Latest / Unshakeable with Human Design - A Human Design For Business Podcast / 477: Navigating Life Transitions with Human Design
Transcript
- 0:11Nicole Laino: Come here to become an unshakable human and build an unshakable business according to your human design.
- 0:17Nicole Laino: I'm your host, Nicole Laino.
- 0:21Nicole Laino: Hello and welcome to Unshakable with Human Design.
- 0:24Nicole Laino: I'm your host, Nicole Laino and it's just you and me today and we are going to talk about how to navigate big life transitions with human design.
- 0:35Nicole Laino: How this tool can really ground you in a process, especially when things feel shaky and not just for you.
- 0:43Nicole Laino: This is something that I use with my clients all the time.
- 0:46Nicole Laino: I mean, I'm always guiding them through their human design.
- 0:50Nicole Laino: I'm using human design to ground them in their own process.
- 0:56Nicole Laino: Here's the beauty of this.
- 0:57Nicole Laino: So being able to listen to somebody and hear their story, hear what they are going through.
- 1:04Nicole Laino: Sometimes we don't have the answer for how this is all going to get better.
- 1:09Nicole Laino: When there's a death, when you are moving and you're in between the old place and the new place and things feel chaotic and sometimes there's not a whole lot that a coach can do.
- 1:25Nicole Laino: We can hold space, of course.
- 1:27Nicole Laino: But what is so amazing about human design and what I want to explore and kind of go through with you here is it allows you to have a process that belongs to the person you're talking to and ground them in that.
- 1:41Nicole Laino: And what's so life changing about that is they learn something about themselves through this trauma, challenging transition, this moment.
- 1:53Nicole Laino: They actually are learning to embody their process because they're in it.
- 1:58Nicole Laino: You're not talking about it.
- 1:59Nicole Laino: You're not just telling them like, so you're a generator.
- 2:01Nicole Laino: You're tying it to the things that they are going through.
- 2:05Nicole Laino: You are anchoring it to their experience and you're guiding them through how they can.
- 2:10Nicole Laino: While maybe not fix everything, sometimes it doesn't.
- 2:15Nicole Laino: We can't fix grief.
- 2:17Nicole Laino: We have to go through grief.
- 2:18Nicole Laino: But sometimes by giving people their process through human design or calling out specific aspects from their chart of where this might be showing up for them and why and how it's showing up for them, being able to guide them through in a way that feels both comforting and useful for them, but also it's very supportive for you as the coach.
- 2:44Nicole Laino: Before I found Human design and I coached people for quite a long time and I had nlp, I was an NLP practitioner and I was an EFT practitioner and I had taken life coaching courses, I had done quite a bit of study, and I've since gone through somatic trainings and astrology trainings.
- 3:05Nicole Laino: Like, I have a lot of expertise and I have a lot of training in how to guide people and how to read people and all of that.
- 3:12Nicole Laino: But it wasn't until I found human design that I really felt like I knew how to listen to somebody.
- 3:19Nicole Laino: I knew what I was listening for.
- 3:21Nicole Laino: And I could start to find the areas of their own process where maybe I could offer them something useful that they could use to shift them back into something that felt more supportive, that felt more them, that felt comforting or helpful in that moment.
- 3:39Nicole Laino: So that's what we're going to explore in the episode today.
- 3:42Nicole Laino: Now, if you are interested in coaching, if you are interested in guiding people with human design, or if you're just interested in going super deep with this for your own process and your own family and your own group of people that you have around you in your circle, I have been asked about this for many years now.
- 3:58Nicole Laino: I have been asked if I had a certification for human design.
- 4:02Nicole Laino: And my answer was always no, because I, quite frankly, didn't want to do it.
- 4:08Nicole Laino: My sacral said no.
- 4:09Nicole Laino: For a very long time I would get a hard no.
- 4:12Nicole Laino: And I think it was because I was occupied with other things.
- 4:17Nicole Laino: I was excited about other things, my energy was going other places and it was choosing other things besides a certification.
- 4:25Nicole Laino: And then people started asking me about a year ago, they started asking me, are you going to do a certification?
