Latest / Two Doting Dads with Matty J & Ash / #261 Fast Dates, Fajitas & Flight Dramas

Transcript

#261 Fast Dates, Fajitas & Flight Dramas · Two Doting Dads with Matty J & Ash

0:00
Speaker 1: I have a very important update for you on the
0:02
Speaker 1: Wix household. I'm busting to tell someone. April, my beautiful wife,
0:10
Speaker 1: who was on last week's episode.
0:11
Speaker 2: Yes.
0:12
Speaker 3: She's been very busy with lots of different activities, so
0:14
Speaker 3: I want to know which one.
0:16
Speaker 2: Update on all or just one?
0:17
Speaker 4: Just one for now.
0:19
Speaker 2: Okay. Drip feed me the updates.
0:21
Speaker 4: April has a new bicycle.
0:23
Speaker 2: A new what?
0:24
Speaker 4: Bicycle.
0:24
Speaker 2: Oh, they said basketball. I was like, she's playing basketball?
0:27
Speaker 4: She can do it all.
0:28
Speaker 2: Fucking hell.
0:28
Speaker 4: LeBron. I love that line.
0:47
Speaker 2: Welcome back to Two Doting Dads, I'm Matty J.
0:49
Speaker 4: And I'm Ash.
0:50
Speaker 2: This is a podcast all about parenting. It is the good,
0:53
Speaker 2: it is the bad.
0:53
Speaker 4: And the relatable.
0:55
Speaker 2: And we don't give advice.
0:56
Speaker 4: No, we don't. And I know what you're thinking. Listeners
0:58
Speaker 4: out there are like, so fucking what? So what? It's
1:00
Speaker 4: a bike.
1:01
Speaker 1: You're not understanding this. My wife has never learned how
1:04
Speaker 1: to ride a bike.
1:04
Speaker 4: Well, I did briefly teach her.
1:06
Speaker 3: Have you ever pulled Frank, her dad, aside and said,
1:10
Speaker 3: that's child abuse? What you've done here, raising her in
1:13
Speaker 3: this world, it's like keeping her locked in the basement.
1:15
Speaker 1: I don't know how to do things in the Johnson household,
1:17
Speaker 1: but I like to keep my in-laws on side.
1:20
Speaker 4: Fair. Okay? I need him.
1:23
Speaker 3: Have you ever, like, Christmas one time after when you
1:26
Speaker 3: were drinking gone, you know.
1:27
Speaker 2: What, Frank?
1:28
Speaker 4: Do you know what? Frank?
1:31
Speaker 2: Do you feel guilty?
1:32
Speaker 4: No, no, no, no, no, no. Settle down. I know
1:35
Speaker 4: you're there.
1:35
Speaker 2: Shut up. You never have. Never had the inkling.
1:38
Speaker 4: Nah, look, it's just not.
1:40
Speaker 1: The juice isn't worse than the squeeze, which is a
1:43
Speaker 1: famous saying from Matthew Johnson.
1:45
Speaker 2: So she never, never, just for the record, was never
1:47
Speaker 2: taught as a kid.
1:48
Speaker 4: Never taught as a kid.
1:49
Speaker 1: She has with me on a big grassy field once,
1:52
Speaker 1: gave her a go on a bike. And I know
1:54
Speaker 1: that she can do it. She's just anxious about it all.
1:57
Speaker 1: But the kids are really into their bikes at the moment.
2:00
Speaker 1: Oscar's just upgraded to a bigger bike. He's getting quick.
2:03
Speaker 1: He's getting adventurous. And he wants his mom to join him.
2:05
Speaker 1: And she really wants to join him. So I took
2:07
Speaker 1: her to the bike shop. Okay, we measured her up
2:11
Speaker 1: for the correct bicycle.
2:12
Speaker 2: We got ice cream.
2:14
Speaker 4: We got ice cream.
2:14
Speaker 1: She was well behaved. She was well behaved. Special trade bicycle.
2:18
Speaker 1: I got one too because I needed a new bike
2:20
Speaker 1: as well.
2:21
Speaker 3: Did you, for April's bike choice, did you let her
2:25
Speaker 3: decide or did you get someone over to.
2:27
Speaker 2: Say, hey, look, she's, She needs, yeah, okay.
2:29
Speaker 1: Yeah, look, Macy came along with us, so I was
2:31
Speaker 1: distracted with the baskets for Macy.
2:34
Speaker 2: They love, the kids love.
2:35
Speaker 4: A basket, don't they?
2:36
Speaker 1: No, do you know what she really is loving and
2:38
Speaker 1: she wants for her birthday? Streamers. No, like the dolly
2:42
Speaker 1: bike seat. So it's like a baby seat for kids.
2:45
Speaker 4: As she walked in there, she was like, look at that.
2:50
Speaker 2: They are obsessed, aren't they?
2:51
Speaker 5: Do you know they don't make bike baskets for boys? Wow.
2:55
Speaker 2: How do you know this?
2:57
Speaker 4: Look, we're already balls deep in one petition. We could
3:00
Speaker 4: start another one.
3:01
Speaker 5: Well, I thought that's a bit slack for the boys.
3:03
Speaker 2: Because the boys were.
3:04
Speaker 5: Because Louis wanted one.
3:05
Speaker 2: Yeah, like Louis is like, where am I going to
3:06
Speaker 2: put my dinosaurs?
3:07
Speaker 5: Yeah, he's like, really sorry, we've only got those girls ones.
3:08
Speaker 5: I'm like, I mean.
3:09
Speaker 4: Where are we going to put all my Hot Wheels cars?
3:11
Speaker 4: Where are we going to put all my important things? Lego.
3:14
Speaker 3: You could have like a little briefcase thingamajig.
3:17
Speaker 4: It's a briefcase. He's got to hold it on the
3:20
Speaker 4: side like a businessman.
3:21
Speaker 2: Boys can have baskets too. This bike comes with two briefcases.
3:31
Speaker 1: No it's one of those you know when you see
3:33
Speaker 1: um like bike riders that have been riding a real
3:35
Speaker 1: long distance they got the satchel over the back it's
3:38
Speaker 1: like a camel yeah they're the boys are more utility
3:42
Speaker 1: bikes girls are more like streamers and the thing so
3:45
Speaker 1: i will be teaching april how to ride a bike.
3:48
Speaker 5: Oh cannot wait for that content and i will.
3:50
Speaker 1: Be filming it she doesn't know i'm gonna film it I'm.
3:54
Speaker 2: Sure she's like.
3:55
Speaker 4: She's not stupid.
3:55
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm sure she's going to be like. I never
3:57
Speaker 2: said that. What do you mean the camera's coming? You're
4:00
Speaker 2: there with like a tripod film crew.
4:02
Speaker 4: Yeah, like a home cam, camcorder. We're doing a documentary.
4:05
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'll get my nan's home camcorder to slide flip open.
4:09
Speaker 2: So when did you buy the bike?
4:10
Speaker 4: Before we went away and they delivered it when we
4:12
Speaker 4: were away.
4:13
Speaker 2: Oh, and Frank built it.
4:14
Speaker 4: Nah.
4:15
Speaker 2: Your dad built it?
4:15
Speaker 4: Yeah, Poppy Boom. I think I have the photo actually.
4:18
Speaker 2: I wonder if Frank is secretly like.
4:21
Speaker 1: He's going to be hell jealous.
4:22
Speaker 3: Because it's all from the Wicks. The Wicks are coming
4:26
Speaker 3: in and saving the day.
4:29
Speaker 2: You are a long line of bicycle riders.
4:31
Speaker 4: We are.
4:32
Speaker 2: I believe.
4:32
Speaker 1: Well, you witnessed it in Canberra because I beat you
4:34
Speaker 1: in that balancing thing.
4:37
Speaker 2: I wasn't even trying, Vic. I was barely even.
4:39
Speaker 1: He wanted to do it again. That's April's new bike.
4:42
Speaker 2: That's a boy's bike.
4:43
Speaker 1: No, it's not.
4:44
Speaker 2: That's a boy's bike.
4:44
Speaker 1: No, it's a unisex bike, thank you very much. Just
4:47
Speaker 1: like those baskets should be.
4:50
Speaker 2: So now you're for the basket.
4:51
Speaker 5: Equal rights for the bikes.
4:53
Speaker 4: I'm all about bike equality.
4:56
Speaker 3: Also, just quickly actually, a few people have said, who's
4:59
Speaker 3: that woman talking?
5:02
Speaker 2: And if you're wondering.
5:03
Speaker 4: That's Vic.
5:04
Speaker 1: And Vic, we've been trying to get this episode on
5:07
Speaker 1: the way for ages, but Vic's been dragging her heels.
5:09
Speaker 4: So Vic, say hello to the doters.
5:11
Speaker 5: Hello.
5:12
Speaker 1: I know she's truly held back there when I said
5:14
Speaker 1: you've been dragging your heels.
5:16
Speaker 4: Most of the time. I don't know if she listened.
5:18
Speaker 4: Most of the time.
5:19
Speaker 5: I did, but I was writing notes.
5:20
Speaker 4: Most of the time.
5:21
Speaker 2: We were trying to pay you out.
5:22
Speaker 4: Matt and I are very.
5:23
Speaker 2: Oh, hey, well.
5:25
Speaker 4: We're very prompt, you and I.
5:26
Speaker 1: We're like, we're going to start at this time, but
5:28
Speaker 1: Vic really slows us down.
5:31
Speaker 4: So.
5:32
Speaker 3: Multiple trips out to get coffees, drinks.
5:34
Speaker 5: Oh, my God, that's you guys.
5:35
Speaker 2: She got some eyeliner, eyeshadow.
5:39
Speaker 5: That wasn't from the shops.
5:41
Speaker 2: I don't know.
5:41
Speaker 4: We were meant to start this episode an hour ago.
5:44
Speaker 2: Ash is running a tight schedule today.
5:45
Speaker 4: I'm running a tight schedule around here. So I am
5:47
Speaker 4: type A, you're type B.
5:50
Speaker 3: So Vic, producer Vic is here. That is who you
5:53
Speaker 3: hear often cackling.
5:55
Speaker 2: In the background.
5:55
Speaker 4: Vicky or Victoria or V. Yeah. Depending on.
5:59
Speaker 2: V city.
5:59
Speaker 4: V city. That's pretty good. That's new. Write it down.
6:03
Speaker 4: You're welcome.
6:04
Speaker 2: Great bike. Lovely color. Seats very high on this.
6:08
Speaker 4: She hasn't sat on it yet.
6:09
Speaker 2: Okay.
6:10
Speaker 4: My dad's like, she's seven foot. Yeah. I've got a
6:15
Speaker 4: bike seat extender for you. Why?
