Latest / Hoppe Radio (Hoppe Hour) With Ryan Hoppe / The Hammerin Hank Show With Henry Ochs & Ryan Hoppe: Episode 57

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The Hammerin Hank Show With Henry Ochs & Ryan Hoppe: Episode 57 · Hoppe Radio (Hoppe Hour) With Ryan Hoppe

• 0:00
  All right, Hammer and Hank, if I hit the music,
• 0:03
  would you be ready to start the show? Goody belly,
• 0:07
  buddy. Buddy belly, whatever it is. All right,
• 0:10
  let's go. You're listening to The Hammer and
• 0:14
  Hank Show with Henry Oaks and Ryan Hoppy. Legend
• 0:30
  on the airwaves free. Autistic kingpin. Cali's
• 0:33
  hard OG. Wild 949. He the voice they need. Doghouse
• 0:37
  days. Laying down the cream. Too legit to quit.
• 0:40
  Heaven and Hank on fire. Mike in hand. Lifeline
• 0:43
  and wire. Radio beast ain't showing no tire.
• 0:47
  Underdog champion. Always going higher. Wild
• 0:50
  like a wolf. Howl at the moon. Airwaves. What
• 0:53
  up Hank? JV. Dynamic trio. I'm great. How are
• 0:58
  you? It's really good. Man, I like to think I'm
• 1:03
  a busy guy, Hank. You are always doing something,
• 1:07
  dude. You are a man around town. Zoom's breaking
• 1:14
  up. What did you say? It's ready. Oh, Lord, we
• 1:18
  might have problems today. Aaron, Hank, what
• 1:20
  is your radio memory of the week? I finally met
• 1:25
  Taylor from Star 113 yesterday at the AT &T store
• 1:30
  in Castro Valley. Did you go out to the event?
• 1:34
  Yes, I did. Did Smurfette drive you? Yes, she
• 1:40
  did. And I'm getting a new iPhone. You're getting
• 1:43
  a new iPhone? Which iPhone? iPhone 17 Pro Max.
• 1:48
  Wow! Baller, Aubrey! Dude, how excited are you?
• 1:54
  Really excited, buddy. You're going to be able
• 1:56
  to Snapchat and send pictures to all the hot
• 1:58
  women with the latest camera. Look at you. You
• 2:02
  have no idea what I'm talking about. Hammer and
• 2:05
  Hank. What else is? Do you have any other radio
• 2:08
  memories of the week? That's it. That's it? Out
• 2:14
  of all your time on the doghouse, you have nothing
• 2:17
  to remember upon? I remember one doghouse memory.
• 2:22
  Tell me. When he brought me in the studio for
• 2:29
  birthday cake. That was on my birthday in 2004.
• 2:33
  How old were you then? I was, I think I was 38.
• 2:39
  How old are you right now? 59. I'll be 59. Oh
• 2:44
  my Lord, you're so young. You were 37. 37, yep.
• 2:50
  Do you ever, when you're at church, do you ever
• 2:54
  pray to JV? Yes. What do you pray to JV about
• 2:59
  up in heaven? I pray that seeing that Graham
• 3:05
  and Jess do a good job on their morning show,
• 3:07
  the JV show on Wild Night for Night. They seem
• 3:12
  to be doing pretty well. I mean, I think it's
• 3:14
  time to name it Graham and Selena in the morning,
• 3:16
  but what do I know? I'm on vacation this coming
• 3:20
  week. You're what? I'm on vacation this coming
• 3:24
  week. Oh, no. I was so worried. They're going
• 3:25
  to go to Napa Valley. I have a headache. If I
• 3:28
  hit the music, are you ready for the jokes? Yep.
• 3:59
  All right, Hank, today we have two different
• 4:00
  types of jokes. We have regular jokes, which
• 4:03
  are always... And these are all jokes. Yes, go
• 4:05
  with the regular jokes first as I drink this
• 4:08
  Pepsi. Mm -hmm. Why do I spend an hour picking
• 4:13
  out an outfit? Why do you what? Spend an hour
• 4:19
  picking out an outfit? Because you're a woman?
• 4:22
  Why? Because first impressions are important,
• 4:26
  and second impressions are usually shirtless.
• 4:32
  Why did she tell me to come over after 10 o 'clock
• 4:36
  at night? Because apparently, that's when all
• 4:40
  the important conversations happen. Nice! What
• 4:46
  did I say? I'm just gonna stay for one drink?
• 4:50
  When? Because I enjoy being hilariously wrong.
• 4:57
  That happens to me. Why did I buy candles for
• 5:01
  my apartment? Why? Because as it says, romance
• 5:06
  like poutine, I have my life together. Me too,
• 5:10
  bud. Welcome to the club. Why did I smile when
• 5:14
  I tripped over my own feet? Why? Because confidence
• 5:19
  is attractive and apparently so is surviving
• 5:23
  embarrassment. That is a deep joke right there.
