Latest / Relationship Talk Thursday / How To Leverage Your Differences As Strengths
Transcript
- 0:00Speaker 1: Inspiration thirteen ninety music of Power and Praise.
- 0:02Speaker 2: It's Sonia Blaky.
- 0:03Speaker 1: It's February, Love Month, the perfect month to bring back
- 0:07Speaker 1: relationship Talk Thursday. Man, this is our third weekend and
- 0:10Speaker 1: it's been phenomenal.
- 0:11Speaker 3: The response has been incredible.
- 0:14Speaker 1: And Pastor Jamone and Pastor Erica, how y'all feeling about
- 0:18Speaker 1: relationship talk Thursday?
- 0:19Speaker 2: You get a good response? Yes, I'm so excited.
- 0:22Speaker 3: So happy. So thank you so much for that.
- 0:25Speaker 4: Thank you creating space for us to talk about relationships,
- 0:28Speaker 4: families and healthy marriages.
- 0:30Speaker 3: It's been a blast. Yeah.
- 0:32Speaker 5: Well, you guys got the content, right, You got the content,
- 0:35Speaker 5: you're bringing it and so you know, these segments have
- 0:38Speaker 5: been focused on your book, Power Couples, and we want
- 0:40Speaker 5: to continue that at least through the month of February.
- 0:43Speaker 1: So today we want to talk about leveraging your differences
- 0:46Speaker 1: as strengths you said we have. We need to move
- 0:50Speaker 1: from the me versus you to we versus It's right.
- 0:54Speaker 2: What does that mean?
- 0:55Speaker 3: We're on the same team.
- 0:56Speaker 2: Yeah, we are not against each other's We're on the.
- 0:59Speaker 4: Set and whatever is coming against us is coming against us.
- 1:05Speaker 4: As I said in one of the earliest segments, this month.
- 1:08Speaker 4: You know, even if you have to physically change your
- 1:10Speaker 4: position and your posture so you can paint a picture
- 1:13Speaker 4: that this thing is coming at our marriage. Well, the
- 1:17Speaker 4: thing between us, it's a thing with us against it.
- 1:21Speaker 4: So we stay on the same side and we approach
- 1:25Speaker 4: or attack the intruder into our marriage, our love, our relationship,
- 1:31Speaker 4: and we deal with it as such. We are on
- 1:34Speaker 4: the same team. It's not me, it's not you, it's we,
- 1:36Speaker 4: and it's it.
- 1:38Speaker 5: Yeah, And I think that couples don't realize that. And
- 1:41Speaker 5: when you brought that out that it was so important
- 1:43Speaker 5: to realize that if we're dealing with whatever it is,
- 1:45Speaker 5: if it's if it's uh, you know, finances, and you
- 1:50Speaker 5: might be the person that is manifesting that we are
- 1:53Speaker 5: not doing. You are the vessel, and I need to
- 1:58Speaker 5: switch you from being the vessel and to bring you
- 2:01Speaker 5: back on this side and tell you, Okay, you brought
- 2:05Speaker 5: this in our relationship or right here, but right now,
- 2:08Speaker 5: sins is here is not you that I'm looking at.
- 2:11Speaker 5: I'm looking at it because it's coming for us. And
- 2:13Speaker 5: that's what we have to take our focus off of
- 2:16Speaker 5: each other and put each other on the same team.
- 2:19Speaker 2: We're the same nation. We're the same team.
- 2:21Speaker 5: And if we're the same team, then we're fighting against
- 2:23Speaker 5: it together and not you fighting me, right.
- 2:26Speaker 4: And I think we have to get back to biblical
- 2:28Speaker 4: roles and identity in term of marriage versus cultural identities.
- 2:33Speaker 2: Right.
- 2:34Speaker 4: So God has an idea about what the role and
- 2:36Speaker 4: the responsibility of a man is a leader, to be
- 2:39Speaker 4: a priest, a provider or protector, and then a woman
- 2:42Speaker 4: is to be tech to be a helper, the nurturer,
- 2:44Speaker 4: the developer. She is that that has that ability to
- 2:49Speaker 4: ten times you put her extra my life.
