Latest / Son of a Boy Dad / Blue Jean Baby - Son of a Boy Dad: Episode #109
Transcript
- 0:00Speaker 1: Hey, Son of a Boy Dad listeners. You can find
- 0:02Speaker 1: every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members
- 0:08Speaker 1: can listen ad free on Amazon Music.
- 0:11Speaker 2: Hey Ryan Reynolds here, wishing you a very happy half
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- 0:33Speaker 3: Slash switch from ten of twet five dollars for three
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- 0:38Speaker 4: thirty b Bye Network, Busy, TAXISMDS Extra, semen Mobile dot com.
- 0:42Speaker 3: Hey everybody, it's Vibs and this is my PSA to
- 0:44Speaker 3: remind you that golf season is officially here.
- 0:48Speaker 1: Whether you end up in the fairway or in the woods, fire.
- 0:51Speaker 3: Up your round this spring with the official shot of
- 0:53Speaker 3: golf Fireball cinnamon whiskey. Slip a couple minis in your
- 0:57Speaker 3: bag for you and the boys so that no matter
- 0:59Speaker 3: how you hit them, you're still having a killer day
- 1:01Speaker 3: out on the course. Ignite the fairways with fireball cinnamon whiskey.
- 1:13Speaker 1: Is that good? Yeah?
- 1:16Speaker 4: Alrighty, Welcome back to Son of a Boy Dad podcast Today.
- 1:19Speaker 4: It is April tenth, It is Monday. We are here
- 1:24Speaker 4: in the studio. No guests this week.
- 1:27Speaker 1: That's okay though, Yeah, I mean we got Owen. Yeah sir,
- 1:33Speaker 1: how's it going?
- 1:34Speaker 4: Oh wait, we're going to be uh Rod and I
- 1:37Speaker 4: are going to be doing a live Son of a
- 1:38Speaker 4: Boy Dad in Austin next week Friday night at like
- 1:42Speaker 4: ten or it is it eight or ten?
- 1:44Speaker 1: I don't know, sometime around then ten, depends on what
- 1:46Speaker 1: time zone you're in. Are they an hour behind or
- 1:49Speaker 1: an hour? Isn't it the same time zone? You think
- 1:52Speaker 1: Austin's the same time zone as New York. I don't know,
- 1:54Speaker 1: it's all the same. We needs an hour. Pay attention
- 1:57Speaker 1: to it. I think it is it more than an
- 1:59Speaker 1: hour now, it's probably just the it's an hour, So
- 2:02Speaker 1: come check the check us the fuck out. I've been
- 2:04Speaker 1: grinding material. I've been at the clubs.
- 2:07Speaker 4: I think that's like on sale aty do it's not there, yeah,
- 2:15Speaker 4: will be in the description or it's just on the
- 2:17Speaker 4: Moon Tire website.
- 2:18Speaker 1: Just look up Son of a Boy Dad Live podcast.
- 2:21Speaker 4: It's cap City or it's probably on the cap City
- 2:23Speaker 4: website too, So find it at one of those places.
- 2:27Speaker 4: Come come see us. It's only one show, so s
- 2:30Speaker 4: tickets are gonna go quick.
- 2:32Speaker 1: Yeah, it's worth the trip for sure.
- 2:35Speaker 4: Yeah, it'd be fun.
- 2:37Speaker 1: No, it is actually gonna be fun. I'm gonna go
- 2:39Speaker 1: down Thursday, come back on Saturday. Are you going Thursday? Yeah?
- 2:42Speaker 1: Oh nice.
- 2:44Speaker 4: So you're not staying at the hotel that they're providing
- 2:45Speaker 4: you with.
- 2:46Speaker 1: I don't know. I have no idea. I know, I'm
- 2:48Speaker 1: sure you're giving me the information, but I don't care.
- 2:51Speaker 1: I don't care what I'm saying. Okay, just tell me that.
- 2:54Speaker 1: Tell me tell me the day beforehand what the information is.
- 2:57Speaker 4: I've given you all the information that where in my email. No,
- 3:00Speaker 4: I've texted it to you like seven separate times.
- 3:02Speaker 1: That's not true.
- 3:03Speaker 4: And every single time you're like, I don't know, I
- 3:04Speaker 4: don't know what are we doing this live show?
- 3:06Speaker 1: I'm like, well, you've confirmed it all three different last
- 3:09Speaker 1: text messages you sent me. How am I still high?
- 3:14Speaker 1: Right now? It's four o'clock. I lost my binky?
- 3:19Speaker 4: Okay, I said, are you in Manhattan, and you said no,
- 3:22Speaker 4: I just left.
- 3:23Speaker 1: Why was that because you need to help with your move? Yeah? Bro,
- 3:26Speaker 1: did you need my car? Now? I end up getting
- 3:29Speaker 1: I just had my buddy Derek do it with me.
- 3:33Speaker 1: I offered you my car though earlier. Yeah, no, I
- 3:35Speaker 1: got a U Haul. Oh you bought your whole U haul?
- 3:37Speaker 4: Yeah, dude, it's fucking so high off the ground, dude,
- 3:40Speaker 4: those things are fucking nuts.
- 3:42Speaker 1: Did you drive it yourself?
- 3:43Speaker 3: Yeah?
- 3:44Speaker 4: It's horrifying, your dude. The U hauls don't make any
- 3:46Speaker 4: sense to me at all. It's you have to be
- 3:48Speaker 4: twenty five to rent.
- 3:49Speaker 1: It, right, you're too young? Yeah?
- 3:51Speaker 4: And U haul you could rent a twenty six foot
- 3:54Speaker 4: truck at eighteen years old and you can live in it,
- 3:57Speaker 4: and it's nineteen dollars. That's twenty and when you get
- 4:01Speaker 4: the twenty dollars insurance, you can just do anything with
- 4:03Speaker 4: the car.
- 4:04Speaker 1: It could.
- 4:05Speaker 4: They're like they're like, yeah, you could. You could wrap
- 4:07Speaker 4: it around a tree and nothing would happen.
- 4:08Speaker 1: Were they're up charges on the nineteen or was it
- 4:11Speaker 1: just flat nineteen with twenty dollars and.
- 4:13Speaker 4: It's like nineteen an hour?
- 4:14Speaker 1: I think okay? And I only have for like two hours,
- 4:17Speaker 1: So you spent sixty dollars and you think talking going
- 4:20Speaker 1: on a killing spree and nothing would happen, just moaning.
- 4:22Speaker 1: People only got the twenty dollars insurance. So he's good,
- 4:25Speaker 1: he's allowed to kill those people. Yeah.
- 4:27Speaker 4: And I showed up and I was like, I want
- 4:28Speaker 4: the pickup truck. I had a reservation for the pickup truck.
- 4:31Speaker 4: And they were like, now, we don't have a pickup truck.
- 4:32Speaker 1: We have a we have a van.
- 4:34Speaker 4: We have a sprinter van. Oh so you got the
- 4:36Speaker 4: sprinter I got the sprinter van. When they are crazy,
- 4:38Speaker 4: they said the van. And then I went outside and
- 4:40Speaker 4: all I saw were like the fifteen foot trucks.
- 4:42Speaker 1: Where'd you have to go for this? It was in Manhattan.
- 4:44Speaker 4: Yeah, it's just Chelsea and uh oh yeah, dude. They
- 4:47Speaker 4: are assholes there too.
- 4:48Speaker 1: There they are.
- 4:49Speaker 4: I thought like TSA was the worst. They're way worse
- 4:52Speaker 4: than TSA.
- 4:53Speaker 1: It's because they're selling like high power vehicles for the
- 4:55Speaker 1: price of like a banana.
- 4:58Speaker 4: Yeah, dude, it how I don't understand how that's legal.
- 5:01Speaker 4: How could I just rent I could literally go and
- 5:04Speaker 4: rent a twenty six foot truck and just drive it
- 5:07Speaker 4: around Manhattan, or like, how do you not need a license?
- 5:09Speaker 4: You know you got how do you not have to
- 5:10Speaker 4: have some sort of like special license a CDL. Yeah,
- 5:13Speaker 4: I could just rent a twenty six foot truck, but
- 5:16Speaker 4: I can't go to like Hurts ad JFK and rent
- 5:18Speaker 4: a Prius.
- 5:19Speaker 1: Yeah, a smart car, yeah.
- 5:20Speaker 4: But a twenty six foot truck.
- 5:23Speaker 1: It really doesn't make any sense. And you're this people
- 5:25Speaker 1: like smoke shit with.
- 5:27Speaker 4: It, dude, Yeah, it's insane. And I was looking at
- 5:32Speaker 4: the insurance, Dude that it's like twenty dollars, it's like anything.
- 5:36Speaker 4: Like they're like, if you get hurt, we'll pay for it,
- 5:38Speaker 4: if your belongings get hurt, if there's a fire, if
- 5:41Speaker 4: you crash into someone else, and they're like they're like,
- 5:43Speaker 4: we know a lot of people don't know how to
- 5:44Speaker 4: drive these trucks, so the insurance policy is super solid.
- 5:48Speaker 1: And I'm like, how is this legal? I feel like
- 5:50Speaker 1: I've told this story on here before, but my boy
- 5:52Speaker 1: John Or rented a U haul truck in Philly like
- 5:55Speaker 1: to move in tight, tight ass streets, and he smoked
- 5:58Speaker 1: somebody's rear view off, and he has a very heavy conscience.
- 6:01Speaker 1: So we called the cops and waited for a half
- 6:03Speaker 1: probably for them to get here smoked.
- 6:05Speaker 4: They're like he has the U haul insurance, Like they
- 6:07Speaker 4: don't want to deal with that ship right now.
- 6:09Speaker 1: It took like two hours of his time and then
- 6:11Speaker 1: he just went around the next corner and smoked someone else. Yeah,
- 6:15Speaker 1: and then he just drove off. The second time. He
- 6:17Speaker 1: was like, fuck this, I'm not waiting again. They're way
- 6:20Speaker 1: too tight. Yeah.
- 6:21Speaker 4: My buddy, that I the guy that I helped Derek,
- 6:23Speaker 4: my friend that helped me move. He I had to
- 6:25Speaker 4: go pick him up, and he lives in East Village
- 6:27Speaker 4: and like the streets in East Village they're tight, like
- 6:29Speaker 4: the in between roads. And Dude, I was driving and
- 6:31Speaker 4: I was like, I'm gonna fucking kill somebody in this
- 6:33Speaker 4: thing because even the sprinter van Ian, Dude, I haven't
- 6:35Speaker 4: I've driven a car like once in the last like
- 6:37Speaker 4: three years.
- 6:38Speaker 1: You don't know how anymore.
- 6:39Speaker 4: The sprinter van you are. You are up there like that,
- 6:43Speaker 4: you're above the wheels, like way above the wheels, and
- 6:46Speaker 4: you're like, I mean you got to be at least
- 6:47Speaker 4: like seven feet off the ground, like there's like stairs
- 6:50Speaker 4: to get up to where you're going.
- 6:52Speaker 1: The big box one, like there's no rear view mirror
- 6:55Speaker 1: and there's a there's no rearview in the in the
- 6:58Speaker 1: other one either because there's a case.
- 7:00Speaker 4: It's like you know how the vans they have the
- 7:01Speaker 4: cage behind so you can't see anything.
- 7:04Speaker 1: So it's twice as wide as what you're used to,
- 7:06Speaker 1: twice as tall as what you.
- 7:07Speaker 4: Can't see anyone behind you or to the side of you.
- 7:09Speaker 4: I kept on like looking behind me to see if
- 7:11Speaker 4: there was like a biker, and then I'm just looking
- 7:13Speaker 4: in the.
- 7:13Speaker 1: Back of the van and there or there's these two mirrors,
- 7:16Speaker 1: but like they don't work like normal mirrors now, they're
- 7:18Speaker 1: like convex mirrors. You have to train your eye to
- 7:20Speaker 1: be ready for them. By the time you train your eye,
- 7:22Speaker 1: you've killed three pedestrians. Yeah, it's fucking brutal.
- 7:25Speaker 4: It's insane, and I like went, I picked it up,
- 7:28Speaker 4: and so I got the van and then I'm just
- 7:30Speaker 4: standing outside. They don't give you any instructions, Like I
- 7:32Speaker 4: hate when you go plays like that and they just
- 7:33Speaker 4: expect you to know where to go. So I'm just
- 7:36Speaker 4: like standing out and I hate not knowing where I'm
- 7:38Speaker 4: supposed to be going or where I'm supposed to.
- 7:39Speaker 1: Be very uncomfortable. Yeah.
- 7:41Speaker 4: So I'm just standing there and all work there and
- 7:44Speaker 4: they're just walking by me and I'm like, Hi, I'm
- 7:47Speaker 4: here to pick up the sprinter van and they're like, yeah,
- 7:50Speaker 4: it's over there. And I'm like, well, like, do what
- 7:53Speaker 4: you guys have, like keys or anything. And they're like, oh, yeah,
- 7:55Speaker 4: we'll get you the keys. I'm like, what, Like, what
- 7:57Speaker 4: do they want me? They want to be like hot
- 7:58Speaker 4: wire or the car or some shit. They were looking
- 8:00Speaker 4: at me like what was I was insane. I was like, yeah,
- 8:02Speaker 4: it's right there. What race were they? You know what
- 8:05Speaker 4: race they were?
