Latest / Dorktales Storytime | Stories for Kids Who Love Big Adventures / Three Billy Goats Buff (Classic) | Three Billy Goats Gruff Retold | Stories for Kids

Transcript

Three Billy Goats Buff (Classic) | Three Billy Goats Gruff Retold | Stories for Kids · Dorktales Storytime | Stories for Kids Who Love Big Adventures

• 0:01
  Jonathan: Hello, Dork Squad.
• 0:02
  Jonathan: I'm Jonathan Cormur, and you're listening to Dork Tales Storytime, the podcast for kids and their pop culture-loving grown-ups.
• 0:14
  Theme Song: It's a beautiful day for a story, adventure, and glory, new friends and old ones, too.
• 0:21
  Theme Song: It's an excellent day to get swept away in a tale, so let us regale you
• 0:34
  Redge: Ninety ninety-one ninety two ninety-three ninety-four
• 0:44
  Jonathan: Oh uh hi Redge.
• 0:45
  Redge: Ninety six Uh
• 0:52
  Jonathan: Whatcha doin'?
• 0:54
  Redge: What ninety-seven?
• 0:56
  Redge: Does ninety-eight?
• 0:58
  Redge: It's ninety-nine look like one hundred
• 1:08
  Jonathan: I mean I guess it looks like you're doing sit-ups.
• 1:11
  Jonathan: Should I rephrase my question?
• 1:15
  Redge: Go ahead, mate.
• 1:17
  Redge: I'm taking a breather.
• 1:22
  Jonathan: Why are you doing sit-ups?
• 1:24
  Redge: Ah, that's a great question, my boy.
• 1:27
  Jonathan: Mm-hmm.
• 1:28
  Redge: Oh, sorry, I I need a splash of water.
• 1:31
  Redge: Ah, I was parched, hmm.
• 1:39
  Jonathan: And I'm patiently awaiting your answer.
• 1:42
  Redge: Oh yes, right, of course.
• 1:43
  Redge: Uh I was working out.
• 1:45
  Jonathan: Working out?
• 1:47
  Redge: Yes.
• 1:47
  Redge: You know that social media website that all my bird friends use to share their opinions in 250 chirps or fewer?
• 1:56
  Jonathan: Oh yeah.
• 1:57
  Jonathan: Uh what was it called again?
• 2:00
  Redge: Hmm, it's on the tip of your tongue, is it?
• 2:03
  Jonathan: Uh Tweeter?
• 2:07
  Redge: Uh close.
• 2:08
  Redge: It's Finchbook.
• 2:10
  Jonathan: Aha.
• 2:11
  Jonathan: Yeah.
• 2:12
  Jonathan: Well, what does that have to do with sit ups?
• 2:16
  Redge: Well, I'm taking part in a workout challenge.
• 2:19
  Redge: Everyone exercises, and the animal who comes out the strongest by the end of the month gets bragging rights.
• 2:28
  Jonathan: Oh wow.
• 2:29
  Jonathan: Uh that sounds like a fun challenge.
• 2:32
  Redge: It is.
• 2:32
  Redge: It
• 2:37
  Jonathan: And you're still doing it.
• 2:40
  Jonathan: Wow, I didn't know you can lift such a large dumbbell.
• 2:44
  Redge: Yes.
• 2:44
  Redge: I can squat twice my body weight.
• 2:49
  Redge: I'm no leafcutter ant, though.
• 2:55
  Jonathan: Well, is it okay if I tell you a story as you uh continue training?
• 3:02
  Redge: Ah of course, mate.
• 3:04
  Redge: I welcome your company.
• 3:08
  Jonathan: Great.
• 3:09
  Redge: But I must warn you, my mind is quite fixated on athletics today.
• 3:14
  Jonathan: Oh?
• 3:15
  Redge: Yes, I failed to mention the challenge started last month, and it ends well tonight.
• 3:23
  Redge: So the only chance I have at winning is remaining focused in these final hours.
• 3:29
  Jonathan: Well, that's quite a coincidence.
• 3:32
  Redge: A coincidence, you say?
• 3:34
  Jonathan: Yeah, your challenge with the other woodland critters goes along perfectly with today's story.
• 3:40
  Redge: Oh, is that so?
• 3:42
  Redge: I adore a good theme.