6:16
Speaker 2: We should have a competition. Who can learn to ride first,
6:20
Speaker 2: Marley or April?
6:21
Speaker 1: Write that down and i mean it okay that'd be
6:24
Speaker 1: so good do we go to separate camps and then
6:26
Speaker 1: come back for like a who's gonna a bike.
6:29
Speaker 2: Race yes isn't it the bmx too much april and
6:38
Speaker 2: marley both in hospital we're like oh damn.
6:40
Speaker 1: There's a circuit bike track along the beach there but
6:43
Speaker 1: it's like on an oval and you can stand in
6:45
Speaker 1: the middle and watch your kid go right around.
6:47
Speaker 2: I need to, gosh, that is honestly, this is the
6:50
Speaker 2: motivation that I need.
6:50
Speaker 4: Are we talking time trial or are we talking air?
6:53
Speaker 2: She's a grown woman. We're talking about a seven-year-old child.
6:55
Speaker 4: Yeah, but we're. I love you, April.
7:00
Speaker 1: The weaving through, we could set up a bunch of
7:02
Speaker 1: challenges and they go head to head.
7:04
Speaker 2: We can have, yeah, obstacle course.
7:05
Speaker 1: Yeah.
7:06
Speaker 2: And we could put oil on the pavement.
7:08
Speaker 5: Nice. Nice.
7:09
Speaker 4: Bring Louis down.
7:10
Speaker 2: Bring Louis down.
7:11
Speaker 4: Yeah, he's learned to ride.
7:12
Speaker 2: He's just learned, yeah.
7:13
Speaker 1: But he won't be able to bring any of his
7:14
Speaker 1: toys because there's no basket for boys. Yet.
7:16
Speaker 4: Yet. Yes.
7:18
Speaker 5: We should bring one out.
7:19
Speaker 4: But boys are more backpack people.
7:21
Speaker 2: Yeah. Well said. Well said. Not to generalise.
7:25
Speaker 4: Baskets are good.
7:25
Speaker 2: Are you going to do the old towel under the armpits? Yeah.
7:29
Speaker 4: Yeah. I'm going to do the whole thing. Under April's armpits?
7:32
Speaker 5: Yeah.
7:32
Speaker 4: There's going to be good gear.
7:33
Speaker 2: Let me know how you go.
7:34
Speaker 4: I will.
7:34
Speaker 2: Also, you need to put her on a balance bike first.
7:37
Speaker 5: Definitely.
7:38
Speaker 2: Nah.
7:38
Speaker 4: Straight in the deep end.
7:39
Speaker 2: Sure. She's 36.
7:39
Speaker 5: Nearly.
7:39
Speaker 4: 35. Sorry, babe. But yes, bike is incoming. Now.
7:45
Speaker 1: Also, while we're sitting in this little housekeeping session, we
7:48
Speaker 1: had a DM. So I mentioned a while back about
7:52
Speaker 1: linear clocks.
7:54
Speaker 2: Linear being?
7:55
Speaker 4: So circular is the current clock.
7:58
Speaker 1: But with people who are neurodivergent and ADHD, the circular
8:03
Speaker 1: clock doesn't really hold you accountable for your time.
8:07
Speaker 4: Is that the correct way to say that?
8:09
Speaker 5: Yeah, because it doesn't end. It's hard to see when
8:11
Speaker 5: it ends.
8:13
Speaker 2: You need to have the finish line.
8:14
Speaker 4: Yeah.
8:14
Speaker 1: So for me, I see a clock and I'm like,
8:16
Speaker 1: if it goes past the 12, it's going to keep going.
8:19
Speaker 4: So it doesn't really matter.
8:21
Speaker 1: But if I see an ending, I'm like, fuck, I've
8:23
Speaker 1: got to get what I need to do. So anyway,
8:25
Speaker 1: so this particular dota heard me talking about the idea
8:28
Speaker 1: of this and they have created an app. Oh.
8:31
Speaker 4: Okay.
8:32
Speaker 1: A linear clock app, a first version of it, which
8:34
Speaker 1: I'll quickly show you. And we'll leave a link in
8:36
Speaker 1: our show notes for any other dotas to jump on
8:39
Speaker 1: and have a look. But essentially what you do, Matt,
8:42
Speaker 1: is you break your day down.
8:43
Speaker 2: I like that.
8:45
Speaker 1: You break your day down on this app from your
8:48
Speaker 1: morning routine, like anything that needs to be done. From
8:51
Speaker 1: wake up to go to sleep. And the linear clock
8:54
Speaker 1: shows you what part of the day you're at. And
8:56
Speaker 1: you can leave little prompts of like what you usually
8:58
Speaker 1: do during that time of the day. Like for mine,
8:59
Speaker 1: I've got work because this is work. apparently.
9:02
Speaker 2: You've got here masturbate at 12.30.
9:04
Speaker 4: Yeah, that's 24 hours. That's at audibles.
9:09
Speaker 2: At any moment. Oh, no, it's masturbate for the fourth time. Okay.
9:13
Speaker 4: That's the type where it's meant to be 14th.
9:15
Speaker 5: Yeah.
9:16
Speaker 4: 14th time. But it's only- Careful of your testicles, though.
9:19
Speaker 5: Remember what happened.
9:20
Speaker 1: Well, they've actually been stitched to the walls of my testicles,
9:22
Speaker 1: so it's a fucking free-for-all over here.
9:24
Speaker 2: Good to.
9:27
Speaker 5: Know.
9:28
Speaker 4: Don't ask questions you don't want the answer to, Vic.
9:30
Speaker 5: Okay.
9:31
Speaker 2: Can't tell if you're joking or not.
9:33
Speaker 1: Not joking uh but yes so you can go through
9:36
Speaker 1: and you can change it uh it is the first
9:38
Speaker 1: stage of this i provided what i thought was some
9:41
Speaker 1: feedback which is a widget could potentially be built but
9:43
Speaker 1: of course these things cost money take time but i
9:45
Speaker 1: will leave we'll leave a link so currently now i'm
9:48
Speaker 1: in work stage it's got 55 minutes left for 55
9:52
Speaker 1: minutes to get this out the door.
9:53
Speaker 2: Well that's plenty of time You'd think that.
9:56
Speaker 4: You'd think that.
9:57
Speaker 2: I didn't have time to watch that last video.
9:59
Speaker 4: Which video?
9:59
Speaker 2: The one you stopped me watching.
10:00
Speaker 1: Yeah, because I thought the video would turn into.
10:02
Speaker 2: You are right.
10:03
Speaker 4: Vic will slow us down again.
10:04
Speaker 2: Vic is very, she's like an anchor. How dare you.
10:10
Speaker 4: She's like a backpack full of sand.
10:14
Speaker 2: Vic, you're doing great work.
10:15
Speaker 1: I know.
10:16
Speaker 4: We kid.
10:16
Speaker 2: We kid.
10:17
Speaker 1: We kid.
10:17
Speaker 2: We kid.
10:18
Speaker 4: We kid.
10:19
Speaker 1: But.
10:19
Speaker 4: We've just put it.
10:20
Speaker 1: I don't know if you saw in the calendar, there's
10:21
Speaker 1: a performance review meeting for after this.
10:23
Speaker 4: It's a new linear clock.
10:25
Speaker 1: And thank you to that Dota who DMed me.
10:27
Speaker 2: Thank you.
10:28
Speaker 1: Your name eludes me, but that's okay. It doesn't mean
10:30
Speaker 1: I've forgotten about you because here I am talking about it.
10:32
Speaker 3: Ash, I can't tell if I'm meant to read this
10:34
Speaker 3: line or you're meant to read this line.
10:36
Speaker 2: It is a question. Vic, tell me if I'm wrong.
10:39
Speaker 3: The fastest date night you ever had from sit down
10:41
Speaker 3: to paying the bill.
10:41
Speaker 4: Yeah, that's from me to you. That's from so. Oh,
10:43
Speaker 4: for me.
10:44
Speaker 1: That's my question to you because April and I, we
10:47
Speaker 1: just got away for a few days, which we'll talk
10:48
Speaker 1: about in a second.
10:49
Speaker 4: It was a disaster.
10:50
Speaker 1: But we were talking about we obviously went to a
10:53
Speaker 1: lot of nice places to eat and how quickly you're served.
10:57
Speaker 1: And it got us thinking about what our quickest date
10:59
Speaker 1: night was, how it has ever been. So my question
11:01
Speaker 1: to you, and I do know when mine was, but
11:04
Speaker 1: I wanted to ask you.
11:04
Speaker 4: I don't know.
11:05
Speaker 3: To be honest, God, like the last couple of date nights,
11:09
Speaker 3: I cannot even recall when.
11:10
Speaker 1: And I'm talking seated, eaten, paid the bill, you walk
11:15
Speaker 1: out and realize what time it is.
11:15
Speaker 2: Nothing spectacular.
11:17
Speaker 3: I think we've always tried to like, because whenever we've
11:19
Speaker 3: had a date night, we've had someone booked in as
11:22
Speaker 3: a babysitter. So like regardless of how quickly the meal
11:24
Speaker 3: comes out and how quickly we eat it, we like
11:27
Speaker 3: have to make.
11:28
Speaker 2: Sure that we like.
11:29
Speaker 4: Sit in the car and doom scroll.
11:31
Speaker 2: So nothing under an hour.
11:33
Speaker 4: Nothing under an hour.
11:34
Speaker 1: Okay. I'm going to run two different types of date
11:36
Speaker 1: nights behind.
11:37
Speaker 2: Please.
11:37
Speaker 4: Yeah.
11:38
Speaker 1: First one was just a single course. Like it's a,
11:42
Speaker 1: let's go have dinner. Not like a, an occasion, just
11:44
Speaker 1: like a random. And it was a fajita place in Manly.
11:49
Speaker 1: Sat down, ate, paid 20 minutes. Whoa.
11:53
Speaker 2: What did you order?
11:54
Speaker 4: It was a fajita place.
11:55
Speaker 2: Fajitas.
11:55
Speaker 4: Lovely. We used to go there all the time.
11:57
Speaker 2: So they just do fajitas?
11:58
Speaker 4: Yeah.
11:59
Speaker 2: Nothing but fajitas? Yeah, it was great.
12:00
Speaker 4: Do you like fajitas?
12:02
Speaker 2: Do you like fajitas?
12:03
Speaker 4: I love a good fajita.
12:04
Speaker 2: I've never seen you eat a fajita.
12:05
Speaker 4: Oh, I don't eat them in the office.
12:06
Speaker 2: I eat at night. You only eat fajitas on date night?
