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How to Attract Provider Men Who Want to Take Care of You · Mindful Success Path

• 0:32
  If you're tired of attracting broke, lazy men who expect you to split everything 50 50, then this video is for you because I'm gonna be showing you exactly why you keep attracting men who can't or won't provide, and how to start attracting generous, successful men who actually want to take care of you.
• 0:49
  And by the end of this video, you're gonna understand the exact energy and mindset that attracts provider men like a Mac did.
• 0:57
  Hi, my name is Amanda.
• 0:58
  Welcome to this channel where we talk about how to manifest what you want in life without all the extra stress, chaos, and drama that most people are accustomed to.
• 1:06
  Lately we've been talking about how to manifest love.
• 1:08
  What's divine feminine energy?
• 1:09
  What's masculine energy?
• 1:11
  What does a healthy dynamic look like?
• 1:13
  What are healthy communication skills?
• 1:15
  So if that's something you're interested in, make sure to subscribe and hit the notification bell because I bring my 15 years of experience as a professional coach, mostly working with women in different areas of their lives.
• 1:26
  In addition to that six years of experience being around very high performing ambitious men and asking them what they were dealing with in relationships and combining those two things to bring you the content.
• 1:40
  On this channel because once I understood divine feminine energy and combined it with what I learned from men, I was able to manifest my own protector provider husband within four months.
• 1:50
  And the same can happen for you.
• 1:52
  And as always, you can find all the extra resources and ways to work with me in the description.
• 1:58
  If there's anything specifically that has a lot to do with this video, then I'm gonna mention it throughout the video so you can dive deeper into these topic.
• 2:07
  So let's get into it.
• 2:09
  First, let's talk about the state of men and where they are at right now, particularly in Western culture.
• 2:15
  My husband and I are both from the United States, however, um, we have backgrounds that are a little bit more traditional than perhaps what is going on in the United States right now, which informs some of the content on this channel.
• 2:28
  So in my case my family's Cuban.
• 2:30
  My parents are both born in Cuba.
• 2:32
  Um, and I was raised in.
• 2:33
  Latin culture.
• 2:34
  Latin culture tends to be more traditional than what you see in the United States or Canada, or parts of Europe, so on and so forth.
• 2:41
  And my husband.
• 2:43
  Is, uh, Ukrainian on one side.
• 2:45
  And if you know anything about Eastern European and Russian men, they also tend to be a lot more, uh, traditional in terms of relationship dynamics and there's very good reason, uh, for.
• 2:58
  For that.
• 2:58
  So now, and also to bring this up, we currently live in Mexico because we like the international lifestyle, we like learning from different countries.
• 3:06
  So we're seeing all these different things happen in different parts of the world.
• 3:10
  And part of what we're seeing in the western world, in particularly, and when I say western world, I'm referring to what is traditionally considered Western.
• 3:19
  So United States, Canada, Western Europe, Australia, uh, those places.
• 3:25
  What's going on is that we have an absolute disaster going on with relationships and with men in particular.
• 3:33
  A lot of women are feeling really overwhelmed and exhausted, and men seem to not be doing very well at all.
• 3:40
  There's a loneliness epidemic.
• 3:42
  Um, it's, it's, it's really bad, which has led to the rise of all this red appeal craziness that we see on the internet, which is basically just a cult preying on.
• 3:51
  Insecure men.
• 3:52
  And this begs the question, okay, well how the hell did we get here in Western culture?
• 3:57
  And I'm going to explain it and I'm going to be borrowing from Adam Lane Smith of attachment.
• 4:03
  Adam, who puts it perfectly, when I heard him say this, everything made sense.
• 4:08
  So in the United States in particular is what I'm going to be talking about, but it's basically the western world in general in those countries that I said we have had for the last a hundred or so years.
• 4:20
  Um.
• 4:21
  A total like dismemberment basically of the societal structures that are needed in order to raise healthy people.
• 4:32
  Okay.
• 4:33
  Now what are those structures?
• 4:35
  One of those structures is the family unit itself, but it's not just the family unit.
• 4:40
  It's also, um, the extended family.
• 4:43
  It's also people living in community.
• 4:46
  It's neighbors.
• 4:47
  It's.
• 4:47
  Friends.
• 4:48
  It's having really deep personal, uh, relationships within the community itself, which I can tell you by living in Mexico right now and being Latina, this is one of the things that Latinos really value, um, is having those community bonds and those deep personal relationships and those family bonds.
• 5:04
  It's one of the differences between Latin America and what it's considered, you know, traditionally western.
• 5:10
  Culture again, United States, Canada, Western Europe, Australia, uh, those kinds of places.
