Latest / overslept w/ chris laker / im probably wrong - oct 09 2026
Transcript
- Chris Laker: A few days ago I titled an episode Weird Shaped Head and some people thought I was talking about myself saying I have a weird shaped head, which I was not. That title was referencing the American Idol guy who killed his wife. got a weird shaped head. My head's fine. I wouldn't be remarking about his weird shaped head if he didn't murder his wife. Once somebody murders their wife or does something of on that scale of fucked up, you get to comment on their appearance. Otherwise it's it no, that's mean. that's a rule that I made up for me. everybody can have their own limits on when they can make fun some people say never. Never make fun of anybody's appearance. that's too much. Doesn't matter if they kill their wife, because if I make fun of him about his weird-shaped head, there's somebody who didn't murder their wife who also has a weird-shaped head, and they hear that and they're like they feel bad about their weird-shaped head. But you don't have to feel bad about your weird-shaped head because it's only because he murdered his wife that I'm noticing he's got a weird-shaped head. So don't worry, I don't think I have a weird shaped head. If that was a concern of anybody else, I believe I have a normal shaped head And you should be okay with your head. even if your head's shaped exactly like that American Idol guy, He's not even an American Idol guy. Talk about him like he's Bo Bice. He was on American Idol sort of in twenty thirteen. When I think somebody's bad, I want to say mean things about them, even though they don't hear them. He doesn't know I'm saying he has a weird shaped head, so it's not hurting his feelings. So I guess it doesn't make sense I'm probably wrong about making fun of people's appearance. I'm gonna continue to do it. there might come a time where I decide time to stop that. That ice shooting in New York City yesterday's got me in a bit of a mood. I'm pretty angry. I'm not officially starting the news yet, but I shot a guy in New York. You probably saw this story already. They shot into a car. There was a five year old in the car, and they shot this guy. He's still alive. They say he weaponized his car. You can't say weaponized car every day and expect people to give a shit. I don't care. If you say a car is weaponized, I don't believe you. If you said he had a weaponized gun, I kinda wouldn't care. But a weaponized car, no. Don't give a fuck. You shot into a car with a five year old. We didn't know the five year old was in there. Yeah, that's why you just don't go shooting into cars. I think and other people are saying this too, that the goal is to incite riots before the election, declare a state of emergency. I don't even think that's a conspiracy theory. I would say it's a theory that makes a lot of sense. I hope it doesn't happen. So nobody riot before the midterms, please. And don't riot at all. A class war, I wouldn't mind seeing it. I'm not going to be in the class war. I'm I'm not trained, not able to participate in the class war. But remember that I am broke. gonna get to the news now because CNN has been compromised. They're owned by right wing billionaires. So somebody's gotta give you the news. And well, some of this news is from CNN, the Reddit sorted by hot, but I'm not gonna read the CNN version. Because I don't trust them anymore. I don't know who I trust now. NPR? the Associated Press. Are they compromised the Associated Press? Who owns the Associated Press? So you shouldn't even know who owns these companies. I don't know why the people who own the companies want to make a big deal out of hey, it's me. I own the company. Big deal. You bought a company. You bought HBO. you're not HBO though. you're just like a fail son who wanted to be an actor and now you own HBO. now HBO means nothing to me. so now I'm gonna get to the news. Seattle City Council passes ban on AI grocery surveillance pricing. This is why there needs to be regulation. Deregulation, they will suck the life out of everybody. They want to price groceries based on the time of day, based on how much money they think you have. And then that'll be the price you pay. What's the most you'll pay for some bread? fact that a store even thought to do dynamic pri whatever the fuck they want to call this shakedown means they can't be trusted. of course they can't be trusted. I trust Whole Foods. Whole Foods is evil. It is the closest supermarket to my home. And I do go to Ralph's sometimes. I ate those blueberries from Ralph's. I forgot to talk about that. I have not gotten E. coli yet. But they they were tasteless. They were not very good blueberries. simply organic Kroger slash Ralph's frozen blueberries. Do not recommend. any supermarket has got a price on the shelf on a digital thing that can change, you get out of there. It's gotta be printed. Gas prices face new threat as Hurricane Isasis forces widespread Gulf Oil shutdowns. That's the problem with fucking things up from being stupid is then a hurricane comes in, you it just makes it so much worse. But we will beat that record, the record high gas prices, which were probably set yesterday gonna get higher than that even. And people said we couldn't do it. They were wrong. US imposes sanctions on ICC International Criminal Court hours after former judge wins Nobel Peace Prize. Well, of course the United States doesn't like an international court because we don't do war crimes. We're the United States. And the international court wants to hold us accountable. That ain't gonna happen. I I don't know if it has anything to do with the Nobel Prize. I know Trump thinks he should get the Nobel Prize because he is wrong. He's wrong about a lot of things and that's one of those things that he is wrong about. now they're calling the International Criminal Court fake because that's what he calls things, He makes noises, they come out of his mouth, and then some people act like those noises have meaning But the international court is not fake. It's a real institution. Two Renoir paintings stolen from French Museum have been found. Six arrested. That makes me sad. It is for the best. The paintings are recovered. They should not be in some weirdo rich art collectors stolen art gallery that nobody gets to see. I just love an art heist and I gotta be on the side of the thieves. I want them to get away with it. I want them to sell the paintings. It's one last job. they were just gonna do this one last job and they were gonna be out. And now they got busted. It's very hard to pull off an art high. Six people. Somebody's gonna slip up. That's why I'm not an art thief. I would love to be an art thief. I don't care if I go to jail. Newly released video shows six year old defiant after Virginia school shooting. It's just fucking tragic, this kid. This kid's so messed up. He shot his teacher and he's yelling at the cops in this way that's like he's a six years old. At six years old, I barely knew what was going on. It would be nice if this kid got the help that he needs to be emotionally stable. The teacher that he shot is okay. not trying to charge him for murder as an adult or something like that. kids, a huge responsibility. That's why I don't have any. Cornell's Jane Doe is terrified after police swarmed her home in a swatting incident, her lawyer says. that Michael Tracy piece of shit. He's some sort of independent journalist who loves Epstein anything that's awful he decides to be the champion of He tweeted her name and her address Michael Tracy's a detestable person and I wish him ill. That's editorial commentary from me saying he's a detestable person and I wish him ill. But he did dox Cornell's Jane Doe. Pentagon says execution of Fort Hood Shooter will be live streamed. That's how much Saudi money is running through this country right now is we're gonna start having public executions, why stop it live streaming? Roll the TV into the classroom so all the kids can take a little break from learning to watch a person die. It'll be a nice trauma bonding moment for a generation to have. I don't know what's going on with this weird, like early teen edgelord instinct that's running the country. You it's a bad idea, don't do it. I mean they're gonna do it 'cause they only like bad ideas. the United States government's embarrassing. US charity plans to use AI to monitor its Gaza classrooms for hateful speech. Nothing builds trust like AI monitoring. If you're doing nothing wrong, you got nothing to be afraid of. I wonder what the parameters of hateful speech are and who sets them. And is that alarm gonna go off a lot during history class? average long term US mortgage rate at highest level in nearly three years after seventh weekly rise in a row. That's good, right? I don't know, I'm never gonna buy a home. Nobody can afford a house. Bring it up, bring it down. No one's gonna buy a house, whatever the rate is. House costs a lot of money. You have to have like all this money already then owe the more money. it's so much money. And then there's the other stuff you gotta do. Then then you gotta pay for like the roof leaks or something. Raise it up again next week. We're not buying houses. guess rich people are buying houses. They like to buy houses because they save money somehow. Home ownership is a scam. I firmly believe that.