- 8:05Speaker 1: Bro? Yeah they're ag Asian.
- 8:08Speaker 4: Now I'm kidding. They were all mixed races, just you know,
- 8:11Speaker 4: they were all one race.
- 8:13Speaker 1: And they did not like me.
- 8:15Speaker 4: And I think it was because of my race, like
- 8:19Speaker 4: ninety nine percent sure it was because of my race
- 8:21Speaker 4: that they did not like me. And then you go
- 8:24Speaker 4: drop it off, dude, you go drop it off, and
- 8:26Speaker 4: they're just like looking at me like I'm fucking insane, and.
- 8:29Speaker 1: I'm like, am I all good to go?
- 8:30Speaker 4: And they're like yeah, and I'm like and I'm sitting
- 8:33Speaker 4: in the car for like ten minutes before they say
- 8:35Speaker 4: that I'm allowed to go, and then they're like, yeah, dude,
- 8:37Speaker 4: you can leave.
- 8:37Speaker 1: People must just be dropping those shits off and like
- 8:40Speaker 1: hiding the key, so they're like leaving them a treasure
- 8:42Speaker 1: map to find the key. Dude.
- 8:43Speaker 4: They were assholes. They were crazy cranky people. Understandable, but real.
- 8:48Speaker 1: Cranky because that's their job. Probugs. They're in probug as.
- 8:52Speaker 4: They're just inhaling fumes the entire time. They're in a garage,
- 8:56Speaker 4: and they like leave the car on, kept on saying
- 8:59Speaker 4: leave the car on.
- 9:00Speaker 1: It kills us, it kills us. Yeah, they got the
- 9:02Speaker 1: insurance on our life. It was successful.
- 9:04Speaker 4: I will say I did get to my apartment on
- 9:07Speaker 4: Friday night. I like moved, so I brought all the
- 9:10Speaker 4: shit into the U haul and then I drove it
- 9:11Speaker 4: over to my new apartment right and I loaded it
- 9:14Speaker 4: and I brought it all up, and Uh, I got
- 9:16Speaker 4: up and I realized that I never called kan Ed,
- 9:19Speaker 4: so I just was in pitch black and uh, and
- 9:26Speaker 4: I called Conned. I was on the hold with them
- 9:27Speaker 4: for an hour and a half and then I just
- 9:28Speaker 4: hung up. And then I just was like, I guess
- 9:31Speaker 4: I'll just go out and then just come back and
- 9:32Speaker 4: fall asleep here.
- 9:33Speaker 1: And then I fell asleep and I woke up and
- 9:35Speaker 1: the lights were on, Oh they were on.
- 9:37Speaker 4: Yeah, well I did the content stuff online. But you
- 9:39Speaker 4: you you can't do like immediate turn on its like
- 9:41Speaker 4: it has to be like you've just said it.
- 9:43Speaker 1: I said it. The earliest day was the next day. Yeah,
- 9:46Speaker 1: you vastly underestimated how much of an ordeal moving.
- 9:50Speaker 4: Well, I also did not move almost all of my stuff,
- 9:53Speaker 4: Like most of my stuff is still at my other.
- 9:54Speaker 1: But you still have your old apartment.
- 9:56Speaker 4: Yeah, I just got to go get it. It's like
- 9:58Speaker 4: most of my clothes are there.
- 9:59Speaker 1: The video that you posted or the still photo that
- 10:02Speaker 1: you posted of your little monitor on the ground was
- 10:05Speaker 1: maybe the saddest thing that I've ever seen in my life. Dude,
- 10:08Speaker 1: you don't have to live like that. You know that
- 10:09Speaker 1: you're successful and old enough that you don't have I had.
- 10:12Speaker 4: I don't have anything else to put it on. I
- 10:13Speaker 4: didn't have it, Like my desk just got here. You
- 10:15Speaker 4: gotta go home after this and sat up my desk.
- 10:17Speaker 1: You could have wall mounted it, you know what I mean?
- 10:19Speaker 4: How were you was like a wall mount? How do
- 10:21Speaker 4: you think you think that would be easier to wall mounted.
- 10:23Speaker 1: Were you laying on your tummy on the floor?
- 10:25Speaker 4: Oh, I was sitting on the edge of my bed
- 10:27Speaker 4: and playing. It was actually like it was significantly better
- 10:29Speaker 4: than my.
- 10:29Speaker 1: Old set up. Your mattress was on the floor, yes,
- 10:31Speaker 1: and you were sitting on the edge of it. Yes.
- 10:34Speaker 1: Your monitor was on the floor. You had to be
- 10:36Speaker 1: fucking fully hunched over to be even be able to
- 10:38Speaker 1: see a raised Oh. Why the box was there? What
- 10:41Speaker 1: kind of box? Did you not see? The box?
- 10:43Speaker 4: It was like a one inch box and it helped
- 10:45Speaker 4: a lot. I watched Succession last night. I just stacked
- 10:49Speaker 4: a bunch of boxes and then put one heavy one
- 10:51Speaker 4: in the back and lean my TV up against it.
- 10:52Speaker 4: It's like a whole TV stand that episode.
- 10:56Speaker 1: In my fucking in my apartment right now. Hundreds of boxes.
- 10:58Speaker 1: You're just gonna throw them out the window or just
- 11:00Speaker 1: I don't know them to do, dude.
- 11:02Speaker 4: Because Amazon, you'll order like a plunger and they'll send
- 11:05Speaker 4: you a twenty foot box with a plunger just rattling around.
- 11:08Speaker 1: Inside of it. Yeah, or like five boxes. It'll be
- 11:11Speaker 1: like a Russian nessed dot with a little tiny plunger
- 11:13Speaker 1: at the bottom of it super annoying, not true to size.
- 11:17Speaker 1: What can you do? How fucking crazy was that suck
- 11:19Speaker 1: Session episode last night? You watch the session? No, but
- 11:23Speaker 1: I heard everybody saying how fucking crazy it was.
- 11:25Speaker 4: Yeah, I don't want to spoil it for anyone. Pretty
- 11:27Speaker 4: crazy though, Yeah, you haven't.
- 11:28Speaker 1: Watched it move, Yeah, I don't want to spoil it.
- 11:30Speaker 1: It was crazy, Logan Logan had that fucking finally some
- 11:34Speaker 1: come up and after he killed that guy season one.
- 11:36Speaker 4: Hell, Logan didn't kill anyone, bro, You dumbass.
- 11:41Speaker 1: Candle Kendel Kendel Kennel, I don't fucking know, dude. She
- 11:44Speaker 1: was good though. It was a good episode. Really, I
- 11:46Speaker 1: didn't know that they did the whole like, uh, like
- 11:48Speaker 1: did you move?
- 11:48Speaker 4: Did you know that they did the whole like interviews
- 11:50Speaker 4: with the backers after I never knew that they did that.
- 11:53Speaker 1: Like every after every episode. Yeah, I didn't know they
- 11:55Speaker 1: did that. I watched it for Yeah, they do it
- 11:58Speaker 1: for every show fbh BIOSHO. So yeah, maybe that's kind
- 12:02Speaker 1: of on you yesterday. You've never watched the show, did
- 12:04Speaker 1: before the show?
- 12:06Speaker 5: Yeah, but do any of the HBO shows do that?
- 12:08Speaker 1: Every HBO show you didn't watch on White Lotus. I
- 12:12Speaker 1: didn't watch White Lotus. Oh yeah, too painful after you
- 12:16Speaker 1: didn't get the call. No, dude, I just didn't watch it.
- 12:19Speaker 1: It was great, I heard.
- 12:21Speaker 4: I'm going to get around to watching it. I'll probably
- 12:22Speaker 4: watch that soon. Watching Barry right now. Oh great, great
- 12:26Speaker 4: show just started. That funny ass fucking show. Yeah, but
- 12:30Speaker 4: also serious brings a little light to the plight of
- 12:33Speaker 4: the hit man.
- 12:34Speaker 1: Yeah, probably a hard life, probably, Yeah, probably pretty cool
- 12:39Speaker 1: though maybe none of these motherfuckers know I'm a hit
- 12:42Speaker 1: man standing in the corner. No, but I mean, like
- 12:45Speaker 1: that's that's got to be how it feels at all times,
- 12:48Speaker 1: just like you know, you could kill anybody. Yeah, it
- 12:51Speaker 1: is interesting you dress like the people that killed Batman's parents.
- 12:56Speaker 4: I don't know who killed Batman's parents. I don't even
- 12:59Speaker 4: know they showed that. And what movie do they show them?
- 13:01Speaker 4: And not like you you mean the comic books.
- 13:04Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't know, and like Batman and Robin ninety six. Yeah,
- 13:07Speaker 1: I didn't watch that shit. But you did get jeans
- 13:10Speaker 1: for the first time, and maybe like I've had five
- 13:12Speaker 1: years for a while. No, these are new, No, these
- 13:15Speaker 1: are not.
- 13:15Speaker 4: I mean I've worn them like once, I have them
- 13:18Speaker 4: because I brought all my laundry in today.
- 13:21Speaker 1: I think they looked dope. I bought every single pair
- 13:23Speaker 1: of clothing that I have. I have no clothes. Some
- 13:25Speaker 1: people disparagedim. No, I'm a big denim guy. Really, yeah,
- 13:30Speaker 1: I've never seen you. I had to throw these on
- 13:32Speaker 1: when I was when I was building my chair.
- 13:33Speaker 4: Yesterday, I was putting together my computer chair and I
- 13:38Speaker 4: had to throw on the blue jeans.
- 13:39Speaker 1: Smoking a corn cup. Yeah, yeah, it's cool.
- 13:42Speaker 4: They come with a pack of Marlboro six just built
- 13:44Speaker 4: into the back.
- 13:46Speaker 1: It was awesome.
- 13:48Speaker 4: I was getting real I was stretching them out, getting
- 13:50Speaker 4: real low.
- 13:51Speaker 1: The jeans. Yeah, yeah, they were probably pretty stiff before that.
- 13:54Speaker 1: Oh yeah, got them in the freezer for months, what
- 13:56Speaker 1: with all the come on top of the Japanese denim salvaged. Yeah,
- 14:02Speaker 1: but salvage shit. I bought some and a lot.
- 14:05Speaker 4: Of these just giving myself and I smack with them.
- 14:07Speaker 1: They sound loud.
- 14:08Speaker 4: I feel like I'm Brett Farv you smacking a lot
- 14:11Speaker 4: of ass in those commercials Wrangler gen Yeah, just getting
- 14:14Speaker 4: real low. It's all about like hike, Yeah, It's all
- 14:17Speaker 4: about getting low and showing off the ass.
- 14:19Speaker 1: Smack cool little leather pat leather patch on the back. Yeah,
- 14:23Speaker 1: like the old Navy. Yeah, oh really, you shouldn't have
- 14:27Speaker 1: said that. Why all my pants are Old Navy? These are?
- 14:31Speaker 4: I think that's the best.
- 14:31Speaker 3: Dude.
- 14:31Speaker 4: You should get all your pants from one place and
- 14:33Speaker 4: then you go and you know exactly what size you are.
- 14:35Speaker 1: These ones are Abercrombie and Fished.
- 14:37Speaker 4: Yeah, and you like, you'll go someplace and you'll be like, oh,
- 14:40Speaker 4: you're a twenty four inch waist. Then you'll go another
- 14:41Speaker 4: place and they're like, you're forty three inch waist.
- 14:44Speaker 1: Why why is it not all the same? They do
- 14:46Speaker 1: lie to you. You know what it is? Vanity sizing. Yeah, bro,
- 14:50Speaker 1: they tell you you're like a little skinny bitchy and it's like, no,
- 14:53Speaker 1: you're fat. I'm fat as shit. Give me the right pant.
- 14:55Speaker 1: Be real with me, Old Navy, Yeah, be real with me.
- 14:58Speaker 4: Yeah, twenty fours and then I go somewhere else. You
- 15:00Speaker 4: get at twenty four and I can't even fit them
- 15:01Speaker 4: around one of my legs.
- 15:03Speaker 1: Yeah that forever twenty one. Yeah, they're lying to you,
- 15:06Speaker 1: a super annoying lying to you. Fuck them.
- 15:10Speaker 4: Yeah, it feels damn got to have the blue jeans on. Yeah,
- 15:12Speaker 4: I just kind of feel like a man.
- 15:14Speaker 1: You can get rock hard and it just pushes your
- 15:15Speaker 1: dick down.
- 15:16Speaker 6: Yeah.
- 15:17Speaker 4: I'm gonna go to Home Depot after this and just post.
- 15:19Speaker 1: Up, post up with the lumber. Yeah, like I'm hard
- 15:22Speaker 1: as you. Yeah, I'm rock hard as the two by fours.
- 15:29Speaker 7: I'm not going back to college to be your friend.
- 15:32Speaker 7: I'm going so I can get Uber one for students.
- 15:34Speaker 7: It saves you on Uber and Uber Eats. I'm there
- 15:37Speaker 7: for zero dollar delivery fee on cheeseburgers, up to ten
- 15:40Speaker 7: percent off smoothies, and six percent Uber credits back on rides.