• 3:44
  Redge: theme parties, theme decor, theme costumes
• 3:50
  Jonathan: And now a theme story.
• 3:52
  Jonathan: Today I'm telling the tale of the Three Billy Goats Gruff.
• 3:58
  Redge: Em what about Buff?
• 4:02
  Jonathan: Ooh, I like it.
• 4:03
  Jonathan: The three Billy Goats Buff
• 4:07
  Redge: Perfection
• 4:09
  Jonathan: Great.
• 4:09
  Jonathan: So here goes.
• 4:11
  Jonathan: Once upon a time, there were three billy goats with the last name Gr uh Buff.
• 4:19
  Jonathan: Let's just say the three goat siblings.
• 4:24
  Redge: Sounds fair.
• 4:25
  Redge: I'll do a push-up for each.
• 4:27
  Redge: One, two, three!
• 4:30
  Jonathan: You better keep going, Redge, if you want to win your Finchbook challenge.
• 4:35
  Redge: Uh Righto.
• 4:36
  Redge: Four five six!
• 4:41
  Jonathan: So the three goat siblings wanted to climb up a hill.
• 4:44
  Redge: Nine ten! That sounds like good exercise.
• 4:48
  Jonathan: And the top of that hill was covered in the sweetest clover they all wanted to eat, so they'd be strong and healthy.
• 4:58
  Redge: It is always important that animals
• 5:01
  Jonathan: and people
• 5:02
  Redge: and people try to stay active and eat what feels right for their bodies, so they're healthy and strong.
• 5:09
  Redge: Which is the point of my challenge.
• 5:12
  Jonathan: I couldn't agree more, Redge.
• 5:14
  Jonathan: So the goat siblings wanted to get to the top of the hill and eat the tastiest clover.
• 5:20
  Redge: Ooh and speaking of snacks, it's snack break time.
• 5:24
  Jonathan: Ah yes.
• 5:26
  Jonathan: Never work out without proper nutrition and hydration.
• 5:29
  Jonathan: Here, eat these almonds I keep in my pocket for moments like this.
• 5:34
  Jonathan: What?
• 5:40
  Jonathan: Pocket almonds always come through in a pinch.
• 5:44
  Redge: And I fear I've pinched my back doing sit-ups.
• 5:51
  Jonathan: Oh, don't push yourself too hard, buddy.
• 5:54
  Jonathan: Just listen to the story.
• 5:56
  Redge: Ooh, alright.
• 5:58
  Redge: I can always pause for snack time.
• 6:02
  Jonathan: So, the three goats set out for the hill.
• 6:05
  Jonathan: But there was one obstacle in their path.
• 6:09
  Redge: Ugh, they didn't begin the challenge on the last day, did they?
• 6:14
  Jonathan: Uh nope, but there was a bridge crossing a river on their path, and under that bridge lived a very hungry troll.
• 6:23
  Redge: Oh no!
• 6:24
  Jonathan: And the goats decided to cross the bridge one by one.
• 6:28
  Jonathan: First up, the youngest of the goat siblings.
• 6:32
  Redge: I certainly hope the troll was friendly.
• 6:36
  Jonathan: More like hungry.
• 6:39
  Redge: Uh-oh.
• 6:41
  Jonathan: Uh-oh is right.
• 6:42
  Jonathan: As the youngest sibling trotted across the bridge, his hooves went trip-trap, trip-trap, trip-trap, and the troll swung his long, sinewy arm across the young goat's path, dragging his stout and bumpy body up, gnashing his terrible teeth, and shouting,
• 7:02
  Troll: Who's that trip trap trotting across my bridge?
• 7:08
  Jonathan: His eyes landed on the youngest goat.
• 7:11
  Troll: Hmm Yum a goat for my supper.
• 7:16
  Troll: I just love succulent goat.
• 7:20
  Troll: I'm going to gobble you up.
• 7:26
  Jonathan: He continued gnashing his teeth.
• 7:29
  Redge: Oh, does he have to continue?
• 7:31
  Redge: That just sounds horrible.
• 7:34
  Jonathan: Well, he was horrible.
• 7:36
  Jonathan: He'd never brushed his teeth.
• 7:38
  Jonathan: He never took a bath, he never did much of anything.