- 4:30Nicole Laino: And I started to get a different answer.
- 4:32Nicole Laino: So we are finally launching it.
- 4:35Nicole Laino: And I took a lot of time in figuring out how do I want to teach this?
- 4:38Nicole Laino: Because I don't want it to be like every other human design certification because I had to take one multiple certifications of all different types.
- 4:46Nicole Laino: And I've taken more human design courses than I can count.
- 4:50Nicole Laino: Literally.
- 4:50Nicole Laino: I have no idea how many hours I have spent, but it's thousands at this point.
- 4:56Nicole Laino: And I've done so much study and I didn't want people to go through that.
- 4:58Nicole Laino: I didn't want my certification to be one that left a bunch of holes in people's process that they didn't know what to do with it.
- 5:04Nicole Laino: I had no interest in putting out another certification.
- 5:09Nicole Laino: That's just, here's what a manifesting generator is.
- 5:11Nicole Laino: Here's what a defined G center means.
- 5:14Nicole Laino: Here's what it means for this.
- 5:16Nicole Laino: I wasn't interested in passing along more definitions.
- 5:19Nicole Laino: There are enough books on human design podcasts on Human design, other people's certifications where they give you that did not feel good to me.
- 5:28Nicole Laino: I needed to give you something that was a truly practical solution.
- 5:32Nicole Laino: So that's what we've done.
- 5:34Nicole Laino: My particular method, we're calling it integrated human design because it's truly how you integrate this into your current coaching practice, your therapy practice, your current work, or if you are somebody who is in aspiring coach, an aspiring guide, because that is what you will be when you get out of the certification.
- 5:53Nicole Laino: If you are somebody who's an aspiring guide to guide people toward their purpose and to make money at this and to use this in your own business and maybe build a business around human design, it is built for you so you can actually get people results, so that you can actually know what to do with the human design knowledge we are giving you.
- 6:14Nicole Laino: While there are definitions, of course you need to know what things mean.
- 6:17Nicole Laino: But all of our practical sessions, which we have 12 weeks together, so you will have live sessions with me personally where we are getting you active with the knowledge that you are actively using it.
- 6:32Nicole Laino: I'm not teaching in those sessions.
- 6:33Nicole Laino: We are only working together and workshopping this.
- 6:37Nicole Laino: So when you finish the 12 weeks, you're like, I know what to do with this.
- 6:41Nicole Laino: I know what my genius is with this.
- 6:43Nicole Laino: I know that I can start taking clients tomorrow and feel confident that I can guide them.
- 6:49Nicole Laino: I can give a badass reading, or I could guide people to their purpose.
- 6:56Nicole Laino: That is what we are going to do together over the 12 weeks.
- 6:58Nicole Laino: If you're interested in that DM ME certification on Instagram, I'm @nicolefficial or go to nicolelaino.com certification and you can check out all of the details there.
- 7:09Nicole Laino: Okay, thank you, guys.
- 7:11Nicole Laino: All right, let's dive into this.
- 7:13Nicole Laino: So navigating big transitions.
- 7:15Nicole Laino: I do this pretty much every week Inside Business by Design.
- 7:19Nicole Laino: Some client comes in with a major life transition that they're going through something that feels difficult to them or something where they feel like they are between places, whether it's between offers in their business or, like I said, moving house.
- 7:34Nicole Laino: This is what life is, right?
- 7:36Nicole Laino: Life is full of transitions.
- 7:39Nicole Laino: But when we try to give people advice on a transitional moment, again, we're giving them when we're giving them our advice.
- 7:46Nicole Laino: So I had a client recently, she's moving, so.
- 7:50Nicole Laino: And she's sort of between decisions of where she's going to move to and she's waiting on a job offer and trying to figure out, waiting to see if they are going to continue her in the process of interviewing for this job she really wants, and so she doesn't know where she's moving, but she's got to be out of her apartment.
- 8:07Nicole Laino: She has all of these things going on and yet she can do nothing about them.
- 8:12Nicole Laino: She's sort of in a holding pattern.
