Latest / Privycast / Ep. 143 Decorative Alligator w/ Jesse Turkington (Privychat 34)

Transcript

Ep. 143 Decorative Alligator w/ Jesse Turkington (Privychat 34) · Privycast

• 0:00
  >> Hunter Hoover: But I was the janitor, so I went in and the toilet
• 0:03
  is just plugged. And, uh, what in the
• 0:06
  world? And I kind of started to plunge it
• 0:09
  and it's pulling and I'm, what is that?
• 0:11
  >> Jesse Turkington: I'm not ready.
• 0:12
  >> Hunter Hoover: And so I got the, like, strap and I'm like, that's a diaper.
• 0:15
  And I had to, like, I had to get scissors down in the
• 0:18
  s and cut the diaper apart
• 0:20
  to get it out of the s band because the inside
• 0:23
  of the diaper, the little jelly ball things that are in it
• 0:26
  just, just swell up and just filled
• 0:29
  it.
• 0:35
  Welcome back to privy. Privy is a
• 0:37
  podcast about bathrooms
• 0:40
  recorded from my home bathroom.
• 0:43
  Uh, I'm m your host, Hunter Hoover, and I love bathrooms.
• 0:46
  Uh, and I'm, I'm joined virtually, but
• 0:49
  he is in his home bathroom. I'm
• 0:52
  joined by Jesse Turkington. Jesse, how are
• 0:54
  you?
• 0:55
  >> Jesse Turkington: Hey, Hunter. Hey, listeners. I'm good. I'm glad to be
• 0:57
  here.
• 0:58
  >> Hunter Hoover: So I'm going to just share briefly up at the front and then I'm going to let
• 1:01
  Jesse kind of share who he is. But, uh,
• 1:04
  this is kind of a weird format for Jesse and I.
• 1:07
  Jesse and I are very used to
• 1:10
  recording podcasts together, um,
• 1:12
  because we are working on a project
• 1:16
  called, uh, pickled parables via parable
• 1:19
  ministries. And Jesse will share a little bit about that later. Um,
• 1:22
  but once a month, we sit down and we do this.
• 1:25
  Uh, but the conversation is a little more serious
• 1:28
  and, uh, it's a little
• 1:31
  more important just to be 100% honest. But
• 1:33
  I really appreciate you, Jesse. Um, and you really
• 1:36
  went for it. You are in a, uh,
• 1:39
  I was commenting before the record, that
• 1:42
  lighthouse picture in the background is
• 1:46
  phenomenal. So, um,
• 1:48
  yeah, he's in his bathroom, which
• 1:51
  is, uh, uh, he leveled it up.
• 1:54
  That, that's, uh, that's a, that's initiative right there.
• 1:57
  But, um, um, Jesse, feel free to share
• 2:00
  a little bit about who you are. And you can
• 2:03
  share your deepest, darkest secrets
• 2:05
  all the way or as little as. Hi, I'm
• 2:08
  Jesse. Uh, I'm wearing a black shirt
• 2:11
  today.
• 2:12
  >> Jesse Turkington: Got it. Okay, sure. Yeah, I'm, I'm
• 2:15
  Jesse. I'm currently in my parents
• 2:17
  bathroom, which is decorated and designed
• 2:20
  to be like a beach with a lot of
• 2:22
  lighthouses and
• 2:25
  it's like yellowy room. If you, for
• 2:28
  those listening, I'm just trying to paint a picture for you. So you can
• 2:31
  imagine here with us, maybe
• 2:34
  you're, maybe you're in your bathroom and you're
• 2:37
  just hanging out with, with hunter and I here.
• 2:40
  >> Hunter Hoover: Yeah.
• 2:40
  >> Jesse Turkington: So the, the vibe in mind right now
• 2:43
  is lighthouses, uh, ships,
• 2:46
  and boats. An alligator head over in the
• 2:48
  corner.
• 2:49
  >> Hunter Hoover: What?
• 2:50
  >> Jesse Turkington: A stained glass window hanging
• 2:53
  above my window. It's very.
• 2:55
  >> Hunter Hoover: You got out. You got. There's an alligator head
• 2:58
  in this bathroom straight from Florida.
• 3:00
  >> Jesse Turkington: It's, like, kind of taxidermied, but super, super
• 3:03
  hardened.
• 3:04
  >> Hunter Hoover: Oh, no, no. I know the type. My dad's from Florida,
• 3:07
  and so, like, I'm very aware of
• 3:10
  that exact vibe.
• 3:12
  >> Jesse Turkington: Um, yeah, it's a baby guy. Yeah.
• 3:14
  >> Hunter Hoover: Okay.
• 3:15
  >> Jesse Turkington: Yeah.
• 3:15
  >> Hunter Hoover: Hey, but still, man. Oh,
• 3:18
  I might pitch to Anna an
• 3:21
  alligator head right between our mirrors
• 3:24
  in our bathroom here because there's a blank wall space.
• 3:27
  Um. Ooh, man, that's
• 3:30
  awesome.
• 3:31
  >> Jesse Turkington: Yeah. Anyhow, so that's where I'm at right now.
• 3:34
  Um, what I do for a living, I serve as
• 3:37
  the executive director of a bible teaching
• 3:40
  nonprofit called Parable ministries. And
• 3:43
  Parable ministries is kind of a passion
• 3:46
  project for me. It just started out as a little
• 3:49
  podcast called Pickled Parables,
• 3:51
  uh, in 2020, I believe. And
• 3:54
  from there, it grew with
• 3:57
  partnering with other Bible teachers. Uh,
• 4:00
  getting Hunter involved, getting him on the boat, was fun,
• 4:04
  and then it grew to several. We're up to three
• 4:06
  podcasts now, and we have a full website,
• 4:10
  different social spaces, and it's a. Ah,
• 4:12
  it's a dream come true for me. I love it. It's. It's something I would
• 4:15
  love to do forever. So I focus
• 4:18
  a lot of my time on parable, uh,
• 4:21
  ministries today, I just finished recording through the
• 4:24
  gospel of Mark. Uh, that. That's something.
• 4:27
  That's project number two that I'm juggling.
• 4:30
  I do that for a podcast called my Dusty
• 4:32
  Bible. And that's a podcast about
• 4:35
  reading a. Through the book of the Bible or reading through
• 4:38
  the books of the Bible one episode at a
• 4:41
  time. Each episode is a full chunk, a
• 4:44
  full book of the Bible. So, next up
• 4:47
  was the gospel of Mark, and I just finished recording
• 4:50
  that today. So now I get to take that
• 4:53
  raw audio and
• 4:55
  slap it down like a slab of meat and just start
• 4:58
  cutting away at the pieces and splicing it together
• 5:01
  and making it sound pretty.
• 5:03
  >> Hunter Hoover: He gets to edit for hours.
• 5:06
  Yeah, it's. It's
• 5:09
  Jesse. That just to give listener, if you're.
• 5:12
  Just want to say this, if you're listening to this
• 5:14
  podcast, enjoyer, uh, I actually
• 5:17
  timed. So an episode of
• 5:20
  privy is normally between 30 and 30 minutes in an hour.
• 5:23
  And I timed it to, like, write
• 5:26
  for, uh, a, uh, regular episode,
• 5:29
  to write it, record it, and edit it. It's about three to 4
• 5:32
  hours, and that produces like 40 minutes.
• 5:35
  And so I can't imagine
• 5:38
  the amount of just man
• 5:40
  power and time that you're like. You
• 5:43
  are really going for it. Um,
• 5:46
  recording these books of the bible, that
• 5:49
  the finished product is sometimes two to four.
• 5:52
  Sometimes I think one isn't. Was when
• 5:55
  you did Genesis, was it almost 5 hours? Was it
• 5:58
  pushing it?
• 5:59
  >> Jesse Turkington: Uh, it was big, I remember.
• 6:03
  So I started out with Genesis in a different
• 6:06
  translation, and we switched translations.
• 6:09
  We got a. We got to deal with Tyndale to read it in the new
• 6:12
  living translation.
• 6:13
  >> Hunter Hoover: Shout out to Tyndale.
• 6:15
  >> Jesse Turkington: When I did that, we
• 6:18
  started at the back of the bible, and we're now
• 6:21
  working our way forward. So we went
• 6:24
  to revelation, and we're going back to
• 6:27
  Genesis now. So I did Genesis a long
• 6:30
  time ago. I don't remember the. The finished
• 6:32
  product time, but I know that the raw
• 6:35
  audio time of recording was about 8 hours.
• 6:39
  >> Hunter Hoover: That's wild. Um, that's a.
• 6:42
  That's a. That. That file
• 6:45
  will make your computer spin.
• 6:47
  >> Jesse Turkington: Yes. Wow. Yeah.
• 6:50
  Uh, for Mark,
• 6:53
  which is the smallest of the gospels,
• 6:56
  uh, that took about three days or about two
• 6:59
  and a half days for me to record.
• 7:01
  >> Hunter Hoover: That's wild. Um, so I
• 7:04
  have one question about these long record times.
• 7:07
  How often do you stop for, like, a bathroom break in
• 7:10
  there or you just, like, soldiering through?
• 7:12
  >> Jesse Turkington: No, no. I, um.
• 7:15
  So I play a game with myself when I
• 7:18
  have to record because I get so depressed sometimes when I see all
• 7:21
  the. All the, like, pages
• 7:24
  I have left. I'll, uh, do
• 7:28
  five, uh, chapters, sometimes four,
• 7:31
  and I take a break. And then I'll, uh. So
• 7:33
  I'll take a break. I'll go. I'll do a couple squats.
• 7:36
  I walk around the room, I'll cry, and I'll pray,
• 7:39
  and I'll say, God, this is horrible. And
• 7:42
  then this is a little peek
• 7:45
  behind the curtain, and then, yeah, and then I'll go use the restroom if
• 7:48
  I need to, and then I'll come back
• 7:51
  and do five more. And then that's.
• 7:54
  That's the goal with. With Mark. I modified
• 7:57
  it because there's 16 chapters in mark,
• 8:00
  and so I did four chapters.
• 8:03
  So that would try to do like.
• 8:04
  >> Hunter Hoover: Yeah, four, four.
• 8:05
  >> Jesse Turkington: Uh, and then I could do that, which is four
• 8:08
  times. And sometimes it works,
• 8:11
  sometimes it doesn't. Like the first day, I got
• 8:14
  through eight chapters easily,
• 8:16
  and then the next day, I just
• 8:19
  had such a hard time getting through five
• 8:22
  chapters. I got through four and a half,
• 8:25
  essentially, and I hit a wall
• 8:27
  where. So reading and
• 8:30
  enunciating is kind of hard for me, uh, I'll
• 8:33
  be honest. Like, I had a speech impediment as a kid,
• 8:36
  and I went to speech therapy. I had to learn how to say
• 8:39
  l, r's and s's.
• 8:42
  And so when I start reading and talking a
• 8:45
  lot, uh, I slip up. And
• 8:48
  then the old sounds I
• 8:50
  used for those, uh, l, r, and
• 8:53
  s would come through. And so that
• 8:56
  creates frustration for me because it's like, oh, I'm
• 8:59
  like, I'm not getting the sounds
• 9:02
  right. And so when I'm reading for such
• 9:04
  long periods of time, that that will come through
• 9:07
  a lot near the end. And so I have to
• 9:10
  pace myself. It's like my tongue muscle
• 9:13
  gets tired or something, and I have to stop.
• 9:16
  So I hit a wall on, uh, my second
• 9:19
  day, and I just couldn't keep, I just couldn't get
• 9:21
  through that last chapter.
• 9:24
  So stopped early and then
• 9:27
  went back this morning and cranked it out till
• 9:29
  noon.
• 9:30
  >> Hunter Hoover: Wow, man.
• 9:33
  That's, I, yeah. I did not know that. That's, um,
• 9:35
  um, no props for you for,
• 9:38
  like, taking on that endeavor. And I
• 9:41
  imagine, you know, that
• 9:43
  it's, it's one of those things
• 9:46
  where it's, I don't know. You can correct me, but it's probably, it
• 9:49
  strikes right when you're like, I just need to,
• 9:52
  yeah, this is, I need to get this. And it, that's usually when it
• 9:55
  hits, um.
• 9:57
  >> Jesse Turkington: Yeah.
• 9:57
  >> Hunter Hoover: Mandy. Wow. Um,
• 10:00
  and the other thing. And you can later
• 10:03
  on if you're like, yeah, you know, we don't need to. But correct
• 10:06
  me if I'm wrong, you said you recorded,
• 10:09
  um, one book of, uh, episode, ah.
