Latest / The Iconic Midlife with Roxy Manning / Owning My Truth: Chely Wright on Fear, Faith, and Finally Being Free

Transcript

Owning My Truth: Chely Wright on Fear, Faith, and Finally Being Free · The Iconic Midlife with Roxy Manning

0:00
I
0:00
told
0:00
everyone.
0:01
You
0:01
didn't
0:01
tell.
0:01
I'm
0:02
taking
0:02
back
0:02
the
0:02
whispers,
0:03
and
0:03
I'm
0:04
owning
0:04
my
0:04
truth
0:04
in
0:05
a
0:05
way
0:05
that
0:05
I'm
0:05
going
0:06
to.
0:06
I'm
0:06
going
0:06
to
0:06
go
0:07
on
0:07
Oprah,
0:07
wherever
0:08
they'll
0:08
have
0:08
me.
0:09
I'm
0:09
going
0:09
to
0:09
tell
0:09
this
0:10
story.
0:10
How
0:10
powerful.
0:11
I
0:11
mean,
0:11
that
0:11
was
0:11
something
0:12
you
0:12
had
0:12
to
0:12
do.
0:13
You
0:13
had
0:13
to
0:14
do
0:14
it.
0:14
What
0:14
a
0:15
place
0:15
of
0:15
fear
0:16
that
0:16
I
0:16
was
0:16
kind
0:16
of
0:17
navigating.
0:18
It
0:18
breaks
0:18
my
0:19
heart
0:19
for
0:20
kids
0:20
that
0:20
are
0:21
still
0:21
doing
0:21
that.
0:22
It
0:22
breaks
0:22
my
0:23
heart
0:23
for
0:23
the
0:24
little
0:24
me.
0:25
And
0:25
that's
0:25
one
0:25
of
0:25
the
0:26
beauties,
0:26
too,
0:26
of
0:26
maturing
0:27
and
0:27
getting
0:27
older.
0:28
You
0:29
don't
0:29
care,
0:29
like,
0:30
what
0:30
people
0:30
think
0:30
as
0:31
much.
0:32
Stop
0:32
you
0:32
in
0:32
your
0:32
tracks
0:33
like
0:33
it
0:33
did.
0:33
My
0:34
faith
0:34
has
0:34
been
0:35
a
0:36
constant
0:36
in
0:36
my
0:37
life,
0:37
so
0:37
I
0:37
want
0:38
to
0:38
separate
0:38
faith
0:39
from
0:39
religion.
0:39
That
0:40
moment
0:40
could
0:40
have
0:41
meant
0:41
the
0:41
difference
0:42
between,
0:42
you
0:42
know,
0:43
somebody
0:44
caring
0:44
and
0:44
not
0:44
caring.
0:45
It's
0:45
so
0:45
important.
0:46
And
0:46
I'm
0:46
good.
0:47
I'm
0:47
good
0:47
at
0:47
it.
0:47
Very
0:47
good.
0:48
Someday
0:48
you
0:48
are
0:48
good
0:49
singer.
0:49
Yes,
0:49
lady,
0:50
you
0:50
are.
0:56
Today
0:56
on
0:56
the
0:57
iconic
0:57
Midlife,
0:58
I'm
0:58
joined
0:58
by
0:59
a
0:59
woman
0:59
who
0:59
is
0:59
not
0:59
only
1:00
a
1:00
trailblazer
1:01
in
1:01
country
1:01
music,
1:02
but
1:02
a
1:03
truth
1:03
teller,
1:04
a
1:04
change
1:04
maker,
1:05
and
1:05
an
1:05
unapologetic
1:06
force
1:07
of
1:07
nature.
1:08
Shelley
1:08
Wright
1:09
made
1:09
history
1:09
as
1:10
the
1:10
first
1:10
major
1:11
country
1:11
music
1:12
star
1:12
to
1:13
come
1:13
out
1:13
publicly,
1:14
shattering
1:15
silence,
1:15
breaking
1:16
barriers,
1:17
and
1:17
inspiring
1:18
a
1:18
generation
1:18
with
1:19
her
1:19
courage.
1:20
She's
1:20
a
1:21
celebrated
1:21
singer,
1:22
songwriter,
1:22
an
1:23
advocate
1:23
for
1:24
LGBTQ
1:25
rights
1:26
and
1:26
mental
1:27
health,
1:27
a
1:28
devoted
1:28
mom,
1:29
and
1:29
now
1:29
has
1:30
become
1:30
a
1:30
part
1:30
of
1:30
the
1:31
corporate
1:31
world
1:32
and
1:32
is
1:32
the
1:33
walking
1:33
definition
1:34
of
1:34
reinvention
1:35
done
1:36
right.
1:36
We're
1:37
diving
1:37
deep
1:37
into
1:38
identity,
1:39
artistry,
1:40
motherhood,
1:41
midlife
1:41
shifts,
1:42
and
1:42
what
1:43
it
1:43
really
1:43
means
1:44
to
1:44
live
1:44
authentically,
1:45
even
1:46
when
1:46
the
1:46
world
1:46
isn't
1:47
ready
1:47
for
1:47
it.
1:48
So
1:48
grab
1:49
your
1:49
headphones
1:50
and
1:50
get
1:50
ready
1:51
for
1:51
some
1:51
serious
1:52
truths.
1:52
And
1:53
a
1:53
whole
1:53
lot
1:54
of
1:54
inspiration
1:55
from
1:55
the
1:55
Amazing
1:56
Shelly
1:56
writes.
1:58
Welcome
1:58
to
1:58
the
1:59
iconic
1:59
Midlife.
2:00
I'm
2:01
so
2:01
thrilled
2:02
to
2:02
have
2:02
you.
2:03
How
2:03
are
2:03
you
2:03
doing
2:03
today?
2:04
I'm
2:04
great.
2:04
Number
2:04
one.
2:05
I'm
2:05
so
2:05
delighted
2:06
to
2:06
be
2:06
here.
2:07
When
2:07
I
2:07
learned
2:07
of
2:07
your
2:07
podcast
2:08
and
2:08
what
2:08
you're
2:09
doing
2:09
and
2:09
the
2:10
conversations
2:10
you're
2:11
having
2:11
intentionally,
2:14
I
2:14
got
2:14
so
2:14
excited,
2:15
and
2:15
I
2:15
was,
2:15
like,
2:16
fangirling.
2:16
I've
2:17
got
2:17
to
2:17
be
2:17
on
2:17
that
2:17
podcast.
2:18
So
2:18
thank
2:18
you
2:18
for
2:18
allowing
2:19
me
2:19
to
2:19
come
2:19
on.
2:20
Oh,
2:20
my
2:20
gosh.
2:20
Well,
2:20
absolutely.
2:21
And
2:21
I
2:21
feel
2:22
the
2:22
same
2:22
about
2:22
you.
2:22
I
2:23
feel
2:23
like
2:23
I'm
2:23
fangirling,
2:24
too.
2:25
So,
2:25
you
2:25
know,
2:25
you
2:26
had
2:26
such
2:26
an
2:26
amazing
2:27
career.
2:27
People
2:27
got
2:28
to
2:28
know
2:28
you
2:28
during
2:29
all
2:29
of
2:29
your
2:30
country.
2:30
You
2:30
know,
2:30
music,
2:31
singing.
2:31
You
2:31
had
2:32
so
2:32
many
2:32
great
2:32
hits.
2:33
But
2:33
I
2:34
think
2:34
the
2:34
time
2:35
when
2:35
everything
2:35
just
2:36
totally
2:36
exploded
2:37
is
2:38
when
2:38
you
2:38
spoke
2:39
your
2:39
truth
2:40
and
2:40
you
2:40
Came
2:41
out
2:41
of
2:41
the
2:41
closet.
2:41
And
2:42
I
2:42
remember
2:43
watching
2:43
that
2:43
Oprah
2:44
episode
2:44
like,
2:45
you
2:45
do.
2:45
I
2:45
do.
2:46
It
2:46
was
2:46
so
2:47
moving
2:47
because
2:48
it
2:48
was
2:48
so
2:49
raw,
2:49
and
2:49
it
2:49
was
2:50
so
2:50
real
2:50
for
2:51
you.
2:52
And
2:52
for
2:53
those.
2:53
You
2:53
know,
2:53
that
2:54
was
2:54
in
2:54
2010.
2:55
So
2:55
that
2:55
was
2:55
kind
2:55
of
2:55
like
2:56
pretty
2:56
pre
2:56
social
2:56
media.
2:57
Right?
2:57
It
2:58
had
2:58
it,
2:58
like,
2:59
really
2:59
gotten
3:00
so
3:00
crazy
3:00
like
3:01
it
3:01
is
3:01
now.
3:01
So
3:02
everybody
3:02
watched
3:02
Oprah.
3:03
Like,
3:03
that's
3:03
true.
3:04
Yeah.
3:04
Right.
3:05
People
3:06
television,
3:07
network
3:07
tv.
3:07
And
3:07
it
3:08
was
3:08
back
3:08
before
3:08
Oprah
3:09
had
3:09
her
3:09
Oprah
3:10
network.
3:10
It
3:10
was
3:10
on
3:10
network
3:11
tv,
3:12
and
3:12
you
3:13
really
3:13
did.
3:13
It
3:14
was
3:14
kind
3:14
of
3:14
appointment
3:15
viewing
3:15
with
3:15
tv.
3:16
People
3:16
watched
3:16
it.
3:17
They
3:17
really
3:17
watched
3:18
it.
3:18
And
3:18
you
3:18
were
3:18
also
3:19
on
3:19
Ellen
3:19
DeGeneres.
3:20
I
3:20
mean,
3:20
so
3:20
many.
3:21
So
3:21
many
3:21
great
3:21
things.
3:22
Were
3:23
you
3:23
ready
3:23
for
3:23
all
3:24
of
3:24
the
3:24
media
3:24
attention
3:25
and
3:26
the
3:26
spotlight?
3:27
Because
3:27
you
3:28
obviously
3:28
had
3:28
already
3:28
been
3:29
in
3:29
the
3:29
spotlight
3:29
with
3:30
your
3:30
music
3:30
career,
3:30
but
3:31
that
3:31
kind
3:31
of
3:31
a.
3:31
Like,
3:32
really,
3:32
like
3:32
a
3:33
spot
3:33
spotlight.
3:34
It's
3:35
a
3:35
great
3:35
question,
3:35
Roxy.
3:36
And
3:36
when
3:36
you.
3:37
When
3:37
you
3:37
grow
3:37
up,
3:39
from
3:39
a
3:39
kid,
3:39
being
3:40
a
3:40
kid
3:40
in
3:40
Kansas
3:41
at
3:41
age
3:41
4,
3:41
I
3:41
said,
3:41
I'm
3:42
gonna
3:42
be
3:42
on
3:42
the
3:42
Grand
3:42
Ole
3:42
Opry.
3:43
I'm
3:43
gonna
3:43
be
3:44
a
3:44
country
3:44
music
3:44
singer.
3:45
When
3:45
you
3:45
think
3:46
about
3:47
those
3:47
kind
3:47
of
3:48
thresholds
3:49
of
3:49
achievement,
3:51
being
3:51
on
3:51
the
3:51
radio,
3:52
tv,
3:52
magazines,
3:53
all
3:53
of
3:53
that,
3:53
newspapers,
3:54
it
3:54
is.
3:55
I
3:55
don't
3:56
think
3:56
anyone
3:56
ever
3:57
goes
3:57
into
3:57
it
3:58
so
3:58
they
3:58
can
3:58
get
3:58
on
3:58
TV
3:59
or
3:59
so
4:00
they
4:00
can
4:00
be
4:00
famous,
4:00
but
4:01
it
4:01
is
4:01
a
4:02
metric
4:03
of
4:03
how
4:03
well
4:04
you're
4:04
doing
4:04
with
4:04
your
4:05
art,
4:05
your
4:05
craft,
4:06
and
4:06
it
4:06
also,
4:07
when
4:07
you
4:08
have
4:08
those
4:08
media
4:09
achievements,
4:10
it
4:10
means
4:10
you
4:11
get
4:11
to
4:11
keep
4:11
doing
4:11
the
4:11
job
4:12
a
4:12
little
4:12
bit
4:12
longer,
4:13
which
4:13
is
4:13
what
4:13
we
4:14
artists
4:14
all
4:14
look
4:15
for.
4:16
Had
4:16
you
4:16
asked
4:16
me
4:17
When
4:17
I
4:17
was
4:17
15,
4:17
did
4:18
I
4:18
ever
4:19
want
4:19
to
4:19
go
4:19
on
4:20
TV
4:20
to
4:20
talk
4:20
about
4:21
the
4:21
fact
4:21
that
4:21
I'm
4:22
gay,
4:22
I
4:22
would
4:23
have
4:23
just
4:23
as
4:23
soon,
4:24
you
4:24
know,
4:24
jumped
4:25
off
4:25
the
4:26
steep
4:26
cliff.
4:29
That
4:29
said,
4:29
when
4:30
I
4:30
decided
4:30
to
4:31
come
4:31
out
4:31
and
4:31
when
4:32
I
4:32
decided
4:32
to
4:32
come
4:33
out
4:33
the
4:33
way
4:33
I
4:33
came
4:34
out
4:34
to
4:34
answer
4:35
your
4:35
question,
4:36
was
4:36
I
4:36
ready
4:37
for
4:37
it?
4:37
Yeah,
4:37
I
4:38
was
4:38
ready
4:38
for
4:38
it,
4:38
and
4:39
I
4:39
knew
4:39
I
4:39
needed
4:40
to
4:40
do
4:40
it
4:40
that
4:40
way
4:41
because
4:41
I
4:42
had
4:42
a
4:43
pretty
4:43
interesting
4:44
story
4:45
to
4:45
tell.
4:46
I
4:46
often
4:46
joke
4:47
that
4:47
I
4:47
could
4:47
have
4:47
tweeted,
4:48
hey,
4:48
y',
4:48
all,
4:48
I'm
4:48
gay.
4:48
Or
4:49
myspaced,
4:49
hey,
4:49
y',
4:50
all,
4:50
I'm
4:50
gay.
4:51
But
4:51
I
4:52
needed
4:52
to
4:52
tell
4:53
the
4:54
whole
4:55
story,
4:55
which
4:55
was
4:55
that
4:56
I
4:56
am
4:56
a
4:56
person
4:57
of
4:57
faith
4:57
that's
4:58
gay.
4:58
I
4:58
am
4:59
a
4:59
kid
4:59
that
4:59
grew
4:59
up
4:59
loving
5:00
the
5:00
Grand
5:00
Ole
5:00
Opry
5:01
and
5:01
country
5:01
music.
5:01
I'm
5:02
gay.
5:02
I
5:02
have
5:02
been
5:03
supportive
5:03
of
5:03
the
5:03
troops,
5:04
and
5:04
I'm
5:04
the
5:04
salt
5:05
of
5:05
the
5:05
earth
5:05
kind
5:05
of
5:06
Midwestern
5:07
roots
5:08
person,
5:08
but.
5:08
And
5:09
I'm
5:09
also
5:09
gay,
5:09
and
5:09
I
5:10
always
5:10
knew
5:10
it.
5:10
And.
5:12
And
5:13
I'm
5:13
broken
5:14
in
5:14
the
5:14
many
5:15
ways
5:15
that
5:15
humans
5:15
are.
5:16
But
5:17
my
5:17
brokenness
5:18
is
5:18
my
5:19
being
5:19
gay
5:19
has
5:20
nothing
5:20
to
5:20
do
5:20
with
5:21
my
5:21
humanity
5:22
and
5:22
being
5:22
broken.
5:23
It's
5:23
just
5:23
a.
5:23
It's
5:24
a
5:24
really
5:24
important
5:24
part
5:25
of
5:25
who
5:25
I
5:25
am.
5:26
And
5:26
so
5:26
I
5:27
was
5:27
ready
5:27
for
5:27
it
5:27
because
5:28
I
5:29
walked
5:29
willingly
5:30
into
5:31
that
5:31
readiness
5:32
that
5:32
I'm
5:32
going
5:32
to
5:33
be.
5:33
I'm
5:33
gonna
5:33
be
5:34
telling
5:34
my
5:34
whole
5:34
truth
5:35
anywhere
5:36
anyone
5:36
can
5:36
allow
5:37
me
5:37
to
5:37
do
5:37
it,
5:37
because
5:37
it's
5:38
an
5:38
important.
5:39
I
5:39
thought
5:39
it
5:39
was
5:39
an
5:40
important
5:40
story
5:40
to
5:40
tell.
5:41
Absolutely.
5:41
You're
5:42
such
5:42
a
5:42
trailblaz
5:43
at
5:43
that
5:43
time.
5:44
I
5:44
feel
5:44
like
5:44
you
5:44
were
5:45
the
5:45
first
5:46
country
5:46
music
5:47
singer
5:47
that
5:48
really
5:48
came
5:48
out
5:49
and,
5:49
you
5:49
know,
5:50
spoke
5:50
your
5:50
truth.
5:51
I
5:51
was
5:51
the
5:51
first.
5:52
And
5:54
despite
5:54
how
5:55
anyone
5:55
wanted
5:55
to
5:56
frame
5:56
it
5:56
afterward
5:57
in
5:57
the
5:57
industry,
5:58
like,
5:58
well,
5:58
we
5:58
knew
5:59
well,
6:00
the
6:00
fans.
6:01
I
6:01
told
6:01
everyone.
6:02
You
6:02
didn't
6:02
tell.
6:03
You
6:03
didn't
6:03
whisper
6:03
about
6:04
me
6:05
anymore.
6:05
I'm
6:05
taking
6:06
back
6:06
the
6:06
whispers,
6:07
and
6:07
I'm
6:07
owning
6:08
my
6:08
truth
6:08
in
6:08
a
6:08
way
6:08
that
6:09
I'm
6:09
going
6:09
to.
6:10
I'm
6:10
gonna
6:10
go
6:10
on
6:10
Oprah.
6:11
I'm
6:11
going
6:11
to
6:12
wherever
6:12
they'll
6:12
have
6:12
me.
6:13
I'm
6:13
going
6:13
to
6:13
tell
6:14
this
6:14
story
6:14
that's.
6:15
Really
6:15
powerful
6:15
because
6:16
I
6:16
can
6:16
imagine
6:16
also,
6:17
you
6:17
know,
6:17
you
6:17
are
6:18
this
6:18
public
6:18
person
6:18
in
6:19
the
6:19
country,
6:20
western
6:21
music,
6:21
you
6:21
know,
6:22
world.
6:23
It
6:23
hasn't
6:24
really
6:24
been
6:24
known
6:24
for
6:24
being
6:24
accepting
6:25
of,
6:25
you
6:26
know,
6:26
things
6:26
like
6:27
that.
6:27
So,
6:27
I
6:27
mean,
6:28
how
6:28
did
6:28
you
6:28
kind
6:28
of
6:29
wrestle
6:29
with
6:30
that?
6:30
Like,
6:30
was
6:31
that
6:31
ever
6:32
something
6:32
that
6:32
held
6:32
you
6:33
back,
6:33
or
6:33
were
6:34
you
6:34
just
6:35
all
6:35
in,
6:35
like,
6:35
you
6:35
just
6:36
knew
6:36
you
6:36
had
6:36
to
6:36
do
6:36
it?
6:37
I
6:38
wrestled
6:38
with
6:38
it
6:39
for
6:39
a
6:40
lot
6:40
of
6:40
years.
6:40
I
6:41
mean,
6:41
I
6:41
was
6:41
four
6:42
when
6:42
I
6:42
decided
6:42
I
6:43
wanted
6:43
to
6:43
be
6:43
a
6:43
country
6:43
music
6:44
artist.
6:45
I
6:45
was
6:45
nine
6:45
when
6:46
I
6:46
realized
6:46
I
6:46
was
6:46
gay.
6:48
I
6:48
was
6:48
18
6:49
when
6:49
I
6:49
moved
6:49
to
6:49
Nashville.
6:51
I
6:51
was
6:51
22
6:53
and
6:53
a
6:53
half
6:53
when
6:53
I
6:53
signed
6:54
my
6:54
first
6:54
writer's
6:55
deal,
6:55
and
6:55
then
6:56
my
6:56
record
6:56
deal
6:56
would
6:57
come
6:57
shortly
6:57
after
6:57
it.
6:58
When
6:58
you
6:59
are
6:59
kind
6:59
of
6:59
organizing
7:00
and
7:00
inventorying
7:01
your
7:01
life
7:02
as
7:02
a
7:02
queer,
7:03
closeted
7:04
person
7:05
who
7:05
wants
7:05
to
7:06
make
7:06
it
7:06
in
7:06
country
7:07
music,
7:08
you
7:08
make
7:08
these
7:08
big,
7:09
grand
7:09
deals.
7:10
And
7:10
my
7:10
big,
7:11
grand
7:11
deal
7:11
that
7:11
I
7:12
made
7:12
about
7:13
my
7:13
life
7:13
and
7:13
my
7:13
deal
7:14
with
7:14
God
7:14
and
7:14
my
7:15
maker,
7:15
whatever,
7:15
you
7:16
know,
7:16
however
7:16
people
7:16
look
7:17
at
7:17
it,
7:18
I
7:18
just
7:18
thought
7:18
that's
7:19
something
7:19
I
7:19
could
7:19
hide.
7:20
When
7:20
you're
7:21
18
7:21
and
7:21
19
7:22
and
7:22
14,
7:23
cutting
7:23
deals
7:24
with
7:24
God,
7:24
it's
7:25
easy
7:25
to
7:25
say,
7:25
well,
7:26
I'll
7:26
just
7:26
hide
7:27
that.
7:28
And
7:28
then
7:28
life
7:29
happens.
7:29
And
7:29
then
7:30
you.
7:30
You
7:31
begin
7:31
to
7:31
understand
7:32
how
7:32
important
7:33
companionship
7:33
and
7:34
authenticity
7:34
are.
7:35
And
7:35
so
7:35
in
7:36
my
7:36
20s
7:36
and
7:37
30s,
7:37
I
7:37
just
7:37
thought,
7:38
this
7:38
is
7:39
something
7:39
I
7:39
have
7:39
to
7:39
take
7:40
to
7:40
my
7:40
grave.
7:40
And
7:40
then
7:41
by
7:41
the
7:41
time
7:42
I
7:42
realized
7:42
my
7:43
grave
7:43
might
7:43
come
7:44
much
7:44
sooner
7:46
if
7:46
I
7:46
Don't.
7:47
If
7:47
I
7:47
don't
7:48
deal
7:48
with
7:48
who
7:48
I
7:49
am.
7:51
And
7:51
I
7:51
was
7:51
also
7:52
very
7:52
proud
7:52
of
7:52
who
7:53
I
7:53
am
7:53
as
7:53
a
7:53
person.
7:54
Being
7:54
gay
7:55
wasn't
7:55
a
7:55
point
7:55
of
7:55
shame
7:56
for
7:56
me.
7:56
It
7:56
was
7:56
early
7:57
on.
7:57
But
7:57
when
7:57
I
7:58
realized,
7:58
I
7:58
don't
7:59
think
7:59
I'm
7:59
going
7:59
to
7:59
hell
7:59
for
8:00
this.
8:00
I
8:00
think
8:00
I'm
8:00
exactly
8:01
as
8:01
God
8:01
made
8:01
me.
8:04
It
8:04
really.
8:05
It
8:05
was
8:05
a.
8:06
It
8:06
was
8:06
really
8:06
hard
8:07
for
8:07
me
8:08
to
8:08
act
8:09
shameful
8:10
about
8:10
who
8:10
I
8:10
am
8:11
when
8:11
I'm
8:11
not
8:11
ashamed
8:12
of
8:12
who
8:12
I
8:12
am.
8:13
And
8:13
so
8:15
I
8:15
did
8:15
wrestle
8:16
with
8:16
it
8:16
until
8:16
the
8:17
day
8:17
I
8:17
nearly
8:18
ended
8:18
my
8:18
life
8:18
and
8:19
the
8:19
morning
8:19
after
8:19
I
8:20
didn't
8:20
end
8:20
my
8:21
life.
8:21
It
8:21
was
8:21
like,
8:21
I'm
8:22
either
8:22
going
8:23
to
8:23
not
8:24
survive
8:24
the
8:24
closet
8:25
at
8:25
the
8:25
hand
8:25
of
8:26
my.
8:27
I
8:27
had
8:27
a
8:27
gun
8:27
that
8:28
my
8:28
parents
8:28
had
8:28
given
8:29
me
8:29
for
8:29
safety.
8:31
So
8:31
I'm
8:31
either
8:31
going
8:31
to
8:32
pull
8:33
the
8:33
trigger
8:33
and
8:33
I
8:34
say
8:34
that
8:34
knowing
8:35
that
8:37
that's
8:37
a
8:37
big
8:37
thing
8:37
to
8:38
say,
8:39
or
8:40
I'm
8:40
going
8:40
to
8:40
come
8:41
out.
8:41
And
8:41
not
8:41
only
8:41
am
8:42
I
8:42
going
8:42
to
8:42
come
8:42
out,
8:42
I'm
8:42
going
8:43
to
8:43
come
8:43
out
8:43
well.
8:44
And
8:44
that
8:44
began
8:44
my
8:45
just
8:45
figuring
8:45
out,
8:46
how
8:46
do
8:46
I
8:46
unravel
8:48
this
8:48
explicit,
8:49
implicit
8:50
truth,
8:52
a
8:52
lie
8:52
essentially,
8:53
that
8:53
I
8:53
told
8:54
the
8:54
world?
8:55
How
8:56
do
8:56
I
8:56
unravel
8:57
that
8:57
in
8:57
a
8:57
way
8:57
that
8:57
has
8:58
integrity,
8:59
authenticity,
9:00
productivity?
9:02
How
9:02
do
9:02
I
9:02
use
9:03
my
9:03
public
9:04
capital
9:05
to
9:06
do
9:06
some
9:06
good
9:06
and
9:07
free
9:07
myself
9:07
of
9:08
this
9:08
just
9:08
albatross
9:09
that
9:10
I'd
9:10
tied
9:11
around
9:11
myself?
9:12
Did
9:13
you
9:13
have
9:13
any
9:13
regrets
9:14
from
9:14
that
9:14
moment
9:15
in
9:15
time
9:15
or
9:15
from
9:16
that
9:16
time
9:16
period
9:17
when,
9:17
you
9:17
know,
9:17
everything
9:18
was
9:18
kind
9:18
of
9:18
coming
9:19
out?
9:20
It's
9:20
a
9:20
great
9:20
question.
9:22
The
9:23
way
9:23
I
9:23
came
9:23
out
9:24
was
9:24
criticized
9:24
in
9:25
certain
9:25
circles
9:26
and
9:26
corners.
9:27
No,
9:27
I
9:27
got
9:27
a
9:28
lot
9:28
of
9:28
support
9:28
and
9:28
a
9:29
lot
9:29
of,
9:29
oh,
9:29
my
9:29
gosh,
9:30
way
9:30
to
9:30
go.
9:30
That
9:30
was
9:31
incredible.
9:31
You
9:31
helped
9:32
me
9:32
or
9:32
you
9:32
helped
9:33
my
9:33
mom
9:33
see
9:33
this
9:34
differently
9:34
or.
9:36
But
9:36
there
9:37
were
9:37
criticisms
9:38
about
9:38
how
9:38
I
9:39
came
9:39
out,
9:40
including,
9:41
but
9:41
not
9:41
limited
9:42
to
9:42
she
9:42
did
9:42
it
9:43
for
9:43
the
9:43
money.
9:43
I'm
9:43
like,
9:44
what
9:44
money?
9:44
Like,
9:45
what
9:45
are
9:45
you
9:45
people.
9:46
What
9:46
are
9:46
you
9:46
talking
9:46
about?
9:47
Right.
9:47
If
9:47
it
9:47
was
9:47
such
9:48
a.
9:49
Such
9:49
a
9:50
lucrative
9:51
decision,
9:52
all
9:52
the
9:52
queer
9:53
country
9:53
artists
9:53
before
9:54
me
9:54
would
9:54
have
9:54
come
9:54
out.
9:55
Um,
9:55
anyway,
9:56
it's
9:56
kind
9:56
of
9:57
funny
9:57
that
9:57
anyone
9:57
would
9:58
say
9:58
that,
9:58
but
10:00
including,
10:00
you
10:01
know,
10:01
what
10:01
was.
10:02
Seemed
10:02
too
10:02
coordinated.
10:03
Well,
10:04
I'm
10:05
a
10:05
coordinated.
10:05
I'm
10:06
a
10:06
strategic
10:06
person.
10:07
I
10:07
had
10:07
a
10:07
paper
10:08
route
10:08
when
10:08
I
10:08
was
10:08
a
10:08
kid.
10:08
I
10:09
was
10:09
strategic
10:09
about
10:09
my
10:10
paper
10:10
route.
10:10
I
10:11
was
10:11
strategic
10:11
about
10:12
how
10:12
I
10:13
did
10:13
gigs
10:13
when
10:14
I
10:14
was
10:14
in
10:14
high
10:14
school
10:14
with
10:15
my
10:15
band.
10:15
I
10:15
was
10:15
strategic
10:16
about
10:17
getting
10:17
to
10:17
Nashville
10:18
and
10:18
realizing
10:19
I'm
10:20
not
10:20
the
10:20
best
10:20
country
10:21
singer
10:21
in
10:21
a
10:21
hundred
10:22
mile
10:22
radius.
10:22
I
10:23
was
10:23
in
10:23
Kansas.
10:24
But
10:24
when
10:24
I
10:24
got
10:24
to
10:24
Nashville,
10:25
everybody
10:26
was
10:26
good.
10:26
And
10:27
my
10:27
strategy
10:28
hat
10:28
went
10:28
on
10:28
And
10:29
I
10:29
was
10:29
like,
10:29
okay,
10:30
I
10:31
won't
10:31
be
10:31
outworked.
10:31
I
10:32
might
10:32
be.
10:32
There
10:32
may
10:32
be
10:33
better
10:33
singers,
10:33
better
10:34
songwriters,
10:34
but
10:34
I'm
10:35
gonna
10:35
learn
10:35
the
10:35
business.
10:36
I'm
10:36
going
10:36
to
10:37
learn
10:37
my
10:37
craft,
10:37
get
10:38
better
10:38
at
10:38
my
10:38
craft,
10:39
and
10:39
I'm
10:39
gonna
10:39
put
10:39
on
10:40
that
10:40
strategy
10:40
hat,
10:41
and
10:41
I'm
10:41
gonna
10:41
find
10:42
a
10:42
way
10:42
to
10:42
get
10:42
this
10:42
done.
10:43
And
10:43
I
10:43
did.