- 8:14Nicole Laino: So she's transitioning in her life in this way.
- 8:17Nicole Laino: Moving house, changing positions at work, or potentially taking a new position and just shifting all of these things, which can be very destabilizing.
- 8:28Nicole Laino: What helps me is to know one.
- 8:31Nicole Laino: I know this person, of course, we've been working together for several months.
- 8:35Nicole Laino: But to look at her chart and to know what parts of her maybe feel destabilized by this, she's a one lion.
- 8:42Nicole Laino: It's like, oh, well, one lines really do wanna know.
- 8:45Nicole Laino: They wanna have some sort of foundation.
- 8:47Nicole Laino: They want to have concrete, solidified things that feel certain.
- 8:53Nicole Laino: They want to feel certain.
- 8:54Nicole Laino: And that's what the one line is all about.
- 8:57Nicole Laino: She's also a four line, also really likes a foundation.
- 9:01Nicole Laino: It can help me to know these things and I can help to guide her as a 14 through this.
- 9:07Nicole Laino: But the thing that was standing out to me here was it's what happens in this process because I can watch people no matter what type they are.
- 9:17Nicole Laino: But we'll use generators as an example.
- 9:20Nicole Laino: Generators and manifesting generators.
- 9:22Nicole Laino: What will happen during a process like this when the sacral has nothing to move on, when there is nothing to do?
- 9:29Nicole Laino: That's exciting.
- 9:30Nicole Laino: I was saying to her, I'm like, you know, nobody likes to pack.
- 9:33Nicole Laino: There's nobody who likes to pack for a move.
- 9:36Nicole Laino: There's nobody who wants to go through their dead loved ones things.
- 9:41Nicole Laino: These are not fun things for us to do.
- 9:44Nicole Laino: So it might feel like your sacral is kind of dormant here, which is why it's important to go out and do things that do feel good, that have nothing to do with this, so that you can come back and take care of what needs to be taken care of.
- 9:57Nicole Laino: But it's also when your sacral doesn't have anything to engage with, you're going to go right back to your mind.
- 10:02Nicole Laino: That's when the thoughts are going to start swirling.
- 10:05Nicole Laino: That's when you are going to start trying to figure things out.
- 10:09Nicole Laino: And that takes you further out of the process, which makes you feel worse, which makes you feel like you have to figure it out or you have to have a resolution to something, or you sit there without moving and it just ends up feeling like you're neither here nor there.
- 10:26Nicole Laino: It feels, I don't like the word hopeless, but that's the one that's coming to me.
- 10:30Nicole Laino: Because you just feel like you're helpless.
- 10:32Nicole Laino: There's nothing that you can do to fix it.
- 10:34Nicole Laino: And you so desperately want to.
- 10:37Nicole Laino: So the answer for a sacral is go engage with life.
- 10:41Nicole Laino: Go shift to something that does feel good to you.
- 10:45Nicole Laino: Your energy wants to go somewhere, unless it's tired.
- 10:49Nicole Laino: If it's not tired, then it wants to go somewhere, just not where you are trying to force it to go.
- 10:54Nicole Laino: And sitting there and trying to mentally figure things out and try to, you know, you can look at homes in different cities, you can do that, but you can't move on any of them.
- 11:06Nicole Laino: So you don't want to do too much of that.
- 11:08Nicole Laino: You do what feels good in the moment.
- 11:10Nicole Laino: And if nothing feels good, it's because maybe what you are engaged with isn't right for you in that moment.
- 11:18Nicole Laino: It's important for me always to bring sacrals back to the moment.
- 11:25Nicole Laino: And that because something doesn't feel good now doesn't mean that it won't feel good forever.
- 11:31Nicole Laino: We have to remember that because that's how it feels.
- 11:33Nicole Laino: We lose all sense of that when we go into the mind.
- 11:36Nicole Laino: Because the mind thinks, what if it's like this forever?
- 11:40Nicole Laino: What if we never feel excited again?
- 11:41Nicole Laino: That's what the mind does.