- 15:44Speaker 7: Just to be clear, I'm there for savings, not whatever
- 15:47Speaker 7: you think college is for Get.
- 15:49Speaker 4: Uber one for students, a membership to save on Uber
- 15:51Speaker 4: and Uber eats.
- 15:52Speaker 5: What deals this good?
- 15:53Speaker 1: Everyone wants to be a student joined for just four
- 15:56Speaker 1: ninety nine a month.
- 15:56Speaker 5: Savings may very eligibility and member terms apply right.
- 16:03Speaker 1: Home Depot's dope to walk around, but it's a little
- 16:05Speaker 1: bit overwhelming.
- 16:06Speaker 4: It's like the biggest store in Manhattan. Yeah, it's got
- 16:08Speaker 4: to be one of them. It's tall, it's huge, it's
- 16:12Speaker 4: big and tall.
- 16:13Speaker 1: I love the videos of the Paletts falling over all
- 16:15Speaker 1: the fucking all the whenever all the shells fall over
- 16:18Speaker 1: in a home depot or a big box store, a warehouse.
- 16:20Speaker 4: Yeah, that's gotta be a devastated I would just quit instantly.
- 16:24Speaker 1: You have to. Yeah, Or maybe it's fun for a
- 16:26Speaker 1: couple of days, a little a different task clean up. Yah, yeah,
- 16:28Speaker 1: cleanup's got to be a good one. Yeah, it's like
- 16:31Speaker 1: excavating after nine to eleven. I heard they got the
- 16:35Speaker 1: best men from home depot after that. Yeah, probably the
- 16:38Speaker 1: best workers from home depot in the Tri State area.
- 16:42Speaker 4: The worst workers at home depot are the best workers
- 16:44Speaker 4: at U haul home Depot. Boys have a good work
- 16:46Speaker 4: at work ethic.
- 16:47Speaker 5: Have you seen this video last week the home depot
- 16:50Speaker 5: workers who got caught?
- 16:51Speaker 1: Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, I did see that. I know
- 16:54Speaker 1: that was tough. They were spooning in it, bean Ben,
- 16:58Speaker 1: that's way more weird.
- 17:00Speaker 4: That's more weird than if they were just aggressively fucking.
- 17:03Speaker 4: They're just like spooning with home deepot.
- 17:06Speaker 1: With your work wife.
- 17:07Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, let's go take a weird like, go take
- 17:11Speaker 4: a little nap together.
- 17:12Speaker 1: Their significant others have to feel more betrayed by the
- 17:15Speaker 1: fact that they're just like snuggling like that. It wasn't
- 17:18Speaker 1: even second.
- 17:19Speaker 4: They were like standing sixty nine ing. It probably would
- 17:21Speaker 4: have been better.
- 17:22Speaker 1: I was just sucking his dick, yeah yeah. But the
- 17:25Speaker 1: fact that they were just like snoring, like the Seven
- 17:28Speaker 1: Dwarfs like me, Yeah, yeah, yeah, snuggling with each other.
- 17:32Speaker 1: That's intimate. Like he's just like smelling her hair.
- 17:36Speaker 4: Under a fucking bunch of boxes.
- 17:38Speaker 1: Yeah, like Dwight and Angela. Yeah, but not even having
- 17:42Speaker 1: the dirty fuck the whole episode of the Office where
- 17:44Speaker 1: they do that, like the whole season. Everyone's going to that.
- 17:47Speaker 4: No, not just them though, like everyone in the office
- 17:49Speaker 4: is going probably yeah, they all find d white Spot kind.
- 17:52Speaker 1: Of a dickhead moved by whoever put that video out there.
- 17:55Speaker 1: Sure show it to like mid management, but don't show
- 17:58Speaker 1: the whole fucking internet.
- 18:00Speaker 4: Well that's just like, that's just how the internet is now.
- 18:03Speaker 4: You don't keep anything to yourself. Everything's got to go up.
- 18:05Speaker 1: I gotta go and fight, haven.
- 18:07Speaker 4: I honestly got a little weird, weird doub when people
- 18:09Speaker 4: take videos of me and then they don't post them
- 18:11Speaker 4: on the internet, Like what do you You're just keeping
- 18:13Speaker 4: that video to yourself?
- 18:14Speaker 1: Just have that like what are you doing with that?
- 18:17Speaker 1: Or like someone hitting you with a candid video and
- 18:19Speaker 1: they're like, no, you weren't good enough. Yeah, it wasn't
- 18:22Speaker 1: good enough. It's like, well it was a candid video
- 18:24Speaker 1: of me, dude, I wasn't trying to be good enough.
- 18:26Speaker 4: Yeah, when I were moving, my buddy Derek took a
- 18:29Speaker 4: video of me and he was like, yeah, he just
- 18:31Speaker 4: hit like twenty bikers.
- 18:32Speaker 1: He really doesn't miss. And then he just kept it
- 18:35Speaker 1: on his.
- 18:35Speaker 4: Phone, Like what is this is just for your personal
- 18:38Speaker 4: collection of like jokes.
- 18:40Speaker 1: He's probably waiting to save it for when you actually
- 18:42Speaker 1: do hit twenty bikers. Yeah. Probably, he's been a fucking maniac.
- 18:46Speaker 1: This is from three years ago.
- 18:48Speaker 4: I had to have him parallel park it and I
- 18:50Speaker 4: had to get out and direct him.
- 18:52Speaker 1: That's so embarrassing, dude, I was not gonna try and
- 18:54Speaker 1: parallel park that thing. How much older than menu is he?
- 18:59Speaker 1: Twenty years? Probably? Oh really?
- 19:01Speaker 2: Yeah?
- 19:01Speaker 1: Yeah, well you got to give that up to him.
- 19:03Speaker 3: Yeah.
- 19:04Speaker 1: He's not allowed to drive legally, only U hauls. Yeah
- 19:08Speaker 1: that's probably how you haul.
- 19:09Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, you can drive if you have like under
- 19:12Speaker 4: ten DUIs, you can drive a U haul And if
- 19:16Speaker 4: you have to drive fifteen footers, Fellens, you just can't
- 19:21Speaker 4: drive the twenty six footers if you have twenty u duuys,
- 19:26Speaker 4: I was just cruising around in the twenty six foot U.
- 19:28Speaker 1: Haul with your eighteen year old ass. Yeah, going through
- 19:32Speaker 1: puberty as you smoke cars.
- 19:34Speaker 4: That should be like a social experiment, dude. Like someone
- 19:37Speaker 4: like an eighteen year old rents a pickup truck and
- 19:38Speaker 4: they're like, all we got is the twenty six footer,
- 19:41Speaker 4: and they're like, I guess I'll take the twenty six footer.
- 19:43Speaker 4: You don't realize how big twenty six feet is until
- 19:45Speaker 4: you're standing next to the twenty six foot U haul
- 19:48Speaker 4: truck that you just paid twenty dollars to drive around
- 19:50Speaker 4: the city.
- 19:51Speaker 1: We should start sending fourteen year olds into U haul,
- 19:54Speaker 1: like truth dot com.
- 19:56Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, well it's probably the same thing with like
- 19:59Speaker 4: hurt It's like with Hurts, you can pay if you're
- 20:01Speaker 4: twenty one, you can pay, if you're over twenty one,
- 20:03Speaker 4: you can pay like ten bucks extra and rent a car.
- 20:06Speaker 1: Really, that's all it is. There's some where you can
- 20:08Speaker 1: do that at U haul.
- 20:09Speaker 4: It's probably like if you're under eighteen, if you're under sixteen,
- 20:11Speaker 4: you can if you're sixteen, you can rent a trailer there. Yeah,
- 20:15Speaker 4: I'm dead serious. I looked it all up.
- 20:17Speaker 1: For what what are you hooking a trailer or two?
- 20:19Speaker 4: I guess if you're like mowing lawns or some shit
- 20:22Speaker 4: what I think?
- 20:23Speaker 1: Or moving?
- 20:23Speaker 4: I guess you can move. You can use your own
- 20:25Speaker 4: car and attach a trailer.
- 20:26Speaker 1: We just undeath the fucking massive conspiracy with you haul.
- 20:30Speaker 1: What the hell is going on over there? I just
- 20:34Speaker 1: don't understand how that's the thing. It's got to be
- 20:36Speaker 1: linked to.
- 20:36Speaker 4: Fucking Maybe they just like maybe if you're that young
- 20:39Speaker 4: and you go in, they're just like no, they're probably
- 20:41Speaker 4: just like, fuck you, you're not getting a fucking truck. But
- 20:44Speaker 4: they're probably not judging off of who was there working.
- 20:46Speaker 4: I'm assuming they're not telling anyone. No, they never even
- 20:50Speaker 4: asked for my license.
- 20:51Speaker 1: This is America, bro, They really shouldn't be telling anyone. Know,
- 20:53Speaker 1: it's true. They should just let people behind the wheel.
- 20:56Speaker 1: How come there's like fourteen year olds that can drive
- 20:58Speaker 1: race cars and shit like that. But my ninety five
- 21:01Speaker 1: year old grandpa fucking kills two people when he's driving
- 21:04Speaker 1: and he can't go anymore.
- 21:06Speaker 4: Yeah, just get him a twenty six foot U haul
- 21:08Speaker 4: able to drive with that thing. It's insane.
- 21:10Speaker 1: You ever watched the old jackasses when they have like
- 21:13Speaker 1: roller skating parties in the back of a U all out.
- 21:15Speaker 1: Now they run a U haul and have like a
- 21:17Speaker 1: roller derby like disco night. That's we're just getting smoked.
- 21:22Speaker 1: We gotta do more wacky hijinks like that. They brought
- 21:26Speaker 1: us into the fucking meeting, our yearly meeting, and they're like,
- 21:30Speaker 1: we need you guys. Just strap yourselves into a porta
- 21:32Speaker 1: potty and launch yourselves. Yeah yeah, cover yourselves with shit.
- 21:37Speaker 1: The mean girls are doing stuff more like Jackass two
- 21:40Speaker 1: point five. Yeah.
- 21:41Speaker 4: They want us to move studios, right, they want us
- 21:43Speaker 4: to start filming at our houses.
- 21:45Speaker 1: Yeah that's why you move, right, Yeah, so we can
- 21:47Speaker 1: fucking live face down on the floor. Yeah yeah, like
- 21:50Speaker 1: we're sniping about USA. Guys.
- 21:52Speaker 4: If you wanted to do that at my apartment, but
- 21:54Speaker 4: then I was like, I like, we couldn't find somewhere
- 21:56Speaker 4: from me and you just sit. But then I'm like
- 21:57Speaker 4: they would all have to just stand. There's literally no
- 22:00Speaker 4: where to sit.
- 22:01Speaker 1: That would be funny to do it at your empty apartment,
- 22:03Speaker 1: Like the end of fresh prints to see you looking around.
- 22:07Speaker 4: I was thinking about taking a picture like that for
- 22:09Speaker 4: a while and I didn't do it.
- 22:11Speaker 1: Damn, bro. Kind of like your boy who never put
- 22:13Speaker 1: out his content. Who's my boy Derek forty two year
- 22:17Speaker 1: old truck driver who filmed me. Yeah, you told me
- 22:19Speaker 1: about him not two minutes ago. It was hilarious.
- 22:23Speaker 4: I tit him up and I was like, Yo, I'll
- 22:24Speaker 4: pay you one hundred dollars if you help me move
- 22:26Speaker 4: my mattress.
- 22:27Speaker 1: And he was like, what do I look like? Dude?
- 22:30Speaker 4: He's like, I make one hundred thousand dollars a year,
- 22:32Speaker 4: so you think I need your one hundred dollars to
- 22:33Speaker 4: move a mattress? And then he said, yeah, I'll take
- 22:36Speaker 4: one hundred dollars to do with the mattress. I said, yeah,
- 22:39Speaker 4: look who Yeah, dumb.
- 22:40Speaker 1: Asked one hundred dollars. One hundred thousand dollars a year
- 22:43Speaker 1: in New York. Bro, he's basically on food stand. It's
- 22:46Speaker 1: more than I make. He's basically pover.
- 22:49Speaker 4: Double my barstool salary.
- 22:50Speaker 1: Yeah, but you're just moving from one project to another project.
- 22:53Speaker 4: At one hundred dollars is a lot for me. That's
- 22:55Speaker 4: like a week at barstool.
- 23:00Speaker 1: To do more work. Bro, you gotta fucking take time
- 23:02Speaker 1: off from panhandling to do it. Yeah, you're outside with
- 23:05Speaker 1: a tin can and a guitar singing Bob Dylan tunes.
- 23:10Speaker 1: When I first started here, I thought about getting another job.
- 23:12Speaker 4: I thought about, like getting a job at your potle life.
- 23:15Speaker 1: I'm not kidding, I really did. So.
- 23:18Speaker 4: They also just had nothing to do. I was just
- 23:20Speaker 4: doing nothing, and I was like, maybe I'll just get
- 23:22Speaker 4: another job and for the blog fuck around.
- 23:25Speaker 1: Like tell people, I mean, jobs like that are the
- 23:27Speaker 1: most fun. Yeah, especially if I don't really need it,
- 23:30Speaker 1: you make probably better friendships. Yeah, I need some people.