- 2:53Speaker 3: She's a multiplier.
- 2:55Speaker 4: Whatever you give to a woman, she's going to multiply
- 2:57Speaker 4: and give her anything.
- 2:59Speaker 3: That you don't want multiply. Right.
- 3:01Speaker 4: A man that has the seed, he's the progenitor, so
- 3:04Speaker 4: he's the source comes from him. And I think we
- 3:06Speaker 4: get biblical ideas around that and lot back into that,
- 3:10Speaker 4: then we don't embrace these cultural identities that said.
- 3:13Speaker 3: Because you're a man, you gotta do this, that and
- 3:15Speaker 3: the other.
- 3:16Speaker 4: I mean, I think that that you you want to
- 3:18Speaker 4: lock into your marriage about what is it that you
- 3:20Speaker 4: have expectations about, communicate them clearly? What I have expectations about,
- 3:25Speaker 4: communicating clearly My wife wanted her expectations, which you once
- 3:31Speaker 4: I put in the cabbage can, I ain't taking it out.
- 3:34Speaker 4: That's her expectation. So you know, I got two sons.
- 3:37Speaker 4: They take out the trash because my whole life I
- 3:39Speaker 4: had to take out the trash. I ain't get maried
- 3:40Speaker 4: to take out the trash. Ain't gonna be So so
- 3:43Speaker 4: we go into those ideas, and we need to learn
- 3:46Speaker 4: what your expectation is of this marriage so I can
- 3:49Speaker 4: meet and exceed that expectation.
- 3:50Speaker 1: Are you always learning each other's expectations. Expectations change over time.
- 3:55Speaker 5: Yes, expectations changed because your life changes exactly. So for instance,
- 4:01Speaker 5: I was I was working, I was a principal, I
- 4:04Speaker 5: was a teacher, and so my day started early in
- 4:07Speaker 5: the morning and it ended late at night. I mean
- 4:09Speaker 5: not late at night, but in the in the evening.
- 4:10Speaker 5: So my husband had to take our daughter to daycare,
- 4:14Speaker 5: so he had to sit and he had to do
- 4:15Speaker 5: her hair and all that other kind of stuff you
- 4:17Speaker 5: don't want you.
- 4:18Speaker 3: Know, the whole memoir about it.
- 4:21Speaker 4: Lessons I learned from my daughter because she taught me
- 4:23Speaker 4: something every day that was so.
- 4:25Speaker 5: Yes, your roles and your expectation changes, so That means
- 4:29Speaker 5: that his expectation for me changed because I was working
- 4:32Speaker 5: outside of the house. Now that I'm gonna stay at home,
- 4:35Speaker 5: there's a there's a difference expectation than.
- 4:38Speaker 2: It was when I was working a nine to five.
- 4:40Speaker 5: So all of these If your expectations aren't changing, then
- 4:44Speaker 5: I would really yeah, and your marriage is stagnant.
- 4:48Speaker 4: And you are evolving. That's why we said keep dating.
- 4:50Speaker 4: In the other segment the other week, we said keep
- 4:53Speaker 4: dating because I want to know where where are you now?
- 4:57Speaker 4: What do you care about? Now?
- 4:58Speaker 3: What's important to you?
- 4:59Speaker 4: Now?
- 5:00Speaker 3: This is your relationship of evolution.
- 5:03Speaker 4: Man, if I can't evolve with my spouse, then I'm trapped.
- 5:06Speaker 3: I'm locked.
- 5:07Speaker 4: I'm locked in And this this is the this is
- 5:10Speaker 4: my last first kiss, this my this is the last
- 5:12Speaker 4: person I want to sleep with. So we gotta we
- 5:14Speaker 4: gotta evolve the last What you like, what you like
- 5:17Speaker 4: now that you didn't like at first, Let's have something else.