• 10:12
  Of my dusty Bible in a bathroom. Is that
• 10:15
  correct?
• 10:15
  >> Jesse Turkington: Yeah, I did, um, the book of Romans.
• 10:18
  So anyone listening right now, if you're a big
• 10:21
  fan of bathrooms, the
• 10:24
  episode Romans of my dusty Bible was
• 10:26
  recorded in a bathroom.
• 10:28
  >> Hunter Hoover: And it's, I'm gonna tell you, Jesse,
• 10:31
  it's actually very fitting that you did Romans from a bathroom
• 10:34
  because, as well
• 10:37
  as, like, so this show has kind of taken
• 10:40
  on, like, me just really getting
• 10:44
  farther into the Internet than I want sometimes.
• 10:47
  But so much of bathroom just
• 10:50
  things goes back to Rome. Rome, uh,
• 10:53
  or France. Search me. But, like, France
• 10:56
  has had their hand on the ball more times than, than
• 10:59
  not. But, but ancient
• 11:02
  Rome, it, like, the amount of things
• 11:04
  that they tried or did that we
• 11:07
  have just kind of updated and played on. So
• 11:10
  it's, it's very fitting that, that you
• 11:13
  did romans from a bathroom because, yeah,
• 11:16
  they have a rich bathroom history.
• 11:18
  >> Jesse Turkington: Wow.
• 11:19
  >> Hunter Hoover: Yeah. Um, yeah, well, so, Jesse,
• 11:22
  I. The way that the show usually goes is I have
• 11:25
  a series of questions that I ask everybody.
• 11:27
  Um, and as we go through
• 11:30
  a lot of times, what happens is if people hear a
• 11:33
  question and they'll be like, you know, I guess I kind
• 11:36
  of have a thing that I could talk about there. Feel free
• 11:39
  to stop me anytime you want. And so I'll
• 11:42
  start by, do you have anything off the top of your head that you
• 11:45
  want to share? It can be a bathroom story. It can be
• 11:48
  as simple as, like, yeah, this
• 11:51
  one time I went into the bathroom and some,
• 11:53
  I heard a guy struggling for his life.
• 11:56
  Anything.
• 12:01
  >> Jesse Turkington: Uh, I really don't have any great, uh,
• 12:04
  bathroom stories. I have a question
• 12:06
  that, uh, as
• 12:10
  I guess, the official bathroom guy that
• 12:12
  I want to ask you. Uh,
• 12:15
  I don't know. And so maybe, you know.
• 12:18
  >> Hunter Hoover: Yeah.
• 12:19
  >> Jesse Turkington: But for scuba divers, when they go scuba
• 12:22
  diving, how, how
• 12:25
  far do you think, like, water pressure.
• 12:28
  How far do you think they have to go before they can't poop?
• 12:31
  >> Hunter Hoover: Before they're, they're unable?
• 12:33
  >> Jesse Turkington: Yeah. Like, the war, the pressure, um, is pushing
• 12:36
  in. Is it pretty far?
• 12:38
  >> Hunter Hoover: I don't know. See,
• 12:40
  so, like I said, I just recorded an
• 12:43
  episode and, and during that episode, um,
• 12:46
  and yours and theirs will come out about a month
• 12:48
  apartheid. Um, but in that episode, this
• 12:51
  person's like, yeah, uh, I saw on Facebook that
• 12:54
  people eat steak in the shower. And I'm like,
• 12:57
  not, yeah, exactly. But, jesse,
• 12:59
  the question that you've just asked is how far down does
• 13:02
  scuba have to go before you just can't
• 13:05
  poop? I know there's an
• 13:08
  answer and I will be looking into it.
• 13:10
  >> Jesse Turkington: Um, also, part two to that question.
• 13:13
  >> Hunter Hoover: Yeah.
• 13:14
  >> Jesse Turkington: How do they poop? Because, well,
• 13:17
  you got, you, you can't go up fast because with
• 13:20
  the pressure system, you, you have to go up
• 13:22
  certain levels and let your body adapt to
• 13:25
  the different pressure.
• 13:27
  >> Hunter Hoover: Yeah.
• 13:27
  >> Jesse Turkington: And then move. So if you gotta go, you
• 13:30
  can't just, like, swim up to the top.
• 13:33
  >> Hunter Hoover: I, so
• 13:35
  my hunch is they just
• 13:38
  go, oh, okay. Because,
• 13:41
  so, uh, bike,
• 13:44
  like, professional cyclists, like marathon long
• 13:47
  distance cyclists and long distance runners.
• 13:50
  Yeah, they, they have, they have porta
• 13:52
  potties, but often the amount
• 13:55
  of time that they can shave
• 13:59
  by not stopping, getting off their bike using the porta
• 14:02
  potty, um, if they're, if they're far
• 14:05
  enough into the race that,
• 14:07
  like, I, so I have, I've talked to, I
• 14:10
  haven't had him on the show, but I've talked to a guy at the high school who.
• 14:13
  Right. Who cycles, but he also does, like, cross country
• 14:16
  type. And he told me, like, yeah, it's a thing. And the
• 14:19
  calculation is how much
• 14:21
  more racing do I have
• 14:24
  to? Where if I stop, will I lose or will
• 14:27
  it cost me my time? But if I don't stop, will
• 14:30
  the chafing that results
• 14:33
  in just doing it into your
• 14:35
  pants, will that also set me
• 14:38
  back to the point where I will lose time? And
• 14:41
  that's the calculation. Um, um. But there's like people
• 14:44
  that. Yeah, I just go, I just let it fly while I run or,
• 14:46
  or, um, um. And a lot of people, um, um. It
• 14:49
  might be similar to scuba, but for different, like
• 14:52
  scuba might be a pressure problem where you just
• 14:55
  can't, like you're, you're in. Cause a lot of people
• 14:58
  when they're running, their, their blood is,
• 15:01
  is pumping to their extremities and stuff to keep
• 15:03
  like you alive while you do that, that
• 15:07
  they can't poop. Like it. Sometimes they'll even be
• 15:09
  constipated days after. It's um, like
• 15:12
  runners poop. Yeah, it's. Oh, yeah,
• 15:15
  it's so my. I'm wondering if it's something similar with
• 15:18
  scuba where the.
• 15:20
  Yeah, the exterior effects on your body shut things down.
• 15:24
  I will be looking into it.
• 15:25
  >> Jesse Turkington: Um. Okay. Yeah,
• 15:27
  man. Wow.
• 15:30
  >> Hunter Hoover: Do you scuba? Have you ever had, do.
• 15:32
  >> Jesse Turkington: I know, I know I haven't scuba. I like
• 15:35
  snorkeling, but, uh, scuba, like
• 15:37
  I once looked into becoming an
• 15:40
  underwater welder for like an oil rig.
• 15:43
  And it was something, I was like.
• 15:46
  >> Hunter Hoover: I could do that.
• 15:47
  >> Jesse Turkington: I mean, it's a
• 15:50
  dangerous job. It was on, um,
• 15:52
  different situations. And I have a friend who did
• 15:55
  it and he just has such incredible stories of. Yeah.
• 15:58
  >> Hunter Hoover: Ah.
• 15:58
  >> Jesse Turkington: Being under the deep, deep dark blue and,
• 16:01
  and just wild things.
• 16:04
  >> Hunter Hoover: Yeah, yeah, it's dangerous. But my
• 16:06
  understanding is it pays like woofy. I
• 16:09
  mean, it's like money.
• 16:11
  >> Jesse Turkington: My, my buddy who did it worked
• 16:14
  for a handful of years, got out of it, bought
• 16:17
  houses, and that's what he does now.
• 16:19
  >> Hunter Hoover: Oh, classic real estate.
• 16:23
  Um. Yeah, I,
• 16:27
  I know there's so much money in real estate, I just.
• 16:31
  >> Jesse Turkington: The.
• 16:32
  >> Hunter Hoover: You have to either hire the upkeep and. Yeah, I.
• 16:34
  Anyway.
• 16:35
  >> Jesse Turkington: Mm hmm.
• 16:36
  >> Hunter Hoover: I, I've looked at it cuz my, I
• 16:39
  got so many friends and people that are like, we're realtors or we're
• 16:42
  real estate agents, which apparently is a different thing. I don't
• 16:45
  know.
• 16:45
  >> Jesse Turkington: Okay.
• 16:45
  >> Hunter Hoover: Um. I think it's a licensing thing. Like
• 16:48
  one of them is like maybe they cut some corners
• 16:51
  and uh, it's like black market realtor
• 16:54
  type thing. I don't know. But yeah, there's,
• 16:57
  there's real estate agent and realtor are different.
• 17:00
  And it's like your
• 17:02
  licensing and. Yeah. You're
• 17:05
  brokering. I'd have to ask.
• 17:08
  I have a, I have a co worker at the high school. Her
• 17:10
  husband is the legit one.
• 17:13
  And she has told me multiple times she'll
• 17:16
  rant about how. Oh, so, and so they're not,
• 17:19
  they're just, um, they're just the, I don't remember which one's which, but they're just the
• 17:22
  other one because they don't actually do it and they're taking all the
• 17:24
  business. But people are, you know, they get
• 17:27
  hosed when they go to close because
• 17:30
  they, all these licensing are weird. Then you have to pay this third
• 17:33
  party to help you license. And it's like, oh, man, I
• 17:36
  see that. I want nothing to do with that.
• 17:38
  Um, I don't like to, I don't like
• 17:41
  bookkeeping or numbers or money.
• 17:44
  And I'm just like,
• 17:47
  go away with it. Uh, well, yeah,
• 17:50
  so that's a
• 17:52
  good question. The, under the scuba,
• 17:55
  um, yeah, because when you're
• 17:58
  in a submarine, they like counteract the pressure. I was trying to
• 18:01
  think of submarining stuff, but I
• 18:04
  know that they pressurize it so that way you
• 18:07
  don't feel the effects of the outside. So, yeah,
• 18:10
  I'd be interested, um, or I wonder if
• 18:12
  this is the dark side. I wonder, I think you would
• 18:15
  go so far down that you would just not be able to hold it. I wonder
• 18:18
  if that's the case where it's just like interesting.
• 18:21
  >> Jesse Turkington: So you like wear a diaper type of thing?
• 18:23
  >> Hunter Hoover: Yeah. Or just let nature just, you know,
• 18:26
  void it straight into the ocean.
• 18:28
  >> Jesse Turkington: Um, oh, like a little trap door, like, like
• 18:31
  those big onesies where you like, I just think when
• 18:34
  there's, I.
• 18:35
  >> Hunter Hoover: Think when there's that much water, I think it's just going to rinse
• 18:37
  itself right through the,
• 18:40
  I didn't even think of that. I don't even know. Yeah,
• 18:43
  I, there's, I'm going to be doing some research
• 18:46
  now. Future topic
• 18:49
  pending.
• 18:50
  >> Jesse Turkington: Um, okay.
• 18:51
  >> Hunter Hoover: No, that's funny. So first question for you,
• 18:54
  Jesse, is what type of toilet paper
• 18:56
  do you use? Um, or do you
• 18:59
  prefer, do you have, do you have a
• 19:01
  preference?
• 19:02
  >> Jesse Turkington: I do have preference of what I don't like, but I don't have a
• 19:05
  preference of what I like, need
• 19:08
  type of thing. So when I would buy
• 19:11
  toilet paper, I would avoid the single
• 19:14
  sheets because they would just disintegrate when I looked at them.
• 19:16
  >> Hunter Hoover: Yeah. Yeah.
• 19:17
  >> Jesse Turkington: Um, and whenever I see
• 19:20
  them in a, in a public restroom. My
• 19:22
  heart gets really sad for a little bit,
• 19:25
  and it's like, oh, no.
• 19:28
  But for. For other kinds.
• 19:31
  I don't like the super thick kind.
• 19:34
  >> Hunter Hoover: Okay.
• 19:35
  >> Jesse Turkington: Because it always tricks me out because, I'll be honest,
• 19:38
  I bounce around a lot of
• 19:40
  places, so I'm pretty
• 19:43
  used to the single sheet. But, um,
• 19:46
  when I get to the thick kind, I'm
• 19:49
  used to taking a lot. Yeah, because
• 19:52
  of the single. But with the. With the big stuff, you don't need a
• 19:55
  lot. You need. You need, like, one square,
• 19:58
  and then you can clog the
• 20:01
  toilet with that big stuff, um, because you're used to the little
• 20:04
  stuff. So I I don't like that going from the small to the
• 20:07
  big stuff. If I could just take that medium Costco stuff,
• 20:10
  you know, that that's really. Yes, that's what I need.