- 23:33Speaker 1: And like you're in the same boat as everybody hating
- 23:36Speaker 1: their life. Yeah. Like there's some people here who are
- 23:38Speaker 1: rich as fuck, just going home to their like families
- 23:40Speaker 1: and shit like that. Yeah, to their fucking massive mansions.
- 23:45Speaker 1: Reegs goes home every night that his fucking boat house. Yeah.
- 23:49Speaker 1: It's fucking bullshit. But uh, you know, some of us,
- 23:54Speaker 1: some of us have the short under the stick. We
- 23:55Speaker 1: got to get it out of the mud. You know,
- 23:57Speaker 1: me and you, brother, No, bro, not me and you, yes, brother,
- 24:00Speaker 1: me and you same and stoop down to my level.
- 24:03Speaker 4: What do you mean and you were in the same
- 24:05Speaker 4: billion dollars a year.
- 24:06Speaker 1: I fucking wish, bro, you think I'd be.
- 24:09Speaker 4: Dressing it in new fits every day?
- 24:11Speaker 1: What are you talking about? How everyone knows how I
- 24:13Speaker 1: only have one fit? Bro.
- 24:15Speaker 4: My debit card is maxed out right now, Mike, I
- 24:17Speaker 4: didn't even you could.
- 24:18Speaker 1: That's not true. And you know how I know it's
- 24:20Speaker 1: not true. Pull your wallet out right now? Why? Because
- 24:23Speaker 1: I know you have a fat water cash in there. No,
- 24:25Speaker 1: you always do. Pull it out.
- 24:26Speaker 4: Then, I have like twenty dollars out wallet. Let me
- 24:29Speaker 4: dig them out of my blue jeans.
- 24:31Speaker 1: It's tough tough to get them out of these things.
- 24:33Speaker 1: Look at all that cash. Look at all that Look
- 24:36Speaker 1: at all that cash. I have four dollars. No, you're
- 24:41Speaker 1: hiding the hundreds behind the four ones that you have
- 24:43Speaker 1: in there. No hundreds twenty. He always sits with the
- 24:48Speaker 1: fattest wad I have like and pretends to be poor
- 24:51Speaker 1: twenty seven dollar because you feel like it would hurt
- 24:53Speaker 1: your comedy career if they knew how rich you were.
- 24:56Speaker 1: Count of thirty four, I have twenty euros in my wallet. Yeah, case,
- 24:59Speaker 1: I we need to get out of the country like Jason.
- 25:02Speaker 4: Bourne max out my debit card though he did. Yeah,
- 25:04Speaker 4: apparently I have like a spending limit. I spent it
- 25:06Speaker 4: all on a couch.
- 25:07Speaker 1: Oh, that's probably your single day spending limit.
- 25:09Speaker 4: No, I think it's a week over at Rocklin. Trust,
- 25:12Speaker 4: we do things different. It's a spending limit because like
- 25:17Speaker 4: we literally don't have.
- 25:18Speaker 1: The other money.
- 25:19Speaker 4: Like we're gonna have to like take a loan.
- 25:21Speaker 1: Out to pay you back back? Is robbing Peter to
- 25:23Speaker 1: pay Yeah, just taking money out of some other we'd
- 25:26Speaker 1: have to move some things around. If you want to
- 25:28Speaker 1: get that red Bull, someone else took out money this week.
- 25:32Speaker 1: The guy in the account next you actually got a
- 25:34Speaker 1: red Bull already this week, so you can't. Yeah, that's
- 25:38Speaker 1: exactly how it is. No, that's not true, bro. Yeah,
- 25:41Speaker 1: I know you're fucking swimming in it. I see how
- 25:44Speaker 1: much we're getting paid for this Austin, this little Austin show.
- 25:47Speaker 1: I'm not getting paid that much to you. Maybe to
- 25:50Speaker 1: me it's a lot. Yeah, we're getting it. We're getting
- 25:52Speaker 1: a good show. To me, it's a ton. What is
- 25:54Speaker 1: like one hundred and twenty thou?
- 25:55Speaker 4: Oh you want you wants to go hunt?
- 25:58Speaker 1: That's what I'm saying I'm getting twenty thousand. I'm gonna
- 26:00Speaker 1: I knew you were getting that fat check. You're a
- 26:02Speaker 1: son of a bitch. Bro, No, Moontower will be fun.
- 26:06Speaker 1: It's gonna be a good time. I'm excited.
- 26:07Speaker 4: So you're going Thursday, Friday leaving Saturday.
- 26:09Speaker 1: Dude, I gotta I gotta find a hotel with a
- 26:11Speaker 1: cold plunge. Bro, I need to take my cold plunch
- 26:14Speaker 1: in the morning. Yeah, we should go to the mother Ship.
- 26:16Speaker 1: We gotta go to the mother Ship and fucking just
- 26:18Speaker 1: chill out their cold plunges. Yeah, just post up at
- 26:21Speaker 1: their cold plunge. I've been doing it every morning. I
- 26:24Speaker 1: feel so good. I feel so good every single morning
- 26:28Speaker 1: that I cold plunge. It just makes you happy. Yeah,
- 26:31Speaker 1: your blood's flowing. Yeah it doesn't.
- 26:33Speaker 4: It increase your dopamine.
- 26:34Speaker 1: My dopamine is so high right now. Yeah, me too,
- 26:37Speaker 1: do My dopamine is skyrock thing because you're cold plunging.
- 26:40Speaker 4: No Dudecause I'm waking up every morning with a with
- 26:42Speaker 4: just natural sunlight, just soaking it all in. I'm my
- 26:45Speaker 4: bed right now, it's on the uh, it's in the
- 26:48Speaker 4: living room because I well, because I I need to
- 26:51Speaker 4: play video want to play video games, I don't want
- 26:53Speaker 4: to sit on the floor, So I'm gonna put my
- 26:54Speaker 4: bed in there until I get things situated. And uh,
- 26:58Speaker 4: I have like a big window, big ass window, and.
- 27:02Speaker 1: Bay window looks out on them on the second floor.
- 27:05Speaker 4: But you gotta go down when you walk into the building,
- 27:07Speaker 4: so technically I'm like two feet above ground level. And
- 27:11Speaker 4: I woke up the first morning and there was just
- 27:12Speaker 4: people just looking directly into my apartment as I was sleeping.
- 27:16Speaker 1: Yeah, and I gotta get a curtain for that. It's
- 27:19Speaker 1: like the windows at Macy's during Christmas time. Yeah, little
- 27:23Speaker 1: kids are like pressing their face up to the glass
- 27:25Speaker 1: to see a magical nutcracker and a night train that night.
- 27:29Speaker 4: It is just illumin You can see everything in there
- 27:32Speaker 4: because you know when you turn the lights on and
- 27:33Speaker 4: it's dark out outside.
- 27:35Speaker 1: Yeah, they can see you. You can't see them everything really. Yeah,
- 27:39Speaker 1: and you didn't know that beforehand, No, I didn't think
- 27:42Speaker 1: of it.
- 27:43Speaker 4: I mean, I'm not worried about that. Like if it's that,
- 27:44Speaker 4: if that's like a living room, like, I don't care.
- 27:45Speaker 1: I people can see me playing video games. It's more
- 27:47Speaker 1: just when I'm sleeping. It's a little odd. Have you
- 27:49Speaker 1: heard people talk about the naked neighbor? Yeah, how your
- 27:52Speaker 1: neighbor you are? You're the naked neighbor. Now I have
- 27:54Speaker 1: to fucking change in the bathroom. Really, Yeah, So someone
- 27:58Speaker 1: might see your penis.
- 27:58Speaker 4: They someone will seem many people will see my penis
- 28:01Speaker 4: on the street, yes, eye level in the apartments next
- 28:06Speaker 4: to me.
- 28:07Speaker 1: Really yeah, what the fuck? What's the address? Don't worry
- 28:11Speaker 1: about it, bro, I've got to see your penis. Yeah.
- 28:16Speaker 1: It's good ship, bro, it's good, good times over there.
- 28:17Speaker 1: Made myself an egg sandwich this morning. That's fucking gross, Bro,
- 28:20Speaker 1: you're back on that shit.
- 28:22Speaker 4: I haven't had a come cooked meal on probably a
- 28:23Speaker 4: year and a half.
- 28:24Speaker 1: An egg sandwich does not count as a home cooked meal.
- 28:27Speaker 4: Yeah it does, dude, because I'm not soaking it in
- 28:28Speaker 4: salt and grease. What do you mean it's home cooked?
- 28:32Speaker 1: Brole's sodium.
- 28:33Speaker 4: Everything that you get, even if you get something healthy
- 28:35Speaker 4: from like a takeout place, it's all like soaked in
- 28:38Speaker 4: like oil and.
- 28:40Speaker 1: Salt. So, how did you do your egg like an
- 28:42Speaker 1: over easy egg? Or you did like a harmble that shit?
- 28:44Speaker 8: Bro?
- 28:45Speaker 1: I scrambled eggs.
- 28:46Speaker 4: Sam, I think I look like a fucking chef and
- 28:48Speaker 4: take that. I take that stuff and I pour it.
- 28:49Speaker 4: I pour the egg in, and I just mix it
- 28:50Speaker 4: up until it all looks like it's cooked. And then
- 28:52Speaker 4: I put it on bread, and then I.
- 28:53Speaker 1: Take one piece of bacon and I chop it up.
- 28:56Speaker 1: Did you oil the pan up first? Maybe some pam
- 28:58Speaker 1: in there?
- 28:59Speaker 4: Yeah, pamam got butter too, but not using it yet?
- 29:02Speaker 1: Why not hold enough? Holding up for something better? You
- 29:05Speaker 1: gotta let it age a little bit.
- 29:06Speaker 4: Yeah, I'm gonna save it for like if I ever
- 29:08Speaker 4: make a steak. I bought chicken, gonna I gotta make
- 29:12Speaker 4: chicken at some point, But I don't have plates.
- 29:15Speaker 1: Fuck bro, I'm gonna get you a housewarming get out
- 29:17Speaker 1: of the pants. You pick what housewarming gifts you want.
- 29:19Speaker 1: I'll give you a couple options. Okay, plates, plates is good.
- 29:23Speaker 1: Forty inch flat screen television that's like less than plates.
- 29:26Speaker 4: Rumba TVs are like free now, they just give him to.
- 29:31Speaker 1: I know, I have so many extress Yeah, I literally
- 29:33Speaker 1: have a closet full of the plates are double the
- 29:35Speaker 1: price of a TV. They spill out. Yeah, I've been eating.
- 29:38Speaker 4: My forty inch flat screen is not that big.
- 29:40Speaker 1: Forty inch. This is probably this way more than forty inch,
- 29:43Speaker 1: just about forty maybe forty five away. He's about forty.
- 29:49Speaker 1: I don't know.
- 29:49Speaker 4: I'm looking for like an eighty bro.
- 29:51Speaker 1: I just have so many though of a spare eighty.
- 29:53Speaker 1: I've been eating my my meals off eighty inches flat
- 29:55Speaker 1: screens because there's so much more accessible, Like a TV.
- 29:59Speaker 4: Was like, like, holy shit, that person has a big TV.
- 30:02Speaker 1: Yeah, it'd be three thousand dollars.
- 30:04Speaker 4: Yeah, we had two TVs. We had a TV and
- 30:07Speaker 4: then a mounted TV next to it.
- 30:09Speaker 5: We got a third under my bed.
- 30:10Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, and you still somehow were watching off of
- 30:13Speaker 1: like an etcher sketch.
- 30:15Speaker 4: Dude, I like my TV. Say what you want about it.
- 30:17Speaker 1: I like it. Your boys were like explaining to you
- 30:19Speaker 1: what was going on in war zone. Ou No, like
- 30:22Speaker 1: you're a blind person.
- 30:23Speaker 4: They're fucked because they play from they play on big TVs,
- 30:26Speaker 4: not not nearly as fast frames per second as I have.
- 30:30Speaker 4: I'm at like a thousand frames per second and they're
- 30:31Speaker 4: at like twenty.
- 30:32Speaker 1: That's why you're so fucking nice with it.
- 30:35Speaker 4: It's a lot of wins yesterday, Yeah, solid session yesterday.
- 30:39Speaker 1: You're neglecting your family life, brother, now.
- 30:42Speaker 4: Actually I even FaceTime to my mother, my sisters, and
- 30:44Speaker 4: my grandma separately.
- 30:46Speaker 1: Because it was Easter. Yeah, did they send you an
- 30:48Speaker 1: Easter basket?
- 30:49Speaker 3: No?
- 30:50Speaker 1: I bet they did. I know they didn't. Probably just
- 30:53Speaker 1: didn't get there yet. They didn't. Probably waiting for you
- 30:55Speaker 1: back at home. Nope, it's probably waiting for you back
- 30:57Speaker 1: in Swampscott where you're from. Swam Scott. Now that ain't me.
- 31:06Speaker 1: Let us talk about to get.
- 31:08Speaker 9: Golf season is in full swing and getting out there
- 31:10Speaker 9: to work on your game is bound to make any
- 31:12Speaker 9: day even better. And if you're looking to improve your drive,
- 31:16Speaker 9: Chevy Equinox EV is the smartest choice you can make.