- 5:19Speaker 4: Don't you like no more? What you care about? What's
- 5:21Speaker 4: what's important to you? This is how we grow. And
- 5:23Speaker 4: now we've all right, we're gonna come back with the glens.
- 5:25Speaker 1: We're talking about leveraging your differences as strengths and if
- 5:29Speaker 1: you missed any of the conversation, you can always go
- 5:31Speaker 1: back follow us on Facebook, Instagram.
- 5:33Speaker 2: Here with the Glens are gonna come.
- 5:34Speaker 1: Back and talk about using your differences to achieve shared goals.
- 5:39Speaker 2: Also, we welcome your questions.
- 5:40Speaker 1: I know y'all thinking like man, I wish I could
- 5:42Speaker 1: ask them this.
- 5:43Speaker 2: Eight y five nine nine, thirteen ninety. It is Relationship
- 5:47Speaker 2: Talk Thursday.
- 5:48Speaker 1: It's Sonya with Pastor Jamone Glenn and Pastor Erica Glenn
- 5:52Speaker 1: of New Life, and we're talking about leveraging your strengths,
- 5:55Speaker 1: leveraging your differences as strengths.
- 5:57Speaker 2: And you know marriage could be fun, right, we want
- 5:59Speaker 2: to you know, you.
- 6:00Speaker 1: Know we I know we deep up in here, but
- 6:02Speaker 1: we also there's there's fun, there's advantages of being married,
- 6:06Speaker 1: and we're talking about, you know, the differences. Your differences
- 6:10Speaker 1: can be advantageous as it relates to your relationship. So
- 6:13Speaker 1: let's talk about that your difference is to achieve shared goals.
- 6:17Speaker 3: I think what's the goal? First, right, I think.
- 6:19Speaker 2: What's the goal?
- 6:20Speaker 5: And I think, you know, kind of bounce it off
- 6:21Speaker 5: what you're saying that your mariage should be fun and
- 6:24Speaker 5: it is, and so like when we go on vacation,
- 6:27Speaker 5: my husband always stretches me to do these uh these excursions,
- 6:32Speaker 5: and our kids are always like, mom did that, Mom
- 6:35Speaker 5: did that?
- 6:35Speaker 2: And I just is like, no, your.
- 6:37Speaker 3: Mother did not do that. My wife did it on vacation.
- 6:40Speaker 4: She's my wife and she's your mother when she's with you,
- 6:44Speaker 4: but when she's with me, she a whole nother woman
- 6:46Speaker 4: because she's my wife.
- 6:47Speaker 5: And I think that people they forget that there's something
- 6:51Speaker 5: in their spouse that they love, that they pulled out
- 6:54Speaker 5: of them that they don't naturally do. And I think
- 6:57Speaker 5: they don't they don't embrace tho that difference. So, yes,
- 7:00Speaker 5: he's adventurous, and he you know, he he he's jumped
- 7:04Speaker 5: out of a plane, all of that adventure inside of him.
- 7:07Speaker 5: And there's a little bit of me that really likes
- 7:09Speaker 5: saying I like you, you're good, you always killing But
- 7:15Speaker 5: I wouldn't do it by myself. I wouldn't And so
- 7:18Speaker 5: his adventurons causes me to pull something out of me
- 7:22Speaker 5: that most people would know is there.
- 7:24Speaker 2: So it is a major difference, but it is also something.
- 7:27Speaker 5: That I desire, which I was like bigger in but
- 7:30Speaker 5: he pulls it out of me.
- 7:31Speaker 4: And I'm the planner in the relationship. So if I
- 7:33Speaker 4: go to her thinking that she gonna plan it, I'm
- 7:36Speaker 4: gonna be frustrated. I'm the planner. But once I plan
- 7:38Speaker 4: it and set the course, she makes it special. She
- 7:41Speaker 4: does little things like we got treats, and she organized
- 7:45Speaker 4: the process, and how it feels on the way, and
- 7:48Speaker 4: the stuff that's happening that I wouldn't even think about.