12:10
Speaker 4: Yeah. I'm going to have fajitas tonight.
12:12
Speaker 1: I'll take a photo for you.
12:13
Speaker 2: Please.
12:13
Speaker 4: Give you the proof. Debunk you saying you've never seen
12:15
Speaker 4: me eat it.
12:16
Speaker 2: Be fajitas.
12:17
Speaker 4: I'll take anything. I'll take it all. One of each.
12:19
Speaker 2: You're not partial to a particular? No, no.
12:21
Speaker 4: I think like as long as it's good, I'll eat
12:23
Speaker 4: any meat.
12:23
Speaker 2: Fajitas for you, Vic?
12:24
Speaker 5: What's the difference between a fajita and a burrito?
12:26
Speaker 4: That's a great. Well, I thought you were going to
12:29
Speaker 4: say taco. Oh. Because that's more of a quote.
12:31
Speaker 2: Burrito is a circular. They're girthy. Fajita is a flat.
12:34
Speaker 1: Yeah, but a taco and a fajita, I don't know.
12:37
Speaker 4: I really don't know.
12:37
Speaker 2: Good question. Interesting.
12:39
Speaker 4: I was going to say it's because you build it yourself.
12:41
Speaker 2: Do what?
12:42
Speaker 1: Yeah, they bring you the fajita, the rams, the. There's
12:45
Speaker 1: also like some sautéed capsicum and onion.
12:48
Speaker 4: Oh, it's like a.
12:49
Speaker 5: Pick and mix.
12:49
Speaker 3: Interesting that if you're going to do Mexican, you just
12:52
Speaker 3: make sure the burrito is included in the mix with
12:54
Speaker 3: the tacos. It's like a Chinese restaurant only doing like
12:57
Speaker 3: honey chicken or like Mongolian lamb.
12:59
Speaker 1: If you only made one dish, think of how accurate
13:03
Speaker 1: that you could be without wasting money.
13:05
Speaker 4: Think about this.
13:06
Speaker 1: If you're like, okay, we're going to do chicken and
13:08
Speaker 1: beef fajitas here. People come in, they eat chicken and
13:10
Speaker 1: beef fajitas. That's on the menu, but then you've got
13:12
Speaker 1: a sides menu where you make your money. where you
13:15
Speaker 1: make your money on the sides and the alcohol and
13:17
Speaker 1: the margaritas. But it's so easy for you to come
13:19
Speaker 1: in because we only have one thing and you know
13:21
Speaker 1: it's good and we're going to give it to you
13:22
Speaker 1: every time, right?
13:26
Speaker 4: That's just your opinion.
13:27
Speaker 1: But it's also nice to not have to think about
13:32
Speaker 1: the choice of what you're going to eat, right? If
13:33
Speaker 1: you're like, we're going for fajitas, that's what we're getting.
13:35
Speaker 1: And it's also as well because it is a mix
13:37
Speaker 1: and match and you're together. It's part of the eating
13:40
Speaker 1: ritual of the fajita.
13:42
Speaker 5: Both of you are dipping into the same plate.
13:44
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's like it would come out, it would have
13:46
Speaker 1: all the ingredients and then a nice little box of...
13:48
Speaker 1: We're getting hung up on details here, guys.
13:51
Speaker 4: Sorry. This is my job usually to get hung up on.
13:53
Speaker 2: No, I'm the questions guy.
13:55
Speaker 4: Okay, now.
13:56
Speaker 2: When was it launched?
13:57
Speaker 4: This was... Well, in Mexico, believe it or not.
14:02
Speaker 1: Now, here's one, an occasion date night where I'm talking
14:06
Speaker 1: like it's like an anniversary and it's like we go
14:08
Speaker 1: somewhere a bit more like not as casual, okay?
14:11
Speaker 2: The quickest?
14:12
Speaker 4: I'm talking.
14:13
Speaker 1: three courses, dessert, out the door. Have a guess how
14:18
Speaker 1: quick we did that.
14:20
Speaker 4: And April can back me up on this.
14:22
Speaker 2: Please don't tell me it's under an hour.
14:23
Speaker 4: 45 minutes. No, what? And April and I love that.
14:28
Speaker 4: Are we not talking? Now it's a competition in our house.
14:32
Speaker 4: It's like, was that close?
14:34
Speaker 1: Because we went to a Mexican restaurant in Canggu. I
14:36
Speaker 1: don't know if you've ever heard of Canggu. It's essentially
14:38
Speaker 1: a suburb in Sydney or Australia now. We went to
14:41
Speaker 1: a Mexican restaurant there. 25 minutes, it was a course
14:44
Speaker 1: and dessert.
14:45
Speaker 5: Most people would be like trying to stretch out their dates.
14:49
Speaker 5: You're just trying to shorten them.
14:51
Speaker 4: Yeah, it's so funny. It's really funny. Trying to get
14:53
Speaker 4: back in. Yeah, I'm.
14:57
Speaker 1: A fucking ace. But 45 minutes, it was three courses
14:59
Speaker 1: and dessert. Anyway, that's my chat.
15:02
Speaker 2: A little update on Lola.
15:04
Speaker 3: She had, Vic, just so you're aware, she had a
15:07
Speaker 3: phantom illness that would kick in 9pm every night, would
15:09
Speaker 3: end up screaming from her room and we couldn't find
15:12
Speaker 3: out what was wrong with her.
15:13
Speaker 4: In her sleep?
15:14
Speaker 2: In her sleep.
15:14
Speaker 3: Well, maybe she was having night terrors. For those playing
15:17
Speaker 3: at home, ear infection.
15:20
Speaker 1: Everything ends up being an ear infection, eh?
15:21
Speaker 3: Yeah.
15:22
Speaker 4: Why is that? He must kick in at.
15:24
Speaker 5: Night or something because Louis had the same thing, same time.
15:26
Speaker 2: Yep. When you're laying down. But she could never, we
15:29
Speaker 2: were like, what's wrong with you? And she was just like, ah!
15:32
Speaker 1: It's like the body receives an infection and then she's like,
15:35
Speaker 1: just send it to the ears.
15:37
Speaker 2: Like she couldn't. She could never tell us that it
15:40
Speaker 2: was her ear. She was like, it's my tummy. It's
15:42
Speaker 2: my legs. It's my knee. We're like, what is wrong
15:44
Speaker 2: with you?
15:45
Speaker 5: I think Louis said it was his jaw. Like, I
15:46
Speaker 5: think it's something in the head.
15:48
Speaker 4: It's confusing.
15:48
Speaker 1: It's because it's so close to the pain, so close
15:51
Speaker 1: to your brain, right, which is your pain receptor. So
15:53
Speaker 1: it's sort of like so close that it's like.
15:56
Speaker 4: My whole head hurts. I haven't had an ear infection since.
15:59
Speaker 1: I was a kid, but, like, I know that they're bad.
16:03
Speaker 4: Poor thing.
16:03
Speaker 2: That illness is now being put to bed.
16:06
Speaker 4: For now.
16:07
Speaker 2: Yeah, although fucking– Didn't know this. Didn't know this.
16:10
Speaker 3: You cannot get eye drops for children under the age
16:13
Speaker 3: of two.
16:13
Speaker 2: Poppy.
16:14
Speaker 3: Yeah.
16:15
Speaker 4: Conjunctivitis?
16:15
Speaker 3: Conjunctivitis. And they just say, oh, you've got to have
16:19
Speaker 3: just these little wipes. And then when it gets bad enough,
16:22
Speaker 3: you then go to the doctors, they give you the antibiotics.
16:24
Speaker 3: So we're just like, but she fucking got like gunk
16:27
Speaker 3: is streaming out the eyes.
16:28
Speaker 4: I know.
16:29
Speaker 1: And you go to sleep and wake up.
16:30
Speaker 4: That's the worst.
16:31
Speaker 2: Oh, my God. Just coming into her room and she's
16:33
Speaker 2: like a mummy that's been stitched. I'm born.
16:38
Speaker 4: I know. Like having it as an adult and you're like, oh,
16:40
Speaker 4: my God, this is it.
16:41
Speaker 2: This is it.
16:44
Speaker 4: And then you're like slowly, like you're like, how strong
16:47
Speaker 4: are my eyelids?
16:48
Speaker 5: Just explain what you're doing there.
16:49
Speaker 1: I'm just trying to, I don't know, closing my eyes.
16:52
Speaker 4: Pretending that I was blind. I'm walking around going, let
16:56
Speaker 4: me feel your face. April, come here.
16:59
Speaker 2: When your kids got conjunctivitis, you're like, oh man, my
17:01
Speaker 2: eyes are itchy. I know.
17:03
Speaker 4: It's like when someone has head lice and you're like.
17:04
Speaker 2: I get like a tiny bit of sleep in my
17:06
Speaker 2: eye and I'm like, this is it.
17:07
Speaker 4: It's the beginning. I'm going down. It's all going to land.
17:10
Speaker 4: Speaking about bedtime.
17:12
Speaker 2: All right.
17:12
Speaker 4: Bedtime stories.
17:13
Speaker 1: I would say two of our favourite football players. Damien Cook, Cookie.
17:17
Speaker 4: Very good guy. Really good guy.
17:18
Speaker 1: And AJ, which is Alex Johnston.
17:21
Speaker 2: Who is currently the leading try scorer in the NRL.
17:23
Speaker 4: Yes.
17:24
Speaker 1: And congratulations to Damien, who's just finished his career in
17:27
Speaker 1: the NRL this year.
17:28
Speaker 2: Oh, he's retiring. Yes, yes.
17:30
Speaker 4: Great career. New South Wales, Australia, the whole bit. And
17:32
Speaker 4: they've written a book. It's called Damien Cook.
17:36
Speaker 2: Very clever.
17:36
Speaker 4: Okay, we'll leave it in our show notes as well.
17:38
Speaker 1: Gee, the show notes are going to be long this episode.
17:40
Speaker 4: But great read. Have you read it?
17:42
Speaker 2: Me?
17:42
Speaker 4: Not yet.
17:43
Speaker 5: What teams are they in?
17:44
Speaker 2: Cookies are for St. George.
17:46
Speaker 1: St. George, but he has a lot of games for
17:48
Speaker 1: the Rabbitohs and AJ has, it's all Rabbitohs, isn't it?
17:51
Speaker 1: He's going to P & G next year or year
17:53
Speaker 1: after next and a stellar bloke.
17:55
Speaker 4: Both of them. So, great. Hey, you over there. Hello. Hey, you.
18:04
Speaker 4: I'm not sure if you saw.
18:05
Speaker 1: We have been influencing some people that we shouldn't be influencing.
