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When Your Dad's Friend Isn't Wearing Pants (Read it on Reddit 8) · WDYM What Do You Mean?

• 0:30
  Speaker 1: you're listening to the wdym, the what do you mean?
• 0:35
  Speaker 1: Podcast, hamilton's number one podcast.
• 0:38
  Speaker 1: Now sit back and relax.
• 0:41
  Speaker 1: Here's hamilton's own, michael gillespie.
• 0:46
  Speaker 1: See, listening to the intro.
• 0:47
  Speaker 1: I never noticed how 80s the intro sounded.
• 0:52
  Speaker 1: That is circa 1985 type intro music vibe.
• 0:58
  Speaker 1: You know I was like man.
• 1:01
  Speaker 1: I'm listening to the intro like yo.
• 1:03
  Speaker 1: That sounds straight from the 80s.
• 1:05
  Speaker 1: That's crazy to me.
• 1:07
  Speaker 1: But either way, I love it.
• 1:09
  Speaker 1: I love it.
• 1:10
  Speaker 1: I love it.
• 1:10
  Speaker 1: I love it.
• 1:12
  Speaker 1: Welcome to the WDYM podcast.
• 1:15
  Speaker 1: I'm your host, michael Gillespie.
• 1:16
  Speaker 1: Hope everybody's doing good.
• 1:17
  Speaker 1: Hope everybody is doing well.
• 1:20
  Speaker 1: Today's episode.
• 1:24
  Speaker 1: We're going a little old school as far as what we're doing today.
• 1:28
  Speaker 1: We are doing a reddit on reddit.
• 1:32
  Speaker 1: I haven't done one this season.
• 1:33
  Speaker 1: I wanted to do one because of the effects of the crystal classic that we just had.
• 1:40
  Speaker 1: Crystal classic is a sleep depriving event that we have here in Fairfield for show choir.
• 1:46
  Speaker 1: That requires almost 20, 29, 30, 31 hours of consistency, staying on your feet, working with people, working with schools and all that jazz.
• 2:00
  Speaker 1: Uh, just get off that.
• 2:01
  Speaker 1: Um, so, sleep deprived.
• 2:04
  Speaker 1: I'm like yo, I gotta do a podcast.
• 2:05
  Speaker 1: Keep the, keep it going, keep everything moving, naturally, and what other, what other thing to do than a Reddit on Reddit.
• 2:14
  Speaker 1: So, without further ado, I got six stories for you and we're going to get straight into it.
• 2:19
  Speaker 1: With the first story titled, the first story from True Concern 1219.
• 2:28
  Speaker 1: My wife, 34 female, is spiraling and I, 36 male, am tired of covering for her.
• 2:35
  Speaker 1: I need her to get her weight under control, but we've been down this road before and it always eventually falls apart.
• 2:42
  Speaker 1: How can I help her See, I'm serious and salvage this Now.
• 2:48
  Speaker 1: This is a long read, so with me, here we go.
• 2:51
  Speaker 1: Before I start, I want to make one thing clear I love my wife.
• 2:56
  Speaker 1: She's the mother of my two children.
• 2:58
  Speaker 1: She's intelligent, funny.
• 3:00
  Speaker 1: I've always been, and remain, attracted to her.
• 3:04
  Speaker 1: She's always been a heavier set when we first met.
• 3:07
  Speaker 1: I've never had a problem with that, except in so far.
• 3:10
  Speaker 1: Now, again, as I read this is what I'm reading exactly word for word from the reddit on reddit insofar as it affects our family quality of life, I'll explain below for some background.
• 3:25
  Speaker 1: We have been married for nine years and she has steadily, steadily gained weight over the course of our marriage.
• 3:30
  Speaker 1: This was particularly exaggerated by the difficult pregnancy which was me, followed by covid, lockdowns and her losing her long-term job.
• 3:38
  Speaker 1: Things continue to get out of hand until early last year when some incidents finally convinced her to see a doctor.
• 3:46
  Speaker 1: Get thing, get control of things.
• 3:48
  Speaker 1: Her weight was well over 500 pounds and her doctor prescribed some zeb bound and recommended she start seeing a therapist.
• 3:55
  Speaker 1: This worked fairly well for a while, though she almost immediately quit therapy and by the end of the last summer by the end of last summer she had lost almost 20 pounds.
• 4:06
  Speaker 1: She had also generally improved her outlook, gotten a part-time job and was much more attractive.
• 4:12
  Speaker 1: We love taking walks together.
• 4:16
  Speaker 1: Things took a turn for the worse in two, in two ways last fall.
• 4:19
  Speaker 1: First, my job switch insurance plans, one that didn't cover glp I don't know what that is, uh, glp minus ones for weight loss and second, I can't remember pathway pretty suddenly, which caused a lot of grief and stress.
• 4:33
  Speaker 1: She was home from work for about a month for one bereavement after the passing, and at the same time her binge eating, which had been suppressed by Zip down, returned with a fury.
• 4:46
  Speaker 1: This blend into the holidays, which are obviously not good for anyone's waistline, and this year she basically fallen back into her old habits.
• 4:57
  Speaker 1: I don't know her current weight, but she definitely gained it back plus some.
• 5:02
  Speaker 1: That's where the advice portion starts.
• 5:04
  Speaker 1: I've had started adjusting my life in a lot of ways to accommodate her limitations, and the list grows longer each week.
