Latest / The Manly Catholic: Training Soldiers for Christ / Ep 199 - The Sin Nobody Confesses...And Why It's Destroying Catholic Men
Transcript
- James Caldwell: This is the Manly Catholic, the podcast that calls you out of the shadows and into the fight. Here we forge men into warriors for Christ, husbands, fathers and leaders who refuse to kneel to the modern world's lies. No more passivity, no more excuses, no more lukewarm faith. This is your battle cry, your call to arms. The time for weakness is over. It's time to fight. Welcome to the Manly Catholic. Let's get to work. ⁓ A 2022 study in the Journal for the Scientific Study of Religion found that the typical American prayer lasts about a minute or two, one to two minutes. And men across every religious tradition are statistically the least likely to pray at all. Men who claim to believe that the God of the universe is present, body, blood, soul and divinity in the tabernacle down the street. Men who claim be in the war for their soul, their marriage and their kids. And they're not. giving five minutes a day to their Lord and Savior. That's not just being busy. That's not just, you know, scheduling it in. That's something darker, something older, something that the desert fathers had a name for and it's been destroying men since the fourth century, probably even before that. And today we're going to name it and we're going to do something about it. Hi, this is James Caldwell and welcome back to the Manly Catholic. And this is a sin that nobody wants to talk about. But before we dive in, men, as always, let us begin with the St. Michael prayer. the name of Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit, amen. St. Michael, the Archangel, defend us in battle. Be our protection against the wickedness and snares of the devil. May God rebuke and we humbly pray and do thou prince of the heavenly host by the power of God cast in hell, Satan, and all evil spirits, proud about the world, seeking the ruin of souls. Amen. In the name Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit, amen. Now I want you to think about a scene from Saving Private Ryan. I'm sure many of you have seen it. If not, I will kind of picture it for you here. You already know the example I'm going to be speaking about, but it's about a character named Corporal Upham. He's a translator. He's educated, thoughtful, well-meaning. He clearly cares about the men in his unit. Carries his rifle. He has his ammunition. And there's a scene, one of the most gut-wrenching scenes in the film. Honestly, it's probably one of the more gut-wrenching scenes of all films. where one of his fellow soldiers, man named Melish, Private Melish, is in hand-to-hand combat with a German soldier. And this is a very big battle and Corporal Upham, he was in charge of basically bringing ammunition to their, they were in a defensive position, they were defending themselves and his job was to bring the heavy ammunition to their big machine guns to help defend themselves. And so there's one scene where Private Melish and this German soldier are battling in this. kind of blown out side of the building on the second floor and and up him. He comes to the same building that they're in. He was going to bring ammunition up to to private Melish and he's on the stairs and he hears these two men up above and they're fighting there in hand-to-hand combat. I think both of them had ran out of ammo or their guns had been have been put to the side and they were fighting hand-to-hand combat. And corporate up them very easily. He has his gun. He has a knife. He has everything he needs to defend his fellow soldier, his fellow comrade, his brother in arms. And he just stands on the stairs. He's frozen. He's just listening the whole time. And his brother dies. Private Melish dies. Spoiler alert. Sorry, if you haven't seen it yet, but The German soldier was able to overcome private militia and he's able to to kill him. And he doesn't freeze right because of it lacks information. He doesn't freeze because he lacks the equipment. He freezes because he will not engage. He refuses to fight. That man is what we're talking about today and and that is called sloth. Now he's not you know what most of us are never going to see the field of battle. Thank you for all of our men and women out there who are engaging in war all across the world. But what are we doing? Right? We're freezing. We're scrolling Instagram or YouTube videos, especially men. We're binge watching something. Instead of sitting on the stairs, a little better battle rages on equipped and foreign physically capable and we choose not to move right. We're glued to our screens typically. And then I'm going to ask you something hard right now. When was the last time you were just staying on the stairs frozen? When was the last time you had everything you needed the grace of baptism, the Eucharist and your body, the sacraments available to you and you just didn't engage. You just were frozen and you didn't want to move because you were comfortable. Your marriage needed you and you just checked out. Your kids needed you and you said you were too busy. Your own soul was under attack and you numbed it with whatever was closest. That's the outcome problem. And it is an epidemic in Catholic men right now. Now I want to introduce you all to a word. Write it down if you're somewhere where you can do that. The word is acadia, or A-C-E-D-I-A. ⁓ The Desert Fathers, the monks and hermits of the fourth century who went into the Ujishpun Desert to wage brutal spiritual warfare against their own flesh and of course against the enemy. Their name for every major spiritual attack in Akabia was among the most, not to say the most feared, the most, I guess, most difficult for them to engage. Cassian describes this temptation striking in its most acute form at midday when men should have been most productive, most alive, most engaged. The early monastic tradition connected to what scripture calls the noon day demon. And when it produced was a strange combination of restlessness and paralysis. The monk would stare at the sun, feel like the day would never end, feel like his prayers weren't working, feel like everything he was doing was pointless. In the temptation, the lie was simple. Why bother? What am I doing? Why bother praying today? I prayed yesterday and nothing changed. Why bother