18:09
Speaker 1: And I'm not taking the blame for it because I
18:12
Speaker 1: don't control the radios in Vic's house or the podcast platforms.
18:16
Speaker 3: It often alternates between if I'm the swearer or you're
18:20
Speaker 3: the swearer.
18:21
Speaker 4: I know. And in this case.
18:22
Speaker 2: Neither one of us are innocent.
18:24
Speaker 5: What word did you say Ash says?
18:26
Speaker 4: He says fuck. I'm proud.
18:31
Speaker 5: And what does Matt say?
18:32
Speaker 4: Chicken. Chicken?
18:34
Speaker 5: But they're not words you should say, are they? No.
18:37
Speaker 2: No.
18:37
Speaker 4: I love how he's like, what did Ash say? Fuck.
18:43
Speaker 2: That is Vic's beautiful daughter.
18:45
Speaker 4: How old is Lily?
18:46
Speaker 5: She's three and a half.
18:48
Speaker 4: My demographic audience?
18:49
Speaker 5: After you were saying how you wanted to start recording
18:51
Speaker 5: Macy's voice, I was like, oh, I should start doing
18:53
Speaker 5: it with Lily. So I started taking little videos with her.
18:55
Speaker 4: And what did she have to say?
18:56
Speaker 1: Fuck.
18:58
Speaker 5: She was working next to me and I was like,
19:00
Speaker 5: what am I doing? And she's like, you're working. I'm like,
19:02
Speaker 5: what do I do? And she's like.
19:03
Speaker 2: I don't fucking know.
19:05
Speaker 5: She's like tinkering.
19:06
Speaker 1: Correct.
19:07
Speaker 5: But then she goes, for Matt and Ash.
19:09
Speaker 4: And I was like, yeah.
19:11
Speaker 5: And then she goes, Ash says fuck. But Louis also
19:15
Speaker 5: listens and he's like, every time you guys swear, I
19:18
Speaker 5: shouldn't listen to it in the car, but I do.
19:19
Speaker 4: Yeah, you should.
19:20
Speaker 5: And he's like.
19:21
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
19:24
Speaker 5: Every time he's like, I want to say.
19:26
Speaker 4: We were having lunch with some friends.
19:28
Speaker 1: They're like avid listeners and she was like, I've had
19:30
Speaker 1: to stop listening when the kids are in the car.
19:31
Speaker 4: I was like, because you're just outlandish at the moment.
19:35
Speaker 2: We also on YouTube, shout out to the YouTube watchers.
19:39
Speaker 4: The one of you that's watching.
19:40
Speaker 3: Because we're flagged as being not inappropriate. We're flagged as
19:44
Speaker 3: being explicit.
19:46
Speaker 4: Sounds about right.
19:47
Speaker 2: We're not that bad.
19:48
Speaker 5: Fuck.
19:50
Speaker 4: Them. If your kids are in the car while you're listening,
19:55
Speaker 4: I'm fucking sorry. Sorry.
19:59
Speaker 2: We did try at one point.
20:00
Speaker 4: I'm not changing who I am for anybody.
20:02
Speaker 2: The episode, we got five minutes in and we're like,
20:04
Speaker 2: this is awful.
20:05
Speaker 1: I know.
20:06
Speaker 2: Oh, well. Sorry to your children, Vic.
20:07
Speaker 1: That's okay. Look, honestly, they're going to learn those words.
20:11
Speaker 1: They might as well learn them from me.
20:12
Speaker 4: And I'm proud of that.
20:13
Speaker 5: Amen.
20:13
Speaker 3: Tell me what I do here, Ash. You know that
20:16
Speaker 3: there has been a speaking competition at school.
20:19
Speaker 2: Poor Lola. In the morning of her speech, she was like,
20:22
Speaker 2: I don't feel too well. And I'm like, I'm not
20:23
Speaker 2: buying that shit.
20:24
Speaker 4: You're not going to school.
20:26
Speaker 2: No, that's nerves.
20:27
Speaker 5: She's not feeling well.
20:28
Speaker 2: She was really sick. You know when like.
20:32
Speaker 5: It was your infection.
20:33
Speaker 2: You know sometimes when you look at your kids and
20:35
Speaker 2: you're like, oh, yo, you look sick.
20:38
Speaker 1: Yeah.
20:38
Speaker 4: Macy's so. It's usually the pale kids. Macy.
20:41
Speaker 2: I picked up Lola and her eyes were half open.
20:45
Speaker 2: And she's like, daddy, is that you? And I was like, ooh.
20:49
Speaker 2: And then I was like, did you do your speech today?
20:51
Speaker 2: And she's like, yeah. And I said, what did they say?
20:55
Speaker 2: And she goes, I need to speak up louder. i
20:58
Speaker 2: was like oh sorry about that.
21:04
Speaker 1: But like you like you're saying she's not that into
21:06
Speaker 1: that like she'll be into other things right like yeah
21:09
Speaker 1: yeah that's not like i talk for a living now
21:12
Speaker 1: but like i never public i hated public speaking because
21:14
Speaker 1: it was.
21:15
Speaker 3: Just public speaking kids that were the weird ones.
21:17
Speaker 1: You get some palm cards that We're like adult-sized palm cards.
21:21
Speaker 1: So essentially, they might as well give me an A4
21:22
Speaker 1: piece of paper and.
21:23
Speaker 4: I'd be like, good morning, class 1F.
21:26
Speaker 2: Look up, eye contact.
21:27
Speaker 1: For those of you who don't know me, everyone should
21:29
Speaker 1: know me because we're in the same class. My name
21:31
Speaker 1: is Ashton Wicks.
21:33
Speaker 4: And it's like, oh, for God's sake.
21:35
Speaker 1: But because I didn't want to do it, I would
21:37
Speaker 1: just string out the sentences for so long. And furthermore,
21:39
Speaker 1: to the previous sentence that I said in the earlier
21:42
Speaker 1: part of this speech, just to get to the word
21:44
Speaker 1: and time count.
21:45
Speaker 2: Marley was like, what was your favorite subject at school, Dad?
21:47
Speaker 2: And I was like, oh, it's drama. And she was like,
21:48
Speaker 2: what's drama? I was like, well, you just pretend to
21:50
Speaker 2: be someone else. And she was like. That's a lesson?
21:54
Speaker 2: And I was like, yeah.
21:55
Speaker 4: She was like, that's a career. Don't get too good
21:58
Speaker 4: at it though. Breaking news, Vic.
22:02
Speaker 5: Could this be the worst tantrum a parent has ever experienced?
22:06
Speaker 5: A flight has been cancelled and passengers left stranded. because
22:10
Speaker 5: a child refused to sit down and fasten their seat belts.
22:14
Speaker 5: The Canadian flight was headed for the runway when a
22:16
Speaker 5: parent and cabin crew failed to secure the child in
22:19
Speaker 5: their seat with a seat belt. The plane was forced
22:21
Speaker 5: to return to the gate so the parent and child
22:24
Speaker 5: could be removed with their luggage. Unfortunately for the rest
22:27
Speaker 5: of the passengers, they also had to make alternate arrangements.
22:31
Speaker 2: Oh, my gosh.
22:32
Speaker 5: And this was a midnight flight.
22:34
Speaker 4: Oh, my gosh. How old is this child?
22:37
Speaker 5: They don't know exactly how old.
22:39
Speaker 1: It was a toddler.
22:41
Speaker 4: It's a fucking child, guys. Are we for real?
22:44
Speaker 1: Like are we for real that we're letting a child
22:46
Speaker 1: control a whole flyer because someone doesn't want to say,
22:49
Speaker 1: listen here, fucker, sit down and put your seatbelt on.
22:53
Speaker 3: Once again, we don't condone swearing on this podcast.
22:55
Speaker 4: Beat that out.
22:56
Speaker 1: I'll leave it in there.
22:57
Speaker 4: Actually, make that louder. Put it on repeat. Yeah, fuck it,
23:01
Speaker 4: fuck it, fuck it. No, but, like, come on.
23:03
Speaker 5: Yeah, it doesn't say how old the child is.
23:05
Speaker 2: Credit to that kid. Put up one hell of a fight. Yeah,
23:07
Speaker 2: that's a resilient child. Get them into wrestling. That kid's
23:10
Speaker 2: going to be a wrestler.
23:11
Speaker 4: If I'm the parent of that kid, unfortunately, you've failed.
23:16
Speaker 2: I wonder if maybe.
23:17
Speaker 4: I don't want to be that guy.
23:18
Speaker 2: Maybe the captain was just, like, a non-parent, so he was, like.
23:22
Speaker 5: Pulling around.
23:23
Speaker 2: Yeah, but, like, that poor parent.
23:26
Speaker 5: Said the child had been standing in their seat.
23:29
Speaker 4: Yeah, but like this is what I'm saying.
23:30
Speaker 1: We're saying poor parent here, but at what situation, the
23:33
Speaker 1: kid does not listening to that parent. How did that
23:35
Speaker 1: kid get to the point of being that disobedient?
23:38
Speaker 3: Well, surely they would have, it costs a lot of
23:40
Speaker 3: money to like turn those flights around, to like not
23:42
Speaker 3: take off.
23:43
Speaker 1: And then every, so every single person on that flight
23:45
Speaker 1: has to have a terrible time now.
23:47
Speaker 3: But they should have, they should have, I'm sure there
23:49
Speaker 3: would have been people on the flight being like, can
23:50
Speaker 3: I have a crack at strapping them in?
23:52
Speaker 4: Mate, I would have loved to have a crack at that.
23:54
Speaker 5: Give me a go.
23:55
Speaker 4: I would have dad voiced the shit out of that.
23:57
Speaker 2: We love kids on this podcast.
23:58
Speaker 4: I told you that. So Macy, I like, we were
24:02
Speaker 4: in these villas, right? In Bali.
24:04
Speaker 1: And Macy was being real cheeky. And I was like,
24:06
Speaker 1: it was, it was bedtime. She was standing in a car.
24:08
Speaker 4: And I was like, Sit down! Like proper. Scared the
24:12
Speaker 4: shit out of her.
24:13
Speaker 1: The next day Mike was like, I heard you at
24:15
Speaker 1: the other end and even my kids sat down.
24:17
Speaker 2: All the kids in the suburb sat down at once.
24:21
Speaker 4: Oh, yeah. Mate, I just think that's not on.
24:24
Speaker 2: I'm sure they must have tried.
24:26
Speaker 4: I'm sure they must have.
24:28
Speaker 1: They obviously didn't try hard enough. Like I'm getting a
24:30
Speaker 1: kid to sit down one way or another.
24:32
Speaker 5: It reminded me of though, remember how hard it is
24:34
Speaker 5: to get kids in their seatbelts in the car?