• 5:12
  Speaker 1: While no means exhaustive, this list includes she is unable to put her socks or shoes on or trim her toenails on her own, always need help getting up from the sofa, which is pretty low, or playing with the kids to school, despite working from home myself, because she is too big to safely fit behind the wheel.
• 5:35
  Speaker 1: When friends invite us out, have to make excuses to cancel plans and lie to them to avoid admitting things like no, we can't come out because she can't stand up for too long.
• 5:45
  Speaker 1: Our social life is in a tank.
• 5:49
  Speaker 1: Our romantic life sucks.
• 5:52
  Speaker 1: Basically all dates are stay at home, take out and watch a movie, because she gets so anxious about restaurants, can't fit in movie theaters and can't do most things that involve physical activity.
• 6:04
  Speaker 1: Most weekdays when she isn't working, she barely leaves bed, leaving me to work full time and to do all the child care at the same time.
• 6:12
  Speaker 1: Once they're home from school, grocery shopping is a nightmare because she can't really stay standing up long enough.
• 6:21
  Speaker 1: But it's too proud to roll around on one of those store scooters, so she stays in the car, calls me airpods and tells me what to get, and if I refuse her anything, suddenly I'm being manipulative or insulting her weight.
• 6:37
  Speaker 1: The whole thing makes me feel like a drug dealer or something.
• 6:42
  Speaker 1: Every week on sunday she basically hypes herself up about how this would be the week to turn everything around, but then she never changes anything.
• 6:50
  Speaker 1: And if I remind her what she said and try to curb her eating choices, I'm not being helpful.
• 6:58
  Speaker 1: I'm honestly getting real sick of all this and feel like feel close to snapping.
• 7:02
  Speaker 1: To top everything off, my job is partially funded by federal grant money so, as of two weeks ago, I'm unemployed and looking for work.
• 7:10
  Speaker 1: I can't handle everything that I'm being asked to do and the stress is killing me to a point.
• 7:16
  Speaker 1: I frequently fantasize about running away just to book a plane and leave her to deal with things for a weekend.
• 7:23
  Speaker 1: I would never actually do that, but it makes you feel like a terrible husband and father to even have those thoughts.
• 7:29
  Speaker 1: I feel like I'm living in father to even have those thoughts.
• 7:30
  Speaker 1: I feel like I'm living in a loop of broken promises and plans every week.
• 7:35
  Speaker 1: I don't know how to get it to stick.
• 7:36
  Speaker 1: Obviously, I've been heavily considering the health insurance plan for whenever I look into work next, as GLP-1s have been the only thing that really helped so far.
• 7:49
  Speaker 1: How can I show her how much I'm hurting without looking shallow or selfish?
• 7:53
  Speaker 1: How can I get one of her diet attempts to stick?
• 7:56
  Speaker 1: While we wait for another opportunity to get the drugs Weight loss drugs, to be specific, for the foreseeable future, I'm going to have to do extra because she can't physically help right now with a lot of things.
• 8:10
  Speaker 1: I a plan and an end in sight.
• 8:11
  Speaker 1: I'm gonna go nuts.
• 8:11
  Speaker 1: So true, concern.
• 8:13
  Speaker 1: 1219 what in the world are you gonna do?
• 8:17
  Speaker 1: Okay, so here we go.
• 8:27
  Speaker 1: First, one of the day, truly Concerned.
• 8:30
  Speaker 1: 1219,.
• 8:33
  Speaker 1: You got yourself into this mess when you married her and you knew she was a little bit plus size.
• 8:39
  Speaker 1: Now, now you know that's plus plus size.
• 8:43
  Speaker 1: We talking 500 pounds, that's a lot.
• 8:50
  Speaker 1: I mean anything with 500,.
• 8:54
  Speaker 1: If it's money, that sounds like a lot.
• 8:58
  Speaker 1: If it's Lego pieces, that sounds like a lot.
• 9:01
  Speaker 1: 500 miles, that like a lot.
• 9:07
  Speaker 1: 500 miles, that's a lot.
• 9:08
  Speaker 1: So you knew what you were getting into when you signed up for it and now it seems like she's gotten used to a life where she can dictate life to you.
• 9:20
  Speaker 1: But again, you said some key things that should be triggering you, like marriage.
• 9:28
  Speaker 1: You are married.
• 9:30
  Speaker 1: Marriage for me is a joining of two people become one.
• 9:34
  Speaker 1: And right now it's 80 20, her.
• 9:40
  Speaker 1: She's up, you got your airpods, is shopping and she's telling you what to get.
• 9:46
  Speaker 1: What is she saying?
• 9:47
  Speaker 1: Says okay, we're gonna call you Truth concern, get those twinkies over there, Get them now.
• 9:55
  Speaker 1: What is she saying in those airpods hey, you know those ho-hos In the diet section, go ahead, give me some of those.
• 10:06
  Speaker 1: At one point you have to let her know, like, look, this is not what I signed up for.
• 10:15
  Speaker 1: I understand, you should understand.
• 10:18
  Speaker 1: In a marriage, things are going to get big, get small, go up, go down.
• 10:22
  Speaker 1: Marriage is a rollerco roller coaster ups and downs and everything.
• 10:26
  Speaker 1: This is part of part of the plan, but at some point you got to put your foot down and stand up.
• 10:33
  Speaker 1: There's certain things that she can't.