• 5:27
  What I have, what I love, what I love a little
• 5:34
  tension. Why? Because the world, they won't.
• 5:42
  Day is such as better than the day old. I have
• 5:47
  no idea what you just said, but it was still
• 5:48
  funnier than Carlos Mencia. Why did I practice
• 5:52
  what I was going to say before the date? Why?
• 5:59
  Because my brain turns into mashed potatoes around
• 6:03
  distracted people. Why did I bring my lucky shirt?
• 6:09
  Why? Because if my personality fails, maybe Con...
• 6:14
  Maybe what? Are you okay? Oh no, we're having
• 6:24
  technical difficulties. This is not what I wanted
• 6:26
  to say. Are you okay, Hank? Hank? Oh, goody,
• 6:33
  goody gumdrops. We have no fucking audio. Let
• 6:37
  me see what's going on. 856. You're what? You
• 6:43
  back? All right. Next joke. This show's a mess.
• 6:52
  I don't know why. Nice. All right. Give me the
• 7:03
  baseball jokes. Why did the baseball part bring
• 7:08
  a pencil to the game? Why? In case we need to
• 7:12
  draw a lock. Why did the Cinderella so bad at
• 7:20
  baseball? I don't know. Why? Because she kept
• 7:24
  running away from the ball. Why did the baseball
• 7:30
  team go to the bank? Why? To get their picture.
• 7:36
  Why did the baseball player sit on a pancake?
• 7:39
  Why? Because he was a better batter. No, that's
• 7:44
  not bad. Why do baseball teams always look cool?
• 7:47
  Why? Because they're full of fans. Why did the
• 7:53
  baseball player get arrested? Why? Because he
• 7:57
  stole second base. Oh, nice. Why did the baseball
• 8:01
  player... Why was the baseball player a good
• 8:05
  musician? Why? Because he had a perfect pitch.
• 8:10
  Why did the baseball player bring a string to
• 8:13
  the game? Why? So he could tie the score. Nice.
• 8:19
  Why don't baseball players join the circus? Why
• 8:22
  don't baseball players join the circus? Because
• 8:25
  they already know how to judge jugglers. Nice.
• 8:30
  And finally, why was the baseball coach yelling
• 8:33
  at the vending machine? Why? Because it wouldn't
• 8:37
  give him a fair shake. No, it's not bad. And
• 8:43
  that's it for the baseball jokes. All right,
• 8:45
  Hammer and Hank. What's the key to getting social
• 8:48
  media interaction? When I post our show, we get
• 8:51
  10 likes. You post the national anthem, you get
• 8:54
  a million and a half likes. What's the key? I
• 8:57
  know. How do we do it? What do we do? Because
• 9:00
  we need to promote the show more. Yeah. Also,
• 9:05
  the Woody show helping you out. It's kind of
• 9:06
  ideal. 550 likes. Good for you. Yeah. Here is
• 9:12
  your national anthem. You won't be able to hear
• 9:13
  it. And it's wrong. Good job, Hammer and Hank.
• 10:29
  Thank you, buddy. Man, I'm so proud of you. I'm
• 10:35
  like a proud brother. You're doing it. Thank
• 10:36
  you, buddy. You're doing it. Let's see. Fire
• 10:40
  at the music. Are you ready for music trivia?
• 10:45
  Yes. One sec. Turn on the show with Henry and
• 10:54
  Ryan. Hot trivia questions. Yeah, no lying. Got
• 10:57
  my mind sharp like a blade that's flying. They
• 10:59
  asking those questions, got my brain frying.
• 11:01
  Hammer and Hank's got the mic up high. Pop hits
• 11:04
  playing to the end of the sky. Gotta keep it
• 11:07
  real, can't let it slide. Answers in my head,
• 11:10
  can't let them hide. Pop trivia. Yeah, we bringing
• 11:13
  the heat. Get your knowledge up, take a sneak.
• 11:16
  Playing those hits right. What do you got? One
• 11:19
  question this week. Only one? Jesus Christ. What
• 11:22
  is it? Who had the BK record? Quit playing games
• 11:28
  with my heart back in 1997. Hank, I actually
• 11:33
  know this one. I'm so excited. I might need to
• 11:37
  phone a friend. Are you ready for me to be correct?
• 11:41
  Are you ready? Yes. Backstreet Boys! Hell yeah!
• 11:49
  Hank, who's singing the song It's Gonna Be May?
• 11:55
  I don't know. NSYNC! NSYNC, that's right. I said,
• 12:00
  I confused you because I was trying to be funny.