• 7:43
  Redge: Ugh, how could one be so careless?
• 7:46
  Redge: At least I complete challenges
• 7:50
  Jonathan: Right on the final day.
• 7:54
  Jonathan: Anyway, you're much nicer than a bridge troll.
• 7:57
  Jonathan: He ate goats just like that for years, and grew accustomed to snatching them from the bridge and gobbling them up.
• 8:05
  Redge: Ooh I shudder to think about it.
• 8:09
  Jonathan: Ah, but the young goat had a plan.
• 8:12
  First Goat: You don't want to eat me
• 8:16
  Troll: I do.
• 8:17
  Troll: What?
• 8:18
  Troll: I don't?
• 8:21
  First Goat: No you see, I'm going up the hillside with my siblings to eat all the clover so that we can grow strong and healthy.
• 8:36
  First Goat: But I'm just the smallest goatling.
• 8:40
  First Goat: You want someone much more filling than me.
• 8:45
  First Goat: My older brother is next.
• 8:49
  First Goat: Let me pass, and you can have him instead.
• 8:56
  Jonathan: The troll was stunned.
• 8:58
  Jonathan: No goat had ever advocated for their sibling to be eaten.
• 9:02
  Jonathan: The youngster might be crazy, but right.
• 9:06
  Jonathan: He was too hungry for such a small goatling.
• 9:11
  Troll: Oh all right.
• 9:14
  Troll: Be on your way, so I can eat the older goat.
• 9:21
  Troll: I see him coming now.
• 9:26
  Jonathan: And the youngest goat crossed over to the field of tasty clovers.
• 9:31
  Redge: Jonathan, this isn't right to give up a sibling like that.
• 9:36
  Jonathan: Well, Redge, this should come as no surprise to you.
• 9:39
  Jonathan: Just like you haven't been doing your social media challenge for the past four weeks, some things are simply not how they appear.
• 9:47
  Jonathan: Wait for it.
• 9:49
  Redge: Oh all right.
• 9:51
  Jonathan: So along came the second goat crossing the bridge, a bit larger than his sibling.
• 9:57
  Jonathan: Trip trap, trip trap, trip trap and out swung the troll again.
• 10:06
  Troll: Who is trip trapping across my bridge?
• 10:12
  Second Goat: It is I
• 10:14
  Jonathan: said the next goat, bravely.
• 10:17
  Second Goat: I'm going up the hill to munch on the tastiest clover ever, so that I may be healthy, strong, and happy.
• 10:29
  Troll: Oh no you're not.
• 10:31
  Troll: You're bigger than the last one.
• 10:34
  Troll: You'll be my supper as I gobble you up.
• 10:40
  Jonathan: He bellowed as he swung one of his long, sinewy arms to grab the second goat, but the second goat took a step away from his grasp and replied
• 10:51
  Second Goat: Oh no wait just one minute there, troll
• 10:57
  Troll: What?
• 10:59
  Redge: Not very patient, is he?
• 11:01
  Jonathan: Well he's a troll, what do you expect?
• 11:03
  Redge: Good point.
• 11:05
  Jonathan: The second goat continued.
• 11:07
  Second Goat: If you eat me, you won't have nearly enough room in your belly for my sibling who's coming next A much larger and therefore a much greater dinner feast for you.
• 11:25
  Redge: Ooh, he's so clever, playing to the troll's greed like that.
• 11:31
  Jonathan: Exactly.
• 11:32
  Jonathan: These goat siblings are on top of it, and the troll decided to let the second goat go.
• 11:40
  Troll: Okay, you may pass.
• 11:42
  Troll: I can wait for the heartier one to get here.
• 11:46
  Troll: I want a full course supper, like I deserve.
• 11:52
  Jonathan: So the second goat trotted off to the other side of the bridge, and the biggest goat approached.
• 11:59
  Jonathan: Trip, trap, trip, trap went his louder, larger hooves across the wooden boards.
• 12:07
  Jonathan: And again the troll swung himself up to the biggest goat's path, drooling now, for he was very hungry.
• 12:16
  Redge: Well, I no longer am.
• 12:18
  Redge: Those almonds were filling.
• 12:21
  Redge: I'm just on the edge of my seat.
• 12:23
  Jonathan: No exercises while you listen to the end of the story?
