Latest / The Mental Healness Podcast / 3 Ways that a narcissist may try and trap you
Transcript
- 0:00What is going on, Beautiful people.
- 0:01Today we're talking about how some narcissists will try to
- 0:05trap you in a relationship like different ways that they try to
- 0:08trap you and keep you there if you're new Here.
- 0:10My name is Lee Hammock. I'm a clinically diagnosed
- 0:12narcissist. And welcome to another episode
- 0:14of The Narcissist Code. Boom.
- 0:33Welcome back. Welcome back.
- 0:34Welcome back, folks. Yes, yes, yes.
- 0:37Different ways that narcissists and toxic people will try to
- 0:42trap you in their relationship with them.
- 0:44The the old Trap card, you know what I mean?
- 0:46The the the trap car the narcissistic people carry around
- 0:49in their, in their wallets is right behind their driver's
- 0:52license and in front of their favorite debit card, you know?
- 0:57But this is what happens a lot of times.
- 0:59Y'all just being realistic, just being real with you.
- 1:01A lot of narcissists and types of people will do just like
- 1:03this. This is the type of stuff that
- 1:05will absolutely happen. Like they will play the they
- 1:08they try to trap you. Narcissists don't like to be by
- 1:11themselves. Let's keep it hot.
- 1:13Let's keep it hot and ready. Like a Little Caesar's pizza.
- 1:15Narcissistic people hate to be by themselves, right?
- 1:18So the fact that they hate to be by themselves, they like to try
- 1:20to keep people around long term, even if they don't really want
- 1:24to be with that person. Do I need to say that again?
- 1:27They will try to keep you around even if they don't want to be
- 1:32with you. Even if they have a new supply,
- 1:36a new partner, a new hobby, whatever it is, y'all a new form
- 1:40of supply. They will try to keep you
- 1:42around, even if they don't want to actually be with you, even if
- 1:46they don't want to have these feelings for you anymore.
- 1:49That's what a lot of narcissistic people will do.
- 1:51So in order to do this, a lot of them will trap you.
- 1:56A lot of them will try to trap you.
- 1:58Yeah, I'm just, this is me just being real and this is me
- 2:01keeping it hot and ready. You know, I keep it hot and
- 2:03ready like a little Caesar pizza.
- 2:05But it's going, it's going to sound kind of controversial.
- 2:07I'm going to prepare you for this.
- 2:08But the 1st way, you know, I know.
- 2:10Y'all going to say, y'all going to agree with this.
- 2:12The first way a lot of narcissists will try to trap you
- 2:14is or keep you there. Is the baby.
- 2:17Yes, a baby. They will either get pregnant by
- 2:21you, they love that, or they will try to get you pregnant.
- 2:26That's how it works. They yeah, babies.
- 2:28And I'm telling you, this is the main Trap card.
- 2:30The baby card is the main trap card.
- 2:32It's like it's like the big joker when you're playing
- 2:34spades, you know whatever the the the biggest set is, the best
- 2:38set is. And when you're playing poker,
- 2:40that's what this is. That's what the baby is to a
- 2:42narcissist. Pardon the Interruption.
- 2:44Just want to let you know that I do have courses and support
- 2:46groups available as well. Courses to help you understand
- 2:49what you went through and support groups to help you
- 2:51during or after the toxic relationship.
- 2:52Link in the description and back to the video.
- 2:55You know, it's literally the big joker when you're playing
- 2:58Spades, it wipes out all the other trap cards, right?
- 3:00No matter what other card you play, the baby card is always
- 3:03going to be their favorite card, you know?
- 3:05And this is a card that they can play repeatedly.
- 3:09This is a card that they can play over and over and over and
- 3:13over again. Yeah, yes.
- 3:16A narcissistic person will have 3456 kids, six kids with you and
- 3:19not want to be with you. They'll keep getting.
