Latest / Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families / #1188 - The Book That Changed Our Fussy Eater

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#1188 - The Book That Changed Our Fussy Eater · Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families

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  Speaker 1: A book review that might have just changed our family
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  Speaker 1: for the better in the most significant way when it
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  Speaker 1: comes to fussy eating, and imagine the kids gleefully, willingly,
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  Speaker 1: delightedly joining you in the kitchen to clean up the
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  Speaker 1: dinner time mess. Hello and welcome to the Happy Families Podcast,
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  Speaker 1: Real Parenting Solutions. Every day on Australia's most downloaded parenting podcast.
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  Speaker 1: We are Justin and Kylie Coulson. This is the day
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  Speaker 1: where we unpack the week that was. We look at
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  Speaker 1: what worked and what didn't, and we try to share
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  Speaker 1: with you a take home message to help your family
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  Speaker 1: be happier. Kylie, today you're going to kick us off
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  Speaker 1: with well a book review, because this may just have
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  Speaker 1: changed the game for our fussy eating ten year old.
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  Speaker 2: Did you know your tummy is alive?
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  Speaker 1: You tell me often that it makes a lot of noise.
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  Speaker 2: You have trillions of friends inside, not your school friends,
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  Speaker 2: silly bacteria friends.
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  Speaker 1: It sounds to me like you're reading a children's book.
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  Speaker 2: I am, I am. This book was sent to you recently.
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  Speaker 2: It's called The Friends You Don't Know You Have by
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  Speaker 2: Laney and Jordan Oldfield. Their teenage daughter Lylah actually illustrated
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  Speaker 2: these beautiful animations throughout the pages. And it's actually the
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  Speaker 2: first book in a series of books on gut health
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  Speaker 2: for children, so aimed at ten years and younger, and
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  Speaker 2: it's beautifully illustrated, and it simply explains to children at
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  Speaker 2: their level the special gut friends that they have in
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  Speaker 2: their tummy and how they can access the superpowers that
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  Speaker 2: these bacteria give our body for healthy wellbeing and living.
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  Speaker 2: So you had it sitting on your floor in the
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  Speaker 2: office four weeks.
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  Speaker 1: Yeah, literally, it's a kid's book. I just thought if
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  Speaker 1: I leave it there, it's big, it's colorful. Emily will
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  Speaker 1: eventually pick it up and have a look at it,
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  Speaker 1: or she won't. I did point it out to her
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  Speaker 1: once or twice, but no pressure, because I don't want to.
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  Speaker 2: The reality is if we had have come in and said,
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  Speaker 2: em let's sit down.
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  Speaker 1: And read here, there's a book that you need to
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  Speaker 1: read about your fussy eating.
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  Speaker 2: No way we would have had any buying whatsoever. But
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  Speaker 2: what I love about just even that acknowledgment is that
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  Speaker 2: our kids. We prime our kids all the time by
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  Speaker 2: leaving things within their view. This took weeks for her
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  Speaker 2: to actually pick up, but when she did, she was hooked.
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  Speaker 2: She picked it up. She started flicking through the pages
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  Speaker 2: and she realized, hmm, I could read this book. She
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  Speaker 2: took it away in about half an hour later, she
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  Speaker 2: came back and she said, Mum, do you know I've
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  Speaker 2: got friends in my tummy? And I said really, and
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  Speaker 2: she said, and they have names. There's Lacey, Biffy see her,
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  Speaker 2: and Strappy and did you know there's certain foods that
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  Speaker 2: make them super happy. So she started telling me the
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  Speaker 2: kinds of foods they like. She told me that Lacey
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  Speaker 2: was her favorite for it, and that Lacey's favorite foods
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  Speaker 2: with vegimite sour dough bread, kim butcher, brown rice, sweet potato,
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  Speaker 2: rolled oats, sour kraut, popcorn, and beetroot. Those when you
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  Speaker 2: listed it off like that, popcorns probably the safest bet, right,
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  Speaker 2: She se vegimite, but she doesn't like it a lot
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  Speaker 2: these days. But her big sister has started making sour
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  Speaker 2: dough bread, so she found that was actually a really
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  Speaker 2: easy addition to add to her diet. So she only
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  Speaker 2: has a small piece, but she decided that she'd start
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  Speaker 2: trying sour dough with some vegimite on it, and the
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  Speaker 2: book obviously then goes through the other bacteria and the
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  Speaker 2: foods that they like. But what I love about it
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  Speaker 2: is at the end it says, if food is what
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  Speaker 2: they want, then food is what they'll get. Let's choose
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  Speaker 2: one new food from each friend's favorite foodless and give
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  Speaker 2: it a world this week. So it kind of provides
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  Speaker 2: a little bit of a challenge. So I didn't have
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  Speaker 2: to say anything. The book did all the work for me.