- 7:51Speaker 4: I like, I picked the hotel, I picked the flight.
- 7:53Speaker 4: I mean, she get on a plane and don't even
- 7:55Speaker 4: know where we go, maybe asking her where we're going,
- 7:58Speaker 4: like I don't know, I don't know where we're there.
- 8:00Speaker 4: What you mean you're gonna make it? You don't know shit?
- 8:02Speaker 4: Because he like it a certain kind of ways. So
- 8:04Speaker 4: I don't even have to worry about how it's gonna
- 8:06Speaker 4: be when I get there, because it's gonna be. And
- 8:09Speaker 4: in the same way that she doesn't know anything about
- 8:12Speaker 4: that if I forgot something or miss something, although I
- 8:15Speaker 4: fuss about all the bags that she carry on the plane,
- 8:18Speaker 4: if I reach in one of the bags, everything I
- 8:21Speaker 4: could have thought of is in that bag.
- 8:22Speaker 3: She makes that.
- 8:23Speaker 4: She has a way of making the moment special, and
- 8:27Speaker 4: I have a way of making sure we get to
- 8:29Speaker 4: the moment. That's an opportunity to leverage our differences instead
- 8:32Speaker 4: of well, why you don't never plan it?
- 8:34Speaker 3: Why? Well, then the one time when I did encourage
- 8:37Speaker 3: her to planet.
- 8:38Speaker 2: And make sure, and I made sure I never planned
- 8:40Speaker 2: it again.
- 8:42Speaker 3: I tried my.
- 8:43Speaker 4: Very best to enjoy it, to like it, to think
- 8:45Speaker 4: it was wonderful. But it just wasn't wonderful. It wasn't
- 8:47Speaker 4: her foretee. And then I switched it up and she said,
- 8:50Speaker 4: you ain't gotta worry, I ain't never do it again.
- 8:52Speaker 4: I was like, you know what, that's my bag because
- 8:54Speaker 4: I try to do. I try to give you what
- 8:56Speaker 4: I know is my role to do. And my family
- 8:58Speaker 4: we always say everybody got a roll, everybody got a responsibility.
- 9:01Speaker 4: So find out what your role and responsibility is in
- 9:04Speaker 4: your marriage and then lean on.
- 9:06Speaker 3: That will be mad about it.
- 9:08Speaker 4: If you know you pay all the bills, and you
- 9:09Speaker 4: know you make the money, but you spend it up.
- 9:12Speaker 4: You know who better with the money, who got the
- 9:14Speaker 4: better credit card? It'll tell you who manages the most,
- 9:17Speaker 4: who got something at the end of the month. Quit
- 9:19Speaker 4: thinking because you the man that means you're supposed to
- 9:21Speaker 4: manage the money, y'all will be broke. Like if you
- 9:23Speaker 4: don't know what you're doing with the money, don't And
- 9:25Speaker 4: then woman of God, if you know you got the
- 9:27Speaker 4: shopping spirit and you love shopping, you spend everything put
- 9:29Speaker 4: in your hand, don't think you the person that do that. Like,
- 9:32Speaker 4: find your role and embrace your role so that the
- 9:35Speaker 4: couple wins, not just you.
- 9:38Speaker 1: How do you, I mean, how do you own up
- 9:39Speaker 1: to those different those differences?
- 9:42Speaker 2: You know what I'm saying?
- 9:42Speaker 1: Because folks, some folks they overlook them, you know.
- 9:47Speaker 4: They don't overlook them. They it's an area of tension
- 9:50Speaker 4: and conflict. And then they only argue about it exactly
- 9:54Speaker 4: and they don't they don't.
- 9:55Speaker 5: Never say they don't put nothing there, don't put there's
- 9:57Speaker 5: nothing on top of that, they don't have the evan.
- 10:00Speaker 5: If I know that I'm not good with money, why
- 10:02Speaker 5: am I just because I'm the man or necessarily i'm
- 10:06Speaker 5: the woman and that's what I saw.