- 3:22They'll keep having babies by you or keep babies will keep
- 3:24popping up in this relationship even if they want, don't want to
- 3:27be with you because they feel like the more kids you have by
- 3:29them, the more tied to them that you are and the less likely you
- 3:34are to move on from now. And this is the mindset of a lot
- 3:36of, you know, this is the mindset of a lot of toxic,
- 3:39narcissistic people. Just yeah, yeah, most times it's
- 3:42going to be like most narcissistic people.
- 3:44Y'all are going to be men. And that's just just just
- 3:46statistically, that's just the this, that's that's just the
- 3:49stats and this is coming from a male narcissist.
- 3:52So yes, women can be narcissists as well.
- 3:54So this is not me trying to rock back on my the guys I talk to
- 3:58and I help or whatever. Y'all know that I believe that
- 4:00women can be narcissists. I've dealt with female, I've
- 4:02dealt with female narcissists before.
- 4:04But yeah, some narcissistic men will absolutely try to keep
- 4:07babies in you because they feel like they lower they they this
- 4:10is the mindset. This is not, this is not what
- 4:11I'm saying. Y'all, so don't take this the
- 4:14wrong way. The mindset of a lot of
- 4:16narcissists is the more babies I put into you, the less likely
- 4:21you are to leave me because you feel tied to me spiritually,
- 4:25romantically, and financially. Love whatever it is, but also in
- 4:28my mind, nobody else will want you.
- 4:31Because if I keep getting you pregnant, if I keep having
- 4:33putting babies in you, nobody else is going to want you.
- 4:36So you have to stay with me. You have to be here.
- 4:39They feel like every baby they put in into you lowers your
- 4:42value to other people. That's the mindset of a lot of
- 4:45narcissistic people right there. They want to keep putting babies
- 4:48in you because they feel like it traps you there with them.
- 4:50Even if they go out here cheating, even if even if they
- 4:52are here lying and manipulating, you know?
- 4:55And a lot of people will kind of try to convince you of the same
- 4:57thing. You got six kids, y'all need to
- 4:59stay together. You got six kids, you need to
- 5:01y'all need to work it out. They are here cheating.
- 5:04They got kids having kids outside the marriage.
- 5:06Y'all need to work it out. Y'all need to work together.
- 5:07Y'all need to work through this. People keep telling you that and
- 5:09the narcissist convince you convinces you of that as well.
- 5:13The baby is a trap card and they keep keep playing it over and
- 5:16over and over again and certain y'all know the laws.
- 5:19Laws in certain states are changing.
- 5:22Laws in certain states are changing.
- 5:23So some narcissists you don't have the option to if you know
- 5:26if this is your personal belief that you want to get rid of a
- 5:29baby. You don't even have the option
- 5:31of getting rid of a baby when you 236 weeks pregnant.
- 5:35You you can't even get rid of it.
- 5:37You can't get rid of the baby anymore.
- 5:38So it's just like some narcissistic people know that.
- 5:40They know the laws are like, oops, you're pregnant and you
- 5:42can't get a you can't get rid of it because you go to jail.
- 5:47They try to trap you with kids. Y'all.
- 5:48So be very careful. As I said, it's.
- 5:51I know it's different. Y'all married and been together
- 5:53for a long time. Y'all have multiple kids and
- 5:55this is your plan. But some narcissists, when they
- 5:57feel like you're about to break up with them, they will try to
- 6:00put a baby in you or try to get you to put a baby in them
- 6:02because they feel like this is going to tie you to them
- 6:05forever. And they, like I said,
- 6:07narcissistic people don't pick dead.
- 6:09They don't, they don't try to intentionally pick deadbeat
- 6:11other parents. Right.
- 6:13They don't try to pick deadbeat other parents.
- 6:14So you have a narcissistic woman that's trying to get pregnant by
- 6:17you. She's not going to pick somebody
- 6:19that's going to abandon the kids.
- 6:20She's going to pick somebody whose reputation is has a good
- 6:22reputation. So if you try to abandon her or
- 6:25threaten to abandon her, you're like, oh, you going to leave the
- 6:26kids. You don't want to be Co parent.