24:36
Speaker 2: It's like a cat.
24:38
Speaker 4: Not in my house.
24:41
Speaker 1: Telling you right now i'm not putting up with that
24:43
Speaker 1: i'm not putting up with it and i'll get us.
24:45
Speaker 4: There now my kids put their seatbelts on themselves.
24:48
Speaker 3: There needs to be like ash wicks at every airport
24:50
Speaker 3: so if charles won't sit down they're like we'll.
24:52
Speaker 2: Call the ash yes we'll come on the plane.
24:54
Speaker 1: I get the resilience i don't want to sit down
24:55
Speaker 1: but it shouldn't have to cause that many people problems
24:59
Speaker 1: there's something there that needs to be addressed from the
25:01
Speaker 1: parent sorry.
25:03
Speaker 5: I mean, I think the airline's also to blame.
25:05
Speaker 2: I blame the airline.
25:05
Speaker 4: What do you mean blame? Let's just sit down. If
25:08
Speaker 4: they sat down, it would have fixed the problem. Am
25:10
Speaker 4: I wrong? Why am I the odd one out here?
25:12
Speaker 2: How dare you? How dare you?
25:14
Speaker 4: Shut up.
25:15
Speaker 1: Why am I the odd one out here when it's
25:17
Speaker 1: like the airline did what they had to do?
25:20
Speaker 2: Hypothetical. Let's not get hung up on this. But if
25:23
Speaker 2: the parent was like, I'm getting them sitting down and
25:25
Speaker 2: the captain's like, no, too dangerous. We're turning it around.
25:27
Speaker 2: The parent's like, no, no, no, no.
25:28
Speaker 4: Chill, chill, chill. That's the airline. That's for sure. If
25:32
Speaker 4: you don't give them enough time, but you're talking about
25:34
Speaker 4: a kid that's standing on a seat.
25:36
Speaker 3: I've had that though, where like my kids have like
25:38
Speaker 3: stood up. Depends how long they were standing up for.
25:40
Speaker 4: Yeah.
25:40
Speaker 2: And my kids have been like, fuck the seat belt,
25:41
Speaker 2: I'm doing my own thing.
25:42
Speaker 4: Sit down.
25:43
Speaker 5: So one of the passengers has said the child wasn't
25:45
Speaker 5: being bratty or uncomfortable, but looked scared. He was hiding
25:49
Speaker 5: under the seat. If they got forced into being strapped in,
25:51
Speaker 5: they just kind of slid out underneath. Oh, fuck.
25:54
Speaker 4: That's clever.
25:54
Speaker 5: So he was like a little Houdini.
25:56
Speaker 4: All right. So here we go.
25:58
Speaker 2: I could have used that.
25:59
Speaker 4: Detail because there's a difference. No, there's a difference here.
26:03
Speaker 4: You said the word scared.
26:05
Speaker 2: Okay.
26:05
Speaker 1: If the kid is scared and legitimately scared and there's
26:09
Speaker 1: trauma involved here and turning it around, then I think
26:12
Speaker 1: like without being there, it's hard to be like comment
26:15
Speaker 1: on that.
26:16
Speaker 4: But I don't know.
26:17
Speaker 5: I reckon this parent hasn't prepared their child enough. You
26:21
Speaker 5: know how Jen always says, like, if you prepare them, blah, blah, blah,
26:23
Speaker 5: like they need to know information ahead of time. So
26:26
Speaker 5: if you had said we're going to go on a
26:27
Speaker 5: plane and you're going to wear a seatbelt and you're
26:28
Speaker 5: going to do this and you're going to do that.
26:29
Speaker 2: Actually, imagine being a kid and being like, where the
26:31
Speaker 2: fuck are we? And the plane starts shaking.
26:34
Speaker 4: And you're like, ah!
26:36
Speaker 2: And all of a sudden you look out the window
26:37
Speaker 2: and you're in the sky. You're like, oh, I forgot
26:40
Speaker 2: to tell.
26:40
Speaker 4: But you didn't wake up then, did you?
26:41
Speaker 2: I forgot to tell Billy that we're on a plane.
26:43
Speaker 4: Yeah. Oh, by the way, Billy was sitting on a plane.
26:45
Speaker 1: You know how we walk through an airport, walk past
26:48
Speaker 1: 2,000 planes, and then walked onto this plane?
26:50
Speaker 4: We're on a plane now.
26:51
Speaker 2: I remember that was his first. He'll never fly again.
26:53
Speaker 1: But you said there that person commented saying they weren't bratty. See,
26:57
Speaker 1: this is where my head goes. This kid was being
26:59
Speaker 1: an arsehole. But you're saying they weren't bratty, they were
27:02
Speaker 1: legitimately scared. In that instance, you're right, they're not prepared enough.
27:06
Speaker 4: But come on.
27:07
Speaker 1: Like someone's going to sit the kid down or like
27:11
Speaker 1: why did.
27:11
Speaker 4: Everyone else have to change their truck? I think I'm
27:13
Speaker 4: just getting to it.
27:13
Speaker 3: What was that duct tape photo you showed the guy
27:15
Speaker 3: who got.
27:16
Speaker 4: Apprehended on a flight?
27:17
Speaker 3: It was literally duct tape. You just need more duct
27:20
Speaker 3: tape on planes.
27:20
Speaker 1: I think it might have been a woman that looked
27:22
Speaker 1: like a man. Speaking of aeroplane trips, Matt, I have
27:25
Speaker 1: just returned from what was set out to be quite
27:29
Speaker 1: a nice trip.
27:30
Speaker 4: Quite an obscure trip for us. No kids.
27:33
Speaker 2: Sumatra. The tigers.
27:34
Speaker 4: To Sumatra.
27:35
Speaker 2: Seeing the tigers.
27:36
Speaker 4: On a surf trip. It was only going to be
27:38
Speaker 4: like five days, six days.
27:40
Speaker 2: Quick trip.
27:40
Speaker 4: Lovely quick trip.
27:41
Speaker 2: Little recharge of the batteries.
27:43
Speaker 1: Flew my parents in to take care of the kids
27:45
Speaker 1: and April's dad also to take care of the kids.
27:47
Speaker 1: We set off on our journey. No hiccups to Malaysia first.
27:51
Speaker 1: Get to Malaysia.
27:52
Speaker 2: Love Malaysia.
27:53
Speaker 1: Spend the night in Malaysia. We're flying out to a
27:55
Speaker 1: place called Medan the next day at 8.30.
27:57
Speaker 2: Love Medan.
27:57
Speaker 4: Woke up in the morning. Checked in everything. Flight's delayed
28:00
Speaker 4: 30 minutes.
28:01
Speaker 1: No problems.
28:01
Speaker 2: That's okay.
28:02
Speaker 4: No big deal.
28:02
Speaker 2: No big deal.
28:03
Speaker 4: We did have a connecting flight at the site, but
28:05
Speaker 4: that's not going to hinder us that delay. Then I
28:07
Speaker 4: get delayed till 2.30 in the afternoon.
28:10
Speaker 2: How much more of a delay is that?
28:11
Speaker 4: Like, what, six hours?
28:13
Speaker 2: Oh, okay. A little bit worried there.
28:15
Speaker 4: Would have missed the connecting flight altogether.
28:17
Speaker 1: Okay.
28:18
Speaker 4: So I've gone up.
28:19
Speaker 1: There was another flight that was earlier that wasn't delayed
28:22
Speaker 1: yet that was 10.30. I said, hey, can you chuck
28:24
Speaker 1: us on there? I have a connecting flight. I was
28:26
Speaker 1: the first to the counter. And she said, yeah, there
28:28
Speaker 1: is actually two spots here.
28:30
Speaker 4: I was like, great.
28:31
Speaker 2: Thank heavens.
28:32
Speaker 4: So we sorted that out. That got delayed to a midday.
28:34
Speaker 4: Still not as bad as the first flight. A lot
28:37
Speaker 4: of delays.
28:37
Speaker 1: But I would have missed the connecting flight until I
28:41
Speaker 1: spoke to someone, a friend of mine who owns the
28:43
Speaker 1: surf resort we're going to. He was like, the flight
28:45
Speaker 1: that you're connected to is delayed every time. He said,
28:49
Speaker 1: it's Indonesia. It's always going to be delayed. And it
28:52
Speaker 1: was like, oh, okay. So he's like, there's a good
28:54
Speaker 1: chance you'll make it, but if not, Unfortunately, there's a date.
28:57
Speaker 4: They only fly to this.
28:58
Speaker 1: Island every second day. So I was like, fuck, if
29:00
Speaker 1: I'm going to miss that, what are my other options?
29:03
Speaker 1: I booked a Cessna.
29:04
Speaker 2: You booked it?
29:05
Speaker 4: Yep, 12 seater.
29:06
Speaker 5: Honey bags?
29:07
Speaker 4: No. Wow. I wasn't personally.
29:09
Speaker 5: It was on private flight.
29:14
Speaker 4: My private Cessna. It's held together with duct tape.
29:18
Speaker 2: I love how you had to try to have a
29:19
Speaker 2: jab at Vic before and now she's like, let's dance, motherfucker.
29:22
Speaker 1: I know.
29:23
Speaker 2: Let's go.
29:23
Speaker 4: Because I don't want to be mean. Oh, bullshit. Anyway,
29:27
Speaker 4: so I booked this Cessna. It's a 12-seater that goes
29:29
Speaker 4: the next day. So I was like, sweet, we're covered.
29:31
Speaker 2: The whole plane or two seats? No, two seats.
29:34
Speaker 4: Why would I need a whole plane?
29:35
Speaker 2: You said you booked a Cessna.
29:36
Speaker 4: Yeah, I booked it.
29:37
Speaker 1: That's what the type of planes is i didn't know
29:39
Speaker 1: and it's not through like your typical like you don't
29:40
Speaker 1: have to yell okay anyway so i booked this cessna
29:43
Speaker 1: and then we're going to two seats on a cessna
29:47
Speaker 1: on a 12 seat a cessna okay for god forbid
29:51
Speaker 1: anyway those planes go down real easy don't they just
29:54
Speaker 1: i'll never find out So we're going to get on
29:58
Speaker 1: this first flight.
29:59
Speaker 4: All of a sudden, all the flights to Medan cancelled.
30:04
Speaker 2: Sugar.
30:05
Speaker 4: It's been 30 hours at this point.
30:07
Speaker 2: Where are you at this point?
30:08
Speaker 4: I'm still in KL airport. I haven't left. I was
30:10
Speaker 4: like Tom Hanks in terminal.
30:13
Speaker 1: That's a good airport, though, if you're going to be
30:15
Speaker 1: stuck at KL.