• 20:12
  >> Hunter Hoover: That's. I. So
• 20:15
  I have. I have asked, like, 30 people this question,
• 20:18
  and
• 20:22
  I've had a handful of people say, yeah, I like Costco. But then
• 20:25
  when I'm like, yeah, I use Costco. That's, like, all. I use
• 20:27
  everybody. I have not found a single person that has a
• 20:30
  grievance against Costco toilet paper. It's
• 20:33
  nobody's first choice. Like, nobody. Very few people are
• 20:36
  like, yeah, I choose Costco above all else, but
• 20:39
  everybody's like, yeah, I get it. Like,
• 20:42
  it's cheaper. It's not so paper
• 20:45
  thin. Um, yeah, I
• 20:47
  want the public school district that I work for to atone for
• 20:50
  their sins, because, um, they. They
• 20:53
  have by far the lowest quality toilet
• 20:56
  paper.
• 20:57
  >> Jesse Turkington: Um.
• 20:57
  >> Hunter Hoover: Um, that. That can be bought. Uh, uh,
• 21:00
  it is truly. It is truly a
• 21:03
  crime.
• 21:04
  >> Jesse Turkington: Um.
• 21:04
  >> Hunter Hoover: Um, to the point where, uh, like, there have been
• 21:07
  times we go into the men's bathroom, the staff bathroom, and there is just.
• 21:09
  Somebody has brought their home roll and just
• 21:12
  stuck the home roll in the back, and I've. And I've
• 21:15
  gone for it. I'm like, listen, you left it in here for me. If
• 21:18
  you didn't want me to partake, you should have taken it
• 21:21
  back to your classroom. Um, but, yeah, it's.
• 21:24
  It's a terrible, terrible thing. I,
• 21:26
  uh. Yeah, it's baffling, but,
• 21:29
  uh. Okay, so you're. You're kind of. You're kind of toilet paper
• 21:32
  agnostic. Uh,
• 21:35
  I agree that there's nothing worse in this world. Well, there
• 21:38
  is some things where there's a lot of things worse in this world,
• 21:40
  but, um. But in the bathroom
• 21:43
  that when you go to. When you go to wipe, and if it's just. It's just
• 21:46
  crass, but when the toilet paper so thin that your
• 21:49
  finger goes through you
• 21:52
  that I, like, I get so
• 21:55
  quiet and just kind of, like, introspectively
• 21:58
  frustrated whenever that I'm faced with.
• 22:01
  >> Jesse Turkington: That, because it's the sadness, it's the
• 22:03
  overwhelming sadness. It's a pit of despair.
• 22:07
  >> Hunter Hoover: We have robots that are trying to replicate everybody's everything,
• 22:10
  and we can't figure out how to, like, both make
• 22:13
  the paper thin and eco friendly and not
• 22:15
  rip immediately. Like, we've got to be able to.
• 22:18
  Um, when you're. When your toilet paper's on the roll, is
• 22:21
  your. Is your toilet paper folding over, or
• 22:24
  is it an under? Are you an over?
• 22:25
  >> Jesse Turkington: No. No. I have pretty strong feelings about this
• 22:28
  at houses. I flip it when I.
• 22:31
  >> Hunter Hoover: You do? Oh, my goodness. Oh, boy.
• 22:33
  >> Jesse Turkington: Uh, it's the over. Unless they have
• 22:36
  cats.
• 22:38
  >> Hunter Hoover: Oh, my gosh. Jesse. Okay.
• 22:40
  >> Jesse Turkington: All right.
• 22:41
  >> Hunter Hoover: So you are. You are not the first to bring
• 22:43
  up the cats as a problem, and I am
• 22:47
  convinced that the cats are going to get it no matter
• 22:49
  what. No, I don't have cats. I don't have cats. So I don't
• 22:52
  know. Um, and I'm. I'm
• 22:55
  kind of cat agnostic and that
• 22:58
  I'm not convinced that they exist or
• 23:01
  should exist. No, no,
• 23:04
  I would never harm a cat, but I would also never own
• 23:07
  one. Um, that's fair. So you.
• 23:10
  So you will flip it. If you go to someone's home, you'll flip it
• 23:13
  around? Huh? Huh?
• 23:13
  >> Jesse Turkington: M unless I know that they have an indoor cat, then I'll leave. That. That's
• 23:16
  my, that's my condition. That's my grace to them.
• 23:19
  >> Hunter Hoover: Oh. So I.
• 23:22
  So you and Anna are in agreement? Because Anna is, like, it
• 23:25
  must go over. Every other configuration is
• 23:28
  bad. Um, I do not believe that it
• 23:31
  matters. In fact, I have a
• 23:34
  conspiracy theory that I'm, I'm
• 23:37
  doing a lot of research on. It's a. Ah, it's like one of those
• 23:40
  episodes that will land probably somewhere 2025,
• 23:41
  2026, because I'm trying to, like, build
• 23:44
  it,
• 23:47
  but. But just sneak peek on. I'm
• 23:49
  convinced that the man who designed toilet paper
• 23:53
  had everybody do flip over so
• 23:56
  he would sell more toilet. Like, I'm confident that there's
• 23:59
  a marketing. Like, there's a piece of marketing to sell more
• 24:02
  toilet paper. Um, um, I can't. I haven't been able to
• 24:05
  prove it yet. I'm working on it. Uh, uh, but
• 24:09
  I don't care. Like, my opinion is, if I get it on
• 24:12
  the roll, I have succeeded as a human.
• 24:14
  >> Jesse Turkington: Uh, uh, halfway there.
• 24:17
  Yeah.
• 24:17
  >> Hunter Hoover: Yeah.
• 24:20
  I think it's very bold that you change it, though, because
• 24:23
  I would never notice. Like, if, if you came to our house and I had put
• 24:26
  it on, quote unquote, the wrong way,
• 24:30
  um, and you flipped it, I would never know. In
• 24:32
  fact, I'm confident that Anna flips ours, and
• 24:35
  I don't even notice
• 24:38
  because I'm like, yeah, it's on there. I'm actually,
• 24:41
  sometimes I won't even put it on. I'll just set it on top
• 24:44
  and just, like, put it, oh, sure. It's not even on
• 24:47
  the roll. Like, I don't have time for
• 24:50
  that.
• 24:50
  >> Jesse Turkington: Uh, I mean, sometimes when you're getting really low,
• 24:54
  uh, and you, you get a more
• 24:56
  full or fuller roll and you put that on, then you just
• 24:59
  leave the other one around so you can use it up. Right?
• 25:02
  >> Hunter Hoover: Yes. Well, in Charmin sells a roll
• 25:04
  extender now, so you can actually, like, get a little more space
• 25:08
  in between the wall and your roll. I, um, don't,
• 25:11
  I don't own one. I am, I'm looking into it because
• 25:14
  Costco, their roll, when it's full,
• 25:17
  is, like, just too tight against the wall.
• 25:19
  >> Jesse Turkington: It is pretty big. You know, I never noticed, but in this
• 25:21
  bathroom I'm in, it's got a pretty deep cavity for
• 25:24
  that, that rule to just sit in there.
• 25:26
  >> Hunter Hoover: Does it kind of regress into the wall?
• 25:28
  >> Jesse Turkington: It does regress.
• 25:29
  >> Hunter Hoover: Oh, those are, that's a premium job. Um,
• 25:31
  whoever. Yeah. You don't see that
• 25:34
  often. That is, that's actually,
• 25:37
  like, that's a rarity to see
• 25:40
  nowadays.
• 25:40
  >> Jesse Turkington: I'll take a picture. I'll send it to you.
• 25:42
  >> Hunter Hoover: Oh, yeah, yeah. I'm gonna, there's a lot in this bathroom
• 25:45
  that I want pictures of. A, uh, sentence
• 25:48
  that will be taken out of context at
• 25:51
  some point in my life. Um,
• 25:54
  Jesse, you've already kind of spoken to
• 25:57
  it, but so you're, it really depends on the
• 25:59
  sheet. But how many sheets, when you go for the
• 26:02
  job, how many sheets would you say is,
• 26:05
  like, this is the perfect number of squares that I'm getting
• 26:08
  on. Getting on.
• 26:09
  >> Jesse Turkington: It's a good thing I'm in a bathroom because I'm a visual guy. So we
• 26:12
  got one, two, three. Let's, let's
• 26:15
  say four.
• 26:16
  >> Hunter Hoover: Four. It's acceptable.
• 26:18
  >> Jesse Turkington: Yeah, I'm holding up to the, to the camera right now, and I think that's
• 26:20
  a. Yeah, I fold it. I
• 26:23
  like to fold my paper.
• 26:25
  >> Hunter Hoover: Oh, praise, praise be to heat. Because there's,
• 26:27
  there's these people. There's these crumple people in
• 26:30
  the world.
• 26:34
  You've ever met. You've ever. Okay. I don't
• 26:36
  know under what context you would ever see somebody
• 26:39
  wiping,
• 26:41
  but there are
• 26:44
  people that crumple their toilet paper to wipe.
• 26:48
  And I can only understand, like, it's like
• 26:51
  this.
• 26:52
  >> Jesse Turkington: Ooh, like a.
• 26:55
  Yep. Like what you're trying to do when you use a tissue to blow
• 26:58
  your nose.
• 26:58
  >> Hunter Hoover: And, yeah, to me, it looks like they have just caught a
• 27:01
  spider and have, like, crumpled this up.
• 27:04
  But now, instead of throwing it away.
• 27:07
  >> Jesse Turkington: Multi use.
• 27:07
  >> Hunter Hoover: Yeah, right back for it. And,
• 27:10
  uh, as I love, I love my boy,
• 27:13
  but my boy has somehow figured out how to be a
• 27:16
  crumpler. Despite neither
• 27:19
  of his parents have taught him this. I don't know where
• 27:21
  this method came from. Um
• 27:24
  hm. I have tried to correct the course and he's like, no,
• 27:27
  dad, this is better. And I'm like,
• 27:29
  how? It's an indefensible
• 27:32
  position, son.
• 27:34
  >> Jesse Turkington: Um, you know, you just sparked and I had a, ah,
• 27:36
  thought in my mind, uh, when we
• 27:39
  were talking about the crumples. I think I said the word tissue
• 27:42
  paper. I'm a big fan. If I don't,
• 27:45
  if I don't have access to, uh, oh, yeah.
• 27:48
  Nice toilet paper. I'm a big fan of
• 27:51
  using, uh, my kleenex or tissue paper
• 27:54
  hundred percent because it's, it's so, it's so
• 27:56
  soft.
• 27:57
  >> Hunter Hoover: Well, in, it's. I'll probably get canceled,
• 28:00
  but it's flushable. I.
• 28:04
  Kleenex, is it not puffs? I thought
• 28:07
  so.
• 28:07
  >> Jesse Turkington: I thought so.
• 28:08
  >> Hunter Hoover: Because whenever, like, allergy season, we're at the tail end of allergy
• 28:11
  season. Thank, thank the Lord. Um,
• 28:14
  but when it's in the throes of allergy season,
• 28:17
  I am blowing my nose so often
• 28:20
  that it goes in the toilet because I'm filling
• 28:23
  a trash. If I'm. And yeah, I'll do
• 28:26
  spear four in there and then hit the flusher. I'm
• 28:29
  hoping it's, yeah, I never heard.
• 28:31
  >> Jesse Turkington: Of them not, uh, being
• 28:34
  this, this says kleenex 100
• 28:37
  years. I feel like they've had plenty of time to
• 28:40
  figure out, but I'm wondering.
• 28:42
  >> Hunter Hoover: So I think, jesse, my concern is not,
• 28:45
  I'm pretty confident it's flushable. The question is,
• 28:48
  is it flushable in the sense of, like, how they have the dude
• 28:50
  wipes that they say are flushable, but they're not. Like,
• 28:54
  they do get stuck in the, in the works or, like,
• 28:56
  really.
• 28:57
  >> Jesse Turkington: I've never used it.
• 28:58
  >> Hunter Hoover: Oh, it's, it's, it's kind of a
• 29:01
  premium experience. But, yeah, don't, you're not
• 29:04
  supposed to flush them. It says flushable. But, like,
• 29:07
  if you ask, like, plumbers or, um,
• 29:10
  even, like, if you talk to people that have used
• 29:13
  them and they have their own plumbing problems, they're
• 29:16
  had. They're like, yeah, don't flush these, uh, feminine hygiene products, same
• 29:19
  thing. You're not supposed to flush those.