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- 31:36Speaker 1: I uh, you do anything for Easter? You're like a
- 31:39Speaker 1: religious dude. You go to church? Yeah, I went to church.
- 31:43Speaker 4: Praise the Lord he has risen, for he has risen.
- 31:46Speaker 1: Christ has died, Christ has risen. Christ's come again.
- 31:49Speaker 4: Were you all sitting in your Brooklyn apartment holding hands
- 31:51Speaker 4: shaking easier.
- 31:55Speaker 1: He has risen. They had a fucking baptism at the church,
- 32:00Speaker 1: really grown men getting baptized. Oh yeah.
- 32:02Speaker 4: When they dunk him in the beach, it was it
- 32:05Speaker 4: can they do the beach or do they do a pool.
- 32:07Speaker 1: They didn't even dunk him fully. They just had like
- 32:08Speaker 1: a little bucket of water. But like they were supposed
- 32:10Speaker 1: to be a well grown man getting the bucket of water.
- 32:12Speaker 1: You want to be in the beach. Yeah, should have
- 32:14Speaker 1: fully dunked him. Yeah, but they were like, uh, these
- 32:17Speaker 1: are like you actually went to cheer, You actually went
- 32:19Speaker 1: to church. I went to church yesterday on Saturday night. Damn.
- 32:22Speaker 1: See I told you were a religious guy. Of course. Sorry,
- 32:24Speaker 1: I don't mean to offend you with my he has
- 32:26Speaker 1: risen joke. I made the joke. No, I made it first,
- 32:28Speaker 1: and I made it way funnier than you did. God
- 32:30Speaker 1: takes joying what we take joy in, So if you
- 32:32Speaker 1: have a you make fun of the Lord, and God
- 32:34Speaker 1: would not take joy killing the enemy like I do
- 32:37Speaker 1: in war zone. You're just laughing with your blood blust.
- 32:42Speaker 3: Yeah.
- 32:43Speaker 4: I got a sign from my apartment. It says, uh,
- 32:46Speaker 4: please knock gamer inside. He bites he's vicious.
- 32:54Speaker 1: Bites. I'm going to get a door mat too. That's
- 32:57Speaker 1: one of the most cringelys. Gamer on the loose and
- 33:02Speaker 1: throwing back in the back of your U haul. Gamer
- 33:05Speaker 1: on board on board drive, careful knock a couple of times.
- 33:13Speaker 1: He's probably gaming. Please curb your gamer. Excuse my language.
- 33:19Speaker 1: He's a gamer, live laugh game. Yeah.
- 33:22Speaker 4: I do got to tone down my language when I'm gaming, though,
- 33:24Speaker 4: because I realized that my neighbors can probably hear me
- 33:27Speaker 4: and I'm just yelling yeah.
- 33:28Speaker 1: The people on the street. People on the street can
- 33:31Speaker 1: hear me. Yeah, it's like t RL. They're like surrounding your.
- 33:33Speaker 4: Hors happening in that be in that room.
- 33:36Speaker 1: They think it's domestic abuse. I gotta get ot a
- 33:38Speaker 1: doormat that says that. I know you have one already.
- 33:43Speaker 1: I'm gonna make a custom one. What should it say?
- 33:47Speaker 1: I am gay? Oh that wouldn't make sense. No, it
- 33:50Speaker 1: would make perfect sense. How else did you get pink?
- 33:52Speaker 1: I if you weren't eating a male pink? You have
- 33:54Speaker 1: the pinkest I've ever seen, do I really? Yes? It's
- 33:57Speaker 1: so pink. You keep on touching it, and you keep
- 33:59Speaker 1: on touching.
- 33:59Speaker 4: The I popped a blood vessel.
- 34:01Speaker 1: It's not pink eyes on eating a man's ass when
- 34:04Speaker 1: a man farted as you ate his ass. I actually
- 34:07Speaker 1: saw that guy's ass when you were fucking point blank
- 34:11Speaker 1: at it, when you were one centimeter away. You see
- 34:14Speaker 1: what I see.
- 34:15Speaker 4: It's really not that bad. I've had pinky. You'd know
- 34:17Speaker 4: if I had pink.
- 34:18Speaker 1: It's crusting over right now. You have a fucking deep
- 34:22Speaker 1: puss fucking seeping from your eye like sewage. It looks
- 34:25Speaker 1: like Ghostbusters, looks like a primordial ooze, looks like the
- 34:29Speaker 1: LaBrea tar pits fucking seeping out of your eye.
- 34:33Speaker 4: Pinky's rough, no ship brow. Suddenly it feels itchy.
- 34:37Speaker 1: You've been touching it so much and you keep on
- 34:40Speaker 1: readjusting the microphone. Woe betide the fucking next people that
- 34:44Speaker 1: come in here and have to fucking sit in the vicinity.
- 34:47Speaker 1: If you're conjunctivet is you bro it left a film?
- 34:54Speaker 1: Why did that leave fucking a splatter pattern? Yeah, he's
- 34:58Speaker 1: go bearing right now, dude. That's how COVID literally started. Yeah,
- 35:06Speaker 1: it looked like after two people kissed like this.
- 35:08Speaker 4: String gross, dude, it's so disgusting, dude, do not have
- 35:12Speaker 4: pink eye?
- 35:13Speaker 1: How do you know I got sleepy eyes. I'm sleepy
- 35:17Speaker 1: because they're crusting shut because of the pink.
- 35:19Speaker 4: This is what happens when you play so much fucking
- 35:21Speaker 4: video games, bro.
- 35:22Speaker 1: Yeah, and you fucking don't take time to ship, so
- 35:24Speaker 1: you're just fucking.
- 35:25Speaker 4: It's called a gamer eye, dumping your.
- 35:27Speaker 1: Pants while you fucking dump clips out. What's your best
- 35:31Speaker 1: gun in these days? Beware gamer inside. Beware a gamer
- 35:36Speaker 1: who has not fucking cleaned his ass.
- 35:38Speaker 4: Beware of the stench of gamers inside.
- 35:41Speaker 1: He fucking goes to bed with an itchy buttole and
- 35:43Speaker 1: wakes up with sticky fingers bum and goes to bed
- 35:46Speaker 1: the next Actually, uh, place is.
- 35:47Speaker 4: Pretty clean, got u. I accidentally ordered a twenty four
- 35:51Speaker 4: pack of paper towels and toilet paper, so I will
- 35:55Speaker 4: probably be a year before I need more paper towels
- 35:58Speaker 4: and toilet paper.
- 35:59Speaker 1: That's probably for the though, because you probably run out
- 36:01Speaker 1: and go a year without buying any new shit. You're
- 36:04Speaker 1: just using, Like, I don't think that would happen.
- 36:07Speaker 4: What else did I get? I got a bunch of soap.
- 36:09Speaker 4: I got like a twelve pack of soap, so we're
- 36:12Speaker 4: soapd up.
- 36:13Speaker 1: I'm gonna buy you a candle, bro I.
- 36:15Speaker 4: Could use a candle or maybe some lamps, some lights.
- 36:18Speaker 1: I got it.
- 36:19Speaker 4: I was just gonna I just gotta buy like any
- 36:21Speaker 4: trash bags. Definitely need trash bags. Definitely need trash boxes
- 36:24Speaker 4: are kind of be you as being used as trash bags.
- 36:26Speaker 1: And you can't recycle the ship that's inside the boxes,
- 36:28Speaker 1: but you have to recycle the boxes. Luckily, it's New York.
- 36:31Speaker 1: You could just whip the shit outide.
- 36:33Speaker 4: Yeah, all it on the ground. It's so funny. That's
- 36:37Speaker 4: that's actually what you're supposed to do, Like just leave
- 36:40Speaker 4: it outside.
- 36:40Speaker 1: Yeah, someone will come get it. Yeah. When I lived
- 36:44Speaker 1: in La, they would like sort your recycling for you. Yeah,
- 36:47Speaker 1: and then in New York, the best I'll just like
- 36:49Speaker 1: I would like leave clothes outside, Like if I was
- 36:52Speaker 1: just done with clothes, I would just leave them stacked
- 36:55Speaker 1: and folded, like right outside of my apartment on top
- 36:57Speaker 1: of the recycling bin, and like within five minutes, so
- 37:00Speaker 1: would have just taken all of that. Yeah, people take everything,
- 37:02Speaker 1: just wearing them down the streets. It's awesome. One man's
- 37:06Speaker 1: trash is another man's come up. As the boy Macklemore said,
- 37:10Speaker 1: Macklamore Mackamore said, come up, bro, he's a genius. Huh
- 37:13Speaker 1: he said he's a genius. Yeah he is. Have you
- 37:15Speaker 1: heard ye say treasure? Yeah, and he said come up instead.
- 37:18Speaker 1: It's a little turn of phrase. That's how Hobo Johnson
- 37:22Speaker 1: got a start. You could see every time you listen
- 37:24Speaker 1: to Hobo Johnson that he's just a Macklemore influence. Yeah,
- 37:26Speaker 1: you could feel the Macklemore influence.
- 37:28Speaker 4: Eh, Goats take after goats.
- 37:30Speaker 1: Yeah. Mac Miller took after Hobo Johnson.
- 37:34Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, big time.
- 37:36Speaker 1: I know that's your fave Mac.
- 37:38Speaker 4: Yeah, well I call him Malcolm. I know you definitely
- 37:42Speaker 4: did call him Malcolm McCormick.
- 37:43Speaker 2: Bro.
- 37:44Speaker 1: Yeah, did you say his name was though, Mac Miller.
- 37:48Speaker 4: Shit, I haven't heard that name in a while, Dude.
- 37:50Speaker 1: I go by his old block and fucking Dumbo every
- 37:53Speaker 1: other weekend, just to see how where he used to live, Bro,
- 37:55Speaker 1: just to walk the streets that he used to walk.
- 37:57Speaker 1: I'm sure you've never gone on the Matt Miller tour, Yeah, Bro,
- 38:00Speaker 1: I have. I just called Matt Miller. You don't know
- 38:03Speaker 1: what the fuck you're talking about. Matt. Yeah, we used
- 38:06Speaker 1: to call him that all the time.
- 38:11Speaker 4: Oh Man, For a second, I thought you were in
- 38:12Speaker 4: the loop.
- 38:13Speaker 1: No, I thought you were in the loop. You don't
- 38:15Speaker 1: know shit about his song about going to heaven and stuff.
- 38:18Speaker 1: I'm a big Malcolm fan, so what did you say?
- 38:20Speaker 1: Heaven was? Like Christopher Wallace fan, you know, Chris from
- 38:23Speaker 1: Betstye The livest One. It's so funny when you see
- 38:28Speaker 1: dudes who are like, uh, what's your favorite neighborhood in
- 38:32Speaker 1: New York and people are like Bedsty The livest One.
- 38:35Speaker 1: But it's like this, like fucking white dude who moved
- 38:39Speaker 1: here from somewhere else. It's just funny to hear people
- 38:44Speaker 1: like claim Betsty like it's like biggies ye, Like it's
- 38:47Speaker 1: like super thorough yeah, as if it hasn't been completely
- 38:50Speaker 1: changed over.
- 38:50Speaker 4: Oh yeah, that's like people always talk about like Southeya
- 38:52Speaker 4: of Boston like that. They're like, oh, that's like we're like,
- 38:55Speaker 4: uh like good Will hunting and shit, Like, No, southe
- 38:58Speaker 4: is like the nicest part of Boston.
- 39:00Speaker 1: No, yeah, or one of them bedsticks.
- 39:02Speaker 4: Where like college kids live right yeah.
- 39:04Speaker 1: Yeah, like the whole food ceo lives Yeah like that. Yeah,
- 39:09Speaker 1: like the Etsy offices are in Bedstye.
- 39:11Speaker 4: Shit, dude, have you seen the uh listen, have you
- 39:16Speaker 4: seen these new men on the street trends that are
- 39:18Speaker 4: like these are the worst ones yet. They go around
- 39:22Speaker 4: and they go how old are you and it's like
- 39:24Speaker 4: a little kid and he'll be like, oh, I'm I'm
- 39:26Speaker 4: fifty seven and they're like, okay, I'll buy you something
- 39:28Speaker 4: for fifty seven dollars in the mall. They're always in
- 39:31Speaker 4: the mall. And then they go, oh, and by the way,
- 39:33Speaker 4: do you follow me on Instagram? It's Adam Farone and
- 39:36Speaker 4: they're like, oh shit, yeah, actually I do follow you
- 39:38Speaker 4: on Instagram, Like all right, it's extra twenty dollars. Or
- 39:40Speaker 4: they'll be like, hey, I'll buy you something at the
- 39:42Speaker 4: mall of you if you follow me on Instagram and
- 39:44Speaker 4: then like, oh my god, I do follow you on Instagram.
- 39:47Speaker 1: You have seen these?
- 39:48Speaker 4: No, oh dude, I went through a big kick of
- 39:50Speaker 4: those last night and I was just furious.
- 39:52Speaker 1: Yeah, those sound infuriating. The ones that have been pissing
- 39:56Speaker 1: me off recently are guys who will like be like, hey, like,
- 39:59Speaker 1: have you and your kids ever been to wrestling before? Oh? Yeah,
- 40:03Speaker 1: they're not even going to wrestling.