being a good husband today? She doesn't appreciate everything I do for her anyways. Why bother trying to lead my kids in the faith? They're going to make their own choices eventually. Why bother? I think many men experience this on a day to day basis as well. Every point in our day we come to and we're like, what are we doing? You know, maybe we start the day off. If we're morning people, we start off with full of optimism and ready for the day. people who are not morning people, they wake up and they're groggy and they need their coffee. And he's like, why? What's the point? Why get out of bed? Acadia as its core is spiritual indifference. It is sorrow at the good. It's usually not outright hatred of God. It's something more, you could say like aversion, a repulsion from divine goodness, a refusal of the will to move towards what is truly good. It's just Not caring enough really to engage. And here's what the church has always known, but our culture has completely lost. Acadia is not primarily about outward behavior. is an interior posture. It is a refusal of the will to meet God where he is. Thomas Aquinas listed it as one of the seven deadly sins. He defined it as sorrow about spiritual good. It's not neutral. It's not passive. It is an active turning away from what is truly good from God because engaging with that good requires something from you. And that's the part that hits men right between the eyes. Sloth is not about being lazy. It's about being unwilling to pay the cost of the fight. Acadia is not a relaxation of effort, but a refusal of joy. A refusal of joy, because the joy that God offers is not cheap. It comes through the cross. It comes through the discipline of prayer, the vulnerability of confession, the sacrifice of leaving your family when you're exhausted. And when a man decides consciously or unconsciously that the cost is too high, Acadia has won. And man, I need to be honest with you. I think Acadia is the signature attack on Catholic men right now, not temptations of the flesh. Those are real, of course, but they're very loud and obnoxious. And I think the culture has even woken up to it. Sexual sins, dangers of pornography. There's so many men out there who are finally realizing this is not good. We know them. And Acadia, think, is quieter. It looks like contentment, being comfortable. It looks like, oh, I'm fine. I'm a nice guy. I show up to mass on Sunday night, check that box. And then you go on cruise control for six more days. Looks like corporal Upham on the stairs. Equipped, I have everything I need, I'm present. I'm not engaged. The TV's on, I'm checking out. Grab my potato chips. I don't wanna do anything else, guys. It's been a long day, I've been working hard, I'm providing for my family physically, but that's basically it. I'm the provider. Isn't that good enough? Man, it's not good enough. I think we all realize that. And that's the thing about Acadia. think most men realize what they need to do, but they refuse to do it because it is hard. It is difficult, especially here out in the West in the United States. We are very comfortable. We have our 68 degree temperature in our car, in our, in our houses. We don't want to engage in something that makes a step outside of her comfort zone. I just completed excess 90. I think most of the men in my group pretty much unanimously had the same experience like, wow, this is hard. This sucks. 90 days. It was grueling. It was a desert. And yes, we slipped and failed, but at least we were trying to engage. coffee and prayer. It's the perfect blend. Mystic Monk Coffee isn't just another cup of coffee. It's handcrafted by the Carmelite monks of Wyoming, roasted with care and infused with prayer. Whether you're starting your morning or fueling your day, Mystic Monk Coffee has you covered. It offers rich, bold flavors that are as divine as their mission. By choosing Mystic Monk, you're not just enjoying exceptional coffee, but you're supporting a community of monks dedicated to their work, to prayer, and to the church. is coffee with a cause. So what are you waiting for? Visit mysticmonkcoffee.com and experience the brew that's fueling faith and flavor. Because let me tell you guys what's actually on the line. Because I don't think we say this enough, plainly enough, really, in the church. Your kids are watching you right now to learn what it means to be a man of faith, especially your sons, if you have boys. They are forming their picture of what God looks like from the way you engage or even don't engage with him. If they see a father who treats faith like a chore, who drifts through his spiritual life on autopilot, who never prays with urgency, who never talks about God like he's real and close and worth fighting for, that image will follow them for decades. Your marriage, it's a spiritual battlefield and the enemy knows this. The final battle, the final frontier, if you will, quote in Star Trek, will be between Satan and the family. He wants to attack your home. He knows your weaknesses there. Again, guys, we've talked about this in our spiritual warfare series. He knows your weaknesses and he will exploit them. He's been at this way longer than we have, and they're patient. And if you're not actively fighting for the sanctification of your marriage, for the holiness of your wife and your children, the enemy will. He will gain ground. The war doesn't pause just because you feel fine. In fact, that's when it gets worse. And here's the thing about Okadia that makes it so deceptive and insidious. It doesn't look like sin, right? It looks like a man who's tired, reasonable, responsible. He's not doing anything wrong, really. He's just not doing the thing that he needs to do. And so it never gets a name, it never gets confessed, it never gets fought against. Man, I want to challenge you to consider something. When was the last time you went to confession and confessed sloth? I went to confession yesterday and I had to confess it. Guilty as charged. Not looking at something you shouldn't. Not losing your temper. Not the obvious things. When did you last walk into the confession and say, father, I've been indifferent. I've been disengaged. I have been like up on the stairs. Maybe don't see that. The priest may not have seen to save him Private Ryan. I've had everything I needed to fight and I just decided to freeze. That confession