10:43
So
10:44
just
10:44
kind
10:44
of
10:45
in
10:45
keeping
10:45
with
10:45
the
10:46
way
10:46
that
10:46
I
10:46
think
10:46
and
10:47
the
10:47
way
10:47
that
10:47
I
10:47
was
10:48
raised
10:49
was
10:49
plan
10:50
your
10:50
work
10:50
and
10:51
work
10:51
your
10:51
plan,
10:52
and
10:52
that
10:52
included
10:53
how
10:53
I
10:54
came
10:54
out.
10:55
There
10:55
was
10:56
a
10:56
very
10:56
strategic
10:57
way
10:58
to
11:00
tell
11:00
my
11:00
story
11:00
and
11:01
to
11:01
affect
11:02
positive
11:02
change
11:02
for
11:03
people
11:03
like
11:03
me
11:03
and
11:04
for
11:04
people
11:04
who
11:04
love
11:05
people
11:05
like
11:05
me.
11:06
Absolutely.
11:07
And
11:07
what
11:08
would
11:08
you
11:08
say
11:08
to
11:08
somebody
11:09
who
11:09
is
11:09
on
11:09
their
11:09
own
11:10
coming
11:10
out
11:10
journey?
11:10
Maybe
11:11
they're
11:11
not
11:11
out
11:11
yet,
11:12
but
11:12
they
11:12
want
11:12
to
11:12
come
11:13
out
11:13
to
11:13
their
11:13
family,
11:13
their
11:14
friends,
11:14
you
11:14
know,
11:14
their
11:15
loved
11:15
ones.
11:16
What
11:16
do
11:16
you
11:16
say
11:16
to
11:16
them
11:16
if
11:17
they
11:17
still
11:17
feel
11:18
like
11:18
they're
11:18
being,
11:18
you
11:18
know,
11:19
they're
11:19
held
11:19
back
11:19
a
11:19
bit?
11:20
Yeah.
11:20
I'm
11:21
lucky
11:21
since
11:21
I
11:21
came
11:22
out
11:22
to
11:22
have
11:23
been
11:23
a
11:23
person
11:25
that
11:25
people
11:25
talk
11:25
to
11:26
about
11:26
this,
11:26
whether
11:26
they
11:27
be
11:27
other
11:28
publicly
11:28
known
11:28
people
11:29
or
11:29
people
11:29
who
11:29
come
11:30
to
11:30
my
11:30
shows
11:30
and
11:30
wait
11:31
till
11:31
afterward
11:32
to
11:32
talk
11:32
to
11:32
me
11:33
and
11:33
share
11:33
their
11:33
story
11:34
or
11:34
write
11:35
to
11:35
me.
11:35
And
11:36
I
11:36
feel
11:36
very
11:37
honored
11:37
to
11:38
have
11:38
people
11:38
ask
11:39
me,
11:39
what
11:39
is
11:39
your
11:39
advice
11:40
on
11:40
coming
11:40
out?
11:41
My
11:42
North
11:42
Star
11:43
is
11:44
do
11:44
not
11:44
come
11:45
out
11:45
until
11:45
you
11:46
feel
11:46
safe
11:47
and
11:47
able.
11:49
And
11:49
those
11:50
criteria
11:51
are
11:51
very
11:51
different
11:52
for
11:52
a
11:52
lot
11:53
of.
11:54
It's.
11:54
It's
11:54
a
11:54
sliding
11:55
scale
11:55
for
11:55
a
11:56
lot
11:56
of
11:56
different
11:56
people.
11:56
Right.
11:57
So
11:57
if
11:57
you're
11:57
living
11:57
in
11:58
the
11:59
rural
11:59
south
12:00
or,
12:01
you
12:01
know,
12:01
the
12:01
rural
12:02
Northeast,
12:03
and
12:04
anywhere
12:04
an
12:04
hour
12:05
outside
12:05
of
12:05
a
12:06
major
12:06
metropolitan
12:07
area,
12:07
you're
12:07
in
12:08
the
12:08
country.
12:08
And
12:09
so
12:09
I
12:09
do
12:10
not
12:10
say,
12:10
yeah,
12:11
just
12:11
get
12:11
a
12:11
gay
12:11
pride
12:12
flag
12:12
and
12:12
run
12:13
down
12:13
the
12:13
middle
12:13
of
12:13
Main
12:13
Street.
12:14
That
12:14
does
12:15
not
12:15
meet
12:16
the
12:16
criteria
12:16
of
12:17
safe
12:17
and
12:17
able.
12:19
Those
12:19
of
12:19
us
12:19
with
12:20
resources,
12:22
which
12:22
is
12:22
a
12:22
privilege.
12:25
A
12:25
lot
12:25
of
12:25
us
12:26
moved
12:26
out
12:26
of
12:26
our
12:26
small
12:27
towns.
12:27
Right.
12:28
But
12:28
moving
12:28
out
12:28
of
12:29
your
12:29
small
12:29
town
12:29
requires
12:31
resources
12:32
and
12:33
opportunities.
12:34
So
12:35
don't
12:35
come
12:35
out
12:36
until
12:36
you've
12:37
thought
12:37
it
12:37
through
12:37
and
12:38
you
12:38
feel
12:38
safe
12:38
and
12:39
able.
12:39
You.
12:40
And.
12:40
And
12:41
I
12:41
will
12:41
say
12:41
that
12:43
be.
12:44
Be
12:44
mindful
12:45
about
12:45
who
12:45
your
12:46
people
12:46
are
12:46
in
12:47
terms
12:47
of
12:47
who
12:47
you
12:47
think
12:48
might
12:48
be
12:48
an
12:48
ally.
12:49
And,
12:49
you
12:50
know,
12:50
it's.
12:50
Again,
12:50
I
12:51
wouldn't
12:51
recommend
12:52
to
12:52
most
12:52
people
12:52
to
12:52
go
12:53
to
12:53
their
12:53
Twitter,
12:53
their
12:53
MySpace,
12:54
and
12:54
many
12:55
people
12:55
do
12:55
many
12:55
people
12:56
declare
12:56
it
12:56
on
12:57
National
12:57
Coming
12:57
Out
12:58
Day.
12:58
Right.
12:58
There
12:58
are
12:58
days
12:59
that
12:59
are
13:00
meant
13:00
to
13:00
create
13:01
a
13:01
framework
13:01
and
13:02
a
13:02
kind
13:02
of
13:02
let's
13:02
jump
13:03
together
13:04
kind
13:05
of
13:05
movement.
13:06
And
13:06
I
13:06
love.
13:07
I
13:07
love
13:07
those
13:08
movements.
13:08
But
13:09
I
13:09
often
13:09
wonder
13:10
about
13:10
the
13:10
UN
13:12
risks
13:13
of
13:14
telling
13:14
people
13:14
it's
13:14
coming
13:15
out
13:15
day
13:15
Throw
13:16
caution
13:16
to
13:16
the
13:16
wind.
13:17
Because
13:19
in
13:19
a
13:20
lot
13:20
of
13:20
places
13:20
in
13:20
America
13:21
and
13:21
around
13:22
the
13:22
world,
13:23
coming
13:23
out
13:23
can
13:24
mean
13:24
that
13:25
you
13:25
lose
13:25
your
13:26
housing,
13:26
it
13:27
can
13:27
mean
13:27
that
13:28
you
13:28
are
13:28
excommunicated
13:29
from
13:29
your
13:29
church,
13:30
it
13:30
can
13:30
mean
13:31
that
13:31
your
13:31
parents
13:31
kick
13:32
you
13:32
out
13:32
of
13:32
the
13:32
house.
13:33
It
13:33
can
13:33
mean
13:34
that
13:34
you
13:34
have
13:34
a
13:34
hard
13:35
time
13:35
showing
13:35
up
13:35
at
13:36
work
13:36
and
13:37
at
13:37
school.
13:37
So
13:38
I
13:39
think
13:39
a
13:40
measured,
13:41
strategic,
13:43
careful
13:44
approach
13:44
is
13:45
important
13:45
for
13:46
all.
13:46
That's
13:46
my
13:47
best
13:47
advice.
13:48
That's
13:48
the
13:48
best
13:48
advice.
13:49
That's
13:49
actually
13:49
great
13:49
advice.
13:50
Be
13:50
prepared
13:50
and
13:51
be
13:51
ready
13:51
like
13:51
before,
13:52
you
13:52
know.
13:52
Yeah.
13:53
How
13:54
much
13:54
did
13:54
you
13:54
rely
13:54
on
13:54
your
13:55
faith
13:55
during
13:55
that
13:55
time?
13:56
Was
13:57
that
13:57
just.
13:57
And
13:57
is
13:57
that
13:58
something
13:58
that's
13:58
still
13:58
constant
13:59
in
13:59
your
13:59
life?
14:00
I'm
14:00
really
14:00
lucky,
14:01
Roxy,
14:02
in
14:02
that
14:02
my
14:02
faith
14:03
has
14:03
been
14:04
a
14:04
constant
14:05
in
14:05
my
14:05
life.
14:06
So
14:06
I
14:06
want
14:06
to
14:06
separate
14:07
faith
14:07
from
14:08
religion.
14:09
So
14:09
I
14:09
grew
14:09
up,
14:10
you
14:10
know,
14:10
Christian,
14:11
and
14:11
we
14:11
went
14:11
to
14:11
church
14:11
on
14:12
Wednesday
14:12
night
14:12
and
14:13
Sunday
14:13
morning
14:13
and
14:13
Sunday
14:14
night
14:14
and
14:15
everyone
14:15
did
14:16
in
14:16
my
14:16
small
14:16
farm
14:17
town
14:17
community
14:17
in
14:18
Kansas.
14:19
And
14:19
for
14:19
a
14:20
lot
14:20
of
14:20
years,
14:20
once
14:21
I
14:21
realized
14:21
that
14:22
my
14:22
faith
14:22
was
14:22
important
14:23
to
14:23
me,
14:23
before
14:23
I
14:23
realized
14:24
I
14:24
was
14:24
gay,
14:24
I
14:25
was
14:25
baptized
14:25
before
14:26
I
14:26
realized
14:26
I
14:26
was
14:27
gay.
14:27
And
14:28
then
14:28
once
14:28
I
14:28
realized
14:29
I
14:29
was
14:29
gay,
14:30
it's
14:30
almost
14:31
as
14:31
if
14:31
those
14:31
messages
14:32
about
14:33
people
14:33
like
14:33
that,
14:34
the,
14:35
you
14:35
know,
14:35
the
14:35
homosexuals
14:36
and
14:36
what
14:36
was
14:37
being
14:37
talked
14:37
about
14:37
in
14:37
the
14:37
sermons,
14:38
it's
14:38
almost
14:39
like
14:39
every
14:39
sermon
14:40
was
14:40
about
14:40
that,
14:41
and
14:41
I'm
14:41
sure
14:41
it
14:41
was
14:41
because
14:42
I
14:42
noticed
14:42
it,
14:43
I
14:43
saw
14:44
it,
14:44
I
14:44
received
14:45
those
14:45
kind
14:46
of
14:46
teachings
14:47
in
14:47
a
14:47
really
14:48
big
14:48
outsized
14:49
way
14:49
because
14:49
I
14:50
was
14:50
so
14:50
scared
14:50
that
14:51
I
14:51
was
14:51
that
14:51
person,
14:51
which
14:52
I
14:52
was.
14:53
And
14:54
so
14:55
I
14:55
spent
14:56
a
14:56
good
14:56
deal
14:56
from
14:56
age
14:57
9
14:57
to,
14:58
you
14:58
know,
14:58
probably
14:59
18,
15:00
17,
15:01
thinking,
15:02
being
15:02
sure
15:02
that
15:02
I
15:02
was
15:03
going
15:03
to
15:03
hell.
15:03
So
15:04
every
15:04
day
15:04
of
15:05
my,
15:05
from
15:05
age
15:05
9
15:06
until
15:06
I
15:06
was
15:07
maybe
15:07
17
15:07
or
15:08
18,
15:08
I
15:09
said
15:09
a
15:09
prayer
15:10
every
15:10
single
15:11
day
15:11
of
15:11
my
15:11
life,
15:12
multiple
15:13
times
15:13
a
15:13
day.
15:13
Dear
15:14
God,
15:14
I
15:15
promise
15:15
to
15:15
be
15:15
a
15:15
good
15:16
person.
15:16
I
15:16
promise
15:17
to
15:17
not
15:17
lie,
15:18
cheat,
15:18
steal.
15:19
I
15:20
promise
15:20
to
15:20
be
15:20
a
15:21
good
15:21
person.
15:21
Please
15:21
just
15:22
take
15:22
it
15:22
away.
15:22
In
15:22
your
15:23
name
15:23
I
15:23
pray.
15:23
Amen.
15:24
And
15:25
when
15:25
I
15:25
think
15:25
back
15:26
to
15:26
the
15:26
9
15:26
year
15:27
old,
15:27
10
15:27
year
15:27
old,
15:28
11
15:28
year
15:28
old
15:28
me
15:31
spending
15:32
the
15:32
time
15:32
and
15:33
the
15:33
effort
15:33
to
15:34
give
15:35
time,
15:35
God
15:35
time
15:36
to
15:36
change
15:36
me
15:36
and
15:37
to
15:37
pray
15:37
that
15:37
prayer
15:38
out
15:38
loud.
15:39
And
15:40
I'd
15:40
go
15:40
out
15:40
to
15:40
the
15:40
middle
15:41
of
15:41
a
15:41
cornfield
15:41
and
15:42
say
15:42
it
15:42
out
15:42
loud
15:43
because
15:43
it
15:43
wasn't
15:43
working
15:44
in
15:44
my.
15:44
I'd
15:45
say
15:45
it
15:45
quietly
15:45
and
15:46
I
15:46
was
15:46
like,
15:46
well,
15:46
I'm
15:46
not
15:46
saying
15:47
it
15:47
often
15:47
enough.
15:48
Maybe
15:48
I
15:48
need
15:49
to
15:49
say
15:49
it
15:49
out
15:49
loud.
15:50
I
15:50
would
15:50
go
15:50
find
15:51
places
15:51
where
15:51
I
15:52
could
15:52
say
15:52
it.
15:53
And
15:54
for
15:54
you
15:54
Know,
15:54
I
15:54
have
15:54
a
15:55
12
15:55
year
15:55
old
15:55
boy,
15:55
there'll
15:56
be
15:56
12
15:56
soon.
15:57
And
15:57
when
15:57
I
15:57
think
15:57
about
15:59
what,
16:00
what
16:01
I
16:01
would
16:01
want
16:01
from
16:02
my
16:02
children
16:04
in
16:04
their
16:04
childhood,
16:05
what
16:06
a
16:06
wasted
16:07
effort
16:08
and
16:08
what
16:08
a,
16:08
what
16:09
a
16:09
place
16:09
of
16:09
fear
16:10
that
16:10
I
16:10
was
16:10
kind
16:11
of
16:11
navigating.
16:12
It
16:12
breaks
16:13
my
16:13
heart
16:13
for
16:14
kids
16:14
that
16:15
are
16:15
still
16:15
doing
16:15
that.
16:16
It
16:16
breaks
16:17
my
16:17
heart
16:17
for
16:17
the
16:18
little
16:18
me.
16:21
But
16:23
when
16:23
I
16:24
realized,
16:24
wait
16:25
a
16:25
minute,
16:26
God
16:27
made
16:27
me
16:27
exactly
16:27
as
16:27
I
16:28
am,
16:29
I
16:29
felt
16:29
like
16:29
it
16:29
was
16:30
so
16:30
weird,
16:30
this
16:30
kind
16:31
of
16:31
bifurcated
16:32
thing,
16:32
this
16:33
faith
16:33
and
16:34
then
16:34
the
16:34
religion
16:34
piece.
16:35
I
16:35
knew
16:36
in
16:36
my
16:36
heart
16:36
of
16:36
hearts
16:37
that
16:37
the
16:37
God
16:37
that
16:38
made
16:38
me,
16:38
that
16:38
gave
16:38
me
16:39
music,
16:40
that
16:40
allowed
16:41
me
16:41
to
16:41
sit
16:41
down
16:42
at
16:42
a
16:42
piano
16:42
and
16:42
hear
16:42
songs
16:43
and
16:43
just
16:43
be
16:43
able
16:43
to
16:44
play
16:44
them.
16:44
I
16:45
knew
16:45
that
16:45
came
16:45
from
16:46
somewhere.
16:46
And
16:47
so
16:47
I
16:47
couldn't.
16:48
It
16:48
became
16:49
more
16:49
and
16:49
more
16:49
difficult
16:50
to
16:50
reconcile
16:51
that
16:51
God
16:52
was
16:52
finding
16:52
me
16:52
in
16:53
favor
16:53
in
16:54
so
16:54
many
16:54
ways.
16:57
I
16:57
just
16:57
felt
16:58
like
16:58
God
16:59
shined
17:00
favor
17:01
on
17:01
me
17:02
and
17:02
then
17:02
that
17:03
didn't
17:03
make
17:03
sense
17:03
that
17:03
I
17:04
would
17:04
also
17:04
be
17:04
damned
17:05
to,
17:05
you
17:05
know,
17:06
eternal
17:06
damnation.
17:07
I
17:07
just,
17:08
at
17:08
some
17:08
point,
17:09
17
17:09
or
17:09
18,
17:10
I
17:10
was
17:11
like,
17:11
I'm
17:11
okay.
17:12
I'm
17:12
not
17:12
in
17:12
spiritual
17:13
jeopardy.
17:13
But
17:14
I
17:14
knew
17:14
I
17:15
was
17:15
in
17:16
social
17:16
jeopardy,
17:18
and
17:18
I
17:18
knew
17:18
I
17:18
was
17:18
in
17:19
country
17:19
music
17:19
jeopardy.
17:20
I
17:20
knew
17:20
no
17:20
one
17:21
had
17:21
ever
17:21
been.
17:22
Had
17:22
acknowledged
17:23
being
17:23
gay
17:23
in
17:23
country
17:24
music.
17:24
And
17:24
when
17:24
I
17:25
got
17:25
to
17:25
Nashville,
17:25
I
17:26
just
17:26
doubled
17:26
down
17:26
on
17:27
that
17:27
secret.
17:27
And
17:27
I'm
17:28
like,
17:28
well,
17:28
if
17:28
anyone's
17:29
ever
17:29
gonna
17:29
come
17:29
out,
17:30
it's
17:30
not
17:30
gonna
17:30
be
17:30
me.
17:31
And
17:31
it
17:31
would
17:32
be
17:33
20
17:34
some
17:34
years
17:35
later,
17:35
it
17:36
would
17:36
be
17:36
me.
17:37
Wow.
17:37
That
17:38
said,
17:38
how
17:39
powerful.
17:39
I
17:39
mean,
17:40
it
17:40
was
17:40
something
17:40
you
17:40
had
17:41
to
17:41
do.
17:42
You
17:42
had
17:42
to
17:42
do
17:43
it.
17:43
I
17:43
had
17:43
to.
17:43
Well,
17:44
I
17:44
was
17:44
not
17:44
going
17:44
to
17:45
survive
17:45
it
17:45
if
17:45
I
17:45
didn't.
17:46
And
17:46
I
17:46
also
17:46
knew
17:47
that
17:47
I'd
17:47
been
17:48
a
17:48
good
17:48
steward
17:48
of
17:49
my
17:49
life.
17:50
And
17:50
I
17:50
knew
17:50
that,
17:51
you
17:51
know,
17:52
the
17:53
things
17:53
that
17:53
people
17:54
said
17:54
about
17:54
gay
17:55
people,
17:55
especially
17:56
in
17:56
faith
17:56
communities,
17:57
well,
17:57
they're,
17:58
they're
17:58
sick
17:59
and
17:59
they're
17:59
broken
18:00
and
18:00
they're
18:00
addicts
18:01
and
18:01
they're
18:01
this
18:02
and
18:02
they're
18:02
that.
18:02
And
18:03
someone,
18:04
you
18:04
know,
18:04
traumatized
18:05
them
18:05
in
18:05
their
18:05
childhood.
18:07
And
18:08
none
18:08
of
18:08
that
18:09
was
18:09
true
18:09
for
18:09
me.
18:10
And
18:10
I
18:10
knew
18:10
that
18:10
that
18:11
was.
18:11
I
18:11
had
18:11
a
18:11
really
18:12
unique
18:14
capital
18:14
and
18:15
I
18:15
had
18:15
been
18:15
a
18:15
good
18:16
steward
18:16
of
18:16
my
18:16
life.
18:17
And
18:19
how
18:19
could
18:19
anyone
18:20
argue
18:20
with
18:22
the
18:22
life
18:22
I'd
18:22
lived
18:24
again?
18:24
I'm,
18:25
you
18:25
know,
18:25
I'm
18:26
just
18:27
a
18:27
farm
18:27
girl
18:27
from
18:28
Kansas
18:28
that
18:28
loves
18:29
the
18:29
Opry.
18:29
And
18:30
I
18:30
didn't
18:30
break
18:30
rules,
18:31
and
18:31
I
18:31
was
18:31
a
18:31
straight
18:32
A
18:32
student.
18:32
I
18:33
followed
18:33
all
18:33
the
18:33
rules.
18:34
And
18:34
I
18:34
don't
18:35
drink,
18:35
I
18:35
don't
18:35
smoke.
18:36
You
18:36
know,
18:36
I
18:37
never
18:37
did
18:37
drugs.
18:38
I
18:38
just.
18:39
How
18:39
could
18:40
anyone
18:40
Argue
18:41
with
18:41
what
18:41
I
18:41
had
18:42
to
18:42
offer
18:42
about
18:43
all
18:43
of
18:43
those
18:44
things
18:44
and
18:44
then
18:45
saying,
18:45
oh,
18:46
one
18:46
more
18:46
thing,
18:46
one
18:46
more
18:47
card
18:47
I
18:47
want
18:47
to
18:47
lay
18:47
on
18:48
the
18:48
table
18:48
for
18:48
you
18:48
to
18:48
ponder.
18:49
Do
18:49
with
18:50
it
18:50
what
18:50
you
18:50
will,
18:51
but
18:51
I'm
18:51
a
18:51
gay
18:51
person.
18:55
Wow.
18:57
Yeah,
18:57
it's
18:57
amazing.
18:58
You
18:58
know,
18:58
I
18:58
think
18:59
in
18:59
midlife
18:59
too.
19:00
And
19:00
tell
19:00
me
19:00
if
19:01
you've
19:01
been,
19:01
you
19:01
know,
19:02
kind
19:02
of
19:02
noticing
19:02
this,
19:03
but
19:03
I
19:03
think
19:03
a
19:03
lot
19:04
of
19:04
women
19:04
are
19:04
really,
19:05
you
19:05
know,
19:05
finding
19:06
out
19:06
who
19:06
they
19:06
are
19:07
and
19:07
really
19:08
speaking
19:08
their
19:08
truths
19:09
as
19:09
well.
19:10
And
19:10
there
19:10
is
19:10
a
19:11
kind
19:11
of
19:11
a
19:11
buzzy
19:11
phrase
19:12
that's
19:12
called
19:13
late
19:13
in
19:13
life
19:13
lesbian.
19:14
And
19:15
so
19:15
it's
19:15
been
19:15
kind
19:16
of
19:16
going
19:16
around,
19:16
right.
19:17
Perhaps
19:18
maybe
19:18
a
19:18
woman
19:19
was
19:19
married
19:19
to
19:19
a
19:19
man
19:20
or
19:20
she
19:20
had
19:20
dated
19:20
men
19:21
before.
19:21
Whatever
19:22
the
19:22
story
19:22
is,
19:23
I
19:23
just
19:23
want
19:23
to
19:23
know
19:23
what
19:24
you
19:24
think
19:24
about
19:24
that.
19:25
And
19:25
is
19:25
that
19:25
something
19:25
that
19:25
you're
19:26
seeing
19:26
as
19:26
well?
19:27
And
19:27
just
19:27
what,
19:28
what
19:28
are
19:28
your
19:28
thoughts
19:28
on
19:29
that?
19:29
Yeah.
19:30
So
19:30
shortly
19:30
after
19:30
I
19:31
came
19:31
out,
19:31
I
19:31
recall
19:32
I
19:32
had
19:33
the
19:33
TV
19:33
on
19:33
and
19:33
there
19:34
was
19:34
a
19:34
guy
19:34
named
19:34
Dr.
19:35
Drew,
19:37
forgotten
19:37
his
19:37
last
19:38
name,
19:38
but
19:38
he
19:38
had
19:38
a
19:39
network
19:40
like
19:40
talk
19:41
show.
19:42
And
19:42
he
19:42
was
19:43
talking
19:43
about
19:44
late
19:44
in
19:44
life
19:45
lesbians.
19:45
And
19:46
he
19:46
was
19:46
making
19:46
this
19:47
kind
19:47
of
19:48
dramatic
19:49
causation
19:50
like
19:51
correlation
19:52
between
19:53
menopause
19:54
and.
19:54
It
19:54
must
19:55
be
19:55
something
19:55
that
19:55
happens
19:56
during
19:56
menopause.
19:58
I
19:58
just,
19:59
I,
20:00
it
20:00
was
20:01
so
20:01
crazy
20:01
to
20:01
me.
20:03
It's
20:03
not
20:04
that
20:04
menopause,
20:05
that's
20:05
not
20:06
it.
20:06
It's
20:07
that
20:08
at
20:08
that
20:09
time
20:09
and
20:09
again,
20:10
Meredith
20:11
Baxter,
20:11
Bernie
20:12
had
20:12
just
20:12
come
20:12
out,
20:12
she
20:12
and
20:13
I
20:13
came
20:13
out
20:13
around
20:14
the
20:14
same
20:14
time.
20:15
And
20:18
I
20:19
have
20:19
met
20:20
thousands
20:21
of
20:21
late
20:22
in
20:22
life
20:22
lesbians,
20:23
late
20:23
in
20:24
life
20:24
gay
20:24
men.
20:25
It's
20:25
not
20:25
that
20:26
that
20:26
they
20:26
turned
20:27
gay
20:28
late
20:28
in
20:29
life,
20:29
it's
20:29
that
20:29
they
20:30
decided,
20:30
I
20:31
feel
20:31
safer.
20:32
I've
20:32
put
20:32
him
20:33
putting
20:33
a
20:33
premium
20:33
on
20:34
my
20:34
happiness.
20:35
And
20:35
I
20:36
almost
20:36
became,
20:36
I
20:37
almost
20:37
married
20:38
men.
20:38
Right.
20:39
It
20:39
would
20:39
have
20:39
been,
20:39
I,
20:40
it
20:40
could
20:40
have
20:40
easily
20:41
happened.
20:41
And
20:42
the
20:42
reasons
20:42
that
20:43
people
20:43
get
20:44
women
20:44
and
20:44
men
20:45
make
20:45
decisions
20:46
to
20:46
even
20:46
if
20:46
they're
20:46
gay
20:47
to
20:47
marry
20:48
a
20:48
man
20:48
or
20:49
marry,
20:49
marry
20:50
someone
20:50
of
20:50
the
20:50
opposite
20:51
sex
20:51
is
20:51
because
20:52
you
20:52
don't
20:52
think
20:52
you're
20:53
ever
20:53
going
20:53
to
20:53
get
20:53
to
20:53
be,
20:54
to
20:54
be
20:55
that
20:55
authentic
20:55
person.
20:56
So
20:56
what
20:56
do
20:56
you,
20:56
do
20:57
you
20:57
say,
20:57
you
20:57
know,
20:57
what
20:58
if
20:58
I'm
20:59
going
20:59
to
20:59
have
20:59
to
20:59
live
20:59
this
21:00
traditional
21:00
life
21:00
with
21:01
which
21:01
society
21:02
expects
21:02
me
21:03
to,
21:03
I'm
21:04
going
21:04
to
21:04
pick
21:04
a
21:04
partner
21:05
that
21:05
I
21:05
can,
21:05
that
21:06
I
21:06
like,
21:06
that
21:07
my
21:07
values
21:07
are
21:07
aligned.
21:08
And
21:09
sometimes
21:10
their
21:10
partner
21:11
knows
21:11
that
21:11
they're
21:11
gay.
21:12
Sometimes
21:12
it's
21:12
a
21:12
gay
21:13
man
21:13
marrying
21:13
a
21:13
gay
21:14
woman
21:14
and
21:14
they
21:14
say,
21:15
let's
21:15
partner
21:15
up
21:16
and
21:16
let's
21:16
live
21:16
a
21:16
life
21:17
together,
21:17
a
21:18
lot
21:18
of
21:18
that.
21:19
And
21:19
then
21:19
sometimes
21:20
it's
21:20
a
21:20
woman
21:21
marrying
21:21
a
21:21
Man,
21:21
that
21:22
she's
21:22
like,
21:23
well,
21:23
I
21:23
want
21:23
to
21:23
have
21:24
a
21:24
family.
21:24
And
21:24
I
21:24
don't
21:24
think
21:25
I
21:25
can
21:25
have
21:25
a
21:25
family
21:25
as
21:26
a
21:26
gay
21:26
person.
21:26
And
21:26
I
21:27
really
21:27
love
21:27
this
21:27
man,
21:27
and
21:28
I
21:28
love
21:29
him
21:29
as
21:29
much
21:29
as
21:29
I
21:30
can.
21:30
I'm
21:30
not
21:30
really
21:31
wired
21:31
to
21:31
love
21:31
him,
21:32
you
21:32
know,
21:32
in
21:33
an
21:33
intimate
21:34
way.
21:34
But
21:34
do
21:35
my
21:35
values
21:35
align
21:37
and
21:37
do
21:37
I
21:38
want
21:38
to
21:38
build
21:38
a
21:38
family?
21:38
And
21:39
he's
21:39
a
21:39
good
21:39
person.
21:41
Let's
21:41
do
21:41
that.
21:42
So
21:42
it's
21:42
not
21:43
that
21:44
people
21:44
turn
21:45
gay
21:45
late
21:45
in
21:46
their
21:46
lives.
21:46
It's
21:47
that
21:47
the
21:48
aperture
21:50
of
21:51
what
21:51
life
21:51
can
21:52
be
21:52
and
21:52
that
21:52
there
21:53
are
21:53
more
21:53
gay
21:53
people
21:54
who
21:54
have
21:54
raised
21:54
their
21:54
hand
21:55
and
21:55
said,
21:55
hey,
21:55
I'm
21:55
gay.
21:56
It's
21:57
that
21:57
if
21:57
you
21:58
see
21:58
it
21:58
and
21:58
there's
21:59
representation
22:00
in
22:00
the
22:00
world,
22:00
you
22:00
begin
22:01
to
22:01
think
22:02
maybe
22:02
I
22:02
too
22:03
could
22:03
have
22:03
that.
22:04
So
22:04
the
22:05
late
22:05
in
22:05
life
22:05
lesbian.
22:06
And
22:06
again,
22:07
there's
22:07
no
22:07
rule
22:07
that
22:08
holds
22:08
for
22:08
everyone.
22:09
It's
22:09
not
22:09
a
22:10
monolith.
22:11
But
22:11
there's
22:12
absolutely.