• 5:16
  So, uh, as a Latina, I grew up with the notion that like family is everything, period.
• 5:21
  Point blank, end of story.
• 5:23
  Basically.
• 5:23
  It's like God, family, when you are Latina, and I don't know if Latinos know this, but this is like one of the things that Latinos do well, there's a lot of things where we're a hot mess, but this is one of the things that Latinos do well and it is having those tight.
• 5:38
  Family and community bonds.
• 5:39
  Now, it is more difficult when the Latinos are living in the United States because of the way of life in the United States where there's a different value system than perhaps what I'm seeing now here in Mexico.
• 5:51
  So for example, in the United States, the value system is what can you produce, basically, and how much money?
• 5:57
  Can you make, and it's a hyper individualistic culture.
• 6:00
  Mexico, not so much.
• 6:02
  Okay.
• 6:02
  Again, because of the, in the Latin culture, it's like God, family and everything else, basically, uh, for the.
• 6:11
  Most part, so what's happened in the United States, right, is we had, for the last a hundred years all these things that basically ripped the communities apart.
• 6:21
  So the reason why we need these communities is, for example, let's say that the parents, for some reason are not able to.
• 6:27
  Give love to the child.
• 6:29
  Then you have the grandparents, you have the aunts, you have the uncles, you have the cousins, you have the neighbors, like there's fail safes in place.
• 6:36
  There's, there's redundancy plans in place, right?
• 6:40
  So how has this family structure basically been destroyed?
• 6:44
  Particularly in the West in the last a hundred years or so.
• 6:47
  And how has it affected men, in particular in Western culture and women as well?
• 6:52
  So number one, industrialization.
• 6:54
  So they took the men out of the home.
• 6:56
  We used to live in a lot more community, uh, oriented ways, which is.
• 7:00
  I think making a comeback.
• 7:02
  Uh, and I would not be surprised if we see more people living in communities and things moving forward in Western countries.
• 7:09
  'cause it's like the only way we're gonna survive, basically.
• 7:11
  Right.
• 7:12
  Um, and it's what creates healthy attachment, uh, in people and in future generations because again, those redundancies.
• 7:20
  Uh, are in place.
• 7:21
  So industrialization took the men outta the family home.
• 7:24
  'cause now you had to leave the home in order to go work and make money.
• 7:28
  So that was number one.
• 7:29
  We had World War I, world War I, we were, the western world was losing men at alarming numbers.
• 7:36
  So either the men died.
• 7:38
  Or they came back and they couldn't really function all that well because they were traumatized from what they saw out in war.
• 7:45
  So women have been stepping up more and more and more since that started to happen in western civilization.
• 7:52
  It did not start with feminism.
• 7:53
  It started way before feminism.
• 7:56
  Um, and a lot of people think that the 1950s housewife is like the epitome of femininity and number one, that was a uniquely American thing.
• 8:05
  Let's start there.
• 8:06
  And number two, those women were masculine as hell because at that point we'd already been through industrialization, a great depression, and two world wars, which have been destroying the men in Western culture.
• 8:19
  So what ends up happening, men come back from war.
• 8:23
  And either they die or they're non-functioning, or they're not functioning at healthy levels.
• 8:28
  So the women have to start stepping up.
• 8:30
  And here we go with everything that came after that, the 1950s housewife, feminism.
• 8:36
  There's a lot of other things that were involved in all of that.
• 8:39
  But basically this has been happening for decades and what's gone on is that the family system has been getting more and more and more.
• 8:47
  Uh, fragile in the United States, which has led to, according to Adam Lane Smith and his research, uh, two thirds of people having some sort of insecure attachment style.
• 8:59
  We have generations of attachment trauma.
• 9:02
  Basically that we are dealing with in the United States.
• 9:05
  It affected men insofar as they either died, uh, or they came back.
• 9:10
  We were very traumatized from things going on in the world, or they were taken outta the family home to go make money.
• 9:16
  And it affected women in the sense of, I can't rely on men.
• 9:20
  I am the one who has to go take care of stuff because I cannot rely on the men.
• 9:25
  In my life, and if you saw my last video about the Aubrey Marcus situation and why he's actually a feminized man.
• 9:31
  He talked a lot about, from his wife, he gets like masculine energy and from the side chick, he gets feminine energy.
• 9:36
  The man has no idea what he's talking about.
• 9:38
  Do not follow any of his.
• 9:40
  Relationship advice, but one of the things I said in that video was the fact that can women, uh, co-opt masculine energy, yes, it's a fail safe.
• 9:48
  So basically because if the men are unable to protect or provide for whatever reason, then the women can make sure the kids are okay.
• 9:56
  The women can make sure the community is okay, the tribe is okay.