- 40:05Speaker 4: Yeah yeah, they're always Mexican. Yeah, they're always Mexican.
- 40:08Speaker 1: But they're always so staged or it's just like.
- 40:11Speaker 4: Yeah, and they're like, well, guess where you're going.
- 40:12Speaker 1: Tonight, Thanks mister the last.
- 40:15Speaker 4: Row of WrestleMania bringing some binoculars and maybe you'll be
- 40:19Speaker 4: able to see.
- 40:21Speaker 1: But they do always wind up like meeting somebody, like
- 40:23Speaker 1: they always wind up meeting the worst wrestler. Yeah, we're
- 40:26Speaker 1: going to introduce you to some wrestlers. It's like the
- 40:31Speaker 1: like fourth woman on the roster and yeah, that shit
- 40:34Speaker 1: isn't saying.
- 40:34Speaker 4: I don't understand the people that watch those two and
- 40:36Speaker 4: are like, oh my god, this is so amazing.
- 40:38Speaker 1: No it's not. It's disgusting. I like when they brought
- 40:42Speaker 1: like a really, I.
- 40:42Speaker 4: Can't afford wrestling tickets, you shouldn't be there.
- 40:44Speaker 1: Yeah, they give them away. Have you ever been to
- 40:48Speaker 1: a wrestling thing? Uh? Yeah, WrestleMania went not WrestleMania. I
- 40:51Speaker 1: went to All In All you've never been to All
- 40:56Speaker 1: In But it wasn't in Chicago. I went for a
- 40:58Speaker 1: bachelor party. It was fun. You wouldn't know what to
- 41:00Speaker 1: do with a bachelor party. What would you do? I
- 41:04Speaker 1: don't know what would you do? I don't know, yes,
- 41:06Speaker 1: exactly who would you even talk to I don't know.
- 41:08Speaker 4: I don't know I would I don't know any Would you.
- 41:10Speaker 1: Talk to anybody? Would you bring anything you don't Well,
- 41:12Speaker 1: you're supposed to bring something, I don't know. You chop
- 41:15Speaker 1: empty handed. I guess so, fucking rookie ship I gotta
- 41:20Speaker 1: show you the ropes.
- 41:21Speaker 3: Kid.
- 41:22Speaker 1: I came to your I came to the stand the
- 41:24Speaker 1: other night. Yeah, you were ship faced. I lost my wallet, Francis,
- 41:30Speaker 1: could you have me find my wallet? Fucking embarrassing me.
- 41:35Speaker 1: I got as drunk as you for your birthday. No,
- 41:37Speaker 1: you got way more drunk than me. I was sober,
- 41:40Speaker 1: and you were going up on stage with no idea
- 41:42Speaker 1: how drunk you were. I thought we were gonna play
- 41:45Speaker 1: pooh me.
- 41:49Speaker 4: I thought we're gonna You guys abandoned me on my
- 41:52Speaker 4: birthday because the clock I went, I went to go
- 41:55Speaker 4: to the bathroom. When I came back and you're gone,
- 41:56Speaker 4: and you're like, we couldn't find you. Do we have
- 41:58Speaker 4: no idea where you went?
- 42:00Speaker 1: Because you were and you were the one that wanted
- 42:01Speaker 1: to play pool.
- 42:02Speaker 4: You're like, I think we go play a little pool
- 42:03Speaker 4: after this, And I was like, I guess I just
- 42:05Speaker 4: want to go home, to be honest, but since we
- 42:07Speaker 4: got to celebrate your guys, it seems like it's your
- 42:08Speaker 4: birthday on my bi We're gonna play billiards. And then
- 42:11Speaker 4: I got back from the bathroom and you're gone, come back,
- 42:14Speaker 4: and then I'm just stuck there.
- 42:16Speaker 1: Me and Francis went went out for fucking four hours after.
- 42:19Speaker 4: That, fine by me. I went home and slept like
- 42:21Speaker 4: a baby.
- 42:21Speaker 1: We went to the Skull and Bones and fucking read Shakespeare. Yeah,
- 42:26Speaker 1: we fucking exchange our thoughts on literature.
- 42:28Speaker 4: It was insane that you guys like I didn't care
- 42:31Speaker 4: that you guys left. It was insane that you were
- 42:32Speaker 4: acting like I was gone for a long time. You
- 42:34Speaker 4: were going for he didn't went to the bathroom.
- 42:36Speaker 1: And came back. You were going for so long, and
- 42:38Speaker 1: I was like, oh, I wonder where they went. And
- 42:39Speaker 1: then like twenty minutes passed and I was like, what
- 42:41Speaker 1: the fuck I did? Get absolutely toasted there. You were hammered. Yeah,
- 42:45Speaker 1: that's why I fucking left, bro.
- 42:47Speaker 4: It was probably for the best. They were gonna kick
- 42:48Speaker 4: you out. I talked to the manager that I was like, yeah,
- 42:50Speaker 4: I'm out of here.
- 42:52Speaker 1: They were gonna kick you out because you kept on
- 42:54Speaker 1: going back on stage to do your comedy when it
- 42:56Speaker 1: was your turn. You're like wrestled the mic from O
- 43:00Speaker 1: Gosh sing Hope was it cosh there? Of course it's
- 43:04Speaker 1: always there, that bastard.
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- 45:02Speaker 1: I fucking love that guy. Yeah right, that's not what
- 45:05Speaker 1: you were saying. You were talking a lot of shit.
- 45:08Speaker 1: I've never talk shit. You and Benedict PULIZZI were fucking destroying.
- 45:12Speaker 4: In appearance from my B day that day present I
- 45:15Speaker 4: could ask for.
- 45:16Speaker 1: It was Sickliz, he was there? Who else was there?
- 45:20Speaker 1: All the wine? It's a wine guy.
- 45:22Speaker 2: Was he?
- 45:22Speaker 1: Yeah. I literally don't remember the conversations I had with anybody.
- 45:26Speaker 1: I don't remember either. I was bummed you went. I
- 45:30Speaker 1: was just super tired. Yeah, I was too. That's why
- 45:33Speaker 1: I had to get out of there. I wanted to
- 45:34Speaker 1: hang out. I was pretty I was pretty pumped that
- 45:36Speaker 1: you guys left. I was like, oh fuck, yeah, we're
- 45:38Speaker 1: going home. Yeah, yeah, because we were playing this stay out,
- 45:40Speaker 1: but I had to get out of there.
- 45:42Speaker 4: Yeah, and you were. I honestly was surprised that you
- 45:43Speaker 4: stayed for so long. I thought you were gonna just leave.
- 45:45Speaker 1: I know, but I was just trying to be a
- 45:46Speaker 1: good friend. We were drinking for like ten hours, and
- 45:49Speaker 1: I was in a support of good friend. Yeah. It
- 45:50Speaker 1: was fun. You're like, you're you're drunk, but then in
- 45:53Speaker 1: the same breath you'll be like, you don't even drink.
- 45:55Speaker 1: He's like, bro, you can't have it both called bullying.
- 45:57Speaker 1: You can't have it both ways.
- 45:58Speaker 4: Called I was bullying you and it worked. And then
- 46:02Speaker 4: you went to go get like a vape and run.
- 46:04Speaker 4: Comes back forty five minutes later and he's like, didn't
- 46:06Speaker 4: have my wallet. I don't know where you were got lost.
- 46:11Speaker 4: I went walked out on a search party for you.
- 46:13Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah, A bunch of comics were like walking through
- 46:17Speaker 1: the fucking Washington Square Park shuffling their feet to see
- 46:21Speaker 1: if they could find my dead body, like a bunch
- 46:24Speaker 1: of archers. When you lose one of your arrows. I
- 46:25Speaker 1: know you've never gone shooting arrows before, but that's what
- 46:27Speaker 1: it's like. I have it.
- 46:28Speaker 4: Maybe we'll go shooting in Austin arrows bullets.
- 46:32Speaker 1: No, I want to shoot arrows. I want to shoot
- 46:34Speaker 1: my crossbow. I'm gonna bring my long bow down there.
- 46:37Speaker 1: I'm gonna check my long bow for two days. I'm
- 46:41Speaker 1: gonna have my fucking elk hunting bow.
- 46:44Speaker 4: I just got. I just got a fishing rod. He did, yeah,
- 46:46Speaker 4: fly fishing fly.
- 46:47Speaker 1: Yeah. You're not gonna bring it to the Iceland, are you. Yeah,
- 46:50Speaker 1: that's why I got it, dude. You're gonna bring it care.
- 46:53Speaker 4: Literally just doing a fishing trip. That's what it's turned into.
- 46:56Speaker 1: That's hilarious. Six days out in the lakes out in
- 46:59Speaker 1: the river. You're going for six days now. I thought
- 47:01Speaker 1: it was four, not six. You keep on attacking on
- 47:03Speaker 1: the day second to the eighth. Your eye is getting
- 47:05Speaker 1: so getting redder. Yeah, it's getting more red. And the
- 47:08Speaker 1: microphone is getting red too. Oh it's starting to feel
- 47:11Speaker 1: like heavy and itchy. The microphone is starting. I literally
- 47:14Speaker 1: have not.
- 47:15Speaker 4: Thought about it once the entire day, and now all
- 47:17Speaker 4: of a sudden, I'm no, dude, it's.
- 47:21Speaker 1: It's very fine.
- 47:23Speaker 4: It's red on the inside, which is where the vessel
- 47:25Speaker 4: has been bursted. You've never burst a vessel before.
- 47:29Speaker 2: What?
- 47:30Speaker 1: Just like scratching your eye?
- 47:32Speaker 5: Why are you scratching?
- 47:34Speaker 1: I don't know. I do that all the time. And
- 47:35Speaker 1: then you wake up and yeah, but after you touch
- 47:37Speaker 1: your buttole, that means that there are I don't.
- 47:38Speaker 4: Touch my butthole, Yes you do.
- 47:40Speaker 1: No, I don't even in the shower. Yeah, even in
- 47:42Speaker 1: the shower. Oh so you have a dirty butthole, dirty ass. Yeah,
- 47:45Speaker 1: that's gross. That's probably how you're getting fucking filickula all
- 47:48Speaker 1: over the place.
- 47:48Speaker 4: I touched my toes and I and I spread my cheeks.
- 47:51Speaker 4: Let the water do the work. I take a I
- 47:55Speaker 4: take a I take a bar of soap and I
- 47:56Speaker 4: put it in between my ass cheeks and then I
- 47:58Speaker 4: bend over.
- 47:59Speaker 5: It makes sense. There's him, princess.
- 48:03Speaker 1: Thoughts almost fucking yeah, it's really just in the four
- 48:07Speaker 1: point stance. Yeah, and like in the asshole cleaned, welcome
- 48:11Speaker 1: some fucking heat and well you need to switch over
- 48:13Speaker 1: to is some cold water, bro that'll get you feeling happy,
- 48:16Speaker 1: that'll get the dopamine flowing. I would never do that.
- 48:20Speaker 1: I don't.
- 48:20Speaker 4: I think I get the same amount of dopamine that
- 48:22Speaker 4: I get from taking a nice, warm shower, that way
- 48:24Speaker 4: more dopamine than I would be getting from taking a
- 48:26Speaker 4: painful cold shower.
- 48:27Speaker 1: You don't even know what dopamine is. That's easy dopamine.
- 48:30Speaker 1: You don't want easy dopamine. That's how you get depressed.
- 48:32Speaker 1: You know. It's the hardest thing that you're gonna do
- 48:34Speaker 1: all day is when I'm fucking sitting in my not
- 48:37Speaker 1: even close three headed shower using my loofah and some
- 48:41Speaker 1: very expensive shampoo.
- 48:42Speaker 4: I gotta go to home deepot after this and build shit.
- 48:44Speaker 4: That's gonna be way harder than sitting in a cold shower.
- 48:47Speaker 1: No, it's not. You think I brought out the blue
- 48:49Speaker 1: jeans for nothing. What are you about to build?
- 48:51Speaker 4: Building a desk? A building a desk from scratch?
- 48:56Speaker 1: Just ordered wood?
- 48:58Speaker 4: Yeah, I ordered wood and steel.
- 49:00Speaker 1: What kind of wood? Just wood?
- 49:02Speaker 4: Looked up wood and I hit purchase. It's just a tree.
- 49:05Speaker 4: I gotta like shave it down and everything.
- 49:08Speaker 1: You're not equipped to do that. Yeah, you don't have
- 49:10Speaker 1: the fucking manly instincts. You don't have to know how.
- 49:15Speaker 1: You don't know phrases like I measured twice hours pretty hard. No,
- 49:18Speaker 1: it's really hard, and it makes you feel really good.
- 49:20Speaker 4: In between this and my shows tonight, I gotta go
- 49:22Speaker 4: build shit.
- 49:24Speaker 1: Yeah right, dude, Yeah, what shows do you have? Ten fifty?
- 49:28Speaker 1: How long you're doing five minutes, how long you've been
- 49:32Speaker 1: doing coffee, or how long you've been doing stand up
- 49:35Speaker 1: ten years exactly doing the same fifteen minutes. Bro, Now
- 49:39Speaker 1: I'm doing fifteen minutes and I'm doing new stuff. Yeah,
- 49:41Speaker 1: that shit's not fucking hard. It's not.