- 6:28I'm going to blast you online. I'm going to expose you.
- 6:29You you say right there. But they really they threaten to
- 6:31ruin your reputation. So you stay or it's a religious
- 6:35thing. They use that right there to
- 6:37keep you there as well. So this is the mindset of a lot
- 6:39of narcissistic people. Y'all.
- 6:40So they're like, this is the stuff that you have to fight
- 6:43against. Now I know it sounds ass
- 6:44backwards sometimes, but like that this doesn't sound ass
- 6:47backwards. This is ass forwards, ass
- 6:48forward. Don't y'all.
- 6:51If you take your time, I know you can, You can take your time
- 6:54and still get pregnant by a horrible person.
- 6:56But the the chances are very or less the chances.
- 6:59The longer you stay with somebody, the typically the
- 7:01better. You know who they are.
- 7:03You know? So you just meet somebody and
- 7:04within 2-3 weeks are pregnant. Come on now, they will just they
- 7:08like they love having that permanent supply.
- 7:11So babies are we. I know I wouldn't.
- 7:12I wouldn't know what the great detail, but babies are
- 7:15absolutely one of the main ways that narcissists will trap you,
- 7:18right? The next way that a lot of
- 7:20narcissistic people will try to trap you is finances.
- 7:24Finances. They will absolutely try to trap
- 7:29you with the finances. They will try to get you tied
- 7:31into them, tied in with them financially in some way, shape
- 7:35or form. You know the financial umbrella
- 7:37is big because babies can be underneath the the per view or
- 7:41underneath the umbrella of the financial trapping.
- 7:44The financial abuse, right they this is how they can get you
- 7:48right here. They get you to cosign on a car
- 7:50with them, buy a house together with them, sign a lease with
- 7:54them. You know, share bank accounts,
- 7:57only have one bank account. Put them in charge of all the
- 7:59money. They financially hit you
- 8:03financially dependent upon them so they feel like or financially
- 8:06tied together with them in some type of way, shape or form.
- 8:09So it makes you harder to leave them.
- 8:11Now you feel like they feel like you might feel like you're
- 8:12trapped in this relationship dynamic with them.
- 8:15You might even have. You might not even have kids
- 8:16with this person, but y'all started a business together and
- 8:19the business is actually doing pretty good.
- 8:21You don't want to leave the business because they were
- 8:24require. You know, you don't.
- 8:25Sometimes you don't want to break up with them because they
- 8:27require you to leave the business behind or go to court.
- 8:31And you know that a lot of narcissists are going to fight
- 8:33you with the court stuff. They're going to fight they're
- 8:35they're they will use the court system to absolutely abuse you
- 8:39and whatnot. So you have to prepare for that
- 8:42as well because a lot of narcissistic people will
- 8:45absolutely do this to try to trap you in there.
- 8:47So take your time. Y'all with the finances.
- 8:51Don't go buy a car with somebody, don't put, don't sign
- 8:54your name to something if you just met this person.
- 8:57Get to know their finances, don't Co sign on a loan for them
- 9:01if you don't know them. You know what I'm saying?
- 9:02If they've been cheating and lying and manipulating, going
- 9:04and using your car to you know, if they don't have anything when
- 9:07you meet them, don't build them up.
- 9:08So we can. If they don't have anything when
- 9:10you meet them and they start cheating, when they don't have
- 9:12nothing, do you think they're going to start?
- 9:14You don't think they're going to stop cheating?
- 9:15You don't build them up and they they get something else.
- 9:17No, they're going to take the finances and use them against
- 9:20you. Now, don't put everything in
- 9:22their name. This is like, this is me just
- 9:24giving. This is kind of life advice too.
- 9:27Don't put every single thing in their name when you don't have
- 9:29anything financially, you know, financial safety, all the
- 9:33businesses, all the cars, all the houses, all the everything
- 9:36is in their name. You have no rights to nothing.
- 9:38And y'all not married. They just bring up with you.