- 10:07Speaker 2: That doesn't mean that that's what I'm supposed to do.
- 10:09Speaker 5: And I think pride, pride is in there when you were,
- 10:13Speaker 5: when you when you're married, you.
- 10:15Speaker 2: Ten times yourself. So yes, I could do this, I
- 10:19Speaker 2: could pay my bill. I could, Yes, you could, but
- 10:23Speaker 2: is that your strength?
- 10:23Speaker 5: You got married to be able to have strength to
- 10:26Speaker 5: do more things together than you get separate.
- 10:29Speaker 2: So just because you can do it doesn't mean that
- 10:31Speaker 2: you should do it.
- 10:32Speaker 5: It's what in this in this stage of our lives,
- 10:35Speaker 5: we only doing the stuff that we really enjoy loving
- 10:38Speaker 5: to do, and we got the power, we got the strength,
- 10:40Speaker 5: we got the talent and the annoyingty and we see results.
- 10:43Speaker 2: That's what we're doing and we're not being prideful.
- 10:46Speaker 3: Yeah, because we don't.
- 10:47Speaker 4: It slows us down as a unit, so they the
- 10:50Speaker 4: evidence is usually in the tension, so it ends up
- 10:53Speaker 4: being a pain point that you always fussing and arguing about.
- 10:56Speaker 4: But then you never put any parameters in place to
- 10:59Speaker 4: fix it. You only, when it happens, make it a
- 11:02Speaker 4: big deal, But you don't say, well, who is better
- 11:05Speaker 4: at what? And should we be doing this differently? And
- 11:08Speaker 4: that's what I mean by embracing biblical roles and gender roles.
- 11:12Speaker 4: My wife can cook, She cooks amazing. Her food is excellent.
- 11:15Speaker 4: We love her cooking. But sometimes I like to cook,
- 11:19Speaker 4: and my kids enjoy my and the day to day stuff.
- 11:22Speaker 4: When I as a as an exercise of relationship. I'll
- 11:25Speaker 4: cook with my children as a point of doing finding
- 11:28Speaker 4: another thing to do with them. It doesn't diminute. She
- 11:31Speaker 4: could care less. She could care less appreciated, and I
- 11:37Speaker 4: know how to wash dishes, but not her standards.
- 11:41Speaker 3: So sometimes so when I cook, When I cook, I.
- 11:44Speaker 4: Just walk out the kitchen, and she gonna clean up
- 11:46Speaker 4: the kitchen because she like you cook, I'm gona clean
- 11:49Speaker 4: up the kitchen because even if I cleaned up the kitchen,
- 11:51Speaker 4: she's gonna go back and clean up. So she like,
- 11:54Speaker 4: that's what she's going. Yeah, so we understand what we do,
- 11:57Speaker 4: and then we embrass buy the groceries. She go to
- 12:00Speaker 4: the grocery store. She like going to the gross store.
- 12:02Speaker 4: I don't like going to the grocery store. I'll pay
- 12:04Speaker 4: for all the groceries. She go get it, she bring
- 12:07Speaker 4: it home, lay it all out, I'll cook it. When
- 12:09Speaker 4: I finish cooking, we'll sit down and eat it. Then
- 12:11Speaker 4: she'll clean up. Send everybody away.
- 12:13Speaker 3: It works right.
- 12:14Speaker 4: They don't fuss about cultural gender problems. We just embraced
- 12:18Speaker 4: the We're gonna come back with the glens. This relationship talk.
- 12:20Speaker 1: There's got a question how to avoid feeling opposite or
- 12:23Speaker 1: against each other. That question is coming through on Relationship
- 12:27Speaker 1: Talk Thursday. Hi, thank you so much for calling. Good
- 12:30Speaker 1: to hear from you today. It's Relationship Talk Thursday here
- 12:33Speaker 1: with the pastors Dimone and Erica Glenn, and we're talking
- 12:36Speaker 1: about leveraging leveraging your differences as strengths.