• 9:59
  And everything keeps on functioning.
• 10:01
  So what we've seen going on in Western culture for the last a hundred years is that the men, for one reason or another, either were not in the home or were unable to protect and provide.
• 10:13
  So the women had to start bringing on that fail safe, right?
• 10:17
  That fail safe started to come online and it forced women.
• 10:21
  To go into more, uh, masculine uh, situations.
• 10:25
  Now, if you look at cultures in Latin America and Latina, we have tons of problems in Latin America when it comes to relationships.
• 10:32
  But I will tell you that those family and community bonds is not one of them.
• 10:36
  Um, we are convinced after living in Mexico, um, for some time that the reason like, you don't see homelessness out on the street in Mexico like you do in the United.
• 10:46
  States because the families would come in and make sure that somebody's okay or that somebody's taken care of before anything ever gets to that point.
• 10:55
  You don't see as many mental health issues here as you do in the United States.
• 10:58
  I should look up the exact statistics on that, but just from my experience living here, like you just don't see the stuff that we're seeing in the United States with people becoming fragile and breaking down and not knowing how to be in relationship.
• 11:12
  You don't see that.
• 11:13
  As much here in Mexico where we're living right now.
• 11:16
  And I'm convinced that it's because of those strong family and community bonds and the fact that it's not such a hyper individualistic culture.
• 11:24
  And that's actually one of the things, um, that my husband and I have in common because if you go to Eastern Europe, which is what I've learned from him, it's very similar, uh, in that sense.
• 11:34
  Uh, where there's strong community and family bonds, uh, with Eastern Europeans, uh, and Russians.
• 11:40
  So in that sense it's, it's very similar.
• 11:42
  And also if you go to Asia, that's one of the things that's very common there as well.
• 11:47
  So that kind of explains like the freaking mess.
• 11:51
  That we are in right now.
• 11:52
  So you can understand like what women are dealing with and also what men are dealing with.
• 11:57
  So you have men, uh, who have not been functioning well in the United States for some time, no fault of their own.
• 12:04
  Again, there's just like world stuff that was going on.
• 12:07
  There's generations who did not take care of the shit.
• 12:10
  And then, you know, all the children start, it just caused trauma upon trauma, upon more trauma.
• 12:16
  So now you have men out here who are totally confused either because in, in the most, uh, innocent.
• 12:22
  Of ways.
• 12:23
  It's just like, well, I'm equal to a woman.
• 12:25
  They're always yelling about equality.
• 12:26
  I need to go 50 50 or else, like, I'm not honoring her as a woman, which is nonsense.
• 12:31
  Uh, or at the worst of the situation, you have the red pill guys.
• 12:36
  The red pill guys.
• 12:37
  If you really pay attention to what's going on, and you'll see them fighting with me in the comments here sometimes.
• 12:42
  'cause I teach women how to have self-esteem and not date them.
• 12:44
  Um, they're not ready for dating.
• 12:46
  They're not ready.
• 12:47
  For marriage.
• 12:48
  A lot of times those are men who had an anxious attachment style.
• 12:52
  This is according to Adam Lane and his research.
• 12:54
  Adam Lane Smith and his research, they had an anxious attachment style.
• 12:58
  A lot of times they have horrible relationships with the women in their lives.
• 13:01
  Their mothers may have abused them or maybe it was a single mom'cause she really had to step up.
• 13:06
  Or some men have admitted this in the comment section of this YouTube channel, uh, where it was a weak father and an overly controlling mother, and at the worst of it, it was an abusive mother or a mother with personality disorders.
• 13:18
  And if you listen to a lot of the red pill content and what they're telling men.
• 13:22
  They're just dealing with women on this, on the spectrum of like, this woman has a personality disorder.
• 13:27
  Like I remember, um, watching, uh, some of the Red Pill podcasts back in the day'cause a really popular one.
• 13:34
  Films in Miami, the fresh and fit.
• 13:36
  And I would see like the, and I'm from Miami.
• 13:38
  I was born and raised there.
• 13:39
  And I would see the panel that they would put and I'd be like, did you just find the dumbest, most scarred, traumatized women in all of Miami?
• 13:47
  To go on this podcast.
• 13:49
  And that's exactly what they're doing because that's what they think.
• 13:51
  Um, all women are.
• 13:53
  So basically, um, and the pickup guys would do this too.
• 13:56
  Remember I did that video about the men to avoid, well, here's what's going on with those men.
• 14:00
  They were anxiously attached.
• 14:02
  Then they get into pickup or now pickups turn into red pill, and then they're being taught how to be, uh, avoidant.
• 14:08
  So then they use these avoidant uh, strategies.
• 14:11
  Uh, on usually insecure anxiously attached women.
