09:14
  Speaker 2: but still great game from what I'm told. Gosh, you
• 1:09:18
  Speaker 2: want to go tonight. I want to go tonight. Make
• 1:09:22
  Speaker 2: sure you keep up with all of the games with
• 1:09:27
  Speaker 2: the Mountaineers. A bookmark the Vermont Mountaineers dot com, follow
• 1:09:33
  Speaker 2: women on on x and Instagram and Facebook. They are
• 1:09:39
  Speaker 2: our newest presenting sponsor. Right here, it aired out and
• 1:09:42
  Speaker 2: I'm thrilled Vermont Mountaineers. Can't wait to get to a game.
• 1:09:48
  Speaker 2: Will I eat a hot talk? Maybe two Stanley Cup Finals?
• 1:09:55
  Speaker 2: What else is this going on? In sports? Logan Loose
• 1:09:59
  Speaker 2: will be on Thursday. He's gonna run it down for
• 1:10:01
  Speaker 2: you know me. Nicks and Spurs facing off for Game
• 1:10:09
  Speaker 2: three of the NBA Championship tonight eight thirty. Donald Trump
• 1:10:19
  Speaker 2: will be in the crowd and the security in New
• 1:10:26
  Speaker 2: York is insane for tonight's game. The World Cup gets
• 1:10:35
  Speaker 2: underway Thursday. US is going to be taking on Paraguay,
• 1:10:38
  Speaker 2: by the way, on the twelfth. That's this coming Friday.
• 1:10:42
  Speaker 3: Wow.
• 1:10:43
  Speaker 2: UFC Freedom two fifty is going on on the fourteenth.
• 1:10:49
  Speaker 2: US Open starts in the eighteenth, and again all of
• 1:10:53
  Speaker 2: this and more Thursday with Logan Loose and his Athletics podcast.
• 1:10:59
  Speaker 2: Right here you are Now it's Kevin Durant really heading
• 1:11:03
  Speaker 2: to the Timberwolves. It's Kyrie Irving leaving the MAVs. The
• 1:11:11
  Speaker 2: Bulls really involved. Logan's going to be talking about all
• 1:11:16
  Speaker 2: this stuff. Okay. Thanks to Josh Miller for coming in
• 1:11:22
  Speaker 2: this morning, for having a real conversation. Josh Miller from Vermont.
• 1:11:31
  Speaker 2: Fatherhood second Monday of every month, and I already have
• 1:11:41
  Speaker 2: things that I want to talk with them about next month.
• 1:11:46
  Speaker 2: Love having a conversation with that guy about being a dad,
• 1:11:49
  Speaker 2: being a father. Stay well, be good, try to be
• 1:11:57
  Speaker 2: don't forget to like, share any episode that you enjoyed.
• 1:12:02
  Speaker 2: Thanks for following the page, Thanks for watching listening on YouTube.
• 1:12:11
  Speaker 2: I could sit here and go on and on and
• 1:12:16
  Speaker 2: on about how many people watch, how many people listen,
• 1:12:21
  Speaker 2: how many followers there are now. But I've always maintained,
• 1:12:28
  Speaker 2: even back way back into my radio days, that it's
• 1:12:35
  Speaker 2: just not about that. What it is about is connecting.
• 1:12:42
  Speaker 2: If it's one person, if it's three people, if it's
• 1:12:45
  Speaker 2: five people, That's what matters more than anything else. I
• 1:12:53
  Speaker 2: have fantastic rest of your day, God bless We'll catch
• 1:12:56
  Speaker 2: it tomorrow right here on the Air Out podcast. Cyrus
• 1:13:02
  Speaker 2: Doucharm and Evan Barron from eight oh two Meets and
• 1:13:08
  Speaker 2: cruises Ethos Racing Club tomorrow morning, right here where you
• 1:13:13
  Speaker 2: are now aired OWT