• 10:36
  Speaker 1: She can't even put her shoes on, huh, and the thing that concerns me the most, she said you, she can't even trim them toenails.
• 10:41
  Speaker 1: Huh, if you're laying in bed and she turns over and swipe, swipe, you could lose a leg because toenails grow and now those are strong.
• 10:52
  Speaker 1: So, my brother.
• 10:53
  Speaker 1: This is what you gotta do, one.
• 10:54
  Speaker 1: You have to force life into her.
• 10:57
  Speaker 1: You gotta go on walks.
• 10:59
  Speaker 1: You gotta get salads.
• 11:00
  Speaker 1: You gotta get vegetables.
• 11:02
  Speaker 1: You gotta get.
• 11:03
  Speaker 1: Don't you buy no pop.
• 11:05
  Speaker 1: Don't you bring no sugary things in the house.
• 11:07
  Speaker 1: Don't you bring those chips in the house.
• 11:09
  Speaker 1: You got to look.
• 11:11
  Speaker 1: I'm here to help you because you need help, because you're my significant other and I care, and I'm letting you know straight up this is what's going to happen.
• 11:21
  Speaker 1: We're going to take walks Three times a week, three times a day, whatever you set, and when you get home you're gonna get us, you're gonna get you a nice healthy, hearty salad with carrots and hype it up carrots, cucumbers, croutons, and that's what we're eating.
• 11:42
  Speaker 1: And guess what?
• 11:43
  Speaker 1: We're gonna have the nice ices coldest water with a lemon in it.
• 11:47
  Speaker 1: Right, start there, put your foot down and let the progress show and you gotta, you gotta be strong, you gotta be headstrong when you do this, because a lot of people you can't change people unless they see that you mean it right.
• 12:04
  Speaker 1: So, start like that, get that going that way and don't don't buckle.
• 12:09
  Speaker 1: Don't buckle because I, from what I could tell, I mean I can't really like her life will fall apart if you're not there.
• 12:18
  Speaker 1: But it seems like you want to be there.
• 12:20
  Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying, but you, you wrote the paragraph that long, so it seems like you want to be there.
• 12:27
  Speaker 1: You have to set those goals for her and for you and be there for her.
• 12:32
  Speaker 1: That's the thing.
• 12:35
  Speaker 1: You have to do it that way.
• 12:36
  Speaker 1: Do that, give it 30 days and see if she can get some progress.
• 12:41
  Speaker 1: But you have to be firm with that.
• 12:43
  Speaker 1: You have to be firm with that.
• 12:46
  Speaker 1: You have to be firm with that.
• 12:47
  Speaker 1: Good luck to you.
• 12:48
  Speaker 1: True concern 12, 19.
• 12:50
  Speaker 1: Boy, you said 500 pounds, bro.
• 12:56
  Speaker 1: There's nothing wrong.
• 12:57
  Speaker 1: There's nothing wrong with liking things big and stuff we all like things.
• 13:01
  Speaker 1: Be big Mac.
• 13:02
  Speaker 1: We don't go to McDonald'sdonald's for a little mac or mac jr.
• 13:06
  Speaker 1: Wow, you know.
• 13:07
  Speaker 1: Hey, teach us on again.
• 13:09
  Speaker 1: I ain't judging, but I'll give you some advice the best way I can.
• 13:13
  Speaker 1: Topic number two, by unaccomplished gear 736 I, 33, female.
• 13:21
  Speaker 1: Caught my dad, 63, male, cheating question mark.
• 13:26
  Speaker 1: All right, here we go.
• 13:29
  Speaker 1: I went to my dad's house today while his wife 58, and half-sister, 23, were away on a trip.
• 13:38
  Speaker 1: I never had a mother, so he's the only parent I've ever had question mark.
• 13:44
  Speaker 1: Now let me stop right there.
• 13:48
  Speaker 1: What?
• 13:48
  Speaker 1: Okay, I've always looked up to him when I walk in.
• 13:51
  Speaker 1: A woman I've never seen before was lounging on the couch wearing only an oversized shirt, which looked like his, with no pants, casually dyeing her hair.
• 14:00
  Speaker 1: There were high heels tossed at the entrance.
• 14:03
  Speaker 1: She didn't speak my language, stared at me in a in a halfway that felt bold, like I was the one intruding in my own home.
• 14:11
  Speaker 1: I asked her who she was.
• 14:14
  Speaker 1: Instead of giving me a normal response, she dodged the question and just said her name in english.
• 14:19
  Speaker 1: No explanation, no attempt at basic manners.
• 14:22
  Speaker 1: My dad, who's 63, walked in a few minutes later and introduced me to her in english, but she still didn't acknowledge me until he literally had to say hello to get her to react.
• 14:33
  Speaker 1: Then she just got up barefoot and walked to the bathroom like he's, like she owned the place.
• 14:37
  Speaker 1: He even asked if she, if she, wanted him to help dye the back of her hair.
• 14:42
  Speaker 1: I pulled him aside and asked Dad, who is she?
• 14:45
  Speaker 1: He said a friend of a friend.
• 14:48
  Speaker 1: I asked what friend?
• 14:51
  Speaker 1: And he just threw out some random person's name, someone none of us ever heard of.
• 14:55
  Speaker 1: When I asked why is she here, he gave me a half-assed story about her being a refugee that this supposed friend asked him to help.
• 15:05
  Speaker 1: Asked him straight up if she is a cheese worker Again, quick pause and explanation.