• 14:16
  So a lot of times you'll see the red pill guys being like, they have to go 50 50.
• 14:20
  She needs to take care of herself.
• 14:21
  I'm not paying for shit.
• 14:22
  Uh, I had one guy recently on a, on a comment and say he wouldn't even go into an elevator with a woman.
• 14:30
  Like that's how damaged these people, these men are in terms of their relationship to women.
• 14:36
  And I had another one saying that women have always been like the.
• 14:39
  Wives or daughters or spawn of Satan or something.
• 14:42
  So like it, I'm saying this so that you have compassion for these guys, right?
• 14:47
  Have compassion for them because they're clearly not doing well and men haven't been doing well for a long time.
• 14:53
  And women also haven't been doing well, but women were at least able to co-opt masculine energy and at least.
• 15:00
  Make money and at least get some sort of benefit, uh, to all of this where men haven't really been getting those benefits at all.
• 15:09
  It's quite the opposite.
• 15:10
  They've been demonized, uh, in a lot of ways, and they've been told that they're not needed and they've been told it is, it is just a mess out here.
• 15:17
  And I say that again.
• 15:18
  So you have compassion for these men.
• 15:19
  That does not mean you date these men though.
• 15:23
  Okay?
• 15:24
  Let's be clear.
• 15:25
  It does not mean you date them because you're definitely not ready for dating and they're certainly not ready.
• 15:29
  Um, to be married, but we need to understand what we're dealing with when it comes to these sorts of, of topics because again, it helps you have compassion, but it also helps to you have a better understanding of what is going on and perhaps how, um, you relate to that.
• 15:45
  Okay.
• 15:45
  Hold on.
• 15:46
  I lost where I was.
• 15:48
  Oh, here we go.
• 15:49
  Okay, so that's the problem, right?
• 15:51
  We, we have this massive societal issue where we have like crumbs.
• 15:56
  I recently said like, gen Z is, is, is really having a hard time right now because my God, is the fabric of Western society really struggling at the moment, especially when it comes to relationships.
• 16:07
  It's just causing more and more and more trauma, which is one of the reasons why I wanted to start this channel, to start healing those things because when we start healing.
• 16:15
  Our relationships with, with ourselves, and then within our romantic partnerships, we start creating safer environments for right now and also for future generations because that's the exact opposite of what's been going on for the last a hundred or so years.
• 16:29
  Now that you understand how the men ended up here.
• 16:32
  Right.
• 16:32
  Or some men ended up in this space.
• 16:34
  Let's go into why you keep attracting them.
• 16:36
  So there's an energy mismatch, right?
• 16:38
  A lot of times you are either operating from masculine energy, so you're providing, controlling and doing any everything.
• 16:45
  So what that does is that it will, it will repel the healthy men, um, who want to protect and provide for you, but it's going to bring in the feminized.
• 16:54
  Men.
• 16:55
  The other thing that's going on is a lot of women, uh, again, this is according to Adam Lane Smith, and the work that he's done have an anxious attachment style.
• 17:02
  So these feminized men who have avoid, who have been taught, they didn't necessarily start with avoidant attachment styles.
• 17:09
  They, a lot of times they started with an anxious attachment style and realize that two thirds of people right now have.
• 17:15
  Insecure attachment styles, at least in the United States.
• 17:17
  I don't know what it's like, um, in other parts of the world, but we're talking about Western culture right now.
• 17:22
  Um, and let's be real.
• 17:23
  Western culture pushes all this shit in Hollywood, all over the world.
• 17:27
  It's like the number one export of the United States other than dollars is Hollywood.
• 17:31
  You can go anywhere in the world and you can see entertainment from the United States, and the entertainment definitely pushes more of the toxicity, and then that affects other parts.
• 17:41
  Of the world, but basically what's going on is a lot of times women have more of an anxious attachment style.
• 17:47
  And then now the guys who started with anxious attachment styles, but they're being taught to have avoidant attachment styles.
• 17:53
  See you as a target.
• 17:55
  So that's part of what's going on.
• 17:57
  So if you start healing your own attachment style, and I talk about this a lot with the level one, level two, and level three high value woman.
• 18:05
  A lot of it is nervous system regulation.
• 18:06
  When you start regulating your nervous system and you start working.
• 18:10
  Through your core wounds and healing those, what ends up happening is you end up becoming more secure in your attachment style and you end up becoming healthier, and then you'll naturally start attracting healthier men.
• 18:20
  Right?
• 18:21
  So the other thing that might be going on is you could be sending the wrong signals.
• 18:25
  So you're attracting men who wanna be taking care of, not men who wanna take care of you.
• 18:29
  And again, I just described how men got here so you could understand what we're dealing with.