30:16
Speaker 2: Is it?
30:16
Speaker 4: No.
30:17
Speaker 5: Yeah, there's lots to do there. I got stuck at
30:19
Speaker 5: KL airport once, actually.
30:20
Speaker 4: We must have been in a different part of the airport.
30:23
Speaker 2: You're like at the bus stop.
30:24
Speaker 4: There was a Hungry Jacks.
30:26
Speaker 2: You must have been at like Terminal 4. I don't know.
30:28
Speaker 2: Terminal 3, there's like an indoor playground.
30:30
Speaker 4: So we sat there and at this point we're stuck
30:32
Speaker 4: with two options.
30:33
Speaker 2: Trying to stay positive.
30:34
Speaker 1: One option is we stay in KL another night, fly,
30:37
Speaker 1: then stay in Medina night, get to where we're going,
30:39
Speaker 1: be able to spend one day, turn around and come
30:42
Speaker 1: back because The same distance there, this is going to
30:45
Speaker 1: be a big shock, is the same distance back.
30:47
Speaker 2: I don't believe it.
30:48
Speaker 1: So we sort of went, all right, what are we
30:49
Speaker 1: going to do? Let's pivot and detour. So pivoted, detoured,
30:53
Speaker 1: ended up in Canggu, lovely little suburb in Bali that's
30:57
Speaker 1: full of fitness freaks, and matcha, acai, and everyone's talking
31:01
Speaker 1: about protein. So April was in her element.
31:03
Speaker 5: I was about to say, April would love it.
31:04
Speaker 4: April, I've never seen her so happy. I was so disappointed.
31:08
Speaker 4: And she was like, did you say Canggu? So anyway,
31:10
Speaker 4: we moved to Canggu now.
31:12
Speaker 3: You just, can I just say credit to Ash for
31:15
Speaker 3: pivoting with April in mind, because we could have, you
31:19
Speaker 3: could have gone to a place in Bali, which would
31:20
Speaker 3: have been better suited for yourself and surfing.
31:22
Speaker 1: I could have gone anywhere in Indonesia other than north
31:24
Speaker 1: because of this volcano. So the volcano went off the
31:27
Speaker 1: day before.
31:28
Speaker 4: Great. But there was a lot of ash in the sky.
31:30
Speaker 1: It's just not worth it. Ash wasn't in the sky.
31:32
Speaker 1: Ash was still on the ground.
31:33
Speaker 2: There he is.
31:34
Speaker 1: Thank you.
31:35
Speaker 4: So get to Canggu.
31:36
Speaker 1: 36 hours to get to Bali, which is usually a
31:40
Speaker 1: five and a half hour flight.
31:42
Speaker 4: Yeah. Get there. First day, threw my back out. Okay.
31:47
Speaker 2: How'd you do that? Jagging.
31:50
Speaker 4: No, it was.
31:52
Speaker 4: I was surfing.
31:53
Speaker 5: He's winking.
31:54
Speaker 4: Followed by a shagging. No, I wasn't. Guys, come on.
31:56
Speaker 4: This is a family show.
31:57
Speaker 2: It's not, though.
32:00
Speaker 4: Anyway, so that's happened. Then April's got barley belly.
32:04
Speaker 1: Mind you, it took us three days to get to
32:07
Speaker 1: a holiday that we got to spend one day at
32:09
Speaker 1: before I was injured and April was spewing her guts up.
32:12
Speaker 1: So we were pretty much stuck in the hotel room
32:15
Speaker 1: a whole day. Then we had to fly back home
32:18
Speaker 1: the next day. We're like, all right, we had one
32:21
Speaker 1: flight that I used for points on the way home
32:23
Speaker 1: from Jakarta that we kept that was business class.
32:26
Speaker 4: Cause I was like, we're treating ourselves with it. I've
32:28
Speaker 4: earned all these points for Qantas.
32:29
Speaker 1: We're flying all the way to Jakarta to then fly home,
32:32
Speaker 1: to enjoy this.
32:33
Speaker 4: Both flights on the way to the airport canceled.
32:37
Speaker 1: Oh no, wait, one was delayed 24 hours and I
32:39
Speaker 1: had to get back for Canberra for the Canberra thing.
32:42
Speaker 4: So at this point.
32:43
Speaker 1: I've spent four days in airports and one day in
32:47
Speaker 1: a hotel room where April's spewing up every hour and
32:50
Speaker 1: I was flat on my back and one day where
32:52
Speaker 1: we actually had lunch with someone and I got to
32:54
Speaker 1: surf in on this trip all to just land back
32:58
Speaker 1: in Australia on no sleep.
33:01
Speaker 2: I'm sorry you had to go through that.
33:02
Speaker 4: Now, don't get me wrong.
33:04
Speaker 1: I'm very thankful with the position that I've been able
33:06
Speaker 1: to have these holidays.
33:08
Speaker 2: Goes without saying.
33:09
Speaker 1: And I put the spin on it to go to
33:12
Speaker 1: Canggu to try and make it better.
33:13
Speaker 4: But it was just.
33:14
Speaker 1: One of those trips that was destined to fail from
33:17
Speaker 1: the outset, which sucks so bad.
33:19
Speaker 3: At least the bar is low. So the next trip
33:22
Speaker 3: you take is going to be a great one.
33:24
Speaker 4: I've never had so many flight issues.
33:26
Speaker 1: Not one flight. No, one flight that we booked we got,
33:28
Speaker 1: which was the first flight. The rest of them were
33:31
Speaker 1: flights that I booked minutes before getting on it.
33:33
Speaker 4: And it was like, what the fuck is in the air?
33:35
Speaker 4: Do you know what?
33:36
Speaker 2: That Cessna could have been going down. So right now.
33:38
Speaker 4: No, they made it successfully.
33:41
Speaker 2: Damn it.
33:41
Speaker 4: The airline called me. They're like, were you on the plane?
33:45
Speaker 4: Did we lose two passengers before? I was like, no,
33:48
Speaker 4: I cancelled it. And they're like, oh, yeah, okay, yeah.
33:51
Speaker 2: At least you weren't with the kids. That's the silver
33:55
Speaker 2: lining here.
33:56
Speaker 4: And that's the thing.
33:56
Speaker 1: When it was all going down, I thought there's families
33:59
Speaker 1: out here this happens to.
34:00
Speaker 2: Imagine if you were the kids.
34:02
Speaker 4: Dude, I remember one time.
34:03
Speaker 1: April and I before having kids were at the airport
34:05
Speaker 1: flying to my parents' house on the day before Christmas Eve,
34:08
Speaker 1: so the 23rd, and they cancelled our flight.
34:11
Speaker 4: And April was like, oh, how painful. And then I
34:13
Speaker 4: look over. And there's families everywhere.
34:16
Speaker 1: And both April and I in that instant were like, look,
34:19
Speaker 1: it could be so much worse. So in this instance,
34:21
Speaker 1: we were like, this could be so much worse, but
34:25
Speaker 1: it's not.
34:25
Speaker 4: So suck it up. I had a rant. And once
34:28
Speaker 4: I had the rant, I felt better about it.
34:29
Speaker 2: And also like you had sex. Yes, it threw you
34:32
Speaker 2: back out.
34:33
Speaker 4: It threw my back out.
34:34
Speaker 1: And then the rest of the sex trip was ruined
34:36
Speaker 1: by Barley Belly.
34:38
Speaker 5: How did she get barley belly?
34:39
Speaker 4: I don't know. I've never had barley belly.
34:41
Speaker 1: And I feel sorry for her because she's the most
34:43
Speaker 1: conscious about it. I'm out here fucking gargling the water
34:46
Speaker 1: and she's just like goes past like a piece of
34:48
Speaker 1: water and she's like.
34:49
Speaker 5: I saw you were trying to teach her to dive.
34:53
Speaker 4: Yes.
34:53
Speaker 5: I mean, that's a fun part.
34:55
Speaker 2: That's like a great part.
34:57
Speaker 4: I actually wasn't trying to teach her. I walked out
34:58
Speaker 4: of the hotel room and there she was. She was like, well,
35:01
Speaker 4: the pool was empty. I thought it was chance. Poor thing.
35:05
Speaker 4: And it took me so long.
35:05
Speaker 1: To convince her to let me post that video because
35:08
Speaker 1: the first one I actually snuck up on her.
35:10
Speaker 2: Everyone's like, what a rig.
35:11
Speaker 4: Yeah, she looks great.
35:13
Speaker 2: The fans are loving it.
35:13
Speaker 4: She looks unbelievable.
35:14
Speaker 5: She's making us all look bad.
35:15
Speaker 4: Yeah. She does work hard for it though.
35:17
Speaker 1: She deserves it.
35:18
Speaker 2: She deserves it.
35:19
Speaker 1: I don't.
35:21
Speaker 2: Just really quickly, two very quick stories. If I may,
35:23
Speaker 2: before we go.
35:24
Speaker 3: Marley loses a bloody water bottle.
35:26
Speaker 2: Loses everything, to be honest.
35:27
Speaker 4: Yeah.
35:28
Speaker 2: Just like jumpers, hats.
35:29
Speaker 4: Kids are shit. I like that.
35:31
Speaker 3: I'm like, where's your lunchbox? And she's like, how the
35:33
Speaker 3: fuck would I know? And I'm like, you brought it
35:35
Speaker 3: to school. And she's like, what's all the questions, man?
35:37
Speaker 4: Don't accuse me. You packed it.
35:40
Speaker 2: We had library this morning. I was like, where are
35:42
Speaker 2: your library books? And she was like.
35:44
Speaker 4: That's the library.
35:45
Speaker 2: I don't know.
35:46
Speaker 3: She's like, I told you they're on the stairs.
35:48
Speaker 4: And I was like.
35:49
Speaker 2: When? And she's like, I don't know, the other day.
35:51
Speaker 2: And I'm like, just loses everything.
35:54
Speaker 4: She's just useless.
35:55
Speaker 3: So anyway, keeps losing water bottles. I go to the
35:58
Speaker 3: pharmacy to get some medicine.
36:00
Speaker 2: What do I see there?
36:01
Speaker 4: Water bottle.
36:02
Speaker 2: A water bottle. And I think to myself, you know
36:04
Speaker 2: what I'm going to do?
36:05
Speaker 3: I'm going to get Marley a brand new water bottle
36:06
Speaker 3: because she likes to have a water bottle. She loves
36:08
Speaker 3: being in possession of a water bottle, even though.
36:10
Speaker 2: It's not for long.
36:11
Speaker 1: Did you get someone else a water bottle too?
36:13
Speaker 2: The whole family.
36:14
Speaker 4: Oh! Lola. Lola.
