Latest / Good Morning From The Chicken Coop! / What you say is rarely aligned to what you think
Transcript
- 0:02Welcome to the good morning from the chicken coop, podcast with
- 0:04Kim Johnson, your creative strategist and master mindset.
- 0:08Coach filled with inspiration, distinctions, perspectives and
- 0:11possibilities. We help you to cultivate a
- 0:14mindset that leads you to create the best version of yourself.
- 0:17You could ever imagine join Kim. Every morning from one of her.
- 0:20Favorite happy places her chicken coop, along with all her
- 0:23chickens. Hey, good morning everybody.
- 0:28Welcome to the chicken coop. Is General observation day.
- 0:33And that big one for today, is that most of us rarely are
- 0:40aligned with what we say, we believe.
- 0:44So what do I mean by that? We are rarely aligned with what
- 0:47we say we believe. So there are always filters
- 0:51running in the background different emotions.
- 0:54As we've talked about them before, who's driving your bus?
- 0:56There are always different emotions.
- 0:58And as I've told you, you can have multiple oceans at the same
- 1:01time and sometimes will refer to these as filters and things
- 1:05going on in the back of your head.
- 1:08So to speak. But there is a predominant
- 1:12situation that takes place with human beings where the words
- 1:15that come out of our mouths are not necessarily aligned to what
- 1:18we believe. And part of that challenge that
- 1:22we have is that we're constantly filtering for what other people
- 1:25think, how we have to show up the thing, the game we have to
- 1:29play to make sure. We don't offend people say the
- 1:32wrong thing, show up the wrong way.
- 1:35And so a lot of us fact, most of us, have a predominant situation
- 1:41where we are misaligned, where we will have words come out of
- 1:45our mouths. But those words not technically
- 1:48in line with what our true beliefs are, if you've ever seen
- 1:51the movie Liar Liar, with Jim Carrey.
- 1:53This is a funny version of a take on this, where it's
- 1:57everything that's inside of him that he wants to say.
- 2:00He doesn't say in the beginning he's just this incredible liar,
- 2:04that just lies about everything but then his son puts a curse on
- 2:07him and wishes him to be able to only tell the truth.
- 2:11And he just can't speak anything.
- 2:13But the truth, it's actually a very cute movie with a very cute
- 2:16premise. And it's kind of like what
- 2:18happens to us internally where we want to say something but we
- 2:22have to filter it. We want to say these words but
- 2:26we don't know how to say them constructively or in a way that
- 2:30wouldn't hurt Person's feelings because I believe most of us are
- 2:33good and we don't want to hurt other people's feelings.
- 2:35So we try to find a way to say things and the best format we
- 2:38possibly can, although it's not always resourceful.
- 2:41But then a big chunk for where we are is that we just shut up?
- 2:46Totally misaligned and we don't say the truth and then we wonder
- 2:50why we have struggles with people.
- 2:52We wonder why we have these awkward interactions with
- 2:56people. It's because somehow we are
- 2:58misaligned with what we really believe in.
- 3:00What? We want to say to them.
- 3:02So it causes an energetic Rift, if you will, between where we
- 3:07are emotionally with them, and what we truly believe and where
- 3:11we are on this plane with them where we're trying to, you know,
- 3:16interact with them, speak with them, have it work with them but
- 3:19we just can't. And we say, what is the problem?
- 3:21And we try to force it on another person.
- 3:23But the truth is we're not always saying how we really feel
- 3:27we're just not speaking the truth and therefore that's where
- 3:30the struggle. Zen.
- 3:31And I'm not saying to go out and insult everybody and say
- 3:34everything that you think what I'm saying is we have to become
- 3:36Artful about it and figure out why we think what we think.
- 3:40So that we can then figure out how to become aligned.
- 3:43Look at this really closely in your most personal relationships
- 3:48because this is where it really is a challenge, because we will
- 3:51be frustrated with Partners. We will be frustrated with
- 3:54children. We will be frustrated with
- 3:56family members and we just can't figure out.
- 4:00ER, out how to communicate with them.
- 4:03Because we're in our own place, they're in their own place, and
- 4:07the struggle is real, we can't get them to see through our
- 4:10filters, but if you pause and you remember the rule, when
- 4:14emotions, go up intelligence goes down and you pull yourself
- 4:17back from trying to influence somebody else into understanding
- 4:21where you are when you are emotionally elevated then, you
- 4:27know, that's a bad time to do it at that point in time when you
- 4:30Emotionally elevated and you are trying so hard to get them to
- 4:35understand you. Most likely your intelligence is
- 4:38low at that point and you're not capable of articulating
- 4:41everything that you want. So you can't do it at that point
- 4:43in time. You have to do it.
- 4:44When it's the neutral zone, you have to call a family meeting.
- 4:47You have to get together with your crew and sit down and do it
- 4:52when nobody is emotionally elevated.
- 4:54And there's not a pending, you know, situation that everyone
- 4:58needs to discuss at a heightened level.
- 5:00And then you will be able to tell the truth, you will be able
- 5:03to articulate yourself. You will be able to make
- 5:06decisions about how you want to communicate, but it's always
- 5:09best to do these before. You have a, you know, an actual
- 5:13situation arise and sit down and debrief yourself.
- 5:16Where is the showing up? Where am I misaligned with my
- 5:19beliefs, and what I'm saying? And how I'm acting out with
- 5:21people? And I promise you, if you do
- 5:23this, your relationships are going to get infinitely better.
- 5:26So I hope you guys have a fantastic day.
- 5:30About this and get some clarity for yourself about where your
- 5:34misaligned and you don't have to take immediate action with it
- 5:37because you should sit with it. You should decide on it before
- 5:40you actually do it because remember, don't do it, when your
- 5:42emotions are high because when emotions go up intelligence goes
- 5:45down. So, I will speak to you guys
- 5:47tomorrow and I hope you have a blessed day.
- 5:49Bye.