22:13
I
22:13
think
22:14
99%
22:15
of
22:15
the
22:15
people
22:15
who
22:15
become
22:16
late
22:16
in
22:16
life
22:16
lesbians
22:17
always,
22:18
they
22:18
probably
22:19
fell
22:19
in
22:19
love
22:19
with
22:19
their
22:19
best
22:20
friend
22:20
when,
22:20
when
22:20
they
22:20
were
22:21
20
22:21
or
22:22
the
22:22
mom
22:22
of
22:23
their
22:23
kid's
22:24
best
22:24
friend
22:24
and
22:25
probably
22:25
were
22:26
like,
22:26
am
22:26
I
22:26
gay
22:27
or
22:27
what's
22:28
going
22:28
on
22:28
here?
22:30
Late
22:30
in
22:30
life
22:31
lesbian
22:31
to
22:31
me
22:32
just
22:32
means
22:33
they
22:33
just
22:34
got
22:34
tired
22:34
of
22:35
living
22:35
their
22:36
life
22:36
with
22:36
the
22:37
expectations
22:38
and
22:38
social
22:39
norms
22:39
that
22:39
have
22:39
been
22:40
put
22:40
on
22:40
all
22:40
of
22:40
us.
22:41
And
22:41
at
22:41
some
22:41
point,
22:42
it's
22:42
like
22:42
late
22:42
in
22:42
life
22:43
women
22:43
who
22:44
decide,
22:44
I'm
22:44
going
22:44
to
22:45
divorce
22:45
this
22:45
guy
22:45
after
22:46
30
22:46
years
22:46
because
22:46
he's
22:47
an
22:47
asshole.
22:49
It's
22:49
the
22:49
same
22:49
bucket
22:50
of
22:50
people
22:50
saying,
22:51
no
22:51
more.
22:51
I'm
22:52
going
22:52
to
22:52
live
22:52
for
22:52
me
22:52
now.
22:53
And
22:53
some
22:54
of
22:54
them
22:54
are
22:54
late
22:54
in
22:54
life
22:55
get
22:55
divorced
22:55
women
22:56
because
22:57
they're
22:57
sick
22:58
of
22:59
the
22:59
husband
22:59
and
23:00
she's
23:00
been
23:00
doing
23:01
all
23:01
the
23:01
work
23:01
for
23:01
30
23:02
years
23:02
or
23:03
she's
23:03
not
23:03
loved
23:04
him
23:04
for
23:04
20
23:04
years.
23:06
And
23:06
that's
23:07
the
23:07
same
23:07
bucket
23:07
of
23:07
people
23:08
of
23:08
women
23:09
that
23:09
say,
23:10
I'm
23:10
just
23:10
going
23:10
to
23:11
live
23:11
my
23:11
life.
23:11
And
23:11
I
23:11
happen
23:12
to.
23:12
I
23:12
know
23:12
I
23:12
love
23:13
women
23:13
and
23:13
I'm
23:13
going
23:13
to
23:13
date
23:14
women
23:14
or
23:14
I'm
23:15
gonna.
23:15
Yeah,
23:15
that
23:16
makes
23:16
complete
23:16
sense.
23:17
Yeah.
23:17
Yeah.
23:18
Are
23:18
you
23:18
a
23:19
straight
23:19
person?
23:20
So
23:20
I
23:20
am
23:20
a
23:20
straight
23:21
person.
23:21
Married,
23:22
you
23:22
know,
23:22
20
23:23
years
23:23
actually
23:23
this
23:24
past
23:24
week.
23:24
My
23:25
husband.
23:25
Congratulations.
23:26
Thank
23:27
you.
23:27
Thank
23:27
you.
23:28
You
23:28
know,
23:28
it's
23:28
always
23:28
a
23:28
roller
23:29
coaster,
23:29
though.
23:29
It's
23:30
like
23:30
very,
23:30
you
23:30
know,
23:31
up
23:31
and
23:31
down.
23:32
Marriage
23:32
is
23:33
like
23:34
a.
23:34
Is.
23:34
I
23:35
talk
23:35
about
23:35
faith.
23:36
It's
23:36
a
23:36
faith
23:36
practice.
23:37
Marriage
23:37
is
23:38
a
23:38
practice
23:38
as
23:39
well.
23:39
And
23:39
it's
23:40
good
23:40
work.
23:40
And
23:41
if
23:41
you're,
23:41
if
23:41
you're
23:41
with,
23:42
you
23:42
know,
23:42
if
23:42
you're
23:42
doing
23:42
the
23:42
work
23:43
with
23:43
the
23:43
person
23:43
you
23:43
want
23:43
to,
23:44
it's
23:45
really
23:45
gratifying.
23:45
Congratulations
23:46
to
23:46
you.
23:46
Thank
23:47
you.
23:47
Thank
23:47
you
23:47
so
23:47
much.
23:47
And
23:48
you
23:48
too,
23:48
because
23:48
you've
23:49
been
23:49
with
23:49
your
23:49
wife
23:49
for.
23:50
Is
23:50
it
23:50
15,
23:51
15.
23:51
No,
23:52
14
23:52
years
23:52
now.
23:54
It's
23:54
crazy.
23:55
How
23:55
do
23:55
you
23:55
guys
23:55
navigate
23:56
this
23:56
crazy
23:57
thing
23:57
called
23:57
marriage,
23:57
you
23:58
know?
23:58
Yeah,
23:59
it
23:59
is
23:59
a.
24:00
Again,
24:01
my
24:01
North
24:02
Star
24:02
is.
24:02
Is
24:02
this
24:03
the
24:03
person
24:03
I
24:03
want
24:03
to
24:04
be
24:04
doing
24:04
the
24:04
work
24:04
with?
24:05
Right.
24:05
And.
24:05
Right.
24:06
And
24:06
my
24:06
answer
24:07
is
24:07
this
24:08
is,
24:08
this
24:08
is
24:09
good
24:09
work
24:09
with.
24:10
I
24:10
love
24:10
Lauren
24:11
and
24:11
she's
24:11
so
24:12
funny
24:12
and
24:12
she's.
24:12
And
24:13
we've.
24:13
We
24:13
had
24:13
preemie
24:14
twins
24:14
and
24:15
we've
24:15
gone
24:16
through
24:16
a
24:16
lot
24:16
together
24:17
and
24:17
at
24:18
the
24:18
end
24:18
of
24:18
the
24:18
day,
24:19
she's
24:20
the
24:20
one
24:20
I
24:20
want
24:20
to
24:20
call.
24:21
She's
24:21
my
24:21
first
24:21
call,
24:22
my
24:23
last
24:23
call
24:23
of
24:23
the
24:24
day.
24:24
And
24:25
that's
24:25
good
24:25
stuff.
24:26
And,
24:26
and,
24:26
and
24:27
you
24:27
know,
24:27
when
24:27
you
24:27
study
24:28
the
24:28
arc
24:28
of
24:28
marriage,
24:29
my
24:29
grandparents
24:29
were
24:30
married
24:30
50
24:30
plus
24:31
years
24:31
and
24:32
lots
24:32
of
24:32
long
24:32
marriages
24:33
in
24:33
my,
24:34
in
24:34
our
24:34
kind
24:34
of
24:35
ecosystem
24:35
of
24:36
humans.
24:37
And
24:37
when
24:38
you
24:38
really
24:38
dig
24:38
in
24:39
and
24:39
talk
24:39
to
24:39
people
24:39
who've
24:40
been
24:40
married
24:40
60,
24:41
50
24:41
years,
24:42
there's
24:42
not
24:43
a
24:43
single
24:43
one
24:43
of
24:43
them
24:44
that
24:44
haven't
24:45
said,
24:45
oh,
24:45
it
24:45
was
24:45
rocky,
24:46
it
24:47
was
24:47
hard
24:48
and
24:49
I
24:49
just,
24:50
I
24:50
like
24:50
doing
24:51
the
24:51
work.
24:52
It
24:52
is,
24:52
you're.
24:53
You're
24:53
absolutely
24:53
right.
24:53
There
24:54
is
24:54
work.
24:54
And
24:55
I
24:55
heard
24:55
this
24:56
piece
24:56
of
24:56
marriage
24:56
advice.
24:57
It
24:57
said,
24:58
just
24:59
don't
24:59
want
24:59
to
24:59
get
24:59
divorced
25:00
at
25:00
the
25:00
same
25:00
time.
25:02
Oh
25:02
my
25:02
God,
25:03
it's
25:03
been
25:03
times.
25:04
Right,
25:05
right,
25:06
right.
25:06
Someone
25:08
at
25:08
every
25:08
juncture,
25:09
we
25:10
need
25:10
at
25:10
least
25:10
one
25:10
of
25:11
the
25:11
people
25:11
saying,
25:11
we're
25:12
in
25:12
this
25:12
baby.
25:13
Let's,
25:14
you
25:14
know,
25:15
quitting.
25:15
I'm
25:15
not
25:15
much
25:15
of
25:16
a
25:16
quitter.
25:17
It's
25:18
one
25:18
of
25:18
those
25:18
things
25:18
too.
25:19
Like
25:19
you're
25:19
saying
25:19
if
25:19
you
25:20
find
25:20
that
25:20
right
25:20
person,
25:21
you
25:21
can
25:21
weather
25:22
the
25:22
storms,
25:22
you
25:23
know,
25:23
and
25:23
it's
25:23
just,
25:24
it
25:24
is
25:25
putting
25:25
in
25:25
the
25:25
work.
25:26
But
25:26
when
25:26
you
25:27
guys
25:27
feel
25:27
a
25:27
little
25:27
bit
25:28
off
25:28
kilter
25:28
or
25:29
there's
25:29
like
25:29
issues
25:29
going,
25:30
what
25:30
brings
25:30
you
25:31
back
25:31
to
25:31
each
25:31
other?
25:32
Laughter
25:33
okay.
25:35
What
25:35
we
25:36
believe
25:36
to
25:37
be,
25:39
you
25:39
know,
25:39
our
25:40
family
25:40
with
25:40
our
25:41
identical
25:42
twin
25:42
boys,
25:42
George
25:43
and
25:43
Everett.
25:45
When
25:45
I
25:45
think
25:45
about
25:46
the
25:46
90
25:46
year
25:46
old
25:47
me.
25:47
Lauren's
25:48
in
25:48
that.
25:49
Lauren's
25:49
still
25:50
in
25:50
my,
25:50
that
25:51
circle
25:51
and
25:53
in
25:53
the
25:54
past,
25:54
you
25:55
know,
25:55
five,
25:55
six,
25:56
definitely
25:57
Covid.
25:58
Inspired
25:59
some
25:59
thinking
25:59
for
25:59
me
26:00
and
26:00
that
26:01
my
26:01
goal
26:01
is
26:02
to
26:02
just
26:03
think
26:03
about
26:03
the
26:04
outcome
26:04
and
26:04
the
26:05
my
26:05
last
26:05
day.
26:06
It
26:07
may
26:07
sound
26:07
macabre
26:08
and
26:08
maybe
26:08
it's
26:08
the
26:09
songwriter
26:09
in
26:09
me,
26:10
but
26:10
I
26:10
think
26:11
about
26:11
what
26:11
I
26:12
want
26:12
my
26:12
last
26:13
day
26:13
to
26:13
look
26:14
like
26:14
and
26:14
then
26:15
I
26:15
just
26:15
reverse
26:16
engineer
26:16
into
26:16
that.
26:17
Oh,
26:18
I
26:18
have
26:19
about
26:19
10,000
26:20
sunrises
26:21
left.
26:22
Wait,
26:22
is
26:23
this,
26:23
has
26:23
this
26:23
been
26:23
calculated?
26:24
Is
26:24
it
26:24
really
26:24
10,000?
26:25
That's
26:25
my
26:26
math
26:26
Right.
26:26
If
26:26
I'm,
26:27
you
26:27
know,
26:27
live
26:27
to
26:27
be
26:28
late
26:28
80s
26:28
or
26:29
whatever,
26:29
I'm
26:30
54.
26:30
So
26:30
I've
26:31
got,
26:31
give
26:31
or
26:32
take,
26:32
10,000
26:33
sunrises
26:34
left.
26:34
And
26:35
at
26:35
the
26:35
end
26:36
of
26:36
the
26:36
whole
26:37
whatever
26:37
this
26:38
is,
26:39
there
26:40
is
26:40
only
26:40
one
26:40
question
26:41
to
26:41
be
26:41
answered.
26:42
And
26:42
the
26:43
question
26:43
to
26:43
be
26:43
answered
26:44
will
26:44
be
26:44
whether
26:44
it's
26:45
me
26:45
kind
26:45
of
26:46
out
26:46
of
26:46
body,
26:46
looking
26:47
at
26:47
myself
26:47
or
26:47
my
26:48
creator.
26:48
There
26:49
will
26:49
be
26:49
one
26:49
answer,
26:50
one
26:50
question.
26:51
And
26:51
the
26:51
question
26:52
is,
26:52
what
26:53
did
26:53
you
26:53
do?
26:56
What
26:56
did
26:56
you
26:56
do?
26:57
And
26:59
everything
26:59
I
26:59
do
27:00
here
27:01
and
27:01
in
27:02
my
27:02
life,
27:02
I'm
27:02
reverse
27:03
engineering
27:04
into
27:04
what
27:04
I
27:04
want
27:05
that
27:06
moment
27:06
to
27:06
look
27:06
like.
27:06
And
27:07
maybe
27:07
I'm
27:07
really
27:07
think
27:07
a
27:08
lot
27:08
about
27:08
this
27:09
lately
27:09
because
27:09
my
27:10
dad
27:10
died
27:10
a
27:10
little
27:10
over
27:11
a
27:11
year
27:11
ago
27:12
and
27:12
we
27:12
were
27:13
all
27:13
there.
27:15
And
27:19
the
27:19
pilgrimage
27:19
that
27:20
people
27:20
made
27:21
in
27:21
my
27:21
dad's
27:22
final
27:23
few
27:23
days
27:23
at
27:23
the
27:23
VA
27:24
hospital
27:24
there
27:24
in
27:25
Kansas
27:25
City,
27:26
it
27:26
was
27:26
just
27:26
a
27:27
steady
27:27
stream
27:28
of
27:28
just
27:28
people
27:29
coming
27:30
to
27:30
tell
27:31
him
27:32
what
27:32
he
27:32
did
27:32
for
27:32
them,
27:33
what
27:33
he
27:33
meant
27:33
for
27:33
them.
27:34
And
27:34
I
27:34
knew,
27:34
I
27:34
knew
27:35
my
27:35
dad
27:35
very
27:35
well
27:36
and
27:36
I
27:36
knew
27:37
he
27:37
had
27:37
had
27:37
a
27:37
big
27:37
impact
27:38
on
27:38
a
27:38
lot
27:38
of
27:39
people.
27:40
But
27:40
the
27:41
people
27:41
I
27:41
didn't
27:42
know,
27:42
that
27:42
he
27:42
made
27:43
a
27:43
huge,
27:43
pivotal,
27:44
transformative
27:45
difference
27:46
in
27:46
their
27:46
lives
27:47
by
27:47
showing
27:47
up,
27:48
by
27:48
being
27:48
there
27:49
sometimes,
27:50
you
27:50
know,
27:50
give
27:50
him,
27:51
giving
27:51
them
27:51
one
27:52
of
27:52
his
27:52
cars
27:52
or
27:53
a
27:53
truck
27:53
or
27:54
moving
27:54
them,
27:55
taking
27:55
his
27:55
truck
27:56
and
27:56
saying,
27:56
let's,
27:57
let's
27:57
get
27:57
you
27:57
moved.
27:58
Or
27:58
money
27:58
or
27:59
his
27:59
resources,
27:59
his
28:00
time.
28:00
He
28:00
didn't
28:00
have
28:01
a
28:01
lot
28:01
of
28:01
money,
28:01
but
28:01
he
28:02
gave.
28:02
Literally,
28:03
you
28:03
hear
28:03
about
28:03
a
28:04
person
28:04
who
28:04
would
28:04
give
28:04
the
28:04
shirt
28:05
on
28:05
off
28:05
their
28:06
back.
28:06
I
28:06
literally
28:07
met
28:07
a
28:07
guy
28:08
that
28:08
said,
28:08
your
28:09
dad
28:09
gave
28:09
me
28:10
his
28:10
shirt.
28:11
Like,
28:11
literally,
28:12
literally.
28:13
They
28:13
were
28:13
going
28:13
to
28:14
like
28:14
some
28:14
job
28:14
interview.
28:15
And
28:16
my
28:16
dad
28:16
was
28:16
like,
28:16
you
28:16
can't
28:16
wear
28:17
that.
28:17
Took
28:17
off
28:18
his
28:18
button
28:18
down,
28:19
his
28:19
pearl
28:19
snap
28:20
cowboy
28:21
button
28:21
down,
28:21
and
28:22
gave
28:23
them
28:23
his
28:23
shirt.
28:24
And
28:25
he
28:25
said,
28:25
and
28:25
I
28:25
got
28:26
the
28:26
job.
28:26
And
28:26
I
28:27
felt
28:27
really
28:27
good
28:28
going
28:28
in.
28:29
I
28:29
felt
28:29
like
28:29
I
28:29
was.
28:29
I
28:30
showed
28:30
up,
28:30
right?
28:31
And
28:32
I
28:32
had
28:32
your
28:32
dad's
28:32
shirt
28:33
on,
28:33
like,
28:36
so
28:37
what
28:37
does
28:37
my
28:38
last
28:38
day
28:38
look
28:38
like?
28:41
And
28:41
what
28:41
is
28:41
that
28:42
question?
28:42
And
28:42
what
28:42
is
28:43
that
28:43
answer
28:43
to
28:43
that
28:43
question?
28:44
What
28:44
did
28:44
you
28:44
do?
28:47
I'm
28:47
doing.
28:47
I'm
28:47
doing
28:48
it.
28:49
That's
28:49
amazing.
28:49
That's
28:50
absolutely
28:50
amazing.
28:50
And
28:51
what
28:51
do
28:51
you
28:51
believe
28:51
to
28:52
be
28:52
after
28:53
this,
28:53
after
28:54
this
28:54
life?
28:55
What
28:55
does
28:56
it
28:56
look
28:56
like
28:56
on
28:57
the
28:57
other
28:57
side?
28:58
Great
28:58
question.
29:00
I
29:00
think
29:00
it
29:00
doesn't
29:00
look
29:01
anything
29:01
like
29:02
what
29:02
we
29:02
think
29:02
it
29:02
looks
29:02
like.
29:03
Okay?
29:03
I
29:03
do
29:04
not
29:04
believe
29:04
in
29:04
hell.
29:05
Okay.
29:08
I
29:09
do
29:09
not.
29:10
I
29:10
believe
29:10
there's
29:11
something,
29:11
things
29:12
somewhere.
29:13
I'm
29:14
not
29:14
convinced
29:15
that
29:15
it's
29:15
not
29:16
coming
29:17
back
29:17
as
29:17
an
29:17
animal.
29:18
And
29:18
again,
29:19
I
29:20
get
29:20
asked
29:21
to
29:21
leave
29:23
the
29:23
Christian
29:23
table
29:24
a
29:24
lot,
29:24
especially
29:25
by
29:25
evangelicals,
29:26
because
29:26
what
29:27
I'm
29:27
saying,
29:27
coming
29:27
back
29:28
as
29:28
a
29:28
bird
29:28
or
29:28
a
29:28
dog
29:29
or
29:29
another
29:29
person
29:30
is
29:30
not
29:30
aligned
29:31
with
29:32
the
29:32
Christian
29:32
faith.
29:33
But
29:33
I
29:33
believe
29:34
that
29:34
faiths
29:35
around
29:35
the
29:35
world
29:37
that.
29:38
Look,
29:38
I've
29:38
been
29:38
around
29:39
the
29:39
world
29:39
and
29:39
I've
29:39
seen
29:39
faiths,
29:40
different
29:40
based
29:40
practice,
29:41
very
29:41
beautifully
29:42
and
29:43
for
29:43
much
29:43
longer
29:44
than
29:44
Christianity.
29:45
And
29:45
I
29:45
think
29:45
there
29:46
is
29:46
something.
29:46
I
29:47
don't
29:47
think
29:47
my
29:47
energy
29:48
and
29:49
my
29:49
spirit
29:49
will
29:50
go
29:50
nowhere.
29:51
I
29:51
think
29:51
there's
29:52
something,
29:52
but
29:52
I
29:52
don't,
29:54
I
29:54
don't
29:54
think
29:55
there
29:55
aren't
29:55
gold,
29:56
golden
29:56
sidewalks,
29:57
if
29:57
you
29:57
ask
29:57
me.
29:57
There
29:58
is
29:58
not
29:58
a
29:58
heaven.
29:59
It's
29:59
not
29:59
up.
30:00
I
30:00
don't,
30:00
I.
30:01
I
30:01
think
30:01
it
30:01
may
30:02
be
30:02
just
30:02
a
30:03
continuum
30:05
of
30:06
spirit
30:06
and
30:07
energy.
30:08
And
30:08
I
30:08
don't
30:08
spend
30:09
a
30:09
lot
30:09
of
30:09
time
30:09
thinking
30:10
about
30:10
salvation
30:11
and
30:12
the
30:12
afterlife.
30:13
One
30:13
of
30:13
my
30:13
spiritual
30:14
advisors
30:15
said,
30:15
shelley,
30:16
you're
30:16
the
30:16
kind
30:16
of
30:16
person
30:18
that
30:19
your
30:19
faith
30:20
is.
30:22
He
30:23
gave
30:23
me
30:23
a
30:23
notion
30:24
that
30:24
I
30:24
really
30:24
believe
30:24
in.
30:25
I
30:25
think
30:25
faith
30:25
doesn't.
30:26
It's
30:27
not
30:27
about,
30:27
oh,
30:27
I
30:27
hope
30:28
I
30:28
don't
30:28
screw
30:29
up
30:29
so
30:29
badly
30:30
here
30:30
that
30:30
I
30:30
get
30:30
to
30:30
go
30:30
to
30:30
heaven.
30:31
It's
30:31
not
30:31
that
30:32
my
30:32
faith
30:33
makes
30:33
me
30:33
better
30:33
today
30:34
on,
30:35
what
30:35
is
30:35
it,
30:35
Friday.
30:37
My
30:37
faith
30:37
makes
30:38
me
30:38
better
30:38
today.
30:39
My
30:39
faith
30:40
will
30:40
make
30:40
me
30:41
have
30:41
a
30:41
better
30:42
tomorrow,
30:42
Saturday
30:43
and
30:44
a
30:44
better
30:44
Sunday.
30:45
And
30:45
so
30:47
I
30:47
don't
30:48
look
30:48
at
30:48
it
30:49
like
30:49
a
30:49
prize
30:50
that
30:50
we
30:50
win.
30:52
It's
30:52
right
30:53
now
30:53
the
30:54
prize.
30:54
We're
30:54
living
30:55
it.
30:55
We're
30:55
living
30:55
it.
30:56
And
30:56
that's
30:56
the
30:56
problem.
30:57
People
30:57
don't.
30:57
Are
30:58
not
30:58
in
30:58
the
30:58
present.
30:58
You
30:59
know,
30:59
it's.
31:00
And
31:01
rightfully
31:01
so.
31:02
I
31:02
mean,
31:02
I
31:02
understand
31:02
why,
31:03
you
31:03
know,
31:03
people
31:04
through
31:04
trauma
31:05
or
31:05
whatever
31:05
the
31:05
circumstances
31:06
are,
31:06
live
31:07
in
31:07
the
31:07
past
31:07
sometimes
31:08
or,
31:08
you
31:08
know,
31:09
there's
31:09
anxiety,
31:09
they're
31:10
thinking
31:10
about
31:10
the
31:10
future.
31:11
But
31:11
it's
31:12
such
31:12
a
31:12
golden
31:12
moment
31:13
that
31:13
we're
31:13
living
31:14
right
31:14
now.
31:15
Right,
31:15
Right
31:16
now.
31:16
Right
31:16
now.
31:17
And
31:17
the
31:17
days
31:17
where
31:18
I
31:18
struggle
31:18
with
31:18
faith,
31:19
you
31:19
know,
31:20
when
31:20
someone
31:20
takes
31:20
a
31:20
gun
31:21
and
31:21
goes
31:21
into
31:21
a
31:21
kindergarten
31:22
and
31:23
murders,
31:24
you
31:24
know,
31:25
30
31:25
kindergartners,
31:26
I
31:26
struggle
31:27
with
31:28
my
31:28
faith
31:28
in
31:28
those
31:29
moments.
31:30
Those
31:30
are
31:30
the
31:30
moments
31:30
that
31:31
I
31:31
think
31:31
none
31:32
of
31:32
it's
31:32
real.
31:32
There's
31:33
just
31:33
no
31:33
way
31:34
a
31:35
maker
31:35
of
31:36
us,
31:36
a
31:36
creator
31:37
of
31:37
us,
31:37
would
31:38
allow
31:38
that
31:38
kind
31:39
of
31:40
trauma
31:40
and
31:41
violence
31:41
and
31:42
pain.
31:43
When
31:43
I
31:43
think
31:43
about
31:44
these
31:44
people
31:45
who
31:45
have
31:45
lost
31:45
their
31:46
children,
31:49
I
31:49
struggle
31:49
with
31:49
faith
31:50
in
31:50
those
31:50
moments.
31:50
But
31:51
that's
31:51
why
31:51
it's
31:51
called
31:51
a
31:51
faith
31:52
practice.
31:53
Got
31:53
to
31:53
get.
31:53
For
31:54
me,
31:55
for
31:55
me,
31:55
it
31:55
just
31:55
makes
31:56
me.
31:57
It
31:57
gives
31:57
me
31:57
comfort.
31:58
And
31:58
it
31:58
may
31:58
be
31:59
all
31:59
just
31:59
a
31:59
pipe
31:59
dream.
32:00
I
32:00
don't
32:00
know.
32:01
I
32:01
don't
32:01
care.
32:01
I
32:01
don't
32:01
care
32:02
what
32:02
other
32:02
people
32:02
think.
32:02
I
32:02
know
32:03
that
32:03
today
32:04
I'm
32:04
living
32:05
in
32:05
the
32:05
moment
32:05
and
32:05
my
32:05
faith
32:06
makes
32:06
me
32:06
able
32:07
to
32:08
find
32:09
joy,
32:09
allow
32:09
joy
32:10
and
32:10
grief
32:10
and
32:11
anxieties
32:12
and
32:13
regrets
32:14
and
32:14
all
32:14
of
32:14
that.
32:14
It
32:15
just
32:15
somehow
32:16
is
32:17
kind
32:17
of
32:17
the
32:17
thing
32:17
that
32:18
pulls
32:18
it
32:18
all
32:18
together
32:19
and
32:19
makes
32:19
it
32:19
make
32:19
sense.
32:20
And
32:21
that's
32:21
one
32:21
of
32:21
the
32:21
beauties
32:22
too
32:22
of
32:22
maturing
32:23
and
32:23
getting
32:23
older
32:24
is
32:25
you
32:25
don't
32:26
care
32:26
like
32:26
what
32:27
people
32:27
think
32:27
as
32:27
much
32:28
it's
32:28
not.
32:28
So
32:29
it
32:29
doesn't
32:29
stop
32:30
you
32:30
in
32:30
your
32:30
tracks
32:31
like
32:31
it
32:31
did
32:31
when,
32:31
you
32:32
know,
32:32
in
32:32
25
32:32
and
32:33
30.
32:33
Yeah,
32:34
right.
32:34
And
32:34
you
32:34
can
32:35
kind
32:35
of
32:35
move
32:35
forward
32:36
and
32:37
move
32:37
just
32:38
being,
32:38
living
32:39
in
32:39
peace,
32:39
you
32:39
know,
32:40
and
32:40
being
32:40
reassured
32:41
that
32:41
I
32:42
don't
32:42
give
32:42
a
32:42
fuck,
32:42
you
32:43
know?
32:43
Right.
32:44
Why,
32:45
you
32:45
know,
32:45
why
32:46
not?
32:47
You
32:47
don't
32:47
get
32:47
there.
32:48
Like
32:48
again,
32:48
I'm
32:49
54
32:50
and
32:51
what
32:51
a
32:51
great
32:52
place
32:52
to
32:52
be
32:52
in
32:52
life.
32:53
Because
32:54
it's
32:54
not
32:54
that
32:54
I
32:55
don't
32:55
care
32:55
what
32:55
people
32:56
think
32:56
of
32:56
me.
32:57
I'm
32:57
wired
32:57
to,
32:58
like,
32:58
I
32:58
have
32:58
a
32:58
concern
32:59
for
32:59
people.
33:00
If
33:00
someone
33:01
says
33:01
I
33:01
hate
33:01
her,
33:01
like
33:03
that's
33:03
not
33:03
mine.
33:04
I
33:04
don't
33:05
know,
33:05
it's
33:06
none
33:06
of
33:06
my
33:06
business
33:07
what
33:07
they
33:07
think
33:07
of
33:08
me,
33:08
but
33:08
when
33:08
I
33:09
check
33:09
into
33:09
a
33:09
hotel
33:10
or
33:10
talk
33:10
to
33:11
the
33:11
Uber
33:11
driver,
33:12
I
33:13
care
33:13
that
33:13
when
33:13
I
33:13
get
33:13
out
33:14
of
33:14
their
33:14
car,
33:15
they
33:15
feel
33:16
that
33:16
the
33:17
experience
33:17
with
33:17
that
33:18
person
33:19
was
33:20
one
33:20
that
33:20
didn't
33:21
drain
33:21
them.
33:21
That
33:22
was
33:22
a
33:23
positive
33:23
interaction.
33:24
So
33:24
to
33:25
that
33:25
extent
33:26
I
33:26
care
33:26
that
33:26
people
33:26
think
33:27
she's,
33:27
she
33:27
was
33:28
nice,
33:28
that
33:28
was
33:28
a
33:28
nice
33:29
person.
33:31
But
33:32
losing,
33:34
losing
33:34
time
33:35
and
33:35
energy
33:36
around,
33:36
like,
33:37
do
33:37
people
33:37
like
33:38
me?
33:39
After
33:39
having
33:40
had
33:40
a
33:41
career
33:41
for
33:41
so
33:42
long
33:42
that
33:42
was
33:43
kind
33:43
of
33:43
predicated
33:44
on
33:45
fans
33:45
liking
33:46
you
33:46
and
33:46
believing
33:47
in
33:47
you,
33:48
I
33:48
can't
33:49
do
33:50
that
33:50
was
33:50
exhausting.
33:52
And
33:52
if
33:52
someone
33:53
decides
33:53
they
33:53
don't
33:53
like
33:54
me,
33:54
that's
33:54
okay.
33:55
I'm.
33:56
I
33:56
would
33:56
be
33:57
sure
33:57
that
33:57
they
33:57
don't
33:57
know
33:58
me.
