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What role does communication play in boundaries? · Wellbeing Solutions - Ask A Counsellor

• 0:04
  SPEAKER_00: So healthy boundaries are the limits that we set to protect our own emotional well-being and physical well-being as well.
• 0:13
  SPEAKER_00: They're not about pushing people away, they're about creating relationships built on mutual respect and understanding.
• 0:19
  SPEAKER_00: If you think of boundaries as the guidelines that help others know what we're comfortable with and what we're not, that can be quite effective in figuring them out.
• 0:27
  SPEAKER_00: For example, it's fine to say I need some time to myself after work or I'm not comfortable discussing that topic right now.
• 0:34
  SPEAKER_00: Setting boundaries isn't selfish, it's as part of addressing and highlighting your capacity to your partner, and it helps prevent stress and burnout.
• 0:46
  SPEAKER_00: Also, resentment, which happens when we're given beyond capacity.
• 0:49
  SPEAKER_00: Of course, boundaries work best when they're communicated clearly, and that's where effective communication comes in.
• 0:56
  SPEAKER_00: So good communication means expressing ourselves honestly while also listening with empathy.
• 1:02
  SPEAKER_00: One helpful counselling skill that we can utilize in this regard is saying I statements.
• 1:08
  SPEAKER_00: So instead of saying you never listen to me, try saying I feel unheard when I'm interrupted.
• 1:14
  SPEAKER_00: This reduces blame and encourages a more open conversation.
• 1:18
  SPEAKER_00: Active listening is another key skill.
• 1:21
  SPEAKER_00: Rather than thinking about what you're gonna say next, fully focus on what the other person's saying.
• 1:27
  SPEAKER_00: Pay attention to the words, the tone, and the emotions.
• 1:30
  SPEAKER_00: Sometimes people don't need solutions, they need to be heard and understood, and quite often our need to give immediate solutions comes from our own discomfort.
• 1:39
  SPEAKER_00: Setting healthy boundaries can sometimes feel uncomfortable, especially if that's rooted in disappointing others.
• 1:45
  SPEAKER_00: But remember, people who respect you will learn to respect your boundaries.
• 1:49
  SPEAKER_00: Healthy relationships involve compromise, not sacrifice of your well-being.
• 1:54
  SPEAKER_00: It's also important to recognise that boundaries can change over time.
• 1:59
  SPEAKER_00: As relationships grow and circumstances change, it's completely okay to revisit conversations and adjust your boundaries.
• 2:06
  SPEAKER_00: Open and honest communication helps make that possible.
• 2:09
  SPEAKER_00: In counselling, we often say that healthy relationships aren't about avoiding conflict, they're about handling conflict respectfully.
• 2:16
  SPEAKER_00: Clear communication, empathy, and healthy boundaries create a safe environment where both people feel valued, respected, and able to be themselves.
• 2:25
  SPEAKER_00: So here's one thing to take away Ask yourself are my boundaries clear and am I communicating them with kindness and confidence?
• 2:34
  SPEAKER_00: Small conversations today can lead to stronger, healthier relationships in the future.