- 11:43Nicole Laino: Those are beliefs.
- 11:44Nicole Laino: That's the part of you that is scared that everything won't work out.
- 11:48Nicole Laino: None of that is your truth.
- 11:50Nicole Laino: None of that is your design.
- 11:52Nicole Laino: So do you see how being able to guide somebody back to their process immediately creates some calm?
- 11:59Nicole Laino: They start to feel it.
- 11:59Nicole Laino: I watch it in people.
- 12:01Nicole Laino: And there was a difference between when I coached without human design.
- 12:05Nicole Laino: And I mean, it's a world of difference between when I coached before human design and coaching now with human design and having done that for several years now.
- 12:14Nicole Laino: The difference is I used to give advice.
- 12:17Nicole Laino: And when you give advice and you're just breaking down and having people reframe thoughts, that's helpful.
- 12:25Nicole Laino: But what you find is they kind of always come back to those same thoughts.
- 12:28Nicole Laino: They're coming back with the same problem over and over again because you're not helping them fix really why they are stuck because you can't see it.
- 12:38Nicole Laino: You're looking at it from a mind level.
- 12:41Nicole Laino: And we need to just take the mind out of it completely.
- 12:43Nicole Laino: And human design is the only tool that I have found that actually does that.
- 12:48Nicole Laino: Which is why it is so amazing to offer this during big life transitions because it gives people permission to Follow their process because there's part of them that's saying they shouldn't do it like that.
- 13:03Nicole Laino: It shouldn't be that easy.
- 13:04Nicole Laino: I shouldn't be having fun when there's so much to do, right?
- 13:09Nicole Laino: A projector might say, I shouldn't rest when there's so much to do.
- 13:14Nicole Laino: I shouldn't go have coffee with a friend when there's so much to do.
- 13:18Nicole Laino: A manifester might be like, I shouldn't show up the way that I want to.
- 13:23Nicole Laino: I shouldn't rest because there's so much to do.
- 13:27Nicole Laino: Or I shouldn't be so pissed that I'm doing something, you know, I should want to be a part of this.
- 13:34Nicole Laino: And they just don't.
- 13:35Nicole Laino: They don't want to be.
- 13:36Nicole Laino: They might feel guilty.
- 13:37Nicole Laino: My advice to them might be, well, maybe you should hire someone to help you pack up.
- 13:42Nicole Laino: Or if they are grieving, they may really need to either tap out.
- 13:48Nicole Laino: They have to do whatever they want to do.
- 13:51Nicole Laino: That's the funny thing about manifestors.
- 13:53Nicole Laino: I'm never telling them what to do.
- 13:55Nicole Laino: I have to be very careful about that.
- 13:56Nicole Laino: You never tell a manifesto what to do.
- 13:58Nicole Laino: The choice has to be theirs.
- 14:00Nicole Laino: But you can ask great questions to help them arrive at the thing that makes them feel like they can follow what they truly know and to wait until they have that clarity.
- 14:12Nicole Laino: I think in my coaching career previously, it was all about, well, how do I get them moving, how do I get them producing, how do I get them to be successful?
- 14:20Nicole Laino: So it was very much that, go, go, how do we reframe this so you could still be productive?
- 14:26Nicole Laino: I labeled myself a productivity coach in the beginning because that really was in my design.
- 14:32Nicole Laino: I'm very much geared toward productivity.
- 14:35Nicole Laino: My astrology and my human design point a lot in that direction.
- 14:39Nicole Laino: But that's me.
- 14:41Nicole Laino: That's not the people that I work with.
- 14:42Nicole Laino: Not everybody is here to push for productivity at all costs.
- 14:46Nicole Laino: And what I learned through human design is that pushing for productivity does not make some people productive.
- 14:52Nicole Laino: It has a counter productive effect on them.
- 14:58Nicole Laino: End on a relationship because they feel like you just pushed them and pushed them.
- 15:03Nicole Laino: And either they feel like they let you down or they feel like they let themselves down and like something is wrong with them.
- 15:11Nicole Laino: And the truth is that they are just different.