• 18:35
  The other thing that might.
• 18:37
  Continue to attract these men into your life is a scarcity mindset.
• 18:40
  So again, a lot of women have an anxious attachment style.
• 18:43
  What does that lead to?
• 18:44
  A scarcity mindset.
• 18:45
  And you accept it because you don't believe that you deserve more or that there's others out there.
• 18:50
  And then finally there's the independence trap.
• 18:52
  How did we get to the independence trap again, the a hundred years of just the total dismantling of communities that we've been seeing in Western culture has forced women to be more independent.
• 19:04
  And then it got.
• 19:05
  Taken to other levels, right?
• 19:08
  So you're so independent.
• 19:10
  That providers don't feel needed, right?
• 19:12
  They don't feel like you need them.
• 19:13
  And what do healthy masculine men want to do?
• 19:16
  They wanna give to you and they wanna be your hero, and they wanna feel needed and they want to feel appreciated.
• 19:21
  So we have a whole hot mess going on here that we have to start working through.
• 19:26
  So here are the common patterns, right?
• 19:28
  It's men who always wanna split the bill 50 50, and they're asking you for that.
• 19:32
  Um, it's men, it's you, right?
• 19:34
  Planning and, and paying for dates instead of the men doing it.
• 19:38
  It's men who forget their wallets.
• 19:40
  It's the men in my comment section.
• 19:41
  Sometimes, like I said, I won't even get in an elevator with a woman or women or the spawn of Satan or the red pill guys.
• 19:48
  Um, it's guys who expect you to provide emotional and financial support.
• 19:53
  Do not get with men who expect you to work, get with men who don't want you to have to work.
• 19:59
  That's the key here, ladies and relationships.
• 20:02
  Um, and it's relationships where you're the giver and he's a taker, right?
• 20:06
  So again, a lot of these men, um, because of all this trauma that we've been through as a society and what we're left with now.
• 21:15
  Um, they're learning how to be takers and harvesting that feminine energy.
• 21:20
  Now the good news is, I forgot to mention, the good news is that a lot of men don't end up there.
• 21:24
  They don't stay there for very long.
• 21:26
  So for example, my husband, um, had that exact same thing.
• 21:30
  He grew up in a household where, uh, there was addiction on the side of his father.
• 21:35
  So it was like the weak man, a non-functioning man.
• 21:38
  And then his mother has a personality disorder.
• 21:42
  Right.
• 21:42
  So he grew up in a lot of chaos.
• 21:44
  So he ended up being anxiously attached, right?
• 21:47
  Because it's usually through the mother where it ends up happening with, with the guy.
• 21:51
  And then he ends up, he's older, right?
• 21:53
  So for him, it was the pickup.
• 21:54
  It wasn't red pill, uh, pickup just turned into red pill, and he started doing that.
• 21:59
  And then he learned all these avoidant attachment styles.
• 22:01
  Now, by the time he met me, he was long gone.
• 22:04
  From all of this, but he's like, honestly, it just makes you feel like a shitty person.
• 22:09
  So if there's a red pill guy watching this, right?
• 22:12
  Um, and you're starting to feel like shit because you feel like you're just manipulating women and you're a dog and you're still not getting the wife and you're still not getting the healthy relationship and you're still gonna end up in divorce court.
• 22:22
  By the way, if you follow the red pill content, just know that you don't have to stay there.
• 22:27
  And there's now a lot of men who were in that world, um, pickup, um, in the pickup world, who've since.
• 22:34
  Said, Hey, this is bad news.
• 22:36
  Don't do this.
• 22:37
  And they're coming out and they're doing content, uh, for men that is actually healthy in response to the insanity that we're seeing for the red pill.
• 22:45
  So good news on two fronts.
• 22:47
  Number one, a lot of the men who start in red pill and pick up and all those kinds of things, they don't stay there.
• 22:52
  They usually end up feeling like a shitty person because they're being taught to be a shitty person.
• 22:57
  And that consciousness eventually, uh, kicks in and then they start looking for other ways to start.
• 23:03
  That's starting to happen more and more where they're starting to be wanting something healthier.
• 23:07
  And also there are now men who are starting to learn from other men.
• 23:11
  Who got out of that world and out of that space.
• 23:14
  My husband's one of them by the way, and that's one of the reasons he wants to start coming on this channel.
• 23:19
  Um, to help me and also talk about relationships because he was the typical pipeline where it was anxiously attached from a traumatic, uh, household and childhood.
• 23:29
  Um, a mother with a personality disorder and a weak father, uh, may he rest in peace and anxiously attached and ends up.
• 23:37
  And pick up learning how to be avoidant and then spends a few years manipulating women until he realizes like, Hey, this is horrible.