• 29:20
  >> Jesse Turkington: I see many signs for that. And, yeah, over my
• 29:23
  years, yeah, dude.
• 29:25
  >> Hunter Hoover: When I worked as a janitor in Salem, somebody flushed
• 29:27
  a diaper, like a chilled.
• 29:29
  >> Jesse Turkington: No, yeah, but that doesn't even make sense, though.
• 29:32
  >> Hunter Hoover: Yeah, people didn't do a lot that
• 29:35
  made sense where. But I was
• 29:38
  the janitor, so I went in and I, the toilet is
• 29:40
  just plugged.
• 29:42
  >> Jesse Turkington: And, uh.
• 29:42
  >> Hunter Hoover: What in the world? And I kind of started
• 29:45
  to plunge it, and it's pulling, and I'm, what is
• 29:48
  that?
• 29:48
  >> Jesse Turkington: I'm not ready.
• 29:49
  >> Hunter Hoover: And so I got the, like, strap, and I'm like, that's a diaper.
• 29:52
  And I had to, like, I had to get scissors down in the
• 29:55
  s and cut the diaper apart
• 29:57
  to get it out of the s band because the inside
• 30:00
  of the diaper, the little jelly ball things that are in it
• 30:03
  just, just, and just filled
• 30:06
  it. And I'm like, this is madness.
• 30:10
  Like, there's a trash can. I get that it stinks.
• 30:12
  But this is, this can't be better.
• 30:15
  Um, yet, I've learned a lot that people, when it
• 30:18
  comes to bathroom common sense, many people do not have
• 30:21
  it.
• 30:22
  >> Jesse Turkington: Um, this is a needed podcast.
• 30:24
  We need to have this etiquette.
• 30:28
  >> Hunter Hoover: Jesse. I have so many just dumb
• 30:32
  stories.
• 30:33
  >> Jesse Turkington: Uh.
• 30:35
  >> Hunter Hoover: Yeah. Um,
• 30:38
  and you can interpret this however you want, hand washing
• 30:41
  or showering. Um, but are you a bar soap or a
• 30:43
  liquid soap guy?
• 30:45
  >> Jesse Turkington: Ooh, wow. What a way to
• 30:47
  phrase that. Yeah. I think for hand
• 30:50
  washing, I prefer liquid.
• 30:52
  >> Hunter Hoover: Okay.
• 30:53
  >> Jesse Turkington: Uh, uh, and for the
• 30:55
  shower, I mean, I'm not opposed to, like,
• 30:58
  that dove bar, you know?
• 31:00
  >> Hunter Hoover: Yeah.
• 31:00
  >> Jesse Turkington: Or what's that green one? Lucky something. No.
• 31:03
  >> Hunter Hoover: Uh, uh, irish spring.
• 31:04
  >> Jesse Turkington: There it is. Yo. Irish springs.
• 31:06
  >> Hunter Hoover: Yep. My dad used, um, that my
• 31:09
  entire childhood. That was his bar of soap. Irish spring.
• 31:12
  Green bar. Yep.
• 31:13
  >> Jesse Turkington: Yep. I if I'm using the bar, I
• 31:16
  think I prefer that dove, that
• 31:19
  white, white dove. Uh, I
• 31:22
  found, I found this, uh,
• 31:25
  bathroom body wash I'm a big fan of. It has,
• 31:28
  like, these little sand, a little bits of sand
• 31:31
  in it, a little grit. Yeah. And, uh, it
• 31:34
  works really well for when you're out working in the yard
• 31:37
  and you get that lawn dust all over you and
• 31:40
  you got to go in to just, and it just stuck on you.
• 31:43
  That dust, it's like using that, uh, that
• 31:46
  old. Like, my dad has this
• 31:49
  special, uh, soap that has a lot of
• 31:52
  grit in it, but you're not supposed to use water with it. You just put
• 31:55
  it on your hands and you just.
• 31:58
  For minutes.
• 31:59
  >> Hunter Hoover: You don't use water with.
• 32:01
  >> Jesse Turkington: Yeah. And you. You get, like, oil. It just pulls
• 32:04
  anything off you. And so I've
• 32:07
  never.
• 32:07
  >> Hunter Hoover: I've. This is. I'm learning all sorts of
• 32:10
  stuff. Waterless. Wait,
• 32:12
  okay, I got.
• 32:14
  >> Jesse Turkington: And then you go and wash, like, you get. You
• 32:17
  wash it off when you're done spreading it everywhere, but you got to let it
• 32:20
  sit and pull things off your. Your skin.
• 32:23
  >> Hunter Hoover: That's wild. I, uh. Yeah, I will be looking into that.
• 32:26
  >> Jesse Turkington: I'll, uh, send you a picture.
• 32:29
  >> Hunter Hoover: Yeah, please do. Again, uh,
• 32:32
  this bathroom. I I might have to
• 32:34
  go make a trip.
• 32:36
  >> Jesse Turkington: No, that's the special stuff.
• 32:39
  He keeps that in the workshop. No, you don't use that
• 32:42
  just for, like, washing your hands? No.
• 32:47
  >> Hunter Hoover: Um, okay, so primarily liquid,
• 32:49
  but you'll go for bar. Yeah, every now and then.
• 32:52
  Okay. Uh, you ever. So
• 32:57
  you ever. You ever think about, like, leaving your dad a message in one
• 33:00
  of them bar soaps that he's got? Like, right. Like, carving him a little
• 33:03
  message in itheme?
• 33:04
  >> Jesse Turkington: Oh, I have not.
• 33:07
  >> Hunter Hoover: Yeah, it's thought people do that.
• 33:10
  Apparently, people will. People will carve each other messages
• 33:13
  in bar soap. I found out, and ever since I found it out,
• 33:16
  I was like, well, I'm gonna start asking people because you never know.
• 33:18
  >> Jesse Turkington: Uh, I'll be honest, I don't really like the
• 33:21
  idea of sharing my bar. Like, I've always had
• 33:24
  my bar soap.
• 33:25
  >> Hunter Hoover: Yeah. So here's one of those stories that I can
• 33:28
  share because Anna shared it publicly on the Internet
• 33:31
  two or three years back. But when. And
• 33:34
  I. I love my wife,
• 33:37
  and I had to tell her, I said, this isn't normal behavior,
• 33:39
  but when they were growing up, her and her
• 33:42
  siblings all shared a bar of soap.
• 33:45
  Like, and she is. She is the middle of
• 33:48
  seven.
• 33:49
  >> Jesse Turkington: Oh, and
• 33:51
  seven.
• 33:52
  >> Hunter Hoover: And is one of. I think it's truly one of those things where, like,
• 33:55
  if you don't know any better growing up, and that's
• 33:58
  all you like. Yeah. Like, why would you.
• 34:01
  But when she told me that, I was like,
• 34:03
  that's, that's wild. Like, didn't
• 34:06
  you ever stop and think what your brother had done with that
• 34:09
  bar of soap at any point? Like, uh, I
• 34:12
  would. I
• 34:15
  know. Like, it's me. That's my soap. Uh,
• 34:18
  yeah, I'm. I'm borderline that way with my liquid
• 34:20
  soap. I don't really like people getting into it. Um, because
• 34:23
  I'll shower. I'll shower at the church, um, during the
• 34:26
  school year, because I get up and do a little
• 34:29
  workout, and then I go to the church and shower, and then I work, and then I go to
• 34:32
  school and I leave my soap in the thing. And
• 34:35
  every now and then it'll have moved. And I'm like,
• 34:38
  oh, no. It's
• 34:41
  like, it's not that I don't like sharing. I'm
• 34:44
  afraid somebody has put something in it, like die
• 34:47
  or. I've seen so many, like, YouTube videos of.
• 34:50
  Oh, yeah, oh, yeah, dude, you
• 34:52
  put a little pull of blue, blue hair dye in
• 34:55
  there, and I'm just, I'm so sketched out that I'm gonna, like,
• 34:58
  blue my hair.
• 34:59
  >> Jesse Turkington: That's so mean.
• 35:01
  >> Hunter Hoover: Yeah.
• 35:01
  >> Jesse Turkington: Oh, yeah.
• 35:02
  >> Hunter Hoover: Now that I've said it, somebody's gonna do it and I'm gonna
• 35:05
  have blue hair. At some point. I will shave myself bald
• 35:08
  if that happens. Um, I will go baby face and
• 35:11
  bald on top if I end up with blue hair, anything.
• 35:14
  Um.
• 35:14
  >> Jesse Turkington: Man.
• 35:15
  >> Hunter Hoover: Yeah. Oh, Jesse, what's your opinion on baths? How do
• 35:18
  you feel about baths?
• 35:20
  >> Jesse Turkington: Oh, big fan. I like baths. I, uh,
• 35:23
  like Epsom salt baths.
• 35:25
  >> Hunter Hoover: Okay.
• 35:26
  >> Jesse Turkington: Um.
• 35:29
  >> Hunter Hoover: Do you ever feel when you're taking a bath that you're just, like,
• 35:31
  making soup from yourself?
• 35:35
  >> Jesse Turkington: Wow. Uh, you
• 35:37
  know, I never have thought of that before, but that's probably all I'm
• 35:40
  gonna ever think about next time I have a bath.
• 35:42
  >> Hunter Hoover: No, I ruined it.
• 35:46
  Yeah. That's. I want to be a person that
• 35:49
  likes baths.
• 35:50
  Um, I just can't. I
• 35:53
  can't get past just that. I'm
• 35:56
  like, I'm like a human teabag at that point.
• 35:58
  >> Jesse Turkington: Well, sure. I mean, yeah, of course. But
• 36:02
  it's the, it's for the
• 36:05
  achy joints and, uh, the
• 36:08
  sore, the muscle you pulled in your lower back, and you're just
• 36:11
  letting that heat just permeate and soak in
• 36:14
  there.
• 36:15
  >> Hunter Hoover: Yeah, that's probably wise. I
• 36:18
  I should probably venture down this road. Um. Um,
• 36:22
  I've found that at some
• 36:25
  point between the age of 20 and 30,
• 36:28
  everything is just like. Yeah, you might as well hurt
• 36:31
  today. Um, um. And it's fun.
• 36:34
  It's. It's really interesting. Uh,
• 36:36
  uh, I stood up. We. Oh,
• 36:38
  old man problem. Here we go. I was at the
• 36:41
  gym two weeks ago. I did a little bit
• 36:44
  of cardio, and then I sat down to do some sit ups. I did two
• 36:47
  sit ups throughout my back, and my back hurt
• 36:50
  for four days from two
• 36:53
  sit ups. Uh, so
• 36:56
  never felt older yet.
• 36:58
  >> Jesse Turkington: Yeah.
• 36:58
  >> Hunter Hoover: Um, okay, do you have, like, a bathroom? Wait, wait.
• 37:01
  Or not bathroom. Do you have, like, a bath? Not ritual,
• 37:04
  but like, a setup that you
• 37:06
  enjoy? Um, whether that's. Do you ever do, like, a drink
• 37:09
  in the bath or maybe a snack.
• 37:11
  >> Jesse Turkington: When taking a bath?
• 37:12
  >> Hunter Hoover: Yeah. Yeah.
• 37:13
  >> Jesse Turkington: Gotcha. Um,
• 37:15
  typically, uh, so I guess
• 37:18
  for just general knowledge in advance for this question.
• 37:21
  I'm a man of finding routine, and
• 37:24
  then I simplify the routine.
• 37:27
  So an example
• 37:29
  of that is, I like to make an omelet in the morning
• 37:32
  for breakfast. And I have
• 37:35
  simplified that routine to the point of I no
• 37:38
  longer break the eggs and stir it together. I
• 37:41
  just fry the eggs, and I make a fried omelet,
• 37:44
  and just, like, it still, it works.
• 37:47
  So do that with a lot of
• 37:50
  things. When I take a bath, I just get
• 37:53
  the water warm, put in some epsom salt,
• 37:55
  sit in there for a soak, and I watch a tv show.
• 37:58
  >> Hunter Hoover: Oh, uh, yeah, I imagine a tv
• 38:01
  show is about as long as you need to be in a bath, too. So that probably works out
• 38:04
  pretty well.
• 38:06
  >> Jesse Turkington: Make sure it's not, like, one of them hour long.
• 38:09
  You got to get one of them office episodes or something.
• 38:11
  >> Hunter Hoover: Yeah, see, at some point. At some point, like,
• 38:14
  Disney or some other bad person, um,
• 38:17
  like, decided we're
• 38:20
  gonna try to pass off a movie as an episode of
• 38:23
  tv several times.