33:58
I'm
33:58
a
33:58
likable
33:59
person.
34:00
I
34:00
like
34:01
myself.
34:01
The
34:01
people
34:02
who
34:03
are
34:03
in
34:03
my
34:03
life,
34:04
they
34:04
like
34:04
me.
34:04
I
34:05
make
34:05
them
34:05
laugh,
34:05
I
34:06
show
34:06
up
34:06
for
34:06
them,
34:07
they
34:07
show
34:07
up
34:07
for
34:07
me.
34:07
That's
34:08
all
34:08
I
34:08
need.
34:08
That's
34:09
the
34:09
evolution
34:09
too.
34:10
Right.
34:10
And
34:11
you've
34:11
been
34:12
so
34:12
open
34:12
about
34:13
mental
34:13
health.
34:14
Yeah.
34:14
So
34:14
my
34:16
nearly
34:16
ending
34:17
my
34:17
life,
34:17
there
34:17
is
34:17
a
34:18
mental
34:18
health
34:18
component
34:19
to
34:19
that.
34:19
No.
34:20
1.
34:21
My
34:21
sister
34:21
in
34:22
law
34:22
is
34:22
a
34:22
psychologist
34:23
and
34:24
I
34:24
asked
34:24
her
34:25
about
34:25
that,
34:25
like,
34:25
what
34:25
did
34:26
that
34:26
microcosm
34:27
of
34:27
that
34:27
really
34:27
dark
34:28
moment
34:28
look
34:28
like?
34:29
And
34:29
she
34:29
said,
34:29
you
34:30
know,
34:30
no
34:30
one
34:30
arrives
34:31
in
34:31
that
34:31
moment
34:31
without
34:32
having
34:32
a
34:32
mental
34:33
health
34:33
crisis.
34:34
Which
34:35
I
34:35
definitely
34:36
had.
34:38
It
34:38
was,
34:40
I
34:40
never
34:40
had
34:41
a
34:41
moment
34:41
like
34:41
that
34:41
before
34:42
then
34:43
or
34:43
after
34:44
then.
34:44
And
34:44
so
34:45
it
34:45
was
34:45
definitely
34:47
I
34:47
had
34:47
to
34:47
pay
34:47
close
34:48
attention
34:48
to.
34:49
I'm
34:49
not
34:49
in
34:49
a
34:50
good
34:50
place
34:50
if
34:50
I'm
34:51
actually
34:51
thinking
34:52
that
34:52
the
34:52
only
34:53
move
34:53
I've
34:53
got
34:54
is
34:54
to
34:55
put
34:55
a
34:55
9
34:55
millimeter
34:56
gun
34:56
in
34:56
my
34:56
mouth
34:57
and
34:57
pull
34:57
the
34:57
trigger.
34:58
And
34:59
by
34:59
the
34:59
way,
34:59
I
34:59
had
34:59
a
34:59
successful
35:00
life.
35:00
I
35:01
had
35:01
resources,
35:01
I
35:02
had
35:02
a
35:02
beautiful
35:03
home,
35:03
you
35:04
know,
35:04
friends,
35:05
no
35:05
one
35:05
really
35:05
knew
35:06
me.
35:06
Family,
35:06
they
35:07
didn't
35:07
really
35:07
know
35:07
all
35:08
of
35:08
me.
35:08
But
35:09
I
35:09
have
35:09
people.
35:10
If
35:10
I
35:10
could
35:10
find
35:11
myself
35:12
ready
35:12
to
35:12
pull
35:13
that
35:13
trigger,
35:15
a
35:15
lot
35:15
of
35:15
people
35:16
could,
35:16
right?
35:16
And
35:17
so
35:17
it
35:17
wasn't
35:17
that
35:17
I
35:17
was
35:18
destitute,
35:18
didn't
35:19
have
35:19
a
35:19
job,
35:20
you
35:20
know,
35:20
I
35:20
had
35:21
a
35:21
good
35:21
life
35:21
and.
35:22
And
35:22
I
35:23
still
35:23
contemplated
35:24
pulling
35:24
that
35:25
trigger.
35:26
And
35:26
so
35:26
there
35:26
was
35:27
a
35:27
mental
35:27
health
35:28
crisis
35:28
in
35:28
that
35:29
moment.
35:29
Something
35:29
was
35:30
not
35:30
right.
35:30
But
35:31
the
35:31
next
35:32
morning,
35:32
when
35:32
I
35:32
decided,
35:33
when
35:33
I
35:33
realized
35:34
I've
35:34
either
35:34
got
35:35
to.
35:35
I'm
35:35
either
35:35
going
35:35
to
35:35
die
35:36
here
35:36
in
35:36
this
35:36
house
35:37
or
35:37
I'm
35:38
going
35:38
to
35:38
come
35:38
out
35:39
when
35:39
I
35:40
tell
35:40
you
35:40
my
35:40
life
35:40
got
35:41
magical
35:42
from
35:42
that
35:42
moment.
35:43
I'm
35:44
not
35:44
exaggerating.
35:45
The
35:45
minute
35:46
I
35:46
realized
35:46
you're
35:47
going
35:47
to
35:47
come
35:47
out,
35:47
it
35:47
wasn't
35:48
like,
35:48
good.
35:48
I
35:48
was
35:49
like,
35:49
oh,
35:49
shit,
35:49
I'm
35:50
going
35:50
to
35:50
come
35:50
out.
35:50
What
35:50
does
35:50
that
35:50
look
35:51
like?
35:51
How
35:51
do
35:51
I
35:51
do
35:51
that?
35:53
That
35:53
seemed
35:54
hard
35:54
and
35:54
complicated,
35:55
but
35:55
I
35:55
put
35:55
my
35:55
strategy
35:56
hat
35:56
on.
35:57
But
35:58
everything
35:58
else
36:00
felt
36:01
magical.
36:02
And
36:02
when
36:02
I
36:02
say
36:03
that,
36:04
it's
36:04
that
36:05
I
36:05
took
36:05
this
36:06
one
36:06
step,
36:07
I'm
36:07
going
36:07
to
36:07
come
36:07
out.
36:07
And
36:08
this
36:08
road
36:09
kind
36:09
of
36:09
opened
36:10
up
36:10
in
36:10
front
36:11
of
36:11
me,
36:11
including
36:12
the
36:12
people
36:13
who
36:13
would
36:13
help
36:13
me
36:13
come
36:14
out.
36:14
Well,
36:15
including
36:15
the
36:16
right
36:16
publicist,
36:16
the
36:17
right
36:17
manager,
36:17
the
36:18
right.
36:18
I
36:19
had
36:19
finished
36:19
a
36:19
record
36:19
and
36:20
I
36:20
was
36:20
like,
36:20
no
36:21
one,
36:21
no
36:21
label
36:22
in
36:22
Nashville
36:22
is
36:22
going
36:22
to
36:22
put
36:23
this
36:23
out.
36:23
I
36:23
came
36:23
out
36:24
to
36:24
LA
36:24
and
36:24
sat
36:25
down
36:25
with
36:26
Kevin
36:27
Welk
36:27
of
36:27
Vanguard
36:28
Music.
36:28
And
36:29
he
36:29
had
36:29
already
36:30
said
36:30
he
36:30
wanted
36:30
the
36:30
record,
36:31
he
36:31
liked
36:31
the
36:31
record.
36:31
And
36:32
I
36:32
came
36:32
out
36:32
here
36:32
and
36:32
I
36:33
said,
36:33
so
36:33
grateful
36:34
you
36:34
like
36:34
the
36:34
record.
36:35
Sat
36:35
in
36:35
a
36:35
conference
36:36
room
36:36
with
36:36
his
36:36
team
36:37
and
36:37
someone,
36:38
you
36:38
know,
36:38
that
36:39
represented
36:39
me.
36:39
And
36:39
I
36:40
said,
36:40
I'm
36:40
really
36:41
glad
36:41
you
36:41
like
36:41
the
36:41
record,
36:42
but
36:42
I
36:42
do
36:42
have
36:43
to
36:43
give
36:43
you
36:43
some
36:43
news.
36:45
I'm
36:45
gay
36:46
and
36:46
I'm
36:46
going
36:46
to
36:46
come
36:47
out
36:47
of
36:47
the
36:47
closet.
36:48
And
36:48
I
36:48
wanted
36:48
to
36:48
make
36:48
sure
36:49
he
36:49
had
36:49
the
36:49
opportunity
36:50
to
36:50
save.
36:51
Well,
36:51
that's
36:52
not
36:52
going
36:52
to
36:52
work.
36:52
That's
36:52
going
36:52
to
36:53
be
36:53
too
36:53
hard
36:53
a
36:53
record
36:53
to
36:54
put
36:54
out.
36:54
And
36:54
he
36:55
looked
36:55
around
36:55
at
36:56
his
36:56
team
36:56
and
36:56
he
36:56
said,
36:57
okay.
36:58
He
36:58
said,
36:58
I'll
36:59
tell
36:59
you.
36:59
And
36:59
he
36:59
said,
36:59
when?
37:00
I
37:00
said,
37:00
I
37:00
don't
37:00
know
37:01
yet.
37:01
I'm
37:02
planning
37:02
how
37:02
to
37:02
come
37:03
out
37:03
well.
37:04
And
37:04
we
37:04
talked
37:04
through
37:05
it
37:05
and
37:05
I
37:06
told
37:06
him
37:06
what
37:06
I
37:06
was
37:06
thinking.
37:07
He
37:07
said,
37:07
okay,
37:09
we
37:09
will
37:09
put
37:10
out
37:10
your
37:10
record
37:10
when
37:11
you
37:11
are
37:11
ready
37:11
to
37:11
plan.
37:13
And
37:13
in
37:13
Record
37:13
label
37:14
worlds,
37:14
they
37:15
don't
37:15
do
37:15
that.
37:16
They
37:16
plan,
37:16
like,
37:17
years
37:17
in
37:17
advance
37:18
for
37:18
records.
37:18
And
37:19
if
37:20
you
37:20
miss
37:20
your
37:20
window
37:20
that
37:21
they've
37:21
allotted
37:21
for
37:21
you,
37:22
sorry,
37:22
we
37:23
can't
37:23
put
37:23
your
37:23
record
37:23
out
37:24
because
37:24
the
37:24
James
37:24
Taylor
37:25
record
37:25
is
37:26
coming
37:26
out,
37:26
because
37:26
the
37:26
X
37:27
person,
37:27
whatever
37:28
record
37:28
is
37:28
coming
37:28
out.
37:29
And
37:29
he
37:29
gave
37:30
me
37:30
such
37:30
a
37:30
gift
37:31
in
37:31
that
37:31
moment.
37:31
He
37:32
said,
37:32
when
37:32
you're
37:33
ready
37:33
to
37:33
put
37:34
this
37:34
record
37:34
out,
37:35
we're
37:35
with
37:35
you.
37:36
We
37:36
will
37:36
put
37:36
it
37:37
out
37:37
when
37:37
you're
37:37
ready.
37:38
And
37:38
then
37:38
it
37:39
would
37:39
be,
37:39
you
37:39
know,
37:40
another
37:40
two
37:40
and
37:40
a
37:41
half
37:41
years.
37:41
And
37:43
it
37:43
came
37:44
out.
37:44
The
37:44
day
37:44
I
37:44
came
37:44
out,
37:45
it's
37:46
like.
37:46
All
37:46
the
37:46
signs
37:47
were
37:47
pointing
37:47
to
37:47
you
37:48
taking
37:48
the
37:48
right
37:48
path,
37:49
you
37:49
know?
37:49
Exactly.
37:50
Everything
37:50
got
37:51
easy,
37:51
like,
37:53
relatively
37:54
easy.
37:54
And
37:55
that,
37:55
to
37:55
me,
37:55
when
37:56
things
37:56
start
37:56
is
37:56
when
37:57
that
37:57
flywheel
37:57
of
37:58
people
37:59
and
37:59
activity
38:00
and
38:00
things
38:00
happening
38:01
start
38:01
to
38:01
happen.
38:02
That's
38:02
when
38:02
you
38:02
know,
38:03
okay,
38:03
I'm
38:04
doing
38:04
the
38:04
right
38:04
thing.
38:04
I'm
38:04
on
38:05
the
38:05
right
38:05
path.
38:05
The
38:05
lights
38:05
are
38:05
green,
38:06
right?
38:06
The
38:06
lights
38:07
are
38:07
green.
38:07
And,
38:08
you
38:08
know,
38:08
you
38:09
mentioned,
38:09
by
38:10
all
38:10
appearances,
38:10
you
38:11
know,
38:11
you
38:11
look
38:11
like
38:11
you
38:11
had
38:12
everything
38:12
together.
38:12
You
38:13
know,
38:13
you've
38:13
got
38:13
this
38:13
successful
38:14
career,
38:15
you
38:15
live
38:15
in
38:15
a
38:15
beautiful
38:16
house,
38:16
you're
38:16
a
38:16
celebrity.
38:17
I
38:17
mean,
38:17
all
38:18
these
38:18
trappings
38:18
that
38:19
people
38:19
see
38:20
as
38:20
success,
38:21
but
38:23
little
38:23
did
38:23
the
38:23
outside
38:23
world
38:24
know
38:24
that
38:24
you
38:24
had
38:25
that
38:25
struggle.
38:25
Yeah.
38:26
So
38:26
how
38:26
do
38:26
we
38:26
get
38:27
better?
38:27
Checking
38:28
in
38:28
on
38:28
the
38:29
strong
38:29
ones
38:29
or
38:30
the
38:30
ones
38:30
to
38:30
appear
38:30
to
38:31
have
38:31
it
38:31
all?
38:31
You
38:32
know,
38:33
it's.
38:33
It's
38:33
a.
38:34
It's
38:34
a
38:35
great
38:35
question.
38:39
We
38:39
do
38:39
have
38:39
to
38:39
get
38:39
better,
38:40
Right.
38:40
We
38:40
are
38:41
not
38:41
very
38:41
good
38:41
at
38:41
it.
38:45
And
38:45
I
38:45
think,
38:46
you
38:46
know,
38:46
the.
38:46
The
38:47
people
38:47
who
38:47
have
38:48
had
38:48
either
38:49
an
38:49
isolated
38:50
mental
38:50
health
38:50
issue
38:51
like
38:51
I
38:51
had,
38:52
or
38:53
a
38:53
protracted
38:54
kind
38:54
of
38:54
lifelong
38:56
mental
38:56
health
38:57
issue,
39:00
I
39:00
think
39:01
those
39:01
people
39:01
raising
39:02
their
39:02
hands
39:02
and
39:03
sharing
39:03
their
39:04
stories
39:04
and
39:04
normalizing
39:06
what
39:07
that
39:07
looks
39:07
like
39:08
is
39:09
really
39:09
the
39:09
greatest
39:10
gift
39:10
people
39:10
can
39:11
give.
39:12
I
39:12
don't
39:12
know
39:12
if
39:12
you
39:12
know
39:13
who
39:13
Mark,
39:13
I
39:13
think
39:13
his
39:14
name
39:14
is
39:14
Duplass.
39:14
Oh,
39:15
yes,
39:15
absolutely.
39:16
Great
39:17
actor.
39:17
Yeah,
39:17
great
39:17
actor.
39:18
So,
39:19
you
39:19
know,
39:19
he
39:19
is
39:19
just
39:20
such
39:20
a
39:20
talented
39:21
guy.
39:21
He
39:21
does
39:22
production
39:22
as
39:22
well.
39:23
Writes
39:23
and
39:24
acts
39:24
filmmaker.
39:25
He.
39:26
I
39:26
don't
39:26
know
39:26
when
39:27
he
39:27
began
39:27
sharing
39:28
his
39:28
mental
39:28
health
39:29
story,
39:29
but
39:29
I
39:30
follow
39:30
him
39:30
on
39:30
Instagram
39:31
and
39:31
he
39:31
is
39:32
front
39:32
and
39:33
center
39:33
about
39:34
sharing
39:35
what
39:35
it
39:35
looks
39:35
like,
39:36
medications,
39:38
the
39:38
journey,
39:38
and
39:39
like,
39:39
guys,
39:39
I'm
39:39
not.
39:40
I'm
39:40
not
39:40
doing
39:40
great
39:40
today.
39:41
Not
39:41
in
39:41
a
39:41
great
39:41
place.
39:43
And
39:43
I
39:43
think
39:44
the
39:44
courage
39:44
to
39:45
use
39:45
your
39:45
public
39:46
capital
39:47
to
39:48
share
39:48
your
39:49
story
39:49
like
39:49
that
39:50
when
39:50
you,
39:50
you
39:50
know,
39:51
when
39:52
you
39:52
can
39:53
around
39:53
mental
39:54
health
39:54
is
39:54
literally
39:55
saving
39:56
and
39:56
changing
39:57
lives.
39:58
And.
39:58
And
39:59
so
39:59
when
39:59
Covid
40:00
happened,
40:01
you
40:01
know,
40:01
my
40:01
peers
40:01
in
40:02
music,
40:02
all
40:02
of
40:02
my
40:03
other
40:03
touring
40:03
musician
40:04
friends,
40:05
I,
40:06
I
40:07
knew
40:07
it
40:07
was
40:07
scary
40:07
for
40:08
all
40:08
of
40:08
us.
40:08
And
40:08
what
40:09
I
40:09
can
40:09
control,
40:10
what
40:10
I
40:10
can
40:10
do
40:10
is
40:11
control
40:11
my
40:11
outreach
40:12
to
40:13
others.
40:13
So
40:13
I
40:13
just
40:14
kind
40:14
of
40:14
each
40:15
day
40:15
I
40:16
made
40:16
it
40:16
a
40:16
point
40:16
to
40:17
reach
40:17
out
40:17
to
40:17
several
40:18
of
40:19
people
40:19
in
40:19
my
40:19
peer
40:20
group
40:20
that
40:20
I
40:20
knew
40:20
had
40:21
essentially
40:21
lost
40:21
their
40:22
jobs.
40:22
Right?
40:22
We
40:23
all
40:23
lost
40:23
our
40:23
jobs
40:24
at
40:24
the
40:24
same
40:24
time
40:25
with
40:25
no
40:25
problem.
40:25
And
40:26
we're
40:26
gig
40:26
workers,
40:27
right?
40:27
We
40:27
don't
40:27
get
40:27
a
40:28
corporate
40:28
check
40:29
and
40:30
we
40:30
don't
40:30
have
40:30
a
40:30
401k
40:31
and
40:31
we.
40:32
So
40:32
not
40:33
only
40:33
was
40:33
the
40:33
world
40:33
shutting
40:34
down,
40:34
we'd
40:35
lost
40:35
our
40:35
jobs,
40:35
we'd
40:36
lost
40:36
our
40:36
income.
40:36
Many
40:37
of
40:37
us
40:37
have
40:37
employees.
40:38
We
40:39
were
40:39
unable
40:40
to
40:40
care
40:40
for
40:40
our
40:40
employees.
40:41
So
40:42
I
40:42
made
40:42
it
40:42
a
40:43
practice.
40:43
Just
40:43
like
40:43
a
40:44
few
40:44
people
40:44
a
40:44
day
40:45
just
40:45
say,
40:45
you
40:46
know,
40:46
what's
40:46
your
40:46
number?
40:47
Meaning
40:48
where
40:49
10
40:49
being
40:49
great,
40:50
one
40:50
being,
40:50
you
40:50
know,
40:51
on
40:51
the
40:51
verge
40:52
of
40:52
something
40:52
really
40:52
dark.
40:53
What's
40:53
your
40:54
number?
40:54
And
40:55
this
40:55
kind
40:55
of
40:55
shorthand
40:56
language.
40:57
Oftentimes
40:57
I'd
40:58
get
40:58
back
40:59
just
40:59
a
40:59
number.
40:59
They
41:00
wouldn't
41:00
go
41:00
into
41:00
anything
41:01
every,
41:01
you
41:01
know,
41:01
oddly
41:02
we
41:02
were
41:02
all
41:02
busy
41:03
with
41:03
kids
41:03
and
41:04
we
41:04
were
41:04
in
41:05
isolation,
41:05
but
41:05
there
41:06
was
41:06
a
41:06
lot
41:06
going
41:06
on
41:06
and
41:07
sometimes
41:07
I
41:07
would
41:08
just
41:08
get
41:08
back
41:08
a
41:09
six,
41:10
what's
41:10
your
41:10
number?
41:10
And
41:11
be
41:11
like
41:11
I'm
41:11
in
41:11
an
41:12
eight
41:12
today.
41:13
Exo
41:13
heart.
41:16
I
41:16
loved
41:16
that
41:17
new
41:17
practice
41:17
for
41:17
me
41:18
and
41:18
I
41:18
think
41:18
if
41:18
we
41:18
could
41:19
all
41:20
just
41:20
check
41:20
in
41:20
with
41:21
one
41:21
another
41:21
in
41:21
that
41:22
way,
41:22
in
41:22
a
41:22
new
41:22
way
41:23
and
41:23
it
41:23
feels
41:23
counterintuitive,
41:24
it
41:24
feels
41:24
nosy,
41:25
it
41:26
feels
41:28
sometimes
41:29
ham
41:30
handed
41:31
but.
41:31
And
41:31
I
41:31
do
41:32
it
41:32
with
41:32
my
41:32
colleagues.
41:33
What's
41:33
your
41:33
number?
41:35
So
41:35
I
41:36
think
41:36
that's
41:36
a
41:37
kind
41:37
of
41:37
a
41:37
new
41:37
best
41:38
practices
41:38
that
41:39
we
41:39
can
41:39
all
41:39
too.
41:40
That's
41:40
really
41:40
nice
41:41
because
41:41
that
41:41
moment
41:41
could
41:42
have
41:42
been
41:42
the
41:42
meant
41:42
the
41:43
difference
41:43
between,
41:43
you
41:44
know,
41:44
somebody
41:45
caring
41:45
and
41:45
not
41:45
caring.
41:46
Like
41:46
for
41:47
them.
41:47
You
41:47
know,
41:47
it's,
41:47
it's,
41:48
it's,
41:48
it's
41:49
so
41:49
important.
41:49
It's,
41:50
it's
41:51
important.
41:51
And
41:51
I'm
41:51
curious,
41:52
what
41:52
are
41:52
your
41:52
interventions?
41:53
What
41:53
do
41:53
you,
41:54
what
41:55
have
41:55
you
41:55
learned
41:55
from
41:55
the
41:55
conversations
41:56
you've
41:56
been
41:56
having
41:57
with
41:57
people
41:57
and
41:58
about
41:58
how
41:58
to
41:58
check
41:59
in?
41:59
You
41:59
know,
41:59
I
42:00
think
42:00
very
42:01
much
42:01
like
42:01
you
42:01
were,
42:02
what
42:02
you
42:02
were
42:02
saying
42:02
is
42:02
the
42:03
outreach
42:03
is
42:03
so
42:04
important
42:04
because
42:04
I
42:05
think
42:05
now
42:06
where
42:06
we
42:06
are
42:06
in
42:07
this
42:07
world,
42:07
you
42:07
know,
42:07
it's
42:08
almost
42:08
like
42:08
looked
42:09
down
42:09
upon
42:09
to
42:09
reach
42:10
your
42:10
phone,
42:11
you
42:11
know,
42:11
give
42:11
somebody
42:12
a
42:12
call.
42:12
It's
42:12
almost
42:12
intrusive
42:13
like
42:13
you're
42:13
saying,
42:13
right?
42:14
I,
42:14
I
42:14
don't
42:14
call
42:14
anyone.
42:15
That's
42:15
too
42:15
much.
42:15
That's
42:16
a
42:16
bridge
42:16
too
42:16
far.
42:17
You
42:18
have
42:18
a
42:18
text.
42:19
I
42:19
hardly
42:20
ever
42:20
call
42:20
anybody
42:20
anyway.
42:21
Go
42:21
on.
42:21
Yeah,
42:21
no,
42:22
I
42:22
know
42:22
it's
42:22
because
42:23
honestly,
42:23
I
42:24
mean
42:24
used
42:24
to
42:24
10,
42:25
15
42:25
years
42:25
ago
42:26
I'd
42:26
pick
42:26
up
42:27
a
42:27
phone
42:27
and
42:27
call
42:27
somebody,
42:28
but
42:28
now
42:28
it's
42:28
almost
42:28
like
42:28
you
42:29
have
42:29
to
42:29
schedule
42:29
a
42:29
call.
42:30
You
42:30
know,
42:30
it's
42:30
a
42:30
whole,
42:31
a
42:31
whole
42:31
thing.
42:32
But
42:32
I
42:32
would
42:32
say
42:32
definitely
42:33
text.
42:33
I
42:33
mean,
42:34
DM
42:34
if
42:34
you
42:34
have
42:34
to,
42:35
you
42:35
know,
42:35
however
42:36
you
42:36
can
42:36
get
42:36
across
42:37
to
42:37
that
42:37
person.
42:38
And
42:38
I
42:38
think
42:38
too,
42:39
spending
42:39
quality
42:40
time
42:40
with
42:40
people
42:41
without
42:41
looking
42:41
at
42:42
the
42:42
phone,
42:42
you
42:42
know,
42:43
without,
42:43
you
42:43
know,
42:44
interruptions,
42:45
just
42:45
even
42:45
if
42:45
it's
42:46
a
42:46
10,
42:47
15,
42:47
20
42:48
minutes
42:48
a
42:48
day,
42:49
you
42:49
know,
42:49
that,
42:49
that
42:50
is
42:50
so
42:50
important.
42:50
I
42:50
know
42:51
we're
42:51
both
42:52
parents
42:52
as
42:52
well,
42:53
and
42:53
that
42:53
is
42:54
one
42:54
of
42:54
the
42:54
things
42:54
that
42:55
I
42:55
try
42:55
to,
42:55
especially
42:55
with
42:56
my
42:56
daughter,
42:56
is
42:56
give
42:57
her,
42:57
her,
42:57
you
42:57
know,
42:58
phone
42:58
free
42:59
20
43:00
minutes
43:00
of
43:00
me
43:00
a
43:00
day
43:01
where
43:01
it's
43:01
just,
43:02
you
43:02
know,
43:02
we're
43:02
talking.
43:02
We
43:03
could
43:03
even
43:03
be
43:03
in
43:03
the
43:03
car
43:04
driving,
43:05
whatever
43:05
that
43:05
is.
43:06
You
43:06
know,
43:06
it
43:06
sounds
43:07
easy
43:07
to
43:07
do
43:07
that
43:08
20
43:08
minutes
43:08
without
43:09
the
43:09
devices,
43:09
but
43:09
it's
43:10
super
43:10
valuable.
43:11
And
43:12
the
43:12
data
43:12
tells
43:13
us
43:13
that
43:13
with
43:13
our
43:14
kids.
43:15
Talking
43:15
to
43:15
our
43:16
kids
43:16
in
43:16
the
43:16
car
43:16
is
43:17
a
43:17
really
43:17
productive
43:19
way
43:19
to
43:19
have
43:20
conversations
43:20
with
43:20
kids
43:21
because
43:23
they
43:23
share
43:23
differently
43:24
in
43:24
a
43:24
car
43:25
because
43:25
it
43:26
feels
43:26
less
43:27
pressurized
43:28
and
43:28
there's
43:28
not
43:29
the
43:29
icon.
43:29
We're
43:29
not
43:29
looking
43:30
at
43:30
them.
43:30
You
43:30
know,
43:31
sometimes
43:31
may
43:31
feel
43:31
judged
43:33
taking
43:33
your
43:33
kid
43:33
and
43:34
saying,
43:34
come
43:34
run
43:34
an
43:35
errand
43:35
with
43:35
me
43:35
and
43:36
talking
43:36
to
43:36
them.
43:37
My
43:37
kids
43:37
give
43:37
it
43:37
all
43:38
up
43:38
in
43:38
the
43:38
car.
43:38
Do
43:39
they
43:40
share?
43:40
And
43:41
they,
43:41
they,
43:42
they
43:42
will
43:42
ask
43:43
questions
43:43
that,
43:44
that
43:44
are
43:44
fascinating
43:45
and
43:45
interesting
43:46
and
43:46
hilarious,
43:48
but
43:48
get
43:48
them
43:48
in
43:48
the
43:48
car.
43:49
That's
43:49
the
43:49
good
43:50
time
43:50
to
43:50
talk.
43:50
That's
43:50
good.
43:51
What
43:51
other
43:51
great
43:51
parenting
43:52
advice
43:52
have
43:53
you
43:53
learned
43:53
along
43:53
the
43:53
way
43:54
that
43:54
you've
43:54
really
43:55
implemented
43:55
in
43:55
your
43:56
own
43:56
home?
43:57
So
43:57
our
43:57
kids
43:58
developed
43:58
some
43:58
anxieties
43:59
during,
44:01
during
44:01
COVID
44:02
for
44:03
good
44:03
reason.
44:03
Right.
44:04
Typically
44:04
when
44:05
scary
44:05
things
44:06
go
44:06
on
44:06
in
44:06
the
44:06
world,
44:06
we
44:07
could
44:07
say,
44:08
trust
44:08
me,
44:09
everything's
44:09
okay.
44:10
We
44:10
didn't
44:10
know
44:10
that
44:11
everything
44:11
was
44:11
okay.
44:12
And
44:13
so
44:14
although
44:14
we
44:15
were
44:15
comforting
44:15
them,
44:16
but
44:16
we
44:16
didn't,
44:17
we
44:17
couldn't
44:18
make
44:18
any,
44:18
any
44:18
promises
44:19
about
44:19
anything.
44:19
A
44:20
couple
44:20
of
44:20
nannies,
44:21
you
44:21
know,
44:21
in
44:21
our
44:21
kids
44:22
friendship
44:22
circle,
44:23
like
44:23
died
44:23
during
44:23
COVID
44:24
I
44:24
mean,
44:25
we
44:25
lived
44:25
in
44:25
New
44:25
York
44:26
a
44:26
few
44:26
blocks
44:27
from
44:27
a
44:27
hospital.
44:28
There
44:28
were
44:28
sight,
44:29
you
44:29
know,
44:29
it
44:29
was
44:30
a
44:30
scary
44:30
time
44:31
to
44:31
be
44:31
in
44:31
New
44:31
York.
44:32
And
44:33
they
44:33
developed,
44:34
they
44:34
began
44:34
having
44:35
bad
44:35
dreams.
44:37
And,
44:39
and
44:39
so
44:39
in
44:39
a
44:40
kind
44:40
of
44:40
a.
44:40
What
44:40
we
44:41
think
44:41
my
44:41
wife
44:41
and
44:41
I
44:41
think
44:42
was
44:42
kind
44:42
of
44:42
a
44:42
genius
44:43
parenting
44:43
moment.
44:44
They
44:44
were
44:44
afraid
44:44
to
44:44
go
44:45
to
44:45
bed
44:45
one
44:45
night.