- 49:44Speaker 4: I know.
- 49:44Speaker 1: That's how because you could do it as drunk as
- 49:46Speaker 1: you were.
- 49:47Speaker 4: I was not drunk, dude. I was actually purposely not
- 49:49Speaker 4: getting drunk because I got to go up tonight.
- 49:51Speaker 1: Dude. We went and we're like.
- 49:53Speaker 4: I got to go up tonight and literally put on
- 49:55Speaker 4: a masterclass on stage.
- 49:56Speaker 1: We were slamming cocktails.
- 49:58Speaker 4: I apologize to the weight staff because of how hard
- 50:00Speaker 4: people are laughing and they're all spilling drinks everywhere. No,
- 50:03Speaker 4: you fucking I make sure you guys tip the weight
- 50:05Speaker 4: staff because of what just happened up here.
- 50:07Speaker 1: You impishly hid my walle Tornado went off in the
- 50:09Speaker 1: in the in the room, you fucking like stuff my
- 50:12Speaker 1: wallet between two fucking couch cushions. That shit wasn't fucking funny.
- 50:16Speaker 3: Brow.
- 50:16Speaker 4: Do you lose your wallets? Keep it in the fucking
- 50:18Speaker 4: pack at the back of your blue jeans.
- 50:20Speaker 3: Bro.
- 50:20Speaker 4: You can barely even get it out if I want to.
- 50:22Speaker 1: Yeah, you're gonna get sciatica because you got your wallet
- 50:24Speaker 1: in your fucking blue jeans.
- 50:26Speaker 4: I'm sure those I'm sure that things are just slipping
- 50:28Speaker 4: out of those little gay ass pants.
- 50:31Speaker 1: Yeah, Bro, I said it. These are karate pants. Bro,
- 50:34Speaker 1: the fucking roundhouse. Kick your ass.
- 50:36Speaker 3: Bro.
- 50:37Speaker 1: These are chef's pants. Oh man, just good. Just get
- 50:40Speaker 1: a little stretching. Those jeans, don't stretch.
- 50:43Speaker 4: Yeah, these are stretching jeans.
- 50:44Speaker 1: There's no way that there's an ounce of elastic built
- 50:46Speaker 1: into those. Yeah feeling, bro, take a pull at them.
- 50:49Speaker 1: You got a pull pull?
- 50:51Speaker 4: Yeah, those aren't stretching, would stretch, yeah, right, bro, and
- 50:55Speaker 4: my blue jeans.
- 50:56Speaker 1: Pass those down to your ancestors. You could get buried
- 50:58Speaker 1: in those bitches. Yeah.
- 51:00Speaker 4: Well they're Japanese denim. This things last forever. You're not
- 51:03Speaker 4: supposed to wash these. You put them in the freezer
- 51:06Speaker 4: to wash.
- 51:06Speaker 1: Them kind of like rebuilds their character. It does give
- 51:09Speaker 1: them good character, that old Japanese Navy.
- 51:12Speaker 3: Yeah.
- 51:12Speaker 4: I've been sleeping and I'm honestly because for some reason,
- 51:15Speaker 4: when I wake up after I've slept in my blue jeans,
- 51:17Speaker 4: I just have like an I haven't urged to work
- 51:19Speaker 4: and build.
- 51:19Speaker 1: You just get out building.
- 51:21Speaker 4: Yeah, I've been volunteering at construction sites and they see
- 51:24Speaker 4: the jeans and they go, this guy knows what he's doing.
- 51:25Speaker 4: This guy knows how to handle power tools. That's probably
- 51:28Speaker 4: why they they offered me the twenty six footer at
- 51:30Speaker 4: U Haul because I was wearing the blue jeans, right,
- 51:32Speaker 4: So that's a guy that knows his way around a
- 51:33Speaker 4: twenty six footer.
- 51:34Speaker 1: You're in the front yard of the home depot. Yeah,
- 51:37Speaker 1: with some of your South American home. He Yeah, some
- 51:39Speaker 1: of your Central American boys looking for trabajo.
- 51:43Speaker 4: Yeah, you pick up the trabajo medellos after this, after
- 51:47Speaker 4: we clock out and.
- 51:48Speaker 1: Have like the best lunch ever. Yeah, the most delicious.
- 51:52Speaker 4: Get a couple of hogies and some medellos.
- 51:54Speaker 1: No, bro, those dudes are not having hogies. They were
- 51:56Speaker 1: having like fucking some beautiful enchiladas, that che easiest enchiladas,
- 52:01Speaker 1: that fucking with cheese that pulls apart, like your pink
- 52:03Speaker 1: eye touching a microphone. Dude, it's not pink eye, bro,
- 52:06Speaker 1: it is pink pink. I can smell it.
- 52:10Speaker 4: You'd be lucky I smell it.
- 52:11Speaker 1: No, I swear to God, I fucking smell it.
- 52:14Speaker 4: You can't smell pink eye. I can bacterial infections.
- 52:18Speaker 1: I can. It's like a dog that can smell cancer.
- 52:21Speaker 1: I can smell the pink eye on you smell cancer.
- 52:23Speaker 1: There are some dogs that can do it. Yeah, can
- 52:27Speaker 1: they smell?
- 52:28Speaker 5: Man?
- 52:29Speaker 4: From a mile away, you can probably see one.
- 52:34Speaker 1: All you gotta look as for is the blue jeans.
- 52:37Speaker 1: Blue jean baby sing it elllyly seems just full of
- 52:45Speaker 1: the band.
- 52:47Speaker 4: See, no one's singing that about those pants. You never
- 52:50Speaker 4: hear a song.
- 52:50Speaker 1: Called white Jean Baby. What bro, those jeans give them
- 52:55Speaker 1: a pullo, do not stretch?
- 52:58Speaker 4: See these these are the kind of those are like
- 53:00Speaker 4: the pants that I was that kids would wear in
- 53:01Speaker 4: my town growing up for their like senior pictures, and
- 53:03Speaker 4: they'd be like spread out on a beach with flip
- 53:06Speaker 4: flops on us like an unbuttoned like like an unbuttoned shirt.
- 53:10Speaker 1: Yeah, or with their family.
- 53:12Speaker 3: Yeah.
- 53:12Speaker 1: Vieneyard vines in the background, Vindardvin' logos everywhere. So happy
- 53:18Speaker 1: to be graduating? These are? These are a pair of pants.
- 53:21Speaker 4: That you go, I'm going to the fucking military. I'm
- 53:23Speaker 4: not even graduating. I got my ged I'm going to
- 53:27Speaker 4: trade school, learn how to fix shit.
- 53:29Speaker 1: No, bro, those are those?
- 53:30Speaker 2: Are?
- 53:30Speaker 1: Those are I'm going over to Penn State to have
- 53:32Speaker 1: fun for four years?
- 53:33Speaker 2: No?
- 53:33Speaker 1: These are I thrifted those pants, and then I gave
- 53:36Speaker 1: them back to the thrift store, and then I thrifted
- 53:38Speaker 1: the same pair of pants from their thrift store for
- 53:41Speaker 1: more money. I know you keep on buying, you know,
- 53:44Speaker 1: thrift Old Navy. These remind me of my old jeans
- 53:46Speaker 1: that I used to have.
- 53:47Speaker 4: You go to Old Navy and you get you get
- 53:48Speaker 4: genuine Japanese leather, Japanese denim, my bed.
- 53:52Speaker 1: Yeah right, their pants too old navy for the night out.
- 53:55Speaker 5: They're pretty proud that everything's made in America.
- 53:57Speaker 1: Yeah, they love that it's made in America. And you
- 53:59Speaker 1: can tell because it shit quality. For menu, if it
- 54:01Speaker 1: rains on those.
- 54:03Speaker 4: Where the Japanese denim, no, bro, yeah, if someone sneezes
- 54:07Speaker 4: on them. I got my like, I got like, I
- 54:08Speaker 4: got on like an American outfit right now. I got
- 54:10Speaker 4: my converse, my blue jeans and my polo jacket, my
- 54:13Speaker 4: Japanese blue jeans and my polo jackets from European beanie.
- 54:17Speaker 1: This is all.
- 54:18Speaker 4: This is America. This is how God intended a man.
- 54:20Speaker 1: And that's how you could tell it's gonna fall apart
- 54:22Speaker 1: and just a devil intended a man to dress. No,
- 54:24Speaker 1: this is all. This is all fucking made in Europe
- 54:27Speaker 1: from a sweatshop or a fucking Asian in a sweatshop. Bro,
- 54:30Speaker 1: not these, This is stitched these myself. This is well made.
- 54:33Speaker 1: This shit is gonna last. Nike sweatshop, oh uh, Abercrombie
- 54:38Speaker 1: definitely sweatshop.
- 54:39Speaker 4: Yeah, some kids worked hard on that fit. Yeah, I'm
- 54:42Speaker 4: saying for one cent a year heavy slot.
- 54:45Speaker 1: I wonder if in the Nike movie they talk about
- 54:48Speaker 1: the sweatshops do they really what do they say?
- 54:51Speaker 5: Bateman brings it up, and then Matt Dane's like, ah.
- 54:54Speaker 1: Yeah, of course, yeah, and that was it. We all. Yeah.
- 54:57Speaker 1: In the book he brings it up and my daughter
- 54:59Speaker 1: told me, are bad. I don't really know if I
- 55:01Speaker 1: believe it. I used to use sweatshops all the time.
- 55:06Speaker 4: I didn't know it was bad until my daughter told
- 55:07Speaker 4: me at dinner, you got stuck the sweatshops.
- 55:09Speaker 1: I would kill kids all the time. I didn't know
- 55:12Speaker 1: it was bad fundamentally. In the book, they're like Phil
- 55:16Speaker 1: Knight is basically like, yeah, we use sweatshops, but they
- 55:18Speaker 1: were like the highest conditioned sweatshops. Oh yeah, they were
- 55:22Speaker 1: the best sweatshops in all of all of Asia.
- 55:24Speaker 4: Yeah, you don't get Nike without some top tier Asians
- 55:26Speaker 4: working behind it.
- 55:27Speaker 1: Right, they were the best kids. They had all the
- 55:31Speaker 1: other kids killed to your children. Yeah, they weeded the
- 55:34Speaker 1: best kids.
- 55:34Speaker 4: If we got the best kids in Asia working on
- 55:36Speaker 4: these Nikes.
- 55:37Speaker 1: That's what squid Games was, you're paying faced on. Yeah,
- 55:39Speaker 1: the one kid that made it to the end earned
- 55:41Speaker 1: the right to work in Phil Knight's Sweatshop Sewing Together,
- 55:45Speaker 1: some Dunks, some seventy seven Blazers, seventy seven Blazers us
- 55:50Speaker 1: sick mind.
- 55:51Speaker 4: Bro, No, that was not a record that that was you.
- 55:54Speaker 1: It's not even like that.
- 55:55Speaker 4: I was just trying to go along, So I felt
- 55:57Speaker 4: not even like that. It's uncomfortable that whole time. I said,
- 56:00Speaker 4: I guess I'm gonna go with it.
- 56:02Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, you are a snowflake. Bro. Yeah, you're about
- 56:06Speaker 1: to texture boy Bow and Yang. You won't believe what
- 56:08Speaker 1: he just said. I'm ready to get out of here, man,
- 56:13Speaker 1: come get me, Tell Lauren to come get me. I'm ready. Man,
- 56:21Speaker 1: you got any spots over there disparaging other people, disparaging
- 56:26Speaker 1: colin jokes, I'll talk shit about us now. Bro, you
- 56:28Speaker 1: think you're about to get the spot on the desk,
- 56:30Speaker 1: you're ready for the desk? Bro, do you think you're
- 56:33Speaker 1: ready for the desk? Don't talk shit about the desk.
- 56:35Speaker 1: You're not ready for the desk. You're joke. Writing's not
- 56:38Speaker 1: tight enough, you're too wordy. Oh man, it's not like
- 56:43Speaker 1: how the fucking Goats did it? Nor have you ever
- 56:45Speaker 1: read his book?
- 56:47Speaker 4: Noo, you've never read his book I've read his book.
- 56:49Speaker 4: No you haven't, I've read his book, you know war
- 56:51Speaker 4: Jeans McDonald. Yeah, yeah, copy in his style. I've been
- 56:56Speaker 4: listening to his specials. I've been johnning down all the
- 56:58Speaker 4: jokes that I'm gonna steal.
- 57:01Speaker 1: This is good, this is good. People have heard this.
- 57:05Speaker 1: Not many people know this one. I don't know people
- 57:07Speaker 1: know this one time for them to hear it. I'm
- 57:09Speaker 1: gonna blow this joke up. They're gonna blow me up.
- 57:13Speaker 1: People got you good, bro, Yeah, they did me dirty.
- 57:16Speaker 5: People will say you rip off two like polar opposite people.
- 57:19Speaker 4: Oh no, it's it's expanded. I have five comments in
- 57:22Speaker 4: a row. This is a Patrise bit, this is a
- 57:24Speaker 4: KB bit, this is Nick's bit, this is John Mullaney's bit.