• 38:25
  >> Jesse Turkington: Yeah.
• 38:25
  >> Hunter Hoover: And I don't. I am. I'm
• 38:28
  convinced that what happened was, is they shot a
• 38:31
  movie and they had all this extra
• 38:33
  material that somebody was just.
• 38:36
  So I have to keep every
• 38:39
  shot that they're like, uh, we'll just. We'll just turn it into a
• 38:42
  tv show. We'll release five episodes. It'll be great. It's
• 38:44
  like, that's. That's
• 38:47
  my. I'm full of conspiracy theories. That's. That's
• 38:50
  my conspiracy theory.
• 38:52
  >> Jesse Turkington: That's, uh, a hot take. Interesting.
• 38:53
  >> Hunter Hoover: Yeah. And while we're talking about tv, I have to take a minute
• 38:56
  and say how much I absolutely despise, um,
• 38:59
  HBO. Max. Now just.
• 39:00
  >> Jesse Turkington: Max, that
• 39:03
  rebranding is devastating.
• 39:07
  >> Hunter Hoover: They did a dirty, rotten tax break
• 39:09
  trick a couple years ago and canned a bunch of shows,
• 39:12
  and I signed up for a year at, like, a
• 39:15
  sucker. Um, and then one week later,
• 39:18
  they canned the three shows that I signed up. Uh, no
• 39:21
  joke. Like, I told Anna, I was like, oh, they have them.
• 39:24
  I can't find these three anywhere. And I signed up, and
• 39:26
  they wrote them off as a tax break a week later. And I
• 39:29
  went, oh, $120
• 39:32
  later. Can't get that money. Back.
• 39:34
  >> Jesse Turkington: So, um, you gotta wait for the Black Friday deals.
• 39:37
  They give you like, five months for, like, $3.
• 39:39
  >> Hunter Hoover: I know. It's. Yeah, I.
• 39:43
  Yeah, it. I
• 39:46
  forget now. What I need
• 39:49
  to do is I need to cancel, like, October and then re
• 39:52
  sign up in November so that way I can get back on the
• 39:54
  deal.
• 39:55
  >> Jesse Turkington: Yeah. Uh, in preparation. Yeah.
• 39:58
  >> Hunter Hoover: Yes. Um, in the bathroom. Do you
• 40:01
  ever have a snack or a drink? Whether you're on the toilet or in
• 40:04
  the shower or anything?
• 40:05
  >> Jesse Turkington: Oh, okay. There's a fun. Yeah, it started
• 40:08
  so I. I didn't do things like
• 40:11
  that, but I. So in high
• 40:13
  school, this is a. It's kind
• 40:16
  of a sad story, but also kind of an interesting one at the same
• 40:19
  time. I, uh. Uh, I got food
• 40:22
  poisoning from buffalo wild wings
• 40:25
  that put me out of commission for, like, a week and a
• 40:28
  half.
• 40:29
  >> Hunter Hoover: Yo. Uh, I knew. I knew that you had this and I've
• 40:31
  heard this, but I didn't know it was buffalo.
• 40:34
  >> Jesse Turkington: Buffalo. Yeah. It took me a long time to get back into
• 40:37
  Buffalo, but we're back, so it's okay.
• 40:39
  >> Hunter Hoover: Wow.
• 40:40
  >> Jesse Turkington: It was a weird looking nugget. Just be
• 40:43
  careful. Anyone, you ever see a weird looking nugget,
• 40:46
  just. Just say no. It's
• 40:48
  okay, man. So
• 40:51
  the. Let's see.
• 40:54
  Where was the story going? Oh, there it is. So
• 40:56
  the. The food poisoning lasted for a bit over
• 40:59
  a week, and I got so weak, I just couldn't
• 41:02
  walk. And my
• 41:04
  parents grew concerned and took me to an
• 41:07
  urgent care, and they.
• 41:10
  The urgent care misdiagnosed the
• 41:13
  situation because the top half of my body
• 41:16
  was fine. I could move just fine,
• 41:18
  but I had a really hard time moving my
• 41:21
  legs. And so they were like,
• 41:24
  meningitis, question mark. And so they
• 41:27
  sent me to the hospital where they performed
• 41:30
  a spinal tap, uh,
• 41:33
  to see if there was any meningitis and stuff, but there was
• 41:36
  none. I was just. It was food
• 41:38
  poisoning. Uh, my doctor told me that I
• 41:41
  was. Because I hadn't had food or water for that
• 41:44
  long, for a while. My body was going
• 41:47
  into, like, a premature rigor mortis, is how he said it.
• 41:50
  You were like. It started from the bottom. You lost legs, and you
• 41:53
  were gonna keep losing functions as you went up.
• 41:55
  So, uh, I guess they just don't see
• 41:58
  things like that because food poisoning typically is like,
• 42:01
  you're gonna throw up a couple times for, like, a
• 42:04
  day or a couple days, and then it goes away. But
• 42:07
  I guess. I guess genuine food poisoning
• 42:10
  is when you're actually poisoned and you're just losing
• 42:13
  function and stuff. Anyhow,
• 42:16
  uh, while I was
• 42:19
  having that food poisoning in the hospital.
• 42:23
  They wouldn't let me go until I could eat, until they
• 42:25
  watched me eat food. So I was like,
• 42:28
  fine, I don't like
• 42:31
  hospitals. I had spent the night there and I was
• 42:33
  done with it. So I was like, look, I know I'm food poisoned. I know
• 42:36
  everything you're doing is wrong. So I was
• 42:39
  like, help me to the bathroom. And
• 42:43
  so I. They helped me to the bathroom. They gave me a
• 42:46
  tray. I ate eggs on the
• 42:48
  toilet as, uh, a person watched me.
• 42:51
  And I immediately m made
• 42:53
  the eggs disappear, both in my mouth and out
• 42:56
  of my body. And they were just watching
• 42:59
  me do that. And they were like, oh, wow, maybe you,
• 43:02
  maybe you are. And I was like, yes, maybe I am.
• 43:06
  >> Hunter Hoover: What?
• 43:07
  >> Jesse Turkington: But it was from that point on,
• 43:09
  uh, that I became okay with, with eating in the
• 43:12
  bathroom. So I was like, I mean, honestly,
• 43:15
  we crossed a lot of barriers there. We had someone watch me
• 43:18
  on the bathroom, we ate in the
• 43:20
  bathroom, and I had food poisoning. All the three, just,
• 43:23
  just a great combo right there. So
• 43:27
  since then, it's like, uh, I don't
• 43:30
  really care for having. Okay, this is a little
• 43:32
  hipaa hypocritical, I know, but I'm not a huge fan of
• 43:35
  bringing, uh, like a glass
• 43:37
  of orange juice or something open container
• 43:40
  like that.
• 43:41
  >> Hunter Hoover: Yes, yes.
• 43:42
  >> Jesse Turkington: Um, if it's like a crack open
• 43:44
  little or a twist,
• 43:47
  that's fine. But I'm okay with bringing
• 43:50
  food in here and eating that uncovered. So
• 43:53
  that's. I understand that's hypocritical, but that's
• 43:56
  life. That's where we're at.
• 43:59
  >> Hunter Hoover: What do you think's the wildest thing you've eaten in the
• 44:01
  bathroom?
• 44:02
  >> Jesse Turkington: Oh, uh, probably
• 44:05
  lasagna. I don't know.
• 44:06
  >> Hunter Hoover: Whoa, lasagna? Really?
• 44:09
  >> Jesse Turkington: Yeah, just dinner. Just bring dinner in here.
• 44:12
  >> Hunter Hoover: What constitutes that? Is it just like you're mid dinner
• 44:15
  and you're like, I gotta go to the bathroom.
• 44:17
  >> Jesse Turkington: No, no, no. You don't go in here to use the bathroom. The bathroom is
• 44:20
  a safe space. Like you, you get away. It's the one,
• 44:23
  one room. You can shut the door and be alone.
• 44:26
  So, okay, you're like, I'm gonna have
• 44:29
  dinner. And then you go to the bathroom and you,
• 44:32
  you are alone.
• 44:34
  >> Hunter Hoover: That's, that's interesting. I, that's new.
• 44:36
  Um, that's new. So
• 44:40
  I think what you're doing is
• 44:42
  less, uh, is less
• 44:45
  concerning. Cause I was picturing like,
• 44:48
  pants down in,
• 44:51
  in the middle of a job. Lasagna.
• 44:53
  >> Jesse Turkington: Mhm. And I'm like, well, that's, that's a
• 44:56
  lot. I can understand. That's, that's a lot.
• 44:58
  >> Hunter Hoover: Yeah.
• 44:59
  >> Jesse Turkington: But what. Yes, I have done that, too.
• 45:01
  >> Hunter Hoover: You have. See?
• 45:02
  >> Jesse Turkington: So concern is warranted. So I'm
• 45:05
  back.
• 45:05
  >> Hunter Hoover: Well, I'm. It's totally fine. I've, I've heard people. I've
• 45:08
  heard everything from ribs. Apparently, people are eating
• 45:11
  steak in the shower. Oh, yeah. There. Chris, uh,
• 45:14
  Luckman, um, from the
• 45:17
  church. He, he's like, oh, yeah, dude, I had
• 45:20
  ribs on the toilet. And I'm like, you did not. Did they?
• 45:23
  The barbecue sauce alone is a bridge too
• 45:25
  far. Like, it's just,
• 45:28
  it's, it is too messy. Like,
• 45:31
  at least lasagna. You're, you got a utensil.
• 45:34
  You're, you know, unless you're garfielding it. But, like,
• 45:37
  I, I can't imagine that.
• 45:39
  >> Jesse Turkington: No, it's either a sandwich. Like, that's the
• 45:42
  only finger food, if you will.
• 45:45
  Everything, uh, else involves a fork or a spoon.
• 45:47
  >> Hunter Hoover: Do you ever get in the shower with any, like, do you ever have, have any
• 45:50
  of that food in the shower? Shower snack?
• 45:53
  >> Jesse Turkington: I think I took a, like, a soda pop in the
• 45:56
  shower once, but I got, like, shower, uh,
• 45:59
  water in it, and I remember thinking, never
• 46:02
  again. And I just haven't since then.
• 46:04
  >> Hunter Hoover: Yeah. Yeah. I, I always sit it in the very far
• 46:07
  back. I'm a, I'm a big polar seltzer in the shower
• 46:10
  guy. Like, especially my,
• 46:12
  like, perfect day as a,
• 46:15
  as, as, like, a, uh,
• 46:18
  I guess midwestern. Even though I don't live in the midwestern,
• 46:21
  dad is like, I drink a polar
• 46:24
  seltzer while I mow my lawn, and then I drink a
• 46:26
  second polar seltzer while I take a shower afterwards. It's
• 46:29
  like. Yeah, it, there's something about,
• 46:32
  like, those two things. I don't, I I don't really
• 46:35
  need therapy because of that exact process.
• 46:38
  Like, there's something cathartic about
• 46:41
  it. I don't know. That's probably not true. Um, have
• 46:44
  you ever, have you ever.
• 46:45
  >> Jesse Turkington: Taken a dark shower, like, with the
• 46:48
  lights off?
• 46:48
  >> Hunter Hoover: Yeah.
• 46:49
  >> Jesse Turkington: Every morning? Yeah.
• 46:51
  >> Hunter Hoover: Do you really?
• 46:52
  >> Jesse Turkington: Yeah, I prefer it. I don't need, I don't need to
• 46:55
  see anything. I just.
• 46:55
  >> Hunter Hoover: Let's go.
• 46:56
  >> Jesse Turkington: Just. It's warm water, and you just. I know.
• 46:59
  Everything is in the shower.
• 47:00
  >> Hunter Hoover: Jesse, I.
• 47:03
  I am the same. I I shower
• 47:06
  with the lights off. I have done it since
• 47:09
  college. Um, um, and you're
• 47:12
  exactly right for me, it's, it's my,
• 47:15
  I have, like, a light sensitivity adjustment thing with
• 47:18
  my eyes. I don't know. But. So, for me,
• 47:21
  the act of getting up and then, like, turning the bathroom
• 47:24
  lights on is just. It's just not on the
• 47:26
  table.
• 47:27
  >> Jesse Turkington: Bathroom lights are always so bright. It's especially
• 47:30
  near the mirror. I don't know why, but it. Yeah, maybe
• 47:32
  purposefully.