• 12:02
  That was a failed. This is why you're the guy
• 12:05
  going on the big time radio shows and I'm the
• 12:08
  guy and damn, you're a legend. You don't need
• 12:10
  my humor. Don't even know what I'm saying. Hammer
• 12:13
  and Hank, what music do you think I'm playing
• 12:18
  right now? Church music. You know me so well.
• 12:23
  Hammer and Hank. What's going on in church? We're
• 12:29
  going to have a substitute speaker this week
• 12:30
  because Pastor John is going to visit some of
• 12:36
  his relatives on vacation. Is he going to a brothel?
• 12:39
  I'm kidding. So what are you learning this week
• 12:41
  in church? Not yet. What are you learning? What
• 12:46
  book are you on? What's Chivas doing? We're on
• 12:49
  1 Peter. How's that going? Extremely good. That's
• 12:56
  interesting stuff. Mm -hmm. What have you been
• 12:59
  praying to God this week about? Mm -hmm. About
• 13:02
  my radio career. Hank. Hank. You're driving me
• 13:08
  nuts. You're on to Woody. You're on to Woody.
• 13:10
  Let me. My upcoming performance at the San Jose
• 13:14
  Giants game on July 21st. Well, you kill every
• 13:17
  national anthem. Mm -hmm. So it's kind of a hammering.
• 13:20
  Thank you. You're on the Woody Show, the show
• 13:23
  that won't talk to me. You are on the JV Show.
• 13:28
  You're on KCRH. You're on Hot 97 .7. You're on
• 13:33
  the Hammer and Hank Show. You've been on Happy
• 13:35
  Hour. You were on the Dog House with JV and Elvis.
• 13:38
  You were on Manic House Morning Madhouse. You
• 13:41
  do have a radio career. You made it. Well, buddy,
• 13:45
  looks like I made it. Ha, ha, ha, ha. I wish
• 13:49
  we had video here. You're so adorable. Hank,
• 13:52
  many comments were left on your national anthem.
• 13:56
  We had some fire emojis from Jason McMurray,
• 13:59
  a .k .a. Mattis. We had people saying they're
• 14:03
  proud of you and that that was a great national
• 14:05
  anthem. So keep up the good work, Hank. Thank
• 14:09
  you, buddy. What is your summer event ideas?
• 14:13
  Going to the Alameda County Fair. What are you
• 14:16
  going to do there? Maybe eat some food. That
• 14:22
  sounds good. What are you going to eat? Maybe
• 14:25
  some hot dogs. Oh, yeah. What did you say? Sing
• 14:31
  the hot dog song for me. Hot dogs. Armor hot
• 14:38
  dogs. Is that from Flintstones or something?
• 14:42
  It was an actual armor hot dog commercial. I
• 14:45
  probably was, you know, on my dad's balls at
• 14:49
  that moment. I don't think I was alive for that.
• 14:50
  That's what I love about our generation crossing
• 14:53
  is that we have different references. Mm -hmm.
• 14:56
  I hammer an egg. Are you ready for a prick of
• 14:59
  the egg? Yes. Let me hit the music. Mm. Straight
• 15:09
  out the dim lit house. What do you have? Maybe
• 15:36
  the prick of the week this week is also Those
• 15:41
  who don't believe in me. Who? Hank. Hank. Who
• 15:46
  doesn't believe in you? You have the Woody show.
• 15:49
  On Mark Apple. I want to throw an apple against
• 15:54
  his head. Who cares about him? I know you haven't
• 15:56
  heard of him. And I know a lot of people on radio.
• 16:00
  He was the one running back in 2008. Look what
• 16:04
  happened then. They're irrelevant. Sorry. You
• 16:10
  see those 12 plus ratings? I know. I'm good.
• 16:14
  Come on, Hank. I have plenty of haters. I have
• 16:17
  people tell me all the time that I suck, that
• 16:20
  I'm never going to make it. And look, I'm doing
• 16:22
  a show with Hammer and Hank. I'm doing a show
• 16:24
  too. I'm Hammer and Hank. Are there any other
• 16:29
  pricks in the news or the week? Dang it. Yeah,
• 16:33
  screw Mark Apple. Hey, the douche. Hank, I want
• 16:37
  to hit the buddy of the week music, okay? All
• 16:39
  right, buddy. A little more pies and the vibes.
• 17:11
  Who's your buddy of the week? Everyone in the
• 17:15
  Medessa Roasters organization. They're good people
• 17:19
  over there. They're extremely good people. Invite
• 17:22
  me to see the National Anthem at their game on
• 17:25
  Wednesday night. Yeah. Which the Medessa Roasters
• 17:27
  humiliated. Good to humiliate. 16 to 3. 16 to
• 17:38
  3? Yeah. You brought the positive mojo, Hank.