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  Speaker 2: She pulled up list and she said, Okay, Mom, I'm
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  Speaker 2: going to try pomegranites, sour dough, olfalfa is sprouts, and
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  Speaker 2: I can't remember the other food off the top of
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  Speaker 2: my head now. And she actually did it without me
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  Speaker 2: having to have anks with her or you know, bribe
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  Speaker 2: her or challenge her or anything like that. This one
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  Speaker 2: book has opened her eyes to the fact that there
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  Speaker 2: are things that she can do to help her body
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  Speaker 2: be healthier and to feel better, and she's done it.
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  Speaker 1: I was blown away when she sat down at the
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  Speaker 1: table to eat with us. She one of the challenges
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  Speaker 1: with kids that don't want to eat the foods that
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  Speaker 1: you're putting out is you kind of feel well. They
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  Speaker 1: don't want to eat anyth because they don't want to
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  Speaker 1: eat our meals. But she's pretty happy to eat a
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  Speaker 1: whole lot of foods. She just likes them to look
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  Speaker 1: like a Bento box on her plate, mixed. But she
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  Speaker 1: sat down the other day with like half a plate
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  Speaker 1: of alfalfa sprouts, which is I'm the only one in
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  Speaker 1: the house that eats them, and I kind of like
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  Speaker 1: the fact that they're there whenever I need them. And
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  Speaker 1: I can't get access to the alfalfa sprouts anymore because
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  Speaker 1: she keeps on eating all the sprouts. We need to
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  Speaker 1: start growing them. But clearly the book has had an impact.
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  Speaker 1: Like you said, it's one in a series The Friends
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  Speaker 1: You Don't Know You Have by Laney and Jordan Oldfield,
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  Speaker 1: So we'll link to that in the show notes. The
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  Speaker 1: real take home message is force creates resistance. Yeah, like,
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  Speaker 1: if you try and make your kids eat as we
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  Speaker 1: have tried for so many years, if.
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  Speaker 2: I had to put ol falv sprouts on her plate unannounced,
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  Speaker 2: holy smokes.
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  Speaker 1: Yeah. But instead she reads it in the book and
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  Speaker 1: she's willing to give it a crack. And because she
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  Speaker 1: feels like she's in the driver's seat of her diet.
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  Speaker 1: Just a massive, massive shift over the last week or So.
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  Speaker 2: So I guess there's a couple of take homes. I mean, obviously,
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  Speaker 2: there's the acknowledgment that if we find good resources for
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  Speaker 2: our kids, they can actually be the teachers without us
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  Speaker 2: having to be. Yeah.
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  Speaker 1: Yeah. Secondly, and she did, didn't she? I mean, she
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  Speaker 1: really wanted to teach you about what her gut needs. Yeah.
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  Speaker 2: But secondly, sometimes it takes time, and the more we
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  Speaker 2: pressure and the more we force things, the less likely
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  Speaker 2: we are to have positive outcomes. But just priming our
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  Speaker 2: kids by leaving a book around that will eventually pique
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  Speaker 2: their interests, or have it open, even on your coffee
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  Speaker 2: table somewhere where they can see it multiple times before
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  Speaker 2: it actually they go oh, hang in a sec. So
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  Speaker 2: my take home message is twofold Number one, if you
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  Speaker 2: can find a resource that will do your job, the
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  Speaker 2: children are probably going to listen to it much more.
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  Speaker 1: Especially if you can then if they willingly come to
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  Speaker 1: you and say, hey, look what I learn.
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  Speaker 2: That's exactly yeah. And number two, sometimes it takes the
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  Speaker 2: help of mum and dad to strategically place things in
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  Speaker 2: their children's path for them to be able to take
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  Speaker 2: from it the things that we need them to.
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  Speaker 1: Up next how you can get the kids actively, willingly
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  Speaker 1: and fully engaged in cleaning up the kitchen after dinner. Okay, Kylie,
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  Speaker 1: you've had tremendous success with our daughter and her gut friends,
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  Speaker 1: friends that she doesn't know that she has. I had
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  Speaker 1: a big win this week. This is something that we've
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  Speaker 1: done consistently through the years, but I wanted to reemphasize
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  Speaker 1: it in today's I'll Do Better Tomorrow because it was
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  Speaker 1: just so delightfully impactful. I just had the coolest experience.
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  Speaker 1: We have talked about regularly doing chores, tasks, family responsibilities together,
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  Speaker 1: and we've often discussed this idea of all in all
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  Speaker 1: in means we're all in the kitchen, or we're all
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  Speaker 1: in the garden weeding, or we're all in whatever space
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  Speaker 1: it is that needs cleaning up. Our second eldest daughter
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  Speaker 1: created a game years ago, and they've decided it's a
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  Speaker 1: terrible name for the game. We've got to come up
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  Speaker 1: with something better for it. But the kids call it
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  Speaker 1: word association. All they do is they come up with
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  Speaker 1: a theme and then while they're doing the dishes or
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  Speaker 1: doing whatever task or responsibility is theirs, they have to
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  Speaker 1: come up with in order as many songs as they
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  Speaker 1: possibly can that refer to that theme.
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  Speaker 2: So when you say in order, they take turns in order.