• 47:34
  >> Hunter Hoover: Yeah, it's so that way women and
• 47:36
  other people can look at their face, I guess.
• 47:39
  Um, okay, that sentence is gonna get me in
• 47:42
  trouble. Uh, have you ever eaten. Have you ever
• 47:45
  eaten an orange in the shower, as if it was an
• 47:47
  apple?
• 47:51
  >> Jesse Turkington: No, I don't know if I know that. I have. I have.
• 47:54
  I have eaten an orange, like an apple, but not in a shower.
• 47:57
  >> Hunter Hoover: Oh. So with the peel.
• 48:00
  >> Jesse Turkington: Peel it first, and then you peel it.
• 48:01
  >> Hunter Hoover: Yeah, yeah, yeah. You peel it. But then instead of, like, caring
• 48:04
  about the juices and getting the plugs and,
• 48:07
  like, maintaining, it's just full juice
• 48:09
  flow. Just. Just juice everywhere.
• 48:12
  Because it just rinses everywhere.
• 48:15
  >> Jesse Turkington: I don't know. I've never done that before.
• 48:17
  >> Hunter Hoover: It. It's worth. I always. It's worth
• 48:20
  doing once. Um, I
• 48:23
  get there's a stigma of, like, if you're the guy that carries
• 48:26
  an orange into the shower, every shower, like,
• 48:30
  you gotta, you gotta chill. But
• 48:33
  there's something cathartic about, like, I don't
• 48:36
  have to worry. Normally, I have to be
• 48:38
  concerned about how much juice is everywhere, and now I
• 48:41
  don't.
• 48:42
  >> Jesse Turkington: Yeah.
• 48:42
  >> Hunter Hoover: Um, and as, like, having a
• 48:45
  beard, it. It's the game changer.
• 48:48
  Oh, yeah. Yeah, that and ice cream. Like, I
• 48:51
  cannot eat an. I cannot eat. I I've never taken an
• 48:54
  ice cream into the shower yet. I feel
• 48:57
  like I'm willing to.
• 48:58
  >> Jesse Turkington: I mean, if you're taking a warm shower, you wouldn't want to take ice cream
• 49:01
  in there.
• 49:01
  >> Hunter Hoover: But there's something about the cold and the hot that, I don't
• 49:04
  know, it appeals to me. Um, but, like,
• 49:07
  I cannot. I am not physically able to eat an ice cream
• 49:10
  cone and not look stupid. Um,
• 49:13
  because it doesn't matter.
• 49:14
  >> Jesse Turkington: Cone. Oh, I'm with you. Okay.
• 49:16
  >> Hunter Hoover: It doesn't matter how I lick the cone.
• 49:18
  >> Jesse Turkington: Okay. I was imagining a spoon. I was like, really? I
• 49:21
  didn't.
• 49:22
  >> Hunter Hoover: But I got you on that, too. That
• 49:25
  and s'mores, campfire, smores. There is no path
• 49:28
  forward. That is not just marshmallow face.
• 49:31
  Um, yeah. Uh,
• 49:34
  have you ever. Jesse, have you ever performed a waffle
• 49:37
  stomp?
• 49:39
  >> Jesse Turkington: Oh.
• 49:42
  >> Hunter Hoover: Do you know what a waffle. It's okay if you don't. Do you know what a waffle stomp
• 49:45
  is?
• 49:45
  >> Jesse Turkington: I have an idea. Why don't you go ahead and tell me?
• 49:48
  >> Hunter Hoover: Yeah. So a waffle stomp is when a person is in the
• 49:50
  shower, and the urge to take a poop
• 49:53
  hits so fiercely that they just go into the bottom
• 49:56
  of the shower.
• 49:57
  >> Jesse Turkington: Yeah.
• 49:57
  >> Hunter Hoover: And then they just kind of river stomp it right on down the
• 50:00
  drain. Um, so have you ever done that?
• 50:03
  >> Jesse Turkington: No. No. I am proud to say,
• 50:05
  uh, that I have never done that.
• 50:08
  >> Hunter Hoover: Very good. Um, that is
• 50:11
  the correct answer. Um, some of us will fail
• 50:14
  the test.
• 50:15
  >> Jesse Turkington: Uh, I think in terms
• 50:17
  of waffling.
• 50:19
  >> Hunter Hoover: Yeah.
• 50:20
  >> Jesse Turkington: Uh, the closest I've gotten to that was pooping off
• 50:23
  a bridge.
• 50:24
  >> Hunter Hoover: But you did.
• 50:25
  >> Jesse Turkington: It was a railroad bridge. So it had those.
• 50:28
  It had slats every few feet. So you
• 50:31
  had. It was really, really high up
• 50:34
  over the river. And you just find a slat
• 50:37
  and you just put yourself in between that slat and just
• 50:39
  let.
• 50:40
  >> Hunter Hoover: What river?
• 50:42
  >> Jesse Turkington: Of course, the Willamette.
• 50:44
  >> Hunter Hoover: It already is full of it anyway.
• 50:45
  >> Jesse Turkington: Yeah, that's the idea.
• 50:47
  >> Hunter Hoover: Do you. When was this? Can
• 50:50
  you say?
• 50:51
  >> Jesse Turkington: Yeah? Yeah. Um,
• 50:54
  I was in high school.
• 50:55
  >> Hunter Hoover: Okay, so that's an acceptable answer?
• 50:57
  >> Jesse Turkington: Yeah. That was like, what, 12, 13, 14
• 51:00
  years ago, man.
• 51:02
  >> Hunter Hoover: Dude, pooping off a bridge is pretty. That's pretty
• 51:05
  strong move.
• 51:06
  >> Jesse Turkington: Like, pretty fun.
• 51:07
  >> Hunter Hoover: I would argue. That's a good bathroom
• 51:10
  story.
• 51:11
  >> Jesse Turkington: Uh oh, you're right. I didn't even think of that.
• 51:13
  >> Hunter Hoover: I'm telling you, everybody, everybody has something,
• 51:17
  and it just. We just have to dig. Okay.
• 51:20
  Were you with. Were you accompanied?
• 51:22
  >> Jesse Turkington: Yes. It was a canoe trip. We
• 51:24
  started in the Santiago river, and it turned into the willamette.
• 51:27
  We would just find an island and we would sleep. We called
• 51:30
  ourselves the pumpkin pirates. It was a wonderful
• 51:33
  adventure. We climbed up
• 51:35
  this, uh, climbed up
• 51:38
  this railroad, uh,
• 51:41
  bridge that went over the willamette. And, uh,
• 51:44
  I. We were following footsteps of those who
• 51:47
  had been before us in that they had
• 51:50
  hammered anything,
• 51:52
  like shoes. They would hammer anything onto
• 51:55
  the way so you could climb up the bridge. So there
• 51:58
  were planks of wood, driftwood
• 52:01
  shoes,
• 52:03
  uh, an oar. They're random
• 52:05
  things just hammered into this
• 52:09
  structure that you would climb up. Very sketchy.
• 52:11
  >> Hunter Hoover: And then we're gonna say, that sounds terrifying.
• 52:14
  >> Jesse Turkington: Yeah. Once you get up to the top. Uh,
• 52:17
  then we would go to the far side
• 52:20
  of the bridge, do our business,
• 52:23
  which was fun because you would wait for, like, it
• 52:26
  was several second drop. You would push, and then you would wait for
• 52:29
  the kablunk. It was so satisfying.
• 52:30
  >> Hunter Hoover: Oh, my gosh.
• 52:32
  >> Jesse Turkington: And then we would go to the other
• 52:34
  side. Uh, and
• 52:37
  just for clarification, the stream was going the
• 52:40
  opposite direction. So we didn't have to worry about it. So we went to the
• 52:43
  other side of the bridge, and then we would do some bridge jumping. We'd jump
• 52:46
  off.
• 52:46
  >> Hunter Hoover: Oh, man. If I wasn't, like,
• 52:49
  moderately afraid of heights, I would find this spot
• 52:52
  and.
• 52:52
  >> Jesse Turkington: Oh, I was terrified. I was terrified. I'm terrified of heights.
• 52:55
  But, uh, I only jumped off once, and I was
• 52:58
  the last one to do so because of
• 53:01
  a choo choo starting to choose its way.
• 53:04
  And we were there, like, jesse, you gotta jump. And I was like,
• 53:06
  oh, I gotta jump. And you could feel the
• 53:09
  rumble of.
• 53:10
  >> Hunter Hoover: The, oh, no, no.
• 53:12
  >> Jesse Turkington: I, so I took a quick jump off the
• 53:14
  bridge, but it was, it was far. It was not anywhere
• 53:17
  near. We just heard it. We could see the,
• 53:20
  the poofs of.
• 53:22
  >> Hunter Hoover: Its still, like, who?
• 53:24
  That's, that's, man, that's
• 53:27
  awesome.
• 53:30
  It's worth the climb just for the, the bathroom
• 53:32
  experience. Uh, so if you're in the
• 53:35
  shower, in the, in the urge to go to the bathroom hits,
• 53:38
  what are you, what do you usually do immediately?
• 53:40
  >> Jesse Turkington: Um, turning off the water, drying
• 53:43
  off, going to sit down on,
• 53:46
  do you.
• 53:46
  >> Hunter Hoover: Ever get back in after, like, it's like, I have to
• 53:49
  reshower now.
• 53:50
  >> Jesse Turkington: Yeah, it's a minor inconvenience. You just, yes, get back in.
• 53:52
  >> Hunter Hoover: Um, so there's a third group of
• 53:55
  people. So the wall, there's the waffle stompler
• 53:57
  stomplers, and then there's the people who get
• 54:00
  out and do the normal, but then
• 54:03
  there's a third group of people.
• 54:04
  >> Jesse Turkington: There can't be.
• 54:06
  >> Hunter Hoover: That exists. That, and I only, again,
• 54:08
  I found some, some strange things on the
• 54:11
  Internet, um, that they will
• 54:14
  poo either into the bottom of the shower
• 54:16
  or the real debased of humanity will
• 54:19
  poo and catch it.
• 54:20
  >> Jesse Turkington: No.
• 54:21
  >> Hunter Hoover: And they will, like, throw it into the toilet. That's not even
• 54:24
  exit the shower.
• 54:25
  >> Jesse Turkington: Oh, my goodness.
• 54:26
  >> Hunter Hoover: And so for me, um,
• 54:29
  99.5% of
• 54:32
  the time, I am exiting the shower doing exactly what you
• 54:35
  have described. Yeah, the other, .5%
• 54:38
  I will and have stomped it. But I
• 54:41
  cannot imagine.
• 54:42
  >> Jesse Turkington: Yeah, there's, there's never been more
• 54:45
  disappointed in humanity than I am right now.
• 54:49
  >> Hunter Hoover: That, that somebody out there is catching.
• 54:51
  >> Jesse Turkington: It, and someone's catching their, uh, uh,
• 54:54
  oh, Reddit. What if you keep the litter
• 54:56
  down on your toilet, you can't toss it.
• 55:00
  >> Hunter Hoover: Well, yeah, Reddit's a dark and scary wasteland,
• 55:03
  um, is what I've learned. And so there's, like,
• 55:06
  there's, like, pages that are like, bathroom horror stories.
• 55:09
  And, like,
• 55:12
  I mean, there was from people saying, like, oh, yeah, I just catch it. And
• 55:15
  toss around the corner toilets right there to people is like, oh, yeah, I don't
• 55:18
  like stomping it, but I will poo in the bottom and then, like, scoot it to the
• 55:21
  back of the shower and then wait until I'm done and then collect.
• 55:24
  >> Jesse Turkington: I'm like, and we're okay with just saying
• 55:26
  that?
• 55:27
  >> Hunter Hoover: Apparently people are fine with saying that on the Internet. I,
• 55:30
  um. Um.
• 55:31
  >> Jesse Turkington: Wow.
• 55:32
  >> Hunter Hoover: Yeah, those people give me
• 55:35
  courage to admit the handful
• 55:38
  of times that I have stomped it.
• 55:40
  >> Jesse Turkington: Well, I mean, that's.
• 55:42
  >> Hunter Hoover: And one was for research.
• 55:44
  Uh, one was. One was because
• 55:47
  I felt it had been too long since I had done the last
• 55:50
  one. Um, and one was necessity.
• 55:53
  Like, all of the bathroom stalls are
• 55:55
  full and there is gonna be
• 55:58
  a. There's gonna be a bad thing happening.
• 56:01
  >> Jesse Turkington: And also interesting, I never
• 56:03
  had surge while in a dormitory. I've
• 56:06
  never had that happen.