- 9:40You get you entitled to nothing. Come on now, come on.
- 9:44Especially if y'all did it together.
- 9:45Come on now, don't let them financially trap you or
- 9:48financially abuse you. Because a lot of times I get
- 9:50people in these situations. I talk to people even inside of
- 9:53my support group, where people are just saying, yeah, I can't,
- 9:55I I want to leave, but I can't. Because financially I, you know,
- 9:59financially I'm stuck. Financially I'm stuck.
- 10:03So it takes a while. You can still.
- 10:04You can build it up, but it takes a while, you know.
- 10:07So watch out for the finances because a lot of narcissistic
- 10:09people will try to trap you financially.
- 10:12They will. So be careful on that right
- 10:14there. Y'all and the last main way.
- 10:16If y'all have other ways that y'all want to list you can drop.
- 10:18You can of course you can drop them in the comment section.
- 10:20I'm I'm appreciative of that right there.
- 10:22I can do it. Part 2 of this I'm going to do
- 10:24three ways I can list. If I list out a ton of ways then
- 10:27the video in about 30 minutes. Y'all know I like to keep them
- 10:30live in 1213 minutes. OK, the last way I'm going to
- 10:34talk about is religiously with the religious trap, the trap of
- 10:39God. God don't want you to leave this
- 10:43relationship. God said you put you're married
- 10:47to me and you cannot leave Jesus.
- 10:51Jesus don't like the voice. The pastor is on my side.
- 10:57The pastor's wife might be on your side, but the pastor's on
- 11:01my side. So the pastor overrides his
- 11:03wife. Watch out for the religious
- 11:08trap, y'all, because if you're part of a certain religious
- 11:11denomination, that is, it makes it very difficult or shames you
- 11:17or gets you excommunicated to get divorced or leave a
- 11:20relationship. Watch out for that type of
- 11:22person. You know, I know everybody's
- 11:24situation is different and some people are raised and born into
- 11:27this lifestyle, the religious lifestyle.
- 11:29But if you're not born into it, even if you are born into it and
- 11:32you waking up right now, these are decisions you could you have
- 11:35to make right now. The thing about it is like, OK,
- 11:37do I really, really want to be doing this right here?
- 11:41Is this something I really want to be doing right here for the
- 11:44rest of my life? Because as long as they feel
- 11:47like you are, as long as they feel like the religion is super
- 11:50important to you, they're going to weaponize it against you, be
- 11:53it Muslim. Hindu, Christianity, whatever it
- 11:58is, Catholic, I know Christian, I know Catholic falls under the
- 12:04umbrella of Christianity. Whatever it is, whatever
- 12:07denomination of Christianity you are, whatever it is, yeah, these
- 12:10are things you have to think about.
- 12:12These are things you absolutely have to think about and consider
- 12:14when you're done with a toxic, narcissistic person is that they
- 12:17will trap you religiously. Even if you're not a part of
- 12:20this religion and you and you convert to their religion, they
- 12:23make it feel like you're the worst, most evil person on the
- 12:26planet if you try to leave them, no matter what they do, Beating
- 12:28on you, hitting on you, cheating on you, whatever it is you know.
- 12:31So watch out for these traps. Y'all.
- 12:32I hope this video butches some clarity.
- 12:34Hope butches some peace. Of course, make sure you
- 12:37subscribe to the channel if you haven't already.
- 12:38It helps reach more people you know.
- 12:40As always, Y'all Mr. Misses out peace.
- 12:43Thank you so much for making it to the end of my video.
- 12:45I am extremely grateful for you have no idea.
- 12:48If you haven't already, make sure you go ahead and subscribe
- 12:50to the channel, help us reach more people and click on the
- 12:52screen to watch another video or to browse through another
- 12:54playlist. There's also a link on the
- 12:56screen to check out my courses and my support groups to help
- 12:59you heal and understand what you've been through.
- 13:01Thank you so much again. I will see you in the next
- 13:03video. Peace.