• 23:44
  And then had to go learn what a healthy man was.
• 23:47
  So there's hope.
• 23:48
  That's what I'm trying to say.
• 23:50
  I didn't mention that before.
• 23:51
  Very important.
• 23:52
  There is hope, right?
• 23:54
  So now let's get into understanding provider men, right?
• 23:58
  So here's what provider.
• 23:59
  Protector.
• 24:00
  Healthy, masculine men actually want, they want to feel needed, right?
• 24:05
  So they wanna solve problems and make your life easier.
• 24:09
  They wanna be your hero.
• 24:10
  They want to feel successful.
• 24:12
  So they get satisfaction from providing and protecting.
• 24:15
  And one of the core drivers of men.
• 24:17
  Which I cover all the cord drivers of men in my Feminine Magnetism Mastery program, um, is protecting and providing because that's what ensured their survival and their status for thousands of years, and it's still what ensures their status in a lot of ways.
• 24:32
  It's also appreciation, right?
• 24:34
  They want to feel like their efforts are acknowledged and valued.
• 24:38
  A lot of women don't appreciate men, and it's like those of you who are married and you're like, how do I get him to stop being lazy?
• 24:44
  Or, how do I get him to step up?
• 24:45
  Just start appreciating him all the time and watch, whoop, watch that turn around real quick, and then it's feminine energy, right?
• 24:52
  They're attracted to women who can receive.
• 24:55
  Gracefully.
• 24:56
  Okay.
• 24:57
  They don't want to be takers.
• 24:59
  They want to be givers.
• 25:00
  And a lot of the unhealthy men, which we described, how they got unhealthy and what they end up in and why, again, so you understand and have compassion, but don't date them, uh, when they're in that space and they're in that phase of their lives.
• 25:15
  Um.
• 25:15
  What happens is they're the ones who end up giving the, being the takers and make, they put women in the position where they have to be the giver.
• 25:23
  So now let's get into that.
• 25:24
  Let's get into the difference between a provider and a user.
• 25:27
  So provider men are naturally generous in giving.
• 25:30
  They take pride in taking care of their women and their families, and they see providing as an expression of love, and they want to be your hero and your protector.
• 25:40
  Now, user men, right?
• 25:41
  Men who take from you these unhealthy men.
• 25:45
  Basically they look for women to take care of them.
• 25:49
  They expect 50 50 for you to pay more, or they expect, in some cases y'all are paying all the bills for a man who ain't doing shit, right.
• 25:57
  So that's going on.
• 25:58
  Uh, they see your resources as their resources.
• 26:01
  This is important, right?
• 26:02
  Whatever money I make, um, my husband does not expect that to go into paying for anything, right?
• 26:09
  I just got a tax refund.
• 26:10
  For example, from last year, like a surprise tax refund I wasn't expecting.
• 26:15
  It's all going into my savings accounts.
• 26:16
  That's not being used to pay for anything in this household.
• 26:20
  But a taker would be like, you gotta gimme half of that for the bills.
• 26:23
  Right?
• 26:24
  And a lot of the unhealthy men, they want a mother figure, not a partner.
• 26:28
  Mature, healthy, masculine men do not want a mother figure.
• 26:31
  And remember how I said early on?
• 26:33
  A lot of the unhealthy men, they have horrible relationships with their mothers.
• 26:37
  Again, not their faults.
• 26:38
  I went through how we ended up here as a society.
• 26:42
  Uh, but I I'm glad that there, I'm glad that there's more men out there now talking to those men because when I learned that about the red pill guys and just the state of affairs with men right now, like my heart ached.
• 26:54
  If I'm being honest, like it really ached.
• 26:56
  Um, it just ached for society, period.
• 26:59
  And then it just kind of gave me more fuel and more motivation to keep putting these videos out for you guys.
• 27:04
  So now let's go into the emperors energy mindset, right?
• 27:08
  If y'all have done any of my trainings, you know, I prefer emperors to queen, right?
• 27:11
  Like Queen is cool, but we're going for empires, right?
• 27:14
  We're going for the queen of all queens.
• 27:16
  Uh, the empress.
• 27:17
  So the mind first, mind shift, right?
• 27:19
  Is you deserve to be provided for.
• 27:22
  A lot of women don't feel like they deserve to be provided for all the reasons I mentioned.
• 27:26
  They also don't think they're worthy of it.
• 27:28
  They're thinking about fairness'cause they don't understand a masculine uh, and feminine energy dynamics and the psychology between men and women, women.
• 27:37
  So a lot of women just don't feel worthy.
• 27:39
  So you have to change the belief to I am worthy.