- 15:13Nicole Laino: Nothing is wrong with them.
- 15:15Nicole Laino: They are just different.
- 15:17Nicole Laino: And we don't honor the difference in traditional forms of coaching.
- 15:22Nicole Laino: We honor the output.
- 15:24Nicole Laino: And with human design, it's process first.
- 15:27Nicole Laino: Because if you can get somebody to trust their process, if you could get Somebody, you know, when I work with people for a year inside Business by design, they're transformed because they had a year if they were showing up and actually doing the work with me.
- 15:44Nicole Laino: They have been coached consistently for a year, me guiding them back to their process whenever they lost their way.
- 15:51Nicole Laino: I just saw somebody post about this, talking about the lack of integrity in the coaching industry.
- 15:57Nicole Laino: And one of the things they were calling out was how they watched coaches and mentors intentionally confuse people so that they would stay with them and manipulating them, which I can't think of a worse thing to do.
- 16:11Nicole Laino: I don't think that most people do that on purpose, but I do think that some coaches are not all that upset when people renew and renew because those people feel like they need them.
- 16:24Nicole Laino: I am very excited when clients tell me that they are going to go off and do their own thing because they feel like they are prepared.
- 16:33Nicole Laino: Now.
- 16:34Nicole Laino: I'm also very excited when they say they're going to renew because they enjoy working with me and they know there's more work to do.
- 16:41Nicole Laino: So they want to continue to grow.
- 16:44Nicole Laino: That I love.
- 16:45Nicole Laino: But that's a choice.
- 16:46Nicole Laino: That's not them being like, oh, my God, what am I going to do without this?
- 16:50Nicole Laino: I'm scared.
- 16:52Nicole Laino: No.
- 16:52Nicole Laino: I want them to fly and leave the nest.
- 16:54Nicole Laino: And human design actually allows you to pass on a process to people that creates that ability.
- 17:00Nicole Laino: If they're understanding of their process and they've got it in their body at that point and they know what to do.
- 17:07Nicole Laino: You've given them the tools.
- 17:09Nicole Laino: You've shown them how to use them.
- 17:10Nicole Laino: You've shown them when to pull out which tool.
- 17:13Nicole Laino: You've shown them how to see into their own process so they can start to coach themselves and guide themselves.
- 17:19Nicole Laino: Because you brought them back into their body.
- 17:21Nicole Laino: That's a gift of lifelong transformation, not only for them, but for the people around them.
- 17:29Nicole Laino: It's an amazing gift.
- 17:32Nicole Laino: So if you're interested in that, if you're interested in maybe taking the next step in your human design journey, and you really want to immerse yourself in it, the Integrated Human Design Guide certification is open right now.
- 17:46Nicole Laino: We start on June 1st.
- 17:47Nicole Laino: This is a cohort.
- 17:48Nicole Laino: You won't be able to join late because we're going to be on a week by week schedule and it will close doors.
- 17:54Nicole Laino: So we will close doors on May 29th.
- 17:57Nicole Laino: So if you would like to get more information on that DM me certification on Instagram, I'm icoleno official or go to nicolelaino.com certification and of course, it's all linked up in the show notes for you.
- 18:09Nicole Laino: But thank you so much for being here with me.
- 18:11Nicole Laino: I appreciate you.
- 18:12Nicole Laino: And remember, in order to have an unshakeable business, you must first become an unshakeable human.
- 18:17Nicole Laino: So thanks for letting us help you become unshakable with human Design.
- 18:20Nicole Laino: We'll see you next time.
- 18:22Nicole Laino: If you love this episode and you're a fan of the show, please show us the love on itunes, Spotify, or wherever you're listening to the show and leave us a review.
- 18:28Nicole Laino: And if you'd like to connect with other entrepreneurs on their human design journey, join our free Facebook community, Human Design for Entrepreneurs.
- 18:35Nicole Laino: Go to nicolelaino Me Podcastlinks to join the group.
- 18:40Nicole Laino: Book a human design reading with me or access our free human design resources.
- 18:44Nicole Laino: We'll see you there.