• 17:42
  Hey, can you believe when I yell that my cat
• 17:44
  is sleeping on the bed very happy? Yep. Love
• 17:49
  can make you happy. Hank, sing me a song right
• 17:54
  now. Let's dance. Sing me the first song that
• 17:58
  comes to your mind. Hank. Love can make you happy.
• 18:07
  Go on. I don't pay attention to lyrics that much.
• 18:12
  You're the best. Hank! Anything else on your
• 18:16
  mind? You okay? Are you okay? You've been coughing
• 18:23
  a lot today. Are you okay? Somebody set off fireworks
• 18:26
  in our neighborhood last night. Did the exhaust
• 18:29
  hurt your throat? Sort of. I'm sorry, bud. Were
• 18:34
  you outside? And there's mice in our house also.
• 18:36
  And what about the house? There's mice in our
• 18:39
  house also. Oh, that's not good. You got to get
• 18:41
  a cat. Mm -hmm. I can't, Marley. I can't because
• 18:45
  my dog Marty hates cats. Ha, ha, ha. I don't
• 18:50
  think my sweet Luna would like Marley either.
• 18:52
  It's always the animal that doesn't like other
• 18:54
  animals. Hammer and Hank, can Marley kill the
• 18:57
  mouse? Nope. We tried anti -mouse way, but they
• 19:05
  kept coming back. You gotta get that work done.
• 19:08
  Hammer and Hank, anything else? That's it. Alright,
• 19:12
  one second. Hammer and Hank. We've been recording
• 19:15
  for 19 minutes and 15 seconds. Does it feel like
• 19:18
  it's been 20 minutes? Yep. Okay. I was not expecting
• 19:22
  that answer. Henry and Hank, any final thoughts
• 19:26
  for episode 57? Never, never give up. Always
• 19:32
  stay focused on your goals. I got to shout out
• 19:35
  to all my buddies out there who supported my
• 19:38
  nationalism, and I'll talk to you real soon.
• 19:40
  Peace in your hood. Bye, Hank! Peace is here,
• 19:44
  buddy. Peace is here, buddy. Peace is here, buddy.
• 20:16
  Always running the glow. But all good things
• 20:18
  gotta let the curtain go slow. On the dial. Spitting
• 20:21
  truth with his unique grind. Thoughts intertwined
• 20:24
  like graffiti on the line. Ryan on the mic. Henry's
• 20:26
  rhythm divine. They the blueprint. Every beat
• 20:29
  they design. Static in the speakers where the
• 20:32
  laughter used to ride. Hank led the show with
• 20:34
  that beautiful pride. Autism didn't stop him.
• 20:37
  Nod amplified. Hammering Hank forever immortalized.
• 20:40
  Farewell Hammering Hank. Gotta close up the show.
• 20:43
  Legend in the booth where the vibe Warrior always
• 20:47
  running the glow. But all good things gotta let
• 20:50
  the curtain go slow. Radio go, never ghost. He
• 20:53
  a host with the sauce. Henry Oaks and Ryan Hart.
• 20:55
  Lightning never lost. Puzzle piece crown. Man,
• 20:58
  this dude was the boss. City missed the voice.
• 21:00
  That's the ultimate cost. Farewell Hammer and
• 21:33
  Hank Gotta close up the show Legend in the booth
• 21:36
  Where the vibes used to flow Autism warrior Always
• 21:39
  running the glow But all good things Gotta let
• 21:41
  the curtain go slow Radio gate never goes He
• 21:54
  a host with the sauce Harry Oaks and Ryan Harp
• 21:56
  Lightning never lost Puzzle piece crown Man this
• 21:59
  dude was the boss City missed the voice That's
• 22:02
  the ultimate cause. Award -winning and nationally
• 22:26
  syndicated Hoppy Hour podcast. but I'm not bragging.
• 22:30
  It's a mix of a 2000s, 1990s morning show in
• 22:34
  a podcast format. You never know what I might
• 22:37
  talk about. One minute I could be talking about
• 22:39
  the latest with the NFL side chicks, and the
• 22:42
  very next second I could be playing an unknown
• 22:45
  song from the 2000s. My show is an in -studio
• 22:49
  circus for the age group of 18 to 34, even though
• 22:53
  we have 70 -year -olds that listen. For more
• 22:56
  info, if you want to be a sponsor, a friend,
• 22:59
  and no, not a drinking sponsor, a sponsor of
• 23:02
  the show of Hoppy Hour, go to ridethewave .media
• 23:06
  is the website, and ryanhoppyradio at gmail .com.
• 23:11
  Once again, this is Ryan Hoppy of the Hoppy Hour
• 23:15
  podcast, and let's do some business. What's up?
• 23:18
  Ryan Hoppe here, and I want to tell you about
• 23:20
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