• 15:12
  Speaker 1: This is a G show.
• 15:13
  Speaker 1: You won't have to substitute what the cheese really means.
• 15:16
  Speaker 1: But if you know the show and you know Reddit on Reddit, you know what cheese is.
• 15:20
  Speaker 1: And he laughed and said no way.
• 15:21
  Speaker 1: I asked so is she staying here because she has nowhere to go?
• 15:26
  Speaker 1: He immediately said no, no, no, nothing like that, just a favor for a friend.
• 15:31
  Speaker 1: So then, why is she here?
• 15:33
  Speaker 1: But my dad has no connection to refugees, and definitely not to young women like her.
• 15:38
  Speaker 1: And even if that was somewhat true, why is she half naked in our house, with freshly dyed hair?
• 15:47
  Speaker 1: To make things even weirder, he called me at 1130 pm last night asking if I was still at the house.
• 15:51
  Speaker 1: I didn't think much about it at the time, but now it's obvious he was checking to make sure I wasn't there.
• 15:59
  Speaker 1: The whole thing made me sick the way she was so comfortable, the way he talked to her and the fact that she looked my age or younger.
• 16:09
  Speaker 1: When I left I said goodbye.
• 16:12
  Speaker 1: She didn't say anything back.
• 16:13
  Speaker 1: She sat there like I was irrelevant.
• 16:15
  Speaker 1: I was so disgusted I texted my dad afterwards.
• 16:18
  Speaker 1: Tell your quote unquote friend that his basic manners is to say goodbye instead of ignoring me.
• 16:24
  Speaker 1: I called my half sister, who's 23, because at first I thought maybe it was one of her friends.
• 16:29
  Speaker 1: But when I described what I saw, she was just as shocked as I was.
• 16:33
  Speaker 1: She had no idea who this woman was.
• 16:35
  Speaker 1: We talked on the phone and I nearly cried.
• 16:38
  Speaker 1: We've always seen our dad as a good, humble man.
• 16:41
  Speaker 1: This is just horrifying.
• 16:44
  Speaker 1: For now I asked her not to say anything to her mom until we know more.
• 16:50
  Speaker 1: We don't know what to do.
• 16:51
  Speaker 1: I don't know how to even look at him.
• 16:53
  Speaker 1: Now I really feel sad and disgusted.
• 16:57
  Speaker 1: I guess I'm posting this just to get support and sympathy, because I feel like the only parent I have is gone.
• 17:03
  Speaker 1: I feel so disgusted with him and wondering how to get past this situation.
• 17:08
  Speaker 1: So accomplish gear 7, 3, 6.
• 17:12
  Speaker 1: I got a sound bite for you, ready, here you go.
• 17:15
  Speaker 1: My mom told me to tell you to mind your damn business.
• 17:20
  Speaker 1: Look here, your dad is 63.
• 17:28
  Speaker 1: I mean, from what you're telling me, his wife is 58.
• 17:34
  Speaker 1: And your half-sister is 23.
• 17:37
  Speaker 1: Everybody is adults in the house, right?
• 17:41
  Speaker 1: Do you not think his wife knows something?
• 17:45
  Speaker 1: Or knows that this person is in the house, or something like that?
• 17:51
  Speaker 1: Do you really think your dad is out there running streets with a young lady who's about your age, at 33?
• 17:58
  Speaker 1: That's weird.
• 18:00
  Speaker 1: And for you to just be all heartbroken and, oh my dad, what are you doing?
• 18:05
  Speaker 1: And here you go.
• 18:07
  Speaker 1: My mom told me to tell you, to mind your damn mind, he has grown 63.
• 18:16
  Speaker 1: He's grown.
• 18:17
  Speaker 1: Leave him alone.
• 18:19
  Speaker 1: Listen, he is obligated.
• 18:22
  Speaker 1: He is married, 58-year-old wife, I mean you, 33-year-old female.
• 18:32
  Speaker 1: Why are you all in your dad 63-year-old?
• 18:36
  Speaker 1: Why are you in his business?
• 18:38
  Speaker 1: This, listen?
• 18:39
  Speaker 1: This is why you just need to chill and just let him handle his his thing.
• 18:46
  Speaker 1: If, even if, he is playing like that which he shouldn't, which I doubt it.
• 18:50
  Speaker 1: I mean, come on, man, he's 63 and you said she's your age or younger, so let's just say, hypothetically, she's 30.
• 18:57
  Speaker 1: Ain't no 30 year old woman looking for that, right?
• 19:02
  Speaker 1: I mean some things called common sense, sense.
• 19:05
  Speaker 1: Common sense has got to come into this situation where you know, you know you and you know your dad ain't playing this, ain't doing this, right?
• 19:14
  Speaker 1: Plus, this is your dad, right.
• 19:16
  Speaker 1: So you should know your dad actions and behaviors because he's your dad.
• 19:22
  Speaker 1: If your dad has no history of doing this, why is he doing it now and again with someone who is basically the age of his child?
• 19:33
  Speaker 1: You think you think he's doing something?
• 19:34
  Speaker 1: You think I don't think so.
• 19:36
  Speaker 1: I just think you need to mind your business because, especially you over his house, I just think you should mind your business on that, on that one, I just think, I just think you, you reaching your business on that, on that one, I just think, I just think you reaching, you reaching, you thinking, you assuming, because mom and half sister were gone, you think he doing dirt guess what?