• 56:07
  >> Hunter Hoover: So. So it was our church. I was there with the young
• 56:10
  adult guys. Yeah. Uh, Michael Wall, our custodian,
• 56:13
  he's aware. I've atoned. Um,
• 56:16
  but, uh, yeah, they
• 56:18
  did. Young adult guys were. One was showering because we had done, like,
• 56:21
  an event. And then the both bathroom stalls were full. And I'm
• 56:24
  in the shower and I'm like, yo, is the toilet open?
• 56:27
  Nah. We're. I'm like, oh, no.
• 56:29
  >> Jesse Turkington: Okay.
• 56:30
  >> Hunter Hoover: So I did.
• 56:31
  >> Jesse Turkington: I've lived in a dorm. I've done the experience. I can understand.
• 56:34
  >> Hunter Hoover: Uh, it was the only one of necessity. The others
• 56:37
  were research and just guilt that I
• 56:40
  asked so many people and hadn't done
• 56:43
  one so recent. So, um. But,
• 56:45
  yeah.
• 56:47
  >> Jesse Turkington: Wow.
• 56:48
  >> Hunter Hoover: Uh, so a no to the waffle
• 56:51
  stomp. Um, do
• 56:54
  you. Do you have any pet peeves? Like,
• 56:56
  bathroom pet peeves? Uh, things
• 56:59
  that people do and you are
• 57:02
  engaged to be wed.
• 57:06
  Soon to be wed. Uh,
• 57:08
  you might find. I find that people find things that are pet
• 57:11
  peeves once they share bathrooms more
• 57:14
  frequently. Do you have any bathroom pet peeves?
• 57:17
  >> Jesse Turkington: Uh, I think the strongest one is way
• 57:20
  the toilet paper is. Is flipped. I think that's probably
• 57:23
  the strongest one. Um,
• 57:26
  I don't care about the toilet
• 57:29
  seat. Up, down, whatever. Uh, uh, we
• 57:32
  had pets growing up, so we kept it down. Uh, uh,
• 57:35
  because we did. We had. We had a cat fall in once
• 57:38
  trying to get. Try to try to drink some
• 57:40
  water. And ever since then, we're like, you know what? We're going
• 57:43
  to just keep the toilet down forever. And. And that's
• 57:46
  been my go to.
• 57:48
  >> Hunter Hoover: Yeah. Uh, it's wise.
• 57:49
  >> Jesse Turkington: Yeah, just keep it down.
• 57:51
  >> Hunter Hoover: Yeah, it's fair. Uh,
• 57:54
  I don't want it to seem insensitive, me
• 57:57
  asking you this because after you have shared your
• 58:00
  story of buffalo wild wings.
• 58:03
  But I ask people, like, is there a restaurant
• 58:06
  establishment that does you the most foul?
• 58:09
  >> Jesse Turkington: Sure.
• 58:10
  >> Hunter Hoover: That just is. And is it buffalo maybe?
• 58:13
  Like.
• 58:13
  >> Jesse Turkington: No, I mean, I think it used to,
• 58:16
  for sure. I don't know. I don't. I don't eat there a lot
• 58:19
  anymore. I. Yeah. Uh, I like the experience. Right. I like the
• 58:22
  tvs. And sometimes I'll go get a shot,
• 58:25
  but I'll go with friends and I'll let them get something,
• 58:28
  and I'll just have one or two.
• 58:30
  But, uh, I think this is also
• 58:33
  compounded because I'm kind of lactose
• 58:36
  intolerant. I wasn't always,
• 58:39
  but I have become, because I had too much,
• 58:41
  is what my doctor shared with me.
• 58:44
  So I.
• 58:46
  >> Hunter Hoover: That's a thing?
• 58:47
  >> Jesse Turkington: Yeah. I had too much milk,
• 58:50
  specifically, too much moocau milk.
• 58:53
  So I. I, uh,
• 58:56
  would say little caesars
• 58:59
  sometimes affectionately called little
• 59:01
  squeezers.
• 59:03
  >> Hunter Hoover: Yes.
• 59:06
  You just. That double cheese. You ever get
• 59:09
  the double cheese? The extra most.
• 59:14
  >> Jesse Turkington: It's a. I have to plan my
• 59:17
  evening, right? If I'm gonna eat little caesars
• 59:20
  or pizza, I have to plan my evening knowing
• 59:23
  I'm gonna be back in my bathroom by a
• 59:26
  certain time. I have these. I have these
• 59:29
  pills I can take. They're like these chewable lactase.
• 59:32
  >> Hunter Hoover: Yep.
• 59:32
  >> Jesse Turkington: And that. That help with it. But
• 59:35
  yes, for some reason, little caesars knows a
• 59:38
  workaround around
• 59:40
  those little pills.
• 59:42
  >> Hunter Hoover: Oh, shoot. They've got, like, extra
• 59:44
  lactose. They.
• 59:45
  >> Jesse Turkington: I don't know. They just. I don't know.
• 59:48
  I. I haven't had, uh, uh, straight from New York like
• 59:51
  that. Really runny.
• 59:52
  >> Hunter Hoover: Oh, yeah.
• 59:53
  >> Jesse Turkington: Pizza in a long time. I. That might do it,
• 59:55
  too.
• 59:56
  >> Hunter Hoover: Yeah.
• 59:56
  >> Jesse Turkington: But, uh. Ah, I I. Little caesars.
• 59:58
  >> Hunter Hoover: I do have so. Little caesars. Big
• 1:00:01
  fan.
• 1:00:01
  >> Jesse Turkington: Um.
• 1:00:02
  >> Hunter Hoover: Um,
• 1:00:06
  yeah, I have a lot of follow up questions about the.
• 1:00:09
  The comment about drinking too much milk.
• 1:00:11
  >> Jesse Turkington: Sure. What's up?
• 1:00:12
  >> Hunter Hoover: Did your doctor tell you how much was too much?
• 1:00:15
  >> Jesse Turkington: Like, uh, dairy? Not like a
• 1:00:17
  quantity, like a number, but, yeah, I. I
• 1:00:20
  would have, like, a gallon every
• 1:00:23
  two days
• 1:00:26
  of moo cow. M moo. Yeah. Milk,
• 1:00:29
  dude.
• 1:00:29
  >> Hunter Hoover: Your parents were buying milk back
• 1:00:32
  then?
• 1:00:32
  >> Jesse Turkington: Oh, yeah. Well, so I'm the youngest of
• 1:00:35
  five boys.
• 1:00:36
  >> Hunter Hoover: Okay. Yeah, they're used to it.
• 1:00:39
  >> Jesse Turkington: We all drink. I have a, uh,
• 1:00:42
  my second oldest brother. He's very tall. He's very
• 1:00:45
  large. He's made of pure muscle. He's
• 1:00:48
  us marine, Deputy sheriff. Just everything
• 1:00:51
  a man is. And he.
• 1:00:54
  He would drink a gallon. A day. So I was. I was trying to keep
• 1:00:57
  up, right? I was like,
• 1:01:00
  we just liked milk. We just liked the texture. We liked
• 1:01:03
  the thickness. We liked the taste.
• 1:01:05
  We'd have it with cereal. We'd have it as just
• 1:01:08
  in a glass. Just anywhere,
• 1:01:11
  man. Yeah.
• 1:01:13
  >> Hunter Hoover: You had me scared because I love
• 1:01:15
  cheese. Um,
• 1:01:18
  and I was fearing that, like, maybe
• 1:01:21
  because I'm having a little bit of, like, if I get
• 1:01:24
  too pizza friendly, I.
• 1:01:27
  Yeah, I'm noticing some changes. Um, um, and so I was
• 1:01:30
  getting a little. Little scared that I was gonna have a
• 1:01:32
  similar, like, hey, bud, you over lactose yourself
• 1:01:35
  into an intolerance? Um. Um, but,
• 1:01:38
  yeah, half gallon. A half gallon a
• 1:01:41
  day is. That's impressive.
• 1:01:42
  >> Jesse Turkington: Mm hmm.
• 1:01:43
  >> Hunter Hoover: Um, yeah, I I'm like, I'm
• 1:01:46
  50 50 on milk. I just.
• 1:01:49
  I pretty much only drink milk if I've dipped anywhere between
• 1:01:52
  four and six oreos in it. Like, I.
• 1:01:55
  It's like, you talk about rituals. Yeah, I
• 1:01:58
  have an oreo eating. Like, I have a ritual with.
• 1:02:00
  I I have to have at least four.
• 1:02:04
  >> Jesse Turkington: Okay.
• 1:02:04
  >> Hunter Hoover: And I don't know why, but it's something about, like,
• 1:02:07
  the. I'm gonna sound like
• 1:02:10
  an absolute crazy person since I haven't
• 1:02:13
  done that yet, but it's something about, like, the
• 1:02:16
  heat of the cookie.
• 1:02:18
  Four oreo cookies worth of heat
• 1:02:21
  dissipating into fridge. Cold milk
• 1:02:24
  puts the milk at the exact perfect temperature to
• 1:02:27
  be drank. Anna thinks I'm
• 1:02:30
  absolutely insane for it. She does?
• 1:02:32
  Like, yeah.
• 1:02:35
  But, um, that's pretty much the only time I'm
• 1:02:37
  drinking white milk. Yeah. Is
• 1:02:40
  I. If I.
• 1:02:41
  >> Jesse Turkington: What about after a brownie or something, just to wash it down, you
• 1:02:43
  know?
• 1:02:44
  >> Hunter Hoover: Uh, uh, maybe m.
• 1:02:47
  I'll usually. I. I'll usually either just go
• 1:02:50
  for. I honestly, I'll go for coffee. Like, if I'm
• 1:02:53
  trying to wash down a sweet, I go for that bitter coffee.
• 1:02:56
  Like, oh, yeah, I love coffee.
• 1:02:59
  Um, interesting. I would make the absolute worst
• 1:03:02
  Mormon because I I'm just
• 1:03:05
  a huge fan of coffee.
• 1:03:07
  >> Jesse Turkington: Like, yeah, you would.
• 1:03:10
  >> Hunter Hoover: Um, for many reasons. Uh,
• 1:03:13
  but it's just. Yeah, I love
• 1:03:15
  coffee. Um, I don't like the milk.
• 1:03:18
  Cutting peanut butter. It doesn't do it for me.
• 1:03:21
  Uh, to me, it just makes me phlegmy.
• 1:03:24
  >> Jesse Turkington: Um, yeah, I can understand that. Yeah.
• 1:03:27
  >> Hunter Hoover: Yeah. But I. Yeah. Four oreos at
• 1:03:30
  minimum. Four oreos, no more than six. If you get more than
• 1:03:33
  six, it's too much sugar.
• 1:03:34
  >> Jesse Turkington: Yeah.
• 1:03:34
  >> Hunter Hoover: Um, there's probably some health person out there that's like, do you
• 1:03:37
  ate. You ate four? Um. Um, but, like,
• 1:03:40
  yeah, four to six is like, the butter zone.
• 1:03:43
  >> Jesse Turkington: Um, um, it's kind of that same idea of, of
• 1:03:46
  like drinking the leftover milk from cereal. Right.
• 1:03:49
  Like a good cereal.
• 1:03:51
  >> Hunter Hoover: Yes. Uh, uh, uh, I,
• 1:03:54
  boy. Sorry, Jesse, we're deviating from bathroom, but
• 1:03:57
  that's fine. This show often does. Um, um, so
• 1:04:00
  the other thing that's kind of deviant that I do with, with
• 1:04:03
  milk is I put it on cake.
• 1:04:07
  >> Jesse Turkington: Excuse me?
• 1:04:08
  >> Hunter Hoover: Cake. So you get, like a slice of cake.
• 1:04:10
  >> Jesse Turkington: Yeah.
• 1:04:11
  >> Hunter Hoover: My preferred way of eating cake is with no
• 1:04:14
  frosting. And just top it with just a little bit of
• 1:04:16
  white milk.
• 1:04:17
  >> Jesse Turkington: Oh, my gosh.
• 1:04:18
  >> Hunter Hoover: Um, yeah, and then, and then it's kind of,
• 1:04:21
  it kind of gets really soft, and by the
• 1:04:24
  end, it's kind of like milk mush, but it's,
• 1:04:26
  it cuts the sweet a little bit. Um,
• 1:04:30
  yeah, I'm not a fan of
• 1:04:32
  frostings.
• 1:04:33
  >> Jesse Turkington: Of frosting? No, I'm, um,
• 1:04:36
  it's a little too, yeah. I don't know.