- 12:39Speaker 3: What's your question? My question is how do you avoid
- 12:44Speaker 3: feeling against each other?
- 12:50Speaker 2: How do you avoid feeling against each other?
- 12:52Speaker 4: They're your feelings, Yeah, you're responsible for your feeling, yeah.
- 12:58Speaker 5: And I think that you need to I think that
- 13:00Speaker 5: you need to acknowledge the fact that you could be
- 13:05Speaker 5: opposite and there's nothing wrong with being opposite. And I
- 13:09Speaker 5: think sometimes people in marriages feel like they have to
- 13:12Speaker 5: think like their spouse in a sense maybe doing something,
- 13:16Speaker 5: But you don't have to think like your spouse in
- 13:18Speaker 5: regards to how you feel about something. Like to me,
- 13:21Speaker 5: that's the beauty of marriage is having a different perspective
- 13:25Speaker 5: or having a different lens, And when the both of
- 13:28Speaker 5: you are together, you can see different vantage points based
- 13:31Speaker 5: upon where you are and your lenses. But if you
- 13:34Speaker 5: don't appreciate the differences, then you're not really getting the
- 13:38Speaker 5: beautiful things. I think that God wants you to be
- 13:41Speaker 5: able to see inside of your relationship.
- 13:43Speaker 4: Yeah, and the book Power Couples, we talk about disagree
- 13:46Speaker 4: on the how, not the what, and not the why. Right,
- 13:50Speaker 4: there's more than one way to do anything. So if
- 13:53Speaker 4: we know what we're trying to do, why we're trying
- 13:56Speaker 4: to do it, disagree on the how.
- 13:58Speaker 3: It's small. It's more than one way.
- 13:59Speaker 4: To get from here, the Jewels on eighty seventh Street,
- 14:01Speaker 4: on Stoney Island. It's more than one way to get
- 14:04Speaker 4: to anywhere in Chicago, especially Chicago, got multiple ways to
- 14:08Speaker 4: get every place. What you're dealing with is preferences. So
- 14:12Speaker 4: disagree on the how because it doesn't make one way
- 14:15Speaker 4: or the other way wrong. But agree on the what,
- 14:18Speaker 4: agree on the why, and then know that you're never
- 14:21Speaker 4: against each other. Keep the main thing, the main thing,
- 14:24Speaker 4: keep the big picture out front so that you if
- 14:27Speaker 4: let's agree on raising these children, let's agree on staying together,
- 14:31Speaker 4: let's agree on getting out of debt, let's agree on
- 14:33Speaker 4: buying a house. Let's agree on keeping other people out
- 14:36Speaker 4: of our relationship. Now how we go about that? What
- 14:39Speaker 4: do you think and what do you think? Because you
- 14:41Speaker 4: might have a different perspective. Don't ever be against the
- 14:43Speaker 4: person that you're supposed to be building.
- 14:45Speaker 3: A life with.
- 14:46Speaker 2: Is it good for you? So good? Thank you so much,
- 14:49Speaker 2: thank you for calling.
- 14:50Speaker 3: Thanks calling.
- 14:51Speaker 2: Hey, you called right on time. It's relationship.
- 14:54Speaker 1: On Thursday, Inspiration thirteen to ninety here with Pastor Jimone
- 14:57Speaker 1: and Pastor Erica Glenn.
- 14:58Speaker 2: You got a question for.
- 14:59Speaker 3: The team I do. My question is how do you
- 15:03Speaker 3: celebrate experience rather criticized differences?
- 15:08Speaker 5: I would say to me, I would say the first
- 15:10Speaker 5: thing is to make sure that when you are getting
- 15:15Speaker 5: ready to criticize somebody that you think, instead of criticizing,
- 15:20Speaker 5: like do the work of trying to find something that
- 15:23Speaker 5: they're good at and something that you want to highlight
- 15:27Speaker 5: versus just going for the oki.
- 15:29Speaker 2: Though just going for the first thing.
