Latest / overslept w/ chris laker / deep breath - oct 11 2026
Transcript
- Chris Laker: Take a deep breath. I just took one, so I'm not gonna do it on camera, but you take one. You just took one a little while ago. I don't care, take another one. Take a deep breath, hold it for five seconds. You no you take five sec you inhale for five seconds. Okay, start over. Inhale for five seconds, then you hold it for five seconds, and you exhale for five seconds. you could do eight. maybe sometimes they tell you to do eight, do five. we'll be centered. We'll be ready to handle the news of today. You know, it's Sunday, let's be cool. I wake up sometimes with things on my mind. I'm not gonna talk about all those right now, 'cause bad headspace, negative headspace. News is negative enough. Let's go into it just, you know, affirmation. You are really good. That's an affirmation. That's not one of the ones they typically give, but it is an affirmation. you look in the mirror and say, Yeah, I'm really good. Or I'm not the best, but I'm pretty good. You don't want to go too hard on the affirmation, I don't think. You know, you don't want to get full of yourself. Say yeah, I'm all right. You know, I'm I'm doing something. I I'm doing my best. I mean I'm not doing my best, but it's close to my best. Sometimes I I say I'm doing my best, but i I'm actually kinda not. I'm scrolling on my phone and saying I'm doing my best later when someone I'm I'm doing my best. A lot of scrolling. I could scroll less. I'm not gonna. I'm not gonna turn on that screen time shit on my phone that tells me how long I spend on an app. No, I don't wanna know about that. That will make me feel bad. That's not an affirmation. That's the opposite. So we're all we're all doing okay. we try our best sometimes. Other times, you know, you need a little break from trying your best. That's not so bad. you're great, I'm great, and we're gonna get into the news. Wildlife Park confirms tiger will not be euthanized after man mauled to death. that's good news. This is a wildlife park in England. Guy was mauled to death in the wildlife park. If you are in a position to get mauled to death by a tiger, it's jungle rules. tiger is not king of the jungle, to a person might as well be king of the jungle. all the animals are king of the jungle to a person. They will all kill you. Even like cute ones. the tiger's probably gonna be a big star at this wildlife park. People are gonna wanna see the tiger that killed a person. Attendance is definitely gonna go up This is great publicity for them. It's sad that this person was mauled to death. I don't know how they got into the position to get mauled by a tiger, you gotta stay away from a fucking tiger dude Not to get down on the guy, he died. Tiger gets to live. Tiger gets a little bit of a raw deal here because tiger killed the prey, you don't get to eat the prey. That would be wrong. if the tiger ate the guy You gotta sent the tiger back into the jungle everybody go check out this wildlife park and see if you can get a picture with that tiger. Pope Leo says he will undergo surgery to remove a nodule on his lung. He's 71, which is very young for a Pope. He's a kid. He'll bounce right back from this. I would like to know where he's going to get the nodule removed. I want to find out all the Pope doctors, because those are the best doctors. That's where I'm going. The Pope has got some health insurance. I don't like to go to the doctor. But if I had the Pope's doctor, then I would be going in for a checkup. I'd be asking about the Pope. I can't tell you. It's confidential. Come on. Let me take a look at the Pope's records. Let me take a look at the Pope's blood test. I when I worked in a doctor's office I love to look at people's medical records. I would just read them on my lunch break for fun. And when I was supposed to be working, I would end up reading a lot of them for fun. I would love to read the Pope's medical records. I never had anybody notable's medical records, just regular people, and those are interesting. I wanna know about the Pope. don't even usually see a doctor It's always a nurse practitioner. doctors I don't know what they the doctors just like hang out in their office the Pope probably gets a real doctor, every time he goes into the office. Nothing against a nurse practitioner. Nurse practitioner's great. Nurse practitioner knows everything. But yet not a doctor. Doctor? What's the doctor doing? Every once in a while a doctor will pop in. Hey, yeah, pretty good, huh? All right. Yeah, nice to see ya. Hi five. I gotta go just say hi to people and then go back to my office I do a lot of doctor stuff in that office so much that I can't see patients. I would love to see patients, but takes up too much of my time from the doctor stuff that happens in the office. I gotta look at tests. Panama declares state of emergency as powerful quake aftershocks rattle communities seven point seven and six point six in magnitude. We are in control of nothing as people. There's tigers, there's nodes, there's earthquakes. You just going about your day Earth says no, not today. This is all gonna be fucked up now. it looks pretty bad, this earthquake. A lot of rebuilding, which of course is what I fear the most about an earthquake. The rebuilding. The shoveling. The clearing of the roads. Everybody's gotta chip in. everybody's gotta chip in. I guess I'll chip in. what else you gonna do? The internet's probably down. Might as well go out clear debris. Man hospitalized after being struck by vehicle driven by Ice Agent Doring Chase. it looks like the ICE agents intentionally ran him over. So now they're weaponizing vehicles. You can't attack their weaponized vehicle. They can weaponize a vehicle that's Okay. they're not supposed to do that, but they will whatever they want and nothing will happen to them. Except there was that story yesterday, the guy was off duty and attacked a seventy-two year old man and his daughter, and then he got shot. That was a nice story He didn't die. I'm happy that the man and daughter who were being assaulted by some drunken weirdo were okay. That's why I'm happy. Not that he was shot. Anyway, Watch out for the ice vehicles because they will run you over. And they also tampered with the scene. The sheriffs here said this was in Texas. Which of course they do whatever. they are, in my opinion, a criminal organization that should be dismantled. at least twelve killed and hundreds injured in Saudi Arabia airport missile strikes. That happened yesterday. I didn't see the death toll when I read the story. Or it wasn't a part of the story then. Twelve killed. this is the Houthis attacking 'cause of strikes on Yemen and the Iran war. It's a whole fucking mess. pretty avoidable. Saudi Arabia's been doing all this public relations over the years, trying to make it like a destination and I wouldn't go there. this is definitely gonna have a negative impact on the Saudi Arabia tourism push. AI surveillance startup flock to cut several hundred jobs amid backlash sources say. I could be cynical and say there'll just be another company. they're never gonna stop. They say the people have spoken, people are losing their jobs at Flock. If you work at the Flock place, I know it's hard to get jobs but you get you you should find another job if you can. not to be too judgmental, people just taking a gig. Or you work there. Okay, if you do work at the flock place and you can't find another job, work slowly. Don't be good at your job. That's nice that you could do that. Halloween candy prices rise as Americans prepare to spend thirteen point five billion dollars this season. You could be the house that gives out NECCA wafers. Nobody likes that house, but you're not getting stormed by kids. You gotta be the house that gives out the big candy bars. Those people are so needy. You need to be liked that badly. You're giving out a full size Snickers. It's great when you're a kid and you get the full size Snickers. But think about the psychology of that later. what's going on in your personal relationships that you need to do this? drone strike by Sudan paramilitary kills forty-one near Ethiopian border, rights group says. People are the fucking worst. Who's not committing human rights violations? It's everywhere. Just killing, killing, killing. I guess that's what makes the news. But it's still a lot of killing. That's why everybody needs to take deep breath. maybe up that five count to a to a ten. Inhale ten seconds, hold ten seconds, exhale ten seconds. Think about your life. Be thankful. Man and his nephew jailed for child sex offences. It's a very disturbing headline. It's in England. So anytime you're talking to British people, particularly if you're American, talking to British people, and you feel like, this person must be really smart because they're British. You think about these these guys. they're pieces of shit too.