• 19:55
  Speaker 1: Not all men do dirt right.
• 19:59
  Speaker 1: And let alone, if he was doing dirt, why would your butt be over there, would you think?
• 20:05
  Speaker 1: Would you think he'd be better at this?
• 20:08
  Speaker 1: But maybe because he's 63, he thought he was, he was clear and he could just do whatever.
• 20:12
  Speaker 1: I don't know.
• 20:13
  Speaker 1: I think you're reaching again.
• 20:15
  Speaker 1: Just mind your business, your dad, your dad, old bro, just just let it go like, like that.
• 20:23
  Speaker 1: You know, don't, don't, don't assume that that's the case.
• 20:29
  Speaker 1: Next story by scrambled egg 02.
• 20:34
  Speaker 1: Here we go.
• 20:35
  Speaker 1: Scrambled egg 02.
• 20:37
  Speaker 1: How do I, female 22, enjoy cheese with other people when my ex who who was also male 22, was so much better.
• 20:47
  Speaker 1: I female 22, broke up with my ex, male 22, almost two years ago.
• 20:54
  Speaker 1: The cheese was so indescribably good that I don't know that anyone else will ever be able to live up to it, that anyone else will ever be able to live up to it.
• 21:03
  Speaker 1: It's always disappointing with other people, even ones that I have deep emotional connections, dated one for a year and genuinely really loved.
• 21:15
  Speaker 1: I generally think it's because of his girth.
• 21:19
  Speaker 1: I mean, I wasn't expecting this one.
• 21:24
  Speaker 1: Generally think it's because of his baseball bat again, g-show, and how, oh man, and how I should have reread this one.
• 21:33
  Speaker 1: I just looked at the top and read it and went from there Start all over.
• 21:38
  Speaker 1: I generally think it's because of his baseball bat and how just like strong he is.
• 21:43
  Speaker 1: So I got manhandled.
• 21:47
  Speaker 1: Not many other people could do that manhandling part, but of course can't change the baseball bat.
• 21:56
  Speaker 1: How can I get over it?
• 21:58
  Speaker 1: Is there something specific I can do that will make it better with other people, or did my ex just ruin cheese for me forever?
• 22:09
  Speaker 1: All right, scrambled egg Zero two.
• 22:16
  Speaker 1: We got some problems here, all right.
• 22:18
  Speaker 1: First off, you're 22.
• 22:20
  Speaker 1: Okay, you got time to get over this, right?
• 22:25
  Speaker 1: So you can't.
• 22:29
  Speaker 1: You know, baseball bats are just that baseball bats, it's how you swing the bat.
• 22:36
  Speaker 1: Okay, you gotta let these, let these men know how you like to play baseball in g.
• 22:45
  Speaker 1: Show people.
• 22:46
  Speaker 1: I need you guys to think, I mean, there's nothing wrong with the communication.
• 22:49
  Speaker 1: It sounds like a communication issue with whoever you are seeing and dating and stuff like that Is cheese room for you.
• 22:58
  Speaker 1: You could be lactose intolerant, you could be, but you're not.
• 23:04
  Speaker 1: You just got used to something because you're 22.
• 23:07
  Speaker 1: You are young, you is a puppy.
• 23:09
  Speaker 1: You just started.
• 23:09
  Speaker 1: Don something because you're 22.
• 23:11
  Speaker 1: You are young, you is a puppy, you just started.
• 23:12
  Speaker 1: Don't do that to yourself.
• 23:14
  Speaker 1: What you got to do is one Maybe that's your type and you find that similar type.
• 23:20
  Speaker 1: That's number one.
• 23:22
  Speaker 1: Two Let them know what you, the things you like.
• 23:29
  Speaker 1: You ever play 20 questions.
• 23:32
  Speaker 1: Maybe you should do that.
• 23:33
  Speaker 1: Play some 20 questions and put out hints that, hey, you know I like to play baseball from time to time and you know that's what you like, okay, and then, and then normally normal guys go oh, oh, really, okay, let me take some notes.
• 23:53
  Speaker 1: There's nothing wrong with communicating what you like and see if you can play baseball that way and have cheese together.
• 23:59
  Speaker 1: That's what you should do.
• 24:01
  Speaker 1: I think you should communicate, you know, find your type, communicate that hey, this is how you like to play baseball, and wish you nothing but the best.
• 24:10
  Speaker 1: I mean, there ain't really nothing I could say about that.
• 24:13
  Speaker 1: It's just you're 22.
• 24:15
  Speaker 1: Quit, quit acting like life is over because you've had things one way.
• 24:20
  Speaker 1: There's multiple ways to crack an egg, scrambled egg, old too.
• 24:23
  Speaker 1: You see what I did there.
• 24:25
  Speaker 1: So, yes, communicate and find what you like.
• 24:29
  Speaker 1: I mean, that's basically how it goes to, and if you can't find it, keep searching.
• 24:33
  Speaker 1: You are 22, you are a puppy.
• 24:35
  Speaker 1: You will find what you want.
• 24:40
  Speaker 1: Next, my 20 year old, 24 year old male ex, 21 year old female owes me money, but we haven't spoken over a month.
• 24:49
  Speaker 1: How do I get it back?
• 24:50
  Speaker 1: This is from thick distribution for a six.
• 24:53
  Speaker 1: My ex was in bad debt over four months ago.