• 27:42
  Of being cherished, uh, and provided for, and I would add in another one.
• 27:45
  A lot of women feel like if they're being provided for, then a man is going to control them.
• 27:50
  And I wanna say something about that because I understand it, because that used to be me.
• 27:54
  Okay.
• 27:55
  I get it.
• 27:56
  So I wanna say something about that real quick.
• 27:58
  So number one is the fact that a healthy man who is providing.
• 28:02
  Uh, so he's paying all the bills, he's managing the money, he's making those decisions.
• 28:06
  He's not going to keep you in the dark, right?
• 28:08
  So, for example, my husband pays the bills.
• 28:11
  My husband, um, makes most of the money my husband, um.
• 28:16
  You know, he's the one who sets the investments and the plan and all that kind of stuff.
• 28:19
  He pulled me into the office this morning.
• 28:21
  He's like, Hey, I wanna show you where everything is, right?
• 28:24
  Uh, they put your name on his accounts, he shows you where everything is.
• 28:29
  He's like, here's where we're at, here's where we're going.
• 28:31
  So like healthy provider men are not going to use money to control you.
• 28:35
  They're actually gonna let you know what's going on.
• 28:37
  So for those of you who are afraid.
• 28:40
  Of a man being a provider, because he's going to control the purse strings.
• 28:44
  It's not like that With healthy men, healthy men are going to make you a part of the process.
• 28:49
  They're not going to leave you in the dark, and if you have questions, they will happily answer them.
• 28:54
  So I just wanted to calm that anxiety that some of you have, because I too used to have that anxiety.
• 29:00
  So.
• 29:00
  Here's the the, let's get back to the belief I am worthy of being cherished and provided for.
• 29:05
  So basically you have to accepting less than generous treatment, and you have to get very good at receiving.
• 29:10
  And I know a lot of you struggle with that, so you have to get really, really good at it because the result is that you're naturally going to attract men who want to give to.
• 29:20
  Okay.
• 29:21
  The second mindset shift is receiving is a feminine power.
• 29:24
  So when you allow him to provide, it makes him feel masculine and successful.
• 29:29
  When he feels masculine and successful, he wants to keep giving you more and he wants to commit to you.
• 29:35
  So you wanna learn how to grace.
• 29:36
  Fully receive his gifts, efforts and generosity.
• 29:39
  And the result is he feels addicted to making you happy and that's all they really wanna do.
• 29:44
  The next mindset shift is your presence is the gift.
• 29:48
  So the belief here is my feminine energy and presence are valuable, and the action to take is you show up as the prize, not the pursuer, and then the result is that men compete.
• 29:59
  To win your attention and affection.
• 30:02
  And that's why I tell a lot of women to do that divine masculine energy experiment, um, that I've been talking about in several videos in all of my trainings.
• 30:09
  The next mindset shift is standards create attraction.
• 30:12
  So the belief is high standards attract high value men.
• 30:16
  The action is only accept treatment that matches your worth.
• 30:20
  You have to become a lot more discerning about how men treat you, and you have to get really clear on your standards and your values and what it is that you actually want in a partnership in life, and then use that as your lens of discernment.
• 30:32
  And the result is that low value men will eliminate themselves, and the providers are going to step.
• 30:38
  Uh, so here's some practical strategies, right?
• 30:41
  There's gonna be a long one.
• 30:42
  Practical strategies are let him lead and provide, right?
• 30:45
  So in dating you let the men plan and pay for dates.
• 30:48
  When it comes to problems, allow him to solve it.
• 30:51
  When it comes to decisions, ask for his input and his guidance, and when it comes to daily life, accept his help and offers gracefully.
• 30:58
  The second strategy is.
• 31:00
  Expressing appreciation, not expectation.
• 31:02
  I, so good.
• 31:04
  A good example would be like, I love how generous you are.
• 31:07
  A bad example would be, you should pay for dinner.
• 31:10
  A good example would be, thank you for taking such good care of me.
• 31:13
  A bad example would be it's about time you stepped up, which most basic women.
• 31:18
  That's what they're doing.
• 31:19
  The third strategy is creating space for his generosity.
• 31:23
  So you don't wanna rush to pay or split everything.
• 31:26
  I know a lot of you wanna do that, right?
• 31:28
  You gotta sit down.
• 31:29
  Um, what you and what you do wanna do is pause and let him offer first.
• 31:34
  What you don't wanna do is solve all your own problems.
• 31:36
  And what you do wanna do is share challenges and let him help.
• 31:39
  I did a lot of that, uh, when my husband and I were dating and then they feel like you're hero within 90 days.
• 31:45
  My husband knew he wanted to commit to me.
• 31:47
  It does not take that long for them to figure it out, ladies.