- 15:31Speaker 4: I think you need to that's good. I think you
- 15:33Speaker 4: need to create a culture of celebration. Right when you're
- 15:36Speaker 4: in a grind so much and you're so much after it,
- 15:39Speaker 4: you don't pause to say thank you.
- 15:41Speaker 3: You're doing a good job.
- 15:42Speaker 4: But even if it's your responsibility, you know, sometimes men
- 15:46Speaker 4: often feel taken for granted because you're the priest, because
- 15:49Speaker 4: you provide it, because you pay the bills because you
- 15:52Speaker 4: handle the business. Ladies just say now, that's what you're
- 15:55Speaker 4: supposed to do. But it doesn't mean that you still
- 15:58Speaker 4: don't want to feel celebrated.
- 16:00Speaker 3: I appreciate it.
- 16:00Speaker 4: You know, say thank you sometimes, Yeah I open the
- 16:03Speaker 4: door for you because I'm a gentleman, But say thank you.
- 16:05Speaker 4: Yeah I paid the bill because we sat out and ate,
- 16:07Speaker 4: But say thank you. Yeah you click the lights on
- 16:10Speaker 4: and they came on, But say thank you, you know,
- 16:12Speaker 4: because we should have a culture of a celebration, appreciation
- 16:15Speaker 4: and vice versa. You know, even the things that your
- 16:17Speaker 4: woman does for you. If you create a culture of celebration,
- 16:21Speaker 4: then when you have to criticize or be critical about something,
- 16:25Speaker 4: it goes down a little better because you're not only
- 16:28Speaker 4: highlighting the negative, you're also pointing out the process.
- 16:31Speaker 5: Yeah, and I think that people forget that they have
- 16:34Speaker 5: to make a reservoir of gratitude. Of gratitude, especially when
- 16:40Speaker 5: you know that you're going to have to come in
- 16:42Speaker 5: and criticize somebody about something. So it's like, you know,
- 16:45Speaker 5: they told us as teachers. You know, if you if
- 16:49Speaker 5: the only time you spoke to this student is when
- 16:50Speaker 5: you're trying to correct them, they're going to be rebellious
- 16:53Speaker 5: towards you.
- 16:54Speaker 2: But if you say good morning, and if you say, oh, you.
- 16:56Speaker 5: Know that I like your outfit, when you have to
- 16:58Speaker 5: come and you know that you're going to have to
- 16:59Speaker 5: come to say something, that's going to be hard for them.
- 17:02Speaker 5: They're gonna look at you a little bit differently because
- 17:04Speaker 5: they're going to realize that you didn't only talk to
- 17:06Speaker 5: me when something was wrong.
- 17:08Speaker 3: That's good, that's good.
- 17:09Speaker 4: Yeah, create a culture celebration so criticism is more easily accepted.
- 17:14Speaker 1: Was that good for you.
- 17:16Speaker 4: That?
- 17:17Speaker 2: Thank you for calling and listening?
- 17:18Speaker 3: Have a bus take?
- 17:21Speaker 1: That was good you guys, What a way to close that.
- 17:25Speaker 1: What a great way to close out the show today
- 17:27Speaker 1: with that particular call, because we're talking about leveraging your
- 17:30Speaker 1: differences as strengths.
- 17:31Speaker 2: Any final thoughts from each of you.
- 17:33Speaker 4: Yeah, I just think that people are always more critical
- 17:36Speaker 4: than they are celebratory because we end up taking for granted,
- 17:39Speaker 4: and the longer you are married, the more you end
- 17:43Speaker 4: up taking for granted the things your spouse does. And
- 17:46Speaker 4: no one wants to feel like they're being taken for granted.
- 17:51Speaker 4: So even if I'm doing my responsibility, keeping up to
- 17:55Speaker 4: my end of the bark following after what God's plan
- 17:58Speaker 4: is for me as a husband. It doesn't mean I
- 18:00Speaker 4: want to be I don't want to be celebrated and
- 18:02Speaker 4: appreciated by the one.