just might change everything. Because one of the most spiritually dangerous patterns is a slow drift into apathy, which can become gravely serious when the will has deliberately turned away from God's goodness. Because man, that is the thing about Akkadia, about sloth, is that again, on the surface, might seem like, it's not that bad, right? I'm still doing all things. I'm still checking all the boxes, but eventually if it digs into you digs into your roots into your soul, it just makes you not want to engage at all. And then you drift away from God and then and then a lot of the major sins, the big sins can build off of that because if you are indifferent, if you're not engaging, if you're not trying to live a virtuous life, then the other sins are just gonna creep in too. It's like, well, if he's indifferent to that, well, let's just be indifferent to this and let's be indifferent to that. pornography, adultery, lying, stealing, all these things that build off of each other. Because the flip side is, and this is the hope I want to leave you with, if Acadia is a refusal of joy, then the antidote is the decision to receive joy. And that decision doesn't have to be massive, doesn't have to be dramatic, just has to be small. Start with something small. So your challenge for this coming week, and whenever you're listening to this, Pray five intentional minutes with the Creator. not background noise prayers. And I love the Hallow App. It has done so much good. But I feel like, and I sense that so many Catholics and Christians out there, they just push play and they're not actually engaging in prayer with God. And I'm not faulting the Hallow App. Again, I think it has brought a lot of people back to the faith, but it's a starting point, right? It's not the end point. Because I get into it as well. I'll just push play. I'll listen to the readings and I'm like, what do they even talk about? I'll do the rosary. Am I even meditating on the rosary, on the mysteries? Am I just chucking a box? Just sit down. Kneel if you can, go to Adoration Chapel if you can. Close your eyes. Just gave God five intentional, undistracted, silent minutes. Tell him where you've been sitting on the stairs. You frozen. Tell him where you've been avoiding him. Ask him to show you where Acadia has gotten a foothold. Maybe it hasn't. Maybe this is not something you struggle with. I know it's something that I struggle with. You might be surprised though, what God says. And if you want to go further, and I know some of you do, I want you to go to confession before this month is out. Not because you're a terrible person, but because you're a warrior who needs to clean his armor. Because the man who goes into battle with a clear conscience and a clean soul is a different animal entirely from the man who's carrying the weight of unconfessed sin and unexamined drift. Let's be honest, man, sin makes us stupid. I know if I have not been to confession, it's been about a month. Especially with cadia and sloth, I realize I just am not making sound decisions. Of course, you can look into all the other aspects of my life. I get enough sleep and my St. Hydra and eating the right foods. Of course you can look into all that, but I guess it accumulates. Right? It's it's just like a big trash heap that never you never take out the trash, right? It gets stinky. Might just start subtle and small, but eventually get into this big pile of trash. And you came and see through it because it smells so bad and there's so much there. You can't think clearly. Ask a God. What are you holding back from him? Acadia is fought by the patience of faith, by persevering here and now with small and concrete steps leaning on Jesus, rather than waiting to feel ready. Because guys, we're never going to be quote unquote ready, right? We're never gonna be perfect until we get to heaven. but we have to be willing to fight. This whole podcast is about making men ready and willing to fight to engage. Because man, this is truly the only thing that matters in this life. For those of you who are married, those of you who are priests. Who are your spiritual children? Who are your actual children? Who is your spouse? And what are you doing to get them to heaven? To get yourself to heaven. And men remember that we're all in this fight together. We all have our own sins that we struggle with. I know Acadia and sloth is something that I really struggle with. But maybe it's anger. Maybe it's like I mentioned pornography. Maybe it's something else. Men, we are all in this fight together. And if you have a good brotherhood, someone at least one person, hopefully more who you can engage with and talk to these, talk to them about these things, the things that you struggle with. You guys can unite together because we are meant to have a brotherhood. We're meant to stand together against the enemy and say, shall not pass. Man. Thank you so much for spending the time with me today. I don't take it lightly that you've given me a piece of your day. pray that something in this episode has stirred something inside of you. That story is not for me and my wonderful voice. That is indeed the Holy Spirit. Make sure you follow it. If this episode hit you, please share with one man who needs to hear it. Just one. You probably already have a face in your mind, so send it to him. Consider supporting the show over at Buy Me a Coffee. The link is in the show notes. Every dollar helps us reach more men who are ready to fight. And as always, men, until next week, go out there and be a saint. Brothers, thank you for listening. But do not let this end here. If this episode stirred something inside of you, do not keep it to yourself. Share it with a brother who needs to hear it, a man who is tired, a man who's drifting, a man who's under attack and does not even know it. This podcast exists because the battle is real and souls are at stake. If this work has helped you, please support the channel so we can keep fighting. Your support will help ignite the mission to keep us going. We need your help, brothers. I know you will come through for us. Pray for us because we need it as well. The enemy does not rest and neither can we. Now go and live this. Be a saint, not tomorrow, but today. Choose the hard thing, reject sin, get back up. Go to confession, pray your rosary, love your family, and carry your cross without