• 31:50
  It really doesn't.
• 31:51
  The next strategy is embody feminine.
• 31:54
  Receiving energy, so the body language is open, it's relaxed, it's receptive.
• 31:58
  The communication is thank you, instead of you don't have to or you shouldn't have.
• 32:03
  The energy is soft, appreciative, and graceful, and the mindset is worthy of being cherished and provided for.
• 32:09
  Now, here's what not to do.
• 32:11
  Okay, so here's, you wanna avoid these behaviors because they repel healthy provider men being too independent that I don't need any one energy.
• 32:21
  And I know that when we've been dealing with everything I mentioned in the beginning of this video, it's very difficult to do that.
• 32:28
  But the reality is, is I do feel that in Western culture we're gonna come back to a lot of the stuff that was working.
• 32:35
  Over a hundred years ago, because that's what makes a sustainable society.
• 32:39
  So start with you, right, by letting go of the mis independent thing.
• 32:44
  And then the other thing you wanna avoid is controlling everything.
• 32:47
  So the planning, the paying, the managing of the relationship.
• 32:51
  You wanna stop rejecting his effort.
• 32:53
  So instead of saying, uh, I can do it myself, where you don't have to receive it and appreciate him for the effort and you wanna stop testing his generosity.
• 33:02
  What do I mean by testing his generosity?
• 33:04
  By demanding or expecting without appreciation?
• 33:07
  And you wanna stop acting in your own masculine energy.
• 33:10
  So competing with him instead of complimenting him, because this is about two different energies that have to learn how to dance with each other, not two of the same energy.
• 33:19
  And then here are the red flags where, you know, you just gotta cut it off with the dues.
• 33:23
  So the men who expect you to pay on dates, guys who forget their wallet repeatedly.
• 33:28
  Men who want to split everything 50 50 from the beginning, guys who expect you to provide for them, and men who take, but never, ever give.
• 33:38
  Those are all red flags.
• 33:39
  Stay away from these men.
• 33:41
  Now I know what you're thinking.
• 33:42
  You're like, oh my God, this sounds great, but how do I actually embody this empress energy?
• 33:47
  How do I shift?
• 33:48
  From the masculine to the feminine energy.
• 33:50
  How do I raise my standards without being demanding?
• 33:54
  How do I do this Dance of nuance?
• 33:57
  So one of the things that you want to start off with is the Feminine Magnetism Mastery Program.
• 34:02
  It's only$27.
• 34:04
  It's like three or four hours of content where I go really deep into the psychology of all of this stuff, and you really are gonna start understanding like from first date all the way through commitment.
• 34:15
  What the psychology looks like, what those steps are, how to embody your feminine energy at the different stages, how to communicate at the different stages and what should be happening in the different stages.
• 34:25
  So you can grab that below.
• 34:27
  Because once you understand these things, it's like I said, you can start attracting healthy provider men like that.
• 34:34
  So it's only$27 and it's everything you need.
• 34:37
  In order to understand what is going on with the psychology of healthy provider men and how you can become the woman who actually attracts them, all you gotta do is click the link in the description and final word here.
• 34:50
  You have to remember that you are worthy of being cherished, provided for, and treated like the queen that you are.
• 34:56
  The right man is out there.
• 34:57
  He will protect and provide for you, and he's looking for a woman who knows her worth and can receive his love.
• 35:04
  Gracefully, and if you are one of these, like I can't rely on men, you have to start changing that story, and I understand why you feel that way, especially now understanding the history of how we got here as a society.
• 35:18
  I totally get it and I totally understand it, but that's one of the first core beliefs that.
• 35:24
  Have to start changing if you have any snowballs chance in hell of even, um, attracting one of the healthy men to begin with.
• 35:32
  So if this video opened your eyes on the state of society right now, where we are in relationships.
• 35:38
  And why you've been attracting the wrong men, then make sure to give this a thumbs up.
• 35:43
  It helps us put it in front of more women.
• 35:45
  Please make sure to share it with a girlfriend.
• 35:47
  'cause there's a lot of confusion out here that I'm trying to dispel because I honestly believe that once we start becoming healthier ourselves, we become healthier in our relationships and then that creates a better society and a better chance for future generations.
• 36:02
  Because right now, gen Z is really struggling.
• 36:05
  Because of everything that I mentioned in the beginning parts of this video.
• 36:09
  Now let me know in the comments what was your biggest takeaway with attracting provider men?
• 36:13
  And make sure to subscribe for more content on attracting high value generous men who love to provide.
• 36:20
  Please stop being the provider in your relationships.
• 36:22
  Please stop paying men basically to be with you and start being the woman who is provided for because you deserve it.