• 1:04:39
  >> Hunter Hoover: I used to, I used to give my father such grief because
• 1:04:42
  when I was a kid, he would scrape every
• 1:04:45
  piece of cake that was ever put in front of him, and just
• 1:04:48
  the pile of frosting would be on the side of his plate. And I used to make fun of him, be like,
• 1:04:51
  dad, come on. It's not even that bad. And I do that now. I
• 1:04:54
  have become my father. And
• 1:04:57
  I, yeah, I just, I'm
• 1:05:00
  less fond of sweet as time goes on. And so I look
• 1:05:03
  for that bitter, uh, thing to mute it. Um,
• 1:05:06
  but the other is, if, Jesse, if you
• 1:05:09
  ever look into, level up your cereal.
• 1:05:11
  >> Jesse Turkington: Mm hmm.
• 1:05:12
  >> Hunter Hoover: You, peanut butter the inside of the bowl.
• 1:05:14
  >> Jesse Turkington: Oh, my.
• 1:05:15
  >> Hunter Hoover: You spread peanut butter all over the inside of the bowl. And then you
• 1:05:18
  cereal, and then you milk and you just get like
• 1:05:20
  a little spoonful of peanut butter and cereal.
• 1:05:23
  Oh, yeah. Now the, the dish
• 1:05:26
  job, like the washing of the dish after, you gotta let
• 1:05:29
  it soak because that peanut butter is gonna be
• 1:05:32
  foul in there.
• 1:05:33
  >> Jesse Turkington: But, yeah.
• 1:05:33
  >> Hunter Hoover: Uh, um, yeah.
• 1:05:35
  >> Jesse Turkington: What kind of cereal?
• 1:05:37
  >> Hunter Hoover: Uh, I've done it with most every type.
• 1:05:40
  It's better with, like, chocolate varieties.
• 1:05:44
  Personally, my favorite cereal to do it with is lucky charms
• 1:05:47
  because they're kind of, they're kind of already
• 1:05:50
  kind of plain and little bit sweet. But then adding that
• 1:05:53
  peanut butter to them is just, it's just right.
• 1:05:56
  Um, um, wow.
• 1:05:57
  >> Jesse Turkington: That, yes.
• 1:05:58
  >> Hunter Hoover: And it works with, it works with fruit cereal too. It's like,
• 1:06:01
  it's kind of like a straw peanut butter and jelly situation with the fruit
• 1:06:04
  cereal. Um, cinnamon ones are
• 1:06:07
  weird, but it's perfectly fine if you,
• 1:06:10
  if you like peanut butter, on french toast. Cinnamon french toast.
• 1:06:13
  It's like that. Um, um, yeah,
• 1:06:15
  Anna introduced that to me. Game changer. But,
• 1:06:19
  yeah, I'll, uh, uh, I'll try
• 1:06:22
  it.
• 1:06:22
  >> Jesse Turkington: I'll get, I'll get my fiance. We'll have a date.
• 1:06:24
  >> Hunter Hoover: Yeah. Oh, little
• 1:06:27
  cereal. Little cereal. Evening. That's.
• 1:06:29
  Yeah, that'd be awesome.
• 1:06:33
  You'll have to tell her. Yeah. Uh, uh,
• 1:06:36
  by the way, there's gonna be, there's gonna be a podcast
• 1:06:39
  that comes out. You should know.
• 1:06:44
  >> Jesse Turkington: I sent her some perfect.
• 1:06:47
  >> Hunter Hoover: Oh, my gosh, that's funny. That's
• 1:06:50
  awesome. Well, cool. Do you have
• 1:06:52
  any parting bathroom wisdom to
• 1:06:55
  leave us with? Good, uh, advice? Bathroom
• 1:06:58
  knowledge? Anything you want to share.
• 1:07:04
  >> Jesse Turkington: Man? You know when you sit on a toilet for too long
• 1:07:07
  and your legs go asleep?
• 1:07:09
  >> Hunter Hoover: Yep.
• 1:07:10
  >> Jesse Turkington: So it's such a, uh,
• 1:07:13
  ah, tenuous situation because you got to be careful. You
• 1:07:16
  don't want to stomp because then your leg will just
• 1:07:19
  like reverb, reverberate with all
• 1:07:21
  the pins and needles and just.
• 1:07:24
  It kind of make you lean against the counter for a
• 1:07:27
  second and kind of go, oh, no.
• 1:07:29
  >> Hunter Hoover: Yeah.
• 1:07:30
  >> Jesse Turkington: But a way to help
• 1:07:32
  with your pins and needles in your legs
• 1:07:35
  after having haven't sit for too long
• 1:07:38
  is before you get up to stretch
• 1:07:41
  them out before you.
• 1:07:44
  So you're sitting on the toilet, your legs out extended,
• 1:07:47
  and just do that a couple times. Get some blood flow into
• 1:07:50
  them, and then carefully
• 1:07:53
  stand up. Make sure you don't stub any toes
• 1:07:55
  because, man, you think it's numb, but.
• 1:07:58
  And, uh, then you slowly
• 1:08:01
  take two steps. Take two steps
• 1:08:04
  backward and, uh, you're good to
• 1:08:07
  go. That gets rid of it.
• 1:08:09
  >> Hunter Hoover: So this is awesome advice because one
• 1:08:12
  of the things that I complain about frequently on the show
• 1:08:15
  is I pretty much have
• 1:08:18
  that experience about
• 1:08:21
  three times a month, um, when I record.
• 1:08:23
  And so I'm laughing because
• 1:08:27
  I can't think of a funnier visual than somebody on the
• 1:08:30
  toilet with their legs straight.
• 1:08:32
  >> Jesse Turkington: Out in front of them. I, uh, mean,
• 1:08:35
  I understand you might, depending on the
• 1:08:38
  bathroom setup, you might not be able to do that. I just was
• 1:08:41
  house sitting for a friend the other day, and their
• 1:08:43
  toilet was right in front of their
• 1:08:46
  sink and there was no leg room except to
• 1:08:49
  sit down. So if you can't do it, sometimes
• 1:08:52
  you got to turn to the side of the toilet. Or the
• 1:08:55
  idea, I guess you don't have to do those steps. The idea
• 1:08:58
  is to just get blood flow in your legs with the blood moving before
• 1:09:01
  you.
• 1:09:01
  >> Hunter Hoover: Yeah.
• 1:09:02
  >> Jesse Turkington: Because you can't. I mean, man, I'll tell you, there's been times I tried
• 1:09:05
  to take a few steps. You just can't. It
• 1:09:07
  just hurts. And you just let the pins and needles take over for a
• 1:09:10
  second.
• 1:09:11
  >> Hunter Hoover: Oh, man. Yeah, I, uh,
• 1:09:13
  uh, I'm going to
• 1:09:16
  be putting some of these methods to use because
• 1:09:19
  I just. My butt goes numb, just to
• 1:09:22
  be frank. It's like, really?
• 1:09:25
  I gotta get. I gotta get a better seat.
• 1:09:27
  >> Jesse Turkington: Hunter, I would. So I
• 1:09:30
  worked my first legit job. I
• 1:09:33
  was a foreman at a blueberry farm,
• 1:09:36
  and, uh, the farmer was
• 1:09:39
  a snowbird. So every winter, he would go to Arizona. I
• 1:09:42
  would take care of his house. I would just live in it for him
• 1:09:45
  all winter. And that man
• 1:09:47
  had a. A special
• 1:09:50
  toilet seat that was
• 1:09:52
  padded. It was a padded toilet seat.
• 1:09:55
  It was the most incredible thing. I don't
• 1:09:58
  know. Little confession time. I sat on that
• 1:10:01
  thing for. For way too long, way too many
• 1:10:03
  times. But it did alleviate. It did
• 1:10:06
  alleviate a lot of the butt numbing
• 1:10:09
  stuff.
• 1:10:10
  >> Hunter Hoover: I might have to look into that, because
• 1:10:13
  this, this, uh, this
• 1:10:15
  project's about four years in, and, um,
• 1:10:18
  I. The numbing does not seem
• 1:10:21
  to. I'm not building up a tolerance, is what I'm
• 1:10:23
  learning. Well, very
• 1:10:26
  good. That's sound wisdom. Uh,
• 1:10:30
  uh, before I do the parting things, Jesse,
• 1:10:33
  can you go ahead and plug
• 1:10:36
  parables things again for us, for the listener?
• 1:10:39
  >> Jesse Turkington: Sure. So, um, the
• 1:10:42
  nonprofit is called Parable ministries.
• 1:10:44
  We have, uh, three podcasts out
• 1:10:47
  that is available anywhere right now. Uh,
• 1:10:50
  one is called pickled parables. It's a Bible teaching
• 1:10:53
  podcast where we partner with several different bible
• 1:10:56
  teachers. They teach on a rotating basis. Uh,
• 1:10:58
  our other podcast is called my dusty Bible,
• 1:11:02
  and it's a Bible reading podcast. I read through the Bible in
• 1:11:05
  the new living translation. Each episode is just a
• 1:11:07
  full book. And we just launched
• 1:11:11
  a, uh, third podcast called commentaries that is
• 1:11:13
  hosted by your one and only hunter
• 1:11:16
  Hoover. And he
• 1:11:18
  goes paragraph by paragraph through the books
• 1:11:21
  of the Bible, starting in the book of James.
• 1:11:24
  So those are the three podcasts, uh,
• 1:11:27
  available anywhere, um, that you like to listen to.
• 1:11:30
  Podcasts. Uh, we're working on getting them
• 1:11:33
  all up to date on YouTube. Uh, we have some on
• 1:11:36
  YouTube, but I. We don't have the full backlog yet.
• 1:11:39
  If you're interested in following along, um,
• 1:11:42
  just with news and what we're doing, you give us a follow
• 1:11:45
  on Instagram, Facebook, or TikTok
• 1:11:48
  at Parable ministries.
• 1:11:51
  And if you would like to reach out just to chat, you
• 1:11:54
  can always reach out to me. My email address is
• 1:11:57
  jessyparableministries.com.
• 1:12:00
  and, uh, chat. I mean, we
• 1:12:03
  could talk about questions for a podcast or we could just
• 1:12:06
  chat about anything really. Uh, I'm um, down for
• 1:12:09
  that.
• 1:12:09
  >> Hunter Hoover: Yeah, yeah. And I'll be putting
• 1:12:12
  links uh, in the stuff down below. And so if you,
• 1:12:15
  if you hear Jesse say that and you're like, ah, I
• 1:12:18
  can't remember what you can, it'll be down below. They
• 1:12:21
  can click those m but yeah,
• 1:12:24
  we're uh, I'm excited
• 1:12:26
  to be a part
• 1:12:29
  of what parable is doing. It's been, it's been a good
• 1:12:32
  um, experience for me, but also just opportunity to
• 1:12:35
  kind of, kind of jump in with that. So um,
• 1:12:38
  um, but yeah, Jesse, thank you for being here.
• 1:12:41
  >> Jesse Turkington: Oh, it was my pleasure. Absolutely.
• 1:12:43
  >> Hunter Hoover: Yeah, I'm going to, I'm going to close out the show. I tell
• 1:12:45
  people whenever I do the
• 1:12:47
  outro, uh, things, I always feel
• 1:12:50
  like uh, if you, if you've ever seen a dog
• 1:12:53
  taking a poop in the backyard, I
• 1:12:56
  always feel like that dog
• 1:12:58
  because like it knows that it's being watched, but you
• 1:13:01
  can't like what it's going to
• 1:13:04
  just, it's got to do it. Um, and so that's
• 1:13:07
  me whenever I close the show with a guest. So
• 1:13:10
  I'm going to close the show. Thank uh, you all for
• 1:13:13
  listening. Uh, as always, leave us a rating review.
• 1:13:16
  Uh, we prefer the five star option, but we understand.
• 1:13:19
  Um, you can follow us at privycast.
• 1:13:22
  Send us an email privycastmail.com dot. We'd love to
• 1:13:25
  hear from you. Um, yeah, go check us out
• 1:13:28
  online. Uh, privy dash cast.com dot.
• 1:13:31
  And uh, yeah, thank you to Kevin and Poddington
• 1:13:34
  for the use of their music this week. This has been another
• 1:13:37
  episode of Privy. Thank you so much for joining us. Thank you,
• 1:13:40
  Jesse, again, for being here. Um, and
• 1:13:43
  now, as always, don't forget to
• 1:13:45
  flush. And then the part that I always edit
• 1:13:48
  out that I just crammed the microphone
• 1:13:51
  right back here. Mhm.