44:46
And,
44:47
and
44:48
I
44:48
said,
44:48
they
44:48
said,
44:49
one
44:49
of
44:50
them,
44:50
I
44:50
think
44:50
it
44:50
was
44:50
George,
44:51
I'm
44:51
gonna
44:51
have
44:51
a
44:52
bad
44:52
dream.
44:52
And
44:52
I
44:52
said,
44:52
oh,
44:53
hold
44:53
on.
44:54
Lauren
44:54
and
44:54
I
44:54
went
44:55
to
44:55
our
44:55
bathroom
44:55
and
44:55
came
44:55
back
44:56
with
44:56
a
44:56
Little
44:57
like
44:57
lotion
44:57
that
44:58
we
44:58
had.
44:58
And
44:59
I
44:59
said,
44:59
we
44:59
just
44:59
got
45:00
this,
45:00
like,
45:01
put
45:01
some
45:01
of
45:01
this
45:01
on
45:01
it,
45:02
just
45:02
a
45:02
dot
45:02
right
45:02
here
45:02
and
45:02
rub
45:03
it
45:03
in.
45:04
And
45:05
he
45:05
said,
45:05
what
45:05
is
45:05
it?
45:06
And
45:06
I
45:06
said,
45:06
it's
45:06
good
45:06
dream
45:07
cream.
45:07
And
45:08
it's
45:08
just
45:08
like,
45:08
it
45:08
keeps
45:09
the
45:09
dreams,
45:10
the
45:10
bad
45:10
dreams
45:11
away.
45:11
It
45:11
helps
45:11
at
45:12
least.
45:12
No
45:12
promises,
45:13
but
45:13
it
45:13
helps.
45:14
And
45:14
we
45:14
began
45:14
that
45:15
routine
45:15
that
45:15
every
45:15
night
45:16
they
45:16
would
45:16
put
45:16
on
45:17
good
45:17
dream
45:17
cream.
45:18
They
45:18
still
45:18
ask
45:18
for
45:19
it.
45:19
And
45:20
you
45:20
know,
45:20
my
45:20
wife
45:21
and
45:21
I
45:21
ended
45:21
up,
45:21
you
45:22
know,
45:22
we,
45:23
we
45:24
launched
45:24
a
45:24
product,
45:25
oddly
45:25
enough,
45:25
called
45:26
Good
45:26
Dream
45:26
Cream.
45:27
And
45:27
people
45:28
are
45:28
finding.
45:28
And
45:28
it
45:29
smells
45:29
good
45:29
for
45:29
adults
45:30
too.
45:30
But
45:30
just
45:31
getting
45:31
into
45:31
those
45:33
practices
45:34
of
45:34
comfort
45:35
and
45:36
routine,
45:36
the
45:36
bedtime
45:37
and
45:37
the
45:37
wake
45:37
up
45:38
time
45:38
routines
45:38
are
45:39
really
45:39
important.
45:41
And
45:41
so
45:41
I
45:42
would
45:42
get
45:42
into
45:42
bed
45:42
with
45:43
the
45:43
boys
45:43
and
45:43
do
45:43
something
45:44
I
45:44
called
45:44
tag
45:44
team,
45:45
which
45:45
means
45:46
one
45:46
of
45:46
them
45:46
starts
45:47
a
45:47
story,
45:47
just
45:48
one
45:48
line,
45:48
and
45:48
then
45:48
the
45:49
next
45:49
boy
45:50
adds
45:50
the
45:50
next
45:50
line
45:50
of
45:51
the
45:51
story.
45:51
And
45:51
then
45:51
I
45:52
do.
45:52
And
45:52
we
45:52
got
45:53
into
45:53
the
45:53
practice
45:53
of
45:54
creating,
45:54
collaborating
45:55
a
45:55
nighttime
45:56
story
45:56
together.
45:57
And
45:57
often,
45:57
yes,
45:58
it
45:58
was
45:58
about
45:58
poop
45:59
and
46:00
chocolate
46:01
candy
46:02
and,
46:02
you
46:02
know,
46:03
video
46:03
games.
46:03
But
46:03
it
46:04
was
46:04
something
46:04
we
46:05
did
46:05
together
46:05
and
46:05
they
46:05
could
46:06
count
46:06
on
46:06
it.
46:06
It
46:06
was
46:07
like,
46:07
kind
46:07
of
46:07
like
46:07
a
46:07
touchstone
46:09
throughout
46:09
the
46:09
day.
46:09
So
46:10
I
46:10
think
46:10
routine,
46:11
routine.
46:12
And
46:12
the
46:12
routine
46:12
you've
46:13
developed
46:13
with
46:13
your
46:13
daughter,
46:14
you
46:14
have
46:14
a
46:14
routine
46:15
of
46:15
she
46:15
gets
46:16
all
46:16
of
46:16
you
46:17
for
46:17
20
46:17
minutes.
46:18
Yes.
46:18
And
46:19
I
46:19
think
46:19
routines
46:19
for
46:19
grownups
46:20
are
46:20
important
46:21
too.
46:21
It
46:21
is
46:21
self
46:22
soothing.
46:22
And,
46:23
you
46:23
know,
46:23
you
46:23
go
46:23
to
46:23
bed
46:24
before
46:24
I
46:24
go
46:24
to
46:24
bed
46:24
every
46:24
night
46:25
I
46:25
put
46:25
lotion
46:25
on
46:25
my
46:25
feet.
46:26
Right.
46:26
And
46:26
it's,
46:27
it's
46:27
kind
46:27
of
46:27
Pavlovian
46:28
and
46:28
I'm
46:28
very
46:28
softy,
46:29
but
46:30
it's
46:30
Pavlovian.
46:30
If
46:31
you,
46:31
if
46:31
I
46:31
put
46:31
lotion
46:31
on
46:32
my
46:32
feet,
46:32
even
46:32
like
46:32
midday,
46:33
if
46:33
I
46:33
were
46:33
to
46:33
do
46:34
it,
46:34
kind
46:35
of
46:35
get
46:35
a
46:35
little
46:35
sleepy.
46:36
Sure.
46:37
Routine.
46:37
Routine
46:37
is
46:38
everything.
46:38
That's
46:38
a
46:39
good,
46:39
that's
46:39
good
46:39
on
46:40
the
46:40
spot
46:40
thinking
46:40
too.
46:41
You're
46:41
a
46:41
good
46:42
dream
46:42
cream.
46:42
Right?
46:43
Amazing.
46:44
And
46:44
they
46:44
believed
46:45
it.
46:45
And
46:45
now
46:45
they
46:45
know.
46:45
They're
46:46
like,
46:46
you
46:46
guys
46:47
made
46:47
that
46:47
up.
46:47
And
46:47
we're
46:48
like,
46:48
of
46:48
course
46:48
we
46:48
did.
46:49
But
46:49
they
46:49
still
46:49
like
46:50
their
46:50
good
46:50
dream
46:50
cream.
46:51
And
46:51
the
46:51
olfactory,
46:53
our
46:53
olfactory
46:54
systems,
46:55
our
46:55
scent
46:55
of
46:56
smell
46:56
is
46:56
the
46:57
most
46:57
powerful.
46:59
So
46:59
like,
47:00
do
47:00
you
47:00
ever.
47:01
You
47:01
smell
47:02
someone
47:02
that
47:02
has
47:02
a
47:03
perfume
47:03
that
47:03
your
47:03
mom
47:03
used
47:04
to
47:04
wear,
47:04
you
47:04
smell
47:04
it
47:05
and
47:05
you're
47:05
like,
47:05
you're
47:05
15
47:06
again.
47:07
It's
47:07
a
47:07
really
47:08
powerful
47:10
sense.
47:10
And
47:10
so
47:11
if
47:11
you
47:11
can
47:11
trigger
47:11
that,
47:12
and
47:13
that's
47:14
what
47:14
the
47:14
good
47:14
dream
47:15
cream
47:15
does,
47:15
it
47:15
just
47:15
makes
47:16
you,
47:17
it
47:17
takes
47:17
you
47:17
back
47:18
to
47:18
that
47:18
spot
47:18
of
47:19
calm
47:19
where
47:20
your
47:20
mom
47:20
is
47:20
snuggling.
47:21
You
47:21
for
47:21
bed
47:22
and
47:23
so
47:23
nice.
47:24
It's
47:24
a
47:24
powerful.
47:25
It's
47:25
comforting.
47:25
Yeah.
47:26
Well,
47:27
you
47:27
mentioned
47:27
launching
47:28
your
47:28
business
47:28
and
47:29
you've
47:29
also
47:29
stepped
47:29
into
47:30
the
47:30
corporate
47:30
world.
47:31
Oh
47:32
my
47:32
gosh,
47:33
you
47:33
are
47:34
busy,
47:34
busy
47:34
be
47:34
now.
47:35
I,
47:36
you
47:36
know,
47:36
I've
47:36
always
47:36
got
47:37
again.
47:37
I
47:37
had
47:37
paper
47:38
route
47:38
in
47:38
first
47:38
grade.
47:38
I
47:39
am,
47:39
I
47:40
am
47:40
the
47:40
quintessential
47:41
kind
47:41
of
47:42
hustler
47:43
entrepreneur.
47:44
And
47:44
having
47:45
grown
47:45
up
47:45
with
47:46
my
47:46
parents,
47:46
as
47:46
parents
47:47
they
47:47
were,
47:48
we
47:48
didn't
47:48
have
47:49
much
47:49
but
47:49
what
47:49
we
47:49
did,
47:50
what,
47:50
what
47:51
we
47:51
watched
47:51
them
47:51
do,
47:51
they
47:52
did
47:52
it
47:52
with
47:53
measure
47:53
and
47:54
care
47:54
and
47:56
they
47:57
put
47:57
a
47:57
premium
47:57
on
47:57
quality.
47:58
Whatever
47:58
you
47:58
do,
48:00
do
48:00
it
48:00
well.
48:01
And
48:01
they
48:01
would
48:02
say,
48:02
don't
48:02
half
48:02
ass
48:03
it.
48:03
Don't
48:03
half
48:04
ass
48:04
anything.
48:04
So
48:05
whatever
48:05
you
48:05
do,
48:06
be
48:06
the
48:07
best
48:07
at
48:07
it
48:07
and
48:07
do
48:08
it
48:08
well.
48:08
And
48:08
so
48:10
when
48:10
I
48:10
came
48:10
out
48:10
of
48:11
the
48:11
closet
48:11
in
48:11
2010,
48:12
that
48:12
began
48:13
what
48:13
I
48:13
called
48:14
for
48:14
a
48:14
long
48:14
time
48:14
my
48:15
side
48:15
hustle
48:16
of
48:16
working
48:17
as
48:17
a
48:17
consultant
48:18
for
48:18
in
48:19
corporate
48:19
spaces
48:20
Higher
48:20
ed
48:20
faith
48:21
communities.
48:22
What
48:22
began
48:23
as
48:23
like
48:23
sharing
48:24
my
48:24
story.
48:24
But
48:24
then
48:24
I
48:25
quickly
48:25
saw
48:25
that
48:26
it's
48:26
culture
48:27
work.
48:27
It
48:27
was
48:27
early
48:28
D
48:28
and
48:28
I
48:28
work
48:30
what
48:30
would
48:30
go
48:30
on
48:31
to
48:31
become
48:31
called
48:31
dei.
48:32
But
48:32
I
48:33
began
48:33
to
48:33
see
48:33
the
48:34
power
48:34
of
48:34
storytelling
48:35
and
48:36
working
48:36
in
48:37
corporate
48:37
spaces.
48:38
And
48:38
I
48:38
loved
48:38
it
48:38
so
48:39
much.
48:40
And
48:41
I
48:41
actually
48:41
had
48:41
more
48:42
of
48:42
that
48:42
work
48:42
than
48:43
I
48:43
wanted
48:43
to
48:43
do.
48:45
But
48:45
I
48:45
kind
48:45
of
48:45
kept
48:45
it
48:46
at
48:46
30%
48:47
of
48:47
my
48:47
time.
48:47
And
48:48
the
48:48
other
48:48
70
48:49
was
48:49
touring,
48:49
writing
48:49
and
48:50
making
48:50
records.
48:51
So
48:52
when
48:52
Covid
48:52
hit
48:52
all
48:53
of
48:53
my
48:53
existing
48:54
clients
48:54
were
48:55
reaching
48:55
out
48:55
like
48:56
can
48:56
we
48:56
do
48:56
a
48:56
virtual
48:57
event?
48:57
And
48:59
no
48:59
longer
48:59
did
48:59
I
49:00
have
49:00
to
49:00
get
49:00
on
49:00
a
49:00
plane
49:01
and
49:01
go
49:01
be
49:02
in
49:02
Des
49:02
Moines
49:03
or
49:03
Philadelphia
49:04
for
49:04
three
49:04
days.
49:06
I
49:06
could
49:06
do
49:07
corporate
49:07
work
49:08
through
49:09
virtual
49:10
work.
49:10
And
49:11
it
49:11
really
49:12
opened
49:12
up
49:12
the
49:13
potential
49:13
to
49:13
do
49:13
that
49:14
work.
49:14
And
49:15
it
49:15
was
49:15
the
49:15
time
49:15
when
49:15
George
49:16
Floyd
49:16
had
49:17
and
49:17
murdered
49:17
Breonna
49:18
Taylor.
49:19
There
49:19
were
49:19
and
49:20
it
49:20
was
49:20
a
49:20
pandemic
49:21
and
49:21
people
49:21
were
49:21
looking
49:22
for
49:22
connectivity
49:23
and
49:23
safe
49:24
spaces
49:24
to
49:25
connect.
49:26
So
49:26
that
49:26
work
49:27
kind
49:27
of
49:27
all
49:28
of
49:28
my
49:28
clients
49:28
were
49:28
like
49:28
can
49:28
you
49:29
do?
49:29
I
49:29
was,
49:29
I
49:29
was
49:30
very
49:30
busy
49:30
in
49:31
the
49:31
first
49:31
part
49:31
of
49:31
COVID
49:32
and
49:32
in
49:32
the
49:32
summer
49:33
of
49:33
COVID
49:33
2020
49:34
I
49:34
took
49:34
a
49:35
took
49:35
on
49:35
a
49:35
new
49:35
client
49:36
in
49:36
a
49:36
global
49:37
design
49:37
build
49:38
firm.
49:39
And
49:39
they
49:40
I
49:40
would
49:40
eventually
49:41
after
49:41
a
49:41
few
49:41
months
49:41
of
49:42
doing
49:42
that,
49:42
they
49:42
asked
49:42
me
49:42
to
49:42
come
49:43
on
49:43
full
49:43
time.
49:44
So
49:44
I
49:44
did
49:44
that
49:45
for
49:46
four
49:46
plus
49:46
years.
49:47
And
49:48
I'm
49:48
still
49:48
on
49:49
their
49:49
board
49:49
advisor
49:50
to
49:50
their
49:50
board.
49:50
But
49:51
I've
49:51
since
49:51
pivoted
49:52
to
49:52
a
49:52
company
49:52
called
49:53
iss.
49:54
And
49:54
we
49:54
are
49:54
a
49:55
global
49:55
facilities
49:56
management
49:57
firm.
49:58
And
49:58
what
49:58
we
49:58
do
49:59
is
49:59
bring
49:59
the
49:59
built
50:00
environment
50:00
to
50:00
life.
50:01
Corporate
50:02
dining,
50:03
janitorial,
50:05
technical
50:05
services,
50:06
vertical
50:06
transportation,
50:07
which
50:08
means
50:08
escalators.
50:08
And
50:09
elevators.
50:10
And
50:10
so
50:11
we
50:11
do
50:11
all
50:11
of
50:11
the
50:11
things
50:12
that
50:13
bring
50:14
the
50:14
built
50:14
environment
50:14
to
50:15
Life.
50:15
We
50:15
have
50:15
325,000
50:17
placemakers
50:18
around
50:19
the
50:19
globe.
50:19
We're
50:19
the
50:20
oldest,
50:21
biggest
50:21
janitorial
50:22
company
50:22
in
50:22
the
50:23
world.
50:23
And
50:24
our
50:24
people
50:24
who
50:25
go
50:25
to
50:25
work
50:25
every
50:25
day
50:26
are
50:27
people
50:27
who
50:27
punch
50:28
a
50:28
time
50:28
clock
50:29
and
50:30
do
50:30
the
50:30
really
50:31
honorable
50:32
work
50:34
that
50:34
is
50:35
often
50:35
unnoticed.
50:36
And
50:37
what's
50:37
excited
50:38
me
50:38
about
50:38
coming
50:38
in,
50:39
the
50:39
reason
50:39
I
50:40
came
50:40
into
50:40
this
50:40
role
50:41
is
50:41
that
50:41
I
50:42
get
50:42
to
50:42
make
50:42
sure
50:43
that
50:43
we
50:43
are
50:43
seeing
50:44
them,
50:45
providing,
50:47
hearing
50:47
them,
50:48
making
50:48
sure
50:49
that
50:49
we
50:49
are
50:49
impacting
50:50
their
50:51
livelihoods
50:52
and
50:52
their
50:52
families
50:53
livelihoods
50:53
in
50:53
a
50:54
positive
50:54
way
50:54
and
50:55
most
50:55
importantly,
50:56
impacting
50:57
the
50:57
communities
50:59
where
50:59
they
50:59
come
51:00
from.
51:01
And
51:01
so
51:01
I
51:01
get
51:01
to
51:02
make
51:02
sure
51:02
that
51:02
we
51:02
are
51:03
doing
51:03
good.
51:04
Our
51:04
company,
51:04
historically
51:05
in
51:05
its
51:05
DNA,
51:06
is
51:07
values
51:08
minded.
51:08
We
51:09
were
51:09
doing
51:10
belonging
51:10
and
51:10
inclusion
51:11
work
51:11
before
51:11
anyone
51:12
was
51:12
talking
51:12
about
51:13
it.
51:15
And
51:15
so
51:16
I.
51:16
It's
51:16
a
51:17
joy,
51:17
it's
51:18
a
51:18
real
51:18
honor
51:18
and
51:19
a
51:19
pleasure
51:20
to
51:21
get
51:21
to
51:22
do
51:22
good
51:22
by
51:22
our
51:23
people
51:23
and
51:24
grow
51:24
the
51:25
business
51:25
in
51:25
ways
51:26
that
51:26
reflect
51:26
our
51:27
values
51:27
and
51:28
really
51:29
bring
51:29
to
51:29
life
51:30
the
51:30
stories
51:30
of
51:31
our
51:31
placemakers.
51:33
How
51:33
did
51:33
your
51:33
previous
51:34
career
51:34
in
51:34
country
51:35
music,
51:35
singing
51:36
and
51:36
songwriting
51:37
prepare
51:37
you
51:38
for
51:38
this
51:38
position?
51:39
Now
51:40
it's
51:41
a
51:41
great
51:41
question.
51:42
And
51:42
I
51:42
think,
51:42
you
51:43
know,
51:43
there
51:43
was
51:43
a
51:43
headline
51:43
recently
51:44
when
51:44
my
51:45
new
51:45
role
51:45
was
51:45
announced
51:47
and
51:47
the
51:47
headline,
51:47
A
51:48
friend
51:48
of
51:48
mine,
51:48
a
51:48
colleague,
51:49
snapshot
51:49
it
51:49
and
51:50
sent
51:51
it
51:51
to
51:51
me
51:51
and
51:52
she
51:52
said
51:53
the
51:53
headline,
51:53
meh.
51:54
And
51:55
it
51:55
was
51:56
queer
51:56
country
51:57
music
51:57
singer
51:59
pivots
52:00
to
52:01
the
52:01
C
52:01
suite
52:02
in
52:02
corporate.
52:03
In
52:03
a
52:03
corporate
52:04
space.
52:05
And
52:05
she
52:05
was
52:05
like,
52:06
the
52:06
headline,
52:06
meh.
52:07
And
52:07
I
52:07
said,
52:08
yeah,
52:08
meh.
52:09
I
52:09
said,
52:09
but
52:09
also,
52:11
I
52:11
am
52:11
the
52:11
only
52:12
person
52:12
on
52:12
the
52:13
planet
52:13
about
52:13
whom
52:14
that
52:14
headline
52:14
can
52:15
be
52:15
written.
52:16
That's.
52:17
That
52:17
is
52:17
a
52:17
good
52:17
point.
52:18
That
52:18
is
52:18
true.
52:18
Right?
52:19
Yeah,
52:19
that's
52:20
really
52:20
cool,
52:20
actually.
52:21
So
52:21
when
52:21
we
52:21
think
52:22
of
52:22
when
52:22
I
52:22
think
52:22
about
52:24
what
52:24
I
52:25
did
52:25
as
52:26
when
52:26
I
52:26
did,
52:26
you
52:27
know,
52:27
in
52:27
the
52:27
music
52:28
business,
52:29
if
52:29
you.
52:29
The
52:29
music
52:30
is
52:30
important,
52:30
very
52:31
important.
52:31
And
52:32
I'm
52:32
good,
52:32
I'm
52:32
good
52:33
at
52:33
it.
52:34
You
52:34
are
52:34
a
52:34
good
52:34
singer.
52:35
Yes,
52:35
lady,
52:35
you
52:35
are.
52:37
And
52:37
I
52:37
think
52:38
that
52:38
the
52:38
business
52:39
part
52:39
of
52:39
it
52:40
is
52:40
why
52:40
I've
52:40
had
52:41
a
52:41
long
52:41
career,
52:42
because
52:43
I
52:43
loved
52:44
the
52:44
business
52:45
piece
52:45
of
52:45
the
52:46
music
52:46
business.
52:47
And
52:48
it
52:48
is
52:48
often
52:49
the
52:49
most
52:50
important
52:50
piece.
52:53
If
52:53
you
52:53
look
52:53
at.
52:54
There
52:54
are
52:54
a
52:54
lot
52:54
of
52:55
artists
52:55
that
52:55
have
52:55
come
52:55
and
52:56
gone,
52:57
many
52:57
of
52:57
them,
52:57
you
52:58
can.
52:58
There's
52:58
a
52:58
cause,
52:59
a
52:59
correlation
53:00
between
53:01
they
53:01
weren't
53:01
paying
53:01
attention
53:02
to
53:03
the
53:03
business
53:03
side
53:04
or
53:04
I
53:05
just
53:05
go
53:05
where
53:05
my
53:05
manager
53:06
tells
53:06
me
53:06
to
53:06
go.
53:07
I
53:07
just
53:07
show
53:07
up
53:07
here.
53:08
It's
53:08
really
53:08
hard
53:09
to
53:09
sustain
53:10
a
53:10
long
53:10
bit.
53:10
Except
53:11
for
53:11
the
53:11
artists
53:12
like
53:13
that
53:13
are
53:14
unusual
53:14
and,
53:15
you
53:15
know,
53:15
superstars.
53:16
But
53:16
then
53:16
again
53:17
I
53:17
could
53:17
argue
53:17
the
53:17
case
53:18
that
53:19
they're
53:19
superstars
53:20
because
53:20
they
53:20
took
53:21
care
53:21
of
53:21
their
53:21
business.
53:23
And
53:23
so
53:23
the
53:24
things
53:24
that
53:24
I
53:24
was
53:24
good
53:25
at,
53:25
and
53:25
I
53:25
knew
53:25
it
53:26
even
53:26
before
53:26
I
53:26
got
53:26
to
53:27
Nashville,
53:27
I
53:27
was
53:27
good
53:28
at
53:29
discipline,
53:31
planning,
53:32
strategy,
53:33
execution.
53:35
P
53:35
and
53:35
L.
53:36
Like,
53:36
I
53:37
always
53:37
was
53:37
watching
53:38
my
53:38
money,
53:38
and
53:38
that
53:39
I
53:39
did.
53:39
When
53:39
I
53:40
had
53:40
a
53:40
paper
53:40
route
53:40
in
53:40
first
53:41
grade,
53:42
I
53:42
knew
53:42
what
53:43
I
53:43
was
53:43
spending
53:44
and
53:44
what
53:44
I
53:44
needed
53:45
to
53:45
do
53:45
to
53:45
make
53:46
a
53:46
profit.
53:47
And
53:48
so
53:48
all
53:48
of
53:48
those
53:49
kind
53:49
of,
53:50
you
53:50
know,
53:50
skills
53:51
that
53:51
I
53:51
learned,
53:51
leadership,
53:53
storytelling,
53:53
understanding
53:54
my
53:54
audience,
53:55
whether
53:55
it
53:55
be
53:55
my
53:56
band
53:56
and
53:56
my
53:56
crew
53:57
or
53:58
a
53:58
thousand
53:59
people
53:59
in
53:59
a
54:00
venue,
54:00
I
54:01
understood.
54:01
Or
54:02
a
54:02
record
54:02
buying
54:03
public
54:03
that
54:04
was
54:04
waiting
54:05
for
54:05
my
54:05
next
54:05
record
54:06
or
54:06
came
54:06
to
54:06
my
54:06
show
54:06
and
54:07
wanted
54:07
to
54:07
meet
54:07
me
54:07
afterward
54:08
and
54:08
for
54:09
me
54:09
to
54:09
sign
54:09
an
54:10
autograph.
54:11
All
54:11
of
54:11
those
54:12
kind
54:12
of
54:13
skills
54:14
on
54:14
how
54:14
to
54:15
pay
54:15
attention
54:16
to
54:17
your
54:17
brand
54:17
and
54:19
what
54:19
the
54:19
deliverable
54:20
is
54:21
were
54:21
very.
54:22
I
54:22
recognized
54:23
it
54:23
after
54:23
I
54:23
came
54:23
out
54:24
and
54:24
saw
54:24
that
54:24
my
54:24
corporate
54:25
clients,
54:25
they
54:26
were
54:26
finding
54:26
value
54:27
in
54:28
my
54:28
deliverable
54:29
and
54:29
how
54:29
I
54:29
delivered
54:30
it.
54:30
And
54:31
so
54:32
all
54:32
of
54:32
that
54:33
and
54:34
probably
54:34
that
54:34
I
54:34
began
54:35
buying
54:35
rental
54:35
houses
54:36
in
54:37
the
54:37
late
54:37
90s.
54:38
I
54:38
understood
54:39
the
54:39
built
54:40
environment
54:40
and
54:41
I
54:41
understood
54:41
construction,
54:42
and
54:42
I
54:42
understood,
54:43
you
54:43
know,
54:44
making
54:44
sure
54:44
that
54:45
I've
54:46
got
54:46
three
54:46
H
54:46
vac
54:47
guys
54:47
or
54:47
gals,
54:48
but
54:48
they
54:48
were
54:48
all
54:48
guys.
54:49
I
54:49
made
54:50
sure
54:51
I
54:51
knew
54:52
which
54:52
plumbers
54:52
did
54:52
good
54:53
work.
54:54
And
54:55
having
54:55
those
54:55
people
54:55
that,
54:56
hey,
54:56
Ron,
54:56
the
54:57
plumbing
54:57
is
54:57
out
54:57
in
54:58
whatever
54:58
property.
54:59
Can
54:59
you
54:59
hustle
54:59
over
55:00
there?
55:01
My
55:02
plumber
55:02
and
55:02
my
55:03
vendors
55:03
and
55:03
my
55:04
suppliers
55:04
and
55:05
tradespeople
55:07
were
55:07
always.
55:08
They
55:08
always
55:08
took
55:08
care
55:09
of
55:09
me
55:09
because
55:09
I
55:09
always
55:10
took
55:10
care
55:10
of
55:10
them.
55:11
So
55:11
I
55:12
understood
55:12
how
55:12
the
55:12
ecosystem
55:13
of
55:14
subcontractors,
55:15
vendors,
55:16
suppliers
55:17
worked,
55:17
and
55:17
that
55:18
suited
55:18
me
55:19
well
55:19
in
55:19
the
55:19
built
55:20
environment,
55:20
which
55:20
I'm
55:21
in
55:21
right
55:21
now.
55:21
So
55:21
I
55:22
think
55:22
everything
55:23
I
55:23
did,
55:23
it's
55:23
almost
55:24
like
55:24
everything
55:25
I've
55:25
done
55:25
in
55:25
my
55:25
life
55:26
prepared
55:27
me
55:27
for
55:27
this
55:28
job
55:28
and
55:28
this
55:29
moment.
55:29
And
55:30
I
55:30
think
55:30
one
55:30
of
55:30
the
55:31
blessings
55:32
that
55:32
I
55:32
have
55:32
in
55:33
my
55:33
life
55:33
is
55:33
that
55:34
wherever
55:35
I
55:35
am,
55:35
that's
55:35
always
55:36
my
55:36
mindset.
55:36
That,
55:37
oh,
55:37
everything
55:38
I
55:38
did
55:38
brought
55:38
me
55:38
to
55:38
that.
55:39
This
55:39
moment.
55:40
Whether
55:40
it's
55:41
putting
55:41
out
55:41
my
55:41
memoir
55:42
or
55:42
the
55:42
book
55:42
I
55:43
had
55:43
out
55:43
a
55:43
couple
55:43
of
55:43
years
55:44
ago,
55:44
my
55:44
moment.
55:45
It's
55:46
as
55:46
if
55:47
everything
55:47
I
55:47
do
55:48
prepares
55:48
me
55:48
for
55:49
today.
55:49
And
55:50
it's
55:50
just
55:51
kind
55:51
of
55:51
a
55:51
tiny
55:51
miracle.
55:52
Every
55:52
day
55:52
I'm
55:53
like,
55:54
I
55:54
don't
55:54
think
55:54
there's
55:54
anyone
55:55
else
55:55
on
55:55
the
55:55
planet
55:56
who
55:56
could
55:56
be
55:57
in
55:58
this
55:58
chair
55:59
talking
55:59
to
56:00
Roxy
56:01
about
56:01
this
56:02
journey,
56:02
except
56:02
for
56:03
me.
56:03
That
56:04
is
56:04
right.
56:04
That's
56:04
absolutely
56:05
right.
56:05
And
56:05
I
56:05
love
56:05
how
56:05
you're
56:06
living
56:06
holistically.
56:07
You
56:07
know,
56:07
everybody.
56:09
Every
56:09
moment
56:09
brought
56:10
you
56:10
to
56:10
where
56:10
you
56:10
are
56:11
today.
56:11
And
56:13
it's
56:13
incredible
56:13
to
56:13
think
56:14
about,
56:14
you.
56:14
Know,
56:15
And
56:15
I
56:15
think
56:15
everyone.
56:16
If
56:16
we
56:16
looked
56:16
out
56:16
the
56:17
window
56:17
here,
56:18
by
56:19
the
56:19
way,
56:19
your
56:19
office
56:19
is
56:20
so
56:20
cool.
56:20
Oh,
56:20
thank
56:21
you.
56:21
If
56:21
we
56:21
looked
56:22
out
56:22
the
56:22
window
56:22
and
56:23
saw
56:23
one
56:23
person
56:25
moving
56:25
around
56:26
you,
56:26
and
56:26
I
56:26
could
56:26
walk
56:27
out
56:27
there
56:27
and
56:28
say,
56:28
can
56:28
we
56:28
talk
56:28
to
56:28
you
56:29
for
56:29
a
56:29
minute?