36:17
Speaker 2: I bought Marley and Lola.
36:18
Speaker 4: That's great. I thought I was going to catch you
36:20
Speaker 4: out there, but you've got me. You're one step ahead.
36:22
Speaker 2: Can I show you the water bottle?
36:23
Speaker 4: Yes, please.
36:24
Speaker 2: What is the issue with this? Okay.
36:28
Speaker 4: Am I allowed to touch it?
36:29
Speaker 2: Please, touch away.
36:30
Speaker 4: Okay, so it's a pink Tinkerbell fairy looking. It's actually
36:33
Speaker 4: a beautiful little solid.
36:35
Speaker 2: It's a camelback, I believe.
36:37
Speaker 4: Food grade stainless steel.
36:39
Speaker 2: Thank you. Nothing but the best in my family.
36:40
Speaker 4: There's only water in it.
36:41
Speaker 1: You don't have food in there.
36:43
Speaker 4: I suppose you could put soup in there.
36:44
Speaker 2: Smoothie.
36:45
Speaker 4: Smoothie, BPA free, insulated. Now I'm trying to figure out
36:48
Speaker 4: what's wrong with it. It's got a nice handle.
36:49
Speaker 2: Great handle. Little flick top.
36:51
Speaker 4: It's a sipper, not a tipper. Mm-hmm, sipper. Okay.
36:55
Speaker 1: Looking for something that's wrong with it.
36:56
Speaker 2: So I bring this home. I put it on the
36:58
Speaker 2: table and I'm like waiting for, oh, my God, Dad,
37:00
Speaker 2: you're so amazing.
37:01
Speaker 5: This is why you're Dad of the Year.
37:02
Speaker 2: Yeah. And she's like, what is this? And I'm like,
37:05
Speaker 2: it's a new water bottle. And she's like.
37:07
Speaker 1: Oh, no.
37:08
Speaker 2: For God's sake. For God's sake.
37:11
Speaker 4: One job. This guy only has one job and it's
37:14
Speaker 4: to look after me.
37:15
Speaker 2: And I'm like, what's the problem? And she's like, fairies?
37:18
Speaker 3: How old do you think I am?
37:21
Speaker 4: Seven.
37:23
Speaker 2: This is embarrassing. What? And I was like, what do
37:26
Speaker 2: you mean it's embarrassing? I was like, but it's beautiful.
37:28
Speaker 2: It's pink and it's fairies and fairies are different colours.
37:30
Speaker 2: There's a blue one, there's a green one, there's a
37:31
Speaker 2: yellow one. And she's like, I'm not a fucking child.
37:34
Speaker 2: I'm not a baby.
37:34
Speaker 4: You're seven. I don't want to be laughed at at school.
37:37
Speaker 5: Oh, you've gone into embarrassing dad phase. Already?
37:40
Speaker 4: It's too early. so it's too early for you to be.
37:43
Speaker 2: That fairies are out fairies are out she's like you
37:45
Speaker 2: got anything with lipstick.
37:46
Speaker 5: I bet she likes the tooth fairy yes get her.
37:49
Speaker 4: On that it's like if you think fairies are out
37:50
Speaker 4: that means the tooth fairy's not coming anymore that's.
37:52
Speaker 2: Why you didn't win your speech.
37:56
Speaker 1: You need to believe the fairies okay oh my god
38:00
Speaker 1: we're at the stage now where my daughter's like she
38:02
Speaker 1: doesn't want fairies and i'm like shit So she thinks
38:05
Speaker 1: she's growing up too fast.
38:07
Speaker 2: And I was like, you will fucking enjoy these fairies
38:09
Speaker 2: and drink your water.
38:09
Speaker 5: Did Lola like it?
38:11
Speaker 2: Loved it.
38:12
Speaker 4: Now she's got two drink bottles, hasn't she?
38:15
Speaker 1: It's like where I get like, I get that people
38:18
Speaker 1: grow out of phases and stuff like that.
38:20
Speaker 4: She's not like that far past fairy stages. Well, she's not.
38:23
Speaker 4: I wouldn't even think she would be.
38:24
Speaker 2: And I'm like.
38:26
Speaker 4: Oscar loves fairies.
38:27
Speaker 2: Relax, bro. I was like, you're seven. Exactly.
38:29
Speaker 4: What did you want on her?
38:30
Speaker 5: She's very mature.
38:31
Speaker 2: Very mature.
38:31
Speaker 4: She just wants it bare bones, like plain.
38:35
Speaker 2: Yeah, literally.
38:36
Speaker 5: We have plain ones and then they can decorate them
38:37
Speaker 5: with stickers.
38:38
Speaker 2: There you go. That's what I should have done.
38:39
Speaker 4: As long as they're not fairy stickers. Yeah. You should
38:41
Speaker 4: troll her now with fairies.
38:43
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm like.
38:43
Speaker 4: Just fairy stickers everywhere.
38:45
Speaker 1: You know, you're going to pat her on the back
38:47
Speaker 1: and put a fairy sticker on her.
38:47
Speaker 5: Tell her she's offended the fairies.
38:50
Speaker 2: Oh, yeah. Psychological damage.
38:51
Speaker 5: Love it.
38:52
Speaker 4: Let's produce some trauma.
38:53
Speaker 3: Also, really quickly, before we go, before we go, if
38:56
Speaker 3: I may, if I may, Ash, not to put you
38:58
Speaker 3: on the spot here, doesn't Oscar do.
39:00
Speaker 2: Spelling at school?
39:02
Speaker 4: Yeah, I've seen it being part of his homework, so
39:04
Speaker 4: I'm assuming that.
39:05
Speaker 2: It happens.
39:06
Speaker 1: Yeah.
39:07
Speaker 2: We have a spelling list.
39:08
Speaker 4: What's a spelling list?
39:09
Speaker 2: So the kids.
39:10
Speaker 3: On a Tuesday get a list of words, like say
39:14
Speaker 3: 10 words. They have to then kind of learn those
39:16
Speaker 3: 10 words for the week. The following Monday, Tuesday, they
39:19
Speaker 3: do a spelling test. And it's just like, you know,
39:21
Speaker 3: there's nothing, you're not playing for anything. It's just they
39:24
Speaker 3: do a spelling test once a week.
39:25
Speaker 4: That's clever.
39:26
Speaker 3: And quite often, because the kids, Marley often, they lose
39:30
Speaker 3: the spelling sheet. And so the parents in the group
39:32
Speaker 3: are always like, hey, does anyone have this week's spelling words?
39:36
Speaker 1: The pressure that school puts on parents is unbelievable.
39:39
Speaker 2: It's too much.
39:40
Speaker 4: Someone said the other day, like, You don't really.
39:43
Speaker 1: Finish school for like 36 years because you send your
39:46
Speaker 1: kid and you pretty much do all the fun.
39:48
Speaker 2: And we're grade one and I'm already struggling with the homework.
39:50
Speaker 2: God help me when it's high school.
39:51
Speaker 4: Boarding schools sound pretty good.
39:54
Speaker 3: Well, so we've got the spelling words. Tell me, again,
39:58
Speaker 3: put you on the spot. Tell me if you can
40:00
Speaker 3: see what is wrong with this list of words.
40:04
Speaker 1: Soft G, giant, general, fragile, magic, spelling, morphology.
40:09
Speaker 4: What the fuck does that mean?
40:11
Speaker 1: Suffix ship, friendship, membership, citizenship, partnership, super speller, extension, championship, generosusus.
40:19
Speaker 1: Someone spelled something wrong on the spelling sheet.
40:22
Speaker 4: If I'm not mistaken, and let me get this out.
40:24
Speaker 1: If I'm not mistaken, and I'm going to be very
40:26
Speaker 1: accusatory right here. A teacher has got a spelling mistake
40:31
Speaker 1: wrong on the homework spelling sheet.
40:35
Speaker 4: Guilty. We've got one of them. Let's get her.
40:37
Speaker 5: Poor teacher.
40:40
Speaker 2: I looked at it and I was like, I was
40:42
Speaker 2: too nervous to say.
40:43
Speaker 4: Justice for all.
40:44
Speaker 3: I was too nervous to say anything.
40:47
Speaker 2: I was like, ah, in my head, I was like,
40:49
Speaker 2: pretty sure generous is spelt wrong there because I spelt it.
40:52
Speaker 4: How many times did you triple check?
40:53
Speaker 2: And I was like.
40:54
Speaker 4: How many times did you triple check?
40:55
Speaker 2: And I was going to message me like.
40:56
Speaker 3: To my eyes?
40:57
Speaker 2: And then another parent was like, pretty sure generous is
41:00
Speaker 2: spelled wrong.
41:00
Speaker 4: ChatGBT, how to spell generous.
41:02
Speaker 2: I know. And then all the parents were like, let's
41:06
Speaker 2: get the teacher.
41:08
Speaker 4: I'm going, this is justice. This is one for us.
41:10
Speaker 2: We marched to the school with pitchforks being like, death
41:13
Speaker 2: to the teacher.
41:14
Speaker 4: We should get T-shirts that say, this is not how
41:16
Speaker 4: to spell generous.
41:17
Speaker 5: How did they spell it?
41:18
Speaker 2: I'm glad you asked.
41:20
Speaker 4: Spell it out to us, guys. How would you spell generous?
41:23
Speaker 2: You are very smart.
41:26
Speaker 5: G-E-N-E-R-O-U-S.
41:28
Speaker 4: Correct. In the newsreader voice too. So double points.
41:31
Speaker 1: Well done.
41:31
Speaker 2: G-E-N-R-E-R-O-U-S.
41:35
Speaker 4: Genrevers.
41:36
Speaker 2: Typo. Typo. No.
41:37
Speaker 5: No?
41:38
Speaker 4: Don't you dare.
41:39
Speaker 2: Teachers, we got her fired. We got her fired.
41:41
Speaker 4: Now you're going to be like, oh, that was Jen,
41:43
Speaker 4: the rest of you?
41:44
Speaker 3: We all collectively petitioned to get her removed from the school.
41:47
Speaker 3: Might have had something to do with the fact that
41:48
Speaker 3: she didn't pick Miley for the speaking competition.
41:50
Speaker 4: You think it's a Movember petition you're signing, but it's not.
41:55
Speaker 1: That's, yeah, look, what I would do if I was
41:58
Speaker 1: you and I'm this sort of petty is next time
42:00
Speaker 1: you get the opportunity to drop the word Jen in
42:02
Speaker 1: a sentence with this teacher.
42:04
Speaker 5: It's so generous.
42:05
Speaker 4: They say, this is so generous of you. She's like,
42:07
Speaker 4: I think Matt's.