- 57:27Speaker 4: And then the other people when they say no, it's
- 57:28Speaker 4: not it's not his their bit. Then they go, well
- 57:30Speaker 4: it's not a good bit, and they go, so, which
- 57:32Speaker 4: one is it? It's either five different people's joke or
- 57:34Speaker 4: it sucks.
- 57:36Speaker 1: I think they're saying that Patrese and Mulaney sucked. Yeah,
- 57:39Speaker 1: that's what they're saying.
- 57:40Speaker 5: Either this was Patrise's best bit, or it's.
- 57:42Speaker 4: Not not fine.
- 57:43Speaker 1: Yeah, exactly, dude, mullaney went to church too. Bro Mulaney
- 57:47Speaker 1: went to church. Me I went to church. Mook goes
- 57:51Speaker 1: to church. You went to church, mooke, That like doesn't count.
- 57:56Speaker 1: Let's a that's not does not count? Yeah, No, the
- 57:59Speaker 1: thoms is yeah sing there they have juice and like guitars.
- 58:06Speaker 1: Oh is it like that? Like they like they're all
- 58:07Speaker 1: singing and ship front to tip.
- 58:09Speaker 5: What is it like thirty five minutes? Oh, like forty
- 58:12Speaker 5: five but thirty of like just singing.
- 58:15Speaker 1: That's awesome.
- 58:16Speaker 4: We would sing in Catholic church GLORYA, GLORYA.
- 58:22Speaker 1: I was fun as hell.
- 58:23Speaker 4: Yeah, it's a dude. Catholic church makes no sense because
- 58:28Speaker 4: like you go from like there's no transitions. You go
- 58:31Speaker 4: from like they say a prayer and then all of
- 58:33Speaker 4: a sudden, out of nowhere, the band's just like Gloria,
- 58:36Speaker 4: Like they just break out into song.
- 58:38Speaker 1: There's no like rhythm, and right before that it's some
- 58:40Speaker 1: Latin dude with the stand up like, no, you need transitions,
- 58:45Speaker 1: the pian You gotta be like, hey we're gonna do
- 58:46Speaker 1: We're gonna sing some songs. Now, everyone get up, let's
- 58:48Speaker 1: get singing.
- 58:49Speaker 4: It's just all of a sudden, I know where someone
- 58:50Speaker 4: just walks to the front and they start singing.
- 58:52Speaker 5: I think people are used to it because they go
- 58:53Speaker 5: every week.
- 58:54Speaker 1: Yeah, that's probably true, but they do genre hop. They're
- 58:57Speaker 1: like in the name of the.
- 58:58Speaker 4: Yeah, likes linking you with with the body of the
- 59:06Speaker 4: I don't know what is it?
- 59:07Speaker 1: What are they doing when they do that? They the
- 59:09Speaker 1: dude got me from the point blank, bro, he basically
- 59:12Speaker 1: my face. Yeau, you probably can see the devil in
- 59:14Speaker 1: you with those white jeans on. It wasn't that. I
- 59:17Speaker 1: think that he was treating me like Dolly. He was
- 59:20Speaker 1: going right for the jeans. He was picturing what he
- 59:23Speaker 1: would have did if he got me turn Jesus whe
- 59:32Speaker 1: Oh no, he was have mercy. He was probably trying
- 59:35Speaker 1: to get him see through. He was like, let me
- 59:36Speaker 1: get this guy's white pants through. See what that print
- 59:39Speaker 1: looks like.
- 59:40Speaker 4: White jean contest, spitting on me.
- 59:43Speaker 1: He's fucking dirty ass priests and they're fucking just clinking
- 59:46Speaker 1: incense around. I'm confused, are you doing that now?
- 59:49Speaker 9: At church?
- 59:50Speaker 1: I was just you had a hippie church. No, dude,
- 59:53Speaker 1: it was like ancient Roman incense. It was some weird ship,
- 59:57Speaker 1: some goofball ship. Like are they into the rituals or like,
- 1:00:01Speaker 1: is Jesus flipping over the tables in the temple because
- 1:00:04Speaker 1: we're two uh you know, money based. Are we worshiping
- 1:00:09Speaker 1: false idols? Or we whipping around incense and fucking building
- 1:00:12Speaker 1: massive churches as a fucking supplication to our God? Yeah,
- 1:00:17Speaker 1: clip this, let's get this out. Which one is it?
- 1:00:19Speaker 5: The Eastern floral budget is like six figures right churches.
- 1:00:22Speaker 1: The lighting at this church I went to was like
- 1:00:25Speaker 1: fucking Kanye's last concert. Yeah, Sunday service. The priest popped
- 1:00:29Speaker 1: through the floor like Michael Jackson was it? Was it
- 1:00:36Speaker 1: a long? It was yours long? Two hours? Yeah, seven
- 1:00:39Speaker 1: day church? The uh no, no, but they were doing
- 1:00:45Speaker 1: they were They were giving me like the damn near
- 1:00:47Speaker 1: the whole Old Testament, taking it back to let there
- 1:00:51Speaker 1: be Like was it good? Was it fun? Was it boring?
- 1:00:54Speaker 1: The baptisms were lit.
- 1:00:55Speaker 4: I can't believe you had to go to a baptism
- 1:00:57Speaker 4: one doubled down with an easter one. Dude, I'm surprised
- 1:00:59Speaker 4: it wasn't three hours long.
- 1:01:00Speaker 1: The priest had the they didn't give him the shell
- 1:01:03Speaker 1: that he was supposed to use to to like douse
- 1:01:05Speaker 1: these dudes and He just used his bare hands and
- 1:01:08Speaker 1: was like slapping their forehead where they got water. Yeah,
- 1:01:11Speaker 1: so aggressive. And these dudes had quoths. Bro, these dudes
- 1:01:15Speaker 1: had beautiful hair, and he just completely wrecked their hair,
- 1:01:18Speaker 1: just fucking dousing it the whole rest of the mask.
- 1:01:20Speaker 1: They were fixing their ship. Yeah, self conscious and go
- 1:01:24Speaker 1: to your soap.
- 1:01:25Speaker 4: You just at the gym now, just getting baptized. Fuck,
- 1:01:30Speaker 4: do I baptize through my shirt?
- 1:01:32Speaker 1: Sucks ruined my fucking shirt with the spirit of the Lord.
- 1:01:36Speaker 1: You gotta wear because you gotta wear.
- 1:01:37Speaker 4: Your best fit when you're getting baptized. And you know,
- 1:01:39Speaker 4: you wonder if the I wonder if the body of
- 1:01:41Speaker 4: Christ stands.
- 1:01:42Speaker 5: I were addressed.
- 1:01:44Speaker 1: They make you slip on the dress when you're a baby, Yeah, yeah,
- 1:01:48Speaker 1: they made these dudes because they were dripped out. Yeah.
- 1:01:51Speaker 1: The guy was wearing some fly ash white jeans and
- 1:01:53Speaker 1: they're like, no, you have to put on this frock
- 1:01:55Speaker 1: over the top of it. They slipped him into a
- 1:01:57Speaker 1: little priest garb.
- 1:01:58Speaker 4: Because you're seeing a guy in some pretty and you're like,
- 1:02:00Speaker 4: does he really even need Christ in his life?
- 1:02:02Speaker 1: Looks seems like he's already blessed. Yeah, seems like he's
- 1:02:05Speaker 1: already been anointed. Yeah, I woys tests holier than that.
- 1:02:09Speaker 3: Yeah.
- 1:02:09Speaker 4: They want to bring you down to as low as
- 1:02:11Speaker 4: you can get. Throw on some scrubs or some shit.
- 1:02:14Speaker 4: Fucking bullshit, then you'll get baptized. Dudes always go up
- 1:02:17Speaker 4: to the fucking.
- 1:02:18Speaker 5: Some famous starbus stripes, the.
- 1:02:23Speaker 1: Famous ship that was classic Stars and Stripes was sick
- 1:02:26Speaker 1: in the Name of the Father, Gloria. I had never
- 1:02:34Speaker 1: heard that one. You never heard that one. That one's good,
- 1:02:36Speaker 1: that one's fun to get classic that one. They were
- 1:02:41Speaker 1: this one. They were like Michael Linda Lean, Angels Pray
- 1:02:45Speaker 1: for us. It was fucking sick. What are they sing
- 1:02:48Speaker 1: at your church? It's like a Christian rock really.
- 1:02:52Speaker 4: Yeah, they're just saying like Blink one eighty two.
- 1:02:55Speaker 5: Basically a lot of Chris Tomlin, Matthew West.
- 1:03:00Speaker 1: With our homeless wide hor Yeah yeah, yeah, where Jesus
- 1:03:08Speaker 1: you go up and sing? That's crazy, child.
- 1:03:12Speaker 5: I've gone up and done like skits and like dumb.
- 1:03:14Speaker 4: There running sketch sketches over.
- 1:03:16Speaker 5: These sketches during Christmas time.
- 1:03:17Speaker 1: Dude, that's awesome. What are they like? It's like, are
- 1:03:20Speaker 1: they funny?
- 1:03:21Speaker 5: No, definitely not. It's just like reenacting the Jesus stuff.
- 1:03:25Speaker 1: It seems like it has to be fund. We treated
- 1:03:28Speaker 1: that like Jerry duty though, like you're trying to make
- 1:03:31Speaker 1: I wanted to do it, try to get out of it. Yeah,
- 1:03:33Speaker 1: Mouke played the burning bush.
- 1:03:36Speaker 5: Mincing sense.
- 1:03:38Speaker 1: Yeah that Frank. They crucify yous for the sketches was
- 1:03:41Speaker 1: gone Jesus. Yeah, that's brutal, man, It's it's the best though.
- 1:03:47Speaker 1: Getting I went because my dad sings in the in
- 1:03:50Speaker 1: the choir, so I go to support him. Yeah. I
- 1:03:52Speaker 1: hadn't been on Easter in like ten years. They fucking
- 1:03:55Speaker 1: like light candles out front. I used to just go
- 1:03:57Speaker 1: with my boy Mic to go get fucking you'd get
- 1:04:00Speaker 1: wine drunk. No, no, we would go. We would get
- 1:04:02Speaker 1: barbecue instead of going to church. We would just load
- 1:04:05Speaker 1: up on barbecue on Easter. Get some fucking ribs. That
- 1:04:09Speaker 1: sounds it's awesome. Yeah, that sounds good. You ever go
- 1:04:12Speaker 1: to black church?
- 1:04:14Speaker 2: No?
- 1:04:14Speaker 5: No, we had a black church takeover at our church.
- 1:04:17Speaker 1: Ship had like another church come in and do like
- 1:04:20Speaker 1: we had that though, and it was lit.
- 1:04:22Speaker 4: It was like wild them out great, Like your church
- 1:04:26Speaker 4: was the black church. You guys were like you guys
- 1:04:28Speaker 4: were spitting bars at each other. It was now you
- 1:04:31Speaker 4: wild out the Red Squad, the Blood of Christ. He's risen,
- 1:04:44Speaker 4: Now you wild out.
- 1:04:47Speaker 1: Christ is risen. But your dad's dick wasn't.
- 1:04:52Speaker 3: You know?
- 1:04:52Speaker 1: They'd do some ship like that when the Black Church
- 1:04:55Speaker 1: came to our church, like uh, you could see like
- 1:04:58Speaker 1: all like the like super white ladies in our church
- 1:05:01Speaker 1: trying to like like tap along. Oh yeah, super offbeat.
- 1:05:05Speaker 4: Yeah, white folks are dumb.
- 1:05:07Speaker 1: But like show they had rhythm. They were slapping on
- 1:05:10Speaker 1: the pew. Bron you should go up, So you should
- 1:05:13Speaker 1: go to a Mook's church and spit some balls. They
- 1:05:15Speaker 1: probably love you there, dude. There's a contingent of battle
- 1:05:18Speaker 1: wrappers that also that dude, And it's not just ship
- 1:05:22Speaker 1: like that. They do like stage plays for Jesus. Yeah,
- 1:05:25Speaker 1: like they probably get hired by Mook's church. Yeah, there
- 1:05:28Speaker 1: are those types of dudes.
- 1:05:29Speaker 4: That's crazy. You were like you were, you knew you were,
- 1:05:32Speaker 4: you knew you were born for the stage at a
- 1:05:33Speaker 4: young age of course. Yeah, that was when you first
- 1:05:36Speaker 4: got a taste.
- 1:05:36Speaker 1: The church is big to taste of the light people.
- 1:05:39Speaker 4: Oh yeah, it's a big room. It's a hell of
- 1:05:41Speaker 4: a room.
- 1:05:42Speaker 1: Yeah, you were doing three yeah.
- 1:05:45Speaker 3: Rooms.
- 1:05:46Speaker 1: Yeah, bro, Holy Holy Family has got a great room.
- 1:05:49Speaker 1: Crowds there, Killer Killing Father, They're they're great. Yeah, you're
- 1:05:54Speaker 1: gonna love them, bro, you father, this fucking deacon. All right,
- 1:06:03Speaker 1: how long have you been going? Okay, sixty six week
- 1:06:07Speaker 1: unless you want to keep going, I'm cool. No, Bro,
- 1:06:10Speaker 1: Let's get the fuck out of here.
- 1:06:11Speaker 4: H all right, thank you for listening. We'll see guys
- 1:06:12Speaker 4: next week. Make sure you subscribe to the podcast O