• 12:27
  Redge: I've lost all motivation.
• 12:29
  Redge: I'm just riveted by this tale.
• 12:31
  Redge: How will the third goat trick the hungry troll?
• 12:35
  Jonathan: He won't.
• 12:37
  Redge: He won't?
• 12:39
  Jonathan: Nope.
• 12:41
  Redge: So he's eaten?
• 12:43
  Redge: That's disappointing.
• 12:48
  Jonathan: Ah, but Redge, you forget what I said.
• 12:51
  Jonathan: The smaller goats may have needed to trick the troll to escape, but their much larger brother had already grown big enough to face the troll using his strength.
• 13:03
  Redge: Oh my, maybe I should continue with the challenge.
• 13:06
  Redge: That's impressive.
• 13:08
  Redge: Back to push-ups.
• 13:09
  Redge: Where was I?
• 13:10
  Redge: Twenty?
• 13:12
  Redge: Twenty twenty one.
• 13:15
  Jonathan: So the biggest goat squared himself to the troll and began to recite a poem.
• 13:21
  Redge: Twen...
• 13:22
  Redge: I bet the troll did not like that.
• 13:27
  Jonathan: No, the troll was so hungry and angry all at once.
• 13:32
  Redge: You mean hangry, right?
• 13:36
  Jonathan: You're right.
• 13:37
  Jonathan: He was very hangry as he shouted
• 13:41
  Troll: I'm going to gobble you up.
• 13:47
  Jonathan: But the third goat calmly said,
• 13:50
  Third Goat: I have two horns so stout.
• 13:52
  Third Goat: With them I'll thrust you ugly troll out.
• 13:56
  Third Goat: You'll fall from here to the river and stone.
• 14:00
  Third Goat: So you'll leave the bridge crossers all alone.
• 14:06
  Jonathan: And with that, he headbutted the confused troll straight off the bridge.
• 14:12
  Jonathan: So you see, each of the three goats used their own personal strengths to keep each other safe.
• 14:28
  Redge: No fighting or scuffle?
• 14:30
  Redge: Oh, I love that.
• 14:32
  Jonathan: Yes, the third goat trotted up to meet his siblings, and they all munched on sweet clover and laughed at how wisely they defeated the mean troll.
• 14:48
  Redge: I love how strength can come from your body and also your brain.
• 14:53
  Redge: The sibling goats were as clever as they were fit.
• 14:56
  Jonathan: Just like you.
• 14:58
  Jonathan: Don't push yourself too hard to win this challenge, Redge.
• 15:01
  Jonathan: What matters most is you give it your best effort.
• 15:05
  Redge: And next time, I'll try a little sooner than the final day.
• 15:10
  Jonathan: Good idea.
• 15:13
  Redge: Now what's so funny, good sir?
• 15:15
  Jonathan: Uh, nothing.
• 15:17
  Jonathan: Uh I just love how our story was inspired by an animal social media challenge.
• 15:22
  Jonathan: Who would have thought?
• 15:24
  Redge: Hehe, yes.
• 15:25
  Redge: It is uh it is pretty silly.
• 15:31
  Jonathan: Animals on social media.
• 15:33
  Jonathan: Hoo!
• 15:35
  Redge: Oh, it's not just animals on Finchbook and Tweeter.
• 15:38
  Redge: Have you heard about the social media dance craze for clock enthusiasts?
• 15:44
  Redge: You'll never guess what that's called.
• 15:47
  Jonathan: TikTok?
• 15:49
  Redge: How did you know?
• 15:50
  Redge: Hmm.
• 15:51
  Jonathan: Just clever, I guess.
• 15:53
  Jonathan: This has been a Jon in Character production.
• 15:58
  Jonathan: Today's story was written by Amy Thompson, edited by Molly Murphy, and performed by Jonathan Cormur.
• 16:04
  Jonathan: Sound recording and production by Jermaine Hamilton at Hamilton Studios.
• 16:09
  Jonathan: Reach out to us on Instagram or email us at DorkTalestorytime at gmail.com.
• 16:15
  Jonathan: Find links in the show notes or go to dorktalestorytime.com.
• 16:19
  Jonathan: Now, go be the hero of your own story, and we'll see you next once upon a time.
• 16:30
  Theme Song: So universe imagined turns.