42:08
Speaker 2: Having a stroke.
42:09
Speaker 4: And I'm like, that'll learn you. Yeah, see, this is
42:12
Speaker 4: so generous of you.
42:14
Speaker 1: Should have picked Marley.
42:16
Speaker 2: Yeah. It's like when your parents.
42:18
Speaker 4: How can you trust her to pick a winner of
42:20
Speaker 4: a speech?
42:21
Speaker 2: If she can't even spell.
42:22
Speaker 4: Yeah, it's not very generous of her, is it?
42:25
Speaker 2: Wow. We're making sure these teachers are held accountable. Don't
42:28
Speaker 2: you worry.
42:28
Speaker 4: But also we thank you for all the work you do.
42:30
Speaker 2: Amazing. It's the system.
42:32
Speaker 4: It's the system we're really going after.
42:33
Speaker 2: Backbone of society.
42:34
Speaker 4: It's the system we're really going after.
42:36
Speaker 1: Are we going with typo just to save our kids
42:38
Speaker 1: from being kicked out of their school?
42:39
Speaker 4: Yeah. Okay, cool.
42:41
Speaker 1: Yeah, finally, before we do go, this time is for real.
42:43
Speaker 1: We keep teasing that we're leaving. My wife has.
42:47
Speaker 2: My wife.
42:47
Speaker 5: My wife.
42:49
Speaker 4: My wife.
42:50
Speaker 1: April is, she actually hates it when I just call
42:53
Speaker 1: her my wife.
42:53
Speaker 4: So my wife, my beautiful wife, April.
42:55
Speaker 2: Well said.
42:56
Speaker 1: Her word, my wife. She has started a casual social
43:01
Speaker 1: sports team with a bunch of other mums.
43:04
Speaker 2: Which I think is great.
43:05
Speaker 5: What's the sport?
43:06
Speaker 4: It is touch football.
43:07
Speaker 1: She didn't realise how fast paced it is.
43:10
Speaker 4: So she's working on stamina.
43:12
Speaker 2: Stamina.
43:13
Speaker 4: But also as well, April is so competitive. Unbelievable.
43:17
Speaker 2: She's a good runner.
43:18
Speaker 4: She's a great runner.
43:20
Speaker 1: She had a punch-on with my best friend over beer
43:22
Speaker 1: pong once, and she said to me last night, she said,
43:25
Speaker 1: I'm not competitive. I'm like, mate, I had to pry
43:27
Speaker 1: you off this poor man because you were just beating
43:29
Speaker 1: the shit out of him.
43:30
Speaker 4: But she had her first training last night.
43:32
Speaker 2: How'd she go?
43:33
Speaker 4: Great. A few names were tossed out for the team,
43:36
Speaker 4: and they landed on the Ageless.
43:38
Speaker 1: Athletes, which I think is pretty cool.
43:40
Speaker 4: She didn't want to be vulgar. I was like, be
43:42
Speaker 4: more vulgar. Like, don't touch this.
43:43
Speaker 2: Careful.
43:44
Speaker 5: Yeah.
43:45
Speaker 2: Actually, don't touch it. That's great.
43:46
Speaker 1: Very good.
43:47
Speaker 2: Right? I like that. I was worried for a second.
43:49
Speaker 5: I was like.
43:50
Speaker 4: What was I going to say?
43:51
Speaker 2: I was like, Vic just.
43:52
Speaker 4: Yeah. So she's super excited. Also, she was like really nervous.
43:58
Speaker 1: Then last night she had her first training. They were
44:00
Speaker 1: doing like all the drills and stuff like that. They
44:02
Speaker 1: played against.
44:03
Speaker 4: She scored a try at the end. She came home,
44:04
Speaker 4: she was pumped.
44:05
Speaker 2: She's got to try.
44:06
Speaker 4: She's got to try in the training match.
44:07
Speaker 2: Oh, okay.
44:10
Speaker 4: Whoa.
44:11
Speaker 5: Sorry.
44:11
Speaker 4: Hang on a sec. Let's digest this. Hang on. Vic
44:15
Speaker 4: got real sad. Are you upset that you didn't get
44:17
Speaker 4: invited to the touch team?
44:18
Speaker 1: No.
44:18
Speaker 4: Because you know who's in there?
44:20
Speaker 1: Brooke.
44:21
Speaker 4: Brooke Hammond is part of the team. She'd be so good.
44:24
Speaker 4: She's a gun. She's very good. She is an athlete.
44:26
Speaker 4: She is an athlete. I'm not very good.
44:28
Speaker 5: I would bring the team down.
44:30
Speaker 4: I would say none of them are very good. Ooh.
44:32
Speaker 5: Can I ask, is it a mixed comp?
44:34
Speaker 4: No.
44:35
Speaker 2: Just girls. Just the gals.
44:36
Speaker 5: Because that's dangerous.
44:37
Speaker 4: So we're going to get down there. I may or
44:39
Speaker 4: may not have offered to sponsor the team.
44:41
Speaker 2: What are they asking?
44:42
Speaker 4: Nah, nothing, nothing, nothing. I'll give them some T-shirts. But anyway,
44:45
Speaker 4: I'm going to go to the first game.
44:47
Speaker 2: When is the game?
44:48
Speaker 4: They start next Monday.
44:50
Speaker 1: Oh what a night yeah i mean she's got out
44:54
Speaker 1: of bath and bed routine that's.
44:56
Speaker 3: Great but what was her goal because she said she
44:59
Speaker 3: wanted to challenge herself what did she say again i
45:01
Speaker 3: can't remember i think when i was at your place
45:03
Speaker 3: and she was like i just wanted to like push
45:05
Speaker 3: myself and put myself out of my comfort zone and
45:07
Speaker 3: i'm like that's fucking great it's pretty good it's great
45:09
Speaker 3: because when you get to like your late 30s she's
45:12
Speaker 3: mid 30s sorry i apologize.
45:13
Speaker 1: I tell you who's real proud of her So she
45:18
Speaker 1: got home.
45:19
Speaker 4: The kids were in bed when she got home, but
45:20
Speaker 4: they're awake. They'd just gone into bed.
45:22
Speaker 1: And Oscar's got to see out his door. He's got
45:24
Speaker 1: to go to the bottom end of the bunk and
45:27
Speaker 1: look out.
45:28
Speaker 4: And April sat down and he was like, what number
45:30
Speaker 4: are you? And she's like, we don't have any numbers.
45:34
Speaker 4: Did you score? Did you do this? Who was there?
45:38
Speaker 4: Like just so into it, which is great.
45:40
Speaker 1: Yeah. And she was like, I kept rolling my ankles.
45:43
Speaker 1: So this week I'm going to go and I'll try.
45:45
Speaker 4: And get some content.
45:46
Speaker 2: Paper up. Rolling Wrangles?
45:47
Speaker 4: No, no, no, no, no. She needs boots. She needs
45:49
Speaker 4: proper boots because it's nighttime on grass.
45:51
Speaker 2: She didn't wear boots on the train.
45:52
Speaker 1: Well, it was just the first initial training, and she
45:54
Speaker 1: knew that she needed boots, but she was like, oh,
45:55
Speaker 1: we'll get some. So this week I'm going to go
45:57
Speaker 1: boot fitting with her.
45:57
Speaker 4: Oh, she was like, just wear dad's. I'm like, she
46:00
Speaker 4: looks like a fucking clown. She's like, wear mine. I
46:02
Speaker 4: was like, no one can fit into yours. She didn't
46:04
Speaker 4: quite understand. Guys, that is adorable. So I'm going to
46:06
Speaker 4: update you, see how they're going. So there's a season.
46:09
Speaker 4: We'll keep close tabs on that. I'll give you the-
46:11
Speaker 4: What are they called?
46:11
Speaker 2: The Ageless Beauties?
46:12
Speaker 4: The Ageless- What are they called?
46:14
Speaker 2: The Mervs.
46:15
Speaker 4: No, the Ageless Athletes. The Ageless Athletes.
46:19
Speaker 2: It's hard. It doesn't roll off the tongue. It doesn't.
46:23
Speaker 2: It doesn't. The Ageless Athletes.
46:24
Speaker 5: It makes me think of old people weirdly.
46:26
Speaker 2: Yeah, the geriatrics.
46:27
Speaker 4: The geriatrics.
46:29
Speaker 5: We're so good we're ageless.
46:31
Speaker 4: Yeah, well, I don't know.
46:32
Speaker 2: Yeah.
46:32
Speaker 4: We'll keep you updated.
46:34
Speaker 1: Please.
46:34
Speaker 4: But I'm super proud of her.
46:35
Speaker 2: Super proud. As am I. Well done, April. And if
46:38
Speaker 2: you've enjoyed this episode, we would love it if you
46:40
Speaker 2: gave us a review. Subscribe. Talk to us.
46:44
Speaker 4: Please. Humor us.
46:45
Speaker 2: Say something.
46:46
Speaker 4: Yes, or you can join us on socials. Tutoring Dads, Instagram, TikTok, Facebook.
46:50
Speaker 4: He's thriving. Come and join the chat. And YouTube. Not
46:55
Speaker 4: thriving so much. But hello, one user that listens to
46:57
Speaker 4: us on YouTube.
46:58
Speaker 5: The YouTubers have really come out of the woodwork on
47:00
Speaker 5: the Facebook page.
47:01
Speaker 2: Do you know what?
47:02
Speaker 3: There is nothing that makes people arc up more than
47:05
Speaker 3: the fear of it being taken away.
47:06
Speaker 1: Yeah.
47:07
Speaker 2: Not that it was strategic.
47:08
Speaker 4: We will take this podcast away completely.
47:10
Speaker 2: Unless you leave a review.
47:11
Speaker 4: Unless you review.
47:13
Speaker 2: Well done.
47:14
Speaker 4: Well done. Sign the petition. Next week is Choc, our
47:17
Speaker 4: friend Choc. This is Choc Chats.
47:18
Speaker 1: His name is Jake.
47:19
Speaker 4: So that'll be coming out on Monday, so tune in
47:21
Speaker 4: for that.
47:22
Speaker 2: Love that. And we'll get out of here.
47:24
Speaker 4: I've got a sore throat now from talking.
47:25
Speaker 2: Yeah. Okay, bye.
47:26
Speaker 4: Bye.
47:37
Speaker 3: Two Doting Dads podcast acknowledges the traditional custodians of country
47:41
Speaker 3: throughout Australia and their connections to land, sea and community.
47:45
Speaker 1: We pay our respects to their elders, past and present,
47:47
Speaker 1: and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torres Strait
47:50
Speaker 1: Islander peoples today. This episode was recorded on Gadigal land.