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  Speaker 1: So yeah, so it's Abby, then it's Annie, then it's Lily,
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  Speaker 1: then it's back to Abby again or whoever's in the
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  Speaker 1: kitchen doing it.
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  Speaker 2: And the person who the person who is the first
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  Speaker 2: one to not be able to add to the list
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  Speaker 2: is they're out.
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  Speaker 1: Yeah, And sometimes I mean I find the game annoying
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  Speaker 1: because they want to do like songs on the Wicked soundtrack.
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  Speaker 1: It's like, well, how many songs are on the Wicked soundtrack?
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  Speaker 1: And since you are on know the Wicked soundtrack off
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  Speaker 1: by heart, this is going to be a pretty boring game.
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  Speaker 1: They do or Taylor Swift, they'll do Taylor Swift songs
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  Speaker 1: and then they'll.
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  Speaker 2: Just do Disney or they'll do songs.
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  Speaker 1: And it's like, no, there's bajillions of those songs, and
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  Speaker 1: and I don't know just that annoys me. It annoys me.
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  Speaker 1: But the other night I decided that I was going
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  Speaker 1: to play word association with them because there was a
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  Speaker 1: big clean up in the kitchen that was required, and
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  Speaker 1: I knew that we needed to pull out all stops,
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  Speaker 1: and so they wanted to do love, and I'm like,
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  Speaker 1: you do love all the time, and there's bajillion love songs.
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  Speaker 1: What about transportation? Modes of transportation? Could we do a
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  Speaker 1: word association song list modes of transportation? And the kids
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  Speaker 1: are like, that's bored. Yeah, like they really complained. We
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  Speaker 1: cleaned the kitchen and the dining room and the rest
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  Speaker 1: of the house and you were still going for about
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  Speaker 1: forty minutes. It was still going.
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  Speaker 2: And what was really cool. It's one of the first
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  Speaker 2: times fun Emily has joined in. Yeah, it was really cool,
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  Speaker 2: and she came up with some great songs.
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  Speaker 1: There are so many songs that involve modes of transportation.
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  Speaker 1: One of the first ones that Emily came up with
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  Speaker 1: was I would walk five hundred miles. But the thing is,
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  Speaker 1: as soon as someone says the song, the whole family
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  Speaker 1: just bursts into songs. Yeap, And I mean the neighbors
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  Speaker 1: must think what in the world is going on in
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  Speaker 1: that house because every fifteen seconds there's a new song.
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  Speaker 1: But it's just so simple and it's so much fun,
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  Speaker 1: and it makes the task completely invisible. They're all in
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  Speaker 1: the kitchen and yeah, we're doing the dishes, but no
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  Speaker 1: one's thinking about the dishes, everyone's thinking about the game, and.
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  Speaker 2: No one's fighting because they're too busy singing.
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  Speaker 1: Yeah, unless they're fighting about whether or not that song
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  Speaker 1: really does fit the theme.
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  Speaker 2: Well that was only you, that's true.
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  Speaker 1: I do get a big competitive around this stuff. Former
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  Speaker 1: radio announcing here, we need to make sure that everything fits.
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  Speaker 1: But it's so funny as well, because especially when you've
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  Speaker 1: got teenagers, they know every song lyric to, every song
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  Speaker 1: that's important to them. And so I thought I was
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  Speaker 1: really clever. I came up with Ed Sheeran when he's
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  Speaker 1: got that. I'm on my way driving at ninety listening
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  Speaker 1: to Tiny Dancer that the Castle on Hill song, you
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  Speaker 1: know the one. I felt like I was so clever
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  Speaker 1: for coming up with that one. And then these kids,
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  Speaker 1: they're singing this song with the most obscure reference to
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  Speaker 1: a car or to to whatever. So much fun, so
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  Speaker 1: much laughter, and it made doing a really big job
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  Speaker 1: delightful rather than drudgery. So my take home message literally
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  Speaker 1: is create games, make up your own games, have fun,
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  Speaker 1: steal our games. Doesn't really matter. When you get in
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  Speaker 1: there and you do stuff together, and when you're having
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  Speaker 1: fun and playing games, the chore kind of disappears into
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  Speaker 1: invisibility because it's really about time together now rather than
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  Speaker 1: getting the kitchen tidy. So therefore, we really hope that
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  Speaker 1: the ideas that we shared with you today will help
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  Speaker 1: to make your family happier. We will link to the
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  Speaker 1: book The Friends You Don't Know You Have in the
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  Speaker 1: show notes, and I don't know good like playing Word
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  Speaker 1: Associations or some other game that works for you and
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  Speaker 1: your family when you next have to do some chores
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  Speaker 1: and carry out all those housekeeping responsibilities. The Happy Families
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  Speaker 1: podcast is produced by Justin Roland from Bridge Media. For
• 11:42
  Speaker 1: more information and resources about making your family happier, please
• 11:45
  Speaker 1: visit us at happy families dot com dot au and
• 11:48
  Speaker 1: have a great weekend.