56:29
We
56:30
would
56:30
find.
56:31
I
56:31
would
56:32
bet
56:32
my
56:32
eye
56:32
teeth.
56:33
We
56:33
would
56:33
find
56:34
that
56:36
they
56:36
are
56:37
exactly
56:37
that.
56:38
No
56:38
one
56:38
else
56:38
could
56:39
be
56:39
where
56:39
they
56:40
are
56:40
in
56:40
this
56:40
moment,
56:41
at
56:41
this
56:41
time.
56:42
We
56:42
are
56:42
all
56:42
a
56:43
sum
56:43
of
56:44
our
56:44
parts.
56:45
And
56:46
what's
56:46
cool
56:47
about
56:47
what
56:47
you're
56:47
doing
56:48
and
56:48
what
56:48
I
56:48
get
56:48
to
56:49
do
56:49
in
56:49
the
56:49
world
56:49
is
56:50
we
56:50
get
56:50
to
56:50
help
56:51
other
56:51
people
56:51
kind
56:52
of
56:52
not
56:52
just
56:52
tell
56:53
their
56:53
story,
56:53
but
56:53
see
56:54
their
56:54
story.
56:55
I
56:56
can't
56:56
tell
56:56
you
56:56
how
56:56
many
56:57
times
56:57
people
56:57
come
56:57
up
56:58
to
56:58
me
56:58
and
56:58
they're
56:58
like,
56:58
well,
56:59
you
56:59
know,
56:59
I
57:00
came
57:00
out
57:00
when
57:00
I
57:00
was
57:00
20,
57:00
but
57:01
it
57:01
was,
57:01
you
57:01
know,
57:01
years
57:02
was
57:02
much
57:02
harder.
57:02
Years
57:03
was.
57:03
Was
57:03
different.
57:03
Or
57:04
I
57:04
did.
57:04
I
57:04
got
57:05
divorced
57:05
when
57:05
I
57:05
was
57:06
40,
57:07
you
57:07
know,
57:08
after.
57:09
I
57:09
know
57:09
it's
57:09
not
57:09
a
57:10
big
57:10
story.
57:10
I'm
57:10
like,
57:10
no,
57:10
no,
57:11
no,
57:11
no,
57:11
no.
57:11
Think
57:12
about
57:12
this.
57:14
You.
57:14
Your
57:14
story
57:15
is
57:15
super
57:15
unique,
57:16
and
57:16
only
57:17
one
57:17
person
57:18
can
57:18
be
57:18
in
57:18
this
57:19
space.
57:19
And
57:19
everything
57:20
you
57:20
did
57:20
led
57:21
you
57:21
up
57:21
to
57:21
that
57:21
moment
57:22
of
57:22
saying,
57:22
hey,
57:23
I'm
57:23
going
57:23
to
57:23
advocate
57:23
for
57:24
myself
57:24
or
57:25
I'm
57:25
going
57:25
to
57:26
advocate
57:26
for
57:26
a
57:26
community
57:27
that
57:28
needs
57:29
advocating
57:30
for.
57:32
Everybody's
57:32
got
57:33
a
57:33
book
57:33
in
57:33
them.
57:33
Everybody.
57:35
Everybody
57:35
has
57:36
a
57:36
unique
57:36
story.
57:36
And
57:36
I
57:37
think,
57:37
like,
57:37
you're
57:37
saying
57:38
true
57:38
happiness,
57:39
at
57:39
least
57:39
for
57:40
me,
57:40
is
57:40
being
57:41
in
57:41
service
57:41
to
57:42
others,
57:42
you
57:42
know,
57:42
and
57:42
really
57:43
trying
57:43
to.
57:43
What
57:43
else
57:43
is
57:44
there?
57:44
Right?
57:44
What
57:45
else
57:45
is
57:45
there?
57:45
You
57:45
can't
57:45
do
57:46
it
57:46
all
57:46
for
57:46
yourself.
57:47
You
57:47
know,
57:48
you
57:48
gotta
57:48
be
57:49
out
57:49
there
57:49
to
57:49
help
57:49
people.
57:50
You
57:50
know,
57:51
you
57:51
use
57:51
the
57:51
word
57:51
happiness.
57:52
True
57:53
happiness,
57:53
right?
57:54
What
57:54
is
57:54
true
57:54
happiness?
57:55
What
57:55
is
57:55
that?
57:57
When
57:57
I
57:58
think
57:58
about
57:58
my
57:58
aunt
57:58
Char,
57:59
her
57:59
son,
57:59
my
58:00
cousin
58:00
David,
58:00
he
58:01
died
58:01
when
58:01
he
58:01
was
58:01
13,
58:02
very
58:03
suddenly,
58:03
complications
58:04
from
58:04
diabetes.
58:05
And
58:06
I
58:06
was
58:06
9
58:06
at
58:07
the
58:07
time.
58:08
He
58:08
was
58:08
13,
58:08
one
58:09
year
58:09
older
58:09
than
58:09
my
58:09
boys
58:10
are
58:10
right
58:10
now.
58:10
And
58:10
my
58:11
aunt,
58:12
who
58:12
had
58:12
another
58:13
child,
58:14
David's
58:15
little
58:15
sister,
58:16
my
58:16
cousin
58:16
Carrie.
58:20
As
58:20
I've
58:20
gotten
58:20
older,
58:21
I've
58:21
always
58:21
wondered,
58:22
how
58:22
did
58:22
she
58:22
do
58:23
it?
58:24
How
58:24
did
58:24
she
58:25
keep
58:25
going?
58:26
And
58:26
not
58:27
just
58:27
keep
58:27
going,
58:27
but
58:28
thriving
58:29
and,
58:30
you
58:30
know,
58:30
bought
58:30
a
58:30
plane
58:31
and
58:31
started
58:31
flying
58:32
a
58:32
plane.
58:32
Like,
58:32
this
58:32
is
58:32
a
58:33
remarkable
58:34
woman,
58:34
and
58:35
she's
58:35
my
58:36
mentor
58:36
when
58:36
it
58:36
comes
58:36
to
58:37
rental
58:37
properties.
58:37
And,
58:38
like,
58:38
she's
58:39
lived
58:39
this
58:39
incredible,
58:41
joyful
58:42
life.
58:43
And
58:43
I've.
58:43
In
58:43
my
58:43
adult
58:44
life,
58:44
I've
58:44
asked
58:44
her,
58:45
how
58:45
did
58:45
you
58:45
do
58:45
that?
58:46
And
58:46
she
58:47
said,
58:47
one
58:48
day
58:48
at
58:49
a
58:49
time.
58:50
And
58:50
one
58:50
day
58:51
at
58:51
a
58:51
time,
58:52
she
58:52
said,
58:52
yes,
58:53
there
58:53
were
58:53
times
58:53
that
58:53
I
58:54
was
58:55
obviously
58:55
devastated
58:56
and
58:56
there
58:56
were
58:56
times
58:56
like
58:56
I
58:57
lost
58:57
my
58:57
son.
58:59
But
58:59
she
59:00
said
59:00
I
59:00
was
59:01
able
59:01
to
59:01
kind
59:01
of
59:02
respond
59:02
to
59:02
myself
59:03
in
59:04
the
59:04
moment.
59:05
I
59:05
have
59:05
a
59:06
daughter,
59:06
I
59:07
have
59:07
my
59:07
nieces
59:07
and
59:07
my
59:08
nephews.
59:08
I
59:08
have
59:08
a
59:09
mission.
59:09
I
59:09
have
59:09
a
59:09
purpose.
59:10
And
59:10
while
59:11
I'm
59:11
here,
59:12
I
59:12
just.
59:13
What
59:13
else
59:13
am
59:13
I
59:13
going
59:13
to
59:14
do?
59:14
I
59:14
can't
59:14
just
59:14
shrink.
59:16
And
59:17
that
59:17
just.
59:18
I
59:18
loved
59:18
how
59:19
she
59:19
put
59:19
it,
59:20
that
59:20
she
59:20
responded
59:21
to
59:21
herself.
59:22
And
59:22
we
59:23
should
59:23
be
59:23
in
59:23
continual
59:24
dialogue
59:24
with
59:25
ourselves.
59:25
And
59:26
yeah,
59:26
I
59:26
have
59:26
bad
59:27
days
59:28
and
59:29
could
59:30
I
59:30
wallow
59:30
around
59:30
in
59:31
some
59:31
self
59:31
pity?
59:32
Yeah.
59:33
And
59:33
I
59:33
have
59:33
before.
59:34
But
59:34
I
59:34
respond
59:35
to
59:35
myself.
59:36
I
59:36
have
59:36
conversations
59:37
with
59:37
myself.
59:38
And
59:39
that
59:39
is
59:39
the
59:39
only
59:39
thing
59:40
that
59:40
we
59:40
can
59:40
do
59:41
is
59:42
respond.
59:44
And
59:44
I
59:44
actually
59:44
say
59:45
out
59:45
loud,
59:45
okay,
59:45
get
59:45
up,
59:46
get
59:47
up.
59:48
Yeah,
59:49
because.
59:51
And
59:51
the
59:51
most
59:52
gratifying
59:52
things
59:52
about
59:53
life
59:54
are
59:54
being
59:55
in
59:55
service
59:55
to
59:56
others.
59:57
I
59:57
have
59:58
spent
59:58
a
59:58
good
59:58
deal
59:58
of
59:59
my
59:59
life
59:59
serving
1:00:00
like
1:00:00
my
1:00:00
dream.
1:00:01
And
1:00:01
I
1:00:01
want
1:00:01
to
1:00:02
go
1:00:02
be
1:00:02
on
1:00:02
the
1:00:02
Grand
1:00:02
Ole
1:00:03
Opry.
1:00:03
I
1:00:03
want
1:00:03
to
1:00:03
be
1:00:03
on
1:00:03
the
1:00:04
radio.
1:00:05
And
1:00:05
there
1:00:06
has
1:00:06
to
1:00:06
be
1:00:06
a
1:00:06
focus
1:00:07
and
1:00:07
somewhat
1:00:08
kind
1:00:08
of
1:00:08
a
1:00:08
narcissism.
1:00:10
This
1:00:10
is
1:00:10
the
1:00:10
only
1:00:10
thing
1:00:11
that
1:00:11
matters.
1:00:11
You
1:00:11
can't
1:00:12
make
1:00:12
it
1:00:12
in
1:00:12
the
1:00:12
arts
1:00:12
or
1:00:13
entertainment
1:00:13
or
1:00:14
broadcast
1:00:15
if
1:00:15
you're
1:00:15
not
1:00:16
singularly
1:00:17
focused
1:00:18
most
1:00:18
of
1:00:18
the
1:00:18
time.
1:00:19
But
1:00:19
I've
1:00:20
served
1:00:20
myself
1:00:21
enough.
1:00:22
I
1:00:22
can
1:00:22
do
1:00:23
for
1:00:23
others.
1:00:23
And
1:00:24
it
1:00:24
actually
1:00:24
feels
1:00:25
better
1:00:25
than
1:00:26
anything
1:00:26
else.
1:00:27
It
1:00:27
really
1:00:27
does.
1:00:27
And
1:00:27
once
1:00:27
you
1:00:28
hit
1:00:28
those
1:00:28
goals
1:00:28
like
1:00:28
you're
1:00:29
saying
1:00:29
that
1:00:29
you
1:00:29
set
1:00:29
for
1:00:29
yourself,
1:00:30
then
1:00:30
it's
1:00:30
like,
1:00:30
okay,
1:00:31
that
1:00:31
kind
1:00:32
of
1:00:32
wears
1:00:32
off.
1:00:32
Then
1:00:32
it's
1:00:32
on
1:00:33
to
1:00:33
the
1:00:33
next.
1:00:34
And
1:00:34
you're
1:00:34
constantly
1:00:35
moving
1:00:35
forward.
1:00:36
Like
1:00:36
you're
1:00:36
saying,
1:00:37
how
1:00:38
are
1:00:38
you
1:00:38
living
1:00:39
iconically
1:00:39
right
1:00:40
now?
1:00:43
Such
1:00:43
a
1:00:43
great
1:00:44
question.
1:00:45
I
1:00:46
am
1:00:46
living
1:00:47
iconically
1:00:48
in
1:00:50
letting
1:00:50
go
1:00:50
and
1:00:51
releasing
1:00:53
expectations
1:00:55
that
1:00:55
the
1:00:56
world
1:00:56
has
1:00:56
of
1:00:58
a
1:00:58
woman,
1:01:01
a
1:01:01
queer
1:01:01
woman
1:01:04
in
1:01:04
her
1:01:05
mid-50s.
1:01:07
Example.
1:01:09
I
1:01:09
began
1:01:09
having
1:01:10
hot
1:01:10
flashes
1:01:11
a
1:01:11
couple
1:01:11
of
1:01:12
years
1:01:12
ago.
1:01:13
So,
1:01:14
I
1:01:14
mean,
1:01:15
full
1:01:15
on
1:01:15
menopause
1:01:17
and
1:01:17
because
1:01:18
in
1:01:18
my
1:01:18
last
1:01:18
role
1:01:19
and
1:01:19
in
1:01:19
my
1:01:19
current
1:01:19
role,
1:01:20
like
1:01:21
how
1:01:21
I
1:01:21
show
1:01:21
up
1:01:21
at
1:01:22
work
1:01:22
and
1:01:22
I
1:01:22
have
1:01:23
a
1:01:23
lot
1:01:23
of
1:01:23
power,
1:01:24
right.
1:01:24
I
1:01:24
have
1:01:24
a
1:01:24
lot
1:01:25
of
1:01:25
position,
1:01:26
I
1:01:26
have
1:01:26
a
1:01:26
lot
1:01:26
of
1:01:27
influence
1:01:27
in
1:01:27
the
1:01:28
companies
1:01:28
where
1:01:29
in
1:01:29
the
1:01:29
company.
1:01:30
I
1:01:30
last
1:01:30
worked
1:01:30
out
1:01:31
in
1:01:31
this
1:01:31
one
1:01:32
and
1:01:33
I
1:01:33
made
1:01:33
a
1:01:33
decision
1:01:34
that
1:01:34
when
1:01:34
I
1:01:34
have
1:01:34
a
1:01:35
hot
1:01:35
flash,
1:01:36
I'm
1:01:36
going
1:01:36
to
1:01:37
say
1:01:37
it
1:01:37
out
1:01:37
loud.
1:01:38
So
1:01:38
I
1:01:38
would
1:01:39
be
1:01:39
in
1:01:39
meetings,
1:01:39
whether
1:01:39
it
1:01:40
be
1:01:40
with
1:01:40
clients
1:01:40
or
1:01:41
my
1:01:41
team,
1:01:41
and
1:01:42
you
1:01:42
can
1:01:42
feel
1:01:42
it,
1:01:42
you
1:01:43
can
1:01:43
see
1:01:43
it
1:01:43
right
1:01:43
there.
1:01:43
It
1:01:43
bubbles
1:01:44
up.
1:01:44
You
1:01:45
actually
1:01:45
emanate
1:01:46
heat.
1:01:46
So
1:01:47
what
1:01:47
I
1:01:47
would
1:01:47
do
1:01:47
is
1:01:49
say,
1:01:50
take
1:01:50
my
1:01:51
jacket
1:01:51
off.
1:01:51
And
1:01:51
I
1:01:51
would
1:01:52
say,
1:01:52
you
1:01:52
might
1:01:53
notice
1:01:53
that
1:01:54
I'm
1:01:54
red
1:01:54
right
1:01:55
now.
1:01:56
And
1:01:56
you
1:01:57
might
1:01:57
notice
1:01:57
that
1:01:57
My
1:01:58
neck
1:01:58
is
1:01:58
a
1:01:58
little
1:01:58
blotchy.
1:01:59
I'm
1:02:00
okay,
1:02:01
I'm
1:02:01
having
1:02:01
a
1:02:01
hot
1:02:02
flash.
1:02:02
And
1:02:02
in
1:02:02
about
1:02:03
90
1:02:03
seconds
1:02:03
I'm
1:02:04
gonna
1:02:04
be
1:02:04
freezing
1:02:04
cold.
1:02:06
And
1:02:07
I
1:02:08
love
1:02:09
the
1:02:09
reaction
1:02:10
that
1:02:10
I
1:02:11
don't
1:02:11
do
1:02:11
it
1:02:11
for
1:02:11
shock
1:02:11
value.
1:02:12
I
1:02:12
do
1:02:12
it
1:02:12
because
1:02:13
that's
1:02:13
a
1:02:13
decision
1:02:14
I've
1:02:14
made.
1:02:15
And
1:02:15
it's
1:02:15
usually,
1:02:16
I'm
1:02:16
usually
1:02:16
in
1:02:16
meetings
1:02:17
with
1:02:17
men,
1:02:17
you
1:02:18
know,
1:02:18
sometimes
1:02:18
women,
1:02:19
but
1:02:19
almost
1:02:20
always
1:02:20
men.
1:02:21
And
1:02:22
almost
1:02:22
every
1:02:23
time
1:02:24
men
1:02:24
will
1:02:25
say,
1:02:25
oh,
1:02:25
my
1:02:26
wife
1:02:26
isn't
1:02:27
that,
1:02:27
or
1:02:28
oh,
1:02:28
my
1:02:29
sister
1:02:29
or
1:02:29
my
1:02:29
mom
1:02:30
that
1:02:31
my
1:02:31
mom's
1:02:31
in
1:02:31
that
1:02:31
right
1:02:32
now.
1:02:33
And
1:02:33
it
1:02:34
almost
1:02:35
always
1:02:35
sparks
1:02:36
like
1:02:36
a
1:02:36
two
1:02:37
minute
1:02:37
dialogue
1:02:38
about,
1:02:39
you
1:02:39
know,
1:02:39
what's
1:02:39
that
1:02:39
like?
1:02:40
And
1:02:40
I'm
1:02:40
like,
1:02:40
oh,
1:02:40
it's
1:02:41
fine.
1:02:41
It
1:02:41
just
1:02:41
happens
1:02:42
like
1:02:42
twice
1:02:42
a
1:02:42
day.
1:02:42
I
1:02:43
have
1:02:43
a
1:02:43
hot
1:02:43
flash
1:02:43
and
1:02:43
again,
1:02:44
I'm
1:02:44
going
1:02:44
to
1:02:44
be
1:02:44
freezing
1:02:45
in
1:02:45
two
1:02:45
minutes.
1:02:46
And
1:02:47
I
1:02:47
like
1:02:48
that
1:02:48
feels
1:02:49
iconic
1:02:50
to
1:02:50
me
1:02:51
to
1:02:51
own
1:02:51
that.
1:02:52
And
1:02:52
because
1:02:53
I
1:02:53
have
1:02:53
the
1:02:53
power,
1:02:54
position
1:02:54
and
1:02:55
resource
1:02:56
and
1:02:56
safety
1:02:57
to
1:02:57
say
1:02:57
it,
1:02:58
I
1:02:58
say
1:02:58
it.
1:02:59
That's
1:03:00
amazing.
1:03:00
It's
1:03:00
also
1:03:00
creating
1:03:01
a
1:03:01
bridge
1:03:02
that
1:03:02
you
1:03:03
didn't
1:03:03
know
1:03:03
existed
1:03:03
before
1:03:04
with
1:03:04
that
1:03:04
other
1:03:04
person.
1:03:05
You
1:03:05
know,
1:03:05
nobody
1:03:06
doesn't
1:03:06
know
1:03:07
someone
1:03:07
going
1:03:07
through
1:03:07
menopause,
1:03:08
right?
1:03:09
And
1:03:10
if
1:03:10
I
1:03:10
can
1:03:10
just
1:03:10
own
1:03:11
it
1:03:11
and
1:03:11
say
1:03:11
it.
1:03:11
And
1:03:12
the
1:03:12
same
1:03:12
thing
1:03:12
happens
1:03:13
with,
1:03:13
you
1:03:13
know,
1:03:13
being
1:03:14
a
1:03:14
queer
1:03:14
person.
1:03:15
I'll
1:03:15
have
1:03:15
people,
1:03:15
you
1:03:16
know,
1:03:16
I'll,
1:03:17
you
1:03:17
know,
1:03:17
talk
1:03:18
about
1:03:18
my,
1:03:18
my
1:03:18
wife
1:03:19
or
1:03:19
my
1:03:19
kids
1:03:19
at
1:03:20
work.
1:03:20
And
1:03:20
sometimes
1:03:20
you're
1:03:21
like,
1:03:21
you
1:03:21
can
1:03:21
see
1:03:21
people,
1:03:22
but
1:03:22
then
1:03:23
they'll
1:03:24
kind
1:03:24
of
1:03:24
pull
1:03:24
me
1:03:24
aside.
1:03:25
You
1:03:26
can
1:03:26
see
1:03:26
they're
1:03:26
visible.
1:03:27
Like,
1:03:27
wow,
1:03:27
she
1:03:28
just
1:03:28
said
1:03:28
that
1:03:28
out
1:03:28
loud
1:03:29
in
1:03:29
a
1:03:29
meeting
1:03:29
or
1:03:30
in
1:03:30
a
1:03:30
presentation.
1:03:32
And
1:03:33
people
1:03:33
usually
1:03:34
follow
1:03:34
up
1:03:35
at
1:03:35
some
1:03:35
point.
1:03:35
It
1:03:35
might
1:03:36
be
1:03:36
a
1:03:36
year,
1:03:36
it
1:03:36
might
1:03:36
be,
1:03:37
you
1:03:37
know,
1:03:37
an
1:03:37
hour
1:03:38
after,
1:03:38
they'll
1:03:39
be
1:03:39
like,
1:03:39
you
1:03:39
know,
1:03:39
thank
1:03:40
you
1:03:40
for
1:03:40
sharing
1:03:40
that.
1:03:40
I've
1:03:41
got,
1:03:41
I've
1:03:41
got
1:03:41
a
1:03:41
trans
1:03:42
daughter
1:03:43
or
1:03:43
I've
1:03:44
got,
1:03:44
you
1:03:44
know,
1:03:45
like
1:03:45
a
1:03:45
couple
1:03:45
of
1:03:46
real
1:03:46
dudes
1:03:46
at
1:03:47
work.
1:03:47
Like
1:03:47
one
1:03:47
of
1:03:47
them
1:03:48
said,
1:03:49
my
1:03:49
son
1:03:49
came
1:03:49
out
1:03:49
to
1:03:50
me
1:03:50
a
1:03:50
couple
1:03:50
of
1:03:50
years
1:03:50
ago
1:03:51
and
1:03:52
I
1:03:52
just.
1:03:52
Thank
1:03:52
you
1:03:52
for,
1:03:53
I
1:03:54
want
1:03:54
to
1:03:54
use
1:03:54
the
1:03:55
word
1:03:55
normalizing,
1:03:55
but
1:03:56
we
1:03:56
are
1:03:56
normal.
1:03:57
And,
1:03:57
but
1:03:58
thank
1:03:58
you
1:03:58
for
1:03:58
making
1:03:59
it
1:03:59
more
1:04:00
talked
1:04:00
about.
1:04:01
And
1:04:01
I
1:04:01
think
1:04:02
that's,
1:04:03
I
1:04:03
think
1:04:03
that's
1:04:03
living
1:04:04
iconically.
1:04:05
That
1:04:05
is,
1:04:06
that's
1:04:06
absolutely
1:04:06
living
1:04:07
iconically.
1:04:08
What
1:04:08
advice
1:04:08
would
1:04:08
you
1:04:09
give
1:04:09
your
1:04:09
2
1:04:09
year,
1:04:10
25
1:04:10
year
1:04:10
olds?
1:04:12
Enjoy
1:04:13
your
1:04:14
success.
1:04:15
Having
1:04:15
grown
1:04:16
up
1:04:16
poor,
1:04:17
I,
1:04:17
you
1:04:18
know,
1:04:18
I
1:04:18
didn't,
1:04:19
I
1:04:19
was
1:04:19
so
1:04:19
careful
1:04:20
with
1:04:20
money,
1:04:20
like
1:04:21
overly
1:04:21
careful
1:04:22
with
1:04:22
money.
1:04:23
And
1:04:24
even
1:04:24
my,
1:04:25
my
1:04:25
business
1:04:25
manager
1:04:26
at
1:04:26
one
1:04:26
point
1:04:26
after
1:04:27
September
1:04:27
11th,
1:04:27
so
1:04:28
I
1:04:28
would
1:04:28
have
1:04:28
been
1:04:28
31,
1:04:30
he
1:04:30
called
1:04:31
me
1:04:31
into
1:04:31
his
1:04:31
office,
1:04:31
he
1:04:32
said,
1:04:32
I
1:04:32
want
1:04:32
you
1:04:32
to,
1:04:33
you
1:04:34
take
1:04:34
A
1:04:34
vacation.
1:04:34
I
1:04:34
was
1:04:35
like,
1:04:35
what
1:04:35
do
1:04:35
you
1:04:35
mean?
1:04:35
And
1:04:35
he
1:04:36
was
1:04:36
like,
1:04:37
spend
1:04:37
some
1:04:37
of
1:04:37
your
1:04:37
money.
1:04:37
You
1:04:38
don't
1:04:38
spend
1:04:38
any
1:04:38
of
1:04:38
your
1:04:39
money.
1:04:39
I've
1:04:39
seen
1:04:40
this
1:04:40
before.
1:04:40
You're
1:04:41
going
1:04:41
to
1:04:41
burn
1:04:41
out.
1:04:41
Enjoy
1:04:42
your
1:04:42
success.
1:04:43
And
1:04:44
I
1:04:44
was
1:04:44
like,
1:04:44
what
1:04:44
do
1:04:44
you
1:04:44
mean?
1:04:45
I
1:04:45
don't
1:04:45
spend
1:04:45
my
1:04:45
money.
1:04:45
I
1:04:46
just
1:04:46
bought
1:04:47
a
1:04:47
rental
1:04:47
house,
1:04:48
another
1:04:48
rental
1:04:49
last
1:04:49
week.
1:04:49
And
1:04:49
he
1:04:49
was
1:04:50
like,
1:04:50
that
1:04:50
doesn't
1:04:50
count.
1:04:51
He
1:04:51
said,
1:04:51
go
1:04:51
on
1:04:52
a
1:04:52
vacation.
1:04:52
I
1:04:52
said,
1:04:53
well,
1:04:53
I
1:04:53
was
1:04:53
just
1:04:53
in
1:04:53
Europe.
1:04:54
And
1:04:54
he
1:04:54
said,
1:04:55
no,
1:04:55
you
1:04:55
tacked
1:04:55
that
1:04:56
onto
1:04:56
a
1:04:56
tour.
1:04:57
I'm
1:04:57
telling
1:04:58
you,
1:04:59
enjoy.
1:05:00
Enjoy
1:05:01
yourself.
1:05:02
Do
1:05:03
something
1:05:03
for
1:05:03
yourself.
1:05:05
So
1:05:05
that
1:05:05
would
1:05:05
be
1:05:06
my
1:05:06
advice,
1:05:06
is
1:05:07
like,
1:05:07
have
1:05:08
a
1:05:08
little
1:05:08
more
1:05:08
fun.
1:05:09
I
1:05:09
didn't
1:05:09
have
1:05:09
enough
1:05:10
fun.
1:05:11
And
1:05:12
what
1:05:12
does
1:05:12
self
1:05:12
care
1:05:12
look
1:05:13
like
1:05:13
for
1:05:13
you
1:05:13
today?
1:05:15
Self
1:05:15
care
1:05:15
for
1:05:16
me
1:05:16
is
1:05:19
finding
1:05:19
a
1:05:19
day
1:05:20
where
1:05:20
I
1:05:20
don't
1:05:20
have
1:05:20
to
1:05:21
speak
1:05:21
to,
1:05:21
you
1:05:21
know,
1:05:22
tapping
1:05:22
out
1:05:23
completely.
1:05:23
You
1:05:24
know,
1:05:24
if
1:05:24
my
1:05:24
wife
1:05:24
lets
1:05:25
me
1:05:25
go
1:05:25
upstate
1:05:26
or
1:05:26
I
1:05:26
let
1:05:26
her,
1:05:26
we
1:05:26
try
1:05:26
to
1:05:27
switch
1:05:27
off
1:05:27
and
1:05:28
got
1:05:28
a
1:05:28
place
1:05:28
in
1:05:28
the
1:05:28
Hudson
1:05:29
Valley.
1:05:30
It's
1:05:30
important
1:05:30
that
1:05:31
I
1:05:31
push
1:05:32
her
1:05:32
to
1:05:32
tap
1:05:32
out.
1:05:33
Go
1:05:34
get
1:05:34
on
1:05:34
the
1:05:34
train,
1:05:34
drive
1:05:35
up
1:05:35
there,
1:05:35
be
1:05:35
gone.
1:05:36
As
1:05:37
a
1:05:37
parent,
1:05:37
as
1:05:37
a
1:05:38
wife,
1:05:38
as
1:05:38
a
1:05:38
worker,
1:05:39
go
1:05:39
tap
1:05:39
out.
1:05:40
And
1:05:40
for
1:05:40
me,
1:05:41
when
1:05:41
I
1:05:41
get
1:05:41
to
1:05:41
tap
1:05:42
out
1:05:42
for
1:05:42
a
1:05:42
day
1:05:43
or
1:05:43
two,
1:05:44
it
1:05:44
includes
1:05:44
my
1:05:45
not
1:05:45
even
1:05:46
opening
1:05:46
my
1:05:47
mouth
1:05:47
or
1:05:47
speaking
1:05:47
to
1:05:48
anyone.
1:05:48
I'm
1:05:49
not
1:05:49
very
1:05:49
social.
1:05:51
I
1:05:52
don't
1:05:52
want
1:05:52
to
1:05:52
go
1:05:52
like,
1:05:53
let's
1:05:53
go
1:05:53
have
1:05:53
dinner
1:05:54
with.
1:05:55
Tapping
1:05:55
out
1:05:55
is
1:05:56
putting
1:05:56
on
1:05:57
my
1:05:57
hocus
1:05:58
and
1:05:58
walking
1:06:00
15
1:06:01
miles
1:06:02
and
1:06:02
in
1:06:03
silence
1:06:03
or
1:06:03
a
1:06:04
podcast
1:06:04
or
1:06:05
music,
1:06:06
but.
1:06:06
Or
1:06:06
fixing
1:06:07
something
1:06:07
in
1:06:07
the
1:06:07
house,
1:06:08
tinkering
1:06:08
with
1:06:09
something,
1:06:09
but
1:06:10
actually
1:06:10
not
1:06:10
speaking
1:06:11
to
1:06:11
another
1:06:11
human
1:06:12
being.
1:06:12
And
1:06:13
then.
1:06:13
And
1:06:13
also
1:06:14
watching
1:06:14
a
1:06:14
documentary
1:06:15
of
1:06:15
documentaries.