• 24:57
  Speaker 1: I decided to pay it off for her and she said I'll pay it back to you Once I have enough.
• 25:04
  Speaker 1: The last time we spoke about money, she said she was 1500 in debt and that was two months ago.
• 25:10
  Speaker 1: We broke up since and ended on bad terms.
• 25:12
  Speaker 1: She says she didn't want to talk to me again and we haven't contacted in over a month.
• 25:18
  Speaker 1: I'm currently in a financial situation and you need your money back, but it seems like I won't be getting it back.
• 25:24
  Speaker 1: How would I go about it?
• 25:26
  Speaker 1: At least asking for it's possible for her to pay me back.
• 25:31
  Speaker 1: Well, this is this is gonna be short you ain't getting your money back.
• 25:35
  Speaker 1: You guys ended on bad terms and you haven't talked in over a month.
• 25:41
  Speaker 1: You know the funny thing about money and friends because I know about this experience it doesn't go well.
• 25:46
  Speaker 1: It doesn't blend well at all.
• 25:48
  Speaker 1: No, despite, despite how long the friendship is.
• 25:52
  Speaker 1: And the other thing about this one y'all y'all like to eat cheese together, right?
• 25:59
  Speaker 1: Y'all just sharing cheese together.
• 26:00
  Speaker 1: How about some provolone, like, oh, let me get some of that mozzarella.
• 26:04
  Speaker 1: Oh, that cheddar was real good.
• 26:07
  Speaker 1: Y'all was just sharing cheese, a platter of cheese.
• 26:10
  Speaker 1: And she says she don't want to talk to you again.
• 26:13
  Speaker 1: You know why?
• 26:14
  Speaker 1: Because she knows in the back of her mind she owes you money.
• 26:18
  Speaker 1: Friends, girlfriends, cheese lovers all together.
• 26:22
  Speaker 1: You ain't getting this money back.
• 26:24
  Speaker 1: Player, you might as well kiss it goodbye.
• 26:26
  Speaker 1: I know for a fact you ain't getting money.
• 26:28
  Speaker 1: It's just that's what happens.
• 26:30
  Speaker 1: Money and friends never mix.
• 26:32
  Speaker 1: Unfortunately, despite the connection, the bond and everything, money and friends, money and lovers don't mix.
• 26:42
  Speaker 1: It's sad, too, not happening.
• 26:44
  Speaker 1: That was short, easy and straight to the point.
• 26:46
  Speaker 1: You ain't getting a dime back, homie nice, try next one from demonic dream.
• 26:58
  Speaker 1: I, 30 year old female, don't know what to do after a fight with my boyfriend, 48 oh 48 male, my boyfriend's 48 of six years and I, 30, argue over something minor, but the situation escalated quickly.
• 27:12
  Speaker 1: He closed all the doors, not locking them, to prevent me from leaving the house because I wanted to get out of the situation.
• 27:19
  Speaker 1: He spoke to me in an unacceptable tone, which unfortunately happens far too often when we argue.
• 27:25
  Speaker 1: The argument originally started because our dog was excited to see him ran through the flower bed, cross the yard and back into the house.
• 27:33
  Speaker 1: My boyfriend was extremely upset, almost yelled at me.
• 27:37
  Speaker 1: I told him I would clean it up, even though nothing was actually dirty.
• 27:40
  Speaker 1: First I wanted to finish preparing our lunch.
• 27:44
  Speaker 1: When I turned around, he accused me of rolling my eyes at him and started throwing various accusations my way.
• 27:50
  Speaker 1: In response, I told him he could make his own food and that I was going to take the dog out for a walk.
• 27:55
  Speaker 1: That's when the situation escalated.
• 27:57
  Speaker 1: He blocked my way.
• 27:58
  Speaker 1: I threatened to call my parents if he didn't let me leave immediately.
• 28:03
  Speaker 1: Maybe it wasn't entirely fair of me to want to leave, but our arguments never lead anywhere.
• 28:09
  Speaker 1: And last for hours.
• 28:10
  Speaker 1: He let me proceed.
• 28:12
  Speaker 1: I put the leash on the dog, but when I wanted to leave, he closed all the doors again, grabbed me by the shoulder and held me back.
• 28:19
  Speaker 1: I repeatedly told him to let me go until I ended up screaming at him and somehow managed to free myself from his grip.
• 28:26
  Speaker 1: I had to walk in the dog.
• 28:27
  Speaker 1: I packed my things, took my dog with me and drove to a friend's place.
• 28:30
  Speaker 1: I wasn't ready to talk to him because I didn't feel safe.
• 28:34
  Speaker 1: Since then, he's been texting me.
• 28:35
  Speaker 1: Some messages are full of remorse, while others are calm and objective.
• 28:39
  Speaker 1: He has apologized countless times and begged me to come back.
• 28:44
  Speaker 1: So far I haven't gone home.
• 28:45
  Speaker 1: Unfortunately, we argue a lot about things.
• 28:49
  Speaker 1: He wants me to do more around the house, work more, so that he doesn't have to pay for everything, even though I can't work much due to health reasons.
• 28:57
  Speaker 1: Yet he also complains that when the house isn't clean enough.
• 29:07
  Speaker 1: On top of that, we have issues with cheese from the very beginning.
• 29:08
  Speaker 1: It's very important to him, but not to to me, especially since I experienced some abuse as a child.
• 29:11
  Speaker 1: We won't be able to find a solution for this problem and I'm aware of the logical consequences, but at this point I don't know what to do anymore.