- 18:04Speaker 3: I'm doing it for.
- 18:06Speaker 4: And I think parents ought so should teach their children
- 18:09Speaker 4: to appreciate and celebrate your spouse. So let it be
- 18:13Speaker 4: a culture in the house.
- 18:16Speaker 3: He got. You know, my kids.
- 18:17Speaker 4: Say, well, how do you buy the man something that
- 18:19Speaker 4: got everything he wants? But I always tell him it's
- 18:22Speaker 4: not what you buy, it's the effort.
- 18:23Speaker 3: It's the thought.
- 18:24Speaker 4: It's the intention that you put into it that makes
- 18:27Speaker 4: me feel appreciative. I don't need anything, but when I
- 18:30Speaker 4: see you made an effort instead of being like you
- 18:32Speaker 4: got everything, forget it, then I can appreciate that. My
- 18:36Speaker 4: wife teaches my family that, and I teach my family that,
- 18:39Speaker 4: let celebrate and appreciate it.
- 18:40Speaker 2: That's eric you want to close it up.
- 18:41Speaker 5: I think that in this segment, I think to do
- 18:45Speaker 5: some like self evaluation. And what I mean by that
- 18:48Speaker 5: is just really knowing what you bring to the table,
- 18:51Speaker 5: know your strengths and then don't be afraid to share
- 18:55Speaker 5: them in your marriage. And I think sometimes we put
- 18:58Speaker 5: our lives. Our marriage is on autopilot, and we don't
- 19:03Speaker 5: embrace maybe a new strength or something that I've gained
- 19:07Speaker 5: inside of my marriage because your partner, your your spouse,
- 19:11Speaker 5: you know, they're iron and you're iron, and iron is
- 19:13Speaker 5: sharpening iron. So the person that you were ten years ago,
- 19:17Speaker 5: you're not really that person anymore. And the person that
- 19:19Speaker 5: you was five years ago, you're really not that person.
- 19:22Speaker 5: So what what a strength are you bringing to the
- 19:24Speaker 5: relationship now that may not have been so strong before,
- 19:28Speaker 5: And just kind of making sure that you're looking that
- 19:31Speaker 5: inside of your relationship and not just you know, I
- 19:35Speaker 5: know my person, I know I know my spouse. Like, no,
- 19:37Speaker 5: they're a living human being. What exactly are they interested now?
- 19:42Speaker 5: What are some of their strengths that they have now
- 19:43Speaker 5: and they're making that to be a part of your relationship.
- 19:46Speaker 3: I like it.
- 19:46Speaker 1: I like how you all finished each other's words, each
- 19:49Speaker 1: other's sentences.
- 19:50Speaker 2: I just say, all right, you're gonna let us.
- 19:52Speaker 1: Know how we can follow you guys, find you get
- 19:54Speaker 1: some more of this wisdom.
- 19:56Speaker 4: Hey, Jerome Glenn dot com is all the books, all
- 19:59Speaker 4: the conferences, all the conversations that we're doing to help
- 20:03Speaker 4: empower marriages.
- 20:04Speaker 3: Particularly on our YouTube page.
- 20:06Speaker 4: If you want to watch this, we are videotaping it
- 20:09Speaker 4: so you can see it and hear it.
- 20:10Speaker 3: My wife, Lady Erica Glenn is on all the platforms.
- 20:13Speaker 4: We're just out here trying to advance God's call in
- 20:16Speaker 4: kingdom relationships and just really making sure that you have
- 20:19Speaker 4: healthy marriage, healthy relationships.
- 20:20Speaker 3: So you can build a lost of legacy. Yo. It's important.
- 20:23Speaker 3: It's God's original idea.
- 20:24Speaker 2: Its good.
- 20:25Speaker 1: Thank you all so much. Relationship back theresay, We'll be
- 20:27Speaker 1: back next week.
- 20:28Speaker 2: Be with us.
- 20:29Speaker 3: Sign you