1:06:16
See,
1:06:16
there
1:06:16
is
1:06:16
something
1:06:17
so
1:06:17
nice
1:06:17
about
1:06:17
that.
1:06:18
Recharging
1:06:18
and
1:06:19
just
1:06:19
being
1:06:19
quiet.
1:06:20
You
1:06:20
know,
1:06:21
I
1:06:21
am.
1:06:22
I
1:06:22
think
1:06:22
it's
1:06:22
called
1:06:22
an
1:06:22
ambivert.
1:06:23
Yes,
1:06:24
Yes.
1:06:24
I
1:06:24
can
1:06:25
very.
1:06:25
You
1:06:25
can
1:06:26
put
1:06:26
me
1:06:26
in
1:06:26
a
1:06:26
room
1:06:26
with
1:06:26
a
1:06:27
thousand
1:06:27
people
1:06:27
or
1:06:27
10
1:06:28
people.
1:06:28
I
1:06:28
am
1:06:29
very
1:06:29
interested
1:06:29
in
1:06:30
people.
1:06:30
If
1:06:31
I
1:06:31
go
1:06:31
to
1:06:31
a
1:06:31
drugstore,
1:06:32
a
1:06:32
Duane
1:06:33
cvs,
1:06:33
Duane
1:06:34
read,
1:06:34
I
1:06:34
will
1:06:35
go
1:06:35
in
1:06:35
and
1:06:35
have
1:06:35
a
1:06:36
con.
1:06:36
Like,
1:06:36
I
1:06:36
do
1:06:37
like
1:06:37
people.
1:06:37
It's
1:06:38
not
1:06:38
that
1:06:38
I'm
1:06:38
antisocial.
1:06:39
I
1:06:40
like
1:06:40
people.
1:06:40
I'm
1:06:41
interested
1:06:41
in
1:06:42
people.
1:06:42
But
1:06:43
I
1:06:43
also
1:06:43
need
1:06:44
that.
1:06:44
That
1:06:44
counterbalance
1:06:45
of
1:06:46
complete,
1:06:46
like
1:06:46
silence
1:06:47
and
1:06:48
isolation.
1:06:49
I
1:06:49
need
1:06:49
my
1:06:49
battery
1:06:50
filled.
1:06:52
And
1:06:52
I,
1:06:53
I'm
1:06:53
not
1:06:53
a
1:06:53
social
1:06:54
person.
1:06:55
I.
1:06:55
My.
1:06:56
I
1:06:56
tend
1:06:56
to.
1:06:56
I
1:06:57
would
1:06:57
love.
1:06:58
I
1:06:58
think
1:06:59
I
1:06:59
fantasize
1:06:59
about
1:07:00
a
1:07:00
year
1:07:00
off
1:07:01
and,
1:07:02
and
1:07:02
reading
1:07:03
books
1:07:03
and
1:07:03
watching
1:07:04
documentaries
1:07:04
and
1:07:05
walking.
1:07:05
Walking.
1:07:06
I
1:07:07
love,
1:07:07
I
1:07:07
love
1:07:07
that.
1:07:08
So
1:07:08
that's
1:07:08
my
1:07:09
self
1:07:09
care.
1:07:10
And
1:07:10
your
1:07:11
last
1:07:11
studio
1:07:11
album
1:07:12
was
1:07:12
in
1:07:12
2016.
1:07:13
Will
1:07:13
we
1:07:13
be
1:07:13
hearing
1:07:14
any
1:07:14
new
1:07:15
music
1:07:15
coming
1:07:16
up?
1:07:16
I
1:07:16
don't
1:07:16
know
1:07:16
when,
1:07:17
but
1:07:17
absolutely,
1:07:18
I
1:07:18
will
1:07:18
always.
1:07:20
Yeah.
1:07:20
I'm
1:07:21
not
1:07:21
through
1:07:21
with
1:07:21
music.
1:07:21
Music's
1:07:22
not
1:07:22
through
1:07:22
with
1:07:23
me.
1:07:23
And
1:07:23
I'm
1:07:23
working
1:07:24
on
1:07:24
a
1:07:24
musical
1:07:25
right
1:07:25
now.
1:07:26
Gene
1:07:26
Smart
1:07:26
bought
1:07:27
the
1:07:27
life
1:07:27
rights
1:07:27
of
1:07:28
my.
1:07:29
Gene
1:07:30
Smart
1:07:30
acquired
1:07:30
the
1:07:31
life
1:07:31
rights
1:07:32
of
1:07:32
my
1:07:32
book.
1:07:33
Like
1:07:33
me,
1:07:33
my
1:07:34
memoir.
1:07:34
And
1:07:34
we're
1:07:35
working
1:07:35
on
1:07:35
a
1:07:35
Broadway
1:07:36
musical.
1:07:36
Oh,
1:07:36
that's
1:07:37
wonderful.
1:07:37
When
1:07:37
will
1:07:37
it
1:07:37
launch?
1:07:38
We
1:07:38
don't
1:07:38
know.
1:07:38
Okay.
1:07:39
We
1:07:39
don't.
1:07:39
We're.
1:07:40
We've
1:07:40
just.
1:07:41
People
1:07:42
are
1:07:42
coming
1:07:42
onto
1:07:43
the
1:07:43
project.
1:07:43
So
1:07:43
the
1:07:43
book
1:07:44
writer
1:07:44
and
1:07:44
the.
1:07:46
I'll
1:07:46
be
1:07:46
co
1:07:46
writing
1:07:47
music
1:07:47
for
1:07:47
it.
1:07:48
So
1:07:48
the
1:07:48
team
1:07:49
is
1:07:50
coming
1:07:50
together
1:07:51
and
1:07:51
these
1:07:51
things
1:07:52
take
1:07:52
a
1:07:52
long
1:07:52
time.
1:07:52
So
1:07:53
I
1:07:53
don't
1:07:53
know
1:07:53
when
1:07:53
that
1:07:53
will
1:07:53
be,
1:07:54
but
1:07:54
we're
1:07:54
headed
1:07:55
in
1:07:55
that
1:07:55
direction
1:07:56
and
1:07:57
I
1:07:58
know
1:07:58
I'll
1:07:58
make
1:07:58
another
1:07:58
record.
1:07:59
I
1:07:59
just,
1:07:59
I
1:07:59
don't
1:08:00
know
1:08:00
when.
1:08:00
And
1:08:00
I
1:08:00
often.
1:08:01
That
1:08:01
tracks
1:08:01
with
1:08:01
my
1:08:02
whole
1:08:02
career.
1:08:03
I
1:08:03
never
1:08:04
know
1:08:04
when
1:08:04
I
1:08:05
know
1:08:05
it.
1:08:05
When
1:08:05
I
1:08:05
In
1:08:06
my
1:08:06
belly,
1:08:06
I'm
1:08:06
like,
1:08:06
oh,
1:08:07
it's
1:08:07
time
1:08:07
to
1:08:08
start
1:08:08
pulling
1:08:09
out
1:08:09
the
1:08:09
songs
1:08:09
and
1:08:10
hit
1:08:10
the
1:08:10
studio.
1:08:11
And
1:08:11
that's
1:08:12
a
1:08:12
great
1:08:12
partner
1:08:12
to
1:08:12
have.
1:08:12
Jean
1:08:13
Smart,
1:08:13
wow.
1:08:13
Amazing.
1:08:14
She's
1:08:15
amazing
1:08:15
and
1:08:15
lovely
1:08:16
and
1:08:17
her
1:08:17
show,
1:08:18
all
1:08:18
of
1:08:18
what
1:08:18
she
1:08:18
does
1:08:19
is
1:08:19
so
1:08:19
good
1:08:19
and
1:08:20
so
1:08:20
funny.
1:08:21
Hacks,
1:08:22
of
1:08:22
course,
1:08:22
is
1:08:22
genius.
1:08:23
I
1:08:23
remember
1:08:24
her
1:08:24
telling
1:08:25
me
1:08:25
about
1:08:25
this
1:08:25
new
1:08:25
thing
1:08:26
she
1:08:26
was
1:08:26
doing,
1:08:26
and
1:08:26
I
1:08:27
was
1:08:27
like,
1:08:27
what
1:08:27
is
1:08:27
it?
1:08:28
She
1:08:28
said,
1:08:28
it's
1:08:28
called
1:08:28
Hacks.
1:08:29
And
1:08:29
she
1:08:29
said,
1:08:30
kind
1:08:30
of
1:08:30
don't
1:08:30
like
1:08:30
the
1:08:31
title
1:08:31
because
1:08:31
I
1:08:31
think
1:08:31
it
1:08:32
sounds
1:08:32
like
1:08:32
someone
1:08:32
hacking
1:08:33
into
1:08:33
computers.
1:08:34
And
1:08:34
she
1:08:34
said,
1:08:34
but
1:08:35
it's
1:08:35
about
1:08:35
this
1:08:36
comedian,
1:08:37
you
1:08:37
know,
1:08:38
in,
1:08:38
you
1:08:38
know,
1:08:38
in
1:08:38
her
1:08:39
golden
1:08:39
years.
1:08:39
And
1:08:40
she
1:08:40
makes
1:08:40
a
1:08:40
comeback.
1:08:40
And
1:08:41
I
1:08:41
was
1:08:41
like,
1:08:41
oh,
1:08:41
that
1:08:41
sounds
1:08:41
great.
1:08:42
She
1:08:42
said,
1:08:43
I'm
1:08:43
doing
1:08:43
it
1:08:44
because
1:08:44
I
1:08:44
think
1:08:44
it's
1:08:45
great.
1:08:45
And
1:08:46
then
1:08:46
watching
1:08:46
the
1:08:46
world,
1:08:47
you
1:08:47
know,
1:08:47
receive
1:08:47
it,
1:08:48
and
1:08:48
I'm
1:08:48
like,
1:08:48
I
1:08:48
feel
1:08:48
just
1:08:49
like
1:08:49
I
1:08:49
was
1:08:49
on
1:08:50
the
1:08:50
inside,
1:08:51
you
1:08:51
know,
1:08:51
like,
1:08:51
you
1:08:51
knew
1:08:52
before.
1:08:52
I
1:08:52
knew
1:08:52
before.
1:08:53
And
1:08:53
I
1:08:53
just,
1:08:53
just.
1:08:53
That's
1:08:54
a
1:08:54
cool
1:08:54
feeling.
1:08:54
And
1:08:55
she's.
1:08:55
She
1:08:56
couldn't
1:08:56
be.
1:08:58
She
1:08:58
is
1:08:59
one
1:08:59
of
1:08:59
the
1:08:59
most
1:08:59
talented
1:09:00
people
1:09:00
on
1:09:01
planet
1:09:01
Earth.
1:09:01
And
1:09:02
every
1:09:02
time
1:09:02
I
1:09:02
talk
1:09:03
to
1:09:03
her,
1:09:04
get
1:09:04
together
1:09:04
with
1:09:04
her
1:09:04
and
1:09:05
have
1:09:05
a
1:09:05
meal
1:09:05
or
1:09:05
have
1:09:06
a
1:09:06
zoom
1:09:06
call,
1:09:06
I'm
1:09:06
just
1:09:07
like,
1:09:07
that's
1:09:07
Jane's
1:09:08
heart.
1:09:09
Growing
1:09:09
up
1:09:10
watching
1:09:10
her.
1:09:10
I
1:09:10
mean,
1:09:11
she's
1:09:11
been
1:09:11
on
1:09:12
so
1:09:12
many
1:09:12
amazing
1:09:13
projects.
1:09:14
She
1:09:15
has
1:09:15
been.
1:09:15
And
1:09:16
something
1:09:16
people
1:09:17
might
1:09:17
not
1:09:17
know
1:09:17
about
1:09:17
her,
1:09:18
you
1:09:18
know,
1:09:18
the
1:09:18
queer
1:09:18
community
1:09:19
loves
1:09:19
hacks.
1:09:20
Queer
1:09:20
community
1:09:21
love
1:09:21
Designing
1:09:22
Women.
1:09:22
But
1:09:23
she
1:09:23
was
1:09:23
an
1:09:24
early
1:09:25
advocate,
1:09:26
including,
1:09:26
but
1:09:26
not
1:09:27
limited
1:09:27
to.
1:09:27
I
1:09:28
think
1:09:28
her
1:09:28
first
1:09:29
kind
1:09:29
of
1:09:30
work
1:09:30
was
1:09:30
on
1:09:30
stage
1:09:31
telling
1:09:32
stories
1:09:32
about.
1:09:33
There
1:09:33
was
1:09:33
a
1:09:34
story
1:09:34
that.
1:09:35
A
1:09:35
play
1:09:35
that
1:09:35
she
1:09:36
did
1:09:36
about
1:09:36
a
1:09:36
gay
1:09:37
person.
1:09:37
Like,
1:09:38
she's
1:09:38
like
1:09:40
the
1:09:40
goat,
1:09:41
the
1:09:41
OG
1:09:42
of
1:09:42
being
1:09:43
a
1:09:43
straight
1:09:43
ally.
1:09:44
It's
1:09:45
who
1:09:45
she
1:09:45
is.
1:09:45
And
1:09:46
she
1:09:47
thinks
1:09:47
that
1:09:48
my
1:09:48
life
1:09:49
journey
1:09:49
is
1:09:50
valuable,
1:09:50
and
1:09:51
I
1:09:51
love
1:09:51
her
1:09:52
for
1:09:52
it.
1:09:53
Well,
1:09:53
it
1:09:53
is
1:09:53
very
1:09:54
interesting.
1:09:54
So
1:09:54
you'll
1:09:55
have
1:09:55
to
1:09:55
come
1:09:55
back
1:09:55
on
1:09:55
the
1:09:55
iconic
1:09:56
midlife
1:09:56
journey.
1:09:56
I'll
1:09:57
bring
1:09:57
Jean.
1:09:57
Yeah.
1:09:58
What
1:09:58
if
1:09:58
I
1:09:58
bring
1:09:58
Jean?
1:09:59
Oh,
1:09:59
my
1:09:59
God.
1:10:00
Wonderful.
1:10:00
Wonderful.
1:10:01
She's
1:10:01
an
1:10:01
amazing
1:10:02
iconic
1:10:03
woman,
1:10:03
and
1:10:04
I've
1:10:05
loved
1:10:05
talking
1:10:05
to
1:10:05
you
1:10:05
today.
1:10:06
Me
1:10:06
too.
1:10:06
Me
1:10:06
too.
1:10:07
I've
1:10:07
had
1:10:07
such
1:10:07
a
1:10:07
wonderful
1:10:08
time.
1:10:08
I'd
1:10:08
love
1:10:09
to
1:10:09
wrap
1:10:09
up
1:10:09
with
1:10:09
a.
1:10:10
Little
1:10:10
game
1:10:10
that
1:10:11
you
1:10:11
play.
1:10:12
Okay,
1:10:12
here
1:10:13
we
1:10:13
go.
1:10:13
This
1:10:14
is
1:10:14
a
1:10:14
little
1:10:14
rapid
1:10:14
fire
1:10:15
game.
1:10:15
Okay.
1:10:15
Love
1:10:15
rapid
1:10:16
fire.
1:10:16
Okay,
1:10:16
here
1:10:16
we
1:10:17
go.
1:10:17
Cowboy
1:10:18
boots
1:10:18
or
1:10:18
combat
1:10:19
boots?
1:10:20
Combat
1:10:20
boots.
1:10:20
Okay.
1:10:22
One
1:10:22
word
1:10:22
your
1:10:23
younger
1:10:23
self
1:10:23
would
1:10:24
use
1:10:24
to
1:10:24
describe
1:10:25
you
1:10:25
now.
1:10:26
Happy.
1:10:28
That's
1:10:28
great.
1:10:29
Biggest
1:10:30
midlife
1:10:30
flex.
1:10:32
My
1:10:32
career
1:10:33
pivot.
1:10:34
That's
1:10:35
a
1:10:35
good
1:10:35
one.
1:10:36
Guilty
1:10:36
pleasure
1:10:37
that
1:10:37
you're
1:10:37
zero
1:10:38
percent
1:10:38
guilty
1:10:39
about.
1:10:44
I've
1:10:44
been
1:10:44
watching
1:10:44
suits.
1:10:45
Oh,
1:10:46
you
1:10:46
are.
1:10:46
You
1:10:47
have?
1:10:48
And.
1:10:48
And
1:10:48
it's
1:10:48
so
1:10:49
not
1:10:49
like
1:10:49
me.
1:10:50
And
1:10:50
I.
1:10:51
I
1:10:51
started
1:10:51
watching
1:10:52
it
1:10:52
within
1:10:52
the
1:10:53
past
1:10:53
year
1:10:53
and
1:10:53
I.
1:10:55
I
1:10:55
love
1:10:55
it.
1:10:55
And
1:10:56
I
1:10:56
think.
1:10:56
And
1:10:56
it's
1:10:57
cheeky
1:10:57
and,
1:10:57
you
1:10:58
know,
1:10:58
and
1:10:58
I
1:10:58
love
1:10:59
it.
1:10:59
I
1:10:59
love
1:10:59
it.
1:11:00
What
1:11:00
did
1:11:00
you
1:11:00
think?
1:11:00
How
1:11:01
do
1:11:01
you
1:11:01
think
1:11:01
Meghan
1:11:01
is
1:11:01
on
1:11:02
the
1:11:02
show?
1:11:02
Meghan
1:11:02
Markle.
1:11:03
She's
1:11:03
amazing.
1:11:04
She's
1:11:04
amazing.
1:11:04
And
1:11:05
I
1:11:05
love
1:11:05
Lewis
1:11:06
Litt,
1:11:06
whatever
1:11:06
his
1:11:07
character.
1:11:07
I
1:11:07
don't
1:11:07
even
1:11:07
know
1:11:07
the
1:11:08
real
1:11:08
the
1:11:08
actors
1:11:09
names
1:11:09
except
1:11:09
for
1:11:10
Meghan
1:11:10
Markle,
1:11:10
but
1:11:11
I
1:11:12
love
1:11:13
it
1:11:13
and
1:11:13
I
1:11:13
do
1:11:13
not
1:11:13
feel
1:11:14
guilty
1:11:14
about
1:11:14
it.
1:11:15
Good.
1:11:15
I
1:11:16
love
1:11:16
it.
1:11:16
It's
1:11:16
my.
1:11:16
It's
1:11:17
my
1:11:17
new
1:11:17
best
1:11:17
friend.
1:11:17
Oh.
1:11:18
Oh,
1:11:18
that's
1:11:18
great.
1:11:18
Okay,
1:11:19
we
1:11:19
have
1:11:19
to
1:11:19
put
1:11:19
suits
1:11:20
in
1:11:20
the
1:11:20
queue.
1:11:20
I
1:11:20
need
1:11:20
to
1:11:21
watch
1:11:21
that.
1:11:21
Oh.
1:11:21
I'd
1:11:21
been
1:11:22
seeing
1:11:22
people
1:11:22
watching
1:11:22
it
1:11:23
for
1:11:23
years
1:11:23
and
1:11:23
I
1:11:23
was
1:11:23
like,
1:11:24
I
1:11:24
would.
1:11:24
That.
1:11:24
That
1:11:24
looks
1:11:25
dumb.
1:11:25
I
1:11:25
never
1:11:25
watched
1:11:26
that.
1:11:26
I
1:11:26
love
1:11:27
it.
1:11:27
I
1:11:27
think
1:11:27
the
1:11:27
characters
1:11:28
are
1:11:28
really
1:11:28
dynamic.
1:11:31
I
1:11:31
just.
1:11:31
I
1:11:32
love
1:11:32
it.
1:11:32
Oh,
1:11:32
that's
1:11:33
great.
1:11:33
Actually.
1:11:33
It's
1:11:34
a
1:11:34
great
1:11:34
show.
1:11:34
Okay.
1:11:35
Okay.
1:11:35
I'm
1:11:35
gonna
1:11:36
put
1:11:36
it
1:11:36
in
1:11:36
the
1:11:36
queue
1:11:36
for
1:11:36
sure.
1:11:37
It's
1:11:37
gotten
1:11:37
so
1:11:37
much,
1:11:37
you
1:11:38
know,
1:11:38
attention.
1:11:38
There's
1:11:38
a
1:11:38
reason
1:11:39
so
1:11:39
many
1:11:39
people
1:11:39
have
1:11:39
watched
1:11:40
it
1:11:40
and
1:11:40
the,
1:11:41
you
1:11:41
know,
1:11:41
the
1:11:41
wardrobe
1:11:42
and
1:11:42
Meghan
1:11:42
Markle
1:11:43
has,
1:11:43
you
1:11:43
know,
1:11:43
the
1:11:43
perfect
1:11:44
physique
1:11:44
and
1:11:45
another
1:11:45
woman.
1:11:45
Two.
1:11:46
Two
1:11:46
more
1:11:46
women
1:11:47
on
1:11:47
the
1:11:47
show
1:11:47
that,
1:11:47
like,
1:11:48
they're
1:11:48
dressed
1:11:48
to
1:11:48
the
1:11:49
nines
1:11:49
and
1:11:49
just.
1:11:50
I'm
1:11:50
like,
1:11:50
they
1:11:50
look
1:11:51
great
1:11:51
in
1:11:51
that.
1:11:51
And
1:11:51
so
1:11:52
it's
1:11:52
got
1:11:52
all
1:11:52
the
1:11:52
check
1:11:52
marks,
1:11:53
the
1:11:53
good
1:11:53
style,
1:11:54
like
1:11:54
the
1:11:54
fun.
1:11:54
Dialogue,
1:11:56
the
1:11:56
curse
1:11:56
words.
1:11:57
It's
1:11:58
like
1:11:58
a
1:11:58
network
1:11:58
thing.
1:11:59
But
1:11:59
they
1:11:59
dropped
1:11:59
the
1:12:00
F.
1:12:00
They
1:12:00
dropped,
1:12:00
you
1:12:01
know,
1:12:01
the
1:12:01
bad
1:12:01
language.
1:12:02
The.
1:12:02
They
1:12:03
don't
1:12:03
say
1:12:03
the
1:12:03
F
1:12:03
bomb.
1:12:03
But
1:12:04
I
1:12:04
like
1:12:04
It.
1:12:05
Okay.
1:12:05
Okay.
1:12:06
Yeah,
1:12:06
you're
1:12:06
gonna
1:12:06
like
1:12:06
it.
1:12:06
Let
1:12:07
me
1:12:07
know
1:12:07
what
1:12:07
you
1:12:07
think.
1:12:07
Okay,
1:12:08
Definitely.
1:12:09
Most
1:12:09
iconic
1:12:10
woman
1:12:10
over
1:12:11
40
1:12:11
that
1:12:12
you
1:12:12
know
1:12:12
or
1:12:13
that
1:12:13
it's
1:12:13
somebody
1:12:13
in
1:12:14
history.
1:12:14
It
1:12:14
could
1:12:14
be
1:12:14
anyone.
1:12:15
Jean
1:12:15
Smart.
1:12:16
I
1:12:16
mean,
1:12:17
duh,
1:12:18
duh.
1:12:18
Speed
1:12:19
that
1:12:19
one
1:12:19
up.
1:12:19
Right?
1:12:20
Jean
1:12:20
Smart.
1:12:21
Okay,
1:12:21
That's
1:12:22
a
1:12:22
good
1:12:22
one.
1:12:23
Midlife
1:12:24
mantra
1:12:24
in
1:12:24
three
1:12:25
words
1:12:25
or
1:12:25
less.
1:12:27
Use
1:12:28
your
1:12:28
power.
1:12:30
That's
1:12:30
great.
1:12:31
Use
1:12:31
my
1:12:32
power.
1:12:34
You
1:12:34
own
1:12:34
that
1:12:35
a
1:12:35
little
1:12:35
bit
1:12:35
more.
1:12:35
And
1:12:36
say
1:12:36
it
1:12:36
over
1:12:36
and
1:12:36
over
1:12:37
again,
1:12:37
right?
1:12:37
Use
1:12:37
my
1:12:38
power.
1:12:38
Use
1:12:38
my
1:12:38
power.
1:12:39
Okay.
1:12:40
Red
1:12:40
carpet
1:12:41
moment
1:12:41
or
1:12:41
Front
1:12:41
Porch
1:12:42
Chill?
1:12:43
Oh,
1:12:44
front
1:12:44
porch
1:12:44
chill.
1:12:45
100%
1:12:46
easy.
1:12:46
No
1:12:47
glam,
1:12:47
just
1:12:48
easy.
1:12:48
Yeah,
1:12:49
yeah.
1:12:49
It
1:12:50
is
1:12:50
a
1:12:50
whole
1:12:50
job
1:12:50
in
1:12:51
and
1:12:51
of
1:12:51
itself.
1:12:51
It
1:12:51
is
1:12:52
your
1:12:52
go
1:12:52
to
1:12:53
karaoke
1:12:53
song.
1:12:55
I've
1:12:55
never
1:12:55
done
1:12:56
karaoke.
1:12:56
You've
1:12:57
never
1:12:57
done
1:12:57
karaoke?
1:12:58
What?
1:12:59
I
1:13:00
don't
1:13:00
believe
1:13:00
that.
1:13:01
Never
1:13:01
done
1:13:02
it.
1:13:03
Well,
1:13:03
I
1:13:03
guess
1:13:03
you
1:13:03
don't
1:13:03
really
1:13:04
have
1:13:04
to
1:13:04
when
1:13:04
you're
1:13:04
a
1:13:04
singer.
1:13:05
You
1:13:05
can.
1:13:06
You're
1:13:06
cutting
1:13:06
your
1:13:07
own
1:13:07
albums.
1:13:07
I
1:13:08
mean,
1:13:09
I've
1:13:09
been
1:13:10
places
1:13:10
where
1:13:10
people
1:13:11
get
1:13:11
up
1:13:11
and
1:13:11
do
1:13:11
it.
1:13:11
I've
1:13:12
never
1:13:12
done
1:13:12
it,
1:13:13
really.
1:13:14
So
1:13:14
at
1:13:14
a
1:13:14
party,
1:13:15
if
1:13:15
some.
1:13:16
Has
1:13:16
somebody
1:13:16
asked
1:13:16
you,
1:13:16
oh,
1:13:17
will
1:13:17
you
1:13:17
sing
1:13:17
this
1:13:18
song,
1:13:18
or
1:13:19
will
1:13:19
you
1:13:19
just
1:13:19
sing
1:13:19
one
1:13:20
of
1:13:20
your
1:13:20
own?
1:13:20
Or
1:13:20
is
1:13:20
it
1:13:20
usually
1:13:20
somebody.
1:13:21
Just
1:13:21
laugh.
1:13:22
You're
1:13:22
crazy.
1:13:23
And
1:13:23
it's
1:13:24
not
1:13:24
that
1:13:24
I'm
1:13:24
like,
1:13:24
too
1:13:24
good
1:13:25
to
1:13:25
do.
1:13:26
Right.
1:13:27
Maybe
1:13:27
some
1:13:27
of
1:13:27
it
1:13:28
is
1:13:28
that
1:13:28
I'm
1:13:28
an
1:13:28
alto.
1:13:29
And
1:13:29
most.
1:13:30
Most
1:13:31
songs
1:13:31
that
1:13:32
I
1:13:32
would
1:13:32
sing
1:13:32
of
1:13:32
other
1:13:33
people's
1:13:34
are
1:13:34
like.
1:13:35
The
1:13:35
thing
1:13:36
about
1:13:36
being
1:13:36
a
1:13:36
live
1:13:36
musician,
1:13:37
when
1:13:37
I
1:13:37
used
1:13:38
to
1:13:38
play
1:13:38
shows
1:13:38
and
1:13:39
gigs,
1:13:40
I
1:13:40
could
1:13:40
take
1:13:40
the
1:13:40
songs
1:13:41
that
1:13:41
I
1:13:41
wanted
1:13:41
to
1:13:42
sing,
1:13:42
and
1:13:42
if
1:13:42
they
1:13:42
were
1:13:43
in
1:13:43
a
1:13:44
women's
1:13:44
key,
1:13:45
like,
1:13:45
I
1:13:45
can
1:13:46
transpose
1:13:46
them
1:13:47
down
1:13:47
a
1:13:47
half.
1:13:48
Half
1:13:48
step
1:13:48
or
1:13:48
a
1:13:48
whole.
1:13:49
Because
1:13:49
I
1:13:49
haven't.
1:13:49
I'm
1:13:50
an
1:13:50
alto,
1:13:51
so
1:13:51
most
1:13:51
famous
1:13:52
songs,
1:13:52
it's
1:13:52
like
1:13:53
women,
1:13:53
like,
1:13:53
showing
1:13:54
off
1:13:54
their
1:13:54
range.
1:13:54
I
1:13:54
don't.
1:13:55
I've
1:13:55
got
1:13:55
a
1:13:56
wide
1:13:56
range,
1:13:56
but
1:13:56
it.
1:13:57
It
1:13:57
skews
1:13:57
a
1:13:58
bit
1:13:58
lower.
1:13:59
So
1:14:00
maybe
1:14:00
it's
1:14:00
always
1:14:00
been
1:14:01
that.
1:14:02
That
1:14:03
I.
1:14:03
I
1:14:03
know
1:14:04
that
1:14:04
those
1:14:04
karaoke
1:14:05
songs
1:14:05
are
1:14:05
cut
1:14:05
in
1:14:05
the
1:14:05
key
1:14:06
that
1:14:06
the
1:14:06
artist
1:14:06
cut
1:14:06
it
1:14:07
in,
1:14:07
so
1:14:07
I
1:14:07
can't
1:14:07
change
1:14:07
the
1:14:08
key.
1:14:08
But
1:14:08
also,
1:14:09
like,
1:14:10
why
1:14:10
would
1:14:10
I
1:14:10
sing
1:14:11
karaoke?
1:14:12
Like,
1:14:12
give
1:14:12
me
1:14:12
a
1:14:12
guitar,
1:14:13
a
1:14:13
piano.
1:14:14
I
1:14:14
could
1:14:14
do
1:14:14
that.
1:14:15
Okay.
1:14:15
So.
1:14:16
And
1:14:16
I
1:14:16
just.
1:14:17
I
1:14:17
love
1:14:17
watching
1:14:17
other
1:14:18
people
1:14:18
do
1:14:18
it.
1:14:18
I
1:14:18
think
1:14:18
it's
1:14:19
amazing.
1:14:19
But
1:14:19
I've.
1:14:20
That's.
1:14:20
Yeah.
1:14:21
I've
1:14:21
got
1:14:21
an
1:14:21
idea.
1:14:21
And
1:14:22
my
1:14:22
songs
1:14:22
are
1:14:22
always
1:14:22
like.
1:14:23
People
1:14:23
say,
1:14:23
your
1:14:23
song
1:14:24
is
1:14:24
in
1:14:24
the
1:14:24
karaoke.
1:14:25
Come
1:14:25
do
1:14:25
it.