• 29:18
  Speaker 1: Right now.
• 29:19
  Speaker 1: I want to go back.
• 29:20
  Speaker 1: I don't want to go back, but the thought of breaking up with him doesn't feel right either.
• 29:24
  Speaker 1: How do I deal with the best of the situation?
• 29:27
  Speaker 1: Cue the music, okay.
• 29:31
  Speaker 1: So flags have gone, or flags on the field.
• 29:34
  Speaker 1: We have an 18 year.
• 29:36
  Speaker 1: 18 year difference in age.
• 29:40
  Speaker 1: This is what I say.
• 29:41
  Speaker 1: If there's an actual adult between the age gaps, you're too old or you're too young, depending on how you look at it.
• 29:50
  Speaker 1: There's a human between you.
• 29:53
  Speaker 1: You're 30, the man's 48.
• 29:55
  Speaker 1: You need to find someone your age.
• 29:57
  Speaker 1: This is a lose-lose situation, because he feels that he has power over you, and he does.
• 30:04
  Speaker 1: He's 18 years older than you.
• 30:07
  Speaker 1: He has experienced a whole bunch of life while you're still experiencing life.
• 30:16
  Speaker 1: And I'm never a fan of animals.
• 30:19
  Speaker 1: If the animal can't stay in the cage and just be chill with it, don't want it.
• 30:23
  Speaker 1: Cats, dogs, hamsters, no, no, no one.
• 30:30
  Speaker 1: I'm allergic to cats and dogs and their dander so I don't play like that.
• 30:35
  Speaker 1: No dogs, no cats, no smoking.
• 30:38
  Speaker 1: Those are the things that are flags for me.
• 30:42
  Speaker 1: The way his mannerisms are to you are in my advantage is his advantage of life.
• 30:52
  Speaker 1: He has over you.
• 30:53
  Speaker 1: He grabbed you by the shoulder.
• 30:55
  Speaker 1: Things like that ain't part of a relationship.
• 30:58
  Speaker 1: You know, anytime there is unnecessary physical interaction, it needs to be looked at.
• 31:06
  Speaker 1: Grabbed you over the shoulder, didn't want you to leave.
• 31:10
  Speaker 1: All those type of things to me are flags on the field Penalties.
• 31:14
  Speaker 1: You know those are things that you need to be looking at.
• 31:18
  Speaker 1: But it seemed like there was some talking points.
• 31:20
  Speaker 1: If you've been together for six years and now you know you're bringing up the, the abuse, the lactose intolerance, the cheese abuse that you have and everything, you've been together six years, so what's going on with that?
• 31:34
  Speaker 1: Again, there's only so much I can read into Without knowing everything.
• 31:39
  Speaker 1: So what should you do?
• 31:41
  Speaker 1: One, you should find you a man.
• 31:42
  Speaker 1: Your age, your age gap is too big for me Personally.
• 31:48
  Speaker 1: Secondly, get rid of the dog.
• 31:52
  Speaker 1: That's what's causing the problem, the dog.
• 31:52
  Speaker 1: It ain't the relationship, it's the daggone dog.
• 31:54
  Speaker 1: Get rid of it.
• 31:55
  Speaker 1: The final look, it's either you or the human, and you're choosing the dog, apparently.
• 32:00
  Speaker 1: And maybe if you just finish that sandwich he would have been cool, but he might have been really hungry, don't know.
• 32:06
  Speaker 1: But yeah, I think you should find somebody more your age and go from there.
• 32:11
  Speaker 1: The last one of the day, the last one of the day by oh yeah, your nana, oh five, your nana, oh five says intimacy issues for a male 32 and a female of 28.
• 32:32
  Speaker 1: How to fix this, they going to say.
• 32:37
  Speaker 1: Me and my husband have been married for five years.
• 32:39
  Speaker 1: We have a baby boy, two years old now.
• 32:42
  Speaker 1: Our intimacy was great before, but currently, for the past months, the intimacy is gone.
• 32:51
  Speaker 1: I was initiating before and he doesn't to me, so I got tired and just stopped doing it.
• 32:57
  Speaker 1: Hugs, kisses, cuddles he doesn't give me those needs anymore.
• 33:01
  Speaker 1: He just uses his phone while we have alone time together when baby is asleep.
• 33:07
  Speaker 1: Question mark Same problem with our cheese life.
• 33:10
  Speaker 1: He also doesn't initiate and keep on promising that, for example, we would have cheese tonight.
• 33:17
  Speaker 1: Turns out it doesn't happen.
• 33:18
  Speaker 1: So my heart is broken by this.
• 33:20
  Speaker 1: I am so drained.
• 33:21
  Speaker 1: I don't feel loved and desired and I feel insecure.
• 33:25
  Speaker 1: I'm so curious why he doesn't look for it or miss it.
• 33:29
  Speaker 1: It's been a month.
• 33:31
  Speaker 1: Sometimes we have cheese two to three times a month, but the quality of the cheese is very bad.
• 33:39
  Speaker 1: He won't play around.
• 33:42
  Speaker 1: He would just lay side by side last minutes and he's done.
• 33:47
  Speaker 1: I talked to him.
• 33:47
  Speaker 1: He said he's just tired at work.
• 33:50
  Speaker 1: I told him how can you be tired?
• 33:52
  Speaker 1: You only work half a day and no reasons after that.
• 33:55
  Speaker 1: I know he doesn't have any other woman on the side, I'm sure of it.
• 33:59
  Speaker 1: I feel so devastated now.
• 34:01
  Speaker 1: Please give me some advice.
• 34:03
  Speaker 1: I know you will say go to counseling, but please give me some advice.
• 34:08
  Speaker 1: Okay, cue the music.
• 34:09
  Speaker 1: Okay, say go to counseling, but please give me some advice.
• 34:10
  Speaker 1: Okay, cutie music.
• 34:10
  Speaker 1: Okay.
• 34:11
  Speaker 1: So married for five years and got the intimacy issues, he's not even trying.
• 34:15
  Speaker 1: And having cheese side by side, that's that's all weird to me.
• 34:24
  Speaker 1: Is it weird to you guys?
• 34:25
  Speaker 1: Okay, so this is what you do.
• 34:28
  Speaker 1: This is what you do one night.
• 34:30
  Speaker 1: Go all out, 100 percent, the, the uh, negligee the, the romantic mood, set the mood and everything.
• 34:41
  Speaker 1: Get it all together to to evaluate his interests, right.
• 34:46
  Speaker 1: I mean, I'm talking about from the moment you guys wake up text message pictures.
• 34:51
  Speaker 1: Just hype this man up, check the interests, like.
• 34:57
  Speaker 1: Check the interests.
• 34:58
  Speaker 1: If he's like, oh shoot, we having some cheese tonight Okay, macaroni and cheese, that's what we talking about.
• 35:04
  Speaker 1: And if he doesn't match your energy, then you might need to.
• 35:11
  Speaker 1: You might you might need to look something else.
• 35:13
  Speaker 1: If he.
• 35:14
  Speaker 1: My question is if he's working half days, why is he so tired?
• 35:19
  Speaker 1: Like he shouldn't be that tired, he should be energized.
• 35:23
  Speaker 1: Especially if you set them up like this, you set them up a hundred percent.
• 35:26
  Speaker 1: It's like wait till you get home tonight.
• 35:29
  Speaker 1: Or talk some crazy Like when you get home tonight.
• 35:31
  Speaker 1: Or talk some crazy like when you get home, boy, that cheese is gonna be on a spread platter with some ham.
• 35:35
  Speaker 1: That it was where.
• 35:39
  Speaker 1: That's how you're gonna pique the interest for it.
• 35:40
  Speaker 1: If he's like, oh shoot, I'm ready, I'm ready, then then it's something wrong.
• 35:49
  Speaker 1: You just got to communicate, say, look, this is what I want, blah, blah, blah and go on from there.
• 35:56
  Speaker 1: If he does not match your energy, I don't know.
• 35:59
  Speaker 1: I mean because y'all married and got a kid and two-year-old kid and you said you said let me find what he said.
• 36:07
  Speaker 1: One he said side by side.
• 36:08
  Speaker 1: That's crazy to me.
• 36:09
  Speaker 1: And then you said let me find what he said.
• 36:09
  Speaker 1: One he said side by side.
• 36:09
  Speaker 1: That's crazy to me.
• 36:10
  Speaker 1: And then you said hold on, let me read it.
• 36:12
  Speaker 1: He just uses his phone while we have alone time together and when the baby's sleeping.
• 36:18
  Speaker 1: What do you mean by that?
• 36:20
  Speaker 1: What do you mean?
• 36:22
  Speaker 1: He got his phone out.
• 36:24
  Speaker 1: That sounds weird.
• 36:25
  Speaker 1: Is he looking up cheese recipes online?
• 36:27
  Speaker 1: That needs to be looked at, because that's not the same as eating real cheese.
• 36:36
  Speaker 1: I'm just saying so yeah, evaluate the situation.
• 36:40
  Speaker 1: He needs to match your energy and quit the side-by-side.
• 36:44
  Speaker 1: Don't even.
• 36:45
  Speaker 1: That's weird.
• 36:46
  Speaker 1: We having cheese the regular way, we having cheese, no side by side.
• 36:53
  Speaker 1: Who does that?
• 36:53
  Speaker 1: I don't like that idea.
• 36:56
  Speaker 1: That's terrible.
• 36:57
  Speaker 1: So there you go.
• 36:59
  Speaker 1: That is reddit on reddit.
• 37:03
  Speaker 1: These people are crazy, man.
• 37:07
  Speaker 1: I cannot fathom that some of this stuff is real.
• 37:11
  Speaker 1: I don't.
• 37:13
  Speaker 1: I don't believe it.
• 37:14
  Speaker 1: I believe some of it's real and some of it's just stretched out, pulled to the extreme.
• 37:19
  Speaker 1: But there you go.
• 37:21
  Speaker 1: Well, that is the show.
• 37:23
  Speaker 1: Thank you for tuning in.
• 37:26
  Speaker 1: I don't even know what to say, man.
• 37:30
  Speaker 1: People are crazy.
• 37:30
  Speaker 1: People are absolute crazy.
• 37:32
  Speaker 1: But continue to eat cheese, man, continue to eat that cheese.
• 37:36
  Speaker 1: I'm your host, michael Gillespie of the WDYM.
• 37:39
  Speaker 1: You guys have a great day.
• 37:41
  Speaker 1: I am out.
• 37:41
  Speaker 1: Girl Scout, boy Scout.
• 37:43
  Speaker 1: Peace out out.