1:14:25
And
1:14:25
I'm
1:14:25
like,
1:14:26
okay,
1:14:26
the
1:14:27
next
1:14:27
time.
1:14:27
You
1:14:27
come
1:14:27
back,
1:14:27
I
1:14:27
will
1:14:28
have
1:14:28
a
1:14:28
karaoke
1:14:28
machine
1:14:29
in
1:14:29
here
1:14:29
ready
1:14:30
for
1:14:30
you.
1:14:30
And
1:14:30
we'll
1:14:30
sing
1:14:30
my
1:14:31
songs.
1:14:31
Yes,
1:14:31
we'll
1:14:31
see
1:14:31
your
1:14:32
songs.
1:14:32
And
1:14:32
Gene
1:14:33
will
1:14:33
be
1:14:33
here
1:14:34
because
1:14:34
they're.
1:14:34
Cut
1:14:35
in
1:14:35
the
1:14:35
key
1:14:35
that
1:14:35
I
1:14:35
recorded
1:14:36
them
1:14:36
in.
1:14:36
I
1:14:37
know
1:14:37
the
1:14:37
key
1:14:37
works
1:14:37
for
1:14:37
me
1:14:38
because
1:14:38
they're
1:14:38
my
1:14:38
songs.
1:14:39
Right.
1:14:39
That
1:14:40
makes
1:14:40
sense.
1:14:40
Right?
1:14:41
We'll
1:14:41
do
1:14:41
it.
1:14:42
You're
1:14:42
like,
1:14:42
okay,
1:14:42
that
1:14:42
was.
1:14:42
I'll
1:14:43
sing
1:14:43
karaoke
1:14:43
with
1:14:44
you.
1:14:44
Yes.
1:14:44
Oh,
1:14:45
my
1:14:45
gosh.
1:14:45
Okay.
1:14:45
This
1:14:45
will
1:14:46
be
1:14:46
so
1:14:46
fun.
1:14:46
Do
1:14:46
you
1:14:47
have
1:14:47
a
1:14:47
favorite
1:14:47
cocktail?
1:14:48
I
1:14:48
don't
1:14:48
drink.
1:14:49
Oh,
1:14:49
okay.
1:14:49
Yeah.
1:14:50
Incredible.
1:14:50
I'll
1:14:50
help.
1:14:50
Some
1:14:50
fresh
1:14:51
water
1:14:51
for
1:14:51
you
1:14:51
then.
1:14:52
Yeah.
1:14:52
And
1:14:52
it's
1:14:53
not.
1:14:53
And
1:14:53
I
1:14:53
used
1:14:53
to
1:14:54
drink
1:14:54
a
1:14:54
little
1:14:54
here
1:14:55
and
1:14:55
there.
1:14:55
I'm
1:14:55
not
1:14:55
in
1:14:55
the
1:14:55
program.
1:14:56
I'm.
1:14:57
But
1:14:57
I.
1:14:58
It
1:14:58
always
1:14:59
triggered
1:14:59
migraines
1:14:59
for
1:15:00
me,
1:15:00
and
1:15:00
I
1:15:00
had
1:15:00
a
1:15:00
stroke
1:15:01
in
1:15:01
2018.
1:15:01
That's
1:15:02
right.
1:15:02
That's.
1:15:02
That
1:15:02
was
1:15:02
migraine
1:15:03
related.
1:15:03
And
1:15:03
I'm
1:15:04
just.
1:15:04
Also,
1:15:06
I
1:15:06
don't
1:15:06
want
1:15:07
to
1:15:07
drink.
1:15:07
I
1:15:07
don't
1:15:07
drink
1:15:08
because
1:15:08
I
1:15:08
want
1:15:08
to
1:15:09
wake
1:15:09
up
1:15:09
with
1:15:09
an
1:15:09
advantage.
1:15:10
Right,
1:15:11
Right.
1:15:11
And
1:15:11
because
1:15:12
I
1:15:12
have
1:15:12
10,000
1:15:12
sunrises
1:15:13
left,
1:15:14
alcohol
1:15:14
makes
1:15:14
me
1:15:15
feel
1:15:15
bad.
1:15:16
And
1:15:16
I
1:15:17
do
1:15:17
like
1:15:17
the
1:15:17
taste
1:15:17
of
1:15:18
wine,
1:15:18
but
1:15:18
it's
1:15:18
like,
1:15:19
just.
1:15:19
Yeah.
1:15:21
So
1:15:21
my
1:15:21
favorite
1:15:21
drink,
1:15:22
though,
1:15:23
is
1:15:23
Fresca.
1:15:24
Oh.
1:15:24
Oh,
1:15:25
I
1:15:25
love
1:15:25
Fresca.
1:15:26
That's
1:15:26
nice.
1:15:26
And
1:15:26
I
1:15:26
didn't
1:15:27
know
1:15:27
until,
1:15:27
like,
1:15:27
a
1:15:28
few
1:15:28
years
1:15:28
ago
1:15:28
that
1:15:28
they
1:15:29
brought
1:15:29
it
1:15:29
back,
1:15:30
so.
1:15:30
Yeah.
1:15:30
Fresca
1:15:31
or
1:15:31
water,
1:15:32
orange
1:15:32
juice,
1:15:32
coffee.
1:15:34
I
1:15:35
like
1:15:35
grapefruit
1:15:35
juice.
1:15:36
Had
1:15:36
some
1:15:36
this
1:15:36
morning.
1:15:37
Oh.
1:15:37
So
1:15:38
I'm
1:15:38
one
1:15:38
of
1:15:39
those,
1:15:39
you
1:15:39
know,
1:15:39
not.
1:15:40
I'm
1:15:40
not
1:15:40
sober.
1:15:41
Right.
1:15:41
I
1:15:41
just
1:15:41
don't
1:15:42
drink.
1:15:42
No.
1:15:42
You
1:15:42
know
1:15:42
what?
1:15:43
As
1:15:43
I've
1:15:43
gotten
1:15:43
older,
1:15:43
I
1:15:44
notice
1:15:44
a
1:15:44
difference.
1:15:45
Even
1:15:45
one
1:15:45
glass
1:15:45
of
1:15:46
wine
1:15:46
the
1:15:46
next
1:15:46
day.
1:15:47
Yeah.
1:15:48
Shit.
1:15:48
Yeah.
1:15:48
You
1:15:48
know,
1:15:49
don't
1:15:49
have
1:15:49
time
1:15:49
for
1:15:50
a
1:15:50
headache.
1:15:50
No.
1:15:50
I've
1:15:51
got
1:15:51
to
1:15:51
do.
1:15:51
Yes.
1:15:52
Let's
1:15:52
go.
1:15:53
Let's
1:15:53
freaking
1:15:54
go.
1:15:55
We've
1:15:55
got
1:15:55
a
1:15:55
lot
1:15:56
going
1:15:56
on.
1:15:56
Yeah.
1:15:57
Okay.
1:15:58
So
1:15:58
one
1:15:58
thing.
1:15:59
Oh,
1:15:59
well,
1:15:59
this
1:16:00
might
1:16:00
be
1:16:00
the
1:16:00
answer
1:16:00
to
1:16:01
the
1:16:01
next
1:16:01
question.
1:16:02
One
1:16:02
thing
1:16:02
you
1:16:02
finally
1:16:03
gave
1:16:03
up
1:16:03
and
1:16:03
don't
1:16:03
miss
1:16:03
at
1:16:04
all.
1:16:05
Yeah.
1:16:05
I
1:16:06
would
1:16:06
say
1:16:06
giving
1:16:06
it
1:16:06
up
1:16:07
meant
1:16:07
that
1:16:07
I.
1:16:07
It
1:16:07
was
1:16:08
something
1:16:08
I
1:16:08
did
1:16:08
with
1:16:09
regularity.
1:16:10
One
1:16:10
thing
1:16:10
I
1:16:11
gave
1:16:11
up.
1:16:12
And
1:16:13
don't
1:16:13
miss
1:16:13
it
1:16:13
all.
1:16:14
Well,
1:16:14
I
1:16:14
haven't
1:16:15
had
1:16:15
meats
1:16:15
and
1:16:15
since
1:16:16
1997.
1:16:17
Oh,
1:16:18
we.
1:16:18
Was
1:16:19
it
1:16:19
because
1:16:19
of,
1:16:19
like,
1:16:19
an
1:16:19
animal?
1:16:20
Like,
1:16:20
just.
1:16:20
I
1:16:21
got
1:16:21
food
1:16:21
poisoning
1:16:22
at
1:16:22
one
1:16:22
point,
1:16:22
and
1:16:23
I
1:16:23
thought
1:16:23
it
1:16:23
was
1:16:23
from
1:16:23
the
1:16:24
chicken.
1:16:24
It
1:16:24
was
1:16:24
probably
1:16:24
from
1:16:25
the
1:16:25
hollandaise
1:16:25
sauce.
1:16:26
But
1:16:26
I
1:16:26
went,
1:16:26
like,
1:16:27
a
1:16:27
week
1:16:27
without
1:16:28
meat.
1:16:28
And
1:16:28
then
1:16:28
I
1:16:28
was
1:16:29
like,
1:16:29
because.
1:16:30
And
1:16:30
this
1:16:30
is
1:16:30
very
1:16:30
much
1:16:30
my
1:16:31
personality.
1:16:31
I'm.
1:16:32
I
1:16:32
tend
1:16:33
to
1:16:33
do
1:16:33
extreme.
1:16:34
I
1:16:34
tend
1:16:34
to
1:16:35
go
1:16:35
in
1:16:35
extremes.
1:16:35
Okay.
1:16:36
Which
1:16:36
is,
1:16:36
I
1:16:36
think,
1:16:37
from
1:16:37
growing
1:16:38
up
1:16:39
poor
1:16:39
and
1:16:40
hyper
1:16:40
disciplined.
1:16:41
When
1:16:41
you're
1:16:41
a
1:16:41
closeted
1:16:42
queer
1:16:42
person,
1:16:43
you
1:16:43
get
1:16:43
hyper
1:16:43
disciplined
1:16:44
about
1:16:44
things.
1:16:45
And,
1:16:46
and
1:16:46
so
1:16:47
I
1:16:47
went
1:16:47
a
1:16:48
week
1:16:48
without
1:16:48
meat
1:16:48
and
1:16:48
I
1:16:49
was
1:16:49
like,
1:16:49
maybe
1:16:49
I'll
1:16:49
go
1:16:49
two
1:16:49
weeks,
1:16:50
maybe
1:16:50
I'll
1:16:50
go
1:16:50
three
1:16:51
weeks.
1:16:51
And
1:16:51
it's
1:16:52
been,
1:16:52
you
1:16:52
know,
1:16:52
since
1:16:53
the
1:16:53
late
1:16:53
90s.
1:16:54
And
1:16:54
you
1:16:54
don't
1:16:54
miss
1:16:54
it,
1:16:54
right?
1:16:55
I
1:16:55
don't
1:16:56
miss
1:16:56
it.
1:16:56
I
1:16:56
think,
1:16:56
you
1:16:56
know,
1:16:57
I,
1:16:57
I
1:16:58
need
1:16:59
more
1:16:59
iron
1:16:59
and
1:17:00
protein.
1:17:00
And
1:17:01
now,
1:17:01
you
1:17:01
know,
1:17:01
I,
1:17:02
I
1:17:02
miss,
1:17:02
I
1:17:03
miss
1:17:04
it
1:17:04
like
1:17:04
I
1:17:04
smell
1:17:05
bacon
1:17:05
and
1:17:05
I
1:17:05
say
1:17:05
to
1:17:05
my
1:17:06
wife,
1:17:06
breathe.
1:17:06
In
1:17:06
my
1:17:06
face,
1:17:08
get
1:17:08
all
1:17:08
the
1:17:08
air.
1:17:09
But
1:17:09
I
1:17:10
kind
1:17:10
of
1:17:10
like,
1:17:11
I
1:17:11
don't
1:17:11
like
1:17:11
to
1:17:11
break
1:17:11
my
1:17:12
streaks.
1:17:12
I'm
1:17:13
very
1:17:13
much
1:17:13
into.
1:17:13
Nope,
1:17:14
I
1:17:14
made
1:17:14
a
1:17:14
decision.
1:17:15
I
1:17:15
don't
1:17:15
do
1:17:15
that.
1:17:15
It's
1:17:16
discipline
1:17:16
right
1:17:16
there.
1:17:16
I
1:17:17
mean,
1:17:17
it
1:17:18
is,
1:17:18
it's
1:17:18
carried
1:17:18
you
1:17:19
through.
1:17:19
Yeah,
1:17:19
I
1:17:20
just.
1:17:20
And
1:17:20
I
1:17:20
should
1:17:20
probably
1:17:21
relax
1:17:21
a
1:17:22
little
1:17:22
bit
1:17:22
and
1:17:22
have
1:17:22
a
1:17:22
hot
1:17:22
dog.
1:17:23
That
1:17:23
could
1:17:24
be
1:17:24
later.
1:17:24
That
1:17:24
could
1:17:24
be
1:17:25
later.
1:17:25
But
1:17:25
at
1:17:26
this
1:17:26
point,
1:17:27
you
1:17:27
know,
1:17:27
I,
1:17:27
you
1:17:28
know,
1:17:28
I,
1:17:29
I
1:17:29
would
1:17:29
like
1:17:29
to
1:17:29
live
1:17:29
to
1:17:30
100
1:17:30
and
1:17:30
I
1:17:30
feel
1:17:30
like
1:17:31
I'm
1:17:32
pescatarian,
1:17:32
so
1:17:33
I
1:17:33
eat
1:17:33
dairy
1:17:33
and
1:17:34
eggs
1:17:34
and
1:17:35
so,
1:17:35
yeah,
1:17:36
that's
1:17:36
what
1:17:36
I
1:17:36
gave
1:17:36
up
1:17:36
and
1:17:37
don't
1:17:37
really
1:17:37
miss
1:17:37
it.
1:17:37
Okay,
1:17:38
that's
1:17:38
a
1:17:38
good
1:17:38
one.
1:17:40
Hot
1:17:40
take.
1:17:41
Therapy
1:17:41
is
1:17:42
blank,
1:17:43
necessary.
1:17:45
Everyone
1:17:45
needs
1:17:45
it.
1:17:46
Don't
1:17:46
you
1:17:46
think
1:17:46
everyone
1:17:47
needs
1:17:47
it?
1:17:47
I'm
1:17:47
a
1:17:47
believer
1:17:48
in
1:17:48
that.
1:17:48
I've
1:17:48
been
1:17:48
going
1:17:48
to
1:17:48
therapy
1:17:49
since
1:17:49
I
1:17:49
was
1:17:49
23.
1:17:50
Okay.
1:17:51
I
1:17:51
wouldn't
1:17:51
have
1:17:51
been
1:17:52
able,
1:17:52
I
1:17:52
wouldn't
1:17:53
be
1:17:53
here.
1:17:55
I
1:17:55
wouldn't
1:17:55
be,
1:17:56
I
1:17:56
would
1:17:57
not
1:17:57
have
1:17:57
forgiven.
1:17:58
Been
1:17:59
able
1:17:59
to
1:17:59
forgive
1:18:00
people
1:18:01
in
1:18:01
my
1:18:01
life.
1:18:01
And
1:18:01
I
1:18:02
wouldn't
1:18:02
have
1:18:02
been
1:18:02
able
1:18:02
to
1:18:02
seek
1:18:03
forgiveness
1:18:03
and
1:18:04
my
1:18:04
life
1:18:05
were
1:18:05
it
1:18:06
not
1:18:06
for
1:18:06
the
1:18:06
skills
1:18:07
and
1:18:07
the
1:18:07
things
1:18:07
and
1:18:08
the
1:18:08
self
1:18:09
reflection
1:18:09
and
1:18:10
the
1:18:10
habits
1:18:11
that
1:18:11
I
1:18:11
learned
1:18:12
in
1:18:12
therapy.
1:18:14
Therapy
1:18:14
is
1:18:15
as
1:18:16
needed
1:18:16
as
1:18:16
water
1:18:17
and
1:18:17
sustenance.
1:18:18
And
1:18:19
everybody
1:18:20
needs
1:18:20
therapy.
1:18:21
Everybody.
1:18:22
What
1:18:22
a
1:18:22
gift.
1:18:22
What
1:18:23
a
1:18:23
gift
1:18:23
it
1:18:23
is.
1:18:24
There's
1:18:24
something
1:18:24
so
1:18:24
cathartic
1:18:25
about
1:18:25
talking
1:18:25
to
1:18:26
somebody
1:18:26
who
1:18:27
is
1:18:27
not
1:18:27
in
1:18:27
your
1:18:28
orbit.
1:18:28
You
1:18:28
know,
1:18:29
just
1:18:29
a
1:18:29
true
1:18:30
third
1:18:30
party.
1:18:30
Right,
1:18:31
right.
1:18:31
Who
1:18:31
has
1:18:32
no
1:18:32
skin
1:18:32
in
1:18:32
the
1:18:32
game,
1:18:33
you
1:18:33
know,
1:18:33
can't
1:18:33
tell
1:18:33
yet.
1:18:34
Yes.
1:18:34
No.
1:18:35
You
1:18:35
know,
1:18:35
and
1:18:36
give
1:18:36
you
1:18:36
honest
1:18:36
feedback.
1:18:37
In
1:18:37
fact,
1:18:37
I.
1:18:39
In
1:18:39
2008,
1:18:40
I
1:18:40
went
1:18:40
to
1:18:42
a
1:18:42
retreat
1:18:42
called
1:18:43
the
1:18:43
Hoffman
1:18:43
Institute.
1:18:44
Oh,
1:18:44
you
1:18:44
did?
1:18:44
Hoffman.
1:18:45
Wouldn't
1:18:45
you
1:18:45
think
1:18:46
that
1:18:46
changed
1:18:47
my
1:18:47
life?
1:18:47
It
1:18:48
kind
1:18:48
of
1:18:48
took
1:18:48
all
1:18:49
of
1:18:49
what
1:18:49
I
1:18:49
had
1:18:49
learned
1:18:50
in
1:18:50
therapy
1:18:50
for,
1:18:51
you
1:18:51
know,
1:18:52
the
1:18:52
15
1:18:52
years
1:18:52
prior,
1:18:53
and
1:18:54
it
1:18:54
really
1:18:54
coalesced
1:18:55
and
1:18:55
put
1:18:55
into
1:18:56
action
1:18:58
the
1:18:58
true
1:18:59
tenets
1:18:59
of,
1:19:00
you
1:19:00
know,
1:19:01
compassion,
1:19:01
love,
1:19:02
forgiveness.
1:19:03
It.
1:19:04
The
1:19:04
Hoffman
1:19:05
process
1:19:05
changed
1:19:06
my
1:19:06
life
1:19:06
in
1:19:07
so
1:19:07
many
1:19:08
amazing
1:19:08
ways.
1:19:08
I
1:19:09
think
1:19:09
about
1:19:09
it
1:19:09
every
1:19:09
day.
1:19:10
I
1:19:10
still
1:19:10
do.
1:19:11
It
1:19:11
changed
1:19:12
me
1:19:12
and
1:19:13
helped
1:19:14
me
1:19:14
Continue
1:19:14
to
1:19:15
grow.
1:19:15
So,
1:19:15
yeah,
1:19:15
I'm
1:19:15
a
1:19:15
Hoffman
1:19:16
grad.
1:19:16
Did
1:19:16
you
1:19:16
go?
1:19:17
No,
1:19:17
I
1:19:17
didn't,
1:19:17
but
1:19:17
I've
1:19:18
been
1:19:18
really
1:19:18
wanting
1:19:18
to.
1:19:19
Life
1:19:19
changing.
1:19:20
Life
1:19:20
changing.
1:19:20
That's
1:19:21
a
1:19:21
friend
1:19:21
of
1:19:21
mine,
1:19:21
Brooke
1:19:21
Baldwin,
1:19:22
who
1:19:22
is
1:19:22
a
1:19:23
journalist.
1:19:23
She
1:19:24
and
1:19:24
I
1:19:24
were
1:19:24
texting
1:19:25
a
1:19:25
couple
1:19:25
of
1:19:25
years
1:19:25
ago
1:19:26
and.
1:19:27
And
1:19:27
we
1:19:27
hadn't
1:19:27
checked
1:19:28
in
1:19:28
for
1:19:28
a
1:19:28
few
1:19:28
months,
1:19:29
and
1:19:29
she
1:19:29
said,
1:19:30
by
1:19:30
the
1:19:30
way,
1:19:30
I
1:19:31
want
1:19:31
to
1:19:31
talk
1:19:31
to
1:19:31
you
1:19:31
about
1:19:32
a
1:19:32
place
1:19:32
called
1:19:32
the
1:19:33
Hoffman
1:19:33
Institute.
1:19:34
If
1:19:34
you
1:19:34
haven't
1:19:34
ever
1:19:35
considered
1:19:35
it,
1:19:36
you
1:19:36
really
1:19:36
should.
1:19:37
And
1:19:37
I
1:19:37
wrote
1:19:37
Hoffman
1:19:38
2008.
1:19:39
It's
1:19:39
like,
1:19:39
I
1:19:40
should
1:19:40
have
1:19:40
known
1:19:41
it.
1:19:42
You're
1:19:43
like,
1:19:43
been
1:19:43
there,
1:19:43
done
1:19:43
that.
1:19:44
Definitely
1:19:44
have
1:19:45
the
1:19:45
diploma.
1:19:45
Yeah.
1:19:46
And
1:19:46
it's.
1:19:46
And
1:19:47
I've
1:19:47
encouraged
1:19:47
a
1:19:48
lot
1:19:48
of
1:19:48
people
1:19:49
to
1:19:49
go.
1:19:49
And
1:19:49
back
1:19:49
in
1:19:49
the
1:19:50
day,
1:19:50
you
1:19:50
kind
1:19:50
of
1:19:50
had
1:19:50
to
1:19:51
have
1:19:51
a
1:19:51
recommendation,
1:19:51
recommendation
1:19:52
letter
1:19:52
to
1:19:52
go.
1:19:53
It
1:19:53
was
1:19:53
hard
1:19:54
to
1:19:54
get
1:19:54
in.
1:19:54
And,
1:19:55
you
1:19:55
know,
1:19:55
people
1:19:55
had
1:19:56
to
1:19:56
kind
1:19:56
of
1:19:56
sponsor
1:19:56
and
1:19:57
vouch
1:19:57
for
1:19:57
you.
1:19:57
And
1:19:58
I
1:19:58
have.
1:19:58
I
1:19:58
sponsored
1:19:59
many
1:19:59
people,
1:20:00
and
1:20:01
I
1:20:01
am
1:20:01
forever,
1:20:02
forever
1:20:03
grateful
1:20:03
to
1:20:04
Rodney
1:20:04
Kral,
1:20:05
who
1:20:05
sponsored
1:20:05
me.
1:20:06
That's
1:20:06
wonderful.
1:20:07
Okay.
1:20:07
That's
1:20:08
also
1:20:08
in
1:20:08
the
1:20:08
queue.
1:20:08
That
1:20:08
must
1:20:09
get
1:20:09
done.
1:20:09
Yeah,
1:20:10
Go
1:20:10
do
1:20:10
it.
1:20:11
Okay.
1:20:11
Change
1:20:11
your
1:20:11
life.
1:20:12
Good,
1:20:12
good.
1:20:13
And
1:20:13
last
1:20:14
one.
1:20:14
Fill
1:20:14
in
1:20:14
the
1:20:14
blank.
1:20:15
Midlife
1:20:15
is
1:20:15
not
1:20:16
a
1:20:16
crisis.
1:20:16
It's
1:20:17
a.
1:20:18
An
1:20:18
opportunity.
1:20:20
There
1:20:21
it
1:20:21
is.
1:20:21
There
1:20:22
it
1:20:22
is.
1:20:22
There
1:20:22
it
1:20:23
is.
1:20:23
There
1:20:24
it
1:20:24
is.
1:20:25
That's
1:20:25
okay.
1:20:25
Will
1:20:26
we
1:20:26
do
1:20:26
that?
1:20:27
Sounds
1:20:28
easy
1:20:28
to
1:20:28
sing.
1:20:29
Yeah.
1:20:29
Right?
1:20:30
Not
1:20:30
a
1:20:30
lot
1:20:30
of
1:20:30
keys,
1:20:31
just
1:20:31
kind
1:20:31
of
1:20:31
like
1:20:31
in
1:20:31
the
1:20:32
middle.
1:20:32
Okay,
1:20:32
great,
1:20:32
great.
1:20:33
Let's
1:20:33
do
1:20:33
it.
1:20:33
We've
1:20:33
got
1:20:34
this.
1:20:34
I
1:20:34
love
1:20:34
that.
1:20:35
Thank
1:20:35
you
1:20:36
so
1:20:36
much,
1:20:36
Shelly.
1:20:36
It's
1:20:37
been
1:20:37
a
1:20:37
pleasure
1:20:37
having
1:20:38
you
1:20:38
on
1:20:38
today.
1:20:38
What
1:20:39
a
1:20:39
delight
1:20:39
to
1:20:39
talk
1:20:39
to
1:20:40
you
1:20:40
and
1:20:40
again,
1:20:41
thank
1:20:41
you
1:20:41
for
1:20:41
the
1:20:41
work
1:20:42
you're
1:20:42
doing
1:20:42
in
1:20:42
the
1:20:42
world
1:20:42
to
1:20:43
help
1:20:43
others
1:20:44
not
1:20:44
just
1:20:44
know
1:20:44
their
1:20:45
story,
1:20:45
but
1:20:45
tell
1:20:45
their
1:20:45
story.
1:20:46
Oh,
1:20:46
thank
1:20:47
you
1:20:47
so
1:20:47
much.
1:20:47
That
1:20:47
means
1:20:47
everything
1:20:48
to
1:20:48
me.
1:20:48
Really
1:20:48
important.
1:20:49
Please
1:20:49
tell
1:20:50
everybody
1:20:50
where
1:20:50
they
1:20:50
can
1:20:51
find
1:20:51
you.
1:20:52
They
1:20:52
can
1:20:52
find
1:20:52
me
1:20:53
on.
1:20:53
On
1:20:53
the
1:20:53
socials.
1:20:54
My
1:20:55
name
1:20:55
is
1:20:55
Shelly
1:20:55
Wright,
1:20:56
but
1:20:56
it's
1:20:56
spelled
1:20:56
with.
1:20:56
With
1:20:57
the
1:20:57
C,
1:20:57
C,
1:20:58
H,
1:20:58
E,
1:20:58
L,
1:20:58
Y,
1:20:59
W,
1:20:59
R,
1:20:59
I,
1:20:59
g,
1:21:00
h,
1:21:00
t.
1:21:01
Shelly.com.
1:21:02
oddly,
1:21:02
that's
1:21:03
had
1:21:04
it
1:21:04
forever.
1:21:06
LinkedIn.
1:21:07
So
1:21:07
if
1:21:07
you're.
1:21:08
You
1:21:08
want
1:21:08
to
1:21:08
connect
1:21:09
with
1:21:09
me
1:21:09
through
1:21:09
the
1:21:09
corporate
1:21:10
Lens,
1:21:10
I'm
1:21:11
on
1:21:11
LinkedIn
1:21:12
and
1:21:13
I'm
1:21:14
out
1:21:14
there.
1:21:14
I'm
1:21:14
easily
1:21:15
Google
1:21:16
able.
1:21:16
Find
1:21:16
me.
1:21:17
I'd
1:21:17
love
1:21:18
to
1:21:18
connect.
1:21:18
Wonderful.
1:21:19
Well,
1:21:19
thank
1:21:19
you
1:21:20
so
1:21:20
much.
1:21:20
Thank
1:21:20
you,
1:21:20
Roxy,
1:21:21
Shelley,
1:21:22
thank
1:21:22
you
1:21:23
for.
1:21:23
Showing
1:21:23
us
1:21:23
what
1:21:24
it
1:21:24
looks
1:21:24
like
1:21:24
to
1:21:25
stand
1:21:25
in
1:21:25
your
1:21:25
truth
1:21:26
with
1:21:26
grit,
1:21:27
grace,
1:21:27
and
1:21:28
zero
1:21:28
apologies.
1:21:29
Your
1:21:30
story
1:21:30
is
1:21:30
a
1:21:30
masterclass
1:21:31
in
1:21:31
courage
1:21:32
and
1:21:32
reinvention
1:21:33
and
1:21:34
such
1:21:34
a
1:21:34
powerful
1:21:34
reminder
1:21:35
that
1:21:35
midlife
1:21:36
isn't
1:21:36
about
1:21:36
fading
1:21:37
out.
1:21:38
It's
1:21:38
about
1:21:38
coming
1:21:38
in
1:21:39
louder,
1:21:39
strong,
1:21:40
stronger,
1:21:40
and
1:21:40
more
1:21:41
yourself
1:21:41
than
1:21:42
ever
1:21:42
before.
1:21:43
To
1:21:44
everyone
1:21:44
listening,
1:21:44
if
1:21:45
today's
1:21:45
conversation
1:21:46
moved
1:21:46
you,
1:21:47
inspired
1:21:47
you,
1:21:48
or
1:21:48
made
1:21:48
you
1:21:49
feel
1:21:49
a
1:21:49
little
1:21:49
more
1:21:50
seen,
1:21:51
make
1:21:51
sure
1:21:51
to
1:21:51
follow
1:21:52
the
1:21:52
iconic
1:21:53
midlife
1:21:53
on
1:21:54
your
1:21:54
favorite
1:21:54
podcast
1:21:55
platform.
1:21:56
Leave
1:21:56
a
1:21:56
review
1:21:57
5
1:21:57
star
1:21:58
please
1:21:59
and
1:21:59
share
1:21:59
this
1:22:00
episode
1:22:00
with
1:22:01
someone
1:22:01
who
1:22:01
needs
1:22:01
to
1:22:02
hear
1:22:02
it.
1:22:02
You
1:22:03
can
1:22:03
watch
1:22:03
the
1:22:03
full
1:22:04
interview
1:22:04
on
1:22:05
YouTube
1:22:05
today,
1:22:05
tomorrow
1:22:06
and
1:22:06
follow
1:22:06
us
1:22:07
on
1:22:07
all
1:22:07
of
1:22:07
the
1:22:07
social
1:22:08
media
1:22:08
platforms
1:22:09
Heconic
1:22:10
Midlife
1:22:11
and
1:22:11
you
1:22:11
can
1:22:12
also
1:22:12
follow
1:22:12
me
1:22:12
edcarpetroxy
1:22:14
for
1:22:14
more
1:22:15
unfiltered
1:22:16
midlife
1:22:16
magic.
1:22:17
Until
1:22:17
next
1:22:18
time,
1:22:18
stay
1:22:18
bold,
1:22:19
stay
1:22:19
brilliant,
1:22:20
and
